Self-Destructive

>>17944316
What fucks me up is when she is talking with whoever she is with she obviously pay less attention to me so I have more time to myself and not clinging onto a small hope of me getting with her. But when she is single we talk nearly all day everyday and it sucks when that is suddenly taken away.

>>17944410
She's using you dude, for emotional support and drops you once she gets someone she prefers over you (a new bf). You need to judge these kind of people, and most really, by their actions and not what they say, for that is where the truth to thier intentions lie

>>17944438
I thought that at first, and I put it to the test, I went to her for emotional support and she gave it and helped me out and feel better. I can understand that concept of emotional tampon tho, but I honestly think a part of me felt ok about it because she would come to me with her problems and I felt a little special about it. We didnt just talk about bad things but still it did come out sometimes.

>>17944410
If you feel like you're in love with her, then you need to ask her out when she's single. It's the only way you'll ever not feel like shit in the long term.

Either
>It works out (good for you!)
>She says no and you can disconnect and/or move on (more painful upfront, way better in the long run)
>You stay on your current path and get [some] level of emotional satisfaction when she's single, followed by a long, potentially permanent feeling of misery when she's taken

I guess this is all pretty obvious, but sometimes it helps to have it all spelled out right in front of you.

In what ways are you looking to self improve?

>>17944463
She is taken now, she posted on snapchat some stories that make it pretty obvious

I feel like in life there are three things that you can improve with

Physical Aspects
> I want to get in shape
> I want to be attractive and not lose anyone I care about again if I am ever lucky enough to meet someone like her out there again in life

Mental Aspect
> College
> Degree

Spiritual Aspect
> Be happy with myself
> Have no regrets
> Pursue my impossible dreams and see how far I get

Those are the things I feel like I need to work on. I just sit in my house online all day if I don't have work or something and I have a part time job so I don't work alot.

What I really truly want and it might sound kinda shitty but I want to surpass what she saw in me, or what anyone has seen in me recently. I may be doing it all out of spite but I want to show everyone who ever looked down on me that they made a big mistake and I am alot better then what they thought.

>>17944474
How old are you (out of curiosity)?

Getting in shape really isn't that hard if you set your mind to it. Once you get past the first few weeks of a routine it starts to fly by like nothing. I recommend visiting /fit/ and using MyFitnessPal (app) to track your daily calories (it's actually really easy). The thing about self-improvement is that ultimately, I think it has to be done for YOU. Lifting to impress a girl can be a good source of motivation (it's what got me started...). but over time I think you'll realize that the gains themselves are their own reward.

If you can stick to a workout/diet routine for two months I think you'll be very impressed with the results. Accomplishing something like that can do wonders for your motivation and self-esteem. It might just give you that final push to move forward with your education.

Based on everything you've told me the situation with this girl doesn't sound healthy. I'd say hit the weights, try to stay focused on other things, but ask her out if she ever becomes single again. If she says no then don't sweat it, you're a fit dude with a promising future.

>>17944522
I am 22, but if you couldn't tell I haven't been in a relationship yet or had sex. Its half to do with my looks and half to do with I consider sex to be special and with someone I care about and I grew up around girls in my life who never have filled that position until i met her.

btw what is unhealthy about it? I am just curious to hear some other persectives of my story and problem.