becoming vacant

>>17871058
It seems to me like you at least partially want this to happen. Stop that. Being lonely doesn't make you deep or more interesting to anyone except yourself, and even then that just makes you pretentious as all hell. If you actually don't know how to say the words you're thinking in your head out loud, consider seeing a doctor or psychiatrist. If you don't want to do that just take pride in what you say by having confidence in yourself. Not faked confidence, but the kind that comes from actually knowing what you're doing is the best thing to do.

>>17871066
it's not really that i don't know how to say what i want to say but more that i end up dismissing them as dumb
how can i build confidence?

>>17871086
Never listen to the fake it till you make it advice. That creates a really hollow kind of confidence and if everything goes according to plan you convince yourself of a lie. You know what the best thing for you to do is, so do that. Whether it's working harder at your job, getting on a good sleep schedule, keeping up good hygiene, things like that. Once you're good at what you do and unashamed of all of your actions and habits you'll be a lot more confident. Also, never dismiss anyone. If you try to dumb things down people will either catch onto it and feel offended or, ironically, assume you're dumb. If you talk about complex things people will see you as a complex individual.

>>17871086
Also, I should mention that another huge part of confidence is being brave and staying positive. Assume the best outcome of any situation, never be afraid to say what you mean, and don't let anything intimidate you.

>you convince yourself of a lie
Yes. This is what you have to do to affect mental change in yourself. It's neuroplasticity. You have to train yourself to adopt the thought patterns you desire by actively behaving according to those thought patterns.

>>17871114
But too many people take the fake it till you make it advice and assume it's only in the mind, and nothing in the behavior. They try to shape their mindset to their behaviors instead of their behaviors to their mindset. It's a bit better to work on behavior first, and let mindset follow, from my experience.

>>17871123
Wat? That doesn't even make sense.

>>17871058
I'd say go see your GP, not a doctor but it seems like you have clinical depression.

Doctors in general are not judgemental, they'll listen to your issue.

>>17871123
Sorry, sometimes I can be a little off when I'm tired. Basically, when a lot of people try the fake it till you make it advice, if they're like me, assume that you just need to think you're confident and act that way and it will work. It really doesn't if you know what you're trying to do. You need to actually be the type of person who "deserves" to be confident, so to speak. Someone who does everything in a way that's admirable. Someone who is good at what they do and really doesn't have anything to be ashamed of, and to be that type of person requires several behavioral changes. At least, that's what worked for me, while the fake it till you make it advice just left me feeling really empty no matter how good of a facade I kept up, which I guessed wouldn't be good for someone who feels like they're becoming more and more vacant