Fuck all that

>>17826277
Go on some kind of hedonistic lifestyle binge then.
Honestly if you hadn't openly said you didn't like religion, I'd suggest turning to one. I'm not religious, but they seem to give someone purpose.

It sounds like you've had a shit year, and you have my sympathies. But life is random and unfair, and you just have to suck that up and go on living.

Read some existentialist books, if you want other more considered opinions on the subject.

>>17826277
You're a nihilist, which means you're mentally ill but a step closer to being woke.

>>17826346
also this; read Camus.

>>17826357
>>17826277
>>17826357
The Myth of Sisyphus is the best, but start with The Plague or L'etranger if you're not a reader.
If you really don't know how to get started, check out some of /lit/'s recommended stuff, but for the love of god, do not just ask them for 'Existential Books'

>>17826277
>Now I want to enjoy life as much as I can, I want to fuck everyone I can, take drugs if I want, and end my life either fucking or fighting. Am I crazy or awakening?

The things you want to do will most likely lead to a lot of unnecessary drama. If you're going to behave like a shitty person you will become surrounded with other shitty people.

You want to fuck lots of girls because you want validation and approval from them.
You want to take drugs because you're unhappy and you want to escape reality.

You're not having an epiphany, you're not "awakening", you're following the same path that millions of fuckups have followed before you, and you're probably not going to become happier for it.

You can enjoy life without being a degenerate. You can get what you want out of life while having morals and being honest and not being a piece of shit. But its hard and requires effort

Maybe try reading No More Mr Niceguy by Dr Robert Glover, maybe what he describes early in the book sounds like you? Maybe it doesn't? I dunno.
http://bookzz.org/book/2596380/8cb846

>>17826353
? In what way?

To the others : thank you for the recommendations.

>>17826277
life isnt shit, its pretty good and if it was up to life you would be perfectly happy
think of yourself as a clock, you are created a perfectly functioning clock with thousands of little gears all working in harmony.
You give the time perfectly for years but the you meet new people and the people who knew change and every time you see someone they break some of yourgears a little bit
at first you dont nottice, then you are a couple seconds off and then people start breaking a lot and you are minutes off then hours and all you want is to be alone
and then you are alone but you are broken, you cant fix yourself, other people cant fix you either it just you alone giving the wrong time forever

>>17826445
Interesting analogy. And then?

>>17826464
thats it?

>>17826486
Meant : so what?

>>17826508
well its just that, its not the world you should blame but other people
you have to understand that society and freedom are opposittes that cant coexit
you where born and inmediately a set of rules and expectations got forzed onto you and you had no say on the matter
and you can talk bout education, parenting, therapy or wathever else you want but the truth is that society in a sink or swim way, all in shit that got put in place thousands of years before you got born? if you are the kind of person that fits the mold perfectly you are going to have a great time, otherwise you are going to get hurt a lot because society inst there for you, people arent there for you, it isnt just, it isnt fair and under some other rules it would have been completely different
never belive anyone who tells you they are better than you, they arent they are lucky to be born in a society that favour them over you