My girlfriend is getting fat

>>17931700

yes.

>i know you're not happy with where you're going, and to be honest I'm not either. I want both of us to be the best we can be, not just for each other, but for ourselves. if you're willing, I'd love to work with you to get you back on track. We can monitor each others diets, keep each other in check, and then celebrate together when we do great jobs.

if she doesn't take that, then jump ship. but if you're already just ready to jump ship, dont worry about it. just go.

do what feels right to you.

>>17931700
how fat?

I feel like not much you can do unless she wants it too. Otherwise if you bring it up you are worse than Hitler and totally in the wrong for wanting her to take care of her body.

>>17931700

do an internet search - this is topic #1 for dating

I jumped ship, but there were multiple reasons for it. The massive weight gain was a big factor though. It was all a part of her being self-destructive and they didn't do much to make any positive changes whatsoever.

>>17931700
your fault for not pushing your efforts on her harder

women are a test for men to see how much shit they can take before moving on to a better fuck. If you're in your mid 20's then I would jump ship and play the casual game for a while before settling down, especially now since you've had women-practice. If she truly loves and cares for you, then she will do all she can to be the best person you (along with all non-deluded, human males) want her to be.

Ex had rapid weight gain and usually subsequent loss. Mostly linked to her mood and mental health, she wasn't a very happy person and would comfort eat. I could help by suggesting and making effort to take the lead initiating healthy activities and buying and making healthy food. I was kind of a prick to her though and resented the fact that I had to project manage her weight for her benefit while constantly being positive and NEVER bringing the topic up outright. It was a point of disagreement, but only because I'd handled it badly in the past.

When we broke up she got really skinny which was good for her, now though she is like a small fucking car.

My current gf was kind of average, but only because she didn't buy food, didn't cook and never had any money. As our relationship developed and she stopped being a broke student she just started gaining weight steadily due to a normal preference for three meals a day plus a couple of snacks and a few alcoholic drinks and a dessert on the weekend.

Eventually we had to have a conversation and it was generic as shit. She got really angry. I tried to talk her down from her anger and redirect it from "I'm going to break up with you and you need to make sure there is NOT A PROBLEM AT ALL" to "I care about your health and wellness long term and want us to be healthier and happier TOGETHER".

Basically same shit. I stopped buying anything which wasn't proper food which required proper cooking like vegetables, meat, complex carbs etc, nothing that could be snacked or binge eaten and because she can't cook for shit she only ate what I cooked. She must have dropped 50lb within a year?

I hate myself for saying this, but people are kind of like children. If you lead by example and present a simple outcome they'll generally follow along because it makes sense, it is easy and you've done all the fucking work for them. If you try and force change expecting them to put effort and work to accommodate your request expect it to fail.

>>17932664
Man I tried the I want us to be healthy together argument but she just said I'm not obese and continued with her yelling about breaking up. Bitches are fucking crazy.

>>17932709
Yeah, but eventually the yelling about breaking up would have stopped and you've left her with the impression that is the matter ended. This is where you follow through on an outcome, break up with her if it is that big a deal to you. If it isn't, then continue to be with her, but shop, cook and eat clean. Politely refuse to indulge in bullshit food, get some regular exercise and remain motivated and consistent. She'll eventually get the message that change is coming one way or another.

Thing is, men can get away with eating more calories because we are usually taller and heavier than women. We might be more active anyway and even if we aren't we have a higher base metabolic rate because we have more muscle mass on average and less of us is water meaning we require more calories to sustain even when resting.

So if you both eat the same, I'd expect her to gain weight over time. It might seem unfair, but she really should be eating 20% smaller portions than you to maintain weight.

>>17932748
Solid advice and I wish I had used my head back then. Though she recently started to count calories and is eating like 1.5k to 1.7k a day without touching stuff like chips anymore. I'm glad she realized on her own she has to do something because I frankly had no idea how to bring tjat topic up again. If it won't work out or she starts slacking I'll use what you said though.

>>17931827
I think she's at 175 nowadays. 5'6" or so

>>17933019
Damn dude

Poke her belly

>>17931700
You can't do anything without her wanting to as well.

I've been this girl. I never got fat per se, but most of my muscles turned to fat, and I went from being slim and athletic to kind of curvy, partly to do with the pill (is she on the pill? It can have that effect). My boyfriend even liked it, but I didn't and it took a while but I got better.

My boyfriend saying something would just have made it worse. There's no way to do it nicely, unless she wants to.

It's really up to you whether you feel you can tolerate it or not. Personal fitness is personal motivation.

I really would see if she's on the pill though. It can make you crave sugar like crazy, and you lose self control.

>>17933019
Yeesh.
I know what you should do, break up with her immediately. That way, she can meet someone who isn't a shallow asshole. Those proportions do not an overweight person make.

>>17934550
Attraction matters though, and if he doesn't find her attractive it's going to suck in the future

>>17934543
You can ask of your partner to br healthy and not eat like a pig. I'm not saying become a gym rat or even go to the gym at all but don't let yourself go. If she has an issue with me I expect her to say something because that stuff breeds resentment otherwise. But no, women can't handle not eating 4 meals and a bag of chips a day.

>>17934578
I'm just saying it'll really strain the relationship if he does. I think people should be able to say as much. But real change is not going to happen unless she wants to as well. That's what I meant.

>>17934585
I agree with that. But so many women have a complete breakdown and say they are going to breakup it just makes no sense to me.

>>17934594
Women are just really sensitive about appearance. I am not, but it's taken a lot of time to get to that point, and any criticism is met with tears by most girls.

Reality is, with all the 'body positivisty' stuff, people don't actually want to look good by societies standards anymore, and men just seem to have to suck it up.

Makes me feel like I've wasted my time a bit trying to make myself look good and develop my own style that I like and feel attractive in. I could have just blamed everyone else for not finding my fat attractive and been vindicated by the media

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You will never be in a long lasting, fulfilling relationship.

You will die alone.

Its less the fat and more the complete lack of self control that comes with it.

Fuck her folds

>>17934684

Nigga, I'm telling you right now, once that pussy gets loose, you got like 12 folds to replace it, stop being such a self conscious cunt and fuck her folds

Nothing you can do cause being sex is totally okay now XDdddddd