Hey unattractive people, especially unattractive girls, how have

>>17870601
It's probably not as bad as your mind is making it. That's how it is for me at least. Looking in the mirror makes me shudder but I have no problem talking with attractive females and I've even had relationships with a couple. When it's something you think about every day the seriousness of it becomes less intense and you can function somewhat normally

>>17870601
Ive been rated as a 6/10 if that helps. Im male also. I have bad cavities on my front teeth, but i smile in a way that hides them so im not sure if people notice.

Just realize that youre a living breathing human and being alive is truly a gift. So what if you're ugly? That shouldn't stop you from enjoying life

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>>17870601
Are you a girl or a guy OP? And why do you think you unattractive?

>>17870609
I avoid mirrors if I can, if I look too long I start crying lol. I do really think about it every day, except when I forget about it like I said. I guess that doesnt make a lot of sense..

>>17870610
Thats the kind of mindset I try to give myself, and it works sometimes, but uhg it never lasts. I start to think about how much better life would be if I was a different person.

>>17870612
Girl, and various reasons. Facial features, weight, body shape, weird habits, you name it.

>5/10 in good lighting and still pick up people that are 9 and 10
Act confident OP. Even if you're not, act like you are. Most people are attracted to strong individuals who don't have complexes. Accentuate the features you do like and don't worry about the rest. Make people think that you're overflowing with alpha vibes. I pretend like I'm a sleezy car salesman every time I talk to attractive people and 3/5 times the charm works.
If you're talking about picking people up specifically, use the basics. Eye contact, mimic their behavior, play with your hair if you're a girl, laugh at the shit they say, make them laugh, make very light physical contact (touch their arm or hand briefly, don't linger unless you feel like there's a vibe), hang on their every word.

I'm fat bald and ugly but I still get cute gfs

>>17870650
Well I have a boyfriend, so I don't suppose I need to act all flirty. And I mostly do act more confidant than I really am because thats sort of the only way I can get through the day without completely emotionally deflating, but I feel like I just end up giving off a creepy gross vibe or something.

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>>17870634
Right, Weight and body shape you can do something about, as can weird habits. You need to choose one ( just one) and decide right, in the next six months i will fix/loose whatever. I would go on weight.

>>17870601
OP, you need to realise that it doesn't matter if you're attractive or not. You're a human being, and there's so much more to that than your looks.

If you cured cancer, do you think anyone would care if you were good-looking or not? Obviously that's an extreme, but the important thing is to do good and try to live a virtuous life. Then, if you attract someone, it'll be because they're attracted to your kind heart. Wouldn't you rather be with someone who's attracted to kind hearts, rather than long legs?

Also, we have a saying here: "A smile is cheaper than a facelift."

>>17870696
Of course I've tried, my whole life in fact. In my recent efforts, I became vegan and then vegetarian over the last year. I gained 10 pounds, had my gallbladder removed, stopped eating, lost 30 pounds, started eating again because of stress, and gained 15 back. Now im here, battling to stay under my original weight.
Theres more to it but I don't want to give you a wall of text about my abnormal eating habit. I am aware this all sounds like an excuse, and I suppose it is in a way, but I promise I have tried.

Okay, so you're supposedly unattractive. That's not going to change, so why dwell on it?

>>17870601
Honestly I recognized I was physically unappealing and that to feel better about myself I'd need to change by exercising and trying to eat better. You may not be able to change ugly genetics like bad bone structure, height, or whatever but you can still lose weight and get more toned so you view yourself in a better light.

Bump! Everyone Bump!

>>17870708
I admire your optimism, thank you. I suppose the people in my life would have to like me for my personality, or what little I have of one, because thats all I have to offer, haha. I have an underlying fear that my personality is what got me my boyfriend, but I don't have the looks to keep him around too long, especially since he knows so many beautiful women. Somtimes I feel like I'm just a sad potato person, holding onto his leg for dear life lmao

There are some things reality allows me to do and there are some things reality prevents me from doing. I focus on the former because there is no use in dwelling on the latter.

>>17870731
Because its shitty and I secretly love feeling awful or something

>>17870708

wat do if ugly smile

>>17870752
And here i thought girls wanted to be liked for "who they are" and not for how they look. At least that's what i've been told.

>Somtimes I feel like I'm just a sad potato person, holding onto his leg for dear life
I think your boyfriend like you for your sense of humor, because this made me smile.

>Somtimes I feel like I'm just a sad potato person, holding onto his leg for dear life lmao
This made me laugh.

>I suppose the people in my life would have to like me for my personality, or what little I have of one, because thats all I have to offer, haha. I have an underlying fear that my personality is what got me my boyfriend, but I don't have the looks to keep him around too long, especially since he knows so many beautiful women.
This is the kind of attitude that'll drive him away. Cool, fun women are attractive.

Also, you're thinking of things in reverse. Men are initially attracted to a woman because of her looks, then the effect of her looks wears off, and they stay for her personality.

>>17870770
A happy heart is never ugly, though.

i know a lot of couples in my line of work.
and if i've learned one thing from that
it's the fact that there is really someone for everyone. honest, there is someone out there that adores you.
it really taught me to not be so judgmental
at first i was like, how in the world did this guy get a girl like her, he must have money or something. nope, she's seriously attracted to him, and he's hideous. this is just one example of hundreds. what one person thinks is beauty, someone else thinks is ugly and vice versa.

i hope you find that person, and learn to accept yourself

>>17870708

I'm glad it made you laugh.
I can't really help it though, its how I think of myself. I actually think a lot worse, but try to disguise it with jokes to make it a little less uncomfortable for everyone else. I am also aware that this will drive him away, and it is terrifying. How I have managed to keep him for 4 years so far is beyond my comprehension.

I know thats the usual order of things but since I am a walking pile of turds, maybe my situation is reversed?

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>>17870794

Thank you anon, this made me feel a little better. I hope you find your person and happiness also.

>>17870831
>I'm glad it made you laugh
I wasn't laughing at you, I just thought you worded it well.

Look, it's this simple - you seem to have a reasonably sweet deal right now with your boyfriend. You like him, by all accounts, you've been together for 4 years, and he doesn't seem to be raising any doubts about the relationship. You could ride out the good times, or you could nitpick and project your insecurities onto him, treat him like a philanderer and sour everything until it all falls apart. Your choice.

>>17870845
I know, I didn't take it personally or anything. I like to make people laugh.

You are 100% right. It is a sweet deal, I have this super hot boy all to myself that I love more than anything in the world. We have a long and complicated history, but I suppose he has to see something in me to stay around so long. I forgot to mention it, but I have tried to keep quiet about my self loathing because I know how uncomfortable and pointless it is for others to hear about. It really only usually comes out when I'm drunk lately.

Funny story,
A few weeks ago I was having a great time at my friends house, drinking it up and playing mario party. Unfortunately though, after everyone else went to bed, I started getting really shitty thoughts and had to go cry in the bathroom. I guess my boyfriend had noticed I'd been gone for a while and came to check on me. Long story short, he thought I wanted to break up with him when I was having a mental break down over how I wasn't good enough for him and we ended up hugging and crying together for like 30 minutes

>>17870601
>>>/fit/

It helps.

>>17870940

I've gone there before, theyre too mean for me lmao. Though I suppose I could go ask for some advice with a vegetarian diet

>>17870957
How can you be easily offended and still come here? Seriously, how can someone be this new and this dumb?

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>>17870601

Stop living in the world where you compare yourself to everyone else.

Some people are smarter, faster, more creative, better looking, whatever. Your average person isn't attractive, yet somehow they manage to find love and find a way to be fulfilled. We all deal with it. We all get up every day and deal with other people having things we don't.

I can guarantee you that at any given time you care more about your looks than anyone else. Be an excellent person.

You won't get the 10/10, no. You won't get the super model or the hot girl at the gym. Thats the reality. The other reality is that the only person stopping you from being happy is you.

The fact that you are a literate first-world individual with the luxury of eating everyday and having access to an internet connection makes you better off than 70% of the world so count your fucking blessings and do the best with what you have.

You're stuck with yourself. Learn to deal with it and do your best or let it drag you down and spend your whole life feeling sorry for yourself. The choice is yours.

>>17870961
Not new and not easily offended, I just prefer boards that are generally nicer with their advice.

>>17870973
I do my best with what I have been given and worked for. You're right, I should stop feeling sorry for myself. I think I have depression or something, I dunno

>>17870989

>I think I have depression or something, I dunno

Then fix it. I don't mean to be too harsh but I also don't want to coddle you through this process of accepting your shortcomings and limitations.

Everyone is lacking something, you know? Believe it or not, some attractive people look at videos of people playing the piano and wish they had musical talent. Some incredible athletes wish they could sing. Some ugly people wish they looked better. Some rocket scientists wish they could dance.

The list goes on and on. In the long run people will judge you far more harshly for not utilizing the characteristics you do have. At the very least you should strive to be someone who is passionate and respected. Those traits shine far much brighter than you think.

At the very least you should internalize the fact that attractive or not, no one wants to be around your pity party. Insecurity and self deprecations are universal turn offs.

>I'd like to hate myself less, but still have a realistic perception

Everything is subjective, we all tell ourselves a story that we use to locate ourselves in the world. If your story is "Fuck I'm as ugly as sin" then that is applied to everything you do.

Attractive people don't walk around thinking "I'm so attractive, therefore I really love myself and my life is perfect", I've met plenty of attractive people that have shit confidence, or terrible personality traits, which completely limit their lives in a huge number of ways. We all know that person that seems to be as happy as fuck, completely ignorant of their actions and their reality.

Basically, the visual/superficial side is a distraction from the real issue, which is your inside. You can be attractive or ugly and you can feel attractive or ugly, and hands down the person with the better life is the person that feels attractive regardless. Look deeper, we invent distractions in order to cope with and understand the world. Often we find a label and use that to solidify our state;

I'm ugly so I hate myself
I'm a virgin so I hate myself
I'm lonely so I hate myself
I'm unhappy in a relationship so I hate myself

These things aren't related, but we phrase them that way. As soon as you realise that the problem is centred on self-hatred, or a lack of love/empathy for yourself, the excuses disappear. That's what you need to work on.

>>17871004
This is what I needed to hear. Thank you so much.
Thank you to everyone in this thread for all of the constructive criticism and advice. Ill do my best to take it in and run with it.

>We all know that person that seems to be as happy as fuck, completely ignorant of their actions and their reality.
I don't. The people i know that seem happy also seem to be very aware of their actions and reality.

Look at it this way. Anyone who likes you, anyone who spends any amount of time with you at all, or anyone who has never done so in the past, likes to be around you purely because of who you are. You're character and how you make them feel. They have been nearly 100% genuine with you and you can be sure of that 24 hours a day. An attractive person will never have that piece of mind, because a lot of people only like to be around attractive people for superficial reasons.

>>17870634
If you can get your BMI below 19 your self-esteem and social+romantic prospects will dramatically improve. It only takes a few months to about a year max. Just eat fewer calories, and more vegetables to feel full, and don't drink anything with calories (use calcium supplements). A pound of fat loss is 3000 calories skipped or burned.

>>17870723
Stop making excuses. It is literally just a function of how many calories you eat and how many you burn. Many studies have shown that fat people simply lie about how much they eat or undercount calories. Fix your obesity if you want to have self-respect and good health.

>>17871079
>You're character
wat

>a lot of people only like to be around attractive people for superficial reasons
boo hoo

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>>17870601
I'm really unattractive and I take all sorts of personality and appearance quirks that I use to define myself since there's nothing in terms of looks, so I make it seem like being ugly as fuck is actually MY CHOICE.
Though I know for sure that it's mostly in my mind (everyone keep saying I look OK or even cute) I can't change the way I think about myself. I have an odd love-hate relationship with myself in which I know I'm ugly and undesirable and at the same time, I feel like nobody ever deserved to love me because of how great I am.

I realize I'm probably mentally ill and cripplingly depressive as well but the fear of confirmation stops me from seeking out help. I also seem to have developed some sort of fear of attachment. Not of rejection because I know everyone, even the ugliest person, can get a bf/gf if they're willing to work on themselves and better themselves. But I fear of getting too attached to someone and getting disappointed, or someone else getting too attached to me and getting disappointed (happened when I used to play WOW, a guy literally threatened with suicide because I didn't wanna be his online gf)