ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

I want to start talking to and maybe ask out a girl that I have a small class with.
Problem is I already did the same with another girl in the same class and got rejected which was a little embarrassing.
Do you think it'd make the next girl feel like a second choice or find me less attractive?
Its been a month or so and me and the first gal are just friends who sit together and talk during class.

>>17822714
Gtfo with this shit

>>17822723
Why was the first girl rejection public? How does the second girl know?

>>17822754
>>17822754
I asked her out in class casually and she made a big deal out of being polite about it and not hurting my feelings and all that shit which was kind of embarrassing and kind of autistic on her part considering she could have just said "No thanks".

>>17822772

Lesson learned: avoid asking girls out in public like this, specially since you seem young and you never now how they'll react to it.

Start talking to the other girl casually and if you get along well in the first week, ask her out for dinner or something. Don't say out lout that it's a date, saying so might scare her into feeling obliged to kiss you when you go out.

It's no big deal imo, if she mentions the first girl lie your ass of, say you always found her more pretty but was scared to ask, or that you didn't want to ask her out before knowing her. Just don't use both unless you're forced to, it'll look like your lying even if you're not.

This sounds like trolling but I'm serious. How do I stop myself from going r9k "bitches qnd whores"? My experiences with women are becoming increasingly negative. I keep dating, sleeping with, and just being around cliche horrible women. I think a big part of it is that I grew up being a romantic and all that, but now I honestly kinda hate women entirely. It's not one experience that ruined it, it's tons. Tons of experiences that just make me kinda hate every woman in my life, and those I haven't met yet.

Girls, what do you feel when you come across (online and IRL) Britney and Stacey Thundercunt? Do you get jelly because they have 200 dicks behind them? Do you talk shit to them?

>>17822838
If you are serious, you get off 4chan and you live in the real world. 4chan is a toxic cesspit and an echo chamber for these thoughts you want to get rid of.

Guys: how important it is for you that a girl has good looks? Consider a girl with a cool personality but meh looks

>>17822844
I'm nice to them because I'm a decent human being and not one who is horrible to someone without good reason, but we'd probably be too different to be actual friends.

>>17822847
>>17822838
Definitely get off 4chan. It's mostly an echo chamber that will reflect all of your worst feelings about women. It sucks that you've got unlucky with horrible women so far, but don't forget that a lot of women will have had exactly the same chain of horrible men - it goes both ways. There are a lot of horrible people in general.

>>17822844
>Britney and Stacey Thundercunt
I have no idea what this question is about.

>>17822862
I believe Stacey is the female equivalent of Chad Thundercock. No idea who Britney is supposed to be, though I recall seeing one of those memes about how everyone knows a bitch called Britney, so maybe it's a reference to that?

>>17822848

Depends on how "meh" she is. Anything below 6/10 is not worth bothering in the long run. Gotta keep in mind that relationships and time will screw up on looks bad.

>>17822865
Bah, I'm getting too old to keep up with the memes...

>>17822849
>>17822848
Depends entirely on the guy.
I wouldn't give a shit as long as she isn't a landwhale but I know guys who will reject girls because their ass isn't big enough. Dead serious.

>>17822848
If the guy is looking for a relationship personality matters a great deal, but you still need to be presentable.

Few guys are going to want to be with someone that they would be ashamed to introduce to the other people in their lives.

>>17822867
Short boyish hair, big facial features, not really feminine face/body. Not "ugly" at all but still meh and not really feminine in general.

>>17822848
Well, I am not good looking, so I don't have much choice. If for a serious relationship, a good personality is always important. Would you consider getting nice medium tits if your bf offered to you?

>>17822849
How can you be so nice? Are you a SJW?

>>17822862
How can you be on 4chan and not know about Stacey?
Stacey is the dumb popular girl, you know the type.

>>17822848
If she's not fat and looks feminine enough I'm fine with it, the rest is talking and personality.

>>17822883
>How can you be so nice? Are you a SJW?
Did you not read past "I'm nice to them"? I know you're used to people being shit to each other for the sake of it on 4chan, but try living in the real world for a bit.

>>17822844
I don't care.
I am not in high school, I have a fulfilling life and I don't care about someone being popular.

>>17822883
I'm just not hip and down with the 4chan, apologies. Popular and dumb girls tend to only be a problem while you're in school, when you get older they tend to be lovely people who you just have very little in common with. My general attitude is to wish them well and happiness even if that's something different from my happiness.

As for while you're in school, I wish I had a way of solving bullying. Sadly I don't.

Guys, what do you feel when you come across (online and IRL) Chad Thundercock? Do you get jelly because they have 200 pussies behind them? Do you talk shit to them?

>>17822880
Do you dislike being feminine? Why?

>>17822888
The real world is full of shitty people, what are you saying?

>>17822880

Big facial features like what? I've seen girls with big noses that are gorgeous because the rest makes up for it.

Body is the same. A small ass and tits go along well with a thin and small frame, but if you look like a truck driver I have bad news for you

Maybe post a body pic with the head cut out?

>>17822895
I seriously didn't expect such answers.
[Faith in humanity restored a little]

>>17822896
I feel jelly. :(
I'm 29.

>>17822896
>come across (online and IRL) Chad Thundercock?

As soon as I meet the guy, I'll let you know he is pretty famous.

If you mean being jealous of men that have better game than me... what do I care? Seriously. There are richer people, more famous people, etc. etc. You can leave being jealous of everybody.

So I've been a kik group with locals from my area. We've met up for a few meals, some of us. But we get along with each other greatly.

One night after my gf and I got done having sex, I was just taking random pics, and sent a few of the mostly nude ones into the group.
Then proceeded to add her to it.

She has no problem with posting on "titty Tuesday" or any of the other stupid things we do.
Should I have felt disrespected, like shit, and those typical feelings? or let her have fun and get fed by the praise of the other people, since I exposed her in the first place?

>>17822921
I honestly can't understand how your story was followed by the idea that you should feel disrespected rather than your girlfriend. For the sake of my own sanity, I hope you're joking.

>>17822921

So you "accidentally" sent several pictures to the group? Yeah... I believe you...

(I don't believe you really.)

>>17822929
Well because I told her it bothers me when she just spams half nude pictures, acts flirty and shit.

Pretty much over it. I've just been wanting some different opinion.

>>17822933
Yeah we had been drinking, guess I just kinda wanted to "show her off"

>>17822937
>guess I just kinda wanted to "show her off"

Then she was disrespected, not you. Be grateful she is so dumb / has so low self-esteem that she didn't dump your ass.

You two deserve each other. In a bad way. Cause you are both assholes.

>>17822937
You show her body off, and now doesn't like she does the same?

You brought that to yourself faggot. At the very least she's doing it because she thinks you like it, and that's if you're lucky. Most likely she's a total slut and used this as a chance to come out since apparently you'd accept it.

If you don't, break up, this is beyond fixing

>>17822945
She hasnt done it in a couple weeks. I didn't make that big of a deal about it, but still acknowledged that I was in the wrong in the first place.

We post to 4chan and have an xvideos page, it was different cause I know these people irl. Thanks for your opinions

>>17822955

If you're ok with strangers it shouldn't be a big deal for the two of you then. Just tell her it wasn't cool doing that to people you know and I think she might agree. It's very different doing that anonymously and not, but it's a line that you'll be able to cross back.

>>17822968
Thank you. Appreciate your feedback anonymous.

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what does it mean when a girl texts you good morning"? I don't have a lot of experience with texting. I know it means girls like you but does it mean they're genuinely into you? Or do they do it with most guys? The better question is does it mean I'm in?

>>17822977
>The better question is does it mean I'm in?

In what? There's no step by step chart. It just means this particular girl was thinking of you that morning. Maybe she likes you, maybe she wants a favor. Maybe something else entirely.

You really need to observe more to decide if she likes you.

>>17822984
>You really need to observe more to decide if she likes you
so it's not a definite good sign? also what if I respond really late because I slept in?

>>17822998
>so it's not a definite good sign?

Not really. You don't even know why she wrote. That message in itself means nothing.

Went out with my friends and a group of Girls. I was interested in one girl and we were chatting lots when we were at the club.
When we left I asked a common girlfriend of us(aka her friend and a girl i know)if that girl has bf. She said no.
Next day they told me to go out with her, the girl i liked and another boy.

Was that probably a Sign that she told her im interested? And a positive one?

On a second date, what do you talk about considering if you've explored so much on the first one?

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>>17822714
ok girls, I need your input

> start dating this girl
> she's great
> has some problems but its nothing that can't be dealt with
> we've been officially dating for like a week
> last night I was over at her apartment and she puts a key on my lap
> its a key to her apartment
> before my mind can process she says "dont freak out its just so you can lock the door on your way out"
> she had to leave for work early and I was gonna sleep in

do you think that this has some deeper meaning?

is it a big deal?

am I overthinking this?

>>17823126
>>do you think that this has some deeper meaning?
No

>>am I overthinking this?
Yes

Ladies, when you are "on and off" with a dude, what does that really mean?

Ladies, would you feel bad if you didn't manage to get the guy off during sex?

>>17823164
Cock carousel.

>>17823171
Of course. But, due to the different anatomy structures, that's pretty uncommon with a regular partner. Guys are lucky- generally if you rub a dick long enough, you will probably orgasm. They don't have to deal with the whole 'emotions connecting to sex' bullshit.

>>17823172
Damn.

>>17823083
Girls are very roundabout in their communication. If a friend told you to ask her out, then go for it, unless said friend is a known manipulative bitch.

>>17822943
Agreed.

>Ask a pretty girl in my class to study
>Get her number
>Study, goes decently
>We don't really talk much otherwise
>Eventually find out she has a boyfriend
>Don't talk to her much after, don't want to annoy her
>Now I get nervous as fuck when thinking about starting up a conversation even though I'd rather be friends
What the fuck is wrong with me

>>17823261
You liked a girl, then were disappointed. It's natural to be a bit nervous.
Try to find someone else and move on, and conversation will become more natural.

Girls, how do you get used to the fact that there is ALWAYS many guys masturbating to you?

>>17823171
Even professionals get a little disappointed, bro. If that's your problem, seek treatment. If it only happens rarely, it is no big deal.

>>17823261
You're afraid of getting killed by jelly bf.

>>17823271
I love knowing a guy is wanking over me. I love teasing him to ensure he does.

>>17823277
But what about guys you don't know (or don't know well)? There are many guys who saw you when you were out and about and are masturbating to you right now. Is this good or bad? How do you feel?

As a penis, I will never know >that feel.

Question for my bros, is it normal for your dick to start shrinking around 25 years old? I know I'm technically "out of my prime" now, but this is a bit sudden.

>>17823270
>>17823271
That brings me to my next point, actually. But as a side note, my roommate made out with this one girl who is dating someone on the football team, so I'm going to die eventually. In his defense, he found out afterwards. Either way, the other point.

>Meet pretty girl in a make-up lab a month or two ago
>At the time was interested in the girl from >>17823261 but didn't have the balls to ask her out, end up doing the same thing with lab girl with minimal effort for some reason
>We start talking, become relatively decent friends
>Drunk text each other on occasion, usually incomprehensible garbage because we're both alcoholics
>Get trashed last night with friends
>Fall asleep at like 4
>Have a dream where I text her to go do something, she says "like a date?" and I'm like "Not what I meant but yeah sure"
>She says something about past relationships being bad, somehow nudes were sent (I have no fucking idea why)
>End up being really happy I have a girlfriend, but immediately after think that my lack of experience will upset her and I'm not good enough, so I want to break up
>Wake up
>Literally tfw no gf
>Don't understand the dream at all but also not hungover so that's a plus
What does any of this even mean and why haven't I killed myself yet

>>17823306
Shrinking? Wtf? I feel my libido is diminishing gradually (I'm 29), but my penis seems the same as always.

>>17822848
As long as she looks good to me, I don't care what anyone else thinks.

>>17823313
Well, ask her out then. Rejection can knock you around a bit. Best to not pin too much on it, but try to at least ask her.

>>17823294
I don't post anything worth masturbating over, except to my bf (and even then, nothing completely nude, usually with underwear etc. I'm a little paranoid about that kind of thing). So I don't believe they do.

>>17823271
>Even professionals get a little disappointed, bro. If that's your problem, seek treatment. If it only happens rarely, it is no big deal.
To be totally honest, it was actually my first time. I suspect years of fapping made me incredibly tolerant.

>>17823337
The thing is, I don't want to lose her as a friend for when I do get rejected

>>17823426
>relatively decent friends
If it were best friends, I'd advise otherwise. But if you're going to continue a semi serious friendship while liking her as more than a friend, it's going to cause you a lot of pain.

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Girls

what porn did you like/what did you fantasize about when you where really young (12-16)?

what porn do you like/what do you fantasize about today?

I want to ask a girl if they realise how much easier it can be being a woman than man. Like, you could get moseley men without trying because ,en are horny idiots. You could get laid without trying. Do you realise this?

>>17823449
Okay, what of it? What am I supposed to do about it?

>>17823436
I don't even think I like her like that though. I mean at one point I considered her a "backup" to the girl who has a boyfriend, but there hasn't been anything that made me think I actually like her, besides that weird ass dream. I don't know if it'd work out anyway, she seems like the type of girl to just be into hookups and I'm way too much of an ugly loser to stand a chance.

>>17823439
When I was 14 I was Weeaboo trash and liked Hentai.
Then and now, I like BDSM, and I am bi and like lesbian stuff too (and lesbian dom is probably my favourite).
Additionally I like DP and gangbangs, but there's not much within the 'relatively normal' sphere that I haven't watched at least once, although the 'for women' stuff has never, ever gotten me aroused. If I wanted that I'd read a book by Anais Nin.

>>17823456
Then leave it as it is. Perhaps look outside your classes for a gf. Follow your hobbies and whatnot.

>>17823449

Of course I know this. But I also find horny idiots disgusting, so it's a no-win situation.

>>17823449
Yes, I do. I also think there are challenges that women face, like still being laid off for having children etc. Basically the modern world isn't great for anyone except the 1%.

Also, this is in the west. I'm fairly sure its easier to be a man in other places.

>>17823461
At this point, the only non-school non-work thing I do is drink. I guess my next step would be meeting girls at parties. How can I go about that without fucking it up?

>>17823472
Don't get too drunk, and thus embarrass yourself. Also, maybe at least try to develop a hobby. Reading or films or video games etc. You say you're at school or University? There should be clubs and stuff.

Girls, how do I introduce myself online to a girl in the least creepy possible way when I have no mutual friend with her (she's in the same university but that's it) and I don't want her to find out I'm actually already stalked her profile for a while. Let's say she has artist page in FB and I could say I'm a fan and actually have similar interrst. I'm just not sure how to choose the words.

To anyone really, I've been speaking to this girl who i got with one time, then texted her which she then just didnt respond at all. A few weeks later she calls me and asks me out basically then cancels the date 2 hours beforehand (this was on monday). Is this some sort of game where I have to pretend to not care or is she just not interested? I just wanna know if i should move on or not.

>>17823439
Well the thing is, I've always been into BDSMish stuff, even when I was little (like younger than 12). I'm a 90s kid, and I used watch music videos all the time. For my BDSM kink I basically blame the music video 'Human Nature' of Madonna. I've read somewhere that your first sexual arousal is what becomes your fetish, so that completes the puzzle for me. And I guess seeing that could have gone two ways, but I ended up identifying with the girl that got tight up, rather than Madonna. Hence you can guess which I am in the sheets. It never really changed a lot for me. However, I never watch porn of any kind before the age of 20 btw. I just had lewd fantasies in my head. Nowadays I even don't watch it that often, unless I really need that extra visual stimulation.

Btw just a side note on the BDSM thing. I like it 50 shades of grey style, where the focus is pretty much on the woman being pleasured. I saw some of the BDSM stuff on another board with extreme stuff, but it was not appealing at all, because there wasn't anything that looked pleasing. Just painful in the annoying way of painful. Except for the one video of a tight up woman getting her clit stimulated by a vibrator. Now that is the BDSM I dig.

I haven't really kept in much contact with my friends circle due to being on night shift mostly. One girl who came into the group, whom I liked before, is now in a relationship with a guy who is previously divorced. Didn't think much of it until one of my buddies said he's a "real nice guy" more than once. My friend is also owned by his wife whom I call out on bullshit behavior than he has the balls to do.

What's the chances that this new guy is just putting on a show for the friends group?

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22/F poor fag
I pay rent, food all my bills pretty much under my mom's roof. I don't get any kind of help. I manage to make decent money.
I'm use to dating guys +5 years than I.
Currently dating someone my age and I just feel he's less committed or and is a bit of a cuck. 1.5 years of dating
> doesn't really take me on dates but understanding since no job. Maybe a date every 4 months.
I still manage to treat him on dates and with little gift surprises
> his parents pay for all his things
> he's very cheap with things he buys.
Which I suppose that's not bad but it reminds me of Mr.Krabs.
I guess I'm use to dating more alpha type of guys.
>Is this what dating someone my age is like? Not feeling like a priority or not talking about the future or assuming he's gonna go move on and be on his own..

He's in college so I'm sure he will probably have a brighter future than mine desu. Which of course is my fault but I don't want to put in all this effort of cooking for him and always going out of my way while I feel he wouldn't do the same for me. I thought maybe with time but

>>17823516
Sure message her. If she isn't responding often probably saw your ugly picture or ever hear of stranger danger

>>17823532
Move on

>>17823164
I'm trying to decide if I really want to be with you.. I'm weighing out the pros and cons
>>17823172
Sounds like a slut response or a male response

So after two months of back and forth with this girl, she came to the conclusion that she isn't in a good part in her life to be in a relationship. Thing is, when I tried to split, she told me that she didn't want me to say goodbye and that she didn't want me to stop talking to her. I think shes cool enough to try to be friends, but the thing is, she makes no effort to talk to me. I'm always the one to say "good morning", she drops conversations, and i'll be the one saying goodnight after she goes 8 hours without talking to me in an endless cycle of trying to conversate with her.

My question is, whats the deal? What do I do? I feel like I could just stop texting her altogether, and she wouldn't notice or care.

My wife is lactating and i want to suck her tits.


How do i go on about this without it being awkward?

>>17823733
It's an honest response.

>>17823737
Do just that. Let her initiate, and when she doesn't, you'll have your answer.

>>17823751
She's your wife, do whatever you want. Unless you're the bitch in the relationship, then you better ask for permission

>>17823752
Guess I'm just not that type of girl

>>17823712
Match his effort level. Or, break it off and become better

>>17823532
Don't even bother. Delete number from phone

>>17823755
Yeah, you're right. Its bizarre though, because after we fought about the whole thing for a bit and we both sort of came to the conclusions that we should try to be friends, she told me " Feel free to text me WHENEVER. I probably won't because I'll feel like I'm getting in your way." It just feels weird for me to be like "Good morning!", with her replying 3 hours later, with about an hour of actual conversation, and then I send the last text. It stays that way til the day is over, and I tell her something like "hope you had a fun day, goodnight", and the cycle repeats itself. Its been that way for like 4 days. It makes me feel needy and like I'm the only one who cares.

>>17823516
No don't do that, definitely creepy.

>>17823712
He's a broke student, what are you even hoping for? Of course he's going to be cheap. This doesn't read as being "alpha" or not to me, but the fact you're used to dating guys who are already ahead of you in life.

>>17823757

I mean, i do suck her tits once in a while when we are having sex, but now that she is lactating i really want to taste her milk and i'm afraid that i'll be awkward for her.

Do not women find it weird if a grown ass man wants to suck milk out of their tits?

>>17823770
Whatever stop thinking about why or what. If she wants to reach out she can otherwise she doesn't exist to you anymore

>>17823779
Yeah it is awkward, so what. Do it if you want and she'll kick you away if she doesn't like it. Breast milk doesn't even taste that great to begin with

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>Finally dating a girl after a few drunken encounters months ago (no sex).
>First date goes very well, she likes making out, touching etc.
>Second date is kinda boring but we still get close.

But she never initiates contact. It's doing my head in. She hasn't flaked on me and is always super keen to meet, 98% of the time fast response and tries to keep a text convo alive. However we will go a week without speaking, and only text to arrange a date. She is pretty talkative on the dates, and I know for a fact that she is messaging friends of mine (only friends) regularly.

We're supposed to meet this week, and I think I'm going to call instead of message to arrange it. I'm not sure if I should continue seeing her if the whole texting thing is a sign that she's not that interested.

Why would she be like this? What should I do?

Are there any particularly submissive girls ITT? I want to know what kind of commands you like to hear and follow. What do you think is the best way of pleasing your Dom partner?

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Girls

I have been on a date with this girl 3 times now, what we have done have basically been "hanging out", went to see a movie, going out eating and played some vidya games at my place. However I have never even tried to kiss her, the most I have done is giving hug every time we met.

Is this bad? These are my first dates ever, I have never had a gf before and I'm a virgin. I have no idea on how to kiss at all, I have never done it, not even on the cheeks or something and I'm too nervous to just "try". I feel like I'm just gonna fail, look retarded and leave her face or mouth filled with saliva.

Also I'm worried that she will get tired of me because I'm not making a move, and she expects me to do it because that's what girls expect of guys.

However she agreed to meet again next week but I feel like this is just a matter of time. Would you stop to date a guy if he dosent initiates?

>>17823816
Call, ask how her day was, set something up for the weekend, end call. Save everything to chat about when together. Have a fucking plan about what you're going to do. If she says no and doesn't offer to reschedule then it's a no go, wasting your time

>>17823865
Think he's shy, a fag, or some little bitch that I will own in the relationship. Lock eyes with her and go in for the kiss. If she deflects, and gives you the cheek, save yourself with a standard euro cheek to cheek kiss, say bye and walk away from that bullshit forever. If she doesn't, pull away, make more eye contact, give her a smirk and say see you soon

>>17823875
smirks are so fucking cringy, jesus.

>smirk
>nothin' personal, kid.

>>17823449
But I don't want to get laid with men I don't find attractive

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Does quirky, weird, silly openers ever work?

I always fucking do this. If I ever get matched with a girl that is like above the league of the typical level of girls I match with then I get all excited and deviate from my standard game of just saying 'Hey, wanna meet up?' or just something direct, to the point and simple. I always try to be unique and lel so quirky and randum because I think that's being myself but it never gets me any responses. Or does it really matter what I say and is it just because the girl is popular and probably has dozen other guys to choose from?

>>17823737
Why are you still sending her good morning/good night texts? Do you do that to all your friends?

>>17823171
My boyfriend often doesn't cum. I doubt I'm doing anything drastically wrong. I do wish that I knew how to push his buttons just the right way. I feel a little bad that he doesn't get to cum, since that feels good and otherwise he's left kind of blueballed.
I don't blame myself and I know it's probably him psyching himself out or something. I know that it's not because I'm too ugly or something dumb like that.
I wish I could talk to him about it, but I don't know how I would bring it up.

>>17823865
Are you sure they're dates?

>>17823913
Give an example of one of your "quirky" openers.

>>17823916
I'm just so used to it, I've already told myself I wouldn't anymore. Its just become second nature with her. So many little things that I've changed about myself over the past few months were second nature. Its also been me just trying to be nice to her. I still want to be kind and sweet to her.

>>17823875
I just can't do it, I worry the most that she will not think its ok and try to push me away and never wanna see me again.

Other than that I have no idea on how to kiss, it looks like such a complex thing that needs training to do it wrong free.

>>17823947
I guess if 2 people of the opposite gender meet each other and do stuff with each other I would call it a date, I also asked for specifically a "date" the first time.

>>17823937
Be direct. Do you always come when you have sex? Probably not. It's no different with men, sometimes my girlfriend gives me a super enthusiastic blowjob but I'm just too zoned out or tired to reach orgasm.

>>17823958
>I guess if 2 people of the opposite gender meet each other and do stuff with each other I would call it a date
...no.

>it looks like such a complex thing that needs training to do it wrong free.
Just ask if you can kiss her and give her a chaste kiss. It sounds like you guys are moving at a glacial pace so you probably won't be playing tonsil hockey, don't worry about it.

>>17823947

While you're out looking for Pokemons I was in your fridge and took all of your avocadooooos. Reply with your # or they are going into the guacamole

>>17823989
I admit I think this is cute. What kind of girls are you going for with this type of line? Just the "nerdy" types? I think normie girls are more receptive to the traditional openers.

How good is your profile? You're right in that girls have a lot more choice than guys do, I'd say 5:1 at least. You need to make sure you're making a good first impression.

hey this is off topic but i didnt want to make a thread about this... i've seen people on this board talking about bdsm websites and was wondering which website people have had most success with

>>17822848
you have to be passable at least.
The least you could do is aim for a good body by working out.

Guys/

Why do you always take any response short of a definite "Yes" as rejection?

>>17823439
Never liked video porn.

>>17824080
Because words mean shit. And we use vocabulary as a tool to express our thoughts.

Maybe is just about as good as no.

>>17824088
But there still a level between a maybe and a definite yes.

Guys-
How much makeup is too much, and how much is too little? It may seem trivial, but I've heard many different things. The main consensus is 'I like natural etc' but when you don't do makeup men don't really look at you as much.
Just curious.

>>17822896
I worked with someone like that, I honestly didn't consider him someone trustworthy and I would just our interactions to a professional level.
If something I would say is decremental for the women I knew he had slept with because I would value them less for their lack of choice.

>>17824114
There is no such thing as too little to me. Too much is when you have fake lashes, mascara, blushy cheeks, really red lipstick. Basically looking like a box of crayons.

>>17824114
Honestly every guy opinion is different. Just do what you want. Unless you're trying to get a certain males attention then ask him. The way you do yourself up will attract the right person for you.

How inappropriate is it to try to ask the opposite sex out on a date over social media? I only ask because I never see this person out in public and have no other clue of how to do it.

>>17824114
this is subjective
i prefer very little to no makeup
preferences of others may vary

>>17824114
obv its different for every guy but personally
the "too much" limit is easy to approach, and i'd rather no make up than too much.

that said though, i wouldn't even bother going after the kinds of girls that would have "too much" make up on anyway - i'm just not as attracted to them. it's like not being attracted to guys that only wear bike shorts.

but if i somehow found that you were amazing, like your personality was perfect and we get along really well, i would not really care what you do with your make up.

>>17822880
I'd smash.

To elaborate on that, the existence of one person who finds those descriptors appealing equates to there being, at the very least, a niche interested in it.

That said, that's an acceptable/desired physical trait which, winding back to your original question, means yes. Physical appearance is VERY important even if a good personality is in play.

Humans are visual creatures. It is what it is.

Women: I'm getting really fucking mixed signals and i have no idea what's going on

>have female friend I've developed feelings for
>btw I'm diagnosed autist
>already rejected, maybe being friends is best
>she has been with about 5 or so men, I'm never gf, have no idea how to read signs
>she's 19 I'm 21
>she and i use chemical substance, and end up cuddling for like two hours
>she gives me squeeze-y hugs now and is far more touchy with me
>yet she always tells me about guy x
>how great he is, hot, a good lover etc etc
>she is laying her head on me and is showing me pictures and makes me look at pictures of them together
>feel confusion, rage, and a little sadness
Its like she's purposefully trying to toy with my affection towards her.

What does this mean?

>>17824080
if you answer a question where a definite yes/no answer would be an appropriate answer with a long sentence, we will take it pretty much as a rejection.
I know is an ironic answer.

>>17824091
Why are girls always so reluctant to give definite responses?

Girls: What's a good text you'd want to hear after you dumped a guy for being possessive in a relationship? She dumped me 2 days ago and I'd still like to remain friends because we got along really well as friends before we rushed a relationship that failed fast. Also because we have friends together.

>>17824091
Yes means we in, bois.

Maybe/Sort of/I'll think about it implies a wait time at best and having to work more for it at worst. Why must we waste our time with that when we can keep searching out?

>>17824172
I'm just asking because I saw one guy posting asking about the answers her got, which was "We can always give it a shot!"

Which I would personally would use as a Yes, with a TBD date. But most guys see it as a rejection

>>17824091
Maybe means "ask again under different circumstances", which takes any sort of responsibilities out of your hands.
That's a really shitty thing to do, specially if the other party had to man up to ask you the question in the first place.

>>17824158
Well, that's comforting. Since I can't even do a full face of makeup. I can do like, minimal eye makeup and eyeliner and some lipstick, but that's it (obv not together).

>>17824048
go to >>>/soc/ , I'm pretty sure there is a BDSM thread up at all times that could help you with this things.

>>17824174
Give it much more than two days. If she thought you were possessive (definitely something you should work on) then texting something so soon afterwards would just be seen at worst as more possessiveness and at worst as creepiness.

Give it at least a couple of weeks, and just ask if she wants to grab a coffee or something. Far better to talk it out once you've both calmed down and to do it face to face.

Is there a difference between hanging out and going on a date?

My two female friends told me to not ask this girl out on a date yet but instead hang out. I have no idea what the difference is. Maybe its because the semester is almost over.

>>17824181
It can also mean "You're creeping me out and I want to get you to go away", in the same vein as false numbers. Good luck figuring out which guys.

>>17824114
honestly I can tell the difference.

I would say too much is when you have to spend more than a couple of minutes in your make up.. but again I don't wear make up and how long it would actually take to do it properly.

Girls

What's a "green flag" that you like in a guy? For example a green flag for me in a girl is if she has a good relationship with her family, what's a green flag for a guy in your opinion?

>>17824208
Hanging out is just hanging out. You don't date your bros, you hang out with them. Same deal.

>>17824208
Date implies romance, hanging out is just friendship.
I guess you don't really know this girl too well and she doesn't know you either.
I would say make your intentions clear and don't follow women advices in this things.

>>17824213
Family is a big one. Honestly, a good relationship with your mother is important, because the mother/son dynamic is psychologically the first practice at interactions with the opposite sex (ditto with the father/daughter dynamic).

For me personally a green flag is if they've actually read a book in the past year, but that's because I'm /lit/ trash and have a reading superiority complex.

Girls,
if a guy that you had sex with cum too fast (least than a minute), what would be your reaction?

>>17824208
Unless you're a teenager,
>>17824222
Is pretty spot on.

>>17824226
I'd politely ask the guy to go down on me, but I wouldn't get upset. Maybe a little disappointed, but I'd hide it. It's not nice to make a guy feel insecure.

>>17824222
Well we are in the same organization and talk a decent amount when we see another, but I don't get to see her as often as I would like to. So I guess fuck their advice and ask her out on a date next time I see her?

>>17824226
Comfort him, ask him if he's feeling alright, tell he we can go again if he wants, otherwise we'll try again another time.

>>17824244
sure, worst thing can happen is that she says no and you can move on to the next girl.

Girls like confidence and if you go with the "let's hangout and be friends first" approach could be decremental.

>>17824258
>>17824233
what if he cum fast every time you had sex..?

>>17824275
If he made an effort to make me cum first, then I wouldn't mind so much. I do like penetration though, so it might become an issue after a while, though I would encourage him to seek medical help. I honestly couldn't tell you for sure since I've never been in that situation.

>>17824244

yes. trust me, we prefer to know for sure what your intentions are as early as possible. I respect guys who are upfront and say what they mean, and i'm upfront with them in return.

>>17824275
It would depend on whether he was willing to talk about it. I mean, any girl who is actually kind and/or loves their boyfriend wouldn't leave him over it.

I would ask him to make me cum first. If it really kept going, I'd advise him to seek medical help.

Guys
-What exactly is the right balance of clothing to not be seen as slutty etc. but also dress nicely and not super modest/boring.

For example, my general style is either vintage/retro 30s/40s/50s/60s clothing (Not the SJW modern take on 50s, i.e. rockabilly, but genuine stuff), or like, pretty blouses with skirts that generally come either just above or below the knee. Appropriate, or no?

>>17824299
Are you fishing for compliments or validation or something? Why in the world would any guy think that what you wear is 'slutty'?

>>17824304
No, I'm simply curious as to what one could get away with and not. I don't think what I wear is slutty. Quite the oposite, I worry that it's too boring.

>>17824299
I tend to think of the clothing as "slutty" if it just exists to show off her assets, versus accentuating them. Vintage clothing normally doesn't normally fall under that to me, a crop top and a push up bra does.

>>17824279
>>17824285
well that's nice to hear.
Had the experience with my ex, the only thing she say after a while was that I was selfish (even though I did plenty of foreplay and always tried to make her cum beforehand) and tell about it to all her friends.
Needless to say it shattered any sort of confidence on me.

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>>17824225
>that's because I'm /lit/ trash and have a reading superiority complex.
Arguably worse than a robot

>>17824320
It wasn't me. I never pretended that everyone on there is functional. I just really love reading and can't talk about the books I read to anyone I know in real life. They all read John Green

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>>17824269
>>17824281
Awesome! I'll ask her out then. I caught her looking at me a couple of times and she kinda invited herself in a conversation I was having with another chick.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it but its better than no attention

>>17824326
I was told to go back to rpgcodex last time I posted there. These wounds will never heal

>>17824339
Arguably its full of wankers. But at least they've heard of Dostoevsky etc. Last time I went to a bookclub with girls my own age, I was reading Crime and Punishment and they were all reading A Fault in Our Stars.

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>>17824299

Post pics...for reference.

>>17824343
>they were all reading A Fault in Our Stars.
Why is that even so popular. Most of the college age women I know were practically salivating when that movie came out.

>>17824349
Mmmhmmm.
tbqh I am not dressed at all nicely rn. Why dress up to laze around for a day and browse 4chan.

>>17824357
It's just non mainstream romance enough to appeal to 'alternative' girls, tumblr types and basic bitches alike. John Green has marketing genius, I'll give him that.

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>>17824372

Well I'm 30 and curious what you think is vintage.

I've been told I'm an 'Old Soul' my entire life since I've always liked older trends, fashions, beliefs, customs, etc.

The Rockabilly and Vintage-hybrid stuff can look cute/sexy/slutty but it can't compare to true vintage.

Come on, thrill me.

Dont know if this is the place to ask this but oh well

Girls (or guys actually, doesnt fucking matter)

If your bf/gf of around 6 months (who is way less sexually experienced than you) asked you if u could take a time off because he was insecure about his situation and wanted to see whats out there.

How would you react?

>>17824394
The minute he did that, we'd be finished.

>>17824391
Are you Male or Female?
Also, do you want genuine pictures of me? Because I hardly want pictures of me floating around 4chan.

A girl and I have great chemistry and identical worldviews, personal philosophies, and want the exact same thing out of a relationship. We're not together because after our first date, a mutual friend we both trusted absolutely lied to both of us (told me she's found someone else, told her I found someone else), so that another friend, who is nice, gentle, boring, and insecure, would have a shot with her. Gentle guy took that shot, I forgot about it for weeks.

Invited them both to a party when I bumped into her accidentally, she brought him with, she and I ended up talking in my room for hours. He left by himself, she and I talked about relationships and later we nearly kissed (moral compass though).

The next night I figured I'd tell her what I had changed my perspective and was more open to relationships after having spent time with her, but didn't need to her choose me or even choose that night. Which she was fine with because she said she wanted to make things work with gentle guy and that she and I should be friends. I said I wasn't interested in friendship and left.


We've been talking every now and then in person, and I've learned what gentle guy wants from a relationship is the exact opposite of what she wants.


Do I let their potential relationship die it's natural death (it shouldn't have existed in the first place) or say something?

I'll look like a self-centered asshole if I say this to her tomorrow, but she trusts me absolutely since I unravelled our mutual friend's web of lies and told her about it.

>>17824394
No thank you! We're over

>>17824398

Male and cut your face off so no one can identify you. Your call on the genuine pictures, they can be you or just your clothes.

>>17824394
>How would you react?
Dump them on the spot. It's not like I've slept around, I've only been with two women. If you think getting some strange actually means anything it's better to get rid of them sooner than later.

It's stupid that you felt this was a question worth asking.

>>17824394
I would feel disrespected and I don't think I could keep a relationship with someone that tell me something like that.
I'm a guy btw.

>>17824401
Sounds like the friend is awful.
Look, if you're willing to wait a bit, but distance yourself a little, to protect your feelings, I'd wait for the current relationship to die out. If they are as incompatible as you say, it shouldn't take long. But if they are, you clearly read the situation with her and her take on things wrong (or she lied), which would mean it was a wrong hope anyway. Either way, don't ever speak to the friend who fucked it up again.

>>17824416
Yeah, dropped that friend as soon as I figured out what he'd done and confronted him about it (he lied again. Total sociopath.)

Distancing myself wouldn't be too difficult. We're on break soon and I have travel plans, she has travel plans, other guy has no travel plans and is unhappy about her leaving.

Still, we've already arranged to talk tomorrow. Kind of a coin toss right now.

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>>17824407
tbqh it takes forever to do hair and makeup etc. and I'm not exactly the most confident about anything body related really. Basically exactly like pic. (as in I make some in this style exactly from old patterns).

>>17824425
Can you cancel the talk and simply wait?
If she's your dream girl, you don't scare her off by appearing jealous (and believe me, jealousy is very unattractive).

>>17824436
I don't think me being jealous is even something she could feasibly consider, at this point. The same week she and the gentle guy started seeing each other, I'd been texting our mutual friend about my perspective on emotional connections. That I didn't feel rejected by her and was at peace with the two of them getting together, since they did seem really compatible; I said it was more about how dating wasn't something I enjoyed and wasn't the way I felt I'd feel what I wanted to feel with someone I cared about. Coincidentally, the way I'd described it in that text is similar to what she described three weeks later in my room. I showed her that text earlier this week, because we'd been talking again about relationships.

>>17824447
So what is your gut reaction then? Tell her, or wait?

>>17824451
Tell her.
If we're not together and they are because of someone stepping in and being dishonest, then stepping in and being honest to separate them seems like poetic justice.

But I dunno, thin line to walk.

>>17824457
It is. Like I said, it could come across as jealousy, but not doing so could result in losing the chance at a relationship.

>>17824312
Guys will not care if you look boring. Seriously like anything more sophisticated than a XL T shirt and sweats and we will think you look great.

Dress for you girl. Make yourself happy by the way you look. Don't care what we think, be able to look yourself in the mirror and say "Damn I'm hot". THAT is what we find attractive. That confidence and swagger in yourself and your looks. So rock you girl.

>>17824479
Thank you, that was very uplifting. Most of the girls around me (I won't call them friends, they hardly qualify) are constantly hooking up and show their ah, assets, off all the time. I simultaneously wouldn't want to dress/be like that and are kind of lonely. Lose/lose situation.

>>17824163

>It's like she's purposely toying with my emotions

Well you kinda answered your own question bud. She may also think you're gay.

>>17824460
Well, all's fair in love and war. I suppose the real issue is in /how/ to say what I have to say.

>>17824147
Do you know them IRL? Like what makes you want to ask them out if you never see them.

>>17823113
The stuff you haven't explored. You can't explore everything about a person in one sitting.

>>17822896
I laugh. Like seriously I don't get this envy for Chad. Like getting large quantities of easy pussy is a massive accomplishment that commands my respect or envy.

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>>17822896
Yes, I get incredibly jealous because he's confident and happy and he's probably fucked a hundred chicks while I've fucked zero. I treat him the same as anyone else though because I don't hate the guy for being better than me.

Girls

Honest thought about someone being a virgin (or at least very sexually inexperienced) at 24

>>17824570
Personally I'd be glad they weren't a fuckboy.
But I'd also wonder if there was something wrong, like, are they creepy or something.
If I really liked them however. I wouldn't mind, and it certainly wouldn't be a reason to not go out with them.

>>17824570
Nothing inherently wrong with it, but it does raise the question why? If it's just because they didn't have the time/interest in a relationship before me that's actually kinda a plus. If it's because there's underlying prudishness or insecurities then I'd be concerned.

But my problem would never be the fact they're a virgin alone.

>>17824622
I have just never found a girl I found interesting, 95% of the girl I meet are stacys and I have 0 interest in them.

Ayy girls, I just want you all to know, and I hope you understand (even though you're going to assume otherwise or have some orbiter convince youotherwise) that you are the reason we can't have nice things.
t. every man in the world

>>17822896

I admire his abilities, and think that he is probably a pretty good dude and that I should learn to be more like him.

>>17822896
I am not sure. I do have this friend that is I guess a Chad but the guy is cool as fuck and a total bro. If anything, its admiration that I have for the guy.

>>17824622
Mmmm i would say it was a mix of not having time plus seeing parent fight for years then divorce that made me cynic about relationships in general

>>17824634
Go back to /r9k/

For women

Is it weird that a guy who is commonly considered to be highly intelligent by his friends does not consider intelligence in a woman to be an important feature in his being attracted to her? A female friend asked me about how much being intelligent matters to me according to my preferences in women, and she was shocked that I said that "It isn't very important to me."

Also, bonus question, women always say that intelligence matters so much for them being attracted to them. But most guys who get lots of women don't really appear to be all that intelligent as far as I can see. What gives ?

>>17824655
>But most guys who get lots of women don't really appear to be all that intelligent as far as I can see. What gives ?
Because most guys that consider themselves intelligent are... not all that intelligent.

>>17824659
>Is it weird that a guy who is commonly considered to be highly intelligent by his friends does not consider intelligence in a woman to be an important feature in his being attracted to her?
No, why would it be?

>But most guys who get lots of women don't really appear to be all that intelligent as far as I can see. What gives ?
These guys are not the guys that the women who say intelligence matters to them are talking about.

>>17824659
> women always say that intelligence matters

I think it depends on the woman. An intelligent man in a dumb woman's eyes is very different to an intelligent man in an intelligent woman's eyes. For the dumb woman, intelligence in the modern world= potential wealth. Whereas most intelligent women can get their own wealth, and seek an intellectual peer.

>a guy who is commonly considered to be highly intelligent by his friends does not consider intelligence in a woman to be an important feature

It's not weird. It might leave said unintelligent women open for manipulation, if you're that type. It's mildly disappointing, being an often described as intelligent woman myself (Straight A+ student, reads all the time etc.), but not unheard of.

Unintelligent men go for unintelligent women, intelligent men go for unintelligent women, and intelligent women better hope their bi or lesbian or they end up with cats.

For girls:
Do you see it as taboo if someone tells you their feelings for you if you're seeing someone else? Now, I'm of course not expecting to steal her from her bf, and she's not the kind of person to cuck me by rubbing their relationship in my face. I just want to know if the feelings I have are better off unsaid or not.

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>>17824299
Just don't show a bunch of cleavage/stomach nor a shitton of make up and you're fine desu

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>>17824080
If there is even a 1% chance of doubt we take it as an absolute certainty

Sorry

>>17824668
That goes for women as well

>>17824670
I get that some women aren't interested in the type of men who get lots of women. But it seems lopsided when you notice how many women claim to value intelligence, versus how well fairly unintelligent men do with all sorts of women.

>>17824672
I guess I'm skeptical about if anyone actually cares about intelligence in regards to our romantic and sexual relationships, at last for its own sake. It seems like a big farce to me.


That is good insight though, thanks.

>>17824091
So what? A maybe is more likely a no than yes in this culture where stuff like ghosting is normal. The fact is if a girl just feeds you maybes and jerks you around it's a better use of your time to put yourself out there and talk to other women instead.

Women complain a lot that men cast their nets wide, but at the end of the day it's pretty much a necessity if you want to have any luck with dating. The current meta is to shoot out as many messages as possible and not wasting time on ambiguity if you don't have things settled.

>>17822848
Honestly, by my own standards, 6-7/10 at least. If you're really cool and we connect, the mermaid effect kicks in and you could be elevated to 9/10

>>17822848
as long as you are not a landwhale (a little overweight is not landwhale) and atleast try to look like a girl I dont care that much.

Ladies:

How would you feel if you found out your boyfriend was bisexual?

>>17822848
If she has a cool personality but meh looks then I would probably just want to ( very enthusiastically) be friends with her.

>>17823306
i'm 22 and i feel my dick is shrinking from lack of use. but seriously it's probably just because your metabolism's slowing down, getting fatter = peen looks smaller

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How do you just go up to people (women, at my uni) at like a food place/hang out etc. and start up a conversation. I'm always used to taking with people and going for those on my sports teams/classes, but I realized I need to expand my horizons as far as dating potential goes

>>17824744
You don't. That's not a normal thing people do.

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>>17824747
So movies and tv shows lied to me?

>>17824731
Great. I am too. It basically means you can be open about what you find attractive, and they're not worried you're going to fall into the bi stereotype of being a cheater.

>>17824701
I've been in relationships with men far less well read, with far less political knowledge, etc. It's awful. Intelligence for me stipulates the depth to which you can discuss and see the nuances of a topic.

The same goes for friends though. Typical female small talk bores me half to death.

Women, would you be freaked out if someone walked up to you that you and tried to make conversation at a place that wasnt a bar or club?

Girls

Are any music genres a particular red flag for you when a guy listens to them? For when I run or stuff I listen to like older rap and rock, but normally I listen to a lot of older sounding (80s/90s) romanticy ballady stuff.

>>17824770
Depends. If I was clearly engrossed in something, or had headphones in, I'd think they were rude.

One notable experience of this was when I was asleep on a long train journey, and the minute I woke up a guy got into the seat beside me (trapping me, it was the aisle seat) and pestered me for my number.

However, if I was all alone in a cafe or something, I'd probably enjoy the company. But then I'm lonely and don't have any good friends, so, you know.

>>17824780
Rap is a turn off.
However I love older rock and 80s stuff, like the Cure and The Eurythmics and the Smiths.
I think Classical is also a turn off, not because I think it sounds bad, but because the people who listen to classical are usually really pretentious.

Pop. I hate it, and I've never met anyone, male or female, who listened to run of the mill top 100 stuff that didn't bore me to tears.

>>17824781
yeah of course, try not to be awkward right?

On a similar note do you think its possible to do something like this just to be friends? I feel like a relationship with a woman is always very orbital or gf/bf sort of thing and never just good friends

Women, what do you think of a guy who as a hobby produces 3DX porn among other 3D works?

Just a thing on the side of work and D.I.Y. projects. Mind you being a business owner, one's tolerance for passive-aggressive behavior is fairly low as I ferret that kind of thing out fairly quickly in prospective employees and nip it in the bud before it gets to be problematic. Family considers me to be fair, but somewhat of a hardass.

Curious.

>>17824792
Definitely. I would love that tbqh. I have a bf, but not many actual friends (not a manipulative thing, this was an issue long before he came along).

>>17824797
> what do you think of a guy who as a hobby produces 3DX porn among other 3D works?

Look, if I've watched it, it's hypocritical of me to judge you for making it. That being said, most women don't watch it, so I wouldn't bring it up on a first date.
>Just a thing on the side of work and D.I.Y. projects. Mind you being a business owner, one's tolerance for passive-aggressive behavior is fairly low as I ferret that kind of thing out fairly quickly in prospective employees and nip it in the bud before it gets to be problematic. Family considers me to be fair, but somewhat of a hardass.

Curious.

What are you asking here?

>>17824770
Not at all but it's difficult to know how to start off such a situation. I found myself in one for the first time where I really like him but we did not meet in a social environment or through friends. It's fine if it's not just a one off

>>17824780
It's fine. A varied taste is good. Classic stuff that's influenced current generations, all fine

>>17824803
>wouldn't bring it up on a first date.
Wouldn't dream of it. More something I keep to myself. It's more like "Oh shit, how the fuck do I present this?" because it's stupid to think the truth wouldn't eventually come out somehow that I produce some kind of porn even if it's only fiction.

>What are you asking here?

I added that because it (I'd hope) differentiates me from the typical internet pr0n fapper enough to be forgiveable.

On the one hand I see no reason not to behave in a mutually decent way sort of like a country gentleman despite being direct and frank. You could say I have a rugged sort of chivalry, though it's not unconditional like the old days but more hinged on how ladylike the gal is. (If she's a belligerent roller derby bitch whose not afraid to be a scrapper and drinks everyone under the table, then all bets are off.)

On the other hand, even trying to avoid being a total schmutz (schmuck-putz) seems ironic in a hypocritical way. Like I'm merely covering up using kindly face for the fact I contribute to the dark vile cesspool of the internet. While people make their choices and have nobody to blame but themselves, I've always wondered if that isn't just a cheap disclaimer cop-out... Point being: While I've never felt my cordiality to be motivated by anything other than decency, is it hypocrisy or cognitive dissonance because I also produce works that are just this side of indecent?

>>17824843
Look, just as women who present as 'ladylike' may also watch brutal BDSM, so you make it and are also capable of being gentlemanly. Humans are complex and contradictory creatures.

It wouldn't be a deal breaker for me, and nor should it be for any girl who can realise that it's only one small part of your personality. Hell, this hypothetical woman might even be into it.

For girls and guys

There's this girl I used to like. I got over her didn't really speak to her for a year. Started talking again and she was dropping really big hints. Met up a few times kind of dating I guess. At first I was passive as I wasn't sure whether I was interested or not. I figured out what I wanted so started being a bit more flirty and dropping my hints. Since then she seems to be less interested and I'm getting the impression she no longer wants to talk to me that much.

The fuck?

>>17824505
I know them IRL, we just have a lot of similar interest. And we both show each other similar attention on social media.

>>17824856
Thanks.

I suppose it all depends on the semantics of the term "gentleman". I'll not get into that, though.

It's something I've wondered about for the time I'd be ready. Gotta make sure my folks can retire, or semi retire (or whatever they're gonna do) in the next few months first.

As to my porn...I'm not listed but if you want an idea of the kind of stuff I'm into making, it's the type you see from artists at affect3d and on various blogs. We're niche even among rule 34 of the internet, which is still niche among porn in general.

Boys and girls:

My girlfriend won't stop talking to her ex. We've discussed it a million times. She says she will, but she doesn't. Yesterday, I found out that she basically complains about our relationship to him.

Now, the easiest thing to do is to dump her, and maybe I should. But how can I manage to fix this? How can i find out why she keeps recurring to him?

We are great together except for this thing and minor fights (philosophical differences, groceries one of us forgets to do, cleaning, etc.), and I have feelings for her, which she shares (I believe).

Any advice?

>>17824861
Drop it. Minimize contact to sparingly, as in only letting her do the initiating. If she doesn't, then you know what's up. Send a xmas text if you want, but if she's not reciprocating interest and you haven't seen her in a year, something else is in her radar. Work on yourself, fitness it up, pick up some new hobbies like dancing and scuba so you have date night plans/skills and something interesting to talk about. Oh, I went to this new resturant downtown (cool, but that convo ends in a minute unless you make plans to go together) compared to Oh, yeah I just came back from exotic place diving with hammerhead sharks (that's pretty cool)

>>17824940
How long into the official relationship are you? How long dated beforehand?

>>17824940
fix what? this sounds like a toxic relationship if she lied to you. She probs wants you to break upo with her so she can get back together with him

>>17824940
Look, I'd like to say that they've just attained that level of friendship that people aim for after breakups. However, the fact that she's complaining about you to him might indicate that she misses him.

She might be comparing the two of you, and is just unable to decide, so she's keeping her options open. Kind of harsh, but a possibility.

>>17824940
Ultimatum. Either him or you.
I am generally against it but it's disrespectful to be so close to an ex, and unless she has good a reason to keep talking to him, she should drop it.

>>17824940
>Yesterday, I found out that she basically complains about our relationship to him.
And that's the one. Time to drop her. Going behind your back and lying is a big red flag

>>17824956
Gave similar ultimatum to my ex about her "bestie" that kept meddling with our relationship because she can't keep her nose or opinions out of people's lives. "Keep her for short term (because when she latches into a new guy she'll leave you in the dust) or me for long term. In fact, let me make this even easier, I'll just end this right now and you two can be together, forever" and walked out

I really like the looks of colored haired girls, punk girls and goth girls etc. But i myself am very conservative with my dressing style. It just suits me better and i dont like the way men look in the scene at all.
Would you say that this is an issue? Am i overthinking?

>>17825041
No, not an issue, it's just taste. goth men in particular look really edgy. However a kind of alternative look can look okay, patterned shirts and the like.

>>17824770
No. It happened to me before on the street in Japan. But there, they call that nampa. Mostly it depends for me how the other person looks and talks. Just the vibe. Some guys can be straight up creeps by asking a number way too fast. So try to take it slow. And be actually interested in the other person, as a person, not as someone you can get lucky with.
>>17824780
Apres-ski (European here)

>>17824177
Refer to what I said here. >>17824179
That is definitely better than a maybe

>>17824718
I see what you mean, but I am referring to the type of answer that lies between maybe and yes.

>>17822848
>meh looks

Can't be defined.

>>17822844
Honestly don't care. I'll be nice to her if she's nice to me because I don't care to uselessly fight with people.
And having fucked 200 dudes is not something I aspire to do or would be proud of, so I'd not be in any way jealous either.

>>17823271
I doubt anyone I don't know is masturbating to me since I'm not posting nudes online or anything like that.

>>17823439
I never much enjoyed video pornography, but then and now I've always fantasized about people I know, friends from school, a friend I played volleyball with a lot has been stuck in my head basically constantly from 14 onwards.
Then I've been reading a lot of smut/erotica, fanfiction of all kind. A lot of lesbian stuff because it's often written by girls so more loving/sensual and realistic.
A bit of BDSM stuff as well, but again the loving, passionate kind and not getting abused or whatnot. I like being submissive, tied up, blindfolded, teased endlessly, or made come over and over again while I'm helpless. Stuff like that.

>>17824690
Not taboo, but it'd put me in an awkward position, especially if I'm good friends with the guy.

>>17824731
Wouldn't mind at all, but I'd like to know beforehand honestly.

>>17825098
>since I'm not posting nudes online or anything like that.
Sorry, but we guys don't need that if we want to masturbate to you.

>>17825103
Well, what do you need? I don't have bikini pictures on my Facebook, in any case neither my butt nor my boobs are particularly big, and I'm definitely not a model.
I can imagine someone masturbating to me if they're attracted to/in love with me, that's normal I figure.
But just a random guy I don't even know? I dunno.

>>17825106
I guy you don't know is probably difficult, but if a guy talks to you and sees you occasionally at school/job and if his mind is not desensitized by porn, imagining a girl naked is all we need really.

>>17825109
Well yeah I get that, I'm just saying realistically, I probably wouldn't be his first choice unless he was crushing on me.
If it's just sexual, there's just prettier girls around.

>>17825109
>imagining a girl naked is all we need really.
Or to be more clear, imagining sexy times with a girl is all we need, you can even be fat or whatever, we don't care, if I picture we together naked I'm going to have an erection and then you what happens.

>>17825113
You don't to be first choice, you just need to exist in his surroundings.

>>17825113
>there's just prettier girls around.
This is an interesting topic btw, the fact that both sexes project onto the other gender their own preferences.

Man (or at least young men) think girls only want and desire 'Chad', hyper-masculine dude, ripped and so on while average guys get nothing.
Women (or at least young women) think guys only want the prettiest, feminine-st, big boobed 'Stacy' while girls that don't have big ass or breasts or aren't caked on make-up don't spark sexual desires in men.

>>17825129
I don't think guys want only the prettiest, DD-bombshell girl, necessarily, but I think if given the choice, or the freedom of masturbatory fantasy, they'll go for the prettier girl, yes.
Again, unless they're in love with the other one.

>>17825133
Trust me, it's not always true. The girl's hotness is less important than the act itself.

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>girlfriend's boss always flirts with her in sleazy ways, tries to give her massages, tell her what a great butt she has, etc.
>recently he brought her to his house, started kissing and groping her chest suddenly before she pulled off and walked out the front door
>that was about a week ago
>the other day he told her how intelligent and skillful she is with clients, etc.
>she was telling me how it's the first time she's been appreciated purely for her talent
>made a joke about how she loves her boss now
Give it to me straight. Is she cheating on me?

>>17825141
I meant to say that SHE made a joke about how she loves her boss now.

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>>17825141

>>17825141
Call me old-fashioned but I don't think a woman in a relationship should accept a ride from her boos to her house, specially if he's been sleazy.

>>17825152
They were driving back to the office from some client's meeting.

>>17825156
Either way, you are making a fool of yourself if you don't go face to face with her and make things clear. If you don't confront her, she will think she can get away with it.

>>17825159
Oh I did. I asked her what the hell she was thinking being alone with him and going to his house like that.

>>17825167
I had an ex-gf that was like that, deep down I think she like to make me jealous and fight with her, emotions, drama and so on. I couldn't stand that.

>>17825170
Yeah she's very insecure. But do you think she's cheating on me? Or considering it?

>>17825171
This is definitely not a person who's emotionally satisfied with you, even if she's not outright cheating. "Made a joke about how she loves her boss now', wtf.

>>17825173
I guess I'll start looking for other dating options. Thanks.

>>17824956
When I asked her why she keeps talking to him, she said, and I quote, that "I can't be this harsh to people". It made no sense to me then, and it makes no sense to me now.

>>17825176
The problem with those kind if relations is that they're addictive, once you get into those games and fights, their emotion peaks seem to make a more stable relation boring or unfulfilling. And even if you try a more direct approach to get what you want, your partner simply is too used to the jealousy approach to get i.

Girls :

How'd you feel if i tell that i want to see your turboslut side opening ? I want to share you, gangbang you, have a swinger kind of lifestyle but still, you'd be MY girl and i wouldnt want another woman with me, i just want some kinky sex involving others people...
How much are you opposite to the idea of being shared ? Having as much dicks as you want (or pussy) but still have a good monogamous relationship ?
It's hard to find girls who like plurality sex, why ? Are we not equal now ? Are you not slutty as men are now ?

Pls say yes

>>17825233
100% against it.
The idea that you can decide to share me is humiliating - you don't own me, I decide who I fuck with.
I'm not your girl if you don't mind me getting fucked by other people. We're not in a monogamous relationship if I'm getting someone else's cock.
And I don't want "dicks". I love sex, I am always horny, but I wouldn't fuck a random dude. I want my guy.

>Are we not equal now?
The idea that you can share a partner, that you own them, is the least equal thing ever.

>>17825233
>Pls say yes

This sounds like wanking material. Talking like this will get you dumped in most relationships. Not all because you might find another crazy person.

I was texting with my ex bf (i had to contact him for a reason). We were chatting a little bit, talking about random stuff and joking around. At some point i discover he still keeps something that belongs to me! I start to joking around and ask him why did he keep that, we were joking, and for some reason i thought it was okay to ask him if he still likes me.
He hasnt responded since then. What would that mean?

>>17825233
Totally agree with what >>17825241 said, the idea of some guy "sharing" me with his friends like I'm a blowup doll makes my skin crawl. Sex without the emotional side is just glorified masturbation to me, so no thank you.

>>17825248

HE is deciding whether he has a shot with you right now. If he thinks he does, he will say "yes". If he thinks he doesn't, he will "no" and wait until he thinks he does.

>>17825241
well, you can share me with other girls if you want, i'm not against it.

And the whole idea of sharing you is obviously with your consent.

>>17825255
Not her, but that's the thing. You want to share your partner, or be shared yourself, because that's your fetish. Most girls won't be into it I would wager. I certainly am not.

>>17825253
But he told he that he was talking to another girl, it seems like we both have moved on!
It's also been like 2-3 days since i asked him that question

Why do all women cheat, and how do I find a way around this?

>>17825263
Die a virgin. I'm sure it'll come naturally.

>>17825263
Cheat on them.

So in my criminal justice class, there a pretty cute girl, i wanna ask out. I was wondering if anyone could give some advice on breaking the ice? Please and thank you!

>>17825257
no problem with that.
I just think it would be fun, that's all, i can live without fulfilling that kind of fantasy, because i respect my partners wishes and sexuality, but i'd totally be down if someone can be sincere enough to love me and have fun with other people at the same time (with me ofc), we could be like, just sharing living dildo you know, not consider them as emotional being since we'll just fuck and never see them again.

Maybe i'm crazy, maybe it's the last 2 years without a gf that made me too horny, i don't know.

>>17825266
I'm not a virgin, though.
>>17825268
What if it's not in a man's nature to cheat on a woman?

>>17825233
You'll have to get a really submissive girl if you want this.

I was into a Dom/sub relationship once, but he was very possesive and he never considered the idea of sharing me although many people in the scene do it. I was ok with that, it made me feel like his special "pet". Even after we finished the reñationship we are still friends and he is very protective.

Also there is the scenario where your girl may fall for one of the guys you are sharing her with. There is always the possibility this happens.

>>17825272
Just do it, they don't give a shit if they cheat as well.

>>17825270
I can only speak for myself of course but I think girls are generally more into the emotional side of sex, so it'd be difficult to find a girl who's into this semi-anonymous, living dildo lifestyle I guess.
Surely they exist, but probably more in the BDSM subculture I'm guessing.

>>17825255
> i'm not against it.
I am tho.
I don't want my boyfriend to fuck someone who isn't me. I'm definitely monogamous and I have never been good at sharing.
Especially when I don't gain shit from it. I stay at home ironing your shirts, cooking you dinner and cheering you up when you had a bad day at work while you also enjoy the single life and fuck whoever you wish?
Come on.

I don't brush my teeth.

I do however chew xylitolic bubblegum.

is this a turn off?

Fuck brushes.

>>17825333
Yeah. It takes literally five minutes of your day and makes quite a difference.

>>17825337
>five

If I get paid 10 bucks a minute to brush my teeth then I'd do it.

>>17825351
You asked if it's a turn-off. I just answered. You don't have to brush your teeth.

She and I are not having sex, except maybe once every 2-3 weeks. She has body image issues and says I'm bad at positioning. Maybe I am, but practice and communication matter too.

Sex isn't something she does for me, and it should be based off mutual desire but it's not there. Anytime it does happen, it feels like we've jumped through a lot of hoops and it only happens when she's in a state where she'd rather screw *any* guy rather than want to be with me. Yet she would rather I stay than leave.

Is there any way to salvage this, or how do I go about dumping her and gtfo'ing? She's throwing hints she may also be suicidal too (she's had this happen to a family member when she was young too).

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23F guys and girls
> is love the only thing successful to a relationship?
I just feel my boyfriend and I are going down different roads.
Thinking of breaking up with my ldr bf of 5 months. We've dated for 2 years in the past. It's gonna hurt him and myself very badly. I guess I'm more interested in dating a man

>>17825359
Don't stick it in crazy but since it's too late for that, just say you don't feel this relationship is fulfilling and happy for you and leave.

>>17825269
Talk to her about anything

>>17825365
> is love the only thing successful to a relationship?

No. I love people that are bad for me and while I'd want to be there for them more and give them more, I know it's unhealthy. So just loving someone doesn't make the relationship worthwhile.

>>17825365
Love itself is a product of passion, responsibility, and willingness to meet in the middle. Passion without responsibility is lust, responsibility without passion is just obligation. If the two of you aren't going down the same road and it's more of a fight, end it now before it hurts even more.

So I have this female "friend", well she is my ex and we were supposed to meet in the city yesterday for drinks, and I got stood up and I waited for 1 hour and then went home. She won't answer my phone calls and text messages everything was fine until this happend yesterday. Why do women do this?

>>17825384
I've had that happen with guys too, but I don't believe all guys are cunts just because I happened to find one who is.

>>17822848
Literally just be thin. It's the difference between being a 3/10 and an 8/10. Don't stop at 'well I'm kind of slightly chubby but not quite overweight and that's fine right?' no it is not; that's like a 5-6/10 at best. If you are below 5'5" you should not weigh more than 115. Below 5'1", 105. Unlike men, women don't have to work out to be in shape. Literally just eat more vegetables and less of everything with calories for a few months and everyone will suddenly be nicer to you and want to date you. It's not shallowness-- on the contrary, it's that women's standards have fallen so low that anyone actually trying is suddenly highly attractive by comparison. The fact that you are asking whether you should even bother trying is quite telling.

>>17822848
I would rather be alone than date a chubby or fat woman, but other than that I don't care assuming no weird hygeine issues or deformities. Tbh I don't even care about acne if a girl is sufficiently nicely-shaped and smart, though I probably wouldn't admit that irl.

>>17822880
Short-haired tomboy girls can be really hot if they have nice bodies and intriguing personalities. Honestly the most important factor here is simply whether you are thin or not. It's almost the only thing that actually matters.

>>17822848
I could never date a girl uglier than my ex so my standard just goes up and up, idk how to fix this :'(

>>17822896
I have a couple of friends like that. One is kind of a jerk to people sometimes, but not to me and he's funny. The other is actually pretty nice. Doesn't bother me. I do wish I had their looks sometimes but I do alright for myself at least.

Do you think it is fair to expect someone beautiful as a partner if you yourself are not exceptional? For both genders.

>>17823937
I used to be completely incapable of cumming from blowjobs. Then I started having weird sensations that felt like normal orgasms but didn't release anything, and I could hit up to 3-4 of them within 5-10 minutes before I was either too exhausted to keep going or too incredibly horny to keep going without fucking my gf immediately. Then eventually midway through another relationship I started cumming normally from them, which frankly was a huge disappointment to me. To this day I have no idea what was going on.

If he can't orgasm from actual sex with you, though, then either he's gripping too tightly when fapping, watching too much porn, trying to have sex too often, or you're just not in good enough shape to keep him turned on. Hard to know without more info.

>>17823955
You're turning into a beta orbiter. Don't. I used to act so fucking cringy years ago with this shit. Just cut down on frequency, stop obsessing about this girl, be normal friends instead of thinking you're special, and keep an eye out for other girls to ask out.

>>17824080
Is this a troll post?
The reason is because women often try to minimize the probability of making someone feel hurt or upset or angry about being rejected, and if rejecting then they usually want him to just go away or go back to normal as quickly as possible with a minimal chance of lingering awkward/creepy/misunderstanding continuations of interest.
So they deflect. And deflect and deflect and deflect and 'hope he gets the hint'.
As a result, men learn to take anything less than absolute certainty as rejection, because usually it is, and there can be significant negative social consequences from being seen as 'creepy' by persisting when unwanted, even if it's completely by accident.

So if you want to say yes, say yes. Idk why you would do anything else unless you're just toying with this person.

>>17825412
Fair? What's it to do with fairness, you can expect to date Emma Watson and/or Matt Bomer, doesn't mean there's any chance of it happening.

>>17824114
Less is more.
The best should be almost imperceptible.
If I can immediately tell, it's a turn-off.
And if you have good skin you may not need any at all.
I mostly date Asian and half-Asian women and many only wear makeup at all for special events. One of my ex-gfs who was absolutely gorgeous didn't even know how to use it herself -- she only had professionals do it for her, for major events.

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So last January I met and started talking to a girl who was hesitant to go on a date with me due to breaking up from a long term (~3 years) relationship a few months prior. We were both in college. We texted/snapped at sporadic intervals and I occasionally went over to her place some weekend nights. I really liked her and when we hung out alone she seemed really into it but I felt more disinterest during the week or otherwise. This went on for a few months until June when I behaved shitty while drunk and we stopped talking for a few months.

She graduated and got a job in the same city I'm still going to school at (I'm graduating next May). I met her again at a bar a month/half ago and we started talking again, kind of the same deal as before, on/off moments of interest (texting or snapping me) in the past few weeks and I've walked her home a couple of times again. It really puts me in a bit of anguish because I like her a good bit and I'm confused because most girls I've talked to in the past were the ones wanting to talk often/regularly and get me to be serious with them.

Could a girl actually be seriously interested in a guy but only seem like she wants to hang out/hook up every other week? Is this some weird form of long game? For context I'm tall (6'3), muscular, fairly handsome and am graduating with a lucrative degree so I don't think I'm short in most metrics. I don't know how girl minds work I guess, I just need to know if I'm getting my heart meme'd on and need to ignore her the next time she hits me up

>>17824147
It's fine, I've done it before successfully. It's fine over txt, too. This generation is getting much less formal and more comfortable with text-based communication for these things.

>>17825446

I'm also 22 btw and decided to start looking for a serious gf about a year ago so that's how this thing kind of started

>>17824163
If they are currently involved with each other, then just tell her it bothers you. (Also, that would make her a slut for being touchy with you while seeing another guy; I would never tolerate that if I were that guy and I knew.)

If they aren't currently involved, then she might be flirting with you. Or she might see you as just a close friend and confidante. Try asking her out again, since her behavior toward you has obviously become much more affectionate. If she asks why, tell her it's because of how she's been acting lately. Totally reasonable.

>>17824275
Wear a condom if you don't already.
Try buying dapoxetine online if that isn't enough. Or get it from your doctor.
Don't rush when you fap.
Don't tense up too many muscle groups too early.

>>17824401
Move in for the kill. Convince her to break up with the the other guy and be with you instead. Do it confidently. "I think you should."

Utterly eliminate the liar. Betrayal is not forgivable.

>>17825436
I was more so basing this question of of the thread where an anon asked about what "We could always give it a shot!" meant.

My personal usage of that type of answer would be as a Yes, with a TBD day.

>>17824731
Negative. Most bi men lean gay. And most gay men are promiscuous. Could be abandoned or neglected securely or cheated on with a man.

Most bi women lean straight though fwiw. And it doesn't seem like men have any problem dating them in general.

>>17825141
That's disgusting and the exact definition of sexual harassment. Sue for millions and live on the interest.

>>17825263
They don't. I've never been cheated on. At least as far as I can tell. But I tend to go for fairly prudish shy girls. If you go for more emotionally open/public or promiscuous or drama-seeking girls, they are more likely to cheat.

My boyfriend hates Xanax that I stopped doing it for awhile. My friend of offering it for free and I wanna accept but I feel ashamed.
> do it behind boyfriends back?
He wanted me to inform him when I'm on em.
I'm not good at keeping secrets.
Should I just man up and tell him? Or am I ruining the relationship

>>17825406
You fix it by (a) getting tired of being lonely, (b) realizing that attractiveness is slightly subjective and that a girl you like automatically seems prettier to you, (c) compensating in other ways e.g. maybe she is smarter or better at sex or gets along with you better in general, (d) realizing that everyone gets uglier over time and appearances sometimes just change in general, and ultimately having a good relationship and conversations are the only things that matter in the long run.

>>17825412
Yes, but only if (a) you get used to a lot of rejection, (b) you don't mind being single most of the time, (c) you develop very strong relationship skills, (d) you work to improve yourself as a person more than most people do, (e) you accept that the other person is more likely to initiate a breakup or even cheat on you, (f) you accept that getting lucky and ending up with someone out of your league once and having it end sooner than you wanted won't leave you bitter forever thereafter. It can be done. It will just cost you more pain than usual.

>>17825412
I honestly don't recommend it though. You will likely be happier with someone more likely to care about you.

>>17825446
I honestly don't understand how social dynamics even work in your milieu. You're having sex with a girl and don't even know if she cares about you. You're both obviously pretty social and you yourself meet all the athlete stereotypes, even down to how you talk. I don't mean this in a bad way; it's just interesting to me. The desperate souls of /r9k/ would probably call you a "chad", and you would call them disgusting fuckups, and you would be right. Anyway--

If you're able to get in this girl's pants routinely, you should be able to talk about feelings and romantic goals. If you can't do that, then be more confident and do it anyway. Women like confidence and initiative and planning and responsibility. Plus, she's going to get lonelier as she spends more time post-graduation, and want more stability and probably a more serious relationship. Sounds like you're well positioned. Just ask her sometime-- get her talking about it and steer the conversation into defining what you are to each other.

I've never hooked up with anyone. Almost never go to parties. Bit introverted. Plenty of relationships, always long-term, always very attractive intelligent girls, often shy ones. Probably a dozen very close friends, a hundred decent ones, 500 acquaintances. Make a lot of money, top-10 university degree. I have friends like you but not close ones. You inhabit a different world than I do. I cannot conceive of myself as being in your lifestyle at all and yet I find it odd that I can't.

Anyway good luck.

GUYS AND GIRLS

So, i'm going straight to the point: My wife has incredible tits and is lactating, i want to suck her milk, but i'm worried that she will think it's awkward or that i'm some sick fetishist(i might be tho).

What do?

>>17825576
It's your wife, I mean if she's not into it she'll just say No and that's it, right? No harm done.

>>17824861
>>17824949
I've sort of dropped it. I'm just going back to being passive. Problem is I do want to talk to her and actually enjoyed her company.

She was the one who started talking to me again after this year off, why would she suddenly change?

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>>17825576
you already posted this

>>17825490
I'd take that as "yes" but also "I'm not sure about this so it might end up being short term and probably casual and I'm not that committed to the idea (at least not yet), so if it ends I will likely be the one who ends it, also I'm slightly surprised but open to considering". So for me, I would evaluate how much this girl seemed worth it, start out pretty casual to avoid seeming more serious than her too soon, and make sure I wouldn't care too much if she changed her mind and broke it off or just drifted away in 2 weeks. Your call. Just makes me less inclined to pursue. It's a "yes" and not a "maybe-meaning-leave-me-alone," but it's a more casual and less selective "yes" so I would have to expect less of it than usual.

>>17825529
Oh my god please stop taking them. They are more addictive than heroin in the long run, you can literally die from the withdrawal syndrome once you're dependent, they fuck your memory, they can make you stop even feeling human (DP/DR) for months or indefinitely when you finally manage to get back off of them. Fuck benzos. If you have anxiety, try propranolol, try picamillon or phenibut, try an antidepressant if you have depression with anxiety, but please don't start a fucking benzo habit. And if you just want to get high, literally anything but meth/crack/heroin is safer.

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>>17825612
He said no anyways. I doubt I'll ever be doing them again

>>17825612
Sorry, what's so horrible about benzos? I've never taken any but I'm curious.

>>17825599
I get what you are saying.

That she will be willing to try, but is unsure just what she wants pit of it.

Maybe she want to just see where it will lead naturally. She is not gonna necessarily push for something serious, but won't shy away if it does come to that.

>>17825632
... aside from everything I just wrote, you mean? Did you even read it? Did you read the wikipedia page? Did you read any firsthand accounts of what the withdrawal process is like? At a minimum these are things you should do before trying a new drug. I've used >20 different recreational drugs and never had a problem or developed a habit, but benzos are among the most potentiality harmful. They don't even feel like much, but dependence sneaks up on you and the road back to normalcy is often hellish, even compared to strong opiates.

How do I ignore the flirty girl at parties? There is always at least one, she might bring her boyfriend even, but she goes around rubbing up everyone and fake-falling into their arms. I know she's just teasing and flirting casually, but I can't stop hope from welling in my chest and feeling elated when I'm paid attention to. To make matters, worse, I know of one instance where a girl I thought was flirty was genuinely interested in me, but apparently flirted with one other guy so it wouldn't be obvious. How do I deal with flirty party girls?

>>17825655
*"potentially harmful" autocorrect

>>17825657
>I know she's just teasing and flirting casually, but I can't stop hope from welling in my chest and feeling elated when I'm paid attention to.
She wants you to feel that way. Because she wants everyone to feel that way. Because she likes making people feel cared about, even if she can't date all of you and probably doesn't want to. Some people are just really affectionate. It's not about you, it's just their personality. Roll with it. Have fun at the party. Don't be so serious.

>>17825657
>To make matters, worse, I know of one instance where a girl I thought was flirty was genuinely interested in me, but apparently flirted with one other guy so it wouldn't be obvious.
She was just taking a bad approach-- one unlikely to work for what she wanted to obtain, because it failed to get the right message across. Probably inexperienced, or just careless. Don't sweat it. There have been at least half a dozen confirmed cases when a girl I actually liked was apparently interested in me and I didn't notice or realize it at the time. It's just water under the bridge. There will always be others, don't worry about it.

>>17825392
And if you're about 5'6-7? (genuinely curious. Also I don't use that scaling, metric where I'm from)

Someone else said something similar above but here goes.
18F, in my first long term relationship (2 years), well, if I'm honest, my first relationship, period.

I get on well with my boyfriend etc, but I feel like we're drifting. He's becoming increasingly /pol/, in the sense of 'the jews did everything' white nationalism etc. (thankfully the misogyny hasn't shown up. If it did I'd leave), and his friends are even worse, to the point when they yell out those kind of slogans in public etc. which I find very embarrassing.

I find this kind of mentality lacks a basic civility, as it's founded almost entirely upon conspiracy theories and anger, and also tends to lack in the 'behaving well in public' department.

Aside from the political differences, he also seems to have no ambition, whereas I have a lot, and it's putting us at odds.

I love him, he loves me, but I feel we're going in different directions. What do I do?

>>17826022
I'm not actually sure. I've never dated a girl taller than 5'5" and I'm about 5'10" (average height). I tend to go for fairly petite women, usually 5'0"-5'2". I would guess maybe 120 but it's going to vary proportionally depending on build. A girl with really large breasts or a very curvy figure (curvy does not mean fat, contrary to obese idiots on tumblr, it has to do with bone and muscle structure and proportions) or an athletic muscular build is going to look her best at a higher weight than a girl who is really streamlined and fairly flat for instance.

The key here is just to minimize the amount of excessive subcutaneous fat in non-sexual regions. Girls are supposed to be softer than guys. And breasts are lovely. But if I can't see a girl's ribs and collarbones and jawline (just like I can see mine, albeit a bit softer) because they are covered in half an inch or an inch or more of random excess fat, then that is unattractive to me and that girl is objectively overweight relative to her build.

Personally, my three hottest past gfs were--
5'4" 115 pounds
5'0" 93 pounds
5'1" 100-110 pounds
In no particular order. Last one was bustier and curvy. Middle one was thin. First one pretty flat but kind of muscular, loved to play-wrestle and do rough things. They were all beautiful and wonderful people to be with in general. None were overweight.

Natural variation in body type means bone structure and muscle mass and breast size and so on. It does not mean 'lol I gained 15 pounds because I don't care about my partner's happiness and tumblr told me I could be healthy at any size'.

Girl #1 was easily an 8/10 when we were together. I saw photos several years later- she gained 15-20 pounds from medication. She now has a double chin, though the same cute features. 5/10 at best. If she weren't so cute it would be 4. Conversely I've even seen women with acne and one with a major hook nose who I'd call 7/10 as they were in such good shape.

>>17826048

Hmm. How many Jews do you actually know? Have you worked in law, finance, public policy, or scientific research, or interfaced heavily with people from those fields who were Jewish? If you look at the commenters spouting the most virulently anti-white and anti-male rhetoric on the left, they are largely Jews and blacks.

I have plenty of right-wing Jewish friends, too -- they don't do any of that crap and they don't seem to look down on me for being non-Jewish. Though they are still some of the most ambitious and politically savvy people I know.

But anyway, my point is: left-wing Jews actually have waged a coordinated war against the white majorities in western nations through the media and academia for many decades. They were also the majority of the relevant actors in the Bolshevik Revolution and the failed communist revolution in Germany in the early 20th century. These are objective facts. It's not all Jews, but a certain segment is very actively and deliberately attacking the foundations of western society and nepotistically allocating power and financial wealth preferentially to other Jews. And the ultra-religious ones are some of the harshest racists in the world, literally believing all other ethnicities were born to serve the Jewish people.

I don't know your bf, but some of the ideas discussed on /pol/ are not exactly wrong. Though often over-broad.

>>17826469
It's not the ideas, It's the presentation. I prefer civility etc. and people who are rage filled and take a 'fuck society' outlook tend to behave inappropriately in public.

I'd be equally mortified by someone who went on slut walks and other tumblr bullshit.

>>17826491
I agree with that, entirely. I worry sometime that the Internet and the widespread decline in civic institutions are making people more alienated from society and their fellow countrymen. Political polarization is also steadily increasing as people move into their side's respective media bubbles. Not good for political stability or efficient government or polite society.

Anyway, if I were in this type of situation, I would want to talk about the issues. Having been in lots of long-term relationships, I find that communicating about the relationship itself, about wants and needs and potential worries and what you can do to make each other happier and what you prioritize, are really crucial to having a good life while together.

It's always better to talk than to jump to a one-sided conclusion, especially about someone's fundamental nature when in practice situational circumstances are usually bigger influences (see 'Fundamental Attribution Error') and act on it crushingly and unilaterally without even giving the other party a chance for meaningful feedback and adjustment. A conclusion like 'we're growing apart; we have irreconcilable differences' when what you seem to have said is merely that you think his friends are annoying, that you wish he would discuss views more civilly, and that you aren't sure if he has strong goals right now or realizes that this is important to you. So talk about that.

1-2 years is also the range when I find that things tend to fall into a pattern of day-to-day life and sometimes stop trying as hard to care for one another and do special things. It's important to keep that going. It's a good thing to talk about, too.