Anxiety

that's easy.
give me an example of something that makes you anxious and i will show you the process of getting over it

>>17935765
"Did I file that paperwork my supervisor asked for before the weekend?

>>17935784
well, that one's easy since it is in the past. so, did you? or is your anxiety about not remembering if you did or not?

anyways.

you deal with anciety by thinking baout the worst things that could happen.

let's see.
you didn't file the paper.
your boss throws a rage fit because it was super important.
this will be awkward af and uncomfortable to hear him say all this stuff to you, maybe even in presence of co-workers.
then you will either have to pick up the mess your failing created or, as this is wcs, you will get fired.
so now you are unemployed and have to find a new job.
worst that can happen is that you won't find a new one and will have to start collecting financial aid.
which will make a dent in your social reputation, which will take down your worth on the dating market, thus make it impossible to procreate with the top 10% of datingmaterial.

k, that would suck.

but would you die from it?

nah, it won't be nice but you can handle a lot more than you might think.

have you ever been trough a rough patch and after it was over tought "wew, if inknew that was coming i wouldnmt have tought i would manage"?
you will always manage. that's what people do. more or less.

so, now make up a more realistic scenario.

you have filed the papers and all is fine.

or, you didn't and you will get some shit from your boss and it will be unpleasant but that's it. you CAN stand that little unpleasant moment of getting a bit of shit from your boss for making a mistake. YES YOU CAN STAND THAT!

>>17935823
I can stand that I've managed similar scenarios and came out fine yet even if I know that the outcome is will most likely be positive. I still anxious and get stressed out.
Is this natural?

>>17935845
No. This isn't natural. Talk about it with your primary doctor and go from there. You're not alone. I struggle with anxiety too and a bunch of other stuff. For me what helps is meds and talking with my psychiatrist and therapist and using coming skills I've learned.

>>17935856
Haha not coming skills. Coping skills.

>>17935856
>>17935864
a psych would be a last resort, what coping skills do you do?

>>17935880
Why would a psych be a last resort, if you don't mind me asking? I used to say it was my last resort too- and it was but, I regret that it was my last resort. I probably would've been doing better sooner.
I'm learning to accept myself. It's hard but when I look back on how I used to think, I've come a long way. I still have a long way to go.
Coping skills that work for me in anxiety inducing situations would be square breathing, counting to ten, counting back from five each thing I see and feel in the room (five things I feel, four things I smell, three things I see, two things I taste in my mouth, one deep breath I take to calm down) etc.
there are so many things you can do.

>>17935896
I'd hate to make people worry

>>17935900
Yeah. I used to feel like that too. I'd feel like such a burden and how could I possibly benefit anyone...?! Do you sometimes feel like that?

>>17935903
at times but I have a job now and has benefits
what worries me now is that stress from job may cost me my job

Hi I got sever social anxiety. First of all why would you not file papers if you knew that it was going to make you stressed out.

Second try to find the root cause of your anxiety. Maybe it's being lazy or poor time management skills.

Also try to avoid ppl that make you uncomfortable. If it's a boss or somebody you have to interact with just say the bare minimum to not seem like an asshole like hi and bye.

>>17935733
WEED
E
E
D

Smoke god damn weed you nigger. Holy shit I'm high as a giraffe's nuts so fuck you if you got a problem with this lolol

>>17935911
Yep. I understand. When dealing with anxiety we've got to learn how to manage it. I don't know you personally and I'm not a licensed professional. I do know from experience that if you're that concerned about it affecting your work life and maybe even relationships too, seeking professional help is the best option. I know it's not what you want to hear. I didn't want any progressional help. I didn't think I needed it. In fact, I was taken to get help kicking and crying my eyes out like a little two year old. But, I'm glad now. Without this help, I'd be dead.

>>17935916
I work 12-13 hours a day
stress and work takes a toll on me

>>17935916
Avoiding people that make you feel uncomfortable isn't managing stress, it's allowing your stress to control how you feel and who you talk to. Managing stress and anxiety means that you know you're alright regardless of the situation and that you can control your thoughts and your actions in any given situation while not allowing the things you can't control get under your skin.
>>17935958
Recognizing things that stress you out, like apparently your job, means you need to make some changes in your life- be it changes to your thinking, the choices you make, or even changing jobs.

>>17935963
>changing jobs.
I've been contemplating this, getting this job was hard and pays better than other companies.
So I'm still weighing the pros and cons

>>17935971
Weighing pros and cons is helpful in making decisions. What are your pros and cons if you don't mind sharing?

>>17935975
I get a lot bonuses and free shit, higher pay than other companies
>cons
a fuck ton of work
stress
substandard living conditions
expectations from parents

>>17935990
Thank you for sharing your list. To me, it looks like your cons outweigh your pros. Do you think that this job is congruent with your values?

>>17935995
short answer no
I never wanted to take a financing/business related career.
But bottom-line is it pays and people had expectations of me

>>17936006
I understand. I know from experience that if one doesn't live out their values, life is shit. Living up to other's expectations is nice at first, but then resentment sets in and life is shit.
Would you mind sharing with me what kind of job would be in line with your values?

>>17936012
Food related/nutritionist or psychology

>>17936032
Alright. So, other than the huge discomfort of feeling like you're letting your parents down because of their expectations, what's keeping you from choosing food/nutritionist psychology? What are the pros and cons of pursuing this interest that IS congruent with your values?

>>17936045
money, I'm very cheap.
Financial security is important to me too, which conflicts my desire to pursue some roads

>>17936048
Yeah I feel you. I'm pretty cheap myself...though I prefer to say frugal. My advice is to explore these avenues that interest you. You don't have to quit your current job cold turkey and jump right in. If possible, maybe cut back some hours from your job and fill those hours with a few courses at a local community college or online courses. Get in touch with others who have similar interests and ask their advice and listen to their stories. Keep exploring.

For me, I thought I had to be what my parents think is right and that thought distortion I had was a big factor in almost literally killing me. I've been through a lot and still am struggling, but I'm now pursuing what are in line with my values. Like you, psychology is of great interest to me. It took me years to get to that though.

>>17935958
It's definitely your job and how you think your family is going to react. That is the root cause. Try getting a higher potion in that job so you don't have to work as hard. If not trying getting a new job in the business area while still working at your old one.