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Can we have a thread for socially awkward people? I mean people

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Can we have a thread for socially awkward people? I mean people who are perceived as boring, weird, awkward etc. I need advice on how to talk to other people. How to fit into group situations and conversations. Nobody really likes me. I have some friends but I get ignored in group situations because I don't know how to act. It's like people are speaking a different language. Some things I figured out (I'm 24 and this is stuff most people probably learn at 12 or 13)

1. always be positive
2. never interrupt
3. think really, really hard about if what you're saying fits into the conversation/is worth saying
4. try and relax

But, none of that shit really works and I spend most of my time alone ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
>>
If I were a complete dullard autist I think I could just accept that and kill myself but there are times when I can be really funny and engage people. I pretty much never fit into a group though. i think I have something approaching a personality its just when I do/say something that gets socially rewarded I have no idea what I did or how to replicate it. I think I'm just a quiet person and I have social anxiety that causes me to "force it" like. my average response to any stimuli is like "Ok" I don't have much to say. my thoughts are extremely, extremely weird and pretty boring I think most of the time. But I don't just want to say nothing. I'm kinda losing my mind over it. I hate being a socially awkward weirdo. I want to die most of the time
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I'm with OP on this one. It's great being a party and sitting alone staring into the abyss *sarcasm*. Never really had a conversation with anyone for the entire duration of the party.
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>>17935759
>3. think really, really hard about if what you're saying fits into the conversation/is worth saying

This is false, don't do this.
>>
I'm guessing you overthink a lot. The thing is, no one gives a shit about you as much as you think. If you say something stupid or awkward, others will forget it ever happened in 5 minutes. Don't beat yourself up for no reason, say what you want to say, do what you want to do, be enthusiastic, positive and remember that no one really cares about you the way you think they do.
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>>17935759
you are perceived as weird because you do 1 and 3 and to some extend 2. 4 is good but too broad.

you feel like you have nothing interesting to say, can't disagree or have a digferent opinion on something and as if you always have to be bubbly and joyfull. that's
B
O
R
I
N
G

nobody wants to talk to the equivalent of a political correct fb bot.

be bold, state your opinions, share your random stories and facts.

ofc, don't be a douchebag. but you can easily aboid that by not making mean remarks about others or making edgy comments in inappropriate settings (pol humor is not for post meeting luch with co-workers for example. r9k humor is not a good conversation starter on a date. and so on).

what you need to learn is how to be a good listener. that's one half. you can be a perfect listener by actually giing a fuk about the person you talk to and the subject talked about. if you are really caught up in the conversation, things like "looking interested" and "asking follow up questions/making encouraging remarks" will happen atumotically.

the other part is to also SHARE. people do like to talk about themselfes. but not soleley and not all of them (see you for example). so share some of your toughts! your experiences and ideas. yes, people care and they want to hear. otherwise, they could also talk to a wall. if there's no feedback they will simoly give up after a while. and boring phrases and pre made answers are NOT feedback.
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>>17935789
yeah. I even had a girl I was interested in and was clearly interested in me like told me I was cute say I overthink things. and that was probably why we never ended up having sex. it kills me. but how do I stop and just relax and be myself? do I need xanax or something?
>>
You can train yourself to be more extroverted in social situations

It takes effort to do it, but eventually it will become more naturally
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>>17935795
the thing is that I try to do these things but I mostly fail and kind of act like a child, being moody, saying whatever pops into my head sometimes, I definitely have strong opinions but it doesn't always endear me to people. sometimes I really get along with people. I tell myself I'm just a strong flavor that's not for everyone.
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It doesn't help that I have bipolar disorder. I'm kind of hyper expressive sometimes. It really hurts, like my body shakes and I get headaches and I want to die. it feels like my limbs are encased in thick plastic, it's hard to explain. I'm having an episode right now. I could handle being alone before but now that I developed this disorder I actually want to kill myself and I don't want to die. Please help me. I can't take medication I'm joining the navy because my family is kicking me out because I act like a huge asshole separate story
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Super cliche but true: accept yourself. Fucking work on doing that. If you can't accept who you are, don't expect others to accept you and want to hang out with you.

*Mike drop.*
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>>17935929
What did Mike ever do to you? I think you mean Mic :P

But on a serious note, that's pretty solid advice.
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>>17935939
Biggest laugh in a while I've just had Poor Mike. Yeah mic is what I meant. Thank you :)
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I relate deeply to this as it reminded me of what I used to be like. I'm sharing how I got out of this. This might not be the answer you're looking for but it's what worked for me.

I got out of this situation by investing in myself. I was not defined enough as a person to naturally express myself and as a result, took on a social persona. It was completely fake and I never invested in it as a result.

I would recommend taking up many different passions in life. Take a look at all the options that are available in life and experiment with them.
Furthermore you can realize confidence and mental clarity by investing in health. Your mental state is affected by your physical state by a significant degree. I transformed when I started physically training and eating healthy. To clarify, by eating healthy, I am talking about eating raw natural foods as opposed to counting calroies or anything of that sort. Applying this sort of discipline in my life makes me stand out from others and over time like minded people found their way to me.

You can also start reading books from drastically different cultures to see life from a more complete and wholistic perspective. I read and studied from people who were concerned with their own benefit to get immersed in such a mindset. As a result I started investing deeply in my own development.

I would recommend looking into Wim Hof. What he does is basically completely unheard of in western society. He succeeded and developed a following by being committed to what he loves to do. There's a 40 min long video on him from vice on youtube that changed my life
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>>17935781
THIS is false
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>>17935769
me too high five
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>>17935759
>Can we have a thread for socially awkward people?

hello ? 3/4 of the threads in here are like this
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>>17935759
This was me growing up. Just letting my sense of humor out pretty much fixed it all.
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>>17935795
i'd rather be alone than a person who uses exclamation points
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Normal people dont analyse everything that comes out of their mouth before they say it.

You also dont have to be positive all the time if you dont feel that way. If you are faking positivity people will sense that as well, and it will be offputting.

Growing up i was very introverted, and only spoke about the few topics I was interested in. It wasnt until later that i realised that many people are uncomfortable around others that are 'too quiet'.

You dont have to filter too much. Listen to what other people say on a day-to-day basis - its hardly philosophy or Shakespeare.

Really you just have to 'hone in' on your natural personality belong the surface and refine yourself.

Find some semi-socially acceptable interests that can be good conversation fodder.

Also keep in mind most people are pretty fucking dumb, so theyre not thinking and analysing their own words/thoughts too much.. theyre just spewing them up as it comes to them.
>>
* below the surface
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>>17935769
>there are times when I can be really funny and engage people.
I thought so too, until I talk to other people who've talked to the person I thought I was being funny and engaging to and she said I was awkward and weird. Fml at least tell me or show some signs that I'm fucking up instead of smiling and politely going along with it.
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>>17935759
always the grimesfags
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>>17937476
>Normal people dont analyse everything that comes out of their mouth before they say it.
They don't need to because they're already normal.
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>>17937514
>I thought so too, until I talk to other people who've talked to the person I thought I was being funny and engaging to and she said I was awkward and weird.

THIS. In the few ocassions I manage to engage a nice conversation, and I feel like I'm doing a great job, the other person usually says "you are very shy, don't you?" or "you seem like a really quiet guy", and that lets me down. Like, my effort isn't enough.
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>>17935759
>1 on 1
I can do it
>2 other people
I can engage 30 percent of the tIme but definitely feel lile a 3rd wheel
>3 other people
"Oh here we go i have something to add to this topic, okay, wait for him to fibish talking...okay after her, shit hes talking again...and the topic changed..."
>4 plus
Only 3 hours and 23 min until I have a viable excuse to leave!
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>>17938695
Pretty much me with a recent addition of getting legit panic attacks when attempting to socialize with groups of people I don't know (clubs/socieities) which is the reason I more or less just stopped doing it.

Probably just too broken and incompatible with dealing with people that even my body nopes out.
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>>17938738
Older I get the sharper the anxiety feels. Got anxiety from a social situation in a fucking movie recently, as well as driving at night.

Im literally self sabotaging myself to avoid social situations so I dont feel like Im lying
>Credit card is declined, sorry guys looks like I cant get a ticket
>No its okay Ill just call it a night
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Let them do the talking. Just ask some questions.
People love talking about them self
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I heard there was a thread for intjs.

Scorpio too btw.
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>>17935759
>never interrupt
> think really, really hard about if what you're saying fits into the conversation/is worth saying

This is why you're a socially retarded beta, be assertive and talk about the shit you want; they might as well talk to a well if you never speak up.
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I have had stuff happen to me that I can't even make up.

Everything from east-european mobsters, to a guy shouting Allahu Akhbar on a plane to having a gun pointed at me by a girl and the power going out as she is pointing at my head. List goes on

When I start telling friends (even the closest ones) about those things, I feel like they're thinking that I'm making stuff up or exaggerating all while I tone stuff down to actually make it believable.

How do I become a better storyteller?
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Or OP in the core is just actually an introvert that doesnt like to talk to many people and rather have a little group of close friends or even one.
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I am similar to OP, but my fake social persona is very good for making friends.

Sadly, I either get tired of keeping it up or overtime get annoyed with these friends to the point where I begin distancing myself from them.

Im always jealous of people have been friends since kindergarten and such, I don't even talk to my "friends" from 6 months ago. I just find a new circle to immerse myself in before moving on to the next.

I just get tired of people, til I'm all alone then I want them again. This can't possibly be normal.
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>>17939638
This is like reading about me. I have no advice for you because I don't know what to do, either. Sometimes I'm just inclined to give up and live as a hermit for the rest of my life, but being with people feels good until it doesn't. Fuck.
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>>17939611
Might be a case for all of us here, but especially if you're a guy, being an introvert means you're fucked for life.
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>>17939638
How do I fake it? Be interested in people, pretending to be happy, what else? The whole real life interactions are weird, especially if "be yourself".
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>>17939748
You observe how other people act and then you adjust. Smiling often helps a lot. It's not that difficult, really, but it won't make you happy, either. In fact I feel worse when I'm in my fake mode.
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>>17935781
Not OP but I had someone basically tell me this one. That I would try to participate in conversations I wasn't a part of and what I contributed was irrelevant to the topic.

>>17935795
>the other part is to also SHARE. people do like to talk about themselfes. but not soleley and not all of them (see you for example). so share some of your toughts! your experiences and ideas. yes, people care and they want to hear.
The thing is, I always tried to make sure what I mentioned was related. I'm not that inept. And no one ever said anything to me. I had to hear it from my friend.

>>17936330
>Just letting my sense of humor out pretty much fixed it all.
That only works if others find your brand of humor amusing.

>>17939765
That is because authenticity is important to people like us. What good is it if the me people like is just an act?
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>>17939830
>What good is it if the me people like is just an act?
Very much true, but unfortunately most people won't like the real me (and that's a fact, not me whining) and you just can't escape social interactions at work etc. So sometimes you have to pretend.

Honestly I have come to terms with being perpetually lonely. It isn't even that bad once you have something to do, it certainly beats trying to be someone you aren't.
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>>17935759
The secret to being charismatic isn't to be interesting. It's to be interested.

Get people talking. See how long you can keep them talking, how deeply you can get them to open up. Find out what they're passionate about, and why. Introduce people to others they have things in common with.

If you can make someone feel like they excelled socially, they will associate that feeling with you. They will see you as socially excellent.

A small caveat: this works much better if you're honest. You have to actually like and take interest in people, which may be your real challenge.
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May I put my case down here?
Well I guess I'll just go ahead.
I spend a lot of time thinking about it but eventually I'm always drawn to the same conclusion. I as my true self, not the wall/shy/condescending face I show to people all the time is simply unable to socialize with the majority of the people, not all of them of course but the vast majority. Because you see, when I try to ask myself why do I hate people, why can’t I talk with them of something we will both like, the answer is actually rather simple it is because we have no common ground on which we can hope to build a relationship. Simple isn’t it. And that common ground doesn’t exist because people like me are a minority, or perhaps not and I’m just stupid. Perhaps it is also because I can only consider women or girl as mere toys or attractive reproductive devices. And that since my childhood, it isn’t new, you see. But that doesn’t mean I’m totally incompatible with people who doesn’t exactly share the same visions I have, quite the contrary. I do have some friends, but it is because we at least share some common ground. However the vast majority of the world lacks that common ground.


Now about the talking while they are many people part… Well I’m not going to lie to you I both suck at this and yet I can be really great at doing this. I suck at doing this mostly when we are in a group and there is a main subject, but well let’s say I gradually improved at this. It definitely won’t be easy, that I can guarantee it, but slowly, extremely slowly if you try to sometimes not to speak as a whole. What you can do is get near or face the one you are closer to and tell him your opinion or something on the topic, I… think it’s actually what I do, but I let it be heard loud enough so that it seams like I’m partaking in the whole conversation, and it kind of work.
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>>17939933
Part 2
Now why did I say that I was so great at speaking at large groups...I just love role playing (mostly dictators, politicians, necromancers, insane people fascinated by fire) and when I have too, well sure I’m still shy as hell, but my true sick self is present and helps me overcome this overwhelming pressure of all those stupid humans silently judging each and every one of your moves. Still because I can be who I really am!

Also although I’m able to do that with mobs, men, and ugly women/girls, I’m petrified with cute girls, literally blocked, my body doesn’t respond anymore, and I can’t fucking move. Although the entirely blocked occurred only when I tried to confess my love a long time ago.(Sorry for having only a few social experience in general but well...) Surely part of the fact why I had girl “friends” (if you can call this friends at such a young age) when I was at school because I was actually too blind and stupid to see what was next to me, I suppose. Dase it for a childhood in which social experiment and human contact mostly came from SciFi/Fantasy/French humoristic movies.

Is it human to both want something and don’t want it at the same time, knowing you’ll only hate it, that it will be awkward all the time, but you know that despite all this awkwardness you do need it?
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>>17939854
Melt both into a single delusion. Be both what you hate to be and love to be.
For exemple here you may wonder what I gain here interacting with you heh? Well nothing more simple than boasting my own delusional ego, by talking to someone I can judge my equal for realising the bullshit behind human interactions.
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>>17939854
>you just can't escape social interactions at work etc. So sometimes you have to pretend.
True, but I thought that was pretty obvious. And I think that's why interacting with people is so draining on me...especially at work.
>>
>>17935781
Agreed. Overthinking is bad.

>>17936186
No, your "THIS is false" is the real falsehood.
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>>17939933
>>17939937
ow the edge

jk you are a beautiful freak anon
>>
>be NEET drop out
>literally been playing sick and getting out of school more often than I'm there
>have no life, play WoW all day long and jerk off
>decide one day to get a job
>first breath of real life
>be really awkward but hard working
>they all seem to like me
>get first friends ever
>they actually want to hang out after work and all that jazz
>move in with group of them, social butterfly all of a sudden
>parties every weekend, I got laid within my first 6 months there (first time ever)
>group splits up
>I still remain on friendly terms with everyone
>move in with one of the friends I met
>life happens, job changes, all that jazz
>get GF
>we're together for 3 years
>she cheated on me first half of the relationship and it really broke me
>made me not want to hang out with anyone, be seen around anyway, I pushed away all of my friends and broke up with her
>somehow, someway don't laugh, we get back together
>i'm still a shell of who I was
>hate everything, hate her, hate my life now, wish things could go back to how they were
>eventually dump her again
>still having trouble reaching out to my friends to hang out
>still feel like a loser
>just want to go back into my safe NEET shell and never come out
>nobody likes me anymore or wants to hang out, or if they do I make up excuses and skip to play video games.

:/

It seems like every time I want to branch out, or do something with my life there's some perfect storm that stop me from actually following through.

Whether my car doesn't start that day, or it just snowed, or work has me busy that weekend, or I just need time to relax on my own and not do anything with anyone..
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>>17940078
I thank thee. Can't ever get enough of that edge!
Edge aside what are my chances to find a cute girl as edgy as me? (To be fair I only find girls ineteresting as sentient being because of my ego, yet I would totaly be kind with a cute girl a edgy whom I could call my equal) But to be realistic I suppose that doesn't exist, right? (unless in mental institution perhaps?)
>>
>>17935789

I disagree that people will forget in 5 minutes. If half of what you say is retarded bullshit in a conversation that lasts half an hour, the people you're talking to will know you're dysfunctional and won't see you as someone they want to be around.

My advice is to work on not having weird ideas on what to say. You're going to have to stop watching anime/playing weird video games or doing whatever weird shit you've been doing that has made you this way. Your ideas come from how you spend your time so spend it in a way similar to the people you're trying to talk to.

Either that or find friends that don't think your current ideas are stupid. Conventions/Magic tournaments/furry gatherings are full of people like you.

In either case you need to stay out of your head while in conversation, i.e. not think about what you should say. This is easy if you're connecting with the people you're talking to so use it to gage your progress at finding friends.
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>>17940185
>You're going to have to stop watching anime/playing weird video games or doing whatever weird shit you've been doing that has made you this way.
That's my main problem, I think. Even my respectable hobbies (ie., not anime/vidya) are so fucking weird that it's difficult to find anyone else who is interested, like entomology. I also prefer my hobbies to people, so I don't see myself abandoning them.
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>>17940112
they exist
try out hipster cafes/bars
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>>17940189

If you live in a city it's easy to find people with similar interests to you. They're more welcoming than normies because most of them have gone through the same shit as you. Find some of these people at a convention or through the internet and befriend them.
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>>17935759
Just be tall and handsome, no matter how much I sperg out people still tolerate me.
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>>17940201
Will definitely try to check this out someday
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>>17940202
I literally live in a village of 300 people with no means to move. In Eastern Europe. I think I'm fucked.
I do have internet friends mind you, but that's not the same as reality at all.
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>>17940314

Get close with an internet friend/gf. If they like you enough you can move to be with them. You say you have no means to move, but if you find someone you like enough you two will find a way.
>>
I'm a very boring person with no conversation whatsoever, which is pretty much the reason I haven't had a girlfriend for 10 years.
I don't even know how to be an interesting person. I research about the subjects that interest ME, but I don't think any girl would be interested in hearing how lisp relates to the lambda calculus, about hardware architectures, computer viruses, or about diophantine equations.
But I don't care, I'm not asking for advice. I can do smalltalk, very superficial interactions, and when someone shares an interest, well, the conversation can go pretty well (that's why I've had friends who are math majors).
>>
For anyone who wants some advice on how to talk in groups, this happened to me a few years back.
I realized it was just a matter of participating, so long as I didn't cross social behavioral borders, ofc. Good thing I don't have aspergers.
Anyway, I started spitting out whatever stupid thing came to my mind. I mean the kinds of out-of-context associations or wordplays. People would usually laugh. Sometimes it really amazed me how some really stupid thing to say would make everybody crack. So I kept doing it, I'd mostly be quiet during the conversation until I had somehting to say, which was usually when somebody triggered one of these associations, I'd say it, people would laugh, and soon people started to think I was witty, even though I was just spitting out random garbage, really.
I tried to force it, I decided to believe that I was witty and whenever I tried to make a "witty" comment... everybody would just ignore me.

tl;dr say whatever comes to your mind as soon as it pops (except for GAS THE KIKES ofc).
>>
Just bee yourself.

I stopped trying to please people.

Most people talk about.boring things. Small and idle talk is a waste of time.

Be quiet but confident. Say a little but when you say something, makeit impactful.

Go find someone like you
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>>17935773
Dude having a conversation with one person/group for the whole party is lame anyway, unless they're ridiculously interesting which is pretty rare tbqh
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>>17940388
This is pretty much my problem. I overthink the fuck out of everything.

Most times by the time I think of something appropriate to say they've already changed the topic.
>>
Reading some of the advice makes me realize how some people take themselves for granted, not realizing that for some people it really is an alien concept, the whole social mechanics.
Even for me, it is very hard to give advice when I "just do it".

>3. think really, really hard about if what you're saying fits into the conversation/is worth saying
And when you're done thinking, the moment has passed, people are talking about something else or you can't just branch off like you could have without being awkward.
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The best thing imo to become less socially retarded is just have life experiences. For example just travel around your own country for a couple of weeks on your own your forced to make connections and will become more interesting for it plus it won't hurt you much financially.
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>>17940408
overthinking is a very hard thing to overcome because it's a trait that's deeply rooted, not something that can just be dismissed with "just stahp doing it! :^)".
The best advice that I can give is: be bold; take the risk. Of course, you can be bold and fuck it up by being rude or offensive, so do rapidly check this in your mind: am I directly offending someone here? am I making fun of people because of their circumstances?"
Your response may also come out as awkward, but life is about taking risks, only then can you make any progress at all
>>
>>17935759
Social interaction is like dancing, OP. Worry less about the form and more about the flow, and you'll do fine.
>>
I recently noticed that I am bad at understanding speech against a noisy background.
When there's a group of people I sometimes simply can't join the conversation because I only understand half of it. This is only true when there's loud music though.
part of it might be that my natural distance to people is pretty big. I just stand too far away.
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>>17935759
>3. think really, really hard about if what you're saying fits into the conversation/is worth saying

Most people don't remember anything that's said a few minutes later. socially Its more important to say lots of meaningless stuff than a few well thought out sentences.

Small talk is for bonding.
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>>17940426
>your forced to make connections
how?
>>
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Just gonna vent a bit.

Honestly, I just stopped giving a fuck what other people think. When I was a teenager, I was very self-conscious and would waste hours worrying about how strangers or classmates might perceive me. I had a hard time quitting my job at McDonald's when I was 17 because I didn't want to disappoint the manager who'd hired me.

Now that I'm 23, I've accepted that I just don't mesh well with other people. I'm not ugly or autistic or mentally ill - I'm just not made for getting along with ordinary folk. One of my best friends is in medical school and expressed the same sentiment. He said that most of the guys in his class seem to know how to talk to other guys. The Indians befriend the other Indians, the white dudes all chill with one another, and the Arabs study at one another's houses. However, he just understand why they talk about the things they talk about.

I get where he's coming from. For instance, at Christmas, I was thought about how I couldn't contribute to the conversation my relatives and step-siblings were having - one of them would mention dogs, and then they'd talk about things their dogs did, often at length. To me, those sorts of topics are boring. They're not fun or very funny or interesting enough to spend five minutes telling stories about.

I have some really great friends, but I don't relate well to coworkers and most strangers. My jobs have taught me to get good at small talk, but I run out of juice unless I'm on a mission.

I accept who I am, but sometimes I get lonely. Most of my friends have moved out of the state or out of the country. People who don't know me tend to assume that I'm boring because I don't talk much (it's odd, because I talk a ton around people I do click with) and don't get involved with coworker parties or whatever (FFS, I've hitchhiked across fucking Iraq, but I guess I just don't have an adventurous face).

Whatever. Fuck.
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>>17935759
im with op and ever since i transferred colleges, im only ever friends with band people and no one else. Recently i tried hanging out with one of my friends but it ended up being an awkward conversation between me and her and i was very sure she was bored of me
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>>17935759
I don't have any trouble understanding people. People generally make a lot sense. But, I still find myself doing a poor job of interacting with them, because I just don't like to talk all that much, or I find myself either bored with others, getting carried away, focused on something else, or feeling uncomfortable socializing
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>>17935759
Meet other social retards from online. That is how I made my IRL friends
>>
I have trouble with eye contact. It feels weird, how do i do it?
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>>17943028
for me as well. fuck me.
>>
>>17940395
This is what I do at this point. I tried to act differently but people talk about the most boring shit. There will always be someone that points out that you're quiet but just accept it, most won't give a fuck.
>>
Can we have a kik group for this thread ? I can make one if you people throw in your names to give your approval

My kik is mocohocarolyn
>>
>>17935759
Focus on the other person. Get to know who they are. Talk about interests, hobbies, goals, values, whatever you've experienced that might entertain the person. Do new things so that you can talk about them with people. Open yourself up and give your true feelings on shit. Be genuine and if people don't like you then keep talking to more until you find the ones that do and make friends with them.
>>
>>17943591
Sorry, that's gonna just show you're desperate and people do get to know when you're trying that hard.
>>
I don't like most of my social circle how does an asspie loner meet new people?
>>
>>17935781
Exactly this.
I do this all time (cant help it) and its the worst.
I just end up sitting there in silence and dont say anything which makes me seem extremely boring and distant
>>
>>17941577
I imagine it's because you're actually trying to get out of a "comfortable" situation like being someone who doesn't leave their room.
>>
>>17935759
>2. never interrupt
I am probably more awkwarderest than you, but I noticed the opposite of this. I never ever interrupt someone without a good reason but in group environment everyone interrupts everyone. The thing that I think about for 5 minutes before saying it usually gets interrupted in group environment.

I'm not saying interrupting is good, I hate it and will never do it, but it is socially acceptable to be pushy in group environment I think.
>>
>>17935759
>never interrupt
Eventually you'll realize "interrupt" means "talking when people don't think you're worth listening to" and that it's something you're going to HAVE to do sometimes to be anything but a doormat.

> think really, really hard about if what you're saying fits into the conversation/is worth saying

And while you were doing that, the topic changed and even if what you had to say was good, you didn't get to say it. But you DID subconsciously get that "verbal constipation face" and the combination of being that guy who never speaks up and makes creepy faces will make you seem like a total loser and pussy nobody wants to be around

Being passive and silent isn't the solution, you need to be confident
>>
>have ADHD
>have trouble following conversations that don't interest me
>don't care to talk with people about things that don't interest me

I don't really know what to do about this. I don't have much of a problem talking to people, I'm just not interested in doing it and I feel like I'm missing out. Also

>have next to nothing to contribute to conversations since my life experiences are dull as fuck

I don't feel as if I have much to contribute to any conversation in the first place. Even military experience doesn't help this, I served as an aircraft mechanic stuck in bumfuck nowhere working on the most boring aircraft ever. ADHD makes this even worse, as when I do have something relevant to add to a conversation my information recall is utter shit.

The only reason I ever become friends with people is because I interact with them every day and my actions come through instead of words, but since I've been unemployed for a while I never have these interactions with people. I'd go find a hobby group or something but once again NO MONEY. I feel trapped.
>>
>>17943602
>>
Conversations move too damn quick for me. I always feel like im stuck thinking about the topic 2 or 3 topics ago when a group of people are talking. It's like normal people just talk about whatever jumps to their minds.

If I sit there and think about what im going to say it usually is way too late. As a result my contributions to a discussion end up being agreement or "hmm really makes you think"

Example:

Conversation about brother, mentions dog, conversation becomes about dogs, someone mentions adopting a dog, conversation becomes about how x hates dogs, but what about your brother?
>>
>>17943534

I realized most people are fucked.

They need constant stimulation. If you observe, they either talk, check their phones or find something to distract them, then sleep.

They need to be distracted all the damn time.

Theyre not used to the tranquility of silence and observation.
>>
>>17939590
By getting a better audience
>>
>>17939930
This guy gets it.

To elaborate on what you were saying, this video talks about something very similar.
>>
>>17944790
>this video
>>
>>17944273
That's because you're slow

:)
>>
Idk I try my hardest. I know I'm awkward but I try to have a good time anyway. I've picked up a couple of friends along the way so I consider myself lucky.. I'm fairly happy. I just tailor my life to my strengths.
>>
>>17935759
wow I have the same fucking problem :(
but I`m 20
>>
Avoid weed in social situations. I'm very confident and social but weed turns me into an awkward dummy.

Alcohol and MDMA cured my social anxiety.
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