Need Help Just got kicked out of College today

attendance gradually got worst. i transferred to a new school a year ago and tryied going to class events took place that put me into a deeper depressive state. ultimatley this last semester i didnt go to a single one my classes but didnt drop them so my parents wouldnt find out. pretty much so my dad wouldnt know

Why didn't you seek help for your depression earlier? Clearly,wishing it would get better by doing nothing, was working great

well i went to therapy for abut two months when it got at its worst. but like a month ago i just stopped. idk. and i have just been shut down. isolated. and then today i got the email telling me i was dismissed. probably going to appeal but for what

idk for a long time it just kind of felt like i deserved to feel shitty.

blaming my problems on depression just feels kind of weak to me, i dont want it to be an excuse

So have you seen a paychiatrist? A lot of people with depression need meds along with therapy. Your brain flipped a shit switch and is betraying you, it's not your fault but you need to get up.

You can't let this go on.

honestly scared to take meds because it has fucked with a few people and family members i know.

>>17853587
Well I know it is scary but you gotta take all the help you can get. Like I said, moping around doing nothing is clearly doing jack shit, so what do you expect to happen if you don't go down all avenues of help?

It's going to take a while before you find the right meds. You might feel violent and hateful. But you will get better. I was like you. Failin out of college. I got meds and help. Now I have a 4.0 gpa and I'm graduating this year. You can do it.

>>17853587
Clearly you're not scared to waste tens of thousands of dollars of your dad's money though, right?

>>17853605
i think one of my main inhibitors is that i smoke so much fucking weed to just basically not care about anything. today just getting that email kind of like shocked me. first thing i did was smoke which i want to stop btw and then stumbled upon adv

>>17853606
no because he beat the shit out of my mother, sister and i for years. he cares about his job and not his family. he makes around $500k a year so he can lick my nutsack

>>17853645
>it's OK to lie and steal because my dad is a jerk!
Great attitude you got there.

>>17853653
nah i dont think its right of me at all. I dont like ake pride in it. He deserves bad things to happen to him tho and all he cares about money so it is what it is

>>17853631
Dude just stop fucking up. Stop smoking weed it's clearly not helping you. I don't care if your dad was abusive, he's the one who's paying for your shit right now so either figure something else out or beg him.

You're trying to hide from your problems and you're only making it worse. You can leave your head in the sand until shit gets nuclear or you can wake the fuck up and do something about it.

>>17853667
ya but that what im saying man... i feel like im at the fucking nuclear tipping point. i havent talked to my parents about any of this shit because my mom is fucking brainwashed by him and is in like fucking lolli world. she keeps trying to tell me how hes changed and hows hes better and shit but if i ever try to talk to her about the abuse she denys it ever happened. I straight up watched him chocke her until she was like ghostly white and her eyes having like a dead look over that. but like my mom is happy and shes always helped and protected me so i feel bad like breaking the reality to her of him fucking me up so bad mentally that it fucked with my school.

like the kind of dick my father is: im a lifelong die hard carolina panthers fan. he got tickets for free through work to last years super bowl. my mom made him invite me. basically night before the game we went into san fran to the superbowl village shit and whatever happened and he got drunk started yelling all this obscene shit. met up with my gfs gay uncle and bf who are very nice and send me care packages. and were talking to them and my dad said im done talking to these faggots they make me sick. basically followed them to their hotel calling them faggots and shit. then later on when we got back to our hotel he ripped up the tickets and told me to go fuck my faggot friends lol. so i had to watch he panthers lose in my hotel lobby. nonetheless this guy never gets negative consequences and he deserves to burn in hell.

Look I know your life was shitty. I'm sorry about that. But you can't let that be your excuse to fuck up anymore. Do you think your landlord will care that daddy fucked mommy up when youcan't pay rent and you're hungry? Do you think your school will care, if you haven't demonstrated any willingness to get help and keep getting help? They will help you but not if you're a lost cause. You have no excuses anymore.

>>17853687
The best thing you can do is do right for yourself. I flunked out my first semester, flunked out two years later, moved out worked decent paying but shit jobs. It was fun for awhile but let me tell you, it's not fun making shit money, watching your peers pass you by, and not having as many opportunities.

You can either feel sorry for yourself, or you can do right for yourself. I'm 27 now, but just finished a great semester and graduating next Summer. It feels way better than moping around smoking I'll tell you that much.

The best revenge is to live a good life. College will be done before you know it. Just get it done. This is future you telling you to get your shit together.

>>17853733
i wish i could give you a fistbump dude. i appreciate the advice.

Who is paying for your housing, food, and drug addiction? If the answer to any of those is "my dad" what are you going to do once he cuts you off?

Because that day is likely quite soon.

>>17853733
idk i just dont know where to go from here. obviously i have to appeal to my school but like will they actually empathize with my situation? i feel like they will just think im a pussy who didnt care.

>>17853750
Advice is worthless if not acted on though. Make sure you're going for a degree thats in demand, aka a STEM degree. Do the minimum to get an A, and unless you are doing something crazy like Aerospace Engineering you'd be surprised how little work it takes. Go to every class, take notes, do your homework, and your almost at an A there as long as you cram and so well on the test.

Get it done anon.

>>17853758
i work as a server like 4 nights a week and make around $600 a month. my rent and utilities all together are like $425. i live with my gf and two other roommates. my mom works and gives me money to help me out because my dad doesnt.

>>17853765
Trust me they've seen a hundred kids just like you. I had to appeal several times and be on probation. Be humble, respectful, and you'll be fine. At the end of the day they are still a business and they want your money.

>>17853758
my dad only pays for my tuition. but my mom is the one who does it through the joint banking account

>>17853771
>Make sure you're going for a degree thats in demand, aka a STEM degree
Terrible advice, the world doesn't need more waste of space stem majors who have no passion for the field and are only there because they heard it will get them a job.

Oh and btw aerospace engineering has been a shrinking field for over 30 years.

>>17853779
that true. we pay full tuition as i dont have any scholarship or government money so i feel like that would matter to them right?

>>17853785
At the end of the day you still want a marketable degree. STEM is pretty broad and surely he can find something in their that interests him. Life isn't a fairy tale where everyone follows their passion and makes bank. I finally settled on a choice, Information Systems. It's not a passion, but I've grown to enjoy it and it's an in demand degree. Lots of internships for it as well which I'm also doing. Good pay too.

>>17853791
You'll still be on some form of Academic Probabtion. You'll have to meet with student retention and get advised. Go take care of all this tomorrow by the way so you don't have to stress about it as next semester comes up.

>>17853805
Should I get some kind of referral from my therapist for the appeal or do I not need it?

>>17853816
Uh yea I had to have a referral from someone. It's basically a character witness thing. If it's anything like my probation process I had to appeal which meant I had to write a short paper explaining my situation, how I plan to improve etc etc. Google college academic appeal for examples and then the reference talked about above. I wouldn't mention drugs, just tell them what's been up. They just want to see you are trying to improve.

>>17853837
Ya so I texted my therapist and I'm going to see him tomorrow morning at 9 am. So it's a start I guess. I know what to do for school just don't know what to do about the parentals at this point.

>>17853791
Smoke fucking weeeeeeeeddddddddd you retard! Fuck man... SEXUALLY! Oh my God.

>>17853894
Wut lol

>>17853878
Just be honest. It's going to suck either way. Part of being an adult is admitting when you fucked up and trying to fix your mistakes. Don't be like me and wait years to do that, its just wasted time.

>>17853930
Thanks for the advice anon

>>17853997
No problem, make me, your family, but most importantly yourself proud. Get that degree, get a good job, and help out another anon someday.

>>17853997

I just went through the process of appealing a few years back, I even fucked up my appeal and went from academic probation to failing again.

They literally let me appeal a second time to get back on academic probation even after I screwed it up. All this without any cause shown/etc.

Just have a sob story, it's easy as fuck. You will literally have no trouble getting signed up for your classes. You can probably go straight from the appeal to the advisor to get your classes signed up for.