Improving as a man

Do something that gives you confidence. Like taking some martial arts class, I don't know. Start asserting yourself in small ways like speaking first if someone asks who wants donuts. Say hello to people first. Then it gets easier.

>>17860209
>There has to be a way to increase my general presence

There is. It's called "Improving". Once you become a stronger, more experienced person, the confidence will be an afterthought. So get experience, try, learn, and eventually you'll be really a more capable person.

>>17860209
Go to gym, seeing your body become stronger will help your self esteem and make you feel healthier. But this will not fix your personality on its own but it will help.

>>17860216
>Start asserting yourself in small ways like speaking first if someone asks who wants donuts

I always felt like in those situations not to jump first or I feel selfish

>So get experience, try, learn, and eventually you'll be really a more capable person

Dumb question but where do I start??

>>17860275
>Dumb question but where do I start??

Anywhere. In class. At the bus stop. When at the supermarket. When going out.

>>17860275
To be respected you have to be selfish a lot I learned that way too late in life but I would never go back to the old way fuck letting others go first what has it ever gotten you? In life you have to look out for yourself bc no one will do it for you

>>17860291
OP here and I have a little story about this. Recently at work my boss is trying to move me into another department because he thinks I call out too much, I had bronchitis for a week and a half then my car broke down for a day. Anyway I was gonna go talk to my union rep about things and force him to make me stay then find a new job. Along the way tho I thought to myself "oh if I do this my boss wont like me anymore, ive been here for a year and blah blah blah" but it hit me along the way, why would I care about something if he doesn't why would I get stepped on just because of a false concept of being on good terms with him. I won't see this man again in my life, and if I do fuck him. This is mainly how the idea for this thread started, I opened my eyes that I am too nice to people that truly mean nothing to me in the long run and should only respect and care about what the people I care about think of me.

>>17860291
>To be respected you have to be selfish

>>17860209
OP, it's not like that. Self respect comes from confidence and real skills/knowledge. Being selfish and being confident look similar, but they are not the same. You have to be able to put yourself over others sometimes, but you also have to be able to offer something to be respected.

>>17860314
Yea I know that much, I won't just walk over everyone but I won't let people walk over me anymore

>>17860275
Just a small warning that trying to becoming more assertive is a fragile endeavour to embark on. There's a high possibility of coming out more unstable and vigilant than ever intended. Granted it might be worth this unstableness once it settles down and you find yourself on the other end, more assertive (as you requested) But it might be an unnecessary overdoing.

I would highly recommend checking out RSD Alex's old stuff. He's motto is that every guy in this world is "of value" not "high value" or "alpha". A really great way of seeing things in my opinion.

There's an old torrent with all of his deleted content which includes audio only versions.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G4LH_h8TbXE

>>17860333
bookmarked ;)