ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

To all women:
Got to know a woman from okcupid (two weeks ago), we haven't met but I like her and it seems, she like me too. She messages me a lot and also sends/sent me photos from her current vacation. After a while I mentioned the fact I was born in soviet union (she in germany) and I don't really know, it seems like something changed. At first the amount of texts was the same, but reduced then. On the vacation she had an dress (for an event on an evening) and I asked her to show it. After she *just sent a photo of the dress* laying on the bed, I ask also for one in which she wears it. Now it's almost two days since we texted (actually this happened already twice: Once she was busy and another time when she drove to her vacation).
Women: Did I fucked up? Might it be because she doesn't want an not-in-germany-born? Should I ask her if me asking her in the dress was a mistake?

>>17852997
Most likely she just found someone else more interesting.

These types of questions come up a lot, is it so common for men to be this invested in mere texting?

>>17853100
So should I just let it go, without any messages? What if I'm interpreting it wrong?
>be this invested in mere texting?
Well, she already wanted to meet up but I hadn't time and a few days later she was on her way to her vacation.
I don't want to spend too much time on texting and want actually to meet her, that's the best way to get to know each other.

>>17853113
In this specific case, you could text her once she's back about meeting up. If she refuses or makes up another excuse, then yes, just let go.

yeah so this guy I'm dating suggested me to go to the lingerie shop so he could buy me any lingerie I want. He likes that kind of stuff on me (stockings, for example). It's an odd situation for me though. I haven't had such bf who will buy me stuff in shop, especially intimate ones. I don't know how to act. Girls, I'd like your girly advice.

>>17853135
It's not very different from choosing jewelry. Shopping for lingerie together can be quite fun. There's nothing kinky about it, you can't try sexy pieces on, so it's just picking stuff you both think will look cute. Choose a shop that has specifically cute/sexy lingerie instead of basics, and the shop staff will be more than used to couples shopping together as well.

>>17853135
as a guy: depends on a guy. If he was honest, then maybe he just likes to see you in sexy clothes. Maybe he also wants to know which ones will fit you best and it possibly will make him horny (right there and at home).
What about you? Do you want to be sexy for him, do you want to make him excited? Maybe take this as an advice and think about (in terms of how to act) how you could make this event as enjoyable for you both as possible.

>PG will never trust you
;_;

>>17853134
should I mention the fact she hasn't texted me back or it is better to ask directly about a meeting? What message would a woman prefer?

>>17853173

Just ask about the meeting. If you mention the lack of response, she'll be on the defensive immediately.

>>17853173
If you mention the unreplied text, it might feel like you're accusing her of something. I would recommend against it.
Perhaps you could try something along the lines of "Hey, now that you're back, how about we (grab some coffee or whatever)? I know we haven't spoken that much recently, but I was hoping we could make up for that in person."

How do you think that would suit you?

>>17853183
hm, okay

>>17853186
>How do you think that would suit you?
Well, I like the first sentence. The second sentence doesn't really fit (or I'm wrong and it is common to text very much/often in a only ~2 weeks of "knowin" each other). I'll think about another second sentence. But thanks! :)

>>17853168
You're such a creep. Every bit of info that you have shared about yourself is repulsive.

>>17853213
>creep
You're the one stalking me.

Girls:
Would you say giving someone massages is erotic?

I have a crush on this girl, we chat a lot through text and train together, we banter about giving eachother massage and ive given her massages twice.

Please dont autism-shame me, I have never been in a relationship and I have been focusing on work and my sport through my late teens and early 20s so I have almost no experience.

Male anon here, females what are some common things that guys do wrong in terms of building a potential relationship with girls?

Back story: I've met over a dozen different women this year that made me want to persue, but it seems like every situation, I have never been able to take it further. I ask out a girl on a date, and they either have plans and don't seem like they want to reschedule, or conversations typically wane after the first couple of times and they become interested in someone else even before I get a date. At this point I just feel like I'm a stepping stone of sorts. I get that sometimes things don't work out but the issue must be on my end if I've struck out so many times.

What are some things I could be doing wrong? (For what it's worth I make over 100k a year, I run, lift and swim regularly, my hobbies are cooking, music and travelling. I'm decent looking and I also volunteer working with special needs children.)

>>17853253
>Would you say giving someone massages is erotic?

Only if somebody or everybody involved is fully naked.

>>17853257
Gotcha ;-;

>>17853253
They can be and they can not be. It's very particular to the context of each relationship. I would think something of getting massages from guy friends, but that's because I'm not intimate enough to regularly touch these friends and have it feel comfortable.
How do you feel when you give her these massages? Do you have erotic thoughts?

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What's the soonest you should ever tell each other "i love you."

>>17853256
>For what it's worth I make over 100k a year,

I'm a man, but, you know, I can offer something from this side. Literally the first thing about yourself you write is your income. That sounds shallow.

If girls lose interest so fast maybe that's a good place to start. Don't be so shallow that she can explore the depths of you in a couple of dates.

>>17853256
>what are some common things that guys do wrong in terms of building a potential relationship with girls?
Too many to list. It really ranges from being unattractive to be a shit human being.

>What are some things I could be doing wrong?
How the fuck are we supposed to know?

>>17853273
Different for everyone

But i'd say wait a few months after you've been dating and seeing each other a bit.

>>17853273
After 6 months you know each other.
If someone tells me before that, I just get freaked out and leave.

>>17853256
You seem to have a nice list of qualities, but these things don't define a personality. You might just be boring.

>>17853271
Do I have erotic thoughts giving my crush that ive known less than 2 months massages? Yes.

We're going to a party together on friday and I want to know if theres any point in trying to take this further. Right now its in that will we wont we state and none of us have made any kind of move besides finding excuses to train together and for me to massage her etc. I really really like this girl, shes intelligent, her personality is awesome and she has a passion for the sport I love.

>>17853256

It doesn't sound like there's anything specific "wrong" with you, so it's issue must be either that you either are boring or come off as boring. The trick in the beginning is to arouse interest, something about you has to be the hook that makes them want to get to know you better. People who are eloquent, witty or funny have it easier at this point because they can have interesting conversations easier, but really it's just about finding a girl who finds you and what you say to them in particular interesting.

>>17853253
Not a girl, but depends on how the massage goes. If you want to test your limits, try giving a massage that goes very close to her erotic zones: ribcage just under boobs, back of the leg up to just before the buttocks, front of the leg until pussy height, and so on. Always make moves that clearly show you're not going to touch her there, but also clearly show that you're going as close as possible without doing so.

>>17853282
If she's going out of her way to get the train with you and asking for massages, make a move on her. She seems to like you. Worst that can happen is finding out she isn't, which is not the end of the world

>>17853282
It seems you're more interested in touching her than she is in touching you. Perhaps cool it a bit with the massage offerings. If she asks about, obviously comply, it's definitely a great sign, but if she never asks for it again, you have a good indicator that she was probably not enjoying it as much as you were.

>>17853287
These are massages in public pretty much, at the place we train, mostly for her back that gets pretty stiff.

>>17853293
Thats what I thought.

We're going to be at a party together on friday. Maybe I'll get a chance to make a move.

Why would a guy be so desperate to keep a girl sometimes?

My boyfriend is really handsome, has money and friends, has really good reputation, and has banged a ton of chicks. He has a lot going for him.

I don't have much going for me, my self esteem is low in comparison. I lost my virginity to him at age 23. I have anxiety, I'm needy, I'm insecure and a lot to handle. I struggle with anger issues and sometimes lash out at him. I have broken up with him several times because of this and because I didn't feel like I could make him happy, and feeling unappreciated too sometimes. He doesn't always show affection to me. However, when I pull away and want to break up, he will spend hours and write a ton of paragraphs about how he wants me to stay and eventually he convinces me. What is going on in his head?

>>17853280
>these things don't define a personality
could you go into more details?

>>17853300
Love?

You think its some meme? You're wrong.

>>17853300
>, and feeling unappreciated too sometimes. He doesn't always show affection to me.

This is the part that worries me. Abusers like people with low self-esteem, and will play nice only long enough to make sure their partner doesn't leave them.

Your situation sounds like that. Maybe it would be good for both of you to be apart for a while.

>>17853273
When it "feels right" or when "it's about damn time", whichever comes first.

>>17853305

Dude, does that really sound like "love" to you?

>>17853311
This is what worries me too.. I sometimes wonder if I'm a victim of something and I'm unaware of it.

>>17853302
Things I notice beside the classic resume you posted are manners, way of speaking, general body languague, responses to various situations. The problem is that there's no recipe for a perfect attitude and personality. You're the only one who might be able to evaluate if maybe there's something off-putting about your general behavior that might give them a bad impression of you.

>>17853314
Is it not? I can't tell because I haven't been loved much in my life. Although he does do some nice things for me like pay for stuff.

>>17853315

Abuse is not only physical. Emotional abuse is a thing too. IF you really have your self-esteem so low, it might be thanks (or at least helped) by your relationship.

Oh, but before you leave him or something (if you decide to do it, of course) find a few people to support you. Friends, family, someone to have your back.

>>17853274
I don't mean to come off as shallow, but please believe me when I say that I've never been called that by anyone. I was just making an implication that for a guy in my 20s, I make an income that is above average and that I am financially responsible with good credit, a house and a nice car. I have financial stability and security

>>17853280
>>17853283
Yeah, I fear this might be the case; I don't believe I'm boring, but I typically come off quiet and don't share a whole lot about myself unless asked first. What are some things I can do to appear less boring?

The arousing interest thing is something I tried most recently. A new girl in one of my friend groups brought up self defense and the topic led to me as everyone was asking about boxing which is something I've done for years. She seemed interested in knowing more so we got talking, but she said I was "cocky" (which I've never been called that before by anyone, most of my friends know I'm generally a quiet and humble guy) and started shifting interest into another guy who is even more introverted than I.

Just seems like whatever approach I take is the wrong one lol. I guess if I was just being myself it would have worked out favorably.

So idk I don't think I'm boring but I don't know how to come across interesting

>>17853321
I don't want to live my life being paranoid or overthinking though if this is how normal guys react... I just wonder why he seems to care more when I'm about to pull away. Im not even doing it on purpose for validation I promise but thats how he is.

>>17853324
It's always a challenge for introverts, there's unfortunately no right way to do it. Trial and error, I'm afraid, and each person is a new set of conditions.
I'm accutely aware of how I come off most of the time, and I still have a hard time fixing it.

>>17853317
>Is it not?

To me, it doesn't sound like love. I'm not him though, I'm not in his head.

>>17853325
>I don't want to live my life being paranoid or overthinking though if this is how normal guys react.

Same thing we tell guys here, but with the genders reversed: All "guys" don't share the same personality. There's no "normal" really.

But, focusing on keeping someone in a relationship that hurts them is not nice. Doesn't matter if he realizes it or not (not all abusers are geniuses with evil plans, some people just do).

So no, there are people out there that will give you love even when you don't try to pull away. You don't need to live like this if you don't want to. And again, don't do all this alone. Find people you trust.

>>17853297
Offer her a massage when you're in a more private place. Don't invite her though, first get her to said place, then offer the massage. Inviting for her will sound very creepy

Maybe, just maybe, kiss her neck just once, very softly, and ser how she reacts. If she gets mad just apologize and say you just felt like it. It can be awkward at the moment, but don't give her any massages after that. If she asks why, just say you feel awkward for the kiss. That's when she'll be very likely to spill the beans with a positive or negative reaction about it

Bitches luv neck kisses tho

>>17853334
Thank you...

>>17853324
>I was just making an implication that for a guy in my 20s, I make an income that is above average and that I am financially responsible with good credit, a house and a nice car. I have financial stability and security

Yeah, I get that. It's not like you started rambling about "all this 6's ignore me" and shit. There are really shallow guys here, and you are not one of them.

But a salary won't make you "interesting" for a date. You gotta talk, joke, listen, etc. It's a whole thing that's impossible to just describe. You gotta find your rhythm and that of the other person.

There's nothing wrong with striking out. As long as you don't give up or get bitter, it's just learning.

>>17853340

Don't worry, it gets better. I know people just say that, but I mean it. I've lived this first hand in my family, and with kids involved it's even harder, but my mom pulled through. So I really wish you the best of lucks.

>>17853336
Thanks, thats good advice.

Today she lingered at the place we train at close to me for a good 20minutes after the massage even though I know she has a busy life. We also exchange a bunch of eye contact and smiling so I'm overall optimistic about this whole thing.

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>Manage literally ALL MY COURAGE to ask a girl out
>Want to know where she lives so I can not get to her place like 45 minutes late

>"I'll let you know when the day comes, k?"

fuck fuck fuck fuck

>>17853371
>>Manage literally ALL MY COURAGE to ask a girl out

Why is that? Have you two spoken before? Hang out? Did you ask in person? How was it?

>>17853326
It's sad but true. I can also tell "wow they must think I'm bored I haven't said anything in awhile" and try to rectify it, but it feels extremely forced trying to be talkative all the time, almost like people know I'm being fake.

>>17853343
I'm not bitter or wanting to give up, but if anything I just feel a lot of self disappointment. I'm not trying to sound conceited here, but I feel like I have a lot of qualities and a foundation that some guys would love to have, but it makes me sad to not be able to put it all together and take advantage of the opportunities that are available.

>It's a whole thing that's impossible to just describe. You gotta find your rhythm and that of the other person

It's funny you say that, a close friend of mine was describing it like a dance or song. Almost 20 years of music experience and I can't find the right rhythm with another person lol

>>17853362
You're welcome bro

If there's all that eye contact and smiles, just kiss her right after she lowers her sight, when she brings it up again. Took me years to realize, but it's the perfect cue for a kiss, no questions asked

>>17853379
>I feel like I have a lot of qualities and a foundation that some guys would love to have

Doesn't matter what guys want, you wanna impress girls :P

The dance thing is pretty good. I don't use it because I'm an awful dancer. Try to see things from their perspective, try to get what you can do or what do they expect. Doesn't mean that you have to become what others want, just keep in mind what they expect.

>>17853378
We have spoken before and hung out. I asked her over text because we don't have many opportunities to talk.

As for how it went it seems like it went alright. We're supposed to go on Thursday but that reluctance to tell me brings some uncertain feels.

>>17853392
>>17853371
Also fuck I omitted an important part that she's a girl from my work place and that's why we don't have many opportunities to talk in real life.

>>17853273

i give myself a generous 8 months before i contemplate saying it

>>17853392

I'll assume the best here: She is just careful about reveling her address. Come Thursday you'll go out and it will be alright.

Just don't push the address thing if she doesn't want to tell you. Just go out and have fun.

Guys:
How did the girl you were hooking up with behave before she broke it off with you?

I asked my ex to mail me a thing he had that belongs to me. It's been two weeks.
Should I forget about it at this point?
May he be using that thing to "control" me?

>>17853563
what do you fear? Ask her again and if she still ignores it, you know what's up.

Guys
If a guy friend hits on or attempts to fuck you while you're clearly in a relationship is that disrespectful ?

>>17852983
My gf feels a little distant, were very much in love but both very busy so while I am certain there are no problems between us I Can't parse out what is actually the matter. she insists she's fine, just a little bit stressed so is that the truth and if so how can I help it?

>>17853608
I think so but it's an imperfect world. If you think it has have no hesitation to point that out to them and excuse yourself

>>17853608
Yep, it is from my point of view. Regardless if my friend is hitting on my girlfriend or a friend of my girlfriend. Of course implying this friend knows that you're in a relationship.

>>17853608
Well duh.

>>17853608
Yes

Girls and boys, I'll like to ask you both a question. Straight to the tl;dr: How common is nowadays for a girl to be "kinky" inclined? Last girl I dated was very into it and showed me things I ended up loving. And now that it's over im worried I might not find someone else like that...

Half a month ago I broke up with my girlfriend, we weren't definetely mean for each other, but we did had something that sure was solid as a rock: our sexual chemistry

I have never met a girl like her. So spontaneus and lewd. Those things really went along with me, I was as adventurous as she was. We were a bit of show off.
She was very kinky, very into being dominated. I never tried the dominant role, or things like spanking or being more rough and dammed: I felt so comfortable at it, like a true nature she helped me discover


Now that its over, of course there are way more things to look for in a new relationship, like maturity and love. But, that sexual connection we had... tell me, guys and girls of /soc/, is it really normal or for the opposite really rare, to meet a girl into those things? A freak, a kinky gal. Are those interest common, those traits (being a little showoff, not hold many boundaries, like the adventure) common, or for instance vanilla girls are more common?

Thanks in advance!

>>17853608
>>17853640
Even more: I would ask myself what kind of friend he is.

>>17853648
>showed me things I ended up loving
open for giving a few more details?

I think it may be more common rather than rarely.

>>17853648

It's more common nowadays, yes.

>FWB with a 53 year-old who calls me daddy ... I'm 26

>>17853608
I immediately stop talking to every male friend who crosses those boundaries.
Having no respect of my relationship is an immediate deal breaker.

>>17853648
It's pretty normal for most women to be submissive. There's a reason 50 Shades of Grey got so popular.

>>17853648
I've hooked up with 4 girls and 3 liked it, the other didn't know she liked it till we did that. Try it on more and mold them to it, start off slow and gauge the reaction

>>17853589
I asked him clearly to send me the thing. He was "ok, no problem".
Two weeks later and still nothing

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Boys and girls

If someone younger than you called you "kiddo", and you were attracted to them, would you see it as a term of endearment? Or sign of the zone?

She basically wished me a happy birthday yesterday, saying "happy birthday kiddo!!"
Most people here have said it's harmless, and I figure since I have my own texting pet name for her, she's trying to do the same. But some opinions from both genders is welcome.

>>17853622
For one, pressing her about it is probably making her more stressed. Be light hearted, send her links to stuff she'll enjoy, tell her you love her. Figure out when you two will be able to see next, and schedule a date together. Then you both have something to look forward to.
You can't fix her being stressed. Sometimes we're going to have stressful times in our lives, and you can't make it go away. You can just make it so that you are not another avenue of stress, and to be there for her for what she asks of you.

>>17853622
Maybe you don't listen to her.
I'm fine.
> no this must mean something else

>>17853563
>>17853663
Ask him again? He might have forgotten. We canNOT know if he's being malicious, because we are not in his head. What do you want from us?

>>17853675
Term of endearment. I call chte guys 'young lad' as a joke.

If she says you're like her dad or bri then you're zoned

>>17853648
I think it's mildly uncommon to find a long term partner who is genuinely into kinky sex and wants it every time.
You could find someone into it in the short term for sure. Most girls are at least open to it.

>took co-worker out to celebrate her bday earlier this month
>says she's not looking to date cuz she doesn't have time for a bf
>has turned down at least 5 guys so she's not just saying it
>have a good time out
>I give her this exposition about how I enjoy spending time with her and how I've gotten to know her lately

Am I stupid for still trying? I don't want to come on strongly and scare her away. But she had to have gotten the message right? Or do women not read between the lines?

>>17853675
Could be either/or. We can't read her mind.

>>17853681
Thanks for the reply.

Thankfully she hasn't ever said I'm like her bro or dad. So I'm guessing it's still a good sign.

>>17853677
Thanks man, basixally doing just that, good to know I'm on the right track

>>17853688
I would tend to believe that a guy wouldn't be so stupid as to take me being so clear about my position as an invitation to try something.
I would either take your exposition as a platonic friendship thing, or she will be cringing because she has to turn ANOTHER guy down.

>>17853657
>>17853658
>>17853660
>>17853661
>>17853663
Jesus, why did my comment got deleted?

Well, one by one: I could try getting into details but actually it's not as exotic as I might sound. If I do that kinky test usually the most interesting result is that I'm both Dominant And Submissive. A little more Dominant though, but there it is. Not much, I even get a small vanilla percentage, maybe because i'm not into polyamoruos concepts and threesomes?

I don't know, she liked being spanked, choked, things I never tried with someone else and not only I end up loving them, but I remember the first time we had sex, just when we ended doing all that stuff she asked me "are you sure this isn't your first time?"
She had a lot of attitude and that is one of the things I'm afraid of never once find again on somene else. She could look straight into my eye and ask me "Want to try yellow raining me tonight?" We could be at a house party or at a bar with friends and she would whisper me to come to the bathroom in 5 minutes. It was a game, we were very adventurous so it was all really so smooth. She liked roleplaying, she was very open about the things she liked, she was very into dirty talk.

It's that whole thing... Maybe i haven't been with many girls, maybe I have been with only kind-of-cold type of girls... but being with her made me discover a nature I wasn't aware of.

>>17853692
True, but I guess it's just looking for opinions based on your own experiences/outlook on it

>>17853679
Lol I'm not that bad, I'm not pressing hard but her demeanor betrays her words sometimes and I can tell when something is not great

>>17853698
Good! I'm glad.
Don't forget not to throw yourself at her feet and to not fret and worry about her. The first, she'll feel guilty for taking your help because she can see that you're going farther than is healthy for you. The latter, she'll pick up on your anxiety and it'll make her anxious.

If you're not doing those things, then you're doing all you can do. Good luck! It sucks when someone you love is in a bad place. I always want to smother the bad feelings, but it's just not feasable nor appropriate. Darn.

>>17853704
I wouldn't say that all girls are like that, but they certainly aren't rare.

>>17853702
She didn't turn me down. Saw her a few days ago and she's still the same. If anything I think it was too subtle, or as you say, she took it as platonic and me jyst being sweet or whatever

>>17853705
For me calling guys that, I could honestly go either way. It would be indicative that I like the person. Now whether that like is platonic or not, I couldn't say.

>>17853704
In my experience it's fairly common to be like that at the beginning and more rare in the long term.
I know very few couples that are still so passionate after a few years.

A lot of girls like being submissive.

>>17853712
Well put, I'm recognizing when I'm doing them and trying to roll that in, but it's hardly at all. Though you're right, I just wanna make it better but can't. Wasn't sure how to handle it but you've been reassuring, thank you.

>>17853721
No, I mean that she's waiting for you to fuck up and to actually ask her out, in which she'll have to blatantly turn you down.
Since you didn't ask for a response of "will you be my bride" or anything, she can play it safe and pretend you didn't mean anything by it. She's probably guessing that you mean something more, but she would prefer to believe otherwise.
Also if she thought you meant more and was wrong, she'd look like a vain twat if she brought it up to reject you. She'd want to avoid that.

Boys, Girls

Have you dated someone who did drugs... but you didn't do it?


I just got out of a relationship and this was one of the big breaking points. I never once shamed her or told her not to do it (she did lots of mdma and coke, and some speed too) but at times I felt really displaced...

Now my friends do drugs, i'm used to have that around, so then why it was such a big deal for me? At times I feel it might be just a different stuff: My friends, a bit more older than me, just go out and have fun and if they want drugs or get them offered they do them. But my ex and her friends? They just went out to do drugs, and let the rest happen. Or maybe they didn't even left the flat, just listening to music and snorting speed.

I don't know guys, I thought I could deal with it. I'm as outgoing as hers but it's like there's something that's quite not right there, always feels like she's way way frivolous about it instead of just something she does along with dancing and drinking

>>17853709
It might be that she isn't okay but doesn't want to talk about it.
It's kind of a frustrating thing that we have in our society, that if we bring something up it's an invitation to talk about it. It's something that I've been practicing (I feel kinda shit, but I don't really want to talk about it)

But saying that also makes the other person wonder and worry. And that makes me feel bad.

So I'll say "I'm fine." Because while I'm not great, I'm not even good, I am just fine. I'll be okay, I don't need their help, and I will persevere.

>>17853724
what makes them not so passionate over the years? That scares me, the whole "time ends the passion flame"

I feel like I could really get kinky over the years, but things like involving other people in this matters... i'm still not sure about it, you know?

>>17853735
Like you say, it's definitely about perspective and priorities.

I'm on the other side, where I'm dating someone who's sober while I'm not. It's kind of inspired me to drink/smoke less, to be honest. I haven't smoked once in the time we've been together.

>>17853739
Makes sense, thank you for the response.

>>17853727
Oh that's not happening. I know she's not looking to date, so I wouldn't have been stupid enough to waste my shot. I guess in that moment I thought I'd say "yeah I'm attracted to you, but I know you're doing your thing right now".
I guess I should just back off then? Last thing I need is to be either seen as an orbiter or creep.

>>17853743
Passion slowing down doesn't mean there's not as much love.
It just means that you did the exciting things, and it's a little tiring now. You just want to slow down and enjoy each other as is.
Also the passionate exciting stuff is also exciting because it's new. When you've done it for years, you kind of have already had the experiences. It's less exciting and wow-inducing.

>>17853722
I guess it's just so neutral it's hard to make a call. Thanks for your insight though.

Still beats getting called bro at least.

>>17853747
>I'm on the other side, where I'm dating someone who's sober while I'm not. It's kind of inspired me to drink/smoke less, to be honest. I haven't smoked once in the time we've been together.

my best friend actually told me that could happen and it was the best. She's dating someone who does drugs like her and of course they all end up doing them but shit, you really see how tired she gets at the end, coming back home tired but never being able to sleep.

This whole thing bugs me because, shit, i'm as outgoing as her. She could have been my perfect party partner, and the fact drugs ended up breaking it up, it makes me feel as if it was all my fault because I never wanted to get into that game


but what the hell, what am I to blame if I decided to stay away from that kinda stuff? I have tried coke once, but that was it. I dn't need it to stay awake and energetic. I don't need MDMA to dance and be happy.

>>17853743
Briefly jumping in, with what I gather, as a relationship becomes more complex you're not just getting together to fuck anymore and have fun. My gf and I are a good team but that includes doing all the boring day to day shit together. We still have great sex, but it's not as great as before. I'm mostly okay with that. However when we spend more quality time together that helps things get hotter. That meme as old as time is true. Also, were more comfortable with each other adding in the bonus of feeling better doing kinkier things.

>>17853743
Because at the beginning you are breaking a taboo. After the 20th time you suck a dick in a bathroom it becomes less exciting and it becomes another Friday night.

Over time you get used to each other and you are less infatuated.
Not saying I don't fuck my boyfriend but, yeah, I don't need to fuck him 24/7 like I did at the beginning and when we fuck is not as kinky. We still get kinky once or twice a week, but we are calmer than we were.

It is normal.

>>17853755
Oh, good! So you do like having her as a friend? You do want to keep it platonic?
So you could say something like, "I really admire you sticking to who you are and doing your own thing, being an individual, and not needing relationships. It's nice because I can enjoy my time with you without that distance that normally needs to be put in to opposite gender friendships.

>>17853748
Sure thing! Good luck. Take care of yourself! Don't forget you.

>>17853766
>it was the best
Yeah, it's been nice. It made me reconsider what I was using them for. I was using alcohol in particular as a bit of a crutch. I can be outgoing and liked just fine while I'm sober. I don't need alcohol as an excuse to strike up conversations with random strangers. I like this life now.

>the fact drugs ended up breaking it up
It's not the drugs themselves, it's how she treats and relies on drugs that is throwing you off. Like you said, your friends do drugs and it doesn't bother you because it isn't their whole life.

To Women: How the fuck do I flirt in person when you approach me?

I'm a 24 year old non-virgin but all my girlfriends have come form online dating. I'm not unattractive, I'm 6'4 and go to the gym 3 times a week. I find myself being approached by girls at parties and just having an awkward conversation that then fizzles into nothing

>>17853788
Sounds like you need to practice just how to create and hold conversations with strangers. It's tricky! Think about it less as learning how to talk with girls, and more about how to talk with strangers.

>>17853786
Yeah... I should stop blaming myself, I think it was just that.

She's way younger than me. Well not that much, but it's not about the age gap but about the priorities, and I guess that also extended to drugs.

She had a past of dealing with grief, with painful things, by going crazy and doing a fuckton of drugs. She started doing coke at very young age after a series of painful events. I would never blame her for doing such thing, but I guess that has become an habit. We met at the wake of a very painful situation for her and even if I tried and tried, my efforts to just stand there for her and take care of her and support her weren't enought

She just has another way to deal with the pain

>>17853735
Her behavior seems very extreme, anon. It bothers you because she engages in obviously harmful consumption in comparison to your friends, and it's just hard to watch someone you care about make such choices all the time.
I know for sure I wouldn't be able to handle that boat. Do you think there's any scenario in which she becomes more responsible? Otherwise, a serious long term relationship is just not something that will happen.

>>17853735
I have and I dont regret it and I think its a perfectly valid reason to not see someone anymore.

>>17853795
>We met at the wake of a very painful situation for her and even if I tried and tried, my efforts to just stand there for her and take care of her and support her weren't enough
>Weren't enough
It isn't your job to save her from her addiction. It isn't your job to save her from her past. It isn't your job to save her from her pain. It is NOT your job to save her from herself. This is her own fucked up life. She dug her own grave and she has to be the one to drag herself out of the dirt. It is NOT your job.

If you ended up doing everything for her, then that means she'd never learn how to do anything for herself. That's called codependency. You don't want to walk down that path, anon. Believe me, I've been there. You lose all sense of self. Your life becomes living her life for her. That is hell. It's hell, anon. You deserve better than that.

>>17853788
Say whatever dumb shit is on your mind. You will learn pretty fast what to say and what not to.

>>17853812
I didn't pretend to sound like I was acting like some sort of saviour for her. You are very much right, it's not my job. She was just going through some pain after the loss of an important family member and I was just there supporting her, hugging her, taking care of her.

>>17853810
>>17853809
It's currently over. It wasn't even the breaking point: Her pain lead her to tell me she didn't felt ready for a serious relationship and felt she needed herself first. Told me she still loved me and that I made her happy, and from there we tried to have something less labelled. I admit, as much of a fool this could make me, that I loved her so much I wanted to stick with her even though she didnt felt ready for that respnsability. From that point, things got worse and colder and colder, until one final morning (after spending the whole last night together, with no problem at all) we talked about what we had (because she got introduced to friends of my friends as my girlfriend and that didn't seem to bother her at the moment but it did the moment I came back home) and after telling her I respected her situation but I wanted a future with her, she told me "We aren't having a monogamous relationship, Anon".

I understanded the implications of such response and I decided the best for me was breaking up.

Since then, she spended the next two weeks writing me stuff like "this song I listened to today reminded me of you" and such things, to a point I had to ask her, very politely, to leave me alone because it was making matters worsts. She just said "I still love you obviously, but it's complicated and thus I don't know very well how to act... sorry"from there i've been only realizing the bad stuff that was in the relationship. Thanks guys, you pretty much summed up what I always felt as a hunch, as those feelings of "something is quite wrong but I can't point out what"

Thanks for your feedback and your insight. Seeing things from others perspectives... it helps

>>17853849
You are very mature, anon! I'm proud of you. You handled this perfectly. I'm glad that we could help you. That's what we're here for.

>>17853862
You think so? I feel like after all this has happened, I've grow up a lot.

The other anon that said the whole "saviour" thing, it makes me a little afraid that I might ended up being a little what I exactly aggreed wasn't a good way to act. I never pretended to be a saviour for her but I loved her and of cousre I wanted to help her. I feel like I did more than just "what I could have done" but, atleast I pulled out. Guess that draws the difference

>>17853770
I mean she's a great person. Definitely one of those "I can bring home to mom" type of girls.
I can handle being her friend, but my goal (for lack of a better word) would be to ask her out when she's ready to put herself out there, and if I'm single as well when that time comes. So while I'm cool with being her friend, I don't want to get too close and become JUST a friend.

male anon here. gf of 3 years ended things with me in september and pretty much distanced herself from me until the end of that month. we talk again and ven have sex once all up until the 25th of october where we had spent the day together and she openly stated how she wanted to get back together as much as i did however i turned down the offer saying i wanted a little more time to mature as she wanted however she still wanted to spend as much time together as possible in the intrum which i agreed to. after that she just vanished never spoke to me again and i just wonder am i in the wrong for not going back then and there? i really do love her but ive been down ever since (im guessing because of the lack of closure). so femanons could you give me some ideas as to why she just left things like that without even saying a word? shes older than me by 6 months so i personally dont see it as a catty thing but i genuinely suck at understanding what goes through a females mind.

>>17853879
Hey, I was there too. Saviour complexes are hard to get out of our system. Because it feels soooo good to help other people. Why do you think I'm here on /adv/?
You caught yourself before you let her consume your life. You shouldn't be so hard on yourself about leaving, and you should definitely not blame yourself for what she does to herself.
Just because you got a taste of saviour-dom doesn't mean that you did something wrong. It was an important lesson for you to see that you can't fix someone. And you walked away. That's so important! We need to experience these things. You can't learn all your lessons on theory. You have to tangibly see what it feels like.

>>17853888
Hm. That's dangerous. Especially for using 'goal'. You could have used 'preference', because that implies that you would be okay with being her friend forever. You really should just cross her out of your mind. If you're waiting for her to come around, that is the definition of an orbiter. You can't be that guy. Don't do that to yourself. There's no promise that she'll ever come around, and there no promise that if she does that she'd choose you.

>>17853879
Wanting to help and wanting to save someone are very different things. You can see for yourself that she wasn't committed to being helped, so you knew when to step back. The savior thing would only apply if you were obsessed with helping her no matter how she felt about it.
You did the right thing, and you did a good thing. Even if things between you didn't work out, you have shown her that she can connect with people, which isn't always something we see clearly when we go through a hard time. Consider this a positive experience, even if the ending was a bit bitter.

>>17853898
Let her go, man. We can't know. Maybe she got scared, or maybe she changed her mind, or maybe a multitude of other things.

>shes older than me by 6 months
When you're older than a toddler, we call that "the same age"

>>17852983
Started snapchatting a girl a few days [spoiler]thanks to /adv/[/spoiler], but I'm not sure about the next step

The first day we sent a lot of snaps back and forth, talking about Pokemon and school and shit, all good vibes as far as interest goes, though there was only one selfie. The next day she starts snapchatting me again, sending more cute selfies (another good sign), but it doesn't last long and she stops snapchatting me only after a few hours.

Today I snapped her, got one response mentioning her exam, sent another snap back basically saying "good luck" in a witty way, and there was nothing else. And I know she's on Snapchat because her story's being updated with inane shit. Maybe I came across as too excited - I did usually provide long captions but I did wait a few minutes to open her snaps.

In any case, I know I shouldn't be concerned by somebody not texting/snapping me back, but it's concerning that there's such a drop-off after just a few days. How do I pick up the pace with her and keep things interesting? At what point should I ask for a number? (I'd love to take her out next week after I get back home)

>>17853970
Why do you have to have long multi-hour conversations every day? Maybe she needs some time to herself, or to her other friends, or whatever.
Whether it's appropriate to ask her out yet is based more on how personal your conversations have been and how close you two are. Sounds like you've been doing good.

Girls, I want to ask one of my coworkers out to check out a light show and go somewhere after for dinner or just hanging out. There's plenty to do in the area so I'm not to worried about that. I don't get many opportunities outside work to see them so I think something that we could talk around would be good as a start. I don't know if it matters but it would be my first experience with them outside of work.

Thoughts on this?

>>17854024
What exactly are you anxious about? Sounds like it has a lot of potential to be a fun date.

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Girls, why is it when I drink the milk after eating cereal it hurts the back teeth? why! WHY! HOW COMEZ I GOTZ 2 BE SO FAT!

>>17854040
I don't do dates a lot so I have no clue, but thank you that helps. I guess the real issue is to wait to see them at work which could be a few days or get a hold of them through facebook and go from there

>>17854063
When I drink milk I just fart really badly.

>>17853273
depends on the couple. I've said it with confidence after 3 months of exclusive dating, some wait longer. I think "science" says you'd know with certainty after a month of dating but it'd depend on how exclusive you are and how frequently you two meet

>>17853483
slowly started pulling physical intimacy (we used to fuck multiple times a week) until it was only a handjob once a month thing and I had to put in a ridiculous amount of romancing to get that. started talking less frequently and it was a lot less close than what it was.

>>17854006
To be fair, the conversations haven't been super personal, nor have I really flirted (I don't want to come off as too strong against this chick, as she's very inexperienced).

Should I start out tomorrow or the next day asking her something more personal, or should I keep it to funny comments and pictures for now and wait for her to progress things.

>>17853735
probably just be subconsciously picking up cues or traits that she's not a good person but you've normalized it by being around a lot of users that might be normal/ok

>>17854160
Well you don't need to be personal personal in order to ask her on a date

Girls

I live in a area where it's really hard to meet people my age. it's a busy metropolitan area. But young people away. It's too expensive to live here, so young people can't afford it. So it's fucking hard to meet girls. So I took to Tinder, and it's sooo hard to get fucking matched on Tinder. It's really fucking depressing me. What should I do..

>>17854299
meetup.com, or something, nobody fucking uses tinder seriously anymore. It's also not great for meeting people unless you only wanted to fuck and then never talk to each other again,

>>17854521

I've looked at that and OKC/POF and 90% of the girls aren't even attractive...

>>17853921
Not sure if you're still around. But you're right. I tell myself I could forget her if need be, and date other girls. But at the end of the day I still think of her.

I'm going back to school in spring for a second degree, so I should start to focus on myself I guess.

Thanks for your input though. Femanon I assume?

>hung out with a cute girl a few times
>watched a movie the second time we hung out
>she looked cold so I told her she could come over to me; she said she thought she'd be OK
>hung out again tonight
>she was acting cold so I asked her if she wanted my sweater
>said yes and asked if it was okay
>kept it on until she left

I'm not sure if she's interested. The sweater thing seems like a good sign, but she hasn't sent me any "kiss me" vibes. About a week or so after the 2nd time we hung out (when I asked her if she wanted to come over to me), she texted me asking if I wanted to hang out.

What do you guys think? I don't think she's leading me on or anything. And I think most girls wouldn't accept a guy's sweatshirt if they weren't interested.

Guys, thoughts on piercings? What's okay, what's too much?

>>17854773
I dig septum piercings and gauges, but I'm just one person.

I've also got a septum piercing so I may be biased.

Girls: What do you think of septum piercings on guys? I've got a captive bead ring.

friend, been texting back and forth for 2 years. last convo was on a good note.

*no communication for 2.5 months*

Her: Hey! Hope you're well
Me: Hey X! It's been a minute
Me: I'm ok more or less. How are you?

no response.

What did she mean by this

>>17854773

septums have been uniformly worn by people who have some sort of incompatibility with me personality wise. I like nose hoops but i find that every girl who has one is shallow. nose studs are neutral. eyebrow piercing tells me there's something wrong with you as well. extreme body mods are a cry for attention, stretched ears beyond whatever goes back to normal is fucking stupid.

thats the answer you wanted right?

>>17854814
>Girls: What do you think of septum piercings on guys? I've got a captive bead ring.
They're a bit of a stretch, if I'm being honest, thought they're not a turnoff or anything. I prefer the horseshoe style rings over captive bead rings though.

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Girls

Should I have lied? She implied I have experience cuddling or just being with girls (which I have practically jack shit for experience). I've never cuddled before. So, should I have lied to her? Or am I ok for being honest?

>>17854849
yeh that is a huge blunder bro. She gave you a free home run right there and u fell on ur face.

Cut the emojis. They don't make whatever u are saying less creepy.

You should have responded with "idk how often are you cuddling with short girls *insert gay laughing emoji*" saying actually not really is the most conversation killing thing you could have possibly said. How does anyone respond to that, like look at how she responded "sure hahaha" obviously not the kind of response you want to get, and then you start reconciling with ask her a question after you missed the opportunity.

THINK BEFORE YOU PRESS SEND.

>>17854876

but that doesn't make sense to me Tbh...

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Females

Would it be weird if I started texting a girl I previously only talked to about school stuff about random shit during the break between semesters
also
Am I overthinking this

I'm locked into a career that will absorb my life

What do women think about a 35 year old fit virgin an with lots of money?

Haha, I know most are laughing at me, but that's how my life shook out

I'm an old inexperienced man with lots of money and a fit body
Women can accept me, yes?

>>17854885
Not that person but this is how it went

>I bet you get with a lot of girls
Nope I'm a virgin faggot
>Haha cool joke
No really I'm a virgin faggot


Clear enough? You wouldve been okay if you didn't insist the second time, you could've said something like "well we can meet up and you'll be the judge of it ;)" something that suggests action.

>>17854849
Does it matter? You've said it already

>>17854898
Not many women plan to be single at that age

>>17854901

But I've literally been talking to this girl for 20min. So why would I try to imply sex?

>>17854894
Well feel it out to begin with

Text her some pic you think she'd like or something related to an inside joke, if you guys talk from that then she's interested. If you only get lol as a response, try again later if same result drop it

there is this girl and i feel she likes me more than i like her

asking me to sleep over and eat at her place etc

im gonna be honest all i really want is to do shit together like watch movies and have sex

basicly only watch movies and have sex, im not into all the other relationship shit and i dont feel like she is my soulmate or anything

what do i do? it was mainly my horny level that landed me with her

>>17854947
i dont know if i should feel bad or tell her anything or whatever cause to be honest i dont think she fits me right as a gf or anything

im confused

i mainly like her untill i have blown my load

does this make me a bad person? also im autistic maybe probably and im not into the whole people thing anyway

>>17854910
Is your goal not sex? If you're just looking to be friends who gives a fuck just say whatever. But in that case you wouldnt be asking our opinion. Plus you're already talking about cuddling for fucks sake its a natural segway into sex.

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Grills,
Would you tie the knot with a fighter pilot or would the ever present possibility of his death keep you away?

>>17852983
Hey femanons, my wife keeps getting in a mood everytime I am going out with friends. The thing is she never makes it about the fact I'm going out with friends, she always finds something else to get in a mood about, then expects me to sit and argue.

Any idea why she does this?

I don't help the situation because I just walk out, which causes another arguement.

>>17855022
death is an ever present possibility for everyone, so no.

What would you do if the guy you date thinks you are undesirable/fat (and tells you that you are) even if you are a normal weight and considered good looking?

>>17855034
She might be threatened by the fact you pay more attention, in her perspective, to your friends instead of her. Arguing might be her way of checking to see if you're willing to pay attention to her when she needs it.

>>17855034
she is jealouse. for whatever reason. maybe she was hoping to spend the evening with you? if that might be the case, how often do you go out with her ir spend quality time at home where you aren't sitting on the pc/tv/phone?
maybe she is afraid of you getting to know other girls. does she have low selfesteem? is there a history of you being unfaithful? does she have a history of being cheated on?
try to not walk away next time but instead get to the root of the problem. it might not be a very logical reason (her ex once started to text with a girl he met at a night out with his friends and now she is terriefied that you will do the same, so for her "you going out with friends" equals "you meeting someone you find more enchanting than her, then leave her") but it is giving her very real emotions nonetheless. try to be understanding but also state your needs (some time with your friends) and try to find a solution that doesn't leave one of you torn

>>17855046
Ask him why he's dating me and break up I guess

>>17854963
Better tell her so no one gets hurt.

Or consider that you don't have feelings for her yet because you just met? Like do you like her as a person at all?

>>17854763
Bumpo

>>17855066
I just asked him and he tells me be finds me beautiful but that I'm "big/bigger than his exes"
I'm 5 10 and 63 kg and I hit the gym. I do have a belly tho when I sit tho. Guess I'll go kms

>>17855022

If he dies, you're set financially for life.

>>17852983
Hey, men. Well, I live in a small apartment with a tiny fridge and no car, so I often get lazy and just pick junk up at the convenience store that is literally about 3 houses away from where I live. At this store there's a regular guy. (I don't know if it matters but he is covered in 3rd/4th degree burns, he's got hair though and is not necessarily unattractive) Half the time I'm there I come with my boyfriend, and I've always just thrown something random on when I go. So this guy has never seen me with makeup or clothes that actually fit and he knows I'm in a relationship. Yet, he still stares at me. Like he really looks at me.

Does this just mean that he likes me? Honestly I've been in a relationship for 3 years and nobody flirts with me or anything anymore so it's kind of surprising to see it. Do you think people are mean to him from the scars and me being nice to him could be it? What would you think from this? We haven't really conversed, but I did help him pick some things up when he bumped a shelf one time. I don't know. It's just weird, and intense

>>17855022
I wouldn't be worried about him dying. Id be worried about being home all alone while he wastes our potential romantic life as a pawn for his government.

>>17855075
>tfw no tall gf

>>17855046
i dated a guy like that for half a year. i tried to not give his mean remarks too much value but they still hurt like hell and i ended up losig weight. i came to my senses when i had to go to the hospital for other reasons and a nurse checked my blood pressure and it was way too low and she asked how i feel and i said "fine". she got a pretty weitd look on her face and said normally i should have fainted, especially given my fragile frame, to which he responded with "yeah, fragile, as if". i broke up with him as soon as i was out of the hospital. best decision ever.
don't do this to yourself. there's nothing wrong with a guy wanting you to be healthy. but if he wants you thin, no matter what it takes, that is a red flag.

>>17855056
The thing is I rarely hang out with my friends these days because we all work different shifts at the same place, so getting days together is hard. So I don't know why she feels I pay more attention to them.
>>17855065
She was working and started about an hour after I was due to leave.
There's no history of me being unfaithful, and she's never been cheated on, however, she is a little insecure, and does some times think I'm going to cheat on her (an endless topic of discussion every few months which alone becomes exhausting.).
The thing is it was just a lads night, with only lads having a few beers and playing poker, there wasn't going to be any girls there.

>>17855086
I know, thank you so much for sharing this and I appreciate your advice a lot. It seems so silly but I considered starving myself and I just can't do it. This hurts like hell
God I'm crying. Thank you so much.

>>17855084
>tfw no tall chaser bf

>>17855088
Heres another idea, maybe she thinks you leave the house cuz you wanna avoid some responsibility. Like maybe you forgot to do the dishes and now you're leaving? That might make sense of her "get back here you" automatic responses. Or maybe its a more emotional/relationship issue that she feels you have been avoiding lately?

>>17855088
fears aren't know to be very rational most of the time.
we don't know her complex reasoning on why she wants you home instead of out with the guys. ask her. but don't ask her when shit is about to hit the fan. ask her right now! say "i noticed that everytime i want to spend time with my friends, we end up argueing and i can't shake the feeling that the arguments are really about me not being home. what's that about?"

>>17855083
But he'd get to take the highway to the danger zone, so it's okay

>>17853273
You say it when you feel it, when it feels comfortable. When you want to spend so much time with them you could basically just move in. When you care about their personal being and family. When you feel like you're going to spend a long ass time with them.

>>17853274
I'm sure it's something about you, but that is just something that goes by averages. You probably don't want an average girl if you're not yourself, anyways. You will find somebody.

>>17853608
Very

>>17853648
Most wome will experiment but that doesn't mean that they're going to be kinky absolutely every time.

>>17853675
Most likely playful, endearing...

>>17855099
>it aint me starts playing

>>17855088
Just bring it up to her. Tell her that you're concerned and don't want to just be unaware of some way that you could be hurting her

bump :,(

why are most college boys allergic to commitment
aka why am I only attracted to/interested in assholes and how can I change my tastes?

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Girls and guys
Is it wrong for a boyfriend to react negatively if his girl's guy friend slaps her on the butt as a joke? I don't think so, I can understand the sentimental value of possessiveness in a relationship among both man and woman but at the same time I understand the whole "its just a prank bro" mentality behind it and making it seem as an overreaction. I doubt its close to even being anything controlling.

This isn't t related to anything, just wanted your thoughts.

>>17855263
>Is it wrong for a boyfriend to react negatively if his girl's guy friend slaps her on the butt as a joke?
There is literally no other way to react to it.

Would you react negatively if a girl friend of his touched his balls and used it as some joke?

>"Relax anons gf, I was just saying he has big big cojones!"

>>17855261
Because they're young and surrounded by easy pussy. If they don't want to marry young and/or they think they might find someone they like better later, there's no reason for them to commit

>>17855263
It's also a pride thing. Someone purposefully touches your gf's butt who isn't you. If you laugh it off and don't do anything at all, like you don't even jokingly say 'yo knock it off man that's my girl'

people gonna think you don't give a shit about your gf, you're a cuck, or a pussy who can't defend his girl.

I don't think you've ever been in a relaionship hav you?>>17855263

My girlfriend and I are gonna have sex on Friday probably.

She claims that because she's on birth control that I don't have to wear a condom but I'm 21 and CANNOT have a kid right now. Should I wear a condom just to be safe?

>>17855313
YES

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Girls:
What are some good ways a guy can signal he's not interested that way/make it clear dinner isn't a date?

I'm catching up with a friend and I've just realised she's sending signals.

Is it worthwhile saying I've had my heart broken by unrequited love recently, or would this just make her feel like she can fix me?

>>17855320
That's all the validation I need.

>>17854773
ears and nose studs are fine, lip/tongue/monroe/septum/eyebrow piercings just look tacky
>>17855261
speak for yourself. I could fuck girls fairly easily but getting one to be facebook official was impossible
>>17855313
always wear a condom, even if you want kids

>>17855304
I have, what comes to mind is this issue my friend had where his girl's friend, who is also a girl, said as a joke "X likes huge black men and want to be part of their clique." and he left the group chat because he didn't like what was being said (this was over text in an app) and his girl thought he was being controlling and the friend thought he was being childish. I wouldn't have left the group but he did talk to the friend saying stuff how he doesn't tolerate that stuff but the friend kept saying it was a joke and he was being childish because his girl didn't care about what was being said.

I thought my friend reacted normally giving the cucky nature of that joke

>>17855313
Just ask your parents if you can still have a kid on birthcontrol

He ignores me almost every day and now that I'm leaving he's mad. Why?

>>17855362
Harsh bro....harsh.

Dating this young girl (18)
When we have sex (usually at around 11 pm) she would cum after like 1 minute, I wanted to keep going she said it hurts her, so she would jerk me off instead, then I tucked her into bed, went back to study, slept at 2 AM and then awoken at 4 to her sucking my dick, then she rode me until orgasm then fell asleep on top of me, I had to go to class at 9 feel like a zombie. This happened a few times already and it's becoming a habit.
Can I just tell her to stop doing this, is this even natural for girls this age? she said she woke up in the middle of the night and felt really horny she "couldn't help herself"? maybe I should feed her melatonin at night? would it be ok if your bf give you melatonin?

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Girls

Is it so bad to just want a girlfriend to cuddle/kiss/live with and hang around?

Im not interested in sex, i dont think i ever want to do it, it seems like such a hassle and being naked infront someone else is awkward, i think it probably will be an unpleasant experience for me.

>>17855873
She will probably fulfill those needs elsewhere.

>>17855083
not really a pawn more a bishop

>>17855879
true, all girls seems to be sluts today

>>17853608
Absolutely. He's basically saying he doesn't acknowledge or respect your relationship. I feel sorry for your bf if this is something you need to actually ask.

>>17853735
Sort of, in that I dated a stoner. I still don't have anything against the substance itself, but she was absolutely always stoned. It wasnt a way to mellow out, it was a lifestyle. Something like that will always be a dealbreaker. I think you'd be peeved even if it was your friends doing it, if they used substances to the point you could never actually talk to them.

>>17855889
That's not really it, a slut is a girl whom you fuck her good, but still cheats, that guys's gf would be left without a good fuck.

>>17855075
http://www.mybodygallery.com/search.html?gender=female&height=178&age=any&weight=64&pantSize=any&shirtSize=any&bodytype=

idk, seems pretty fine to me unless your body carries it horribly. Seems more like he's trying to nibble at your self esteem to me.

>>17855093
>tfw no tall chaser bf
Tall women just don't really seem to exist in the real world. Most of the women I'm peers with are pretty short and it's just weird dating someone a foot shorter than you.

>>17855361
>I thought my friend reacted normally giving the cucky nature of that joke
Sounds like a shitty gf. Everyone is well aware of the undertones of that kind of joke, it's not normal to not be comfortable with it.

> male friend sends me links to lingerie sales
> suggests places I should gi visit with my bf
> I don't have a bf and he knows
> tells me these cringy first date stories and repeats the pick up lines as a joke
Is this what a close male friend would do? Or is it more like a bro/sis friendship that he feels close enough to do that.

>>17855909
He wants to bone you.

I have a small penis (maybe 4in) and am a virgin @ 30.


Do girls in general feel like its underwhelming?

>>17855873
It's easiest if you're okay with being romantically monogamous (eg no cutesy stuff and intimate talk with another lover) but she gets to have sex with others. If you want to decide that she can't have sex with you OR anyone else, you're pretty much forced to look for a girl who feels the same way as you do, and that's a much much smaller dating pool than you'd otherwise have.

Even if you -are- okay with her having sex with others, the risk is big that one day she's going to fall for a guy who also smiles cutely at her, also hugs her tight, also goofs around with her, but to top it off has an enthusiastic sex life with her and makes her feel sexually desired. So even if a sexual girl agrees on surface level it is a very fragile construction.

>>17855909
maybe you should fuck him.

>>17855912
Those two facts by themselves? Yeah. But that's not how people get judged. I find that a lot of guys who worry about their dick seem to think like there's an exact copy of them with the only difference being a bigger penis. This is not the case, you bring a unique combination of qualities to the table both as a person/as company and as a partner in a relationship. Even if a carbon copy with a monstercock existed, what are the odds that the girl you set your eye on will meet him, he's going to want her etc etc etc? There is no point about thinking in abstract hypotheticals, all that matters is whether a girl falls for you and is satisfied with your level of experience and size.

>>17855911
I like someone else.

>>17855921
Then tell him because he definitely thinks he has a chance with you.

>>17855921
uhm... so?

>>17855919
So it just means I have to aim younger, inorder to avoid the more "experienced" girls.

The lower the experience the better right?

>>17855921
Doesnt matter. He's not a mind reader. Talk to him, lay out some boundaries since he has the wrong idea about you.

>>17855922
I will. I just hope he won't dislike me then.

>>17855935
He probably will just drift away, but it's for the better.

>>17855926
Eh.. I don't think it's that simple. For one thing experience isn't a static thing, if a girl has been with one partner who was an amazing lover her expectations will be higher than if she's been with five guys who did a half asses job. Particularly one night stands or short-lived flings/dating that was terminated early doesn't do the same for experience as a long term relationship with a good lover (which really spoils someone). Then again, as you guess there is no saying - if a girl has only been with a great guy for five years then her expectations will be through the roof, if she was only with a shitty lover for five years she probably doesn't even know that she could have so much more fun.
And, obviously, it matters a lot how much of sex comes naturally to you. It's something you have a knack for or not, though experience and determination to do well also matter a lot, but natural talent is a thing. Don't worry about blowing your load too quickly, this is also common for men who have gone without for a while and regular penetration only lasts ~seven minutes anyway.
The whole "one minute man" refers more to the overall picture of a lover who dumps his semen in you then turns around and falls asleep than the mere fact itself that he came quickly (which is a compliment, let's face it, and personally I don't like partners to do time tables in their head so they can last twenty minutes or whatever). This is all the more relevant if you can easily go for multiple rounds.

Furthermore whether she is turned off by the technicality of you being inexperienced (if you're thinking about sharing) depends more on her sexual preferences than anything else - a very submissive woman will find that much more off putting than a dominant one.

And concerning what they think of your dick that depends on how deep their vagina is and how much they generally enjoy penetration (compared to oral, fingering etc)...

Don't worry if it's a ONS, they're almost always fumbly.

>>17855935
>I just hope he won't dislike me then
he won't if you have sex with him!

>>17855926
I think it's the opposite, really.

>>17855919
This is a pretty intelligent post.
I hope you are good looking, too.

>>17855939
Good info.

What do you say women are mostly? Dominant or submissive?

How do you know if women have deep vagina or not so deep vagina? Race factor?

>>17855932
Should I apologize as well? Because I may have unintentionally made him feel that.

>>17855385
In case you check up on the thread: melatonin is pretty harmless but check with her, it's creepy as fuck to feed your partner anything like that without them being aware. But it will help her fall asleep, not put her out for the night for sure.

Either way, what you describe is really uncool. I can very much understand and enthusiastic eighteen year old gal thinking it's every man's dream to wake up to her riding their dick, but to continue doing it after you expressed that you don't want it with the argument that she "can't help herself" is honestly fucked up.

I would stress one more time that you don't want to be worthless during college, you can fuck at other times, don't do it in the mjddle of the night like that. If she still protests, be blunt and tell her that she's being pretty rape-y about this. Be aware that she might be the type who will just move on and try to find a human dildo in someone else, though. But she needs to be told that going against someone's explicitly shared boundaries is not done.

>>17855939
>The whole "one minute man" refers more to the overall picture of a lover who dumps his semen in you then turns around and falls asleep
I wish I could be this guy, imagine all the time that could've been saved.

>>17855945
Submissive, but it's impossible to get a real good perspective on. All the more because dominant man + submissive woman is the most conventional way to portray sexual dynamics in society and obviously that influences people as well. It feels a bit like my personal hang up because I'm more on the dominant side but I personally often feel like many women have more of that side within themselves than they realize because they buy into the idea that the man pleasures the woman while she makes noise and graces him with her body. (Not that all submissiveness is like that, at all, just making fun of the stereotypical trope.)

It is honestly random. It could be that race plays a role but there is to this day no quick and easy method to measure depth, all the more because depending on the woman's level of arousal there are different sized, and vaginas aren't exactly straightforward and roomy.
But I mention it whenever I can because people tend to forget that this is a factor. There is no such thing as one size fits all (average realm comes closest). Guys will often do the whole "vaginas deepen when her muscles relax as she gets aroused so she can take anything". That's like saying that because all guys get bigger when hard, they can all reach any size - completely untrue. Like with any other body part there are absolutely differences not just in appearance and tightness but also in general shape and length. So what one woman thinks is barely even relevant to what the next woman thinks. For the record I do know that there is no significant correlation between general height or body type and vagina size, just like with men and their dick.

>>17855949
Little that you can do other than optimize the way you satisfy her afterwards to end it on the most pleasant (or least tiring) note for you. Yeah there are guys who unironically do this but it creates resentment and it is pretty damaging to the woman's libido if sex isn't a great experience for her.

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Girls what would you choose guy 1 or 2
Guy 1
> is in college for I.T
> wired hobbies
> doesn't pay for dates
> really good sex
>10/10 attractive
> has broken your heart before.
> distant enjoys alone time
> less alpha
Guy 2
> 4/10 skeleton skinny
> good career can support himself already
> pays for dates
> clingy
> won't give oral because hates it
> talented in music
> same hobbies
> drinks everyday
> more alpha

Girls

Is it actually ok to kiss you on the first date, or is that just more of a meme?

>>17856005
First guy, unless he is an insufferable asshole.
Second guy sounds terrible. Bad sex, ugly, drinker and clingy.

How often are "confessions" done these days? Like love letter asking you to meet somewhere?

If a stranger said, he liked you and asks you to go out with him, would you?

>>17856031
No. No. No.

First, who the hell are you? Why should I waste my time on a person I don't know?
Second, how do you know you like me if you are a stranger? What are you basing your idea of myself on? Why are you so attracted to me if you don't even know me?

Confessions are cringy.
Love is mutual. What you are feeling is an infatuation and I sure as fuck wouldn't want to be aware of it.

>>17854910
Different person here. Not saying this to be a dick just honest, you're hopelessly thick and it doesn't look like you're going to make any progress if you don't understand the advice you've been given. Its really plain and simple bud. Back out.

>>17856042

Why should I back out? She went to bed last night, but asked me if I could text her tonight

To women:

I'm getting vibes from my pregnant fiancee that she wants to break up with me. What are some general things I can do to prevent a break up at this stage? What are some things I can do/things a woman would respond to at this stage that would make me more appealing/attractive?

Males, and I guess non-sperglord females, how do I fix this?
>In a cold weather area
>Guy that gets on the same train into the city as me always keeps his face wrapped in a scraf, wears sunglasses all the time, and a hat often.
>Might take off some on the train.
>Is drop dead gorgeous.
>Stand in his general vicinity every morning.
>After two months of this, make a point to say "Good morning."
>He smiles at me, but doesn't say anything else.
>"Awwww, he's shy."
>Make a point to say good morning to him everyday.
>Sometimes talk to the side of his head.
>He never says anything, reacts very seldom
>Extra cold this morning.
>Decide to make a move because 21st century
>Nudge up against him and ask how he stays so warm in this weather.
>He turns his head and leans away.
>Pulls scarf down and scowls at me.
>REMOVES EARBUDS
>"Can I help you?" in an almost furious tone.
>Just stare with my jaw on the floor.

Three months. Three months with that scarf and I never saw his earbuds or even a wire. I got on the train, sat down, and stared at the floor. Some old lady thought I was sick. I've been nauseous all day. Is it time to change my name to Ann Hero?

>>17856064
Scare her by telling her how little you think of single mothers

>>17856075

Maybe he has a girlfriend?

>>17856075
>>He smiles at me, but doesn't say anything else.
>>"Awwww, he's shy."
No, he's not lol
You are bothering him. The guy is clearly not interested.

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>>17856075
some guy would appreciate your forwardness. Like Fassbender in Shame.
He'd need to be sexually attracted to you just by looking though.
I don't think that happen often on the train.


You can say hi to him again next time, see how he reacts. The first time he's annoyed, I would be annoyed too when some stranger enters my personal space.

>>17856036
Don't everyone start off as strangers?

Do you have to first become a friend before lover these days? Isn't this how "friendzone" are created in the first place?

>>17856075
Wow that's embarrassing. Sorry anon.
Tbh he sounds ultra snobby anyway because most guys would be happy if a girl randomly tried to talk to them on the bus. I say don't stop being forward but maybe reach for someone who seems a little more open and attainable.

>>17856120
No, it is not normal to have feelings for a stranger.
You don't need to be close friends with someone before dating them, but of course it's idiotic to say you love a person you don't even know.

Also - I have no interest in being approached by a stranger in my daily life. If you want to approach a woman in your daily life, be friendly at first and eventually be more and more flirty. People want to be valued as human beings, no one I know likes the "You have a nice body, I'd love to stick my dick in it" approach.

>>17856143
>no one I know likes the "You have a nice body, I'd love to stick my dick in it" approach.
But that's how everyone does it at bars don't they?

If a guy from your college asks you out, and you're single and not dating, wouldn't you atleast be curious?

Seems weird that you need both people to be in love with each other to date. Whatever happened to taking a bit of risk and finding out who the other person is through dates?

@women
In your mind is a dude being completely hairless below the head super weird or just unusual?

>>17856031
Hell no. I'd be terrified to know someone has been watching me and not speaking to me. That's creepy.

>>17856064
>I'm getting vibes from my pregnant fiancee that she wants to break up with me.

Well, what kind of vibes?
Maybe it's a long shot but it's possible you're just paranoid

>>17856031
If he was a familiar stranger..it would depend if I felt the same or not

>>17856064
Oh, this is a somewhat common thing, anon. It's the whole hormone craze, everything you do is exponetialized by a thousand.
You have to figure out what is it you're doing that is annyoing her. Perhaps you're doing too much and she feels like she needs space, or you're doing too little, and she feels like you're slacking or that you will be a bad parent. Certainly she has complained about something, what is it?

>>17856164
But thousands of people already watche you on your facebook, yet don't speak to you. Doesn't that creep you out?

>>17856156
In my daily life I don't want to be approached, at a bar is acceptable (even if that kind of approach is still cheap in my opinion).
Different situations have different social rules, for the same reason why it is cool if my boyfriend touches my boobs but if that guy on the bus does it, it is rape.

And, yes - both people need to find each other attractive and interesting to date. I have absolutely no interest in dating someone I am not attracted already. I won't discover he is attractive after a few dates.

Also - confessing love and asking out is different. If someone told me they loved me and I didn't know them, I would be creeped out.

>>17856167
Ofcourse its not like some random person, but chances are these things would mostly be co-workers/students/etc

Completely random people confessing random people are not happening in reality.

>>17856075
Ok, so you made a mistake and you found out scarf guy isn't friendly. That's ok. Just next time you talk to someone make sure they're listening. And if they don't react, do not continue.
It's embarrassing, sure, but not a big deal, anon.

>>17856171
>select 78 friends I actually know and care to keep in touch with
>very rare posts, open only to them
Your point?

>>17856159
It's preferable. I hate hair.

>>17856187
So its just you and the minority.

Majority of people don't limit their facebook profile to only their friends.

>78 friends
kek

>>17856191
If you say so.
I have never come by a profile in which people display pictures from their grandma's birthday party to strangers though.

>>17856164
I prefer to watch rather than to talk to girls, especially the hot ones.
But yeah I would never confess anyway so that's not my problem. Perhaps I'm lucky but the girl I was attracted to initiated contact, she touched my hand when she handed me my assignment, so I just smile and respond to her. We went on two dates after that, sex on the third date, how typical, eventually the more I get to know her the less I am attracted to her, so it just makes me prefer to not talk to pretty girls. I like them better that way, I can even jerk off to them. I am aware that this is pathological.

>>17856164
If people didn't want to be watched, then they shouldn't be so sexy/outstanding.

>>17856217
kek

>>17856217
This kind of guy is what I would expect from having a stranger confessing feelings after having watched me.

>>17856231
I still don't get it. Why would you feel creeped out by some stranger asking you out and saying they find you attractive.

If you didn't want to told that, shouldn't you, you know, not go out in public?

>>17856234
>shouldn't you, you know, not go out in public?
wtf

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>>17856240
or wear this you little slut

>>17856019

anyone?

>>17856019
REALLY depends on how the first date goes.
My boyfriend kissed me at the end of our first date but we were both really attracted to each other and had strong chemistry.
Our first date was a coffee at 9 AM in the morning and I couldn't leave till 6 PM because it was perfect.
On a regular date, no, I don't want to be kissed.

So I have this lady friend I've known for a few years that I fancy and would like to get more intimate with, but not necessarily interested in relationship. She's pretty shy and inexperienced, might even be virgin (don't really talk about such things). I know she's single and not seeing anyone atm. How do I start the convo and not freak her out?

>>17856113
So would bringing him a coffee as an apology tomorrow be okay? He sometimes has a cup from the station coffee place.

Is there anyway to recover? I'd like to give him the benefit of the doubt that he isn't an ass and was just startled.

Tindr/grindr/blahblahr are all "lets have sex" app right? How do I actually find a pure girl instead of shitty slutty girls who simply crave dicks?

>>17855070
i mainly want sex

>>17856019
Yes it's okay. Check her body language. If she's laughing a lot and touching you, complementing you a lot throughout the date you should absolutely kiss her at the end. If it's sort of awkward, nobody's talked a lot and she's acting cold do not kiss her. Go with what feels right at the moment, you can usually tell when someone would like to be kissed.

>>17854636
Yup, I'm a femanon.

>>17856270
>He sometimes has a cup from the station coffee place.

kek how old are you and how long have you been stalking this guy.

Start with basic greeting first, when you know his name and he knows yours, and some basic information, you can try offering him coffee. lol

>>17856262

hm, ok so it'd be best to wait until the 2nd one?

>>17856263
As a follow up, not looking for "how do I get her to have sex with me" answers, since I don't believe in The Game bullshit. Just tips how to approach the issue in a careful manner, because I value the friendship and don't want to ruin it by scaring her, but also don't want to miss the opportunity if she's open to it.

>>17856275

All women crave dick. Pure girls don't exist. Even the cute innocent looking girl your see, she might not be a slut who fucks everyguy she can, but you should know that when she's behind closed doors with a guy she likes, she does crazy shit

>>17855873
You'll want an asexual girl or at least a girl with a low sex drive. They're a lot more common than asexual boys, so you're lucky!

>>17856297

Asexuality is a 4chan meme

>>17856295
Liberals pls go

There are pure girls out there. You trash slut lovers pls die.

>>17856300
Okay, how about then just a low sex drive girl.

>>17856306
It's amazing pol and r9k can be so bitter and cynical and yet so delusional and naive.

>>17856306

I'm not liberal. and I don't love sluts.

I'm just speaking the truth. I met a girl just a few months ago. She was really cute and the shy type. But also a bit nerdy. We talked for a few weeks and flirted. One day we started talking lewd to each other, and it got really lewd FAST. I'm not joking, but this girl literally said she wanted my cock down her throat. she said she wanted me to cum in her throat. Not her mouth, but her throat.... I made a joke and said "damn... you talk as if you've been with a lot of guys.." she said "no, honestly I haven't. I don't sleep around, just when I'm with a guy I like I can get really crazy"

>>17856310

now that is possible

>>17856317
>I don't sleep around
>just when I'm with a guy I like
So she's slept with plenty of guys right?

>>17856324

I don't think she's done random sex, I think it's just been sex within relationships. I know she's been through a few relationships, so obviously she's done some crazy shit with those guys in the past

>>17856270
>So would bringing him a coffee as an apology tomorrow be okay?
No. That would be very weird. It's a very small incident that hardly deserves anything further than a simple sorry.

>>17856329
So whats the definition of slut?

10+ sex partner?

Is pure a <10 sex partner for you?

When I ask for pure, I mean, only single person. As a pure person, I seek only other pure people, not dirty sluts.

>>17856270
NO
just keep saying good morning. Just try to make eye contact, smile, and nod

>>17856335

well here is something you should think about. Assume we are talking about a 25 year old girl....

(Most) people get into their boyfriend when they are still really young at ages between 15-16. Girls will experiment with their boyfriends because it's so new to them. During high school. a girl could go through like what... 3-5 boyfriends? It's more than likely they've had sex with them. not hook ups or random sex, but we are just talking about within a relationship. Then they graduate high school and go to uni. Spend 3-4 years there. Probably have another boyfriend or 2.

i'd assume it's likely (most) 25 year old girls have had at least 7 boyfriends in their lives. so you can be sure that she's had sex with them at some point.

If you want a "Pure" girl who's never touched a guy, go to church.

>>17856335

A slut is a girl who just wants dick. A slut is someone who goes to the bar for the sole purpose of a ONS.

If a girl is in a relationship and works her pussy with her boyfriend every single day, that doesn't make her a slut.

>>17856335
A slut is any girl that doesn't sleep with you.

>>17856075
>>17856270
Jesus, get a grip on yourself girl. I applaud your spirit but this crosses some boundaries here. Yes girls can initiate but the reason he was so pissed off (he was dickish about it regardless, though) is that you ignored countless non-verbal signals that he was not interested. You said hi for a whole month despite him never reciprocating? Yeah some people are shy but there's typically other signs (blushing, looking at you a lot, standing near you for no reason a lot) that give their interest away. This guy gave you no signs of anything but being cordial and disinterested.
Not even going to get into talking to the side of his head and not getting discouraged that you thought he chose not to answer in any way, shape or form.

DO NOT get him coffee. DO NOT go near him again. Smile/nod when you happen to run into him and it would be weird not to acknowledge that you know each other, that's all.

Learn a lesson from it, but that's all you can do. No point in beating yourself up over it but really look back at your own actions with what I said in mind and realize why you should pay more attention to what signs people give you in the future.

>>17856159
Yeah that's not attractive to me at all. Not particularly weird just a turn off. As you can tell it's subjective though.

>>17855261
For the most part I don't think they think about it very hard, they just want to get laid

To Women:

How do I tell if someone is flirting with me

>>17856019
I know I wouldn't want that. Even if it was good

>>17856351
>Girl in her 25s
>atleast 7 boyfriends
Damn America, why are you all so fucked up and slutty? Here in xyz, our girls here have maybe 1-2 different sexual partners by that age. The 5+ thing is mainly a workaslut thing. Mainly a cultural thing.

>>17856353
Women are sluts if they've had multiple sexual partners

>>17856363
Stop living in your library bubble liberal trash

>>17856404
I was being sarcastic.

>>17855900
He's way too naive and honest to be manipulative. I think he's just too honest and also he may be projecting a bit..
No, actually my body is kind of an hourglass shape, but I agree that I'm very sedentary and I have a gut.
I'm an artist so I spend countless hours sitting down and nothing else.
Still, I don't know why would someone date someone whose body they don't like, because I was like +10 kg more when I met him

>>17856390
Alright first a bit of introduction. Flirting itself is a really specific type of interaction that can sadly take many forms. Like having sex, it is highly personal and most people only feel at ease with certain varieties.
Basically you need to see flirting as playing around for adults. What you are essentially doing is interacting with someone in such a way that they realize you noticed them in a personal way, but without showing your cards and spelling out exactly what you want from them or how exactly you feel about them.

The most vanilla way of doing this is by simply not hiding the natural signs of sexual interest like we usually do in everyday interactions. This means making prolonged eye contact, smiling and laughing more than you usually would, sitting closer, touching that person for every excuse you can find, turning your whole body towards them or even leaning forward, flushing in the face, and yes playing with hair (or other ways of fidgeting) or biting/licking lips, looking at the mouth of the other person or at their body/crotch.

BUT as I said above there are many different expressions to this interest. Obviously there's the ladies' men and gentlemen's women who just go for full on sexual innuendos, sly erotic touching, making sure that person glimpses some cleavage... pretty overt sexual interest. This takes a lot of confidence. More people flirt by being romantic: they give that person lots of compliments, go out of their way to make life easier for them (bring along coffee for them when they get it for themselves, for example), are grateful for excuses to give little gifts.

>>17856409
Other people feel uncomfortable with that kind of attention and instead get kind of feisty and snarky when they like someone - you have to kind of see this as male banter, it's not about the words at surface level but about the underlying implication that it doesn't matter that you talk shit to them because you both know you like them at the end of the day. It's also a very informal way of reaching out and connecting with someone, and can be quite playful and get you riled up. A different category is people who don't actively flirt like this but become snarky as a defense mechanism because they feel embarrassed/vulnerable for liking someone and try very hard to hide it.
And then there's the people who would really like to flirt but actually shut down when around someone they like, who -don't- make eye contact, touch everyone -but- you, become -more- quiet around you and so on.

So how do you know if it takes so many different shapes? My rule of thumb is, whenever this person treats you in an odd way, you notice that they treat you differently from other people etc... ask yourself, could it be that they're flirting? Or not even consciously flirting but displaying interest without being able to help it?

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>>17852983
there is this girl at my work who I flirt with constantly. we go back and forth and its all in good fun, but I know if I made a move she'd want it.
Only problm is she jumps around from guy to guy a lot. She was doing this same thing to another guy I work with, even set up a date and then at the last minute cancelled, to go back out with her then ex. they break up and make up all the time. Now shes "seeing" another guy I work with and flirting with him too. Im not jealous, but Ive never had a steady GF and it seems like there is a chance in front of me that im overthinking not to take
My dick says yes, but my brain says no. Am I overthinking it? This is open to either gender

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>>17856428
Most importantly, how's her feet?

>>17856426
Having said that I reckon that you were looking for all around pointers that a girl is interested in you, so here you go - look for patterns, not for whether or not she does anything featured on this list;
>she asks for your opinion on how she's dressed/groomed
>she is very interested in what (haircuts, formal wear, whatever) you like on women, and your "type" in general - bonus points if you notice she adjusts something to match your preference
>she gives you time intensive gifts (particularly if this is not the norm for her) like baked goods or a homemade card
>she has an uncanny memory for trivial shit you told her
>she sort of low key "forces" inside jokes, nicknames, similarities... often points out stuff you have in common
>jokes about sex, marriage ("boy, we could NOT raise kids together!" "we sound like an old married couple!")
>when she's around friends/colleagues when you see her, they seem to share some inside joke or her friends act gleeful - bonus points if the friends are obviously being weird but she completely ignores it herself
>goes out of her way to mention being single ("I'm really living up to my old cat lady thing here!")
>she does couple-y stuff like send you a poem, a good night or good morning text, random "just thinking of you" or "I saw this and it reminded me of you" texts
>sending you pictures of "something else" (like her cat) where she happens to look quite flattering (doesn't matter if she's hardly in view, she micromanages that shit)
>she is instant to defend you, bonus points if she even overreacts to a playful insult
>she's playing with her hair (grown women tend to learn not to fidget and go for the more subtle tying it up or wearing it down in front of you to draw attention to it)
>try talking to her when your hands are on your desk or something, then abruptly change position so they are relatively near to your crotch - promising if she looks, even better if she starts following your movement then stops herself

>>17856031
It really depends on how much exposure you guys have had to each other.

I know this is a young example, but it's the exact reason it was drawn out so long. I had an attraction to a guy about 2 or 3 grades higher than me for several years and admitted it to him when he was graduating. I just approached him at the end of the day and told him how I had a crush on him for a thousand years and he actually gave me his number, and we dated for 4 months until it ended out he had to move.

So it basically entirely depends on how you approach it

>>17856433
actually 8/10 feet. Im a footfag too and have been subtly able to see them and bring them into conversations

>>17856169
This is who you need to listen to. You wife is fucking PREGNANT

Guys,

How often does the average single man masturbate?

If I talk to a guy in the afternoon, what are the chances that he has pleasured himself that morning or will pleasure himself later that night?

>>17856428
Definitely no. Brains exist for a reason, you already know the answer and what you want.

guys,

I'm talking to a guy friend that i'm interested in. He is in the army right now so we can't see each other. We talk on the phone maybe twice because of his busy scheduled and we text a little bit every few days. Thing is he would bring up for me to give him a massage. I think he is flirting, but does this really mean he is expecting sex sometime soon? when i met him before he left, he didn't act at all like he wanted sex so maybe i'm reading this wrong. How do i know if he wants a massage, or a massage that may lead to something else?

how do women feel about people who have not made any progress in 5 years

no job, no educations

>>17856535
Pretty high.
If you are timing it so that he thinks about you when he jerks off then you might be in luck, just makes sure you are the only attractive female he interacts with, otherwise all bets are off.

>>17856535
I'm not average, but a neet.

I masturbate atleast twice a day on average

>>17856567
he said he wants a massage?

Anyway if he has been in the army for an extended period of time he will either wants some pussy or already taken some dick, which best describes your man?

>>17856567
>guy friend

>friend

>wanting sex

If he wanted sex he would've asked you out already.

>>17856567
as a man i just want sex. i would never outright ask for it but i do want it. he may not have sex at the end of the rainbow, i know i didn't think about it when i was with my girlfriend, but any man would appreciate sex is all i have to say about it

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>>17856581

T-that's not my plan!

Do guys do that? Like with girls they know??

>>17856263
So this probably got lost in all the wank-talk, but any girl care to give an opinion?

>>17856567
>single women
>single man
>hasn't had sex with xyz months
If he isn't seeking out sex with other women right now and has been free for a while, chances are you're his aim.

Unless he's asexual and purely want a platonic friendship.

>>17856595
>with girls they know??
the hot ones yes
Doesn't even have to be acquaintance or friend

>>17856601

Hmm I'm similar to her and if I don't bring up sex with a guy I probably don't want to do it at all. I'd play it safe and forget about it.

>>17856595
I only do it to anime girls.

>>17856609

So if you're not hot, you're "safe," so to speak?

>>17856567
>He is in the army right now
He is dealing with some serious sexual frustration right now. He's talking to you as an outlet.

>>17856616
....

Maybe, I am not very sure, it might not be entirely about look, because there are things that you do with him that could be perceived as hot. I've masturbated to a completely average looking girl who just happens to touch me when we sit next to each other, and didn't think any thing sexual about another traditionally pretty girl who I usually talk to.

>>17856612
So are you usually the one who brings up the topic of sex with a guy if you're at all interested? Tbh that doesn't sound very shy at all.

>>17856580
Progress means lots of things.
>Mental health
>Hobbies (music? art? programming? anything?)
>Social health

etc etc

What's your reason? Have you been trying for a job? How do you afford being a NEET? Do you live on your own or in your parents' basement? Are you depressed? Are you going to therapy? What's your goal in life, regardless of what you've done in the past? What do you want to do? What do you dream about?

There is someone i am pretty sure of she likes me, i am not attracted to her but she seems like a nice person, should i go for it regardless?

>>17856632
I agree with you. I don't ever talk about sex with guys that I'm not dating, regardless if I like them or not.

>>17856535
3 times a week, but I'm not watching porn anymore.

I have an unrealistic high expectation of what I want in a girl

>cute
>loli
>likes anime
>not a slut (as per above's definition)
>shy (obviously)
>wants someone to love her (but too shy)
Does she exist?

>>17856616
Not really, the best of part of imagining sex is not even the person itself but the act, and you don't need to be a model to be sexy at that time, if you're not hideous I'd masturbate to you.

>>17856642
So how would you want a guy you like but aren't dating to approach the topic of having sex with you?

>>17856641
Maybe, how are you in terms of looks? How is she?

>>17855948
I talked to her about it, she said she's sorry she couldn't be a better gf. I think she's just naive, doesn't seem like she's doing it out of any ill intent. Also she pushed me away when I tried to touch her down there lol seems like this is gonna take a few days.

>>17856648
She exists, but why would she date you?

I'm not saying that to be bitchy, just pointing out that a girl like that is able to date all sorts of handsome, accomplished and charming guys... I obviously don't know you but you can't expect someone like that to in return fall for you just because you're a decent person or would treat her well or something. Which is a sentiment I encounter a lot.

>>17856655
I consider myself average which i am happy with, i get enough attention from women but what's a pretty face if the personality sucks? She is a little below average i would say.

>>17856395

So when should I?