Didn't see one in the catalog

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I need to find a job. Fast. I've got enough money to support myself for another two weeks and then i'm done. I'll lose everything. The last two months of searching have not been fruitful in the slightest but I still have hope!

the hardest part of depression is scheduling your suicide so no one thinks it's their fault

I want to be done drinking, every time I've been drunk recently I've made a total ass out of myself and I can rapidly see myself turning into the bitter, angry drunk.
But I know I won't succeed. I know I'm already crutched and crippled.

I don't know what happened, or what ever.

But the girl who I've been into for months agreed to go out with me over break. This is after she claimed that she was busy twice before when I tried.

Maybe she was actually busy? Maybe she was too nervous? Who knows. But I am getting a shot with her.

And I wanna do something nice with her for this

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>>17834779

stand her up

DO IT

>>17834758
you can easily be bitter and angry while sober
i believe in you

>>17834789
>stand her up


Fuck that

Even though I've seen a massive improvement in my social life I have never felt more lonely. I just feel like everyone just puts up with me and will ditch me the moment they find someone better. Sometimes I think I was better off when I knew everyone hated me.
On the other hand, it might be my hormones and lack of sleep making me disproportionately upset.

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>>17834789
>you can easily be bitter and angry while sober
this is weirdly motivating

I feel like I'm falling apart.

>>17834723
Hurry and get a retail job for holiday hours. Work like no tomorrow when you get it and hopefully they keep you.

>>17834858

I have applied everywhere. I think my former employer is slandering my name which is causing me to have a rough time finding a job.

Jesus christ I'm scared.

>>17834865
print your resume out and go to places in person if possible. It really works

>>17834865
try a temp agency
they had literal hobos working at my store

>>17834871

Been doing that alongside online applications. Haven't had a single call yet.

>>17834874

Never thought of that. I'll check to see if there are any temp agencies in my area. Thanks!

I can't say positive things anymore because if I do it would create expectations I need to live up to and that takes a toll on my confidence.

Do you ever think on the good times?

After all I have done for you, it breaks my heart.

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I support fighting crime. Abort Black Infants

The guy I'm into doesn't return my feelings though I've accepted that for years, but recently I found out he has a girlfriend.

We had agreed to meet today and he was half an hour late. His hair was wet and he had that good disposition people seldom have in the morning, which makes me associate it with that satedness you get post-fucking. Whatever he was doing he wasn't rushing to see me.

There's no amount of alcohol or drugs I could take because in the end I'll still remember and nothing can erase meeting him. Worst is I still have to see him on a weekly basis. I just hope I gather some courage soon and finally off myself.

I've gotten really into Oathbreaker since their new album came out but I keep remembering that you liked them first and I probably said they were shit, or more likely said nothing and thought it.

I created a secret, at Instagram to keep tabs on what my crush likes and who she's following.

I'm disgusted for reaching this level of low

Wow, that guy? Really? When you first told me about him I didn't find him a threat at all. He's considerably older looking and not in an attractive "suave" kind of way. More in a balding, beer belly, ugly as fuck face kind of way. Seriously, you told me about him and I saw his face instantly dismissing him.

It can't be him though. Can it? I can't imagine you going for such a downgrade. I'm fucking gorgeous, great hair, chiseled facial features, perfect angular nose, piercing light blue eyes, and can grow a fucking killer beard. I lost so much weight since we've last been with another and I told you that was what was going to happen. Shit was rough back then for me.

This guy, he looks like a balding 90's troll. Head round like an orange, receding hair line, and his face looks like a plastic figurine that's been microwaved.

I guess the guilt you see when you look at me is what turned you off.

I feel dreadfully alone. My housemates are all retarded sour-faced cunts, my coworkers think I'm an idiot, my friends don't like me enough to come out for a drink so I can drown my sorrows, and my family make me feel guilty for having problems.
The one person I thought really understood me has been progressively growing to hate me for the past 6 months, and when I finally told her that I'm in love with her, I found out that she feels nothing for me and she has recently begun dating someone else.
I don't know how to stop feeling all of these emotions. I just want to stop feeling anything ever. I might throw myself off a tall cliff before long.

>>17835123
What fucking good times?

You lied about so many fucking things that it's impossible to tell if you meant any of it at all. The only good times that were definitive were sexual related. The shows, vids, pictures, and cams but it turned out you were sharing those all with more than one guy.

So no, I don't. The only reason you're ever in my mind is when I think of all the unanswered questions. That's it. You were an abusive, manipulative, terrible piece of shit.

I seriously wouldn't think of you at all if I knew the extent of your whoring. You want to know why? Because the kind of person that wouldn't at least give a man that treated them as amazing as I did closure, that you wouldn't give me even that little bit of respect, is why there are no good times. You clearly never meant anything you ever did to me if you can't give me that.

Why do you want to make me suffer. I'm insane right? if I kill myself I wouldn't go alone. Remember how much we talked about torture?

I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART, S!!!! I WENT THROUGH HELL WHEN YOU REJECTED ME! I FELT GRIEF, DESPAIR, ANGER, SADNESS, HUNGER, RESTLESSNESS, SORROW, MELANCHOLY AND NOW I'M DELIRIOUS TO COMBAT THE UGLY EMPTINESS YOU LEFT IN ME!! I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU HAHAJSGHJGHVFJKCIUF

FUCK YOU, GOD!!! YOU DID THIS ON PURPOSE

I like how she keeps telling you she didn't sleep with anyone else. Ask her ex about that. You know, are another dozen people.

I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART, S!!!! I WENT THROUGH HELL WHEN YOU REJECTED ME! I FELT GRIEF, DESPAIR, ANGER, SADNESS, HUNGER, RESTLESSNESS, SORROW, MELANCHOLY AND NOW I'M DELIRIOUS TO COMBAT THE UGLY EMPTINESS YOU LEFT IN ME!! YOU'RE THE BEST GIRL I EVER KNOWN AND I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU HMYUFYOJDTYDGHJGHVFJKCIUF

FUCK YOU, GOD!!! YOU DID THIS ON PURPOSE!!

I can't focus on anything, I keep getting distracted by games, movies, music, ...
How do you guys focus for example on school and exams?
(I study computer engineering, so I need my pc almost all the time)

Between Scylla and Charybdis: on the other hand I'm 24 and completely inexperienced in romantic matters and no girl will want me for that and I'm starting to accept this situation; and even some is willing to date me, after months or even weeks of unsatisfied sex with a clueless beta she will probably want some fresh dick with a guy who can make her pass out from multiple orgasms.

>>17835582
Or even worse, fresh dick just for novelty sake.

My gf of 1 month suddenly became very distant. She used to text quite a lot daily, now just a message or two a day. Ignores if I try to ask her to meet. Callef her and she'd just tell me she was taking care of business.

She has a 2-year old kid.

I just wish I'd know what's going on in her head ... I know I'm already overly attached and I should just wait or forget her. But I think of her all the time ...

I would appreciate any perspective on this

Being scared of losing her

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I'm caught between feeling like I'm a 19 year old kid just figuring shit out and feeling like a failure who will let everyone down.

My ex girlfriend was just asking me if I'd enrolled in classes yet, and I haven't, because I don't know what I want to do in college but I have to stay because it would be stupid for me to drop out and have my parents withdraw financial support and be stuck spending all my time working. I might as well stay and figure out what I want to do since I have the privilege of doing so. But my ex got into this whole why you suck speech about how she couldn't be with me because my parents wouldn't let me grow up by letting me fuck up by doing things like setting me up with advisors.

And I feel pathetic that I stayed with her for so long, and that I still hang onto the hope we'll get back together. She used to hit me and cheat on me, and tell me about how she cheated on me to punish me for things, and I just put up with it. I contemplated suicide because of how it made me feel several times over the course of months. But then she was finally the one who broke up with me. I could have just broken up with her. But I felt pathetic that as a virgin before her I couldn't satisfy her and as a younger guy she would just go to older men who were more experienced. But I was scared of losing her because of how attached I got. Of course the only pathetic thing was that I put up with physical and emotional abuse. But that's pretty pathetic in and of itself.

I know its not too late for me to make something out of myself, but right now I feel like shit. I guess I'll have to use that motivation to push me to make things better for myself. I've started dating a girl from another town, so I guess that's some progress from clinging to my ex. But I still dont have any skills career wise and I'm an absent minded, depressed mess. I chain smoke, drink heavily, and abuse my xanax prescription.

In the end it all falls back to me.
Why must everyone around me ignore and ridicule me but still depend on my help as shamelessly as they do.
I've been wronged enough, all of this is no longer my problem.
I just want it to start so I can go somewhere and be alone already.

>>17835767
It feels like it would be so much easier to just go howard hughes insane, never leave my room in my appartment, piss in bottles, watch movies all day, keep my phone off, and wait for someone to show up at my door and finally realize shit is not right. That right now feels much more preferable to having contact with the people who say they care about me so much but only berate me about how fucking awful I am when I'm just trying to get by and not hurt anyone. I just want everyone to get off my back.

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To the wife of the guy with a deformed limp dick he got from fucking that sleazy gook whore.

Contact that gook's BF she cheated on. Dude isn't a bad guy. He's actually really fucking awesome and he's just in shock in finding out how terrible people can be. Who him so heart, that in the end people do the right thing and I'm sure he will be super chill. Like, he will totally not say a word about the situation ever again. He doesn't give a fuck about that whore. It's his condition and uncertainty that hurts him.

>>17835560
Adderall

>>17835774
why so wronged anon

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Kind of an odd story, but I'll try to share as much as can. MFW this happened today

I'm a dedicated engineer for a international company, we have dept all over the world and I work with a lot of clients on certain projects for their businesses etc..

I am one of the most dedicated engineers actually, and work with this specific client on a lot of cases. Working with them this morning on something, and receive another email from acct. management that they're wondering if I have been informed on what is going on in the company and honestly I was on another meeting at that point and didn't respond/check the email. I'm starting to get new emails every couple of minutes from everyone in the company who is working/involved with this client/long term project. I'm off the call with the other client, and start checking emails, ok they've been planning this project internally in the company and didn't let me know, ok, email chain is actually from monday of this week, but thats ok, maybe they don't know that i work with this client on stuff like this and they forgot to include me? Responded to email, I'm personally on other project/upcoming meeting right now and can't make it to this meeting. Read down the emails from all upper management, and on catches my eye for some reason. As I work with this client extensively I am usually the second to know of what is upcoming and what is going on internally,

>>17835394
get cucked fag

>>17835808
Seriously, it's either that guy or the tiny little man.

either way...

This went from heartache to hilarious as fuck.

As I'm sure you know from fucking with my computer, you can see the type of women I can get.

Also, I didn't lose much. She clearly has no standards. Like... at fucking all. No wonder you're fighting so hard for her. She's clearly the best thing to ever happen to you.

Which again... how many other guys has she fucked? When you go down on her how many other guys's jizz do you swallow?

> Meet a girl at college, pretty chick, really thin, nice butt.
> I'm ugly as fuck but even so she was the one who ask me for my number.
> She become my GF, have a relationship of five years, now we live together
> I discover that she's really pervert and sweet at the same time. My fetish come true
> She and I love the idea of a threesome and usually we search for girls

together (still not have find a really nice one, only find really crazy jealous chicks)
> Have a really good relationship, trust, jokes and lot of wild and awesome sex.
> She went to a public bathroom two years ago
> BAM!, urinary infection
> Infection goes and come back every month
> I'm lucky for always wear a condom, she says she's happy because I don't suffer the same fate.
> Still bothers her health every month, she says hurts like hell.
> Five doctors, they doesn't know shit what is happening, even with expensive test and research
> She is depressed because doctors said no sex, not anal, not even masturbate.
> Cero fucking but damn infecction comes again, but she try to give her best
> Life goes on.
> Still she give me BJ, dance for me, give it all and she is still my sweet pervert GF
> Last night she break down, said she's scared, and she doesn't know if someday this shit will go away.
> And I'm motherfucking scared too because idk what to do
> But I can´t break down in front of her too
> She said that if I decide to go for another girl she will understand
> For the first time in five years I said I love her
> She cry and laught at the same time.
> I made my mind and know I want to marry her no matter what. More because of last night reaction.
> But I still don't know how to help her
> Even if she said that is ok if I dump her, I doubt I'll find another girl like her who like threesomes and the same trash than me.


If someone know a way to cure a brutal urinary infection comming from hell, plz tell.

>>17835830
Pretty cute desu, good you are staying

I counted certain men out from the running of her whoring but then I realized... no, they really were all fucking her.

She has such a fucked up view of sex. Thinks that the more sex someone has the greater their worth. She is 30 years old and still uses virgin as an insult. Shes a she. Saying she gets fucked a lot is not an accomplishment.

Thing is guys just don't like to share. A woman of worth is a woman that is loyal. A man wants a woman to be his whore and only his whore. A man will beat the shit out of another man for even thinking about his woman. He owns her and she is happy that.

if a guy runs into a woman at a coffee shop that brings him back to her place and will spread her legs without caring about using protection will make any real man disgusted. That woman is a cum dumpster. Your horny little boys are the ones that would dive right into that shit. Even then, they are smart enough to know that girl is nothing but a worthless whore.

Woman that easy is clearly mentally insane. Needs constant validation and she get's that validation through sex. Kind of whore that would fuck a man within 2 hours of knowing him without a condom does not give a fuck for herself. Shes basically saying "Please give me a lifelong disease for 15 minutes of meaningless sex."

And that guy will pull up his pants, say "thanks whore" and jet.

>>17834882
Tell me your employers name

>>17836021

The one that may be badmouthing me? They are my ex employer. I left that job two months ago.

Why did you wanna know the name?

>>17835827
paranoid and a cuck lol

>>17834700
I am ready to die but I'm scared of the pain. This country has no guns, and exit bag isn't an option.

>>17835394
lmfao wow. if all u can bring up is ur looks, no wonder she wants to cuck u faggot. but i'd fuck you for sure.

>>17836032
Something dumb

>>17836136
If you want to steal my idea hang yourself from a doorknob on new years eve
Make the floor slippery get a short thing to get around your neck and around your doorknob. Make sure everything is tight and the doorknob won't fall off and since it's new years eve nobody will be bothered by the noise and if they come to complain you'll be ded.
I'm at a point where I'm too pussy to actually stab myself because that would be too much but I think with hanging yourself the only really scary thing is the jump. It just takes faked conviction to jump or in my plan slip and end it all. So while dying would be painful and horrible it wouldn't really matter since I am dead and I don't have the escape options of calling a hospital with drugs or stabbing myself because once it's slippery sloping death is 100% certain.
Also new years eve is a good time because it's after the holidays so the family won't wonder where you are, for me at least the best time.

I don't like my new puppy. In fact, I'm starting to hate it and feel like shit for it.

My old dog was the best. Raised him since he was a pup too, and he was awesome. We'd wind each other up sometimes in a playful way but never hurt each other. We'd run around. He'd be happy to see me, wagging his tail, licking me. I fucking miss him so much. He passed away a couple of months ago and it's been devastating.

Walking into the house... it feels like someone stole everything because it just seems so empty without him. I've been suicidal since.

The new one bites, hard as it can, constantly. It fucking knows that it's wrong and that it hurts, because the only time it stopped biting me was 5 minutes ago, when I just left it in the kitchen and it whined because it didn't want to be alone.

It's just viscous and hateful. Shows no affection. It's nothing like my old best friend.

I'm feeling guilty as fuck, I encouraged my family to get a new dog. I feel like I've betrayed and replaced my old one. I feel like scum for not liking this one.
It doesn't like us, it tolerates us ~ and just barely.
It hasn't filled the hole, just tore it wide open.

I just scored my first ever date with an extremely gorgeous girl and I still have no idea how on Earth she said yes but I'm getting antsy because I'm a cuck and need somebody to whip some sense into me.

I asked her yesterday, she said yes, gave me her phone number, texted her today, it's been 3 hours and nothing. Look, I know that I am actually the autistic one here. Shit sometimes happens, and I have freaked over this stuff before (not even with girls) and I don't think once in my life it has ever turned out bad. Still, I have this voice of doubt in my mind that she won't respond and I'm doomed forever.

How do I tell this voice to fuck off?

>>17836192

Aluma Systems

Ugly chink ugly chink you's an ugly chink~

>Great song right? Lololololol

you lied about where he was mom. you lied about where that abusive bastard was. he's been here the whole time, he didn't lose all his hair and that was him following me around, and you're still defending him. He didn't lose his job and everything in his life, you lied about what's been going on.

getting my CC permit this week along with another extended clip to carry on me, and I'm buying a few 80% ghost lowers. you've been letting this asshole stalk me, slander me, and generally ruin my life. if he makes a mistake, I'll force a situation where shooting him is justifiable, then bring legal action against you for association.

>>17836205
Did you spoil your puppy?
Who held or saw the puppy first?
Do give it away, it's really messed up..
Try taking him to behavioral/training classes. Roll up a few news papers and gently slap his butt or say bad____, or don't do that, in firm voice, not baby voice.

You cheated on me, you didn't even tell me until you forced me to break up with you because you were too weak to do it yourself. After telling me you tried to be friends with me and I was not having it until you started threatening suicide, even then I would barely talk to you, and then you came to me with your love problems because the guy you cheated on me with had and still has a gf, and you're "in love" with him, but you fail to realize that he is just using you for your body and to dump all of his problems are but you continue to ignore that, and I couldn't take it anymore and blocked you weeks ago because you're so delusional, after all of this I honestly hope you do kill yourself, but I know you're too fucking weak to do it you whore. Fuck. You.

>>17836294
Wha the, what the, what the fucks wrong with you...

>>17835785
To you.

You're ugly as fuck and fyi to alot of people in modern times gook means chinky ching ching chinese scum because nobody cares for specific derogatory. Loooooooooser go kys.

>what's the difference? all asians look alike. -nonasianperson

Maybe now I finally understand you a little with the answers you've given me and everything I knew about you before. I don't really care that you don't care about me at all. Nor do I care what you think about me. I am selfless, but yesterday I had to be selfish in order to find peace within me. If you even stop for a moment to consider how patient and thoughtful I've been with you, maybe you can appreciate me a little. I truly hope that someday you will let someone in through the emotional barriers you've put up that stop you from experiencing greater happiness, joy and maybe even love. Perhaps you have too high ideals for a best friend or lover. Perhaps you have too thick of an emotional barrier and are afraid of getting hurt. Only you know yourself. I hope I'm wrong about you, but if I'm right, and what I see is a glimpse of your soul, then I wish for your happiness over my own. Thank you for saving me. I hope you save yourself. I will always care about you and be there for you, even if you'd rather talk to some mutant being made up of random animal parts! -Toshitaka :p

I wish I had someone to love.

I don't find women without makeup physically attractive. This worries me.

What am I supposed to say when your upstairs roomie says he heard our argument and me screaming at you about how I can't believe you cheated on me with these girls and then he says

"Yep, sounds just like him."

How am I supposed to believe you've changed when even someone who has known you for years and now barely talks to you is fucking telling me otherwise.

Holy shit.

>>17836348
It only hurts you and brings you down, stay alone.

>>17836324
j-ju-just e-ex-expressin' m-mu-mahself, niiiiiger~

>that's hip hop genre with alittle bit of scrillex
>first one was classic pop

>>17836309
the amount of fucking rage. the man beat you, and beat me, and lead to everything that's ever been wrong in my life and you're FUCKING HELPING HIM YOU STUPID STOCKHOLM SYNDROME CRAZY PERSON?! this is why I didn't want you to know where I lived or what I'm doing. fuck this.

>>17836351
I mean really at this point it's all out in the open and if you decide to keep going you're going to have to accept his cheating as a fact in your relationship.

you fucking insane bitch, do you have any idea what you've done?

my gun is now going with me everywhere and I'll make sure you know so you can pass that along to that violent asshole. what the fuck must be going on in your head, i can't fathom.

>>17836396
GODDAMN IT HE WAS OUTSIDE MY NEW FUCKING TOWNHOME YOU STUPID BITCH. THAT VIOLENT ASSHOLE WAS OUTSIDE OF MY FUCKING HOME AND YOU HELPED HIM. THE FUCK IS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM?!

the enemy is always the people closest, wtf.

>>17836334
>>17836164
>>17836113
same fag is same and mad.

Trust me, my looks are far superior in every way, not to mention my skills, personality, morals, and intelligence.

Being compassionate and empathetic does not make me weak nor a cuck. How old are you btw? 40? You seriously say cuck as a real insult? Her cheating on me doesn't make me a cuck, it makes HER a whore. Being empathetic to her disorder, understanding that she needs help, makes me by far the better man. Meanwhile, you use her, manipulate her, and are actively ruin her life.

I get emotional too. I do get paranoid as well. I'm self aware, something you and the others desperately lack.

Also, like I mentioned before. She was scared I would hurt the person she cheated on me with. She knows where we stand and you just aren't nearly as much a man. A man that could not defend his woman... that's just sad..

Lastly, understand the reasons she doesn't want to be with me has nothing to do with how awesome, you think, you are. When she looks at me she sees a good man, a brilliant future she fucked up, a man she hurt. Looking at me just reminds her how much she hates herself.

>>17836407
>>17836396
What are you talking about mang.

What violent asshole?

I mean, if he's stalking you just shoot him.

I bet he's bald too.

>>17836362
Ohhh I don't listen to them, sorry, I apologise, I though you were being a jerk, I was the jerk though..I apologise!

>>17836338
Arigato toshikata-san desu!
><3

>>17836421
Look blue eyed chiseled chess suave white guy don't embroil me in your samefag bs.

>>17836421
I know you guys are planning something. You're going to use the shit you stole. If you do... it just proves you're guilty.

Why? What the fuck is the point? What I wanted to know was the truth. I offered you countless opportunities to just tell me and I would go away. I wouldn't have told anyone anything. Not talked about it to my friends, family, anyone. I would have been "Thank you. Now I can move on with my unblocked mind."

Instead you continue to abuse a mentally ill man that was extremely good to you for all those years. That was loving ,patient, understanding, compassionate, and empathetic. That never returned the nasty as fuck insults, that never raised my voice back at you while you screamed at me. I did countless things for you while you did nearly nothing for me. You were doing this shit behind my back the entire time and yet... you think I deserve to be punished because I broke down?

You all gnored me for weeks. So long you lied when I asked you things and then wonder why I broke? A man can only take so much. I have been trying to talk to you for this entire time while you ignore me. I send you a message you go online to talk to your PI that you've dumped thousands of dollars into for no fucking reason.

Is telling me you're a cheater that important to you? Is it worth all that money? Committing felonies? To ignoring your psychiatrist, for doing things YOU KNOW you shouldn't be fucking doing?

You all might be legit psychopaths.

I know I'm mentally ill. That's the only reason I keep thinking about this.

Yet at the same time... did you forget last december? Did you forget that you were obsessed with me. For 6 entire months straight you posted nasty shit about me that were all fucking lies? Every single thing, a lie?

Then you begged for me to come back. I send you an email to please stop lying about me online and you go all soft eyed on me and say how you'll change. How you'll be a better love. That you will see a psych. be nice.

Today I failed an oral exam in about 15 seconds after not being able to remember a factual statement you could literally read off a diagram/tabel.

I realize that your kid is failing college and that you have a cancerous relationship with her probably and that you have to whine to students who come to an exam, but when you come pissed off to work determined to fail others because you have to display power because you feel powerless in your inabilities as a parent, then I wonder, how the fuck did you amount to that position or who in their right fucking mind put you in charge of that departement.

If all of my knowledge regarding a certain subject can be summed up as a question about memorizing a constatnt then you are a fucking joke.

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I have no self control
I'm about to drop under a 2.0 and school
I dont know what to do with my life.


On the other hand once schools out I plan on making videos for fun, buying a synth trying to make sounds i like, and going to the gym.

if im not Gohan in 2017 anons i might just end it, like i feel like i would fail in life.

thoughts?

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I'm 20 and very socially anxious. I don't take any meds. I'm supposed to start university in 3 months. I'm moving to a different country to attend a university in a language that I've been studying for a year. This was my own decision. But I feel like I will fuck up so bad. I'm afraid I won't make friends just like in high school. My face is below average and I'm skinny af. Depressed for the majority of time. I plan on earning some money after uni and to get a plastic surgery to make my face attractive and finally stop hating myself. I'm afraid if I'll even make it this far, and once I do and I realize the ones that are born ugly stay ugly forever, I will take my own life because I won't be able to take the self-hate anymore. I'm afraid.

>>17836522
I never wished her any harm. Not once.

She needs help. She's dangerous. Many innocent people have suffered because of her and when I said something it saved many more. It's illegal to do what she did, you realize this all of you? If not for what it is by state law, then at the very least is can be considered assault. She willingly withheld that information. She knew and said nothing on purpose. I'm sure the innocent wives, girlfriends, and others are damn glad someone said something.

She doesn't have to worry about transfer though, right? To fall in love with her saviors?

She needs fucking help. She needs to be checked into a fucking institute. She needs to stop fucking lying to everyone, including herself. She's delusional. She's insane by definition. She is dangerous.

>>17836528
Gohan is a weak pussy now. Why'd you wanna be him?

>in highschool I barely got kissed
>never had a serious female friend
>take a year free before going to college because no money for college
>no human contact for what now have been 6 months except some of my family
>afraid that once I finally go to school I'll lose my social skills so much I won't be able to make friends or get a girlfriend

I don't know what to do, I wish i could start college already, being alone is horrible.

>>17836321
>Did you spoil your puppy?

Yes, both of them.

>Who held or saw the puppy first?
My mother.

>Do give it away, it's really messed up..
The rest of the family has grown attached, and I'm hoping that it's viciousness is just a phase as it's still young and teething. Plus, I hope that it's me just missing my old dog, and being a cunt, and that once I spend more time with it, I'll like it.

>Try taking him to behavioral/training classes. Roll up a few news papers and gently slap his butt or say bad____, or don't do that, in firm voice, not baby voice.

Yeah, we try. It's learning, slowly.
I think walking away from it and leaving it in the kitchen when it bit me taught it to stop. It didn't bite me after that and is sleeping now.

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>>17836556
I mean like pre-cell

I was tripping awhile ago and deeply connected with the show. Growing up I always liked characters like Cell and Vegeta but now realize they were probably bad role models since they always either job or fail.

It was during the cell fight and it kept showing Gohan train and giving it his all and acid me said that needs to be real me.

>>17836528
I can't give you any advice other than tell you that I know how you feel. All of my high school I felt the same way you did, I couldn't study for shit, even if you held me at gunpoint. It still didn't change and I feel the same. Only once I'm pressured and I able to do what I need, usually with very little time left. I don't know the answer.

>>17836579
Yeah, the cell murdering Gohan was a badass.

I fucking hate this world. Despite trying time and time again I get fucked over by it. I'm done with this bullshit. I can't wait til the holidays are over, I'm killing myself on New Years.

>>17836591
cell-murdering

>>17836584
I'm in college now. so yikes.

I've kind of come to hate my town and everyone around me though. I smoked too much weed with my friends and now im nowhere. My freinds are cops but the ones that comeback remind me that all my friends want to do is smoke weed and do nothing.

I'm just hoping its not hard to bring my GPA up and next semester i can isolate myself from that and use the pressure to get out of this suburbian hellhole

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>>17834700

ok

I learn to live with the fact that I'm unattractive male who never be love.

I now enjoy the single life, more time for friends,family and hobbies

>>17836593
Anon no one says you have to fully like this world, this world is really shitty.

Whats important is that you like yourself and find things you like to do. The ability you have to throw your life away is the same ability you have to just go out and try to be what you want.

I am angry and sad with me today. While lessons has been learn.
This feeling is really bad, and it gets me anxious and that makes me eat more. Gained some pounds last week that didn't help my self esteem either. If I continue this way i might get more depressed.

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>>17836621
Have you considered the gym? Remember this feeling and how you naturally react. Catch yourself in the act and try to resist

Seriously anyone with another typo or shit grammar I'm going to call a chink.

>>17836467
>>17836606
CHINK!!!

>>17836603
good luck mate, hope you do well

>>17836571
That's good that at least your dogs still learning.

>>17836613

Yah I've lost interest in everything. Everything bores me. only thing I wanted in life was to have a decent job to support myself. But I can't even manage something everyone just takes for granted.

>>17834779

I'm still kinda in shock that she said yet to meet up over break.

I really hope that it goes through, and we end up in a relationship

/lit/erati are surprisingly chill when it comes to grammar. Not nearly as grammar nazis as i was expecting.

Saying this here because >>>/lit/ doesn't have a gioyc thread.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

If I find out who was in my house right after she died
I am going to end it

>>17836842
Hey, we just want to shitpost about the Greeks and DFW in peace.

>>17836639

fuck you
yellow nigga!

>>17834700
I really want to ask this girl out, it's pretty obvious that she likes me back, I just never can bring myself to ask her out.

i know u don't owe me anything but i wish i had a better idea of what you're thinking

>>17836555
holy shit you need help. cut contact with this person and get mental help. omg. can't believe you thought i was samefagging you earlier. lmfao. thanks for the updates tho. jesus christ, you've reminded me why i don't need toxic people in my life.

also, being single sounds amazing right now. bless this life.

>>17837048
You might be literally retarded.

>>17837080
and so are most of the people on this site and in this world.

ive only been married a year and im already bored of fucking/being around only my wife.

i miss dating.

i hate myself.

>>17836294
You're an ugly motherfucker. Hypocrite

>>17837109
>chink detected.
No you.

Saw the new thing you posted on your page. You so badly want to be someone you don't respect.

Makes no sense.

i'm only fucking him because it makes me want to die every time he touches me. grown-up self-harm. how pathetic

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I still remember how you looked that day in the field in the wildflowers wearing my hat with the feather in it, sun shining through your hair.

You're all I want in the world. I want to be with you in the purest sense. I was over you, recently. I'd moved on when we didn't talk much over the summer. But you kissed me at that party and now I'm reeling again, back to that spring day when I fell for you.

is that the same reason you fuck H?

You're not telling me because you're treating this as self harm as well. That I am the reminder of how fucking awful you are. That when I message you, you feel terrible and that's how you want to feel. Whenever you see me, whenever you see my work, whenever you see me in your work, it's like your soul is being cut.

This makes you feel better because you're in denial. You get relief the more you try to force yourself that you are just the shittiest cunt alive, and if you truly believed that you are a shitty worthless whore then you won't feel guilt.

That is some fucked up shit darlin. It's also true.

You're not going to be call 911. Tell them you need help. Tell them you hurt yourself. Get yourself to a mental hospital.

Don't come out until you feel like you won't do this shit anymore.

Sadly, I know you won't do it. Ignore everyone else. Listen to me for once. Just once.

>>17837155
>>/poltard detected

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I don't think I can handle my job now that christmas is here and the curve has just change dramatically at the end of November

>working nights so my sleep patterns fucked
>doing 12 hours (was originally 8) in a cold and dusty warehouse for 5 nights a week
>have to travel almost 2 hours just to get there and another 2 getting back home
>2x the amount of work is expected to be crammed in with those extra few hours and we're meant to ready up for at least 3x the normal expected rate of items

The only upside is the money is good and if I survive this shit, i'll get a raise in money once it hits mid January. I hate to be a quitter, but i'm on my last legs from this and its only been 2 weeks, how i'm going to survive the remaining month where it gets worse is beyond me.

It breaks my heart knowing you are so sick. That you are suffering so much from a disease of the mind. No one deserves that. No one.

I feel the same way someone would feel if a loved one was taken from them by cancer. A true love, someone I never thought I could care that deeply for has been taken from me by a disease. The woman I loved so deeply truly has died.

I know what it would feel to be in a zombie movie. Someone I loved is now an empty husk, a shadow of their former self walking the night.

I don't know exactly when everything went wrong. it could have been before we even began, during that event. Then again, I don't know your true past. I know it's all a lie. Those relationships never existed, I was your first. I truly was your first wasn't I?

>Like girl for a long time, finally in the same area again
>Lock down a date, have a great time
>Confess feelings, she says she feels the same way
>Kiss
>Two days later she says she actually likes another guy more

I can't handle this kind of crap anymore. Feels like every romantic endeavor I go for is like pushing a boulder up a hill. Why can't things be easier?

I don't think I can be a wholly emotional being without being drunk

>>17837401
do as you're told and you could.

>>17837442
Fuck you
You're either a regular person who is naturally handicapped
Or you're drunk like I am and has to deal with lessened faculties.

Fuck you

Do as I'm told
That has nothing the fuck to do how I feel

I did as I'm told and I'm the top of my fucking class
fuck you

>>17837451
sure you are.

Sure you are.

I lost my virginity today. It was with my roommate. Who has been in a relationship for four years, with my other roommate.

>>17834723
Babysitting?

I slept with my best friend's girlfriend for 4 months while I stayed with them. He never found out, I moved out, and they broke up a week after I left. During the whole thing I slowly developed feeling for this whore who outright told me it was him she truly wanted to be with. I did everything in my power to break them up after I left and had even contemplated murdering him while I was still there. I'm just going to greentext this in greater detail.

Sigh... tonight I install tinder.

I live in an Indiana town. Maybe I'll get myself a girl with a good lookin' momma that was never around. A girl that grew up tall, grew up right, perfect for an Indiana boy on an Indiana night.

>>17837547
You need to see a psychiatrist.

Not for your sake, however. For everyone else. You're a sociopath.

>>17834750
i know that fucking feel, man.
Really itching to do it now, but it'd be a dick move to ruin some peoples's christmas celebrations, right?

But if i go home for christmas, then do it when i get back, they'll probably feel like they "should have done something" or "should have seen what was going on" or whatever.

Tough choices.

>>17836613
>find things you like to do.
Easy to say, man. Hard to do.
Tried everything i can think of, and most of the things random strangers can think of too (bar the excessively expensive ones like "buy a 100-foot yacht").
"Do what you enjoy" is a little harder when you can't figure out what, if anything, you can still enjoy anymore.

Frogposters are cancer.

I hate my roommate.

I have to take sleeping pills to get any rest.

>>17834824
I like you

>>17837191
> grown-up self-harm
No, fucking around is what teenagers do. Being a whore is not for a woman out of college.

A grown up able to recognize they are self harming would be getting help. Real help. Not continue to do their childish behavior.

You are not a grown up. You're a child in a woman's body.

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I've succeeded. Hardly anyone talks to me anymore; quite the rarity when someone does. Nobody knows where I live. Nobody interacts with me except through the internet. I have no phone calls, no texts, and hardly ever an instant message; except over important matters. I know absolutely nobody on my "people you may know" feed (no have I for years) nor do I know any of the friends of my respective friends on facebook. Out of sight, out of mind. I don't really see people I know when I go out and about my small town - aside from the few in my graduating class I sometimes recognise. Most people who recognise me I don't know who they are.
I'm pretty much invisible now most of the time now. I feel most others who think of this as a kind of hell to be avoided. Not me. I just have to make sure to maintain myself. I need to read more so I'll still have the cognitive assets for communication. I still have to talk to people, too - for much of the same reasons of the aforementioned. I know I do not and cannot ever live in a social void without dire consequences to my intellect, speech and general ability to effectively communicate in any manner and medium.
I know I am just essentially an empty husk; however, at least I enjoy genuinely more things in life now. Now, sometimes, I actually feel some emotion. As if some things enter this husk and move it. I rather this than ever again trying to understand what moves or interests others - always attempting to understand it, but never emoting or relating to the drive of the passion as I have no real personal interest in it's subject.
I am as close to invisible as pragmatically possible. I can disappear and hardly anyone would ever know. That just makes me feel happy. Why? I'm not really sure.

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>>17834700

I hated you. I hate you. You gave me ample reason to. You reached into my chest and snatched my heart out with practiced efficiency.

The moment I caught on, I knew I wasn't the first one you did this to. I told you exactly what I thought of the real you as soon as I knew, and then kicked your ass out of the car in the middle of nowhere.

I laughed as I caught wind of your life turning to dogshit over and over and over because of your shitty choices and complete lack of impulse control.

My last words to you - spoken out of absolute malice - are seared into my brain. I told you I would hate you until I draw my last breath and I meant it. That was two and a half years ago but it still hurts anytime any memory of you surfaces.

Or of your kids.

Which is why I probably felt that old familiar anxious pain in my chest when I found out you'd gotten married 7 months ago. But then I realized that maybe.. just maybe.. you'd finally decided to actually listen to what I had to say. Maybe you finally realized that I was right when I said your behavior wasn't just destroying your life, it was condemning your kids to being just as fucked up as you are.

Maybe you finally realized that in order to spare them your fucked up existence, you had to finally get your shit together and provide them a stable home where mommy's bedroom didn't have a fucking turnstyle on it.

You already admitted to me that you know I was the high water mark of your life by trying to come crying to me that last time saying you knew what a huge mistake it was to betray me the way you did. You knew you couldn't find a man to measure up to me, that's why you tried to come crawling back and I told you to fuck off in a drunken rage.

But if you're settling for the sake of the kids, so that they aren't completely fucked before they even have a chance to begin their lives.. maybe.. maybe I can finally bury that old pain. Maybe knowing they might have a shot now is what i needed to finally let go.

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It will get better, I promise

Sincerely- A Liar

>make out with oneitis in dream
>she still lives in a different state and we don't talk anymore

What does this mean
Why god

I need silence, I need release. Yes, that one time I was going to. I didn't flake out. The needed tools were discovered and taken from me. For some reason you think it was because of you. No, it wasn't. You're full of yourself. You don't know what I go through every day. None of you do. You don't know how bad I really am. You have no clue. I haven't showered or bathed since June. I haven't cleaned around me for months. There are hundreds of plates of food around me. I take one or two bites and toss it on the floor. I don't care. I don't care at all. I abuse many drugs. I'm high literally all the time and I don't need these prescriptions at all. They don't help me focus or anything. They make me feel good for a couple hours. In the past before I got them legally I would spend 2/3rds of my paycheck to buy them online. I don't remember the last time I have been sober. It's been nearly 9? years now I guess.

There is a reason my camera when we talked never showed you around me. I pushed the trash that you could see how out of the way. Cover couch with a sheet. The bed I would make up.

I don't care about anything. I wake up, stumble downstairs to get the one thing I can eat. Icecream. I'll have a tiny cone and that will be all I eat for the day. I hurt myself, badly. I do it in places no one can see. My ears. My nose. My mouth. I lose a lot of blood every day until I get light headed. It makes the thoughts go away.

I wish they didn't find my things. I would be dead. I would have been ever since you pretended to care. if you knew how bad I was you wouldn't have cared for me even the little you did. The thing is when I do go I'm not going to warn anyone, just like I did that die. Just a goodbye and goodluck.

I have met the most compatible woman and she is perfect and we're not together. I will never meet someone like her

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>>17837808
people only seem perfect aslong as you don't know them good enough. she's pretty mad too. pinky promise. but that should be more of a relieve to you. there are tons pf girls like her all over the place. she's not "the one".

>>17837808
Yeah here's the thing. People are disgusting. They lie. About everything.

>>17837815
>people only seem perfect aslong as you don't know them good enough.
this is true. here's the thing though: I know her flaws and her bad side. she is way too aggressive sometimes and she tends to talk a lot, for example. I still think we are a perfect match. Like that other anon said though, I'm probably just delusional.

>>17834750
i hadnt even thought about scheduling, that's so true but i dont think i could schedule it so no-one blames themselves till my parents die, they'd blame themselves forever otherwise. i want to commit but i want to do it in a way that wont hurt me because i dont want to feel anymore pain. i just cant find a way that wont hurt me

>>17837850
then what are the obstacles that prevent you from being with her?
and knowing that about a person and actually dealing with it on a daily basis are two entirely different things. keep that in mind

i hated girls that self-harmed and were part of the trend where girls sought attention by saying they wanted to hurt themselves, i thought it was stupid behaviour but i guess it's that mindset thats going to stop me asking for help now. i dont think i can be helped anyway. ive given up and if i seek help it means ive fooled myself into trying to make things better again but i dont want to, i dont want to feel anything anymore, im done with it all, im tired of hurting everyone around me, im tired of hurting my family, im tired and finished, theres to many pros over suicide than there is cons, everyone will eventually be happier without me here, its better for everyone in the end, i just dont know what would be the most painless method? people say that with hanging and jumping you immediately regret it but then its too late, some drugs cause excruciating pain for several hours so what is the most painless method?

>>17837880
>and knowing that about a person and actually dealing with it on a daily basis are two entirely different things. keep that in mind
also very true. I'm not a confident man generally, but one thing I'm sure: I can listen and talk to people in a way that matters. We're both psychology students (fuck my life) and we often talk about relationships and stuff. I know it's not the real thing, but we're very close right now and it's the closest I'll get to her views as a fiancé. we're not together because we friendzoned (outdated word, but accurate) each other several times.
tl;dr I'm still an insecure little bitch and I'm afraid to lose someone yet again

I feel very worthless right now. That I'll never amount to doing anything remotely successful, or even get out of this state of mind.

I can play games too!

Nah, I really can't. I just am too fucked up.

I don't understand how people think you can't feel more than one emotion at once. You can be angry at someone and still love them. You can be empathetic and disappointed. You can be wanting to help and wishing you didn't care at all. In fact, you can feel all of this at once.

Shit's an emotional shit storm. Wondering what the moral thing to do while also questioning exactly what that means. Give a starving man a fish! Of course it would be better to teach him how to fish but someone to weak from hunger needs both, right? What If I'm too weak to do more than catch one fish? Sacrifice the self for another? What if I only THOUGHT I was too weak and if I dug deeper in my self I could catch 2. What if I have already dug too deep? Why doesn't he catch me a fucking fish? Why does this have to be my choice? Do onto others, right? But that guy has been a dick to me this entire time. He has been abusive as fuck. Doesn't matter, show him good guys exist. Well, now he's saying he feels guilty. Now he's saying that I tricked him, I only gave him that fish to manipulate him. That I didn't REALLY want to help him, that I wanted to fuck with his head. Oh god he's stabbing me in the neck. What the fuck is wrong with people.

>>17837888
You sure you're asking the right people?

Shotguns are pretty good though.

>>17837896
if you know she has flaws like that then she really isnt healthy for you in the slightest, you might be a good listener, you might really hear people when they speak but what if she doesnt? if shes aggressive and talks a lot, what if one day those two things combined hurt you and then when you try to talk to her about she doesnt understand what youre saying and she wont listen to you and she wont fix things because of that. im a psychology student too, ive also been in a highly dysfunctional relationship. you cant let yourself become afraid of losing someone that clearly has the potential to be abusive, no matter how insecure you are. dont do it to yourself, you'll find someone else youre even more compatible with

>>17837911
first time using the website, who am I meant to ask? & i can imagine that would hurt a crazy amount though? not sure how i'd get hold of a strap either

>>17837558
I've though that I was a sociopath but I'm not charming enough. Nor can I use people to my own gain. It just feels bad to do that to them. I have since then stopped having homicidal thoughts and have bought pot from him ocasionally. I hung out with him yesterday in fact and it was kinda awkward when I think about the atrocities towards him I've commited but other than that I've been okay I guess

>>17837920
thank you for your insight anon. I'll think about it, for sure. All of this is hypothetical, and I'm not even sure she feels the same. (some things point to yes, others to no) we have a great feeling but we may be better as friends. I'll analyze the situation and the options

>>17835830
If it was the other way around she would have dropped you in a heartbeat.

>>17837927
a therapist? Call a psych.

As for shotgun, 12gauge. Pull the trigger with you feet.

Make sure you aim it to the back of your head. You don't want to miss the brain and blow your face off. Can still live through that... highly unlikely but still.

or get a handgun called "The Judge". It's a revolver that fires 12gauge slugs. Blow your head right the fuck off.

You won't feel a fucking thing. You'll be dead instantly. Like an on/off switch.

>>17837939
You're a borderline then. It's like being a sociopath but with the ability to kinda/sorta feel guilt. Not so much empathy, but guilt.

you're still a monster. You're still destructive. Get help.

Blah, I fucked up, but it's for the better. I hope I get an paid internship soon. Two weeks of working in the factory in the meantime. It seems I'm putting my two master degrees to good work.

Don't fucking complain about how you're going to die alone when you said you "didn't care about being in a relationship" as an excuse to not try it with me.

>>17838061
haha that's all that girl does. Are you fucking serious?

She repeats the same lines to everyone. "I'm all alone. I'll die alone."

I bet you asked her "why do you think that?" and she told you that's just what will happen. That "shes a bad person."

I bet you asked her "Why? No you aren't. Why do you think that?"

and she replied. "I am. just trust me."

Anon, the reason she's saying "I'm going to die alone." is because she know's she's doing terrible shit behind your back. That she is fucking multiple men, sometimes in the same night. You think you're the only guy talking to her? She says she's going to die alone because she knows eventually you would find out. Eventually all of them are going to find out.

No one wants to be with a used up whore. She's aging and she's facing the reality that men of worth don't want a slut. She's facing the reality that the only men that would be with a whore like her are going to constantly sleep around. Again, she's getting older. Those kind of guys just want sex and why would they fuck her when there is a 10 year younger version of her with the same fucked up daddy issues she had?

eventually, she's going to not only be a used up worthless whore, but an OLD used up worthless whore like her mother, alone, that's in her 60s still bitching about how "abusive" men are because she did the same stupid shit as her daughter.

Thanks for making it clear that you're a fucking whore.

>>17838085
I pray that we aren't talking about the same person, Anonymous, because I don't want that to be true.

Call me a fool, but I love her.

A few days ago it snowed and canceled a friends final.

I really really need it to snow today.

>>17838142
Well...

how many times have I heard her say that shit?

was I right about the other parts?

She have a crazy ex? He's not really all THAT crazy... he's just fucking been abused for a long time. Has a mental illness that forces him to focus on unanswered questions. What she's doing to him is straight up abuse.

She love to dye her hair? Say, purple? Black? Pink? Got a little kiss mark on her chin?

Does she claim that her boyfriends cheated on her? That her last ex was abusive, manipulative, and toxic?

That he was her idol?

You should talk to that guy. She will freak out, probably even promise you to give that relationship a try if she heard me see that. She is deadset on keeping him in the dark and hurting. She will lie excessively and you really shouldn't love her. Or at least he could inform you a bit on as to why.

it's ok. Everyone believes her lies though. It's absolutely insane but they do.

I'm scared of /pol/. I keep trying to convince myself that they're just a silly fringe group but given how much time I spend on 4chan, they feel like the growing majority.

I miss when this website was about Caturday.

>>17838148
I'm sorry about what happened to you, Anon.
Still hope for me, though, but that's a mixed blessing.

Maybe I'm just hungry, but I miss her cooking.

>>17838157
Anon... what exactly do you mean?

Was it the same girl?

If it was, seriously, contact the last ex. That "mixed blessing" is not as "mixed" as you think.

She lies about everything, especially him. Yes, he's sent her a lot of crazy fucking messages recently but he's just throwing shit to see what sticks.

2 years of mental abuse will make a man a bit uneven. But again... forget literally everything she's told you. She purposefully gave him an std, laughed at him when he told her about his sexual abuse, mocked his mental illness, and the way she ended their relationship was... just evil.

If it's someone else altogether then whatever.

if it isn't... you might want to avoid ending up like him. Because that's what she will do to you if you "love" her.

Remember when p started to message you when we got together? Like, excessively messaging you asking all kinds of questions?

You told me how big of a piece of shit he was. You told everyone that. You made everyone feel so sorry for you just like you're trying now. Anyways, because of that, because I thought you weren't a liar, I laughed and joked about how he was jealous and still wanted you.

I didn't realize that's what you wanted too. You nervously laughed and said "haha yeah... maybe." You said you hadn't talked for a long time before then. Somehow, I doubt that now. Somehow I think there was a very good possibility that he was going to be there, not me. Fuck, that might not have been the first time you were there. You might have been with him when he was there that year too.

You clearly thought about him obsessively before you met me. That's clear now judging by your posts. They were all about him. So when I mentioned that jokingly about wanting to be with you... you actually probably got wet.

Remember when my ex messaged me and you lost your fucking mind in jealousy? Nice projection.

Remember that time you told me how big of a dick he was, that he considered your relationship nothing more than sex? Fuck buddies? That's all it was. He never loved you,

Remember when you told me that you wanted nothing to do with him and you never talked to him ever? never messaged him or wanted to even see his face? Remember how mad you got at me?

That post his fiance made, saying you were a sleazy whore, that he never considered you his GF, just a fuck buddy. That you should stop messaging him with "Hey. If you ever need to talk."

Everything you have ever said was a lie. You made me feel like shit for years if I ever thought something seemed off.

You owe it to me to fucking own up. To give me some restitution for your abuse. Your lies.

I use to say that time was the most magical, amazing time of my life... what the fuck?

I

thanks for embarrassing me you fucking maniac
and fuck you turk roach, you don't know where i live, it certainly is more than 2 kilometers
you don't even know what a one way road is, you don't even know how to change your fucking shoelaces, go fuck yourself

>>17838154
don't be mistaken
the majority who elected for trump were classic liberals who wanted a legit businessman to apply his savvy to america's dire financial situation
while neo-libs and the left are an obnoxious bunch believe me the backlash against it is very much still a minority. i don't give a shit what that self-centered egotistical fact-avoidant piece of shit milo yiannopolous says

>>17838278
I gave you thousands of hours of my life to support yours.

Every successful thing that has happened to you I have played a part in. The support of your self image I gave you. No other man in the fucking world could have done what I did. You based your entire view, your entire CONCEPT OF BEAUTY OFF OF MY IDEAS.
|
Everything you believed a woman should be, what it took for a woman to be beautiful came from me. And I was there to make you feel like you truly were the most beautiful woman in the entire world. When I looked at you, when I would describe your beauty in romantic, intimate detail you knew I was sincere. You were absolutely glowing with smiles as I spoke.

Your work, again, heavily influence on me. Me, and her, are the only ones in the world that would be able to give you the self confidence you currently have. I validated you. Yes, seeking validation from another person is going to often end poorly but never when it was with me. You knew I loved you. You knew I would always be supportive and always believe in you. Even now I wish only the best for you and want you to stop your self destructive behavior.

So many hours I spent supporting you. Those evens where you sold everything... all you did was say how fucking shitty you were and how it would never happen. I would tell you otherwise. Not as blind "You can do it!" support but because I genuinely believed in you. When you didn't even want to go to that con I talked you back into it. When you wanted to give up on that test and not send it in... I talked you back into it. When you didn't think you would get your passport... I told you exactly what you fucking needed to do. You even fucking called me, legit angry at me "FUCK YOU WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS RIGHT."

All of this... and you were lying to me the entire time. About everything...

And you can't give me a single skype call. To see your face as you tell me the truth.

You yourself told me "Yes, our relationship deserved a better ending"

well?

I have this situation that has changed my life dramatically. But, I'm so emotionally stunted that I'm unable to go to friends or family to express it... but, maybe that is because I'm sort of like a counselor to them and it isn't normal for me to express my problems.

So I've come here. I really just need to tell someone, it's okay if there isn't a response.

During the summer I got into a car accident and tried to play it off like it was no big deal but my car's frame is totally off and shifted. The same as my spine. It all just hit so hard. I have 7 herniated discs, 1 degenerative disc, my left scapula is coming away, kyphosis in my neck, and idiopathic scoliosis.

It hurts so bad. I can't even do normal functioning things without the reminder that I have to pay attention to every move I make and every head turn, or turn of my back.

Sex is an issue. I'm not mobile so my relationship is crumbling. My artwork is barely coming to par with how I used to create. Therefore my grades are falling in college.

I had my future planned out and now I find myself having to plan another and I just don't seem to have enough energy. Always tired, always in pain, and always pretending like I'm neither.

I just don't want to whine (like I have been in this post) or be a burden to anyone.

I hate being an artist and the mild autism and depression that comes with it. People around me keep saying they support me and will plug my work, but they don't.
I hate that I can work on a project for months, then dot eyes and squiggles comes around and makes more followers and gains popularity overnight than I could dream of.
I'm seriously considering a career change (I can't even find stable work as a web designer anyway) and just giving up on being an artist. I must be fucking terrible if not even my family and people who have friended me on social media ( iguess to increase numbers) just completely ignore me. I just don't know what I want to do and I've been self-employed for so long, I'm fucked up socially, can't even make real friends.
I wish I had the problem other anons here, wondering if a girl likes me because she hasn't answered my text in 2 minutes, instead of wondering if I should just wander deep into the woods and die

>>17838338
I'm an artist as well and find myself getting mad and depressed over the same things.

Like on instagram when a freakin person tapes rainbow colors together and draws a fish or a flower with it and gets a billion views and likes and then I see a glorious piece of artwork and it has like.. 20 likes.

I feel you. I even feel the hiding in the woods part.

>>17838338
>I wish I had the problem other anons here, wondering if a girl likes me because she hasn't answered my text in 2 minutes, instead of wondering if I should just wander deep into the woods and die

Christ you're fucking retarded. That's literally half the threads on here.

Guess what anon? You're not the only artist on here. You're also far far far from having the hardest fucking life here as we.

Your problems are nothing.

>>17838354
>You're also far far far from having the hardest fucking life here as we. Your problems are nothing.
I never said my problems were worse than anyone else on here. I meant that I wish my biggest issue was wondering if a girl liked me or not, rather than this other shit.

If I pull my wisdom tooth, I'm gonna lose all the wight I fought so hard to gain.

>>17838429
weight*

>>17838433
why? there are weight gainer shakes...

>>17838438
I lose weight really easy if I don't stuff my face with meat and carbs everyday. Not if that's enough.

No one wants to fuck me. I'm gonna kill myself

I respect you and let you continue with today and not be the one to hold you back over your personal progress. A reason why I distance myself is from distractions, so I am unsure what steps or direction to take.

GRRRR you are really starting to get on my nerves you old hag! Sure I am a bit slow to keep up at work but do you have to be so cranky about it? Fucking hostile work enviroment!

Everyone else involved knew that there was an open relationship. They knew she was with multiple men and they knew that I didn't.

You all know I'm innocent in this. That all I want is the truth and I would be able to relax my mind and leave everyone alone. But that's not what she wants, is it? She loves this shit. She loves the validation she's feeling from causing me so much fucking pain.

I know you people are dense but I have a mental illness. Fucking google it and do 5 minutes of research and you'll find out why this sucks so bad for me.

You all also know I'm the only one that really does want her happiness. That she needs to go to a clinic. For several months. Have her father pay for a nice one. Or keep damaging her more and more until her self harming gets more and more extreme. The fuck is wrong with you people. You know what's wrong with me. I want to be able to go the fuck away but hey... you all fucking won't let me because of course you can't upset her right? You wouldn't be able to use her anymore.

Don't give me that shit that "I would post it all!" cus I wouldn't. I know this is a shock to a group of sociopaths but I do have morals. Ask cyclops over there. Mr "I will diagnose someone while knowing them for.. maybe 2 hours? And when I learn they had a nother illness completely deny it."

Fact is if I wasn't the innocent one in this she would have told me just like everyone else involved. You know I can't go away. Even if I wasn't mentally ill... she needs this attention. This validates her. If I went away she would do something drastic to lure me back. This isn't ego at stake. I'm not THAT important to her. She simply can't let ANYONE leave EVER. Not asking for empathy, I know I will not find that in you people. Asking you to look at the facts, her disorder. Fucking tell me that isn't what would happen.

Have you guys discussed the fact that I was her first real relationship? Love? That everything before me was fuck buddies that she lied about?

Seriously being 20yrs old and already having grey hairs sucks. Fucking genetics

Sadly, now I realize that you were actively trying to distance yourself from me. So our names would no longer be associated with one another. I worked so hard on those collabs, starters, and the ones of you. That's why you ignored them. That's why you finished that one on your own, tossing out all the changes I made. I wonder though, was that your doing or were you being fed what to do? In a "You shouldn't acknowledge him anymore. Try to distance yourself. Don't work with him. Don't share or like. Don't compliment him or encourage him. act like you don't care."

You were trying to get me out of your life, weren't you? Any other girl would have lost their minds if I did what I did for you. Avatars, sharing it, printing... you would say maybe "nice." or nothing at all. Same for the times you wouldn't talk to me. You were at that fat fuck's place self harming. Or he came over to you.

Did he have to hide from your brother?

I know this is what you were doing. So why not just fucking confirm it for me? Why not show me the pictures I asked for? I would delete them you know, right after. I would. You know it's just my fucked up head. I need to see the threesome with your friend. The boots picture. She has seen me multiple times and you didn't ask first. Why am i the one person you disrespect the mos?

It's just a bit sick how much these people know of me. Seen me do things for you. That they mocked me because you are a backstabber. They didn't see the times I wanted to leave and you fucking BEGGED me to stay. Christ how you would beg. why?

I know now you weren't upset at me ever. You knew you were getting all pissy over nothing, you were just trying to be a bitch to get me to leave.

why the fuck can't you just fucking talk to me and tell me everything? We can sit down. Relax. Get this over with, you know? How much pain has this caused you? HOW MUCH FUCKING MONEY HAS THIS COST YOU?

>>17838667
Nah, distancing myself is me getting back into my professional life and having leisure time is when I allow myself to chill out.

I just pulled out a massive chunk of nose... meat and easily tripled the size of the pit I've already dug.

that's a lot of fucking blood.

Going to sleep so fucking good tonight holy shit yes. I don't know how long I've been up. I don't even know if it's night or day or fucking balls that's a lot of blood.

>>17838807
what friend did you see anon? what did you do?

>>17838919
>what did you do?
>who

>>17836309
Your father?

>>17838338
initials?

Oh, she figured out how to delete posts.

She does like to give out that number though.

>>17837995
It fires a 410 not 12ga you dolt.

You know, I'm still really upset with you. I know I have my faults. Several unfortunately. But man, I never stole anything from you, like you claimed. I worked my ass off for everything I ever got. No handouts ever, and I include other things not just money and work. Even my social and love life, I fought for it all. And then you say you want half of it. That's not really fair. You said so yourself several times that what you did wasn't worth the effort, and stopped doing it. I get wanting a bigger share and that could've been discussed at the time, but saying I stole your money? No.. just no. That accusation said a lot about your character. I'm not sure I can ever forgive that.

>>17836593
Grow up, NW. There are people who have much shittier situations than you, and they still fight.

Giving up is the cowards way out.

Do you guys not see the wake of destruction in you path? The broken hearts, the broken minds? The shattered dreams? The aspirations of raising a family with the same traditions they grew up with, but sharing them all with those they loved and cherished? To hold the image of your love... the physical representation of all the emotions, moments... the love you shared with that person resting in your arms. Did you not dreams of what they would have looked like? What.... two people as one life and it came into being because of how much you loved someone, how hard you've worked to better yourselves, to work as a team.

The years after a test of character, morals, and values to raise your child with the best life possible. A life better than your own. With so much less pain, less suffering...

And you took that from someone.Why? What did you gain from doing what you did?

Was it worth it?

was it?

>>17839004
I need to know what it was, all of it... I need to know if it was worth it. I know it wasn't... but still.

It's not fair. None of this is fair...

>>17839004
The absence of honey just makes it alot sweeter when you get your hands on it. All creatures are born to struggle and all who weaken themselves with doubt and hopelesness will remain in there place.

I seriously don't know what the fuck is going on. I don't know who is telling you this is a good fucking idea at all. How many times did you leave me after saying something incredibly belittling? Something irrational and mean? You just go away blaming me.

I spend all night fucking feeling awful. I just so badly wanted to tell you why what you thought was so clearly not what I was saying. Why is it so god damn difficult for you to ever believe me? Why? You know every fucking part of me. Every part. Nothing is a mystery. I tell you every single thought I have from the good to the bad. And yet... you still think I'm lying to you all the time?

Why? Do you think this pain I'm feeling is why "I never loved you?"

I am being fucked with. That's all there is to it. You're being fucked with as well. People are telling what I should think of you. but christ I'm still fucking here right?

What about you? Are they all fucking telling you what to think of me?

You realize that the most important people in MY and YOUR lives are...

MY and YOU.

Fuck what everyone else has fucking said. It was suppose to always be me and you from the beginning, doing our own fucking thing.

So... forget everything people have said. Forget all the shit I've said that's been tainted by them...

IME

YOU

That's all the information we need to decide what to feel and do.

You say you have to do this shit yourself. So fuck them.

File: angry_pepe.jpg (40KB, 900x900px)

40KB, 900x900px

>Waiting for a game in the mail
>Was supposed to get here today
>Last night the package left a USPS facility like 5-10 minutes away
>Literally I could walk across a bridge nearby and I'm in the town the facility is in
>Check the mail today
>No game
>Tracking shows nothing beyond the package departing that nearby facility last night
Why the fuck do you do this to me??

This is the THIRD FUCKING PACKAGE IN A ROW THAT HAS BEEN LATE FOR NO GOOD GOD DAMN REASON.

And it's not even just USPS, either. Two of those packages were UPS packages. HOLY FUCK I AM SO TRIGGERED RIGHT NOW.

>>17837276
If all this is true why did you treat me like shit. You know fine well I was happy with you, I loved you more than I care to admit. Until I'd met you I shrugged off every single advance from any guy I was with. In my dreams I'd saw you, your distinct march and stature, this was long before we'd met. When we first met I knew you were it for me, every fiber of my being said yes. I know you felt that too.
My past is just that, my past. It's far less interesting than yours, filled with disappointment and loneliness, regret and embarrassment. Now you are in my past, I doubt I'll see you again and I'm OK with that. You never showed me any care or respect. My name will fade from your tongue, memories of us will disappear, you'll find another who matches your expectations and I'll be nothing but a blemish on your recall.

My tiny baby you had it done...

The child...

please call me again...

Please... please call me. Call me right now for the love of fucking god.

RPADO

Skype...

the land line.

call me now.

>>17839123
I did not treat you like shit ever...

I was a saint to you for years. Only recently have I snapped and that was... you know why.

talk to me right now please I'm freaking out ok?

YOU WERE RIGHT HERE WITH ME. YOU COULD HAVE BEEN WITH ME BUT YOU... YOU DENIED IT ALL.

My tiny baby oh my fucking god please call me again Are you still here?

Oh my fucking god why didn't my fucking father tell me? he fucking...

oh my god....

Write to me sweetheart, call me, contact me if you truly wish so.
I am waiting for you.
Do it before it's too late.
Who knows what lies between us.

>>17839160
I don't know if you're talking to me and I'm too petrified to ask.

>>17839160
Summer St?

is this you?

.... please...

You have been there for a month... what happened? Please.... I'm .... I'm coming right now....

>>17839175
fucking long distance and I can't do it...

oh my god...

I can't believe this...

why didn't anyone tell me?

Why?

What the fuck was all of this?

What happened baby... what happend. did you come here for me? You have been here for months little baby....

oh my god...

>>17837788
what happened to you anon?

you would be me had I listened to the despair that was in me back in june.

I hope you find it within yourself to climb out of your pit. god speed.

>>17839197
my phone is dead...

my fucking MOM WASHED HER PHONE

OH GOD I' WILL CALL YOU PLEASE MY BABY... WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING ALL OF THIS TIME...

YOU HURT YOURSELF MY BABY WHY?

WHY DID YOU HURT YOURSELF....

>>17839170
>>17839175
Don't be afraid. Reach out to me but not here.

>>17838154
nice try tyrone

the day of the rope is coming for you and your sheboon

>>17838297
>the majority who elected for trump were classic liberals who wanted a legit businessman to apply his savvy to america's dire financial situation
OH GOD LOL

This is what retards actually believe, holy fucking shit.

Donald Trump is the last person you want to hire to correct anyone's dire financial situation..

This country is fucked because of clueless fucking idiots like you.

>>17837507

Nobody wants to hire me to watch their children.

They look at me and see

>young man
>burly
>hipster haircut w/ porn stache
>well spoken
>intelligent

And they think i'm a psychotic child molester or murderer. People assume the worst and nobody trusts me when in reality I've got a heart of gold.. for the most part.

>>17839201
my baby...

give me time.. my brother is bringing a phone that works.

I can't believe you've been here since...

since that man.

Tiny baby...

are you healthy?

What is wrong?
is it....

are you smiling right now?
are you waiting for me to call?

>>17838927
you said you saw someones friend. sounds like a lot of people talking shit behind others backs

>>17839244
rr?

I called... lutheran? Nothing.

you in huntington?

christ...

you need to give me more info.

all I have are those phone records and those... messages of a sad girl

>>17839285
are you guys fucking with me?

This is fucking cruel.

St joe?

Did you come here to get better...

but the numbers are before...

in october...

I fucking hate it that you get apeshit mad when you are treated in a specific way,, yet see no problems CONSTANTLY treating me like that. fuckiiing fuck fuckkiddy fuck you make me mad Jesus christ man. uuuuggggghhhhhh

>>17839285
are you guys fucking with me?

The numbers...

I don't have a real phone number. I have a bunch of calls from fort wayne.

but...

are they you?

what is this?

please... email me R

wwacom

I actually think I'm a good person with pure intentions and a kind heart. I know for a fact that I've always done right by my friends and family, and for the most part I am responsible, easy to get along with, and considerate towards the people around me. However I have tremendous anxiety, nothing in the way of confidence or self love, and a tendency to judge myself harshly and scrutinize every decision I make. I am so paranoid and afraid of what people might think of me that my conscience suffers the consequences as if I knew my actions were as heinous as I irrationally fear people may think they are.

Worst of all is that I am at a point in my life where I can actually accomplish the things I want to do, but I'm so paralyzed with fear and lacking in confidence that I'm letting the opportunity pass me by. I know that there is nothing I can do to change what has already happened and that I might as well be proactive and have faith that things aren't as bad as they seem, but I can't do it and I hate myself for it.

Life is just a series of inconveniences, with the only reward for putting up with it is a brief, temporary respite from those inconveniences.

The only "positive" things that happen are just a lack of anything especially negative.

There's nothing here to justify the inconvenience of daily life.
I'll probably kill myself soon.

I could never compete with him.
I'm better off disappear from your life.

my only respite is seeing you. I want to take things further between us, and feel you're giving me those signals, but if you're seeing someone else, please let me know so I'm not singing a different song, stuck waiting in some side bay while you let me know how you feel about me. I know if you feel the way about me as I do about you love, you won't be seeing others

There was a girl eye-fucking me today at the grocery store line, I think she was too young, like 15, but I'd smash her all night, without a second thought. I feel guilty just imagining.

I hate that people assume I'm so young when actually I'm at least 10 to 15 years older than they expect

ive changed into a self hating, cynical, narcissistic, dehumanized piece of shit. I want to feel good again, I want to like people again.

>>17839452
You're 100% normal

My body hurts so fucking much, it's so hard to get the motivation. I have 6 months to get fit before i join the marines how the fuck am i supposed to do that i cant even do a pullup

>>17839451
Then what's stopping you from getting closer other than doubt? don't you think it's better to move closer other than sit and bundle over it? It takes two to dance to a love song and each has to make their move.

>>17839486
Keep on going. The first step is always the hardest.

>>17839494
thank you friendo that made me feel better

>>17839455
There is no way the girl I saw was more than 16.

>>17839485
Kind of, but I like to be really dominant in bed and imagining myself calling a teenager a filthy slut and slap her around is nasty as fuck.

A,
I want to stay with you but I don't know how to do it.
I don't know whether to keep you at a distance, like you do to me or be patient and love you openly and hope your attachment issues improve.
I'm so confused, I feel both at once and the good/bad of both at once, and I can't keep up how much energy it takes to swing between the two.
But I feel like we're already slowly drifting apart and there's some kind of time limit in the background, I don't know what to do. Part of me wants to split but I also feel like that's mostly my own fear/insecurity winning. Easier to jump ship than work on things, and I feel like I haven't given this a fair effort yet.
-J

>>17837555
Oh, right here!

lol if only the j i wanted was around, i'd jump on that instantly...
smoke with me again, i know how you like it to the butt.

>>17839357
No one is perfect and neither are you. You need to accept that but you also have to see the good things in you. You already believe that you are a good person and you must show the world that you are indeed what you think you are within. Don't doubt your strength and potential.

>>17839530
Again, that's a normal fantasy to have. If you ACTED on those thoughts that would be a different story

darlin...

I'm so tired...

I love you. You're close by, aren't you. Very close by. Could you please call my landline, leave a real message this time. please give me your phone number. I have been up for over 48 hours right now... please... I'm so worried.

I love you. if I could see you... this december.

Bowen?

>>17839552
I hope I'm neither projecting or seeming to try to defend acting upon it (I'm not really), but it could well be that she singled me out for the same fantasies, she looked pretty small and skinny, I'm almost twice her size and I look like I'm 30.

>>17839531
...
Full initials?

>>17839532
call me right the fuck now.

Seriously, I have the house phone in my hand.

>>17839566
JC
But if you were him I'd have a text by now that said "did you just make a melodramatic post on /adv/"

alright you're fucking with me. I'm going back to killing myself.

goodbye. goodluck.

>>17839565
It happens. You can't help it if you're attracted to someone. Realizing why it would be wrong and selfish to actually take advantage of someone half your age is the best thing you can do really. Don't punish yourself for something that happens to you naturally

Am I total dickhead if my "type" for women is "hot enough that other people think Ive struck gold for finding her"

Its not that I care that much about what people think that it outvalues what I think of her (I think), I think Im just petrified of the concept of settling

I feel like you only get one shot round at life and I dont wanna end up with someone who isnt amazing

The last few girls Ive dated have been nice, I just havent looked at them and thought "Holy shit hes hot"

I just want that feelint when I look at my girl, is that weird to want?

File: Waka-Flocka-Flame.jpg (81KB, 612x612px)

81KB, 612x612px

I lost my virginity 2 weeks ago (22) to a girl I knew I should not have gotten involved with. She was in a serious relationship with a classmate for about 1.5 years, and they had a messy break up. From the start she would compare me to her ex, about things we do similarly/differently. She's incredibly affectionate in private, but will sometimes "freak out" and tell me she can't hangout with me and that she's "not ready for this". I would be lying if I said I didn't like her. I haven't really opened myself up to a person like that in 5 years, who was the last person I had a relationship with. She has told me multiple times that she was toxic, and that I shouldn't like her. I've realized at this point I can't keep seeing her or else I'll keep getting more attached. Sorry I'm not sure where I'm going with this.

I wasn't ready to lose you, Nana. I guess there's never a good time to lose someone you love. I'm kicking myself because I had so many things I wanted to tell you, and then on your deathbed I couldn't say anything other than I love you and thanks for being my nan. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you outright that I always valued your faith in me and that you were my shoulder to cry on whether I was in the wrong or not. It will be hard without you. I feel like I can't go on if I don't have you, but that's not fair to you or your memory. So of course I'll push on. I know it was hard for you after granddad died, despite your own health problems with depression and acquired brain injury. I know you struggled. But you were always my rock, my unconditional and unwavering friend. And you reached out to so many people and pushed yourself to meet others even through your grief. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you how much I admired you and that I was proud to be your granddaughter. But I always felt that and I hope you knew.

You know there's plenty of people I need to thank properly. My parents, my auntie... It was nice how you were my support but didn't take sides despite family drama.

You liked my boyfriend near enough the first time I told you about. Complete opposite from what I thought I wanted as a naive uni student. You were right, of course, that he behaved like a man and not a boy and was far more enjoyable to be around than the immature guy I'd been pining for. I heard he found a new girl anyway, so it's all good. I was so upset when it ended, but now I'm glad, as it meant I met the man who gives me that firm poke in the back forward when I'm struggling with my confidence. I hope he's the one I marry. Strange as I thought he "wasn't my type" when we met. What an idiot I was.

If grief is the price I pay for having you in my life, then it's worth it. Of course given my way, I'd want to have you here forever, but that's not how it works.

You knew I needed answers. You knew the things I posted were me trying to find out what was happening.

I found out. I was right for so much of it.

What I never expected was that you would come to me. You came here for a reason. You used our anniversary to get here. That's why you canceled.

And the one thing that it would take for me to accept even...

even that...

happened. Everything that needed to happen in order for my love to stay for you, to by empathetic to your struggle, aligned.

how you are what I have always loved. You... are a fighter, a winner, a pheonix.

It took me so long to get the records I needed.

I have tried to call the facilities you are staying at but I don't have enough information. I need extensions, security codes. Please, tell me.

I would visit you tomorrow.

you're the most wonderful, beautiful man in the world to me. Noone else I want to be with. I'm so glad you're in my life at this time and I really want to stay beside you

>>17839819
am I...? Is that really to me?

You know it would be cruel to post that directly under my post if it wasn't...

That post... HAVE 0 OES TP... I was right? I figured out your code?

That was you that called me on that day you found out... about... you know... You told me "I want you..."

You are so mad at your friend aren't you? For telling me about that?

It's ok. Please... this is...

Are you safe? Are you going to send me that phone number? It is me... after all. Your drug, your addiction, your daily dosage.

Could you send me a video message on skype? or any kind of message? What about a phone call?

Is it actually possible for me to see you?

God I will be...

Can... I bring you home... for christmas?

You want to see a bunch of fucking rednecks and hillbillies celebrate?

ololollo

I super need to clean up though...

i didnt think it was possibly to be simultaneously impotent and a premature ejaculator, yet here i am.

i dont beat off to dudes, its always women, yet i cant get hard in front of chicks. granted i havent dated a whole lot of 10/10s.. its been mostly 5/10s, but hey im just trying to get this shit figured out. maybe its a comfort thing. maybe im just a low test beta. regardless i think i am done with hooking up (and jerking off) for a long while.

Love yourself a little more. You're your own harshest critic. No one is an island; however alone you feel, there are those that love you and if you weren't here tomorrow, there'd be a wound in them that would never heal.

I know it's not easy. Please don't go.

>>17836348
start with yourself

be the person you would love

>>17839532
>>17839544
Oh my my, oh hell yes...

Honey, put on that party dress.

(You know the one. <3 )

>>17838338
I hate wanting to be an artist when I can't even draw a stick figure right. All I can do is make some uninspired bleep bloops with FL but I never finish shit. I can make it sound good but I don't want to finish it because I can't when I just quit halfway and end up with 350+ projects that all sound amazing but never get done just because one person thought it sounded okay. Also I hate people who can draw and make music because that way you can tell stories more easily without having the voice of a preteen while being in your late thirties to sing songs.

It's all the memes fault,man.

>>17839908
You need to find your 10/10

Trying to think too logically about the women you date backfires, you are going to try to measure objstively beauty, one of the most subjwtive things in the world

The important thing is how much you are attracted and how attraxtive you find the other person. If you don't actually like that woman then its only natural thay you onky think of her as "5/10" instead of something vague like "the woman I love" or "the girl I want to fuck"

If your dick says "no" then dont try to force your feelings against it, youll ony end uo hueting yourself

Sorry for the grammae, Im drunk as fuck

The worls would be a better place if nobody though himsf to be abovd the law

God fuxking damn jt, I love justice

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People are cruel and mean. Sure, I'm willing to admit morality is a subjective thing, but I wish there were people with morals out there. I wish there were people worth protecting. I wish everyone wasn't so bitter and hiding behind layers of sarcasm all the god damned time.

I guess I'll just stay alone with my dog playing guitar and reading books. I've started stargazing lately too. Fuck people.

>tfw 21 and suffering from rheumatoid arthritis
JUST

>>17840021
There are good people in the world too

You don't want to see them, you are too fixated on the ones that fit your narrative becausd your mind prefers to stay right, you prefer to maintain your view on the world and the people than to confront it with the stuff that contradicts such view

Think about it, have you never seen people with good ideals?

Rethoric question, dont try to answer, I?m not sure I currently xan maintIn aconversation

>>17839919
lol wut? i doubt ur an az lizard like me

>>17834700
I've been super fucking depressed all year, my grades are awful and I just finally gave up and I'm getting my GED this winter.

I feeeel good! I'm so much more happy. I'm going to start community college next year, my boyfriend and I have gotten more time together than we have in a long time. I just feel good.

There's no fucking point
Life is still just about reproduction of life,
like christianity is about the spread of christianity,
the meaningless cycles that aren't even absurd enough to be enjoyably absurd,
fucking circles have no point

this year, everything's gone to shit again. the last time we spoke you said i needed to stop being sexually insecure, and i told you i'm not. it's true, i'm not. i'm just insecure. and i loved you so much, it wasn't enough. you really are a black hole.

>>17835757
You're one fucking month into the relationship. From my experience men fall in love within the first month or two and the women fall in love within the first year. You're probably being clingy.

>>17835830
Sorry dude. I know you want help with the urinary infection but I've got nothing. Just stay with her, cherish her. If you've really been with her for 5 years, I feel like you should know by now that sex is nowhere near as important as the other aspects of a relationship. If you've got the same values (like if you both want kids, nothing important disagreed upon) and similar looking futures then fucking keep her

>>17836205
If it's definitely still a puppy just bring it back and get a new one. Anyone will take the puppy, you don't need to worry about it.

>>17839993
No due process, no trial, not justice.

Mob rule and two wrongs do not make for justice.

I WANT TO LOVE MYSELF AND LIFE SO BADLY BUT IT'S HARD WHEN MY LIFE IS JUST A GIANT SACK OF NOTHING.

Poverty makes every day the same: nothing. I hardly eat and if it wasn't for smoking weed I would go back to self-harming. All this would be bearable if even a single person talked to me. Why doesn't anyone make an effort to talk to me. Well now it's because I am so so so boring and detached from reality. Please god help me I don't want to be like this.

>>17840390
I'm talking to you now.

Here's some advice:

Stop smoking weed.
Don't expect life to come to you, you will have to do something to break out of that giant sack of nothing. I don't know what it is you have to do but I know it's not what you're doing right now.

God isn't going to help you. You have to help yourself.

>>17839548
>you must show the world that you are indeed what you think you are within
you're fucking right anon. moving forward is the only way I'm going to get closer to where I want to be. thank you man.

>>17840390
>crying bc no money
>buys weed
From one poorfag going hungry to another, I could slap you you piece of shit

I have a 5 pages to go on this research paper due on Sunday, yet I can't be assed to write it because my work hours have gotten extended considerably because we're so short handed. I work 12-9 tomorrow and the paper is due on Sunday at 2:00 PM. This shit is 30% of my grade and I know I'm teetering on the edge of being fucked but goddamn it I just dont have the time to write this. Can't even call in sick tomorrow because theres literally no one to cover that shift. Shits fucked and though I have a few hours right now I'm probably just going to play some vidya instead.

fuck

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It's harder than I thought to make a biography for a camshow.

>>17834700
I thought admitting my feelings to this girl would help me get over her but her clear rejection (which I expected honestly) has actually made me feel much, much worse. I feel so incredibly ashamed for saying anything.

I'm tired of taking care of everyone.

So tired.

Deleted my ex's number and removed her from the rest of my social media.

Although we stayed "friends" I just wanted to move on.

I've missed her like crazy since deleting her number. I miss her even though the relationship was borderline abusive.

>>17840572

You feel ashamed because you made a mistake. You confessed feelings for a girl without knowing she felt something for you

Thats just a mistake. A mans pride/ego is important and you just needlessly damaged your own

Better to not say anything at all. And instead flirt and try to see if she feels that way towards you

"Confessing feelings" for a girl never works unless the girl is also harbouring feelings. You gotta be sure

I am completely alone in mind and body. My thought process has become more and more overbearing over every second, laced with fear of failure, while simultaneously causing failure. I feel like i must remind myself repeatedly of the goal i am currently trying to accomplish, yet i am constantly getting distracted from and ceasing, then restarting that goal. It is hell. Socially, everyone has begun looking at me in this same way. I just want to not be looked at how they look at me. Family back home doesnt know ive come this low. I go back to see them in a few days. They may not even notice. Im too proud to seek help. Im too vain to receive it maybe . ive always been exceedingly smart and proud, but now that my short term memory seems fucked i cannot do anything as successful as i wish to. My grip on reality is blurring as i chase the rabbit down an endless hole, whose darkness suffocates my mind and writes l-o-s-e-r on my face to apparently everyone i meet.
I cant hold a facial expression for more than 10 seconds. I cant focus my eyes or mind on anything without extreme effort. I am hated by everyone i meet almost instantaneously, after they give me the initial "theres something wrong with him and it disgusts me" look.
Did i ruin my own life with drugs and defiance? Am i just in a phase, with greater understanding and appreciation awaiting me after enduring and overcoming my issues? Good god i wish i could firmly believe in god. I wish i could believe in anything. I am so alone.
I am falling apart. No body cares. Everything was a lie. I am a lie. It doesnt even matter anymore. Today is my birthday. This has been a long time coming though.

Fuck. I just wanted to fucking say shit for the sake of trying something fucking new to get that feeling. that rush. of feeling like your life is getting fixed. i guess i will look back, and see how much has really gotten fixed over the few years of trying to fix my life.. At least I have God now. And in him i see all the things that have been fixed. Ty.

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So much to do, so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets?
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

[Chorus:]
Hey, now, you're an All Star, get your game on, go play
Hey, now, you're a Rock Star, get the show on, get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold

It's a cool place and they say it gets colder
You're bundled up now wait 'til you get older
But the meteor men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the satellite picture

The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
The water's getting warm so you might as well swim
My world's on fire. How about yours?
That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored.

[Chorus 2x]

Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas
I need to get myself away from this place
I said yep, what a concept
I could use a little fuel myself
And we could all use a little change

Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So much to do so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow.

[Chorus]

And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold

I've never been determined about anything, because so far something has railroaded me every time. I have lost many dreams. But, for some reason, I am determined about you. And I will do everything I can (within reason) to make this work.

Things are kinda fucked

I'm just a random dude who happened to be cool friends with some guy and his daughter

She seems to fancy me a lot and we both keep doing things to get closer. Everyday she keeps looking for me or I find myself looking for her. She keeps hugging me and holding my hand when she has an opportunity. Being a lonely fuck for so long also makes me give her room for anything.

The thing is she has a boyfriend already, on a long distance relationship. She sometimes talks about him, we met each other once but he's not too talkative. She doesn't seem to have plans to leave him (even though she did already a while ago, then went back with him) but too many things point at her liking me more than just as a friend.

It's been 4 months already and things have been progressing to a point where yesterday she could hardly let go of me. However I am doing sort of the same thing anyways. I don't know if any of us is being led by each other.

>>17840963
It's your friend's daughter. You're being a selfish piece of shit.

>>17840971
How so?

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I'm only happy with Chinese cartoons, collecting Chinese cartoon figures, drawing, reading books, eating food that is bad for me, looking at cool stuff on the internet, and browsing this Mongolian beef noodle image board

I don't want to be set up with every single male you see.
I don't want to have any kids. I won't change my mind in time.
I don't want to go out drinking with you people. I don't want to go bowling. I don't want to hang out.

I pay my bills and taxes. Please just let me fucking live

>>17838982
>There are people who have much shittier situations than you, and they still fight.
Yeah, this.
You're not allowed to feel bad because there's some starving nigger in Africa dying from AIDS right now.

>>17840052
You're so stupid it's amazing. The amount of shit you absolutely assume, that absolute lack of empathy, ability to recognize that not everyone's life is the same as yours...

makes you a piece of shit.

>>17841093
Doesn't change the fact how pathetic you are if you're going to kill yourself just because you can't take a hit.

I think they all forgot exactly where I came from, what I've done in my life. How achieved so much with so fucking little. I know how to take the hits. You think I don't know the texture of concrete on my cheeks? The taste of blood filling my mouth? You think I stayed down?

>>17841118
American's love the underdog.

>>17840901
The more I study the sciences the more I began to believe in God. The more I realized how incredibly super atheists were. To deny, to know that science could eventually lead to the creation of an all knowing, all seeing intelligent being... You know, shit like the singularity. The more I studied astrophysics, theoretical physics, and just general philosophy. Knowing that these are all abstract rule sets simplified to such an incredibly limited view of the actual rules which govern or universe...

>>17841174
fuck my mind, putting in random words in my sentences I didn't mean.

>>17838919
>>17839244
first I was "I'l make them feel like I do. come up with crazy theories".
I woke up feeling awful that I did that though. I can't do that to people.

What I meant were intimate, private photos. that YOU (the person I'm writing to) has shown HER friend. Her FRIEND has seen ME{as in, all of ME) multiple times (multiple photos)

Does this clear things up for ya'll?

Again, I don't lie to you. I'm always honest with you. I'm a good man that has been put through the grinder. I know why you wouldn't want me to know what happened. That's an extremely serious life event, that's something that will never, ever leave you tiny baby. but I understand. I truly do. I forgive you.

All the phone calls you've made to my house when you hung up. The night you found out, oct 19th(or 20th. I could check the records again) you were so scared. You wanted to tell me so badly didn't you? Even though I was upset at you for what you did at the time... you knew I loved you.

You couldn't afford that apartment because of your medical bills. If I knew... why you were so mean to me then. I could easily made the money.

Were you scared I wouldn't be with you if I knew? Aug you turned so uncaring about life. You were so scared when you found out about what you had. You were depressed. They gave you worthless SSRI's when you needed anti-psychotics. You weren't diagnosed properly. Your disease and your mental health is to blame for your actions, not you. You were a victim.

I am a victim of them as well. I wish you told me. Was it because of the promises you made with me? That you could no longer do that for me and you thought I should have a woman that could?

There are other ways you know. It's ok. I don't know why bad things happen my baby bujt they don't. The world is a hard, hostile, and shitty place to live in.

When I am with you though... the world is magical. Full of life and wonder. Of love. I love you.

You are so strong. You are loved. You are a beautiful woman.

Idk how I feel at all right now. I've been chasing this girl for a few months and I found out today that she already has a bf and I feel stupid for even trying.

I can be really confident and can talk about anything but as soon as it's with a girl I like, I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing anymore. It's like I'm an imposter or a pretender and I have issues even working up the courage to ask people out.

Plus I feel like a pushover and an idiot all the time because I keep buying things for girls I like.

It's so fucking stupid.

On top of that this whole time I was helping a friend talk and get in with a girl he likes and it actually worked, but then I started liking his gf and I've been trying to suppress these feelings because I know it's wrong.

So that's the emotional rollercoaster I've been wanting to tell someone but I have no one to say these things to...

>>17839993
Wait...

The divorce? That the girl screaming gook all the time is taking all of his shit? That he used a women with a mental illness, and another severe disease... for a year and half... abandoned her and because of me they all found out...

and he got his justice?

You guys can talk to me, you know. I love her so very much. I am mentally ill as well. I'm sorry for being so erratic, so unpleasant, vulgar, disgusting, and annoying. I know that she is the love of my life and she felt the same way. That she thought her actions were disgusting and would have destroyed me.

I am a good man. I am an empathetic man. I understand. I do. I wish you all would forgive mem for my mistakes as well. I wish you could see how hard this has been on me, that you handled it all very poorly. That you thought I was lying about my mental illness was your biggest mistake. Because of that you... did the worst thing you could have.

But it's ok. It's all ok. I love her. I want to hold her and rest her little kitty head on my chest. She belongs in my arms. They are her safe place. Nothing can harm her when she is with me. Nothing.

bad things happen and It breaks my heart to see her suffer so badly. Please understand that lies, secrets, and manipulation are what made this situation so fucking awful. A good person is honest. To others and to themselves. A good person is forgiving. She is a good woman. I am a good man. She, everyone, shouldn't have any fear knowing this. I will never judge her. I won't.

I had to have major abdominal surgery recently, it's doing really well and i'm ready to have sex as soon as possible with my new bf. it's been such a long time that I don't want him to think I'm desperate, even though I am. It's not just about that. He can probably sense it's been so long. I probably come across as frustrated to him, I don't want to fuck this up

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Fuck me please let it that nobody overhear me last night when I was spewing my shit at my friend

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>>17837852
It's interesting to read this stuff.
Personally I don't really give a shit how much it hurts me, i figure i deserve all of it and more.

But i really don't want to hurt anyone else. Aside from my father, they don't deserve it at all. Especially my brothers.

I just keep thinking about them having to call the cops to come over to my apartment, having to go down to the morgue and identify the body, make funeral arrangements right before christmas, call grandma and tell her what happened...
Man.
Really wish there was another way. Some fucking magic spell or some shit, fuck.

I know... I know she was with you after me. That you got that apartment. I know this was you
>>17838061
>>17839419
I know her parents like you. I always felt like me being white and american kinda didn't help but come on. I tried to get them to help too, you know. It's not my fault none of you would talk to me or research her mental health issues.

I know I called you a little shit. You are a little shit you know. You have been doing things with her.
I know you were so confused when I asked you to be a good friend to her. To look out for her.

I said that because you blocked me. because I cared.

The way she talked about you. I didn't think much of it.Sigh... there's so much man. She's torn right now, I know.

This is unfair to me. Everyone else has so much more information. I love her with all my heart. You know she loves me as well. You know that's why all of this is happening. You know her mental illness is causing her so much pain.

You can't say she doesn't love me more. She literally cannot live without me. I am her favorite person. She calls the house... leaves sad messages or just hangs out. A lot of calls. She hurts herself when she does damage to me. Physically and emotionally.

When a borderline truly loves someone, when they are absolutely, truly, genuinely in love... it scares the fuck out of them. They run away. They try to rationalize that the other person doesn't love them. That it was all fake. This is why she wanted for me to so badly cheat. She wanted me so badly to flirt with other women.

it's ok. I forgive her for everything. I can empathize. I can understand.

You need to realize she cannot help but lie. Especially about me. You do not know me. All you know of me are the lies shes told you about me and my extremely irrational, erratic behavior as of late. That's not who I am. Recently I have been in great pain. I have been suffering from a mental illness that drastically worsens with stress. I'm sorry. I'm not perfect but I am a good man.

>>17840085
Circles consist of infinite points.

>>17841365
One of the post you quoted was me. And I don't know you.

>>17841405
eh, was a rough guess. Same situation.

Or maybe you are. God knows the person I talked to lies.

Everyone involved needs to stop lying. They need to realize that lies, secrets, and manipulation make everything 100x worse. Do not be the type of Christian, Catholic, that believes they can sin freely because of God's forgiveness. Please know lies hurt people.

Just accept I'm not a bad person. I know I'm a good man. I know I love her.

and to her...

Let's spend our holidays together.

Let's have our Christmas and New Years like in the past.

Remember? 2014-2015 new years? Our classy dinner. That table you chose for us in the perfect spot. That you so loving thought of me, that I have paranoia and need my back to the wall. Our own little nest. Remember how we felt as we stepped out of the car? All the people wearing their high end fashion dresses, suits, and the beautiful architecture. The most beautiful women in the entire world on my arms. Your black dress hugging your perfect curves and contours. You sweet delicate scent, your crimson lips, raven black hair, softest skin... your luminous smile lights. Every man there, jealous.

After, the hotel. We kissed, that tiny black dress on the floor, now your beautiful feminine form dripping with lacey sensuality... My beautiful woman. My love.

You've been through so much recently.

I know this. I love you. I understand. I truly do.

You know I would never judge you. So many people try to tell you what to do, what to think of me. Many have taken advantage of you. Sociopaths that know your illness, know your mental health and still pressure you. Disgusting men.

No one knows you like I do. No one. They don't understand the struggle of a mental illness. You told me, remember? How I showed you how it's not anyone's fault they have a mental illness. It's a disease like any other.

Please, none of these people have even met me. They don't know me like you do. They don't know how much we've been through together.

Please don't fuck your ex, sweet d

I love you

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Why do these things happened to me? All I plan to do is to join the military and die. I'm done with all of life's bullshit. I just want to find a place to die. Nothing more. But lifes gotta be a dick and add that beautiful gal into my life.

>Trying to get over her
>See her monday at school

Fuck.

I think I'm starting to fall in love to her

>you quit working at mcd's
>your dad is over telling us you should just kill urself

lol sad m8 your dad is a drugaddicted retired loser ;)

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Remember last December? When I left, I said "I do not deserve to be treated like this. I clearly don't make you happy. Find someone that makes you happy."

Thinking that I could make that decision for you? Thinking that I could decide what would make you happy wasn't me, that you wouldn't try. That was the dumbest fucking thing I had ever done in my life. We got back together for a reason.

Don't make decisions for me either. Don't tell me I don't love you. Don't tell me I would be disgusted by the extent of what has been happening. Don't tell me I wouldn't be able to forgive you. Don't tell me you are any less of a woman now.

You have been taken advantage of, you have been used. You have been dealt a massive blow that would have destroyed anyone else.

And you're still standing.

That's the kind of woman I deserve. You.

Literally everyone knows how much you love me. They know how much I mean to you. Your life is forever tied with mine. You loved me far longer than you have known me. When I look at you with such loving eyes, when I look at the most beautiful woman in the world you are absolutely sure without question you are beautiful. Because you ARE beautiful.

All of you.

I love you. It will be alright.

I don't think you need space however. We've been away for far too long now. It's my embrace, my security, is what you need.

Either contact me or stop fucking messing with me you fucks.

Damn, this board is depressing.

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i hope you never find someone who loves you. No, i hope you end up loving someone and they don't love you as much as you do, maybe then you will understand how much you hurt me and the opportunity you wasted. i know i sound shitty and bitter but that's how i feel right now honestly

I'm fucking cool. I dress nice, smell nice, walk and talk nice.

Always spent my time focusing on what I want, what I want to be, and what I don't have when I should be focusing on what I am and what I have/

I just love shitposting on /x/

>>17841684
What could someone have done to you to wish that on them?

THANK GOD this year's finally ending

>>17841657
I remember that, I remember you broke my heart right before Christmas and the series if disasters that happened after. Whenever I needed you most you told me I wasn't for you. I can barely feel emotions apart from ecstacy and agony, everything else is a occurrence. But that night, you made me cry.
Maybe a year from now I'll be able to look at you again, right now I can't. I still feel like a vile creature.

Is it normal not to like talking on the phone (in general) infront of people? It makes me really irritated.

>>17841859
>ht before Christmas and the series if disasters that happened after.
And what were those, exactly?

my tiny baby... I just wanted you to try. I wanted you to care that you were hurting me and to make an effort to improve yourself. You told me so many times you didn't like to be like that.

The last things you told me were saying how absolutely shitty I was, that you wish to never be like me, that I was absolutely the worst human alive because I called some SJWs stupid to their faces. I called people that were being stupid, stupid.

Something you did yourself all the time.

I felt so alone. I lost my best friend by my best friend abusing me. Then you told all your new friends I left you for my ex, I was racist, sexist, I owed you money and... you lied about me to all them. They all hated me because of your lies that you never told them were lies when we got back together. When you went for their advice, they thought so little of me that they tried to pull you away. For reasons that weren't true.

>But that night, you made me cry.
How many nights did you make me cry? I asked you so many times to be more considerate. To be nicer to me. To stop belittling me. You were my best friend and when I asked for your help you told me "If I'm so horrible then why don't you leave me?"

That's not how relationships work. I tried so hard. I didn't yell at you, return the insults, and was incredibly patient.I always tried to communicate with you. I was ALWAYS honest and open.

You think when I communicate with you these things I am trying to guilt trip you. That I am criticizing you or mocking you. That is not the case. I love you I know you love me. This is how relationships fix their problems.

You're doing that again. You're saying if you're so horrible then why am I with you. At the same time, you tell me you hate how you are, that you don't want to be like that.

You are a good person with a mental disorder. I understand who you are. I love that woman.

>>17841859
>Whenever I needed you most you told me I wasn't for you.
This is not true. This is not true at all. I was always there for you my tiny baby.

You were so clearly talking to others, looking for their company during that time. You did not ask me to be there for you. You did what you're doing now. Going to excessive lengths to push me away.

My darlin, I can take the abuse you give me. I can take the belittling. That's not what hurt me ever. I always shrugged it off knowing you were just under a psychosis. That you never meant those things.

What I couldn't take were the lies. The obvious lies.

Have they given you medication yet my baby? The mild anti-psychotics like abilify? Therapy is simply not enough. The wiring in your mind is not normal and alters your reality. The chemicals that trigger the neurons are either not there, or not being accepted.

This is why you cannot tell me the truth. This is why you have to always lie to me. Your mind makes it nearly impossible, creates a barrier of psychosis to protect itself from the feelings of guilt and fear. Fear of losing someone you truly love. The one person you have ever felt genuine love for.

I would not leave, however. If I knew the truth. I can take the insults, abuse, and more if you at the very least told me the truth.

I love you so much. I understand why things happened, I am empathetic to your disorder. I am extremely educated in the matter and experience it myself. If there is one man in the entire world that is capable of knowing the real you... it's me. You know this. I know you better than you think I do. This is why I fell in love.

I will never judge you.

I forgive you for the things I know you've done and I will forgive you for the others.

You're my love. My muse. My best friend.

(I also know this is more than likely not even you but whatever. If you could tell me something only we know, give me proof... or just message me on skype or email).

>>17841859
>I remember that, I remember you broke my heart right before Christmas

I needed to say.

This is the problem darlin. You are leaning on the wall. You are failing to take responsibility for your actions. You refuse to accept the fact you were the cause of the breakup. You were extremely abusive, manipulative, irrational, and compulsive liar. Saying I broke your heart is being dishonest. Go back and re-read those conversations.

Please stop leaning on the wall. Please start being honest with yourself. You need to start telling the truth. You need to be able to recognize that your pain comes from your actions. I did not force you to do anything. They were all your choices. It was your choice to lie to me when we got back together. It was your choice to not call the dr, to not call a therapist, and to keep talking to those people behind my back. They were all YOUR ACTIONS. THE CONSEQUENCES ARE YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.

You will not get better until you are able to take responsibility. To face me, talk to me.

That guilt is the proof you're a good person.

Be honest to yourself and let that good person come out.

You know I will not judge you. You know this. You know I love you truly.

You know I am a good man. Good people forgive. Good people are empathetic.

You know I can relate with you. I can.

I'm right here telling you all of this while KNOWING the WORST of the things you've been hiding from me. I know what happend but not the details.

I would and will forgive you for the rest. I already do.

For your sake (and mine)... talk to me.

Start small. Just a hello.

I love you. It'll be ok.

(if this is her. At least she will read this)

Remember how we used to fire our finger guns and make kissing noises? Heh. I hope you're well.

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How can everyone at my school be so calm?! Final exams are next week and everybody is just playing video games and visiting out-of-town family! I don't get it.

Jeez, this thing is is complicated. I still want to do this, but it is not as simple as everyone claims it is, and it's taking me quite a bit of time, too (although it's entirely possible that this is just me). I would be totally lost were it not for the tutorials.
Also, I wish I could just stop thinking about it at least for the next couple days. I REALLY want this, and I'm willing to put in the effort to learn, but I can't be thinking about it right now, no matter how badly I want to. It also kind of sucks that I'm going to have to wait for at least a month before I can finally see the fruits of my effort. Oh, well. It's only a month. Just focus on the task at hand and wait...soon, you'll be free to explore, learn, and prepare to your heart's content...

I'm getting too obsessed with my boyfriend. It's only been three months. I need to slow down. I worry that I'm making him uncomfortable.

>in bed on the phone doing some light shitposting
>feel myself not interested in it like I used to be
I used to shitpost4dayz now I can barely get any shitposting done even though I spend most of my day in front of the computer.

I've lost my finesse and je ne sais quoi now nothing brings me joy anymore.

I blame the mass produced shitposting, these days everything is about the (you)'s and nobody ever does it for the laugh and love of the game anymore.

Are you kidding me? So I practically wasted that entire afternoon?! Wow. Fuck you, IT department.

Thank you life for just making her just a friend. It was nice but it's not for me.

>wow anon why don't you call that store you applied to a couple weeks ago since you don't have a life or a car t. mother

>tfw the application was literally 5 days ago
>implying jobs give people lives
ree