ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

I could use advice form both genders on this one,

I have developed feelings for a friend of mine and I'm pretty sure she doesn't feel the same way (I have no idea for sure so I'm guessing but let's say it's true for this post), I think I need to cut her out of my life so I can get over her. How can I cut her out without her being hurt from me ignoring her?

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straight girls

Do you really find the average male body attractive? Whats the appeal?

I am not talking about Chad Thundercock ripped.

>>17825707
>Do you really find the average male body attractive?
Sure
>Whats the appeal?
Big, warm, fun to cuddle. What's not to like?

>>17825707
This would be great if he was slightly more muscular (shoulders/pect/arms).
I still think it's decently attractive, like a 5/10. It doesn't have anything particularly good about it, or anything particularly bad. It's normal. I don't mind normal.

Advice for feeling lost in life? Just hit 25 and I feel like my life is just fucked. I'm more depressed than I've ever been in my life, and suicide honestly keeps becoming a more and more comfortable thought. I honestly feel like all I can do in life is max out my credit and empty my bank accounts and get in my car and try to start again somewhere else or just offing myself. I'm just tired of my life. I feel trapped with no way out

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I like dating controlling men. I pretty much told this to my ldr bf of a year.
Is that weird. Is there a name for wanting this. I get turned on when a guy tells me stuff like
>no you can't go out and drink tonight.
I like the control.
Daddy issues perhaps?

>>17825731
Give it some time and work on small changes. Maybe adopt a puppy

Anyone really.

I girl in my class talks to me a lot. Sits next to me every class, always has spare paper if I need any, laughs a little to hard at my jokes, takes the same bus as me even if it's a bit out of her way. So I figured she likes me.
After class asked her if she was in a hurry to get home and she said no, than I asked her to go to a caffe and get some tea with me. To witch she just said no.
Rejection in my book.
I figured if I liked someone and they ask me to do stuff I'd jump at the opportunity.
I figured if she continues the affectionate behavior towards me I might try one more time in a few weeks. And if she rejects me again i just kinda ghost her and ignore her.
Good idea bad idea? Any advice is welcome since I haven't dated for quite a while due to a long term relationship.

>>17825782
Sounds like a plan

>>17825599

I get what you are saying with the idea that "We can always give it a shot!" as being a non-committal "Yes"

That she will be willing to try, but is unsure just what she wants out of it.

Maybe she want to just see where it will lead naturally. She is not gonna necessarily push for something serious, but won't shy away if it does come to that.

Or she might just want something casual even.

Who knows until they try it I guess?

>>17825707
O god yes. Not even just the average ones. But in a different way than it seems to work for men.

What I like about the male body is the feral quality - the bodyhair, the bigger features. It's the masculine smell of fresh sweat, the feeling of a hard dick against my body. Facial hair and a low voice.

That's not to say I don't find anything nice to look at. I love male hands, I love the contrast between a heavier male body and the frailty of collar bones, a slender neck, wrists etc. I love the sight of a good male chest + stomach combination any day. But visual stuff isn't that important. My attraction to men feels like sex itself: yeah if you rationalize it, it doesn't sound appetizing on paper. But it does make the bones in my body melt.

Plus I don't find visual stuff that important. I don't like porn much either, I want to fantasize about smells, touches and noises. When I see a man like your pic related, I don't picture his naked body. I picture him pressing his big hand down on my stomach while I feel his erection against my ass as he's murmuring dirty stuff so I feel his hot breath on my neck and I can tell by his thick voice just how much he's into it.

Hope that paints you somewhat of a picture.

>>17825790
Also wanted to add that I did not mean to imply that this is the "female way". I know of women who are more into the visual aspect of attraction than I am and eg love male ass. That's all secondary to me, though I do very much want to see my lover when going at it but more for the extra eye contact and smiles etc than for anything else.

Also I still don't feel that I got it completely right. I do like to look at men's bodies, for example, but I pay more attention to the "physicality" of it my head (wishing I could smell him or undress him to feel his bare skin against mine more than picturing his physique itself) and the way he moves his body, how he sits. For example I really like it when men play with something or drum their fingers, or sit with their hands draped closer around their crotch than would be normal for girls.
It's like paying more attention to both the extreme details (like peach fuzz and skin smell) and the global stuff (like how he moves and the entire picture of the person he is) than the typical "oh she has a good waist hips ratio".

>>17825702
You don't have to make a declaration of love to make it obvious that your feelings have gotten in the way. Something akin to
>I started to see you in a different light lately and it makes it hard for me to appreciate our friendship what it is, sorry to distance myself but I need some space

If she does not understand/respect that, that doesn't reflect well on her.

I turn 30 next week.
I have a lot of shit I'm going through, and I'm feeling at my wits end.

Last year I met someone from speed dating. Stuck it in her, ended up moving with her. Turns out she's also depressive/threatens suicide if I leave (and she lost her mom in this manner, so I doubt it's 100% a mindgame). Sex has dried up, to maybe once a month if lucky.

I'm really at that phase where I wish I could start over. I didn't get to enjoy my 20s. Dating never went anywhere. My job is unfulfilling but at least it pays somewhat. And I got formally diagnosed with Asperger's earlier this year, which really had fucked with my own state of well-being.

Is there any way to salvage my current state of affairs? Ideally I want to be able to:
-Fix things with my roommate, find some way to get us back to liking each other. She had to like something about me in the first place, and it's unfair to hold my AS against me.
-if she doesn't budge, and I want to leave, I need some way to do so while knowing she's not a danger to herself.

Should I consider finding someone else to help mediate? I've been good about going to therapy for my own issues but she's very inconsistent with her own schedule too.

I'm honestly worried that if I stay with her longer, I'll reach a point where I hope she does off herself. I'm really at my ropes end, because I'm constantly sacrificing my own free time, and peace of mind in the sake of helping her find happiness that she won't even attain, while she takes everything I do for her granted.

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>>17825775

>>17825731
This isn't really the kind of stuff that anyone online can help you with with a handful of words. Sure it's important to get enough sleep (and not too much, 7-9 hours a night) and eat well because whatever mental stuff is happening physical stuff also impacts your brain and outlook on the world. And it's easy to say stuff like, leave your comfort zone, go on a quest to make new friends if you've given up anyway, do a 180 and try something entirely different... But you'll likely need more structural encouragement to get out of this if it's possible.

>>17825775
Yeah it kind of sounds to me like you drew the strong conclusion from your childhood/upbringing that being strict and controlling equals caring.

Also makes me think this is partly a sexual thing given your picture, if that's the case maybe you can see if you can get your desire to be controlled in check by having it be a bigger part of your sex life so you perhaps won't feel the desire to date a guy who's actually trying to keep you on a leash.

>>17825782
Don't ghost her, you'll look resentful. But that sounds weird as fuck, did she really say nothing other than "no"? Very promising signs too.

>>17825804
This is perfect, thank you.

>>17825811
Yeah, consult your therapist about how to handle breaking up with her. Breaking up with her is not optional, she's dragging you down and you're only prolonging the inevitable.

I know this is really hard, but you have to let go of the whole "I never got to enjoy my twenties" spiel if you don't want it to turn into "I never got to enjoy my twenties or thirties" spiel. Does it fucking suck? Hell yes. But there is nothing you can do about it now and you will only cement yourself in your head as some loser who's having life pass him by if you keep putting energy into these thoughts. The whole "adolescence is the highlight of life" is a cultural trope, it's individual when you feel best during your lifetime and in fact people self-report the biggest happiness when they are older (60+) even though according to society they should feel like useless bags of shit then. Yeah when you are young you have practical options (of dating around, meeting people easily etc) but lots of people also have crippling anxiety, insecurity, ego issues etc that prevent them from taking life as it comes and enjoying themselves the most.

What IS worthwhile is thinking about what you want to do with your life, learning more about what your Aspergers entails and how to deal with it optimally, trying to keep perspective with this being a low point. It'll be very difficult but one day you'll look back on all this as a memory.

Why are the 'I have fallen for my friend' questions always the guy falling for a girl?

>>17825831
No problem at all!

>>17825834
They happen the other way around, I've been in the situation twice for what it's worth. But I think it's more common for guys (when young, at least) to go with the sex and then try to steer towards FWBs. So it turns into "my FWB doesn't want a relationship".

>>17825834
Because most posters here are desperate males.

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>>17825784
Pretty much.
>>17825821
Yeah, all I got was a no. Pretty direct rejection. I kinda appreciate it more than some bullshit excuse come to think about it.
>Don't ghost her, you'll look resentful.
I'm not really sure how to deal with it, I don't want to end up an orbiter if I develop serious feels, and I don't want it to seem like somebody is orbiting me. Figured getting some distance might be the best idea.

>>17825856
Yeah but I would at least expect her to say "no, I'm not interested in a date/spending time with you outside of what we already do" or something, but okay.

>I'm not really sure how to deal with it
You can distance yourself but be polite, friendly yet a bit impersonal whenever she hits you up and there's no way to avoid it. I just meant that if you stop responding to any of her shit or something it looks weird. People fade all the time on friendships they are no longer interested in, honestly it's the most accepted adult way to end a relationship that has no animosity but no spark/interest anymore either. Just cutting down on frequency/intensity until they get the hint or forget about you.

>>17825841
I don't think those guys are actually fucking their friends.

>>17825863
Unless I misunderstand your post I didn't mean to imply that, just that guys tend to shut it down at a later stage than girls do so it gets a different label (especially from a hopeful infatuated girl who's trying to make their connection as meaningful and close to a romantic relationship as possible) than an unrequited crush in a friendship.

>>17825862
I agree with you completely the terminology was off that was all.

Thanks anon.

>>17825869
Then consider it unsaid and good luck!

>>17825775
You dont have daddy issues, but you may be a fulltime submissive. I think this is ok as long your bf agrees to be your Dom.

Guys

To preface, I'm fairly certain this guy I like knows I like him. Also, I'm unable to date him until I quit in a few months because of workplace relation rules. So, here's my dilemma:

I flirt with this guy like crazy, he flirts back. He's very sweet, enjoys hugging me, listens and remembers our conversations, every goddamn sign in the book of reciprocated affection. He is currently pursuing other women, because he's lonely as shit and still reeling from the self-esteem damage his ex offered him. However, the only reason I know he's pursuing other women, is because he'll only tell me of his relationship blunders. He NEVER tells me success stories, until after I pried it out of him recently. He told me he got home very late this weekend and I asked why. He was very reluctant to tell me, but I kept probing, and he eventually confessed that he was binge watching movies with someone. He failed to mention the gender of this person, and tried making it seem platonic as possible.

I think he only tells me of his blunders because he wants to keep me along as a second choice/ego boost. I don't think it's because he wants to spare my feelings, because he told me of one of his recent dates before and I was happy when I heard he found someone (until I let him finish, and he told me how it failed). So it's not like I've reacted sorely to the proposal of him liking someone. My conclusion is that because this date went well, he didn't want to tell me, because he wants me to continue to flirt with him.

Honestly, I'm not sad at the prospect of being rejected. I'm just sad because I've put so much effort in only to be used as an ego boost the whole time. At least in being FRIENDZONED, you're clearly valued for the awesomeness your friendship offers. Here, I feel like my worth was equated to making him feel handsome. It's shitty, and I'm not sure what move to make next, which is why I post.


Also, in case that anon from before appears, yes, I'm no more excuses anon.

>>17825832
Thank you for your response. I'm grateful to my roommate as she has actually helped me out with a lot of small things, but I'm at that point where if she doesn't fix her "I hate your AS" trip she's going through, we're done. I know I need to protect my own happiness.

Regarding self-regret, what else do you think would help? I've noticed a few small things trigger it, mostly thinking about college and the years after.

I got into blacksmithing as a hobby this year. I went to a smith meet near my old college a few months ago (about a 3-hour drive) then decided to visit the campus to see what had changed...and then I decided to go out and explore the town, hit up a few bars, etc. In four hours, I explored more of the city than I had in four years as an undergraduate!

I honestly feel that's my major hangup, that some basic social training (rather than always being YELLED AT) would have helped a, and it didn't even take *that* much help. Why wasn't it there when I needed it the most?

I need to focus on my own strengths. I'm not "brilliant" at programming but I have an ocd-ish attention to detail, and have found many a bug by noticing a single missing character buried in thousands of lines. I've taken criticism too closely to heart, to the point it's crippling, but I've gotten better at fixing my shortcomings, and am actually good at keeping a schedule.

What do I want? To develop for a company that does products, rather than internal banking software. Maybe to take a year off and make an indie game. A girl that's at least more recognizing of nerd-ish stuff (Dragoncon frolicking maybe?) rather than comparing my nerdness to Sheldon.

Mostly, to feel like I'm not weak, that I can overcome the social blindness/literalness, while being able to benefit from the internal discipline/attention to detail.

Thanks. I'm going to see how this plays out. I should view this as the first time I can really enjoy life the way I want rather than just trying to survive.

>>17825896
>>17825896
I kinda make it a rule not to talk to girls I like about other girls or my sex life, or pretty much anything you wouldn't tell your girlfriend. If I DO talk to a girl about other girls it's because I'm sure she's not interested in me and I'm not interested in her and she directly asks me. If a girl I like asked me I would try to dodge the subject as best as I can.
Maybe it's the environment that prevents you from being together that makes him think you're off the table and hence is more comfortable talking about it.
I can't get in to the guys head though. You won't know until you ask him out.

>>17825900
I'm honestly confused now whether your roommate is your FWB or there's both a girlfriend and a roommate.

Either way, self-regret. Short term, there isn't much you can do. Do not indulge these thoughts. Keep a few lines ready (like "don't get into this negativity, you can't use that" or "there's no point in dwelling on the past" or whatever else speaks to you the most) to cut yourself short when you find your thoughts heading in this direction. It won't be any solution but if you allow yourself to sort of pick at the scab all the time that'll make it that much harder to move on.

As for more structural things, I've been in your position (not literally at all but I absolutely felt like I'd missed out on stuff) and the thought that helped me most was to realize that okay, you might not have had these experiences that you wanted, but you did learn/went through other things. Eg I was always really self-conscious about never dating and being a virgin, but now when I compare myself to people who have been in relationships throughout their teens and early twenties I feel like I can be alone much better, know myself and what I want out of life much better. Plus I would not have been nearly as creative if not for all the boredom and idle time to practice. Not to say that you can't have both, but for me being alone so much absolutely did me some solid favors on top of being depressing most of the time.
What's more, these early social experiences aren't always one-sidedly positive. Sometimes especially the people who have always had friends they didn't have to do anything for don't realize you need to invest in these bonds and end up alone when they are older and don't naturally run into their friends anymore. Or the girlfriend/boyfriend they had as a teenager instilled some pretty fucked up perspective of what's "normal" in a relationship in them. You will realize more of this stuff when you grow closer to people who lived life differently.

>>17825909
He's a weird one, honest to fucking god, which is why I ask. I love his strangeness but in events like this, he becomes a confusing character.

Should I do something for him on valentines day? One last try until I move on, myself? I'm deliberating really badly over it.

>>17825918
But the single biggest thing was that when I grew happier I just started to care less. The past became less important as my present and future started to look brighter.

I do have more practical advice for this
>Why wasn't it there when I needed it the most?
Try your hardest not to identify with this guy. When you think of him, think of him as a child, with empathy and understanding, feel sorry for him that he wasn't given what he needed to thrive. Maybe even write your younger self a letter with council and insights from your current self.
You want to avoid psychologically keeping yourself small by seeing yourself as this helpless guy who felt overwhelmed by life when you're someone else now. So when you think of him don't just remember it from first person view but remember this was a boy who grew into the man you currently are.

It sounds like you actually have a pretty good grasp on what you're talented at and what you long for in life, that's the most important start. You can branch out from there. Best of luck!

>>17825775
probably a sub kink
>>17825834
4chan is predominantly male
also probably misreading "not being an asshole" as "romantic flirting" which is more of a statement about society and the human condition than anything
>>17825896
just agree with his sob story and he'll stop sharing with you
>"Man i really fucked up that date last week"
>"yeah and you'll probably fuck up the next two"

>>17825896
Men love self-deprecation. Anything else comes off as bragging. He doesn't want to brag that's like a total like player and like bangs all the women. But his failures are funny anecdotes that might make you (and others) laugh.

There's no ill intent, I assure you.

>>17825919
Valentines day is a long way away.
If you stretch out flirting and courting too long men just kinda assume it's the way things are. That you're just like that and they flirt back.
If i where you I'd ask him out and be direct about it, sooner is better than leter. "Hey anon I developed a bit of a crush on you, wanna come see the new star wars move with me? I'll buy popcorn if you buy the tickets." Or something about those lines. Men are dumb.

>>17825931
Oh my god, lol. Another friend of mine suggested I be mildly dickish to him like that. I'm almost considering it, just to feel better, but he's a sweetheart. I wouldn't want to do that to him and he's already been through some shit.

Plus, I'm not upset that he's pursuing other people, or that he's telling me about when he does. So this wouldn't solve anything. Thank you though, you made me laugh.

>>17825934

Oh he's all about self-deprecation, very true. I actually get pissed off with him about that because too much self-deprecation is unhealthy. You think he doesn't reciprocate anything then? Just telling me a story for shits and giggles?

>>17825935

I've been considering it. The work situation gets in the way a little bit though. Lot of hassle for one girl.

>>17825943
I think there is a chance that he may be flirting with other girls, just because you've been flirting with each other for so long with nothing really coming of it, but I don't think there's ill intent. I don't think he's hiding it from you to string you along or anything like that. Lots of men, especially those who are self-deprecating in general, would rather share their car crashes than their success stories. Men bond over taking the piss out of each other, throwing out insults they don't mean, and it's easier to initiate that bonding with a story of failure than a story of success, because the story of failure means you get to laugh at/with him and throw some insults at him that you don't mean.

Girls, assuming you liked having your ass spanked in bed what other things in a similar vein do you think you would like?

>>17825950
I suppose you're right. I just wish that if he just wanted to have that kind of friendship, he'd stop flirting with me. I'd be completely down for just goofing and joshing around with him as platonic friends, but the flirting confuses my tiny reptile brain.

>>17825925
My roommate is my FWB, though there's emotional entanglement on top of that. We've been together long enough that the real question is whether she can accept that even though I'm able to work on the parts of me that are AS, other parts are always going to be there. I think in her case, there's her own internal conflict between liking me for me, or liking the potential of me becoming her ideal guy. Either way, she and I need to talk more.

I may write that letter, but I think for now I really do need to focus on what I want in the future. I've grown up considerably since I was that isolated creepy guy, and I should focus more on having made it where I am rather than comparing myself to what should be normal.

>>17825953
I like my ass spanked but not sure if I'm most exemplary because I'm generally not submissive and assume your girl is?

If that hunch is right I'd try:
>nibbling (neck, earlobes)
>pulling her hair (at the roots)
>heavy hand on the back of her head when she's going down on you
>pushing her up against something/down on something
>dominant dirty talk like giving commands, telling her not to cum until you tell her so etc
>tying up her hands/arms

>>17825955
>that kind of friendship
It's not a special kind of friendship reserved for you. That's just how men get along with each other. That's how we spend our whole lives interacting with each other. The onus is on you to break him from that, if you want to. The flirting not leading to anything had probably confused his tiny reptile brain too, so he reverts to default. Self-deprecation. Ask him out. Next time you're flirting, just say something as simple as "We should hang out sometime" and watch his demeanor change. From what little I know of your situation, it seems like you're both inadvertantly talking past each other. Where he thinks you've friendzoned him because your interest has never moved beyond simple flirting, so he acts like any old friendship and you think he's friendzoned you, so you step off the gas a little, which leads to him seeing the flirting leading to nothing, which leads to him acting like a friend, which leands to you stepping off the gas etc. etc.

why do women agree to do something and then just totally ignore you afterwards

what's so difficult about saying no in the first place... this kind of rejection feels like getting slapped in the face twice instead of once

>>17825972
Because it's awkward to reject someone so they tend to say yes in the spur of the moment, and then when they're alone and dwell on it longer they start dreading the prospect more. Especially once they realize they're not going to be interested and it's probably going to be tougher to reject the guy after a date than before one.

This is provided it's a date or something and they weren't actually oblivious to other people not having constant changing plans. Those exist as well.

>>17825963
Honestly, I think you're on to something here. It genuinely feels like "stepping on/off the gas" on both our parts. We constantly test how far we're willing to go with eachother in regards to what we talk about or how we interact. I remember when we had only known eachother for a few weeks, he accidentally made an innuendo around me and apologized profusely afterwards. I ended up actually responding favorably, and nowadays he makes unbelievably sexual jokes at nearly every opportunity. I know it's a stupid example, but it's just one of the many times where we gauged eachother on how far we're allowed to go.

So...I suppose I could push it further? I'm only willing to do that (asking him out) after I've quit though. Not worth it to risk both of our jobs right now. Although there comes the concern if it being too late? He's "cruising and perusing" right now, he could very well find someone...especially considering how he spent his weekend.

>>17825955
Maybe he's not intentionally flirting with you. I do it with my friends' gfs all the time.

>>17825979
You don't need to start "officially" dating, if you know what I mean. Just pick a day and ask him if he wants to go see a movie, or just hang out or something. Something outside of work where it's clear that you decided "I like you. I want to spend more time with you. I'm going to ask you to spend more time with me." Give him a reason to believe there's something there worth waiting for.

>>17825943
he keeps self-depreciating because you're giving him the validation he wants. it seems really childish to be a dick about it, but once he figures out that his sympathy-well is dry he'll stop doing it

>>17825985
>self-deprecation
>sympathy-well
Are you a woman?

>>17825977
It might be my autism but that last sentence is really hard to understand lol

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>>17825989

>>17825983
What kind of things would you do? I'm curious, because honestly, if it weren't for our work situation, I wouldn't be so unsure of how he feels about me. Other guys I've dated have flirted with me to less "extremes".

>>17825984

That sounds ideal. I'll try to do this tomorrow. See how it goes.

>>17825985

Yeah, it does annoy me a little bit how much he disses on himself. He thinks it's funny/true but it's not healthy to talk about yourself/think about yourself so lowly like that. I do worry he likes me because I give him validation. I've had to drop many friends because they kept me around for that one reason. I can only hope that's not our situation... how do you think I can tell the difference? He's so sweet to me that I don't THINK I'm just a validation center... but..fuck I don't know man.

>>17825990
Nah it's probably not you, it's not my first language and it's late here, the wording was sloppy.

What I meant is that the first part of the answer is assuming it was an actual date, with little grey area in between engaging and ignoring someone.
If you mean you were just going to hang out with a girl and she didn't follow up on planning, it could be different. Some people are really easy and popular and always have stuff to do, so plans tend to be a bit "provisional" until they officially confirm. They just forget about having said "oh yeah that sounds like fun" and don't think any of it.

>>17825998
Tell us then how it went, if I may ask.

>>17826003
I'll try my best, lol. I'm usually more cowardice in person. I'm surprised I even got this far with him.

>>17825998
Well I talk to someone to not look like a loser, but my natural desperation (and I imagine odor?) makes them think I'm hitting on them.

>>17825996
Self-deprecation isn't a dive into the "sympathy well" and it isn't a search for validation, at least, not the kind of validation you think it is. One self-deprecates to establish the boundaries of a relationship and create interactions within them. If I say I have a big nose, you can say I have a big nose. That means you can make a joke at my expense without fear of me being hurt by it. Self-deprecation is a tool which has enabled man to very quickly establish friendships and subsequently grow and define those friendships further without wasting any time beating around the bush. Self-deprecation is an evolutionary trick to promote social cohesion.

>>17825998
What the fuck is a validation centre? What is wrong with validating men if you like him??????? I AM CONFOOZ

>>17826008
Ah. I don't know then... I think I'm in the clear.

>>17826010
Lol I don't know man! I love making him happy and boosting his ego/self confidence/self esteem, it's really not an issue for me. But I don't want to be friends with him to only do that. I want to have a good time with him too.

>>17825998
Oddly enough, when men talk down about themselves, it's not a sign of insecurity in my experience at least. Him dissing himself isn't his way of telling you he hates himself. It's not like those girls on facebook posting snapchat filtered myspace angled selfies and saying "God, I'm so ugly today!" and waiting for the compliments to roll in.

It took me 21 years before I realised women don't realise this. I've spent well over a decade making fun of my own nose among my friends and having them make fun of it also. Then I met this girl and made an off-hand comment about having a big nose and she replied "Your nose isn't big. It looks normal to me." and it was really fucking weird for me. To the point where my train of thought was entirely broken and I almost couldn't progress in the conversation.

>>17826010
The problem comes from feeding into an ego. She's worried that he just sees her as a source of compliments to feed his ego instead of seeing her as a nice person that he should be attracted to.

Very hard one, preferably for girls, but man that had been through something similar can give an opinion too

Trying to keep things as short as possible, me and my gf had a threesome with a girl from tinder. She didn't seem to be a total slut (I wouldn't mind if she was, not judging), never did something similar before, and was very cute and nice to us.

We went on a date one day and sex was just fucking amazing. Me and my gf are very cuddly and loving and she was a perfect match with us in every sense possible. She doesn't live in the same town as we, and left on the day after.

We convoed with her and she was very thankful for having that experience with us, made profuse complements to a lot of stuff we did and said she'd love to do that again with us. She shown that appreciation in person too so I'm 100% sure she was being honest.

Here's the hard part: we don't know how to keep in touch with her until the next time. She made a suggestion for the three of us to go on a trip toghether, and we suggested that she comes to our house after new years eve, and precisely after that she became kind of distant. I think that invitation might have scared her somehow, like we're trying to force a situation or are being too attached and suffocating to her. Should we try to apologize for that invitation? We're holding off to talking to her because we don't want to suffocate her texting her every day, but on the other hand we don't know if there's a reason for her to act like this, or if she's just really busy.

Wat do?

>tl;dr: how to keep in touch with lovely girl until our next threesome

>>17826026
Don't apologize. Your offer for New Year's was actually "softer" than her suggestion for a trip (presuming you mean something spanning multiple days, which is how I read it). Even if she meant a one day trip, it's not a huge leap to NYE.
I think it is more likely that she's becoming less interested, having second thoughts/cold feet whatever in general (if it's a loaded reason, as opposed to being busy or being in the first stages of a fresh relationship herself), and if that's the case then an apology will make you look more invested and thus more threatening. You want to keep things a bit more lighthearted, more causal. I'd just give her some space and in a week or three maybe send her a cute snapchat not relating to anything sexual but maybe a little inside joke about something safe (cats? food?).

>>17826023
Interesting! I'm looking at it completely differently now. It's funny -- he's taken to calling himself fat recently because he knows it makes me mad, and the one time I teasingly called him fat, he did this surprised little gasp. I immediately retracted my statement, because shit, he could actually think he's fat, but now I know he was likely just doing it only to piss me off.

Although, the fact that he is genuinely insecure about some specific things (his hairline) fosters some confusion. I just fear he'll internalize something I teased him about. Though I suppose there's nothing I can do about that, blah.

>>17826040
Does he often ridicule his hairline? I find most men, hell most people in general, don't ever try to draw attention to their insecurities unless someone else draws attention to them first, in which case they play it up with lots of laughing and absurdity to distract from the situation.

>he's taken to calling himself fat recently because he knows it makes me mad, and the one time I teasingly called him fat, he did this surprised little gasp.
That gasp was him taking the piss out of you. He was mocking you by calling attention to you breaking your norm, thereby pointing out that your norm is silly to him. That's a good thing, by the way. Sounds like you've definitely been talking past each other then. Best of luck with the asking him to hang out thing.

And stop thinking so much. Lord knows us men aren't known for it.

Hi everybody.
Just have a quick question for the girls.
I was called up by a girl i know as a friend.
She asked me out on a date.
We met at the theater and i paid for both tickets and the popcorn.
We watched allied.
It had a sad ending.
We both went to the washroom.
As I came out, she was already walking away.
I asked her why she was leaving she didn't give me a real answer.
Then she started running away and i asked her again why she was running she gave me some kind of weak answer.
So, my question is why would she run away, we usually hang out after doing something.
It just seems strange that she would run away from me i didn't do anything wrong.

>>17826051
No, not often, but when attention is drawn to it, he gets all sullen and gloomy. That's how I know he's actually insecure about it.

>He was mocking you by calling attention to you breaking your norm, thereby pointing out that your norm is silly to him. That's a good thing, by the way. Sounds like you've definitely been talking past each other then.

I'm happy it's a good sign, I really enjoy goofing with him like this. Thanks for the luck, too.

>And stop thinking so much. Lord knows us men aren't known for it.

This, I can't help, I fear. Though I wish I could, christ. Overthinking has been acting as a safety net for me lately, preparing for every possible outcome, but then it pulls shit like this where all outcomes are just as likely and I'm distraught as hell.

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>>17826034

Yeah your opinion has gone through my head just today, honest. I'm afraid apologizing might make us feel more "all over" her than simply not saying anything for a while and letting it cool off.

The offer was to come to our house after nye and stay for a few days, but all of us have been very clear that it was more like a fwb deal and that we never wanted to push her or force her into anything, but inviting her as we did might have sounded like we crossed that line.

And as you said, I think she's getting cold feeted. She was very clear that she wasn't looking for a bf anytime soon, but I noticed that everyone was too much into everyone. It was a powerful experience, specially for her since it was her first and so good (we had two other threesomes, not nearly as good, but we're a bit mode experienced). I think she might be having second toughts now, because she really seemed "in love" (strong term but I can't think in anything better now) with us, but it might be very confusing to nurture feelings for a well stabilished couple as we are.

We're trying to give her space and avoid texting her for a while already. It's hard because both of us really liked her, but it sure is for the best. How long should we wait though, a time frame that allows her some space but also shows that we care for her beyond just sex? A week? More?

(I might sound alpha for doing threesomes but I've always been clumsy with that kind of thing)

>also, pic related

>>17826009
self-depreciation is not healthy, no one likes the pity party. you know what builds friendships better than cutting yourself down? being a decent person

>>17826072
>self-deprecation is about pity
>self-deprecation and being a good person are mutually exclusive
Woman confirmed.

>>17826072
Just butting in here, he's definitely a good person. If anything, the self-deprecation just makes me feel bad for him/worry about him. He purportedly doesn't have too many good people in his life, so I'm just scared that the stuff he bags on about himself is actually getting to him.

Guys and girls, what do you do if you fall in love with a married friend?

They're one of my better friends and I don't want to fuck that friendship up but every time I spent time with them my heart wants to burst out of my chest.

>>17826069
It absolutely will. You don't just come up on her radar again but in a pretty serious way that shows you care. Which is not a bad thing, it could just be overbearing right now, a bit too intense.

It could be that the experience was bittersweet for her. If she was that taken with both of you, it must be a pretty sobering realization to come to on your own afterwards that they share this whole emotional bond and shared history and you just warmed yourself in their heat for a moment. Whether or not you experience it that way, if she's insecure she could easily feel as your toy. Any way you wish to look at it, she's your spare. On top of everything else, she's the third girl to be your plus one. That can be a lonely and uncomfortable position to be in. It could well be that she didn't feel that way when she was basking in the glow of things going well, but you know how thoughts can creep up when you're alone after an impactful event.

I'd wait a few weeks. Two at least, four at most to show you haven't forgotten her.

I'm a woman.

Females:
1) girl and i had arranged to watch something together
2) she says she can't make it due to schoolwork and she proposes to watch it on another day
3) on said day i asked her personally to text me when i could come over, she agreed
4) she didnt text me at all

Why the hell would you propose a new day to leave me hanging anyway? This feels like shit

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>>17826075
stay mad, faggot

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>>17826099
>I'm not a woman, I'm actually a pubebeard nu-male! Ha! So there!

>>17826103
sick burn, broh. you're totally showing me. your friends and mother must be very impressed. truly a shining beacon of personal achievement in your community

>>17826109
>gets triggered and starts crying that I must be a terrible person that shames my friends and parents because I mocked his pubebeard on the internet
You're not proving me wrong.

>>17826098
No logical reason, she's just being shitty and flaky.

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Girls: Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who likes hentai or even futanari?

It's like I can never imagine being close and trusting enough to reveal that to someone.

Why would you keep an ex on your Facebook? He said maybe we should break things off, hasn't responded to my text but we're still Friends on FB?

>>17826085

I'm glad to see that a woman thinks exactly as I do about it. I fully agree that it might be tough for her and really wish there was something we could do about it, I just can't think of anything.

She living in another town made it bittersweet for all of us. She didn't intend to leave the day after it, but she had to get a ride with her coworker and he decided to go a day earlier. We were all expecting for a farewell date that didn't happen. I think if she lives here we'd still be going frequently, but since she's far away the bad toughts might be getting to her. Repeating myself, wish there was something we could do for her, but probably letting time run its course is the only good option now.

Thanks for your opinions so far, very helpful!

>>17826119
No, but I wouldn't give a fuck. I like weird stuff that my ex wasn't into. It's only a big deal if you're either obsessed with it or insist on bringing it to the bedroom.

>>17826114
ok man, whatever helps you get through the day

>>17826128
Why would that help me get through the day? You're the one who threw your hat into the ring here, not me. You're the one who decided to jump in and cry about men making jokes. You outed yourself. I had nothing to do with it.

>>17826123
I agree that there isn't anything you can do. You can give her space while simultaneously giving signals that your enthusiasm about her has been unchanged, but the brunt is up to her feelings. This could be a sweet arrangement for her as well - it's pretty rare to have a good fit with three individuals, and if she enjoyed herself a lot sexually and felt at ease with you that's more than she'd likely find anytime soon on tinder.
But she'd need the confidence and independence to appreciate the upsides without feeling bad about the downsides and that's nothing you have control over. I think a huge part of this is about how it fits in with the rest of her life, what it looks like in that context.

And of course there's the mundane, jittery initial phase stuff. Maybe she told a girlfriend who said that she could never be the third to a loving couple and it screwed with her head. Those things are pretty much bound to happen sooner or later and you'll have to await her final judgment.

Good luck, I hope it works out!

Girls, have you ever dated a manlet? (5'7'' and down)

Asking for a friend.

>>17826148
Manlet is 6'0" and shorter, and even that's a little on the short side. And no, I'm not desperate

>>17826148
No, but I crushed on one before he got together with his current girlfriend. (And I'm actually 5'8 myself.)

But I think it matters that my ex was 5'9 and gave me a thing for men of my height. Really great fit physically.

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>>17826147

Yea even the influence of a friend's opinion has crossed my mind too. Tough luck, guess we'll have to wait it out for a while.

Thanks again, so glad to see an opinion that really gets that experience and takes it seriously instead of just considering that girl a whore and us deviants and stuff like that. Have a pupper for your toughts

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I'll start off by saying,yes, I know I fucked up. Majorly. I really went off the deep end here.

I had a Summer fling with a deaf girl, which developed into an ambiguous LDR. I saw other girls during this time and told her about it. She got angry.

Just when I thought things were back on track and she moved to my city, I had to travel elsewhere for work 2 weeks later. She dropped contact after that, and less than a month later was seeing someone else.

Turns out he's a shitty version of me. I'm more athletic, earn more, have a bigger dick. I'm just not physically there. I talked her into promise rings, and to see me soon. She then changed her mind and dropped all contact with me. I got angry, and called her and a new partner a few things I shouldn't have, and that was the last time she talked to me.

I also found out at some point during this that she's been having unprotected sex with him, meaning shes potentially pregnant, and also potentially has cervical cancer.

As logical as it seems to move on - she feels like a perfect fit for me. I dream about her, and having kids together every night.

I've gone no contact anyway, and am working on learning sign language and hitting the gym hard. I'll be back in the same city next year, and will inevitably cross paths with her through the deaf community. What can I do during this time to show her that she made the wrong decision?

>>17826178
No problem at all, but the dog is very welcome nonetheless!

>>17826084

You get yourself a girlfriend and stop thinking about your friend.

Girls (guys too, i guess):

I kinda have a thing for one of my coworkers. I think she's also interested in me, but can't tell. That's not what I'm asking.

Anyway, lately I've noticed that she's either really talkative and happy to see me some days, and then other days she'll just flat out ignore me.

Take a few days ago, we were talking most of the shift and it was pretty fun. Today? She seemed pretty happy to see me when I got to work and she even said hi

But that was it. She walked past me a handful of times and barely even looked at me. Then when she was leaving she said by to one of my other coworkers and then just left even though I was standing right next to both of them.

It's really annoying and I can't tell if she's playing games with me, or if I'm some schmuck for thinking she could be into me in the first place. Either way, it sucks.

She'll completely disregard me as a person at least twice a week, too, and then act all normal and happy the next day. I think it's with just me since today and every other time she was acting normal to other coworkers. But with me, she's either talkative/engaging or distant and cold.

What do I do? I'm hesitant to ask her out if she is playing games (been there, don't want to deal with it) or if she doesn't even like me since that's pretty likely too. On the flipside, I really like talking to her when she actually does acknowledge that I even exist.

>>17826179
Just leave it. He could be a shittier version of you physically but he didn't cheat on her, that's a pretty serious advantage there.

You'll never both grow out of this resentment and your relationship was already not functioning well before she got together with him. Just accept that you fucked up and you need to move on.

>>17826184

So you hae a person that:

A) Is playing games

B) Has mood swings or

C) Doesn't really see you as a person

Tell us again why you wanna ask her out?

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>>17826184
>I kinda have a thing for one of my coworkers.

Don't. Just fucking don't.

I'm suffering for a couple of months now because I thought I could handle it, but it's a goddamn fucking mess that ended up nowhere with nothing.

>finally get new job
>mfw she got the same and literally comes after me a week after I start

>>17826197
She's nice (for the most part) and I like talking with her and spending time together

I'm not sure about her having moodswings, since they only seem to be directed at me. And the "her not seeing me as a person" thing is mostly cus some days she'll flat out ignore me besides saying "hi" or "bye" - even then she's sorta nice-ish, but sometimes she's really cold and bitchy sounding but then will be nice to everyone else. I don't even think I've done anything to make her mad.

I do, on occasion, get into moods where I don't want to talk to anyone...but at least I have the decency to ignore everyone instead of just her.

>>17826184

I'm a guy, but from what you're saying, it seems you're making her confused emotionally. Most likely she's already seeing someone else, have feelings for an ex, have a bf but is considering cheating, or any options that involve guilty feelings for you.

I say ask her out privatly someday that she's talking to you. At least you'll find out. To me, the rejection hurts much less than the doubt, the sooner you find out, the less it'll hurt and faster you'll overcome it. If she refuses, ask innocently "oh I'm sorry, I didn't ask before if you're seeing someone else"

>>17826213

So she treats you bad for no reason. What does she offer? Being nice "sometimes"?

Come on, you canxdo better.

>>17826023
>he should be attracted to.
*tips fedora* You shouldn't do nice things just to be attractive!!!!!

>>17826237
I was speaking from her perspective, obviously she feels he should be attracted to her, otherwise what's the point? Who the fuck asks someone out that they think won't be attracted to them? How little self-respect and self-esteem do you have that you feel people should find you unattractive?

Fuck off back to /r9k/.

>>17826220
>it seems you're making her confused emotionally
But all I'm doing is trying to be a decent person, if anything, she's the one confusing my emotions...

>Most likely she's already seeing someone else, have feelings for an ex, have a bf but is considering cheating, or any options that involve guilty feelings for you.
She broke up with her boyfriend sometime over the last month or so, so maybe that?

>>17826228
idk that anyone needs to offer anything in a relationship. I like her well enough but can't tell what her deal is sometimes and it's just a bit frustrating. Idk that I can do better, either, to be honest. Idk that it's her treating me badly since she's not really giving me any sort of treatment, if that makes sense. Maybe more neutral or "you're a stranger" than anything.

>>17826220
>I say ask her out privatly someday that she's talking to you.
I've been meaning to but either chicken out or don't get the chance because another coworker pops up out of nowhere and tries jumping in our conversation...

>>17826183
Is that the only way I'll be able to feel about her like I feel toward my guy friends?

I honestly don't know if I could get a girlfriend, at least not now.

>>17826249
*she broke up with her boyfriend over the last few months or so. Not the last month.

>>17826246
Obviously I felt I should be attractive too, but people told me I was an asshole for thinking that way.

>>17826258
Because then you'd be competition.

>>17826262
Bros before hoes is what bros tell other bros so they keep all their hoes... is that what you sayin?:??:

>>17826267
No. Bros before hoes "men over women". It means you don't drop your bro for a ho. That's different from keeping a bro while lessening his chances of landing a ho.

>>17826278
Ok. But if said bro had never heard bros before hoes, whats stopping him from going after your ho?

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How come when a slut moves on to a new guy she stops seeing the old one?

Doesn't she still like him?

>>17826281
Oh I get it, you're pretending to be retarded to save face. I'll stop replying now.

>>17826249

I didn't say you were doing it on purpose. She might be getting into you just because you're nice in a way she likes, even if it's just the same as you treat everyone else.

I'd place my bet on her having something going on with her ex, either still liking him or going out with him occasionally. But it shouldn't stop you, it might be the push she needs to go on her way and let go of her ex.

Try to cause a situation where the two of you will be alone for 5 minutes, I don't know what you work is like but kinda ask her out to grab a cup of coffee an hour after lunch, when it's either too soon or too late for everyone else to go after coffee too.

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If a girl doesn't kiss you on the first date, does that mean she doesn't like you?

I went on a date with a girl from tinder, and she drove out an hour to go out with me. We were both a little nervous, but at least from my perspective it seemed like she was interested in me. She kept saying things like I should come up to her town and see where she works, and I could borrow some of her vhs tapes since we're both interested in old media. At the end of the date she gave me a hug. So I thought that was a good sign.

But then my ex was asking about it later and she told me it wasn't a good sign that she didn't kiss me, and that she didn't like me and I'd fucked up. She said it was common for girls to have sex on the first date, so the fact that she didn't even kiss me meant she wasn't interested. Now, she is my ex, and she's said she still has feelings for me (she even still talks about wanting to have my babies someday ffs), so maybe she just doesn't want to admit that she doesn't like seeing me go out with another girl, but at the same time she is pretty smart when it comes to people.

I was texting the girl I went on the date with later and she said she wanted to hang out again. But then I've gone on a first date with a girl before who still wanted to hang out with me but didn't want to be my girlfriend. I dunno. What do girls and guys of /adv/ think about this situation? And what should I do next if I want to pursue a new relationship with this girl, who seemed pretty compatible with me?

>>17826292
No. You probably thought you were a super stud because you got more girls than your dorky friend, when in fact the dorky friend never went for the same girls, out of respect.

Why am I such an assshole to girls? I chat them up, and then a month later I just get bored of it and want to be alone and make them feel inadequate, every single time. They're the ones who approach me, I don't mean to do it, i don't set out to do it. I iliterally just can't help it. I always think it's going to be great at the start, then as a little bit of time goes by I just get bored and want to be left alone. And then right after not talking to the girl I start talking to ANOTHER one.

I don't want to be like this, I can't fucking help it and it's making me feel disgusting.

>>17826308
Joke's on you, I'm the dorky friend.

>>17826303

Your ex is jelly. Go for a kiss with the vhs girl. It not happening in the first date doesn't mean anything, it might be that she's old fashioned or more romantic

>>17826312
You're not an asshole, you're a pussy.

>want to be left alone.
This was the give away. You crave social interaction but you're afraid of more, so you constantly push away girls when it starts to move past basic social interactions and start again.

>>17826318
I think you're right, that would fit my experience. My best friend/roomate killed himself a few years back and that was trauamtic as hell for me, since then i've lost alot more friends to suicide, accidents and one was murdered. Maybe i'm pussying out because I subconsciously don't want to go through loss anymore. Should I just see a therapist?

>>17826298
>I'd place my bet on her having something going on with her ex, either still liking him or going out with him occasionally. But it shouldn't stop you, it might be the push she needs to go on her way and let go of her ex.
All I know about her and her ex is that it was long distance and he kept calling her for a few days after they broke up. She didn't tell me this personally, I just overheard it a while ago.

Like, we'll talk about our families and what we do outside of work, but we've never talked about previous relationships with eachother. I guess it's a good thing, though, since all of mine have been shit shows.

>even if it's just the same as you treat everyone else
I wouldn't say it's the same, since I try to go out of my way to talk with her when I can. On days shes talkative she'll do the same, but idk.

>
Try to cause a situation where the two of you will be alone for 5 minutes, I don't know what you work is like but kinda ask her out to grab a cup of coffee an hour after lunch, when it's either too soon or too late for everyone else to go after coffee too.
It's at a restaurant, so I guess it depends on how busy it is. We're usually dead in the mornings but I mostly work afternoons and evenings, and she's either morning/afternoon or just night time.

>>17826328
>Should I just see a therapist?
I've yet to meet someone who saw a therapist and came out worse, so I see no reason not to give it a go.

I'm a pedophile. My girlfriend of 5 years has no idea. Should i keep this a secret?

>>17826330

Never talk about exes with girls you're into. It's most likely a ticket straight to the friendzone at this point. If she starts talking about it, try to move on to other subjects as fast as possible. Happened to me and it sucked, lesson learned

She might be noticing how you go out of your way to talk to her then. Something you're doing, on purpose or not, might be drawing her attention.

Maybe ask her to help you with an order and use the walk to or from the table to ask her out quickly (suposing you're both waiters)

18F, in my first long term relationship (2 years), well, if I'm honest, my first relationship, period.

I get on well with my boyfriend etc, but I feel like we're drifting. He's becoming increasingly /pol/, in the sense of 'the jews did everything' white nationalism etc. (thankfully the misogyny hasn't shown up. If it did I'd leave), and his friends are even worse, to the point when they yell out those kind of slogans in public etc. which I find very embarrassing.

I find this kind of mentality lacks a basic civility, as it's founded almost entirely upon conspiracy theories and anger, and also tends to lack in the 'behaving well in public' department.

Aside from the political differences, he also seems to have no ambition, whereas I have a lot, and it's putting us at odds.

I love him, he loves me, but I feel we're going in different directions. What do I do?

>>17826371
Yes.

>>17826371
apply for prison

>>17826381
Don't let your politics get in the way of a good relationship. I'm 24m and I'm essentially a neo-nazi but my girlfriend is a socialist. If you can't work around something as petty as political persuasion then you shouldn't be together. I have, and we've been together 5 years. Relationship is about compromise.

>flirting with girl from work always
>she's giving me the good signals
>says she wants to hangout outside work
>"when can I take you out for dinner?"
>read no reply

Wtf? Why do girls do this

>>17826371
Get the fuck off this website you fucking freak. Seriously go to austin texas, stand in the middle of the street and yell that you're a pedophile, please. Do us all a favor

>>17826393
How about you get off this website, normie. Or go to reddit. Pedophiles have long been a feature of 4chan

>>17826397
As a joke you fucking loser.

>>17826371
>admitting youre a pedo anywhere

Its like you want to be flagged lol. Just keep jerking it to those tight young asses and everyone is happy.

>>17826391
Don't shit where you eat. Also, she's toying with you.

>>17826402
except for the children forced into having those pictures taken, you're a psychopath

>>17826391
>no reply
Stop asking girls out for the first time over text. Always do it in person.

Also don't shit where you eat.

>>17826374
>She might be noticing how you go out of your way to talk to her then. Something you're doing, on purpose or not, might be drawing her attention
Drawing her attention as in "this guy always bothers me, he must be into me, i'm gonna play games with him" or "he seems like a chill guy, maybe i'll talk to him more to see what he's all about" ???

Idk. Every time she ignores me I think I did or said something wrong. Part of me just wants to walk away, the other part is seeing is this as some sort of drug, I guess. On top of that, I can't tell if she's purposely ignoring me as a sign of "stop trying to flirt with me" (but then why would she be nice/flirty the next day?) or she's just trying to watch out for herself? I can see it as both, since I've had nothing but shit relationships so I'm also pretty guarded for the most part.

I'm pretty worried I'm gonna accidentally let my guard down and get hurt.

>Never talk about exes with girls you're into. It's most likely a ticket straight to the friendzone at this point
Yeah, I've had that happen a few times. Even while I'm actually seeing a girl I'm hesitant to bring up past relationships.

>Maybe ask her to help you with an order and use the walk to or from the table to ask her out quickly (suposing you're both waiters)
She's a waitress and I'm a cook/host, so our chances to actually be alone are pretty few and far between unless it's slow. Sometimes if we're both closing we'll get a chance to talk a bit, but there are usually other people closing too.

>>17826400
You're on a Japanese image board dedicated to anime, primarily of little girls. Teens at the oldest. Toddlercon at the youngest. It's not a joke i can assure you.

>>17826390
It's not the differing of politics, it's the lack of civility (and public humiliation). I wouldn't mind if he were right wing, provided he had reasons and it didn't impact his world view to make it so vastly different to mine that we were incompatible anyway.

It's about the way /pol/itics are so completely rage filled and lack basic human decency. I'd feel the same if I found out the person I was dating was a raging tumblr tier SJW. I dislike illogical political positions based on Identity politics of any kind.

>>17826423
He sounds like he takes/pol/ too seriously. The vast majority of shit on that board is just comedy. He's a moron if he takes it any more seriously than that. If he does, leave him.

>>17826415

Drawn in as "this guy is going out of her way to talk to me, maybe he's up to something", while ignoring you is like "...or maybe I should insist on my ex, we still talk, it's not like he hates me". This probably makes her more introspective when it happens, and avoiding you is somehow being "loyal" to her ex in her head

Try to get her number, or slip yours with an order you give her. You're a cook, no matter what you cook I know there's a funny line you can drop on her using it to ask her out for dinner.

The sooner you let your guard down, the sooner you'll find out, and if you're hurt, the sooner you'll heal and move on. The more attached you get to a crush, the more platonic and idealized it becomes, and the more it'll hurt if it doesn't happen

Women,

I know looks aren't everything but, what is the best thing a man who is a 4/10 can do to win you over?

>>17826477
Oral

>>17826485
But how do I get women into the bedroom in the first place?

>>17826477
Honestly if he dresses well, and is intelligent and interesting.
>>17826485
This is true too

Hey /adv/, i'm a guy, i'm 23, i've been in a 3 year relationship that is already too damaged and with no repair.

The problem started when my best friend and i fell in love with each other and i cheated on my gf. It never was with physical intentions although they happened eventually. My friend thought she was going to be the one. So i kept lying at her telling her that i was single no, but, two months ago, she saw me with my gf and she got mad. I cut every contact with her and now.

Now i regret this like i've never done. She was the one, guys. I was too afraid to hurt my GF and i never took a decision. Now my friend is with another man (virtual relationship though) and she doesn't feel nothing for me anymore. I was her super crush for years and i screwed it up. She was perfect, damn.

What can i do to overcome this? I can't stop crying for her everytime and it's all my fault, i know there is nothing i can do to get her back.

Never be afraid to do what your heart wants just because you are afraid.

I learned the lesson...

>>17826462
I guess that makes sense. Also makes sense why I'm probably the one making things worse in the first place.

I guess I'll either have take a chance and try to take things further by asking her out, or just drop it completely. What sucks is I have a feeling she's gonna go full-force on being engaging/talkative with me the second I decide I'm done with this situation....

I just wish I'd stop falling into these situations in the first place. If only things could be as simple as "i like her, she likes me, i'm cool, she's cool, and now we're gonna start dating" but, y'know, life and shit...ugh.

>>17826496
Find someone else. There will be another 'one'.
It sucks, but you shouldn't have cheated, which is a dick move.

>>17826494
Are fitting t-shirts and cargo pants "dressing well"? I think I have the intelligent and interesting part down. I am certainly willing to do oral, but I am not experienced (I'm a virgin).

>>17826502

Yeah, i know it was a horrible thing to do. But i already apologized to both girls and at least i was honest at the end.

I really don't think i will be able to forget about her, not for a long, long time...

Are there any virgins browsing?

Anyway, goes to virgins of both genders: what is the thing you most want to do with your partner when you finally have sex? 'Cumming' is not an answer.

>>17826505
>Are fitting t-shirts and cargo pants "dressing well"?
Not really, no. They'd be okay for casual wear, but if you want to impress a girl? Probably not. But dressing well is very subjective. I would recommend at least investing in some nice shirts, but not ones that are too boring, that's a good baseline.

I personally like suits, but not modern ones (They're too tight, I like 30s/40s era). But that's just me.

Even some of the hipster look can be okay (skinny jeans etc.) provided you don't grow the beard or the attitude.

>>17826485
That's not an answer, by the time he gets to see you naked he's already in there.

>>17826524
Heyo, virgin female--

I always thought kissing on the neck during sex was hot as hell. Very innocuous but I really want to do it.

>>17826515
Look, it seems like an awful situation, and you have my sympathies. But if the friend has moved on, it's a lost cause. I'm really sorry.

Just try to find someone else.

>>17826524
Virgin male here, as in ideal position? I'd love to do doggy style or cowgirl, but I mainly expect missionary

>>17826485
I love giving oral. How do I let women know this?

>>17826498

Don't make too much of it if you're rejected. It's no big deal at all. I know it sounds easy but I know it's not, but just like you said, that's life. There's only one way to find out, and the sooner the better, for better or worse. Either way you'll stop wasting your time with this doubt.

My ex of 6 months (her longest relationship to date, my only relationship to date) wants to give me a "goodbye gift" so that I will remember her, as she claims I will never see her again after we will meet.

Has anyone ever gone through this? Why would anyone do this?

>>17826546
You really shouldn't until you're actually at a point to have sex with them. Trust me, it'll be creepy otherwise.

>>17826537
Not just position, anything sexual.

>>17826534
It's great, kissing his body is great.

>>17826498
>>17826462
One more thing.

I noticed this today and just remembered it. It's basically the reason I posted in the first place but didn't mention it.

Anyway, I said earlier that today was one of the days she was being distant with me. Well, when she was on break/eating, she immediately left once I got in the break area.

What happened was this: she was talking to one of our coworkers back there. I get to the breakroom, smile at everyone and say "hey whats up?" then check my phone (my grandpa called me and I was about to call him back before having a smoke break) and she doesn't say anything.

Her and our coworker basically stopped talking, and then she goes "these chairs are really uncomfortable, I'm gonna go eat in the dining area" (where the guests eat).

So I guess it's safe to say she was actively avoiding me today....I don't know if this adds anything to what was already said, either. Just thought I'd post it.

Why would anyone flip flop between being super friendly and then being a bump on a log?

Maybe I should just drop it? The more I think about this whole situation, the less I can wrap my head around it...It sucks, but it seems like the only girls who are interested me in the first place are messed up. Maybe I should give up.

>>17825782

How exactly did she say "no?"

Like did she just say "I do not want to hang out with you?" or did she say "My mom is in the hospital and visiting hours are almost over?"

Not enough detail in your description to read into her opinion of you based on the "rejection."

Girls, do you find yourself uncomfortable when your male friends talk about women they've been with or that they find hot/pretty?


I have this female friend (we're very close) who seems uncomfortable and shy when I talk about my past or potential relationships.

I usually talk about that shit with my other female friends with no problem, some even try to help me with my potential relationships.

>>17826556

If the coworker was female, they might have been talking about you. Not gonna lie that it's a good sign, there's no way of knowing if they were talking good or bad of you

Wait for a few days and see how she treats you, and work from there. But don't make anything of it before you see any signs, like I said there's no way of knowing so there's no reason to worry about it, it's useless

Got a question for any fem anons.

I'm in the process of making myself date worthy since I didn't give a shit in HS. I'm going t the gym to get /fit/, studing current events, practicing conversation with my family and friends all that good shiz, anything else I should work on? Should I make an effort to understand a lady and alter my persona accordingly?

Women,

Would you ever tell a male you were interested in about your past relationships/current crushes?

I thought a girl was interested in me romantically but she told me about a man she has a crush on which leads me to believe I'm a friend and only a friend to her. Is there any coming back or do I need to move on?

>>17826579
Read some books by people like Virginia Woolf and Jane Austen and the like to help you understand the female psyche more. But really do not act like Mr Darcy.

>>17826573
>If the coworker was female, they might have been talking about you. Not gonna lie that it's a good sign, there's no way of knowing if they were talking good or bad of you
Yeah, it was a girl. I've heard her mention my name in the past, and one of my friends works there too and he said she was talking about me a few days ago. Not really talking about me as in "X is so cool" she just said something I did at work and made a joke about how I press peoples buttons. Idk what that means since the only buttons I press at work are for the timers in the kitchen.

>Wait for a few days and see how she treats you, and work from there. But don't make anything of it before you see any signs, like I said there's no way of knowing so there's no reason to worry about it, it's useless
I'm gonna try to take a step back from all of this and keep my distance without coming off as too standoffish/giving the cold shoulder.

Idk. I'm just switching between feeling good about things, feeling like shit, and then a mixed bag of a bunch of different feelings. I have tomorrow through thursday off because I'm going on holiday to see friends across state, so hopefully this will give me time to just not think about it for a while.

>>17826390

is this a joke

>>17826524
I really want to eat a girl out. Never have.

Are guys with nice smooth legs a no no?

>>17825707
I really like when a guy has a nice ass

>>17826524
Honestly, I haven't even given it thought. It's the cuddling afterwards that interests me.

>>17826596
No, why?

25 and I paint my nails. Usually dark colors or black matte. I "personal preference" and shit, but I just want know what you think it says about me.

>>17826593

Yeah the pressing buttons is ambiguous too. It means you do something specific that triggers a reacrion, but the reaction can be good or bad. No way of knowing, you'd have to ask your friend to keep an ear out for you or give you more details for a better view on the context

Take the holiday to think this through. If you're close to this guy, ask him to keep an ear out for you on those girls. They're very likelly to be more outspoken of you without you around (not that they'll talk about you all the time, just that he has a better chance of catching them of guard and eavesdrop on something)

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>>17826546
>>17826546
Go to town on a pudding cup. They won't be able to control themselves

>>17826535

But how can i know if she really moved on? I know i have no right to get mad for what i did, but i just feel really sad that she forgot me in less than two months.

>>17826609
Me too, I'll probably suck at it, but I really want to munch a carpet, worship her pussy and so on.

>>17826622
Male? You're a faggot.

Female? I do not care one iota.

Ladies:
How how would i go about asking you out, if we only really saw each other in class?

Is this love?

things ended with a girl I really liked because of things outside of my control. Anyways, she moved on but we've stayed good friends. She has a boyfriend now and is getting on with her life. For me, I'm getting on with my life but I'm lonley, but in a way I'm content with my loneliness. Me and her talk sometimes, and although I know we will never be together again, I feel so WARM and happy when she tells me her life is going well. It makes me feel so happy, and even tho I'm not able to make her happy and share it with her. I'm so glad she's happy.

Is this love? And if not, what is it?

>>17826623
I'll ask him to. We've been pretty good friends since early highschool so I'm sure he'd be cool. The only thing is he doesn't really talk to her that much so he'd just have to listen for things rather than be all like "Hey girl thats messing with anons head, do you like anon? I'm asking for a friend...who isn't anon"

>>17826053
is my question not interesting enough to get an answer? please someone can answer this, please do

>>17826702
yes i think it is love, although its a has been type of love

>>17826756

>although its a has been type

What do you mean?

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>>17826381
>I love him, he loves me, but I feel we're going in different directions. What do I do?
So I'm a bit of a /pol/tard myself, albeit on the lolberg side. I think one of the big things would be to stress the fact that there's a time and a place for things. I have lots of hot opinions, but I know it's a bad idea to ruin the night because I can't leave them at home for a while. They say that no one is more zealous than a new convert for a reason, right now he's probably trying to rationalize some conflicting beliefs (there's definitely a lot of garbage that rides on the coattails of decent ideas) and is lashing out like a bit of an idiot I'd wager.

>>17826762
you can't really love her that way anymore so its in the past

>>17826767

Right..

It's just weird. Because even tho I'm lonely as fuck. I feel really happy for her. and it helps my lonliness she's happy

>>17826702
People call it compersion. It's more like compassion. She was important to you. You ended on more or less good terms. Of course you wish the best for her.

>>17826614
sound nice to me

>>17826581
I wouldn't. But she might be trying to make you jealous. I think it's a dumb move because it puts your dynamic to be about chasing, and I care more about companionship. But whatever.

>>17826775

Well, she still "has my heart"..

>>17826805
We're at the very front already. But which is your question?

>>17826806
oh i didn't know that i thought it was on page 2

Women (or men): Do you think single men who work with children are weird?

I work as a babysitter, but I'm 19 years old. I feel like people think it's sort of weird that I'm a guy yet alone a 19yo who babysits kids, yet alone toddlers.

I mean I don't mind, fuck people, but I'm just curious how /adv/ feels.

>>17826702
I'd say it's likely. I'd need more contacts to say for sure, but it sounds like it.
Content with loneliness, I dunno what you mean though. Usually it's like that for me for the first couple months being away from someone I love, but if I go longer than that I'm sooo far from content.

>>17826622
Any nail painting is good imo as it's not those stick-on nails.
Stick-on nails terrify me.

>>17825686
male here
to everyone: how do you notice if someone you don't know is "naturally flirty" vs when someone is being kinda flirtatious to you?
actually, do "naturally flirtatious" people exist at all, or I have been a dumbass all my life and just didn't notice when girls were being flirty to me?

>>17826806
my question is this one>>17826053
can u plz help me with an answer?:much thanks

>>17825686
>>>1782653

Anyone?

>>17826627

Anyone?*

First time on /adv/, guess I'll give it a go

I'm a 21 year old guy who's trying to figure out where my current relationship is heading. Its a bit complicated since the girl I'm with is the first "real" girlfriend I've ever had and the person I lost my virginity to. I'm a Junior in college, and she's a freshmen and we met in one of the most cliche'd moments I could think of when we were reaching for the same slice of pizza at a club meeting (before you ask I weigh 150 and she weighs slight less). We hit it off from there and we (well, her more than me) fell head over heels for each other and within a week we were dating and shortly after that we were in bed. To me, a guy who was worried he'd be a wizard this was all great initially. Only thing is, I'm beginning to wonder if I want to keep this up. It's been about 2 months now and she keeps moving pretty fast in the relationship, for example while she does technically live in a dorm she's basically moved into my room in my off-campus residence and stays there almost all of the time. Also she spends basically every moment that we're not in class/work together with me. This may not sound so bad but for me this was a complete change of pace from how I used to live. While I do like her very much and enjoy her company, I can't help but feel I'm not returning as much affection as she's giving me. It doesn't help that I feel a bit obligated to be in this relationship since as a freshman she's having to deal with a lot of freshman-related shit while fretting about being able to pay for college and stressing about recently losing her job. If she breaks down I'm there for her, giving her a shoulder to cry on and encouraging her and the one time I broke down over unrelated stuff she was there for me too. But I can't help but feel that she's bringing herself too close to me because she's too afraid that I'll let go, when its suffocating me. 1/2

>>17826579
Consuming popular tv shows would give you an easy topic of conversation. Pull in some hobbies that you think your preferred woman would be doing. Like cooking or art or music or whatever.

>>17826053
>>17826824
How old are you two?

>>17826858
im 25 she's 21

>>17826845
She's not overly clingy, she'll let me go out with my buddies if I ask but at the same time I'm not sure how to communicate to her that I'd like a little "me" time so that I don't go bonkers. I feel that I may be overly worrying about this since I feel she'd understand, maybe communication is the root of the problem. Thing is she keeps talking about how she "really wants this to work out" and about possible plans that involve planning for next year or something like that, and I'm not really sure if I'm committed to that yet.

I guess the tl;dr question is, should I continue to try and work things out with her or should I break it off with her because we're not on the same wavelength?

>>17826627
It's not about forgetting. She just met someone that she liked.
You fucked up. Be better next time. You can't get her back. Stop trying. You just have to let yourself go through the grieving stages. You're stuck on bargaining.

>>17826863
What the fuck. Her behavior is not normal. We can't really judge what's going on, because she's a fucking sperg. People don't just sprint away.
She could have been so uncomfortable by you that she needed to get away. She could have been so excited about you that she got nervous and just started running. Who knows! She cray.

>>17826874
ok thanks anyways

>>17826818

>Usually it's like that for me for the first couple months being away from someone I love, but if I go longer than that I'm sooo far from content.

I just don't know how else to describe it. I feel shitty. But I choose it. I don't want to meet new girls. The thing is, I was never "searching" for anything when I met that girl. I never wanted it. It just happened. So, I have absolutely no desire to go meet new girls for anything. So I continue to be lonely

>>17826874
I'd like to think it was actually because she was so excited but i will not know until she calls me

>>17826881
Choosing it doesn't mean you're content.
If you feel shitty and crave her being around that's far from being content.

If you don't want another girl now after her, if that's not just out of being mixed up in other things, then I think it's definitely you love that girl, assuming she wasn't EXTREMELY different from the rest of the girls you interact with.

>>17826818
I think it's an indicator of a good father. I might hesitate with you because I don't really want kids, but that would be easily remedied by you mentioning that you fell into this job and probably wouldn't choose it.
If you want to be a dad, then great! You're putting out good vibes to women who want to be moms. And making crazy bitches who wouldn't trust you around your own child go ahead and fuck off.

>>17826818
You're basically a kid yourself, nothing wrong with this.

>>17826821
That's the issue. There's no for-sure way to know the difference. The best you can do is what other people say about them, which really is just rumors.

>>17826895

See, i 100% accept the fact that things with her are over. I know it. I also know that we'll never be back together. So, I don't think I'm "craving" her anymore. But I do miss her.

But I really don't want anything to do with other girls. Things ended 7 months ago, and I've turned down sex and dates from other girls. Even girls who would have made things very easy, I turned them away. I haven't even hugged a girl since things ended.

>>17826564
Some of my girl friends think that's inappropriate. I have fun helping out guys. Plus it helps me confirm that they aren't interested in me, and I'm not interested in them. People differ in their comfort levels.

>>17826549
I've never heard of anything like this. But most relationships I've seen break up haven't been on the best terms. Sounds like she wants you to think fondly of her when you look back.

>>17826902
aha. so, either way, I'm a dumbass.
thanks.

>>17826303
Why are you still talking to your ex? Particularly a sabotaging still-has-feelings-for-you ex?
I would never kiss on the first date. Definitely not have sex with someone.
The trick to continuing this is to use the word "date" in your request. "I'd like to take you out on another date this weekend. Does Saturday dinner work for you?"

>>17826122
Stalking purposes. Curiosity.

>>17826119
Yep. But I'm also on 4chan and kind of used to that stuff. We also met through 4chan. I'm also into that shit myself.
We're not a really good guess for the general population. We try our best.

>>17826084
Cut contact. Save yourself.

>>17826933
Eh. Being oblivious isn't uncommon nor damnable.

>>17825811
She is in charge of her own life. If she kills herself because you left her, that is her own decision. This really sucks, but you can NOT sacrifice the rest of your life due to her threats. That is called emotional blackmail.
These threats are almost always empty. But if she does, it is NOT your fault. That is her own damn fault.

I suggest asking your therapist on advice on how to do this. This isn't uncommon. My ex threatened the same thing. Guess what? He's still kicking.

I took a bad decision: i lost the one that loved me and chose the wrong person.

Two months later, she is already with someone else and has no interest on me anymore.

I feel devastated and i can't stop thinking about her.

Yesterday i called her and i told her some things (apologizing mostly) but i requested her to be silent, she was, i hung up the phone and today she messaged me: "I hope you have a beautiful day and have luck at work"

My only answer was: "Do you really needed to do that?" Her answer was: "I was only being polite and educated"

After that, she didn't talk to me the rest of the day.

I feel like crap, /adv/. I even dream about her every night, it's so painful to know she forgot about me so easily and now is with someone else. But hey, i deserve it.

>>17825707
>>17825790
I really relate to this part:
>>17825790
>Plus I don't find visual stuff that important. I don't like porn much either, I want to fantasize about smells, touches and noises. When I see a man like your pic related, I don't picture his naked body. I picture him pressing his big hand down on my stomach while I feel his erection against my ass as he's murmuring dirty stuff so I feel his hot breath on my neck and I can tell by his thick voice just how much he's into it.

>>17826900
I mean, technically I did sort of chose the job, as I can quit and get paid waaay more at other places, but I like the job.
Originally I started to help family, and then that spread to other people hiring me, and because I always wanted to be a dad, so I figured why not pseudo-dad?

There's a problem though, from what I've found it seems like no women seem to WANT kids around my age, and older women feel uncomfortable dating someone so much younger, so I feel like I'm in a weird spot.
People who don't want kids know/think they shouldn't date me.
People who want kids barely exist around my age.
People who do want kids who aren't around my age think it'd be weird to date.
What's my move?

>>17826901
I don't see myself quitting, as I like the job and don't need any more money, so unless I move I'll definitely stay doing it as long as I can.
When does it get strange?

>>17826910
It sounds to me like you're just in the position where nothing compares.
Can't really say where to go from there because personally I've never had such an issue, as I've never really had someone I love go out of my life for such a long time, especially someone I liked in that way.
All I could say is I wouldn't compromise, find a girl you want to date instead of just dating to date.

>>17826821
The easiest way is to observe them with others.
Are the flirty to everyone, or just you?

Even still, it's not 100%. Yes, there are people who are more naturally flirty, but also you gotta keep in mind everyone's got their own idea of what "flirty" is. Hell I remember a friend telling me how I was a flirt once, and I was completely blown away by that because I'm one of the least flirty, shy, autistic, sex afraid little shits I know. Why she thought that? In her eyes, any girl who so much as even talks to a member of the opposite sex is flirting. She's one of those "opposite sex cannot ever be just friends" kind of people. I disagree with that, obviously. I'm friendly to lots of people, guys included, but I wouldn't consider myself flirting with guys just by saying hello. So, in the end, it's all gotta be taken with a grain of salt.
Good news is, the 4chan meme of "every gurl is waiting for you to reciprocate her obvious signals so she can turn it around call you a pervert to get Feminism Points™" is well, just a dumb meme.
If you make a subtle move and it turns out your interpretations were wrong, 9 times outta 10, the worst that will happen is she just cuts contact with you. Walk away awkwardly and pretend it never happened. Its not the end of the world. If you feel like a chick is putting on the moves, put a move out back, see how far she'll take it.

>>17826973
Are you the same guy who is already posting in this thread? That's not really what this thread is for. You're kind of blogging.
I'm sorry you feel like shit. These things happen. You're going to have to stop trying to make the feeling stop. You have to just let yourself feel like shit for a while. We can't help you with that.

>>17826818
Nah, then again I'm also an elementary teacher myself so maybe I'm biased. (but the gender stereotypes are in my favor on that one).
You're still plenty young enough for it to not even be questionable, but if you were older, what would even be questionable is why you are still doing a high schooler's job as an adult. You'll need a big boy job at some point dude.

>>17826978
Would you want to date a girl who never wanted kids? What if you fell in love and got married? Don't short yourself on your dreams and values.

>>17826978

>All I could say is I wouldn't compromise, find a girl you want to date instead of just dating to date

the thing is, I'm not searching for anything. I don't know why people keep saying "find". I'm not looking..

and, infact I did meet a girl, a really incredible girl. A girl who i'd deem to be the definitely of "dream girl". Not just because of her looks (although she's very attractive), but we had the same personality, exact same passions and interests. literally like she could be my best friend based off how we fit. But guess what? My emotions aren't there. I couldn't get emotional. she liked me a lot. But for some reason I couldn't do it. So I pushed her away for her own good... literally a "dream girl". And I pushed her away. I'll never meet someone like her again.

And that girl I just described. I met her since things ended with my ex.

>>17826957
She's been a great friend, she's done nothing that deserves ghosting just because I caught feelings. This situation almost makes me wish I were aromantic and asexual, that's how much I value the friendship.

Is there a better way to get over it?

>>17826638
Asking me to hang out after class.
I guess I should ask, have you had any sort of meaningful conversation with her? If no, then how you go about it might be different, which being this late in the semester you might have blown your chance.
If you've never had a real conversation with her, then you're going to want to use the class as your introduction/buffer. Tell her you're wanting to get a study group together for the final or something (protip, inviting others too would actually work in your favor.) If she accepts, get a good footing with her while studying together. Then afterwards, say something like "Hey, this was actually kinda fun despite the studying, you wanna hang out sometime?"
Jumping from being just one of many fucking faces in the class she's never talked to once all semester, to a one on one meeting is too high a hurdle. She'll be more likely to decline. Gotta ease into that shit.

>>17826997
Reduce contact? Prioritize yourself.

>>17826978
If I may put in my 2 cents, are you confusing the women who aren't thinking about having kids RIGHT NOW (aka in their late teens/early 20's) with women who don't want kids period?
Because I'm sorry, as someone in the latter myself, I have NEVER met a like minded person. I have met plenty of the "not now, but someday" types, but never any of the "No, not ever" types. I find it incredibly hard to believe I'm not in the minority on this one.

I think it's highly likely as you get older, you will meet more and more family oriented ladies. You shouldn't be having kids yet anyway, I doubt you're financially ready for them at the least. It's pretty understandable for women your age to not even really be thinking about that right now anyway. Their focus is going to be more on getting a career going, and a stable relationship going, before they start thinking about kids. Thats normal. Give it time, don't count your chickens before they egg mate.

Is there any educational video about eating/fingering the right way? I will be in an arranged marriage and don't want to disappoint the missus.

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>>17827014
So are you mormon or from Saudi Arabia?
Either way I think your god frowns upon anything but strict missionary.

>>17827014
There's a big written tutorial that we used to be posting here a bunch a couple months back. I wish I could find it again.

>>17826988
B-but big-boy jobs are boring and I don't need the extra money :(

>>17826990
I would, if we agreed and enjoyed each others company otherwise.
I think it's sort of unlikely to occur simply because there's only a niche or two out there that people might fit in that would work with me I think regardless of them not wanting kids.
But ever-ever? Unless I had a high-schoolers job forever, I fear I'd need my pseudo-dad fix.
:3

>>17826993
I say it in the sense of find someone as in keep pressing next every time you get asked or you run into a girl if you don't think you're compatible. If you don't work, don't force it, as too many people do in western society.

In regards to that other girl, the only thing that I've had similar is when I disliked who I was, and I felt as if they deserved better or that I simply could not handle being a "person."
If you aren't experiencing that, I have no clue.

>>17827018
The latter

>>17827023
kek Then it doesn't matter, women mean nothing you don't have to please them. They're just baby making machines built to suck your dick whenever you snap your fingers. Why would you want to treat them nicely, you don't have to.

>>17827022
>I would, if we agreed and enjoyed each others company otherwise.
>But ever-ever?
I don't think you understand the concept of "never wants kids"
>pseudo-dad fix
If you're fine with a job like teaching or whatever puts you with kids, sure. Whatever keeps your sperm out of my uterus.

Of course, I'm not going to turn down a guy just because he has a job with kids. I'd probably sneak a test into conversation, something like, "Having those kids must be great! You get to hang out with kids, but then at the end of the day you give them back to their parents and you get to go home alone, right?"

I doubt you're actually losing out on ladies just because you work with kids.

PS People look down on you for using emoticons here. You shouldn't.

>>17827018
>>17827030
Wow, so edgy. I'm really impressed with how well you're learning how to be a 4channer. That really exemplifies who we are. You fit right in. Good work. Now you will finally be accepted.

>>17827022
Lol like I said, it's a fine job for now as a kid. But you won't pay your bills on it without forking over the cash to get a degree to be a *certified* babysitter, aka teacher.
Actually wait, I can barely pay my bills anyway. Fucking America.

I'm just pulling your leg mostly, but for the most part, adults tend to frown upon other adults still doing jobs meant for teenagers. Is it right? Idk, thats up to opinion, but thats the way the world swings. You'll be harder pressed to find a girl who will be cool with you making basically minimum forever. Especially a girl who wants a family.

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>>17827042
I hope the bait was delicious anon because you sure ate a lot of it.

>>17827048
Glad to have you here, anon.

>>17827009
Well I'm saying it's hard to find someone who cares to have kids or likes the idea really at all.
Occasionally I'll meet someone who says they'd like them in ten or fifteen years, but that's even somewhat rare. Never is it after college, or just a "anytime" type of thing where they don't care, but they're in for a ride with whatever life brings at us.

It seems that the only women who are somewhat open to the idea are 25+ and they typically seem a bit uncomfortable dating someone about 6-7years younger (minimum) than them.
I know things will get better as I age in that regard, it just sort of sucks being in limbo till then.

Psh, for years I knew I wanted them, and I've worked to become financially fine to make that a possibility. I have thousands saved up, and while my job doesn't pay a lot (ha babysitting) it pays enough for me to easily save $500-1000/mo.

>>17827014
I mean you can find them but they won't really be helpful...much.
Just talk to your wife (?) to improve your "performance" or simply notice through her behavior. You'll pick it up after a few tries.

>>17827036
Well yeah, I think the whole "wanting kids" would lose me out on more chances than working with them.
I just figure a babysitting job as a guy is already strange to many, but one when you're already an actual adult? That's all.

>>17827043
Actually babysitting can pay more than being a teacher if you teach elementary.
I can get anywhere from $6-10/hr because I like the family to $20-30/hr because the family is rich and likes throwing money at me. If I was selective I could easily get $20+/hr.
I've still considered an early childhood education degree, but I'm not sure if that'd be the best use of my reserves. I've considered taking the dive and being a German for a few years to get it for somewhat free and learn a language though.
Considered.

Oh people definitely do frown upon it, I was just wondering quite when does it get REALLY bad to be doing it.

>>17827062
>I've worked to become financially fine to make that a possibility. I have thousands saved up, and while my job doesn't pay a lot (ha babysitting) it pays enough for me to easily save $500-1000/mo.
>19
brb gonna go cry into my triple digit bank account

I've noticed a lot of the femanons I've talked to over the years have some neet rehabilitation fetish of sorts. Can someone run that one by me because I've never understood why it seems to be so popular with women on the internet.

Any gender
How can I be initiative? The girl I'm interested in and whose interested in me wants to be with me but she says I don't have the initiative as her sister's husbands. We're both pretty young and I think she has her standards too high for being the age we are but at the same time I don't want to tell her that and have it make it seem like I have the intention to be nothing my entire life to her.

>>17827062
Well I mean, some Mcdonalds GM's make more than teachers, depending on what state you're in lmao.
I feel ya on the money front, but you're also looking at security. Sure you could be making bank with a family, but then that family doesn't need you anymore. Say you can't find a replacement family that will pay you nearly as much. The flow of money is going to be hit or miss, whereas if you're making salary or at least at a wage job that is always going to have a steady flow of work you've got better stability.
Thats a lot of my point of view though, because you can have the same issue with any other commission type job where you can make it big some months and have zero work others.
I'm also going off my personal experience in the field. Idk where you live that's that fortunate, but fuck you can hardly even ask for minimum wage for childcare in my parts. Mostly because all the families are too poor to afford it any other way. Friend sits on the side, going rate is about 5 bucks an hour. Markets also kinda saturated. Lots of like, 12 year olds selling themselves really cheap for sitting because they're just looking for a supplement to their allowance rather than trying to make a living (and they're too stupid to know how to market themselves), and surprisingly these families around here don't seem to care much for the quality of their childcare as they are about saving as much money as possible. Tad ironic really, theyd rather leave their kids with a barely older child for a buck an hour than with a certified teacher for 7.

But yeah, there is also the social stigma, which can be taken however anyone wants. People always shit on jobs like that as inferior, forgetting that they want people to watch their little shit kids too lol.
As for when it would be questionable, I'd say once you're post "college age", which would probably be no later than 25. Most people your age will have moved onto better jobs (in whatever aspect, esteem, pay, stability, etc) by then

>>17827115
For starters, why is she comparing you to her sister's husband? That's the first red flag.
However if her complaint is that she's just not seeing you ever going anywhere in life, I can understand that to some degree.
I'm not sure what you or she means by "initiative" though. Like in the aspect of getting a good job and being financially well off/supported, or do you not ever make a move romantically/sexually and always expect her to initiate those gestures? Or something else entirely?

>>17827108
If I had to take a stab at it, low self esteem. So afraid of dying alone they'll take the easy/given route of hooking up with a neet. Or maybe it's to take the pressure off, which can also go hand in hand with insecurity. I'm relatively inexperienced myself sexually, but I've been around a couple dicks in my life at least. I've thought about in the past offering up my services to virgins because then I don't have to feel too self conscious, after all they're usually desperate and I'm at least on a slightly higher rung than them. Can't make fun of my inexperience when they're even more inexperienced.
Or it can be a domination/power trip kind of thing. They like feeling like they're in power. You were just a poor pathetic neet before they graced themselves upon your life. You're nothing without them, you NEED them in your life.
That kind of thing.

>>17827108
I struggle with codependency. I have a bit of a hero complex. My last bf was a NEET and I struggled for years to try to help him. It wasn't healthy.

>>17826998
Wow i like the idea. Granted your right might be too late. Ill try that wensday when i have class with her again.

>>17825686

Men

How many of you would say you've been totally, absolutely ruined by a past relationship? To the point where you would not marry or settle down, even if you met a nice woman?

Let me preface this by saying I'm not interacting with my particular person of interest under the idea that he'll magically become whole again and want to spend his life with me. I honestly am fine with our current arrangement, which leaves me open to finding new people when the time comes.

This guy I'm talking to was engaged not too long ago (>1 yr) but ended the engagement on apparently god awful terms and now says he never, ever wants to be married. Clearly he hasn't thought this forever because it wasn't long ago that he was joyfully inviting people to his wedding. Im respectful of his current feelings towards relationships, I don't even believe marriage is a necessary thing, but I wonder if that's really him having made up his mind or if it's more the hurt talking

guys, have you ever wanted to marry and then became totally against it, or vice versa?

>>17827083
I'm actually about 18 and a half, I rounded up.
I've had to pay all my bills since I was 14-15. Scum down and eat cheap (vegan is cheapest, rice beans potatoes), live in a cheap place, buy no songs or movies (hue), and find some clothing and stick to it, layer to look like you don't have only a few outfits.
I keep costs low, but stay happier than most thanks to working a good job :^)

>>17827124
That's why I stick with a big amount of savings and have a few people I babysit for.
I just live in a college town in Texas, I'd figure it would be even more saturated here desu. You just gotta know some families.

It baffles me how some people will leave their kids with young teens or even 12yo's simply to save a buck or two here or there sometimes.
I'd honestly do this job for as low as $5-8/hr because I already have such a surplus on average, but shit I'd never save a buck or two scooping down to people who are just doing it for a quick buck and are 12 or whatever.

Oh okay, I'd figure it'd be odd below that, I already have gotten shit from people (and even parents at the park) seemingly because I'm a guy. That's the main reason I asked too, as people give me shit all the time because it's not a "mans job" and I've even heard people talking saying it's weird that I'm a guy babysitter.
Like I said though at the start, fuck people, I'll do what I like as long as it's somewhat sensible.

>>17827169
Yeah, timing is kinda key, keep that in mind for the future. Might not be too late though, depending on your majors. There was a dude I was kinda interested in but could never quite pull the trigger and get out of the "school zone" lol. Sure enough though, due to our major's structure I've been in a class with him every semester since. Unfortunately found out he had a long standing gf though lol. Still, point is its possible you'll get another shot if you can't pull it off this semester maybe.

>>17827190
Im a math major and shes a criminal justice major. So i have doubts about see her in classes. But fuck it, heres hoping the worst case is a cool friend

>>17827185
Lol yeah, there's a stigma all around about men in the childcare business. Dumb gender stereotypes and shit, all adult men interested in childcare are obviously creepy weird pedophiles right?
>Texas
That explains why you'd be hesitant towards teaching kek.
My parents are gonna be moving down to Texas in a couple years now since my dad's job is moving offices. I considered going with them since there's basically no other reason for me to stay in this state, jobs not that great and I'm not in that deep yet anyway. Looked into Texas's average teaching salary. Kek, one of the lowest in the nation.

Though I gotta ask, were you just helping your parents with the rent or something, because how in the fuck did you get anyone to rent to you as a teenager? I couldn't even fucking get a hotel room in my state until I was 21. I mean I'd think even Texas would be calling child services on your parents if they kicked you to the curb or something at 14.

>>17827212
Yeah teachers get paid like $20k-30k/year here and have to work year-round in a way.
It's really bad. Literally get more babysitting desu

I was helping my parents (my mother really) with rent, food, and bills yeah. 100% of my expenses and then some were from me.
I can/could find rent for cheap enough though, I mostly stayed to help my mother.

The funny thing is that the stereotype that men are pedophiles and women aren't is wrong, statistics show that 40-65% (so basically 50%) of pedophiles are women and the MAJORITY of sex crimes against children are done by women.
Yet males are the ones that are apparently the pedophiles. It's the same thing with adoption too, which I've looked into for the future, and lets just say it would cost a lot of money.
But who said I'm [spoiler]not a pedophile[/spoiler] anyways, I mean I will tell you I am not creepy or weird though, aside from the whole working as a babysitter which is like I said a little weird for the reasons you said basically. The stereotype that gets me also is that pedophiles apparently are all creepy and weird or even more-so all they want is to have sex.
Not sure if it's projection or just people are ignorant, but whatever, they also think we- they're bad with kids so that works out nicely since the people who know me know I'm so good with kids and they love me too. I mean what kind of kid would love a PEDOPHILE? Gross.
:)

Is it normal for the guy to always make the first move?

I've been talking to this girl for a few months now. I know she's somewhat attracted to me but she's never texted me first, invited me over, or acted like she cares about who i am or what's important to me.

She's super shy. That's what I've been blaming it on. But at this point i want to know if i should cut my losses and leave or stick around a little bit longer.

>>17827301
>few months
>she STILL won't initiate anything
Assuming she was ever interested, you should have given up a long time ago.

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I need a college sweetheart. It's my third year of living at a university, and if I can't find a girlfriend by the end of spring semester, I'm dropping out.
I've asked out ~50 girls just this semester, and I haven't gotten a first date.
Girls, I know you have some sort of code for this kind of stuff. Just give me the cheat sheet, so I can get a gf. I will make it up to women as a whole some day. But I can't work my magic without a little bit of your's.

Back ground: I've had a 9/10 gf in high school for a few years, and I am 9/10 myself. So they aren't rejecting me on looks.

Wow awkward.

>>17827301
It is normal, but I don't think it should be.
If it's been months and you've been around each other more than once or twice I feel like it'd be weird now.

>>17827346
You have to have a similar interest or be with them sharing an activity first unless you're doing the awkward weird "ayyyyy" bit.
It's all about before you ask, not how you ask.

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My ex left me for another man after I cheated on her. I know I fucked up, but I want her back. What can I do to win her back?

I'm already hitting the gym 4 times a week, and learning her native language.

>>17827369
This is fake. Guys don't cheat on girls. Only girls cheat on guys.

>>17827346
>I've asked out ~50 girls just this semester, and I haven't gotten a first date.
And now you're known as that guy who'll hit on every girl on campus. That's not a good thing.

>>17825686
Where/how do I find super skinny girls with ridiculously low self esteem?

>>17827301
Depends. My current gf made the first move on me, but she's also one of the most independent and strong-willed people I've ever met. Although she also turned me down a few months earlier and we continued to friends, so she most definitely knew I had some kind of interest in her. Even with all that, she later told me that she had pussied out of kissing me multiple times before she finally just went for it.

TLDR if she's super shy, she's not going to make the first move. If you've been building a friendship over the course of a few months, she might be interested in you. However if it's one-sided and she's not putting in much effort, most likely not.

>>17827395
There are 10,000 girls on my campus. I doubt any one of these girls even know each other. And if they did, what's the problem? I need to find my girlfriend. I'm getting old, and so is she.
The longer I wait, the less time we have for each other.

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Females and males
>24 y/o male
>havent gotten laid in a few years, used to get laid pretty regularly and one time fucked a hooker. So disgusted with myself and the quality of women I was fucking that I stopped having sex after this
>into younger girls but not super young, like 18-20
>live in a bass-ackward state where 18 is legal
>Couple months ago 17 year old hottie friends w/ my little brother thats in hs with her starts following me on snapchat and twitter, dont pay attention
>day before halloween get a text on snap
>"Anon you are my god"
>I'm drunk and rolling, ignore it
>text her back when im sober to see whatsup
>she tells me she was tripping on acid and all she could think about is how amazing i am and how i'm a legend in the small town i grew up in and how i'm her god
>asks me to take her in public and pretend to be my daughter sometime
>keep talking to her pretty much daily with some exceptions since than, she acts flirty but innocent all the time

Now I'm starting to like this girl. Not the same way I'd like a girl my own age, i like her because shes kinda dumb and innocent and naive and its cute. I'm def not gonna fuck her before she turns 18 and probably not at all honestly and I'm confused on where to go with this.

>My little brother knows we talk and is fucking pissed about it and thinks its weird as fuck, i told him when i was drunk at thanksgiving
>She kept taking screenshots of conversations we were having she thought was funny and uploading them to the internet, I had to make her delete them of instagram
>she also has a cousin thats my age that i've known for years and has wanted to beat my ass for a long time
>if this goes further I don't need shit going around that i'm even talking to this girl or know this girl
>she keeps asking me to hang out, keeps saying that shes in the city i live in now every weekend and asking if she can come hang out at my apartment.

what do?

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Other girls here, have you ever suffered from hair loss?

I'm 27 and have been going through chronic telogen effluvium for a while now due to being a heavy alcoholic for quite some time and I'm afraid it's turning into FPB. I'm beside myself anymore. I used to have gorgeous dark, thick hair that I would constantly get compliments on and now you can see the top of my scalp through my hair. I basically have to give myself a comb-over. The rest of my hair on the sides and somewhat in the back is thin too.

I want to die. It can only keep getting worse.

>>17827428
You deserve it.

>>17827428
Go and see a doctor. My hair's been thinning for a while but it's sorted itself out and is growing back now that I'm on iron supplements. It's still super thin at the ends because it's growing back and is at various lengths, but at least it's growing back.

>>17827440
I tried seeing my family doctor about it at the beginning of the year and he basically said "lol it'll grow back w/e np". I wanted to just believe him after all the shit I read about TE sufferers getting their hair back. Sadly I've since moved across the country and no longer have access to health care at the moment or I would. That will be on my to-do list as soon as possible though.

Where did your hair thin out? All over or just certain areas?

>>17827449
Mine's been all over, really. It's also thinner out near the front around my hairline, but I'm pretty sure that's from having a dry scalp. From what I can tell, there were about two periods of time where I had significant hair loss, about last August, and around March/April this year, and they're both growing back. Definitely go and see a doctor though, at the very least you'll get some answers.

>meet dream girl
>have chemistry, sparks, 9/10
>realize I can't be with her, we're moving apart in few months. never mention this to her
>she starts seeing another friend of mine (lot of drama and lies there)
>realize we won't be moving apart after all

So I want to win her over without being intrusive or seeming jealous, or having her think I only want her know because I can't have her. She and this other guy aren't serious yet, and in fact he describes her as being emotionally distant (which she isn't with me).

So how do I do this?

Is it too weird/creepy to message an ex from two years ago that i never fully got over and just say hey and that i hope she's doing well, and maybe congrats on the baby?

Fembots, how do you like men to approach you or how do start conversation with the opposite sex?

>>17827555
As long as that's it I think it should be fine, but don't try to initiate conversation

Mostly curious about a woman's input but I welcome a man's advice too.

I'm going to go smoke weed with this girl after our final tomorrow. We've known each other for about 2 months now and we get along pretty great. How should I make a move on her?

>>17826619

>MFW a girl I dated in high school said I had a 'J-Lo' booty.

>>17825790

Well you pretty much described me then; I'm 5'11, 175, broad shoulders, prominent collar bones, slender neck, small wrists, dark hair, blue eyes, freckles and I can tan.

My entire life girls have said they've never met anyone who has my look when I ask them to describe them, they always say they can't find the right word(s).

It's funny.

>>17827457
Thanks for your replies. It's always helpful to speak to someone else who's gone through the same bullshit.

One thing that keeps me comforted is that despite the overall thinning, my part lines are still narrow and just have a diffuse around them, whereas with FPB the parts should get noticeably wider and wider.

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>>17827411
help me with this please i could use some advice

how do I know if a girl is not a whore/slut?

>>17827599
No problems, I understand that even talking it through can help. I'm sure yours'll grow back too, but I know it's frustrating having to wait. Mine's only shoulder length and it's still twice as thick at the roots as it is at the ends even though it's been over a year, if yours is even longer it'll be a while for it to grow back, and I really hope yours does too.

>>17825686

>Women

Would you find it creepy if a guy had been completely celibate for two + years. I haven't touched a woman since 2014 due to being really busy getting my career started, and being horrible with women unless I have an emotional connection to them ( aka: my game sucks). In my life time I've had 7ish sexual partners but most were when I was a teenager, I am 25 now.

>>17827647
just lie faggot.

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What denomination of PUA is reasonable for someone new to the dating scene to get into, without gimmicky peacocking or acting like an arrogant thundercunt?

>>17827653
Read the rational male by rollo tomassi, read up on shit tests and "spinning plate theory"

its kinda campy and long but its some pretty abstract concepts that don't involve acting like a twat, the rollo tomassi book and its sequel is generally considered the go-to, alot of the stuff in the intro might seem really obvious but keep reading it.

Definitely worth reading. I read up on this stuff last year and have way better luck now and haven't really changed and still stay true to who I am.

>>17827656
Also, theres some good stuff on /r/theredpill but you really gotta sift, you can find threads about how to generally maintain your appearance and look good naturally and become more alpha naturally, but have fun sifting through the bitchy ass whining and neckbeard mtgow bullshit on that board. If you find something really useful to yourself I recomend saving it, just because I don't think that board is gonna be around forever.

heres an example of a good thread, stuff like this has helped me alot

https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/4yn5k7/how_to_boost_improve_maintain_your_appearance/

>>17825811
Dude, I'm not even diagnosed and I'd leave the fuck out of a relationship the instant someone tries to blackmail me with insanity like that.
It's as bad as cheating to me, you do it you lose me.
You must be the most compassionate asperger I've ever seen.

>>17826496
Damn man, you really fucked up.
Best friends with mutual attraction is wife material.

>>17827369
You won't. Give up and move on.

>>17827486
Dude, you just said you have chemistry, right?
Go see her and talk to her naturally, it'll work way better than trying anything we tell you here.

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On the way back home from the bar yesterday, I found what I first assumed was a couple.
They talked together for a while, then I got involved in the conversation somehow. Apparently they didn't know each other either. When the bus arrived, the guy went his own way and the girl sit next to me while we kept talking pretty loudly about our lifes until I arrived.

My cousin and another one of my friend told me multiple times than they felt wary of looking at men when going outside, of talking to them or interacting with them, that they really didn't want to be bothered.
Was that woman just an exception, or were those two the exception?

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>dating this attention-seeking chick
How do you "give attention" after it's been demanded of you? Whenever this happens I feel like I've been set up between a rock and a hard place and no action is right.

Also, for future reference:
>How do you moderate attention-seeking women?

>>17827763
Just don't bother. If you do, she'll tell you 'it's only because [she] asked you to'.

>>17827735
Depends. Are those two feminists, or do they live in a rough area?
>Was that woman just an exception
Some people are just extroverted, it's not really gendered.

>>17827822
My cousin cares about woman issues, not sure if I ever heard her refer to herself as a feminist since it's kind of a dirty word nowadays. My friend is really small and is currently spending most of her time inside her house playing video games. She apparently really dislikes going outside.

The way my cousin put it made it sound like a gender thing, but I guess it just ain't.

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>>17827411
>>17827620
You know what you have to do

is 13 cm dick good enough, assume I'm 7/10 male.

also what makes a male looks 9 or 10/10?

>>17825686
Does the size matter?

>>17828107
That really depends onpersonal taste. But If you look at models or actors, then generally a 10/10 male has a good jaw line, full hair, V-shaped body and is neither overly muscular nor very skinny or fat.

What kind of things can I talk to normal girls about, when we don't share that many hobbies/interests

To females: is vaginal sex uncomfortable for you, at least at first?

>>17828107
First good face, a pretty one, second, at least 1.80mts of height, third, being /fit/ (not muscular hulk, though).

>>17828107
>>17828160
>>17828129
Are you the same guy asking this?

>>17827647
I wouldn't ask

Male anons: imagine a female friend that you've known for several years and have never been sexually or romantically attracted to.
Neither have they, but suddenly, they fall for you.

Would you want them to let you know about their sudden change of feelings if they made it clear that they understand that your relationship together could never work beyond a platonic level?

Or would you rather she kept it to herself to avoid awkwardness in the friendship despite vocalising being against relationships/FWB types?


(Backstory: I've been keeping these feelings private for several months now.
He has always cracked sexual jokes every now and again, but lately, I haven't been able to handle the playful tones in a platonic mindset, and am considering confessing my thoughts to them so that they can ease up on these pseudo flirtatious comments until my view of them goes back to normal again.
Any similar stories from either gender are appreciated, too.)

>>17828224
I'd suggest going a different route: instead of confessing your feelings, just tell him that the sexual jokes are making you feel kind of uncomfortable.

>>17828224
there's not a single case where a male willfully wants to become friend of a female if he doesn't want to fuck her.

he wants to fuck you.

>>17828225
That's what I'd considered first, however, I'm worried that the sudden change will make him realise that something's up. And he knows that I have no interest in romantic relationships at the moment, so I can't exactly say, "this is making me uncomfortable because I'm dating right now!" or something like that.

>>17828231
That was the motivation for him talking to me in the first place, he has said, but it has since mellowed out. We've known each other for 3 years. He treats me like a male friend-- which I would have no problem with if it wasn't for my current fluctuating feelings for him.

>>17828231
That's a bit too dramatic, but in case of guys there's barely a concept of friendzone, so yes I think you talk to him.

>>17828240
You don't have to have a reason to be uncomfortable. You're over thinking this.

File: i never asked.jpg (57KB, 510x546px) Image search: [Google]

57KB, 510x546px

>>17828326
>You're over thinking this.
Yes, most likely I am.

Regardless, I feel much better being able to write it all down. This is unfamiliar territory to me, so I feel terribly, terribly lost.
But maybe "I feel uncomfortable about this" will only bring me a simple "alright, then, I'll stop."

I'll let him know that it's making me feel uneasy, and do so without spilling my spaghetti.. hopefully.

>>17828160
You mean the first time? Yes, very much so. But that was probably me being nervous/afraid more than the actual intercourse.

>>17828356
you need to understand we males don't get female friends because wow, we want female friends.

we want females friends because betas believe they can friend a female then ask her for sex, or because she has hot female friends.

>no new ATOGA thread
;_;

Women, how can I properly communicate to my girlfriend that I'd prefer her to be ready on time than be late but all dolled up? Preferably without seeming like an asshole. Currently still waiting on her to be ready and I know she's just trying to look her best for me but honestly it matters a lot more to me that she's on time than looking extra nice.

>>17828665
Ask her to get ready much earlier. It's wise to pick out the outfit you're going to wear early in the day rather than leave it last-minute. Same goes with makeup. It might feel almost anti-climatic for her to do her makeup several hours before a date, however, it is a good habit to get into. Always being late isn't.
I have never been in this situation but can understand the frustration; what I would do is try emphasising that it will be less stressful for her to do these things beforehand.

It's not fair on anybody for her to be consistently late. I hope that she can understand that. Have fun on your meet, anon.

Question for anyone really, going to tell someone i want to know her better and would like her number this saturday, i am already starting to get pretty nervous and excited, anything i can do to calm down?

>>17828899
Realize she's a person too and has had similar problems in the past.
Or have a drink.

>>17828954
I will remember that.

M4F
What are some things I can do to make myself more physically attractive to women?

>>17829073
Be attractive.

Sending Christmas cards.
Has the option to attach a picture. And I'm sending it to an ex whom is also like a best friend to me.
> is it weird to attach a picture of us?
I have a boyfriend and I'm not trying to imply anything just want to send a cute card.

>>17829073
Muscles, big dick, money, that's it.

>>17829161
Don't really like overly muscular guys.
I have money myself.
Big dicks hurt me because I'm probably broken in some way.

>>17829204
Well, it's the most overarching list I could make that somehow has correspondence to the reality of most women.