ITT: Ask the Opposite Gender Anything

>>17809088
Claimed in the name of the Inquisition of Pegasus

to all da grillz, how much of a turn off is it if a guy has an apartment that is only marginally bigger than a shoebox apartment?

and also how much of a turn off is phimosis (to the extent where the foreskin can't be pulled back past the head at all. maybe 1 to 3mm diameter)

the 3 girls that have seen my dick didn't seem to mind/care, still very down to fuck.

Girls, how would you feel if your bf had a strong fetish for female body odor. Not like rancid pussy. Just normal day or two without washing. Would you accommdate this in any way?

>>17809109
If I like him otherwise, neither his apartment nor phimosis would change that.
If anything I might be afraid of hurting you accidentally if your foreskin can't be pulled back (dunno)

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Girls

Do you like spanking?

Girls, I feel a bit led on by this girl. Met this girl 3 months ago

>Would bake me food, constantly giving me cupcakes and muffins
>Send me "Miss you" Texts
>Hold onto me during football game
>Tell me spending time with me was her favorite

I asked her on a date, but she declined. Said during that time period she'd been texting this guy 2 hours away and going on a date with him.

How did I find myself so deep in the friendzone so quickly.

Shes mad at me I haven't really talked to her since, but I refuse to orbit.

>>17809120
Not really, no. But I have a friend who LOVES it. Depends on the girl.

>>17809120
Not really. I don't mind submission but spanking isn't my thing.

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Ladies

If I guy takes you out for your birthday, just the two of you, would you assume he was into you? What if he offered to drive instead of meeting up?

>>17809130
Yeah, pretty much.

No More Excuses Anon! This is Just Do It Anon.
I expect an update.

>>17809119
thanks. that is basically what the other girls said.
but nah, it doesn't really hurt unless i'm trying to go in when it's very dry. there is some give in that the skin can still move up and down the shaft.

even if dry, a bunch of lube to get us going is usually all that's needed to get things going.

if i masturbate a lot though (once or twice a day, consecutively) i can develop micro-tears that sting like fuck though. or if i am too vigorous with that. micro-tears have never been a problem with anything but my own hand.

>>17809139
That's interesting. I'm a total virgin and obviously my knowledge of the male genitalia is pretty limited. Thanks tho

>>17809134
Ok. Cuz I'm taking this girl out in Thursday, and she's rebuffed every guy this year who's asked her out. We've had a few hiking "dates" this year, and she agreed to let me treat her to dinner for her bday.

I'm hoping she's not that naive, but I figure my offer to drive will seal the deal.

>>17809121
Not a girl but you did the right thing homie.
Just wish her luck and move on.

>>17809145
oh, okay. to be fair, not many women would have experience with a penis with phimosis, at least not to this extent.

>>17809088
OK ladies, tell me, do you ever stop to enjoy the smell of your own farts??? I know i sometimes do... and i know that men do.... so, do you like your own brand???

I just want to pass by and say that I actually have been learning a lot reading those threads, thank you.

My male manager at work is a bully who only targets females. Why does he only do this to women?

>>17809292
Easy prey?

>>17809316
Some of the timid girls look like easy targets but why not bully shy men too since those do exist at my work?

>>17809088
So what do you want in a male friend, girls? I used to have a lot of female friends but sort of turned socially autistic and forgot how

Females friends are best friends ;~;

Ladies,

For those of you in a relationship, did you click with your significant other and have a lot of chemistry right off the bat? or did that person slowly grow on you over time?

I have a tendency to avoid getting romantically involved with guys if I feel like we don't or wouldn't have any chemistry. I'm not sure if my intuition is accurate or if I might be potentially missing out on a great romantic partner.

My ex (we haven't talked in about a year) just randomly texted me and asked who I voted for. I asked her and she just said "just wondering"
When I told her, she never replied.

Asked this last thread, but I'd like some more opinions:
If a guy has a flirty personality, would he flirt with someone he's not attracted to? I know this question makes me sound dense, but some of the circumstances in which he behaves flirtatiously aren't exactly appropriate for his behaviour.

>>17809424
give me examples

>>17809336
The first date is usually euphoria. Getting to know someone new is great.
Then they slowly grow on me, until they don't.

I suggest not falling head over heels in a couple of months. Get close, do cutesy couple stuff, but don't expect him to be the best guy ever. If it didn't work out - you only "lost" like 4 months of your life.

>>17809410
She was just curious or wanted to judge you.

>>17809424
I flirt with friends all the time and enjoy it when men flirt with me. I have a boyfriend. I don't care about these guys or are even interested in them. I like attention and witty comments.

Now, if it's vulgar shit then this guy may actually like you. You could ask if he is interested in you though.

>>17809333
because he is misogynistic and gross.

it's illegal and inappropriate and i hope he gets what is coming to him.

>>17809440
>She was just curious or wanted to judge you.
but.... why?

>>17809431
Has called me cute
We were texting about something and I said something was a gem and he responded "you're a gem"
Has asked if he can hold my hand (on more than one occasion)
Insists on a hug when we say bye (not in a beta "where's my hug?" sort of way)

I should note, I'm in a relationship and I'm perfectly happy in it, and he knows this. He's not some pathetic orbiter, he's a normal guy who definitely has a flirty personality. He doesn't flirt with our mutual friend who (and I don't mean to sound bitchy or anything) is less attractive than I am, if that changes anything

>>17809445
I don't know. Maybe you were important at one point?

>>17809446
sounds to me like he is in to you
or a creep

>>17809447
Well we do go back awhile. We were a couple freshman-sophomore year of highschool. We had our first kiss together senior year.
I tried getting her to hang out with a few friends in August but she turned us down. I don't post anything really political on facebook or any social media. It was just very out of the blue.

>>17809448
He's not a creep, so I guess that means it's the former?

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>>17809452
Yeah, she was probably just curious.

>>17809463
Probably. Time to choose!

>>17809468
But why would she be curious all of the sudden when I have never talked about politics with her? Its not like the election was yesterday

>>17809468
>Probably. Time to choose!
Choose what?

So I've been trying to flirt with this girl at work. Yes I know, bad idea, I'm beyond that. I think I've been doing well but I kinda want to do it a little more frequent with more intent. I teased her about how we got a complaint because a customer supposedly found a long blonde hair in their pizza. Opened the door for me to compliment her hair and ask about it being her natural color. Trying to walk the border of highly interested and creep? I think it's been going on long enough for me to do so.

>>17809474
I think you are hoping that she wants to hang out or talk to you again. If so, just tell her so instead of over-analyzing a text.

>>17809477
The new, flirtatious guy or your current lover. You could also keep ignoring him.

>>17809478
If you think you have sufficiently flirted. Just ask her out.

>>17809481
>I think you are hoping that she wants to hang out or talk to you again. If so, just tell her so instead of over-analyzing a text.
This may be true but... you don't think its odd that she would ask that... randomly, out of the blue with no context?

Male, neckbeard meeting two females soon for a room to stay in. Advice? I shaved, made sure I'm clean.

Just social stuff.

>>17809490
Just be confident. Don't be flirty.

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Can anybody help me?

Whenever I'm out in public or at school, I'll often notice women looking at me. I only know because I kinda catch them in the act when I accidentally make eye contact with them. Normally they look away quickly, but a lot of the time It's worse because they keep staring for a couple seconds longer and it's really awkward. Is there something wrong with me?

Then sometimes they come up to me randomly and start talking to me. Yesterday I was doing spanish hw at the computers and this chick sat next to me and started talking to me. We didn't even know each other and she just starts talking to me about my spanish class and other things. This happens all the time whenever I'm by myself and It always catches me off guard and I didn't really know what to do initially so I just make small talk until I find an excuse to leave. Is this normal?

Is there something on my face that nobody is telling me about? Do things like this happen to other people? I honestly don't know what to do. This can be really nerve-racking sometimes. And it's been giving me anxiety about going out in public since high school. I'm in college now.

Can anybody give me advice?

>>17809582
This sounds like a troll post designed to try to make guys with actual trouble talking to girls even more anxious.

Will I ever find anyone if I'm depressed

>>17809336
I was sure he was the one after talking to him for 15 minutes.
I remember listening to him talk about politics, feeling warmth in my chest and thinking "I am such a big, stupid shithead if I don't marry this guy".
I liked him more and more with time, but it was really strong from the beginning.

I feel the same way you do - if I don't feel instantly attracted I don't pursue them.

>>17809292
could be they are legitimately not doing their job?

>>17809597
Are you a guy? If you're a guy with depression, confidence or self-esteem issues then you'll be alone your whole life most likely. If you're a woman then no you'll find someone easy.

>>17809424
>If a guy has a flirty personality, would he flirt with someone he's not attracted to?

Sure. Especially if he feels particularly close or affectionate/friendly towards you.

I''m typically pretty flirty with everyone, but i'm particularly flirty with two women (besides my girlfriend). The first is my best friend. She's gay. I'm flirty with her (say nice things, have more physical contact, check in on her) because I think well of her, am more open with her, and am just comfortable around her.

The second is another girl who I think of like a little sister. For her I will specifically say flirty things because I know sometimes it's something she needs to hear, because I know a little flattery here or a kind word there can make her smile, and she's someone whose well being I genuinely care about.

I don't have any romantic or sexual intentions for either of them (or any other women really--and to be honest HAS created some misunderstandings in the past, particularly while I was dating, and I didn't even realize i was being flirty until it blew up in my face a couple times), and I'm "flirty" with some guy friends who I'm particular close with too. For me, being flirty is just a form of communication--and when I'm flirting even more, it's a sign that I feel like i'm comfortable around them.

>>17809088
>>17809088
Ladies, this girl is living with me and my wife, she sleeps with us both we all sleep together in the same bed.... she plays a lot with me playful and stuff, touches me tickles me....but seems closer to my wife (they also work together)...wife picked her up we have been living together for about uh....a year now...she sleeps here most nights. My wife an I have been together for years.

How do i get the said girl to be more equal...giver her space or be pushy? my wife was pushy to get her.

(got rid of her BF and everything)

Females

Do you consider it cheating if your BF jerks off to cam girls often or at all?

>>17809699
Would you consider it cheating if your girlfriend cams with guys? Of course not. It's not cheating, but it's still unacceptable behaviour.

>>17809699
>Do you consider it cheating if your BF jerks off to cam girls often or at all?

Not a female... But I can tell you straight off the bat, a cam girl is probably basically about the same or a little worse level as you hiring a personal stripper for JUST yourself.

If your girlfriend is not cool having a stripper's attention on you, she's even less likely to be cool with you jerking it to a camgirl.

The difference between porn and something like a stripper or a cam girl is, you are not directly interacting with your pornography--it is basically pure fantasy, it is not something you can affect or influence. The same is not true for the other two.

Is it straight-up, full on cheating? Most people would say no, but that doesn't mean they wouldn't get pissed off at their SO's for doing it.

Everyone is different though. There are even couples--who aren't swingers--that think of full penetration "happy ending" services and prostitutes as not cheating, and consider of it as just extramarital services that are a part of their normal, fully functionally, and happy lives. It take all sorts.

Crush's birthday tomorrow. What should I say when wishing him happy birthday?

>>17809802
"Happy Birthday"

>>17809699
I don't consider it cheating as long as there is no interaction.
If it was some one-on-one thing and she did what he asked her to, then yes, it's cheating. If she did her thing without minding him it's basically porn and it is okay.

I'm always the boyfriend to a girl right after they have a shit boyfriend who was a terrible person. I am always judged and compared to their ex, I hate it, I am not that person, I am better, I treat you like your my sun and stars. I just wanna be able to do everything with you, but I can't because you're afraid I'm like him.

>>17809814
Girls like u to treat them soecial but also normal and also fairly which means harsh sometimes...beucause they know ur not going to put up with shit from others ir ur kids

>>17809871
wat

Why do women think it's acceptable to be late as long as they were doing something to make themselves look better?

>hey why were you a half an hour late
>oh I decided to do x for you

Do women just not realize that men would rather them look like a wreck and be on time than look like a princess and be 30 minutes late?

>>17809885
What's stopping you from saying "I would rather you look like a wreck and be on time than look like a princess and be 30 minutes late"?

>>17809699
Definately. Because a live person would be getting off to my bf and vice versa. Not acceptable in a relationship

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>Girls
Does your breasts really float when you're in the bathtub or swimming pool?

How realistic is it to continue a relationship post college graduation?

My and her hometowns are 10 hours away by car, so that's not particularly helpful. I don't want to just give up on her after graduation because she's really special to me and I think something could really work. Do I talk to her and see if she'd want to move in together somewhere after graduation?

>>17809699
Guy but if you have to ask if it's cheating, you probably shouldn't be doing it. Even if you can successfully argue it isnt cheating, it's still kind of iffy.

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guys/girls, do you consider it cheating if your SO is aware of you flirting/sharing porn/role playing with another person you share similar tastes with?

I have a friend who's in a committed relationship but recently started getting pretty flirty with me since I'm pretty open about my fetishes/watching porn. we both admit that we enjoy flirting because it's fun and makes us feel better

part of me thinks he's lying about his girlfriend being okay with this kind of talking; we've never touched and we only talk about porn, but recently he's started incorporating me into it. he claims his girlfriend's fine with it but man I feel so guilty because he seems to be liking me on an emotional level and that seems even worse imo.

should I back the fuck up? this is the first porn sharing buddy I've ever had (other women suck at it) and I love it.

we also go straight back to normal when we hang out, is this too dangerous to continue? I've never had the intention of going past rp

>>17809885
Sadly they really do not understand that. They are subhumans after all.

>>17809885
most women are only using it as an excuse and don't care one way or another if you get mad or not, they're going to get dressed up because they want to and if you get mad about it you're the bad guy. win/win :3

>>17810022
In fact they drag them down until they drown, that's why bikinis are so important.

>>17810037
To echo what I said earlier, its not cheating technically but it's definitely skeevy. You've definitely started dipping past the entire platonic line.

It seems like men hold themselves to a higher standard of fitness and aesthetics, do women actually care?

I need guidance from the femanons here.

Two weeks ago I met this girl, we made out and next week met again and slept together. We had a great time, went drinking, talked a lot, there was a degree of intimacy in her touch and her kisses. Before I left her apartment she suggested meeting again and later on in a text. I reciprocated.

Now I tend to develop feelings a bit too fast and this time I want to keep it a bit under control. However I like this girl and want to see her again and let things develop more naturally.

Which leads me to the question, how can I balance showing interest in her with not looking clingy? So far we have been texting every 2-3 days, although I'm almost always the one to initiate conversation. Is it ok to ask her to meet this weekend?

I really have no clue how to play it cool with a new girl and would appreciate any personal input I can get.

Thanks in advance.

>>17810067
Very much, their standards are arguably higher than ours.

There's a girl I like, no doubt she cares about me, and she likes me a lot, just not sure if there's anything romantic involved. At the same time she's got trust issues and doesn't want any relationships at all. Kept rejecting all the guys past 3 years, even those who are better looking and cooler than me, the ones she had known for longer time than me, etc.
Mutual friend says in his opinion there's a high chance she has feelings for me but doesn't want to admit it. I'm not sure about that, but I'm sure that if she has any, she indeed won't admit it. When he asked her why doesn't she want me, she said that she doesn't want to be in a relationship.
Is there anything I can do in this situation, besides of waiting to see if she changes her mind about relationships? I tried meeting other girls, ones that actually declared they're attracted to me, but it doesn't do the trick, I keep thinking about this one.

How would you feel if your gf would drop you saying "I have no more patience for this" because you were busy with education and didnt give her the attention she wanted?
I'm the gf...

>>17810135
Well, I'd be hurt she didn't have patience to discuss her needs with me. If I cared, I'd try to give her more attention if she expressed the problem to me

>>17810135
Breaking up is going to be hard on him no matter what, and in this case the reason itself is as good as any. The important thing is the way you deliver the news. Being harsh, blunt or simply indifferent while breaking up will make it a more traumatic experience for him.

Since you care enough to be asking for advice, I would dedicate some time to come up with a tactful execution.

>>17810034
Long distance works when there is a reasonable and planned goal to see each other again.

Is going to the ice rink that goes up around Christmas a good first date?
Incidentally, how do I ask a girl to go on a date with me?

>>17810135
What else would she expect, that I spend less time at the library and get a worse GPA because she's feeling needy? Actually had a chick try to get me to do something similar to that, and it's something I still find funny.

>>17809814
I'm sorry. :(
After spending so long fixing his problems, I'm only just now opening the can of worms that is my own psyche. I can see plain as day how different my ex was and am eternally grateful.
I tend to just say what's on my mind. I shouldn't really speak up when I'm thinking how horrible my ex was, though.

>>17809113
This would be a good fit with me because I am relatively relaxed about body hair/scent etc compared to what I read online. If my ex went to a concert I'd beg him to not shower before seeing me so I could lick off his sweat. Likewise I find it a big turn off if a guy is (to me) overly prissy about dealing with a human body, and for example expects me to hop in the shower before every single time his tongue gets near my pussy. It takes away from the passion/spontaneity and makes me feel like I am only sexy for the ~half hour after just being washed or something.

Having said that, I'm detailing because this is a compatibility issue and your preference happens to align really well with mine. There are other girls who would feel downright uncomfortable with having their boyfriend smell them without washing up first. It is simply a matter of subjective perception, when they start to "feel" dirty.

>>17809120
Other way around for me, I'm not exactly a sub but I love some firm spanking/smacking.

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Guys/Girls

How do I get over oneitis?

t. guy

>>17810157

Time, distance and keeping distracted with other things. Ultimately, hopefully, falling in love with someone else.

>>17809121
I used to be like this when I was quite young. I was inexperienced with human interaction and in my eyes was simply expressing affection and protective care for someone dear to me. It took me some years to develop an intuition for when something is... not exactly "too loving" but too romantic in vibe. There's a big chance that she'll look back on this and realize that she was handling it entirely the wrong way and you were right to get this impression.

Basically, you are right to feel wronged but I think it's more likely that she did it without realizing than that she consciously led you on.

Either way, keep it short and sweet. Send her a quick text or email saying that you are developing real feelings for her and need personal space to deal with moving on and accepting that she does not reciprocate your feelings. That you're not ready to see her as a friend and don't want to get in deeper, no hard feelings and you wish her the best.
This way you keep to your own feelings in a way that makes it extremely hard for you to argue your decision without being disrespectful and selfish.

Ignore literally everything she may send afterwards.

>>17809181
Yes.

>>17809292
Better odds that they'll roll over and take it as opposed to confronting him. Could be real sexism (some men just have such a negative perception of women that their every flaw legitimately seems much worse and impactful than male fuck ups) but could also just be opportunism.

>>17810143
I tried to discuss about it several times but it didn't work out, it stayed the same. That's why I ran out of patience. Each time he would tell me the same thing over and over again. I started to feel like he didn't like me anymore but didn't know how to say it or that he is just leaving the dirty job to me.

>>17810147
Yeah, I realized that my words were kinda harsh. I know I've hurt him and it makes me feel like shit. I wish I was less harsh.

>>17810153
I would never expect him to spend less time on studies so he can give me attention. That's just egoistical and childish.
It was a long distance relationship. He started to contact me less and less, like once/twice a week, usually on weekends, and when we would see each other on skype he was just distant.

>>17809334
>good at storytelling, good at listening
>obviously not invested in something romantic or sexual with me
>friendly

That's pretty much all. Not even mandatory, if a person has anything at all that interests me I am down for friendship in theory. How likely it is that we actually become friends depends on both practical circumstances (do we naturally see each other a lot, both have a lot of time etc) and just how well I get along with said person.

>>17809659
Can't really dictate how she feels about you. The odds that a random person is going to have exactly equal chemistry and compatibility with two halves of a couple is fairly slim. You can open up a conversation where you express that you'd like to be closer to her, but if that merits nothing you're out of moves and will have to reconsider whether you're still happy with this arrangement the way it currently is.

>>17809699
If there's no one on one interaction then no. If there is, it's kind of a grey area for me. Not nearly as bad as physical cheating but it's pretty trashy and if I found out my partner had hidden it from me it might be a dealbreaker depending on the rest of the relationship.

>>17810037
His girlfriend most definitely (or well, VERY likely) does not know about this. "Hey babe, I roleplay and sext with a sexually compatible friend, that okay with you?" isn't something most people find easy to bring up and for damn good reasons.

Also yes, I would consider it cheating.

>>17810067
Seems like that from what? The male uniform of jeans and an oversized t-shirt? Women spending an hour on make up a day vs men going out barefaced and typically not using creams for aging either? Men being overweight more often? Women habitually shaving most/all of their body hair off while men are happy leaving it be most of the time?

Or do you compare /fit/ to random girls you see on the street?

Making out with a girl from a club. She takes me to her place. We keep making out, but she says she doesnt want sex cause she is too drunk.

Can a girl be too drunk for sec or was it an excuse?

>>17810181

Of course she might have be too drunk for sex. Just being drunk might be enough to not make her not want sex because it impares all senses and makes it less fun. But even if it was an excuse, so what? Maybe she just didn't want to bang you.

>>17810068
Yeah, ask her to meet up this weekend, it's a fine timing. The thing is that you don't want to be clingy, but you also don't want a girl who is so lackluster about you that she takes any sign of being taken with her as off putting. You have to show your interest without going overboard with it and it sounds like you've done so just fine.

Some tips to "play it cool":
>leave the ball in her court sometimes (eg if you ask her to meet up and there's something she doesn't know yet - which restaurant, whether you should pick her up, what time - ask her to get back to it, give her chances to show that she's also involved and not just tolerating your courting
>obvious stuff: don't text her thrice in a row, don't do too couple-y things like good night texts just yet, be a bit flirty and extra friendly but otherwise normal in texting
>don't text her literally every day (as you haven't, props)
>don't be too afraid to disagree with her - if she gets offended by something you think is insane, you don't have to pretend like you see her point, don't go all out acting like something is funny when you don't find it funny... you can be extra enthusiastic to her without losing sight of what you actually think and feel

>>17810132
No. Give up and wait for another girl who makes you feel this way. It doesn't matter whether she has feelings for you - if she does, obviously her issues are so deep-rooted that you don't actually benefit from this at all. She doesn't want to date you. It is possible that one day she meets someone who manages to disarm or move her in such a way that she overcomes her problems (potentially along with the right timing, some more growing up), but right now you're not that guy so take your loss and try to move on.

>>17810151
Generally yaeh, sure, options to talk without pressure to talk. I wouldn't do it as a first date with someone you barely know, though, a bit too traditionally romantic for that. (Are you going to try to hold her hand? etc)

Just tell her something akin to "hey, I noticed you [good quality: eg "seem to really be on my wavelength", "seem like a really fun person"], would you like to get drinks together some time?"
Sure you can fuck up by doing a full on declaration of love or being douchey about it, but other than that the specific wording isn't some cheat code. Either she's interested or she isn't, all you can do is be polite and keep the request short and simple so you don't look overly invested.

>>17810181
Of course she can be.
Personally I'd really avoid drunk sex if at all possible because it's barely any fun to me, but I honestly wouldn't take someone home with me and then tell them I don't want to have sex, either.
But still, if she doesn't want to, she doesn't want to. Maybe give her a call the next day.

>>17810181
She didn't mean that she physically couldn't, she meant that she didn't want to. Maybe being too drunk was an excuse, maybe she meant that she was too wasted to feel really horny or that she was feeling a bit sick or whatever. All you need to know is that she wasn't interested in having sex at the time.

>>17810201
>>17810199
>>17810185


Another thing which was noticable, she was excusing a lot. Not only about no sex, but all kind of things.

"Sorry I have to kick you out so early"
"Sorry I am snoring at night"
"At least the bed is comfy, sorry we couldnt have sex"

She excused herself at least 15 times last night...

>>17810231
Maybe she felt shitty about not sleeping with you after inviting you over, who knows.
As I said, call her in a few days and see if she wants to meet you sober too.

>>17810231
I think she was really uncomfortable about bringing you home only to turn down sex. In theory that should all be fine and nothing without consent etc, but in practice plenty of guys would have been -seriously- pissed off and feeling led on and entitled to more than they're getting. Maybe she changed her mind last minute an was praying inwardly that you'd just be cool.

>>17810187
That's reassuring, I'll definitely keep your advice in mind.

Thanks a lot!

>>17810279
No problem at all, best of luck!

Girls

Could this theoretically explain why she is not responding?

>Could it be possible that she is nervous because the guy she is interested in is trying to get to know her more. So she kinda pushed it off for now until either she works up the nerve or something else?

>That could explain the EMT stuff as well. As she is comfortable talking about that, and knows that I have a real interest there as well.

Help with this anyone? 17810194

>>17810340
Fuck, mean this >>17810194

>>17810231
>>17810181
Sounds like she suddenly realized that she had just agreed to more than she could chew with a literal stranger. Hookups are fun in theory, but it's honestly super dangerous for a girl.

You're in a private, vulnerable place. If you wanted to, you could murderrape her. People can be very different during sex. When the hormones take over, people can make dumb instinctual decisions. Like inviting a guy home. Or a guy not really stopping when he sees that the girl is uncomfortable.

She doesn't know you. She doesn't know how you'll react to rejection. She's trying to damage control, cause she doesn't know if pissing you off will result in rape.

Don't take it personally. That's the whole point- she doesn't know YOU. All she sees is a stranger in her house. One who is likely stronger than her.

All she has is to appeal to your forgiveness and humanity. So she turned it to 11 to be safe.

I'd do the same, honestly.

But to specifically answer your question: can you be too drunk or was it an excuse?
She was too drunk to be able to have sex without second guessing her judgement.

>>17810340
>>17810345
If she isn't into you any more, it is her responsibility to turn you down when you initiate moving forward. So, instead of questioning her motives and possibly accidentally sabotaging yourself, just proceed as if she likes you.
You can't protect yourself from rejection, anon. You can only hope for the best.

>>17810157
Sadly there's no magic switch you can flip, life would be a lot easier otherwise. Just don't waste time bemoaning what happened and keep yourself busy.

>>17810167
>when we would see each other on skype he was just distant.
Sounds like education was just the scape goat then. It reads to me as if he was starting to lose interest in the relationship as time went on.

For women mostly..
if you invite a guy over your place, the two of you are alone there and you mention that you are really scared of getting raped.. is that invitation for the guy to force himself upon you?

similar question..
if you invite a guy to spend the night over in your place does it mean that you are down to fuck?

>>17810391
No
Maybe

>>17810391
>if you invite a guy over your place, the two of you are alone there and you mention that you are really scared of getting raped.. is that invitation for the guy to force himself upon you?

What mental leaps do you have to take in order to interpret it like this? Absolutely not.

>if you invite a guy to spend the night over in your place does it mean that you are down to fuck?
Context. Maybe yes, maybe no.

Is 5'10 short or okay? How can someone be 10/10 or 9/10 male?I'm talking about looks.

>>17810391
Agree with the second response, absolutely not. If anything she was probably trying to communicate without a doubt that she wasn't looking for any surprise moves.

Second question, for many women yes, but it's not a given. Depends on her age/life experience and specific experiences thus far. If she's used to male friends sleeping over without anything happening she could be naïve and think it implies less than it does to some others.

>>17810417
5'10 is okay for me, though it is because I am 5'5. It may be off-putting to a taller girl.
The second question is too broad, basically you need to have good genetics and be healthy. You probably can't reach 10/10 or 9/10 levels without simply being lucky, but you can still be attractive if you take care of yourself, ie. wear nice clothes, have a good haircut, exercise, have a good hygiene.

>>17810391
>the two of you are alone there and you mention that you are really scared of getting raped.. is that invitation for the guy to force himself upon you?
If a woman said this to me I'd probably figure I did something really bad that made her feel unsafe. How on earth do you think she wants to have some rape play sex?

>>17810417
Isn't that more or less average? I'm a country where average height is higher so I don't know what it's like in your region, but 5'10 is fine with me and I'm 5'9. Not everyone needs a big height gap, I prefer men around my own height for several reasons (though mostly sexual).

It's subjective. Universal cookie cutter of a hot guy would be: fit without bulging muscles (ottermode for example), youthful, taller than average, symmetrical face with a good jawline and cute smile, shoulders that make an inverted triangle with the slimmer hips, above average (but not huge) penis.
However different people are going to like different things. If you ask ten women to describe their personal 10/10 it's never going to match up neatly. Just like for some men a tiny redhead with AAs is a 10/10, and others think a voluptuous exotic older woman is the hottest it gets. Can't argue taste.

>>17810417
It's average, ish. I mean I won't pretend being relatively tall isnt generally a point in my favor but one of my more attractive friends is like 5'2" and is dating a guy maybe 5'3-4". It's hardly a death sentence, people just like a boogeyman to blame everything on.

>>17810323
Does this make logical sense possibly

>>17810463
It is -possible-, but it is a lot more likely that she's not enthusiastic about talking to you.

>>17810434
I can achieve ottermode or more of it like connor murhpy like physicue, benis is 13 cm although for some reason I don't really mind it.

My face is good I guess, I once posted my asburrger face photo on /soc/ people said I'm 7/10

So I guess I can be 9/10 if I work hard.

Also can you post your dream guy?

Girls and guys

At what ages does your sex drive start to die off?

>>17810486
I have no idea. I'm 23 and it shows no sign of stopping.

>>17810488

I'm 25, I really hope mine stops soon

>>17810493
Pretty much been consistent since I'm 15. I don't mind it though but oh well.

>>17810495

I mind it. It makes me depressed

>>17810469
Every other time I messaged her (Usually more impersonal) she would reply with lengthy replies, and mentioned that I plan to join my FD as an EMT. And when ever we spoke after, there would a focus on EMT stuff.

So, who knows really

>>17810498
Why?

>>17810478
Sure I'll post my dream guy but I don't think my taste is that exemplary when it comes to looks, mostly because I have a soft spot for chubbier men but here you go;

>as I mentioned, taller than me but similar height (one inch taller is ideal, two inches still pretty ideal)
>dark hair, dark eyes, dark thick eyebrows, cute smile and eyes (to me)
>bonus points for dimpled cheeks and ability to grow full facial hair, bonus points for the facial hair if it's a different color from the hair on his head
>LOVE body hair, no area or amount is too much
>perfect physique for me personally is a combination between skinnyfat and on the fit side... think strongfat but the light version, second favorite is just regular guy with a bit of pudge
>full head of hair is a bonus, especially if it's curly/very full
>dick in average realm, anything from 5 to 6", thickness is more important to me (no numbers because I find it trashy to ask, just talking about how it feels in my hand)
>nice voice (masculine, not nasal or too high, not monotone)
>good straight posture, relaxed body language
>smiles easily, expressive eyes/face

Much more importantly, other than appearance;
>kind
>affectionate both verbally and physically
>compatible with me in the bedroom
>wants to have kids and pets
>is into literature (all passionate interests/hobbies are positive, extra points for something I can relate to at least somewhat - which in practice means cultural rather than STEM type - but this is the big one)
>playful
>not easily angered
>respects himself, is not afraid to call me out on shit
>treats me like a partner, not his secretary or his queen
>puts in effort for my friends and family
>good conversationalist who enjoys both talking and listening, but can also feel comfortable being together in silence
>knows when to drop the damn phone

From the top of my head.

>>17810504

I'm frustrated. it's like I can't win. My body craves sex (I haven't touched a girl since I was 20 years old) but in my own free-mind I DON'T want to have sex. So it's 2 conflicting messages. It's so frustrating. and then fapping just makes things worse. Edging is ok, but if I fap and orgasm I feel really depressed. and it literally ruins my whole day

>>17810486

It doesn't, necessarily, if your habits are healthy. The reason why people of certain age tend to have less sex is due to circumstance and other things keeping them busy, rather than any physiological reasons making them feel less horny. At later age health reasons can affect sexual desires. But all the same sex drive in people doesn't "die off" ay any age. It may come and go due to circumstances, but humans are sexual beings throughout their lives.

>>17810502
Maybe she's not happy with the turn the conversations took?

>>17810507
>ability to grow full facial hair
>full head of hair

My hair is thinning badly and I can only grow a neckbeard

GAME OVER MAN

>>17810507
>>17810507
>as I mentioned, taller than me but similar height (one inch taller is ideal, two inches still pretty ideal)
check

>>dark hair, dark eyes, dark thick eyebrows, cute smile and eyes (to me)
check, altough not sure about smile.

>>bonus points for dimpled cheeks and ability to grow full facial hair, bonus points for the facial hair if it's a different color from the hair on his head
check but it's not thick

>>nice voice (masculine, not nasal or too high, not monotone)
check

>>good straight posture, relaxed body language
not sure

>smiles easily, expressive eyes/face
fuck

>>kind
only people who deserves it, there are way too many people take advantage of this trait

>>wants to have kids and pets
have cat but not kids

>>is into literature (all passionate interests/hobbies are positive, extra points for something I can relate to at least somewhat - which in practice means cultural rather than STEM type - but this is the big one)
check

>>playful
check

>>treats me like a partner, not his secretary or his queen
depends on the girl

>>good conversationalist who enjoys both talking and listening, but can also feel comfortable being together in silence
check

>>knows when to drop the damn phone
check

>>17810516


FUCK


god dammit

>>17810522
Dude, I've been with one guy and he was balding at twenty two and couldn't grow out facial hair beyond peach fuzz (which I still thought was great). I was describing my literal ideal, not the only kind of guy I find attractive ever. You should see some of the men who got me wet.

ok, didn't know these topics were a thing so i'll stop making my own.

anyway, girl i work with might be interested in me, but i can't tell to save my life. shes done a few things/talked to me about a few things that sorta make me think she might, like said "i can think of a few ways to make you loud" when people said i was quiet.

about a week ago she was really distant and standoffish to me since the day before i guess i ignored her. Then the next day she was back to normal.

so the other day she called me a 'silly goose' which makes no sense, cus i'm not a goose. idk why she said it either.

and then later that day i was purposely taking longer to do something and she laughed at me and said 'i can read you like a book anon, you can't hide anything from me' then laughed more, like ok.

>>17810519
Maybe. It could potentially be that she was hoping for me to guide it to be more personal, but never did?

She does present herself as the shy or socially anxious type. For what ever its worth

>>17810532
>I was describing my literal ideal, not the only kind of guy I find attractive ever.
If ya aint first ya last

But more seriously it just bugs me because my hair used to be one of my defining traits, now I'm contemplating a buzz cut or something.

>>17810516
I don't really believe you that that is true across the board. Particularly for women, it isn't biologically necessary for her to continue having sex after she is no longer of breeding age.

>>17810533
>so the other day she called me a 'silly goose' which makes no sense, cus i'm not a goose. idk why she said it either.
lol

>>17810534
I'm not trying to be obnoxious about this and what you say is not impossible. But you've got to realize that she sends you signs that she's not interested (not replying, specifically with the timing that she stopped responding as you grew more personal). Perhaps yeah, there's something going on with her that makes her give signals that are contradicting what she really wants. But you cannot just assume that she wants the opposite of what she's implying in her communication with you.

Basically, don't become >>17810391.

>>17810535
Nah I hear you, that must suck. At least when other men start to bald and be self conscious about it, trying all the flimsy stuff like comb-overs, you'll already be fully comfortable and confident about it.

>>17810533
She might be just friendly and comfortable making off color jokes. Or she wants to slob your knob. We can't read her mind. Generally, it doesn't matter, cause you shouldn't date coworkers.

Do women get wet randomly like we have random boners?

Do you think that a girl is a slob if she wears no make-up?

>>17810539
I know. The thing is that signs still show up that signal some interest though.

Some are kinda typical signs of interest, especially if they come from a shy girl.

And yea, I am by no means gonna turn into that guy you mentioned

>>17810546
If I do, I can't tell. It's not like I can pull my pants down and check

>>17810547
Not at all. It's the other way around actually, when I see women without it on the street I assume she's going or returning from her job, which is more important than having a face like a impressionist painting.

>>17810546
Yeah but oftentimes I don't really notice it. Like it's not as pressing of an issue most of the time as I imagine boners are.

Hey there /adv/,

Just broke up with my gf recently and I'm talking to this qt now. How soon is too soon? Should I lie low first? I'm guessing the ex would feel turrble if she found out about this. Should I wait longer? Or should I just not give a fuck? P. hard not too though.

Shadilay, pepe.

>>17810546
Getting wet is also the vagina's way of cleaning itself. Called discharge. So it happens. Kinda annoying. When it comes out a bunch at once, feels like I peed my pants.

>>17810567
How long has it been?

>>17810571
What. Are you sure that such amount of discharge is normal? That has never happened to me.

>>17810551
>>17810564
I see, unfortunately you can't not notice the boner. It did put me in an embarrassing situation once or twice.

>>17810546
I do. Not full on throbbing drenched out of nowhere, but I feel the sort of tenseness and sensitivity. I work a phone job now and the other day I wore a skirt and realized I managed to stain my chair despite wearing a pantyliner... all because of sitting cross legged, some customer low key teasing me, and thinking my coworker was kind of attractive. It didn't even get to the point where I was necessarily distracted from my work.

>>17810581
Other anon, can confirm, this happens to me as well. Feels like a clot. Never felt like I had copious amounts of discharge at all.

>>17810571
Really? Wow I don't get that wet unless I actively try to

>>17810550
Also, in the past we have had conversations that became a bit more personal through a natural progrssion.

The last message I sent was more straight to the point than anything else I think, and she just didn't know where to start?

>>17810157
It never goes away you're in for life famalam

>>17810606
It's possible, you have been in the situation so you know more about every nuance of the situation than I do. I just wanted to express some caution but it seems you're aware that she might feel either way.

>>17810617
Yea, I realize it could be either way.

Always a bit more difficult dealing with shy individuals. Especially when I am one as well.

>>17810576
Over a month ago

>>17810584
Sounds awful. No wonder you guys are so paranoid

My boyfriend goes to school and I stay home preparing for grad school. When he comes home, he is stressed. When he comes home, I'm excited.

He wants time alone. I want time with him. I don't know what to do. I feel hurt, but I understand he needs alone time.

I'm confused. When I was working and only came home on the weekends he would say how lonely he is. Now, I'm home everyday and he says he needs alone time.

>>17810567
You should wait until you are ready not until you think your ex is ready. Who cares what they think? They are your ex for a reason.

My boyfriend so often ignores me when I try to talk to him. He also doesn't do things he promises to do. We had a $100 fee if we didn't do something this morning, he promised to do it since I did it the last 6 times or so. It can take hours and I've done it when I'm really busy. He's always too "busy" to do things even though he's always just playing games and shitposting. He refused to wake up to do what he promised, I asked if he was going to do it and he just said "uuuh", I repeated the question like 5 times. Then like 10 times, becoming more annoyed. Then he got mad whe nI wouldn't take "uuuh" as an answer and was becoming annoyed, and he said I was mean. He stopped replying to everything I said, ignored everything because I was mean. I had no idea if he was going to go, but he was becoming way too late. I left to do it 7 hrs after he promised to, shortly before closing, because I don't want a $100 fine. We got a $200 fine over something similar around 6 months ago, I was away and he just didn't do it. Am I being a bitch about this? I feel like I always have to do everything.

>>17810645
>Who cares
Yeah but we're in the same social circle and is friends with a lot of my mates

>>17810175
that's what I think, he has self esteem issues and has been with her for years now and apparently she's not as responsive so i'm sure it's been for his pride. at the same time he crossed the line we'd set and now i'm thinking it's cheating lol

>>17810064

fuck you're right, he's been very sexual since and now he keeps talking about wanting to come over even though he says it's 'platonic'

fucking abort.

>>17810355
>>17810237
this 100x this

>>17810692
You'll never know what doors you'll unlock by giving it a try. You might develop a fetish for things like this if you don't have it already.

>>17810658
Why would they judge you for moving on?

Women, when you want space to think about your relationship and the guy gives it to you 100%. I mean never initiates any form of contact unless you do. Do you regret asking for it later?

>>17810724
It'd make me feel like he didn't care and therefore I'd feel more inclined to move on. I wouldn't regret it because if someone just stops talking to you completely like that it's a sign they're not that excited about you anyway, I'd feel like asking for space was a smart move. It'd make it easy to move on, no second doubts. Getting to know how someone truly feels.

>>17810724
I would regret it if they didn't ask how I was the next day. I want time to think, but not like a week. Maybe a whole day or two.

>>17810724
I'd be annoyed at their extreme overreaction, that's like saying "can we talk later" and they ignore you for 20 years

>>17810734
What the fuck? If I ask a guy for space, I expect him to respect my wishes and give me space. I'm not waiting for him to go against what I asked to "win me back" or some bullshit.

Now I'm not the kind of person to ask for "space" or "breaks" anyway, since I can do that on my own time. Y'know, saying I don't want to meet up cause I need some me time.
If I'm going to inform my boyfriend that I'm having second thoughts about the relationship, I'd do that in the process of starting a dialogue. I don't understand the point of telling him if you're not going to involve him.

I talked to this girl yesterday and got her number, so I texted her later in the day and got nothing. Nothing today either. I really don't understand women. Do any of you do this for any reason?

A girl gave me the "im busy" excuse when I asked her out, without suggesting another day/time.
Does this mean I should never try to ask her out again? Or should I maybe ask her for something more casual than a date?
Btw, yes, I'm also considering trying to date other girls.

>>17810761
Typically it's best to try twice.

Ladies
What are your thoughts when the guy offers to rim you while playing with your clit?

>>17810545
she also complains to me that she has no life and yesterday she was talking to another female coworker and when i walked near them they just stopped talking, looked at me, then walked away.

why not date coworkers? its not like we're in some office, it's just part time work.

>>17810785
Not a fan personally, but I doubt it'd earn you more than a "I'm not into that" response.

>>17810790
It's a strain on the relationship if you stay together, will distract you from your job, and possibly cost you your job when you break up.

>>17810785
Same >>17810794

I'd probably try it once if he was reallyinto it.

>>17810785
I don't like anything anal so I would reject it, but know deep down inside that guy will keep thinking about and asking me about it.

>>17810713
i already have a cuck fetish and so does he, that's why this is so dangerous and why i know he's probably lying about his gf being okay with it.

i'm fine with rp if he were single or if his gf were in on it for a threesome. i'm not okay with it and ruining a 5 year relationship

>>17810795
i'm not too worried about that. i'm mostly worried about whether or not she's into me :(

i can't tell and that's more distracting than actually dating her would be.

>>17810756
sometimes I give my number out because I like the guy, sometimes it's spur of the moment because I'm flirting and have no intention of actually following through. othertimes it's because I feel pressured into it and the guy seems desperate.

depends on a lot of things and how you presented yourself, so it might be impossible to know 100%

>>17810790
just because a job isn't important to you doesn't mean the job isn't important to her.

i used to get pissed off when people would flirt with me for 'just a part time job' when i was struggling to put my mom through chemo with work and using my college loans lol

>>17810817
>i can't tell and that's more distracting than actually dating her would be.
Haha no it's not

>>17810828
:( plz no bully, i get bullied enough already. the other day she said 'i'm gonna beat you up, anon'

>>17810827
>just because a job isn't important to you doesn't mean the job isn't important to her.
but dating a coworker doesnt automatically mean things are gonna go downhill. what if they work out really well?

>>17810785
I love having my ass eaten out. So great.

>>17810838
Shit, forgot that it was supposed to be a thought. I wouldn't really think anything other than, great, he's into this thing I enjoy.

>>17810823

I asked only one girl for her number

I think it was because she felt bad. Thanks alot for the feels.

>>17810837
>what if they work out really well?
Then you're gonna be lovebirds distracting each other at work

>>17810849
There are a few people dating eachother at work and they seem to do alright. What about her saying shed beat me up? Was it her being funny or actually saying she's gonna hurt me? Plz respond

>>17810751
Giving someone space doesn't have to mean not acknowledging or talking to them at all. You can give someone space while still talking to them occasionally and telling them you want them or trying to start some dialogue. Stop being a self-righteous cunt.

>>17810877
AS a guy who had a gf that needed some space, but we broke up for other factors.
Anon is right.
Some days we were talking at the end of the day, still lovey dovey.,

File: 1478224368645.jpg (21KB, 275x275px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 275x275px

Women

How long does it take a non-pregnant woman to start lactating like a pregnant woman from just straight up nipple play? Heard it was possible and was trying to get my GF to do it without her taking any drugs.

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3MB, 1080x1920px

For women (since they mostly have long hair)

I've been growing out my hair and have noticed a red spot around which ny hair is a bit thinner. Is this normal or should I be worried? My hair is quite thick otherwise.
It maybe looks worser than it is in pic since I'm parting my hair as much as I can but I'm still worried.

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>>17810394
>>17810400
>>17810423
>>17810433
>>17810539
I know it sounds weird as I put it but there were signs hinting at it all over the place, at least from my point of view.
For example the rape thing, it came out of no where. We were planning on watching movies that night and we were trying to decide what movies to watch, I mentioned that I would watch anything besides horror movies because I get scared a lot by them and then she mentioned that the only thing that really scares her is getting raped.. which given the circumstances is really weird, specially because she was the one that invited me, if she was scared I would force myself into her, why would she even invite me in the first place or even mention it?
We had already talked about things like how we lost our v-cards and she even mentioned that her role was "active" when it comes to sex, all of this months before the night over took place.
Other thing is that when I was laying on her bed, she was standing out and accidentally dropped something and she bend over instead of crouching (pic on the left instead of the right).. she was wearing a short dress and her back was facing me. She pretty much showed me everything in that instant.. I doubt a woman would do unintentionally.
Also we cuddle while watching movies.
We slept on the same bed but ultimately I didn't make any move because the rape thing was in my head the whole time and I didn't want to make things awkward.
The next morning we flirted a little but I decided she was just a cockteaser and I leave only 15 minutes after I wake up. she was thinking on preparing breakfast and I leave before she could even start doing so. I fapped furiously when I got home tho.
So that's where my questions come from, she pretty much stopped talking to me after the fact and I don't know why is she mad at me for.
Did she want me to initiate something?
if she wanted it why didn't she initiate herself?
Did I fuck up?
women are complicated.
me 25M she 30F

>>17809120
My girlfriend is a switch but has a huge spanking fetish

>>17810845
i'm not here to sugar coat things but
not all woman are going to respond the same way and it's almost impossible for you to know what she was feeling so don't be too hard on yourself

>>17810877
>>17810882
Well in that case, they should discuss what "space" means.

>>17810930
looks like a pimple, hair gathers a lot of oils in it. could be an infected follicle, only way to know is to go get it checked and not diagnosed on the internet

>>17810856
She's being cute. Just like how "silly goose" is just a cute nickname. No different than "lucky duck" or "teddy bear"

>>17810823
I thought I did alright for my first time. I talked to her about stuff from class, and then asked her for her number before I left. She seemed cool about it, but I guess she changed her mind. Oh well. I'm still happy I did it. It felt good.

>>17810627
I wonder what I should do?

Maybe wait till her Birthday, and message her Happy B-Day, then maybe try getting a little more personal with convo. Well guide it that way at least? Will probably be EMS related anyway

>>17810967
>She's being cute
is that good or bad? like is it a sign she's interested?

>>17809088
SO I was planning to go out with a girl I kinda like, she has a boyfriend, she's like super shy so I'm her only friend atm.
And when we were planning that she asked me if she should tell her boyfriend
I'm dense af so I'm maybe a big retard but does this mean anything more than what it means?
(her relationship with her bf is pretty shit atm)

>>17810949
Women are much me subtle than men. She might've been giving you some signal to take it to the next level, not necessarily sex though. Your actions have porosity been interpreted a rejection. How long ago was this? Reach out to her again and start over. Set the record straight with her. Only one way to find out, anon

>>17811083
Over a year ago.
I did try approach her multiple times and she always gave me bullshit reasons not to meet up again. ("I got visitors", "I have to study", yadda yadda) And Pretty much I was always the one initiating communication there after (over two months), so I just got the hint and stopped trying to talk to her all together.

Don't really want to talk to her at this point because honestly my only interest in her is under her pants.

But I still wonder, if I had made a move back then, would I at least gotten a fwb?
I might never know.

Almost 30, male, diagnosed asperger case.

I've lived with my roommate for the last year and a half, and on-and-off, she and I have tried to see if we can be a couple. It hasn't worked.

I fell asleep during foreplay a few weeks ago and it's been something she's holding against me. We've sorted out a lot of individual hurdles, and she's helped me with a lot of "how to be normal" things about life, but the closer we get, the more it feels like we're never going to be romantically compatible with each other.

I'm footing most of the bills, and she is clinically depressive. That second one, more than anything is one of the main reasons I've stayed with her as I feel it would weigh on my conscience to up and leave, yet I feel the longer I do stay, the more it will hurt when things do go south, especially since we both want different things in life.

How do I convince her it's for the best for us to have some space to ourselves? Still remain friends, just not her living with me covering the rent? Or barring that, what's the best way to gtfo?

>>17810991
Good or neutral. She likes you, but we can't know if it's more than as a friend.

>>17811163
There's no easy way to break up :(
Just be calm. Don't yell, don't accuse, even if she does. Don't use it as an opportunity to say how awful she is. Stick to
>you want different things in life
>you are different people
>it's for the best

Don't stay with someone out of pity

>>17811027
I think she's trying to get you to reveal your cards
"Are you trying to initiate an affair?"

Are you?

Messaged a girl asking if she'd like to do something this weekend.

We've hung out before, and i'd like to just catch up with her before the new year, not trying to make it a date.

She asked me how one my trips went and told me that she would message me after work, but she hasn't yet.

Do i assume she doesn't want to hang out. Am i overthinking this. I feel like i'm probably overthinking this.

>>17811250
>Do i assume she doesn't want to hang out. Am i overthinking this. I feel like i'm probably overthinking this.
most likely, yeah. Overthinking a little bit can't hurt, but doing it too much isn't good. sounds easier said than done and i have this problem too. it sucks.

>>17811204
>Good or neutral. She likes you, but we can't know if it's more than as a friend.
one last thing ive noticed she does. we talk about movies at work, and were talking about seth rogen movies. anyway, i was complaining that i usually need to watch on my laptop, and she was making fun of me saying she has a big tv and can sit comfortably on the couch instead of 'hunched over a computer' and how i'm a chump because of that.

>>17811250
>>17811260
also, to add to what i said - try not to think about it at all. i've been trying that lately and it makes talking in general a bit easier/less stressful. i find it's easier to fuck up when i'm thinking about how not to fuck things up. makes no sense, but what does?

>>17811219

I'm not into drama

I just want a serious relationship.

Do I have a chance?

>>17810985
Also this is why I believe that she may just be awkward

She has said that "I am just coming out of my shell"

And then this Shit she does or did towards me:

>She is shy, and kinda doesn't acknowledge me unless I say something, then we can talk for a good while without issue. This is even when it is just us standing next to each other before class.

>Does not initiate texts, but is willing to talk for hours with detailed replies once I get her going

>I have seen her looking at me from a distance, sometimes locking eyes. (Once even smiled at me)

>When I asked for her number, she took my phone and punched it in. (It was the actual number, obviously)

>When I asked her to grab lunch the first time, she said she was busy that weekend, so I offered up Monday, which she accepted

Should I text him?

>>17811371
Why not? What do you have to loose?

>>17811376
I don't know. I'll probably seem clingy/needy and lose him. It's an ex.

>>17811378
What were the terms of the split?

What we're you planning to say?

>>17809121
>Shes mad at me
Why

>>17811125
Don't bother then, move on. What's done is done. You can't change the past.

>Meet a guy who lives an hour away two months ago
>Drive to go on a date with him a month ago
>Constantly texting me, but he never will come visit me. I go to the same school he went to and invitied him to a few football games, its not that long of a drive

Am I being played by this guy

>>17810785
Dunno. Would say no for sure if I haven't taken a shower right before.

>>17811574
Anything more on the situation?

>>17811591

Not really. He seems to like me, hes texts suggest he does, in fact he even has a date planned for me when the semester ends where he lives. He just hasn't made any effort to come see me even though I know he can.

I mean, I met him when he was visiting here at a bar.

>>17811600
Honestly, I would say that he probably does like you, but rather have the first real date be on his terms. Might make him a little more comfortable. Just go with it and see how it goes from there

Any idea with this question and comment chain? >>17810323

Girls and guys

anyone here feel to uncomfortable in your own body so you don't feel like experiencing sex?

I don't feel comfortable at all, and even tho I have had girls try to sleep with me this past year, I can't do it. I just can't

>>17811354
She has a boyfriend. Have some self respect.

>>17811574
Why not invite him over to you?

>>17811260
>one last thing ive noticed
NONE of this can tell us for sure if she likes you or if she's just into you platonically. NOTHING.
Why are you telling us these things. It's super unnecessary.

>>17811649

I do, but he doesn't come.

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I really want to know if girls can feel their labia when they walk. Like does it grind against your thighs or pants?

This sounds like adolescent nonsense but I'm genuinely curious. My guess is no. Too tucked away

>>17811354
Yes, tell her that you want something serious and you like her.
It's not wrong to tell her your feelings, but don't pursue her and go on dates.

>>17811250
You are overthinking it. Send her a message tomorrow if she doesn't send you one today.

>>17811378
>lose him. It's an ex.
You already did.

>>17811679
I do, if I'm horny or shaved. Not just on average.

>>17811679

Well, yeah, in tight enough trousers for sure. For a while at least, but sensory adaptation sort of makes the feeling disappear as soon as clothes have been on for a while.

>>17811690
>>17811700
Figured as much. Thanks m8s

How big of a turn off is a "full time student"?
Right now I'm 19, I'm in college, living at home, and am having a hard time trying to find a part time job.
I feel like a leech right now. I try to cost my parents as little money as possible and so I really don't think I'd be happy about paying for dates with their cash.

>>17811720
Not as much as you think. If someone gives a shit that much they aren't worth spending time with

>>17811720

Other students will understand, they're in the same boat, more or less. Besides, you're 19, plenty of people your age are still financially dependent on their parents, so just date your age and you're fine.

Girls

Would you flirt with a.guy, even if you had a bf then? And under what circumstances?

>>17811760
Just for fun. Flirting isn't serious to me. Saying things like "You should come here more often" or "I bet you get this alot" just makes me feel desired. I don't care about the other guys, I have a loving boyfriend anyway.

>>17811760
Flirting is an ego boost for sad women. I've maybe flirted a few times with guys I'm not with but it literally was only because i either didn't give a shit about him and he knew that b/c we were casual or because I was so fucking miserable that I just needed some sort of positive attention and never got it. Never in person tho and never anything explicit or promising - more like preening and extra (indiscriminate) attention on males.

>>17811778
With this girl, it's every time I see her, no matter the gap from the last time

>>17811776
I guess, but also asking people about me? Kinda odd

>>17811760

Flirting is such a vague concept. Yes, I still smile at other guys, even tease them and complement them if it's due, even though I have a boyfriend I love. Do I do it with the intention of hitting on them? No, it's just easy and happens. Nor do I mind it if my bf does it with other girl. I like showhing him off.

>>17811788
Refer to >>17811786 for a few more bits if info about this girl

Girls (who are submissive in bed aka the majority)

Do you sometimes want your bf to behave "dominant" around you even outside the bedroom? Like telling you what to do, grab your body when he wants, give a spank on the ass etc?

So I left some dirty socks on the kitchen table in my uni accommodation and a girl I have a slight crush on (she has a boyfriend, maybe she likes me?) got really angry with me. Is her anger justified? Cleaners are coming tomorrow and the rest of the kitchen is a mess.

>>17811786
>asking people about me?
Who is asking what?

>>17811828

Dirty socks on a kitchen table are basically the same as putting your feet there. People eat at kitchen tables, who'd want to sniff someone's smelly feet while eating? Having cleaners and living in a mess don't excuse bad manners and nasty habits.

>>17811832
The girl who seems to be flirting asks family and friends about me.

Hand she has said I'm "perfect"

For the girls

I have no relationship experience with girls at all, i know how to thrust myself into social situations and how to make friends with anyone but i dont know how to go about asking out a girl i like where to really begin. how do i present myself as not just a big doof of a guy?

>>17811822
Hmm, well for me it's a bit of a spectrum. I think a lot of people confuse confidence for dominance, and it makes sense to some degree, since its hard to truly be dominant without being confident as well. But outside the bedroom, confidence and individuality goes further than what I would call dominance.

For me, I really get into the sub mode in bed, however I am all around submissive as well. But I'm not a complete push over ether. For example, outside sexy talk and fucking, if my bf tried to legitimately tell me what to do I'd probably laugh at him and tell him to fuck off. But I don't mind (actually I prefer) him taking the lead in most situations. It's not so much that he's telling me "We're going to eat at a steak house tonight, you have no say in it I'm dragging you with me", its more that he's saying "I wanna eat at a steak house tonight, wanna come with?" I still can say yes or no, but I also don't have to try to think about where I would want to go. I'm just mostly a pretty passive person, I'm down for almost anything but I can never really think of anything to do so I just go along for the ride with others.
9 times outta 10, I'll just follow him around and do what he wants. But theres still that night every now and then where I really just don't want to do whatever it is he's doing so I'll take that option of saying no, and know that he'll respect that.

Basically, I like my men to lead me, but still value my opinion. Yeah, I love when my bf randomly decides he wants some and starts touching me, but he also knows that I have limits and boundaries and when to stop. (Though that bit still kinda ties into "the bedroom" imo.)

>>17811638

Anybody?

>>17811861
Well if you know how to make friends thats good, the first step of getting a girlfriend is getting girl friends. You start as friends, then you start getting more one on one time. Ask to hang out just the two of you, that alone will give her the hint you're interested. After a couple times, if you haven't already established some sort of confirmation this is not just 2 friends hanging out, then just tell her how ya feel or make a physical move.
The trick is to just flow casually and naturally from friendship to relationship. In my experience that jump shouldn't be, well, a jump at all. You should hardly even notice the change in your behaviors with one another. The more time you spend together, the closer you'll get, then you'll just need to confirm you are both romantically interested in one another. By that point though, I think it's basically a given. If she wasn't interested in you, she'd reject your advances along the way way before you reach that point. Don't think too hard, don't let the 4chan memes get ya, creating relationships is not that hard if you've got the social skills to make friends, it just takes a lot of time and patience that most of the AD/HD fags on here don't have the attention span for. It's not instantaneous, and it shouldn't be.

>>17811891
But if you become friend with a girl first you are in the friend zone and she's never gonna see you as a potential partner.

For the guys.

I (also a guy) am scared to lose my virginity. I have had plenty of opportunities but I still feel like too much of a kid to actually make the move. I'm 19 for the record, live with roommates and go to college. I also don't want to lose my virginity to some random chick because I feel like my first time should have some value.
Anyone else feel or felt like this?

>>17811901

This is one of the stupidest myths that circulate /adv/.

>>17811638
Chick here.
Yeah, this is pretty common for people with shit self esteems especially in the looks department. You're your own worst enemy, you project your insecurities so hard you genuinely believe that everyone must obviously think the same as you, regardless of if you have the cold hard evidence in front of you.

I used to be a whale, that's the stem of my body image issues. Even though I can fully admit I'm not anywhere near as fat as I used to be, I've still got some flub in places that are socially deemed not ok places for fat to be. I'm within a completely healthy weight, I still hit the gym to try to get rid of the leftover bs, but it's no easy feat. Belly fat is fucking stubborn as shit.
Therefore, I still feel incredibly inadequate. I've had people hit on me, cat call me, etc, and it does make me feel good about myself deep down, but there's still the little whisper in the back of my head telling me "they're mocking you. It's not a genuine compliment, they're lying"
It's relatively irrational. Yeah, I know that dudes will fuck just about anything and feed me whatever compliments they don't mean if they think it'll increase their odds of getting in me, but that's not going to be the case for all of them. At least some of them have got to not be the types that have standards so low that they genuinely don't care if they're fucking a pig in human skin, some of it's gotta be legit. But I still always feel like they're lying.

Anyway, I don't got much for how to fix it, other than putting sex on the back burner and seeking out an actual loving, emotional relationship with someone. I still even thought my last bf was lying to me when he said I was attractive from time to time, but not nearly as much so. I felt far more comfortable with him seeing my body than any rando off tinder who I knew I'd never see again after those quick 3 hours.

>>17811901
this>>17811909

Like for fucks sake they're called girlFRIENDs for a reason. You can't be in a relationship with someone you wouldn't consider your friend. Not a good one at least. And if you're only seeking essentially a fuck buddy/emotional sponge combo and not looking for true friendship and companionship out of your partner in the first place, then there's your first problem. You don't be friends with someone holding out hope that she'll let you fuck her at some point, and if she won't you don't want her in your life at all. Not every chick you make friends with will end up your gf, yeah. But if that's your only goal you're not actually making friends in the first place.

>>17811760
Nope. Never. Cheating is the single most nonredeemable quality in a person, and to me there's no such thing as "harmless flirting".

Now, I can't help that everyone interprets things differently. Some dudes think a chick so much as smiling at them is flirting. I just see that as being friendly. I always maintain a "friendly" distance from anyone I'm not dating. I stand far enough away from the people I'm talking to to insure they aren't within range of pulling anything. Usually they take the hint I'm not interested in anything more than casual friendly conversation.

In my book, if I were ever even tempted to flirt/cheat I'd just dump the dude I'm with immediately, since it's obvious our relationship is failing somewhere. Idk if I'd move on immediately, but I'd still leave him and let him know what was going on because if I cant put 100% into a relationship I don't think its fair to be in one at all.

>>17811679
Well, depends how long yours are. Of course if you're a porn star clam pussy you're probably not gonna feel much.
I'm pretty long myself, unfortunately because it turns off a lot of guys. Mine are long enough that they can get caught in the leg hole of my panties some times if they're pulled to the side or something, and when you sit down in tight pants in that state. Fuck. Pinched labia is a bitch.
But so long as nothings shifted weirdly like that, nah, I don't feel it much. If I'm on my period and wearing a thick pad I can feel that sometimes.

Girls

I matched with a girl on Tinder two weeks ago but have been out of town the past two weekends. Would it be weird to suddenly message her?

>>17811945
nah

>>17811914

>actual loving, emotional relationship with someone.

I can't do that either Tbh. I'm 5ft 10in (177.8cm) tall and 145lbs (65.77kg). So I'm a pretty thin dude. I fucking feel gross. But for some reason girls sometimes show interest in me, and a few have tried to have sex with me. But I always turn them down. Because I feel too gross to even be with them. I feel as if they are making a mistake. So I turn them down. I've been doing this every time the past 6 years.

>>17812000
what if you tried, y'know, going on some dates.
You don't have to commit to sex. Just date. Maybe get a girlfriend.

>>17812026

This is me >>17810601

I can't do it. I just don't feel comfortable

>>17812034
How long have you given yourself? How long have you grit through the uncomfortableness in order to see if it passes with time? What's the longest time you've spent with a girl?

>>17812047

I've never had a girlfriend before. I'm 25, but I've had girls show interest me over the years, but I've always had this feeling, so maybe 10 years I've been dealing with this

>>17812066
I suggest bearing through the uncomfortableness and just let yourself experience these things.

>>17812000
Then you need to just spend some time on yourself. You don't need to date you know? you can just be single for a while (or forever if that's what you want).
You just gotta decide what you want. Do you want to bang and/or be in a relationship with these chicks? Shut out of your mind their opinion for a minute, what do YOU want?
Once you do that, you can either continue turning them down because you don't want that, or you can make the attempt to take their word for it that they are indeed interested.

In the mean time, I suggest just doing some soul searching. Root out the cause of your insecurities, make a plan to fix what you can, learn to accept what you can't, and most importantly follow through. If you feel like your're too skinny, congrats, that's extremely easy to fix. Hit the gym, eat more. It's easier than the opposite lol. I find usually with body image issues, it's actually just the mask over the real internal issue. But once you rip off that mask you can get into the nitty gritty, Get your body as close to what you think is ideal as possible. Even slight progress will bump your self esteem just a little. What you gotta do from there is use that bump wisely, really ride it out to build upon it.

>>17812068

I just don't know...


>>17812069

Oh I spend most of my time by myself. I travel internationally alone, cook food alone, hike alone. The only time I'm around others is at work or occasionally I'll see friends a few times a month.

>If you feel like your're too skinny, congrats, that's extremely easy to fix. Hit the gym, eat

That's harder to do then it sounds. I quit going to the gym because it was bad for me.

>>17811786
>>17811760

Any more ideas?

>>17812083
It really isn't though, believe me, I've been there. Wallowed around in "woe is me, it's just impossible, way too hard to work on my body in any way, with any degree of success" mode for a long time too. Hit rock bottom eventually, it was literally down to kill myself or start working on my bod. Chose the latter. Low and behold, it was not anywhere near as hard as I made it out to be in my head. Lost 80lbs over the course of 3 years. It wasn't rapid, but slowly but surely my body was looking more and more ideal. And it helped a lot.
Am I cured? fuck no. I still look like a fat disgusting sack of shit, but I don't look like the worst fat disgusting sack of shit.

Anyway, all I can say is you'll have to hit that point eventually too. You can only help yourself if you're willing to. If there's a will theres a way, and if you're telling me there's no way, then all I see is a dude who has no will to change himself.

Ladies, what percentage of all the females you know that would give a really short guy (5'4" or below) a chance?

>>17812110

What I mean tho is I used to go to the gym, but it did more harm than good. I used to go the the gym to relieve stress. But in reality the gym made me MORE stressed. A LOT more. i had really bad anxiety for months, and I didn't realize until recently that those same months I was going to the gym often. I had a completed break down in September. after the break down my mind cleared. But thinking back, I really believe that the gym was making me more and more anxious, although I went as a intention to relieve my anxiety. I haven't been back since. And my anxiety hasn't come back

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So I was a little bitch and never ended up talking much to this cute girl who sits next to me in class (that class is over now); However, I see her around campus occasionally. She isn't much of a talker herself, so she is always heading somewhere and not hanging around.

When I do see her around campus, we usually smile at each other. How do I make the best of this situation? I can't imagine making her stop and talk to me more than just a "Hey how are you" without coming off as forceful. I don't want to ask her out just yet either.

Girls, have you ever had a sharp pain persist down there after having sex at a weird angle? Last time my girl and I fucked she was complaining about a sharp pain and couldn't have sex anymore.

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So I just told my exgirlfriend that I don't want to be her friend after we broke up,walked off and ran into her a bit later where she gave me the coldest yet sexiest look that if I weren't so finely tempered by 10,000 hentai doujins I would've jizzed in my pants right then and there only for her to text me about an hour later saying I can't be like that forever to which I did not respond

Ladies am I in that pussy or am I in that pussy?

I'm dating this woman. Now, I like her a lot, but she gets really nervous on dates, and as a consequence, tends to have a stressful experience instead of a good one.

Basically, she drops her spaghetti over and over, and gets pretty embarassed.

What can I do to make it easier for her?

>>17811905

Same here, 26 going on 27, haven't even kissed a girl.

>>17812209

You're in that pussy

So im a virgin, male. 23. Had two gfs and I'm not entirely insane. I like this girl at work. She's 19. Always found her attractive but now Im pretty sure I'd like to be in a relationship with her. Is it possible for a 23 year old virgin male to actually want a real relationship? Or is it my dick just telling me it's time? I don't want to bother if it's just my dick. I was a shut in for awhile but no real issues. Also not saving myself for marriage just dont want it to be a fling.

Girls,
My girlfriend is on friendly terms with her exes. A little while back one of them came into town (he lives in another state) and she went to see him. I was suspicious, so when she came back to my place I snooped on her phone. She told him that she loves him, and he responded in turn. Then there were a few texts about him being glad that they're still friends. I snooped a little more today and she texted him "I miss you."

Do you think she cheated on me with him? Or is that normal?

>>17812362
Not fucking normal. No easy way to tell you this man but it really doesn't matter at this point if she cheated on you physically or not

Tell her that her ex can have her and split

I see questions like this >>17812362 and i really don't understand if these guys are serious or just people who nothing going on in their lives and decide to come to 4chan post some fake bullshit to get replies because a reply on 4chan is the only accomplishment they can get in their lives.

What kind of retard asks if it's normal for his gf to text her ex who is a "friend" that she loves him and misses him?
Why does it matter at this point if she cheated on you or not?

Do you not love yourself? Do you not have self-respect?

Be a man once in your shitty life.

>>17812379
>>17812389

You're right. That's inexcusable. How can I confront her about this without letting her know I was looking at her phone?

>>17812423
"I don't like you constantly being in contact with your Ex's so I want to break up or promise me you cut this shit out"

Naturally she'll go with the first option. But if she doesn't pull the "I don't trust you line" and continue the break up from there.

>>17812116
I don't have a lot of friends, so I can't really make a proper judgement about other girls. However, I have been in an on-off relationship with a guy for about 7 years now. And he's right around that height of 5'4 or below.

I don't give a fuck about it, but I know that quite a few women do. *Shrug*

Everyone

I just masturbated and right after orgasm I have this feeling of guilt and regret. orgasm always makes me feel bad.

Anyone else experience this?

>>17812476
Sure. It comes from that inner voice that says "what you just did was gross," and you believing it.

Either stop doing it, or stop believing that voice.

>>17812423
Yeah man, if this is for real, it's over. Don't stay with her.

>>17811905
I have the same mentality bro. To me, my first time just had to be something special, not just some one night stand with a random girl.
Just keep calm and it'll come. Also, don't be nervous when a girl starts hinting at sex just because you're a virgin. Most of them find it cute, or so I've heard.

>>17812209
>if I weren't so finely tempered by 10,000 hentai doujins I would've jizzed in my pants
I lactually chuckled anon. Thanks for that.

>>17812219
That sounds cute as fuck anon, not gonna lie.
Where are you taking her on these dates? Is there a lot of people around or something like that? Because that would explain a lot.

Girls, if you're somewhat shy, how would you feel if a somewhat attractive but socially awkward kid came up to you before class and said hi?

QT in my class, usually she's there like 10-20 mins before class starts, I've talked to her a few times but it was pretty awkward, I'm not that good at holding conversations with people I don't know.

>>17810515
Fuck anon, I have the same thing.
I don't want sec or a relationship for that matter. I want to focus on my dream and improving myself. But every time I fap my whole day I'd ruined due to giving into the urges.

>>17812362
Can't say cheated. But def has an exit plan planned out. What I would do is pretend you didn't see shit and just end it with her immediately. The fact she said "I miss you" means she is in a transitional state where she is soon waiting to go back. <--- She found closure here with her ex. And you her current bf gives her reassurance that what she is doing as a female in the world is the novel thing at this point in her life. ---> She is rebounding hard WNBA style and it is sloppy. I've been there. End it immediately and cease all forms of contact. These are our future mothers we are dating. You see her patterns so why keep her in your life.

>>17812379
Disagree. Don't give any reason and just bounce. She will feel even more guilt and anxiety as weeks and months pass. Silence speaks volumes here.

>>17812389
Who cares if it is fake or not. We all bite threads. Think of this board as practice for more serious times in our own lives.

>>17812423
Confronting isn't gonna do anything but crumble your high ground herd.
>>17812434
Bad idea. This makes op seem like the bad guy by snooping. She sees her actions as harmless and will use this situation against op and gravitate towards her ex even more over time.

>>17812670
He should just completely drop her, cut contact and not say a word

But i doubt he will, it takes big balls and pride for that, things most 4channers lack

>>17812678
That's what I have done two times. It is for the better. I hope he sees this before it's too late. There is no chance this relationship will last.

>ex and I break up
>6 months later she gets a new boyfriend
>still love ex
>get a rebound girl to pass the time
>we're about to fuck
>find out she is a virgin
>she is in bed excited to fuck
>suddenly remember I still love my ex and am just using this girl to just fill the empitiness of her
>sympathize with her and don't want her first time to be with some guy who isn't devoted to her entirely
>I end the night short and don't fuck her

Thinking about ending things with rebound girl. Anyway did I do the right thing or should I have fucked her?

Dude here, I'm autistic and have dysphasia.

How does this affect dating girls.

Google dysphasia if you don't know what it is.

How to catch husband cheat me?
I think he sleep my relatives and friends when I not at my sexy how catch so I get his money?

>>17812703
Gonna put myself out there and say you made the right call there. Don't lead her on if she is expecting more than a casual relationship from you. Congrats on not being a shitlord.

Guys -

Bf was going on about a certain tool he wanted his work to purchase for him which would make his job easier. They haven't bothered because they're shit.

For xmas I was thinking of buying him this thing but I'm worried it's too practical and boring. He likes things that have a use and has something kinda similar but not as good quality or extensive.

Would you be happy if your gf got you a practical gift or would you prefer more interesting things unrelated to work? I've got him some other smaller things too.

>>17812639
That would be nice. As a shy girl i appreciate it when someone else takes the first step.
Just keep on trying i'm sure it will be less awkward soon

>>17812993
What's the tool

>>17813112

I dunno, some kind of screwdriver set? I know where to buy it and the type he needs, so there's no risk of it being wrong.

>>17812219
How long have you been dating?
Be warm and happy. Don't be worried or concerned, cause she'll pick up on that and drop more pasta. Continue showing her that you're having a good, calm time and eventually she'll relax.
Might take a couple months.

Am I clingy/needy for texting my ex bf like once every month?

>>17812986
>>17812703

I second this. Find another rebound girl that wants a casual thing.

>>17813632
Depends on what you text them.

>>17812660
What this dude said.

Why are you still with her? Why even hold on? Is it money? Are you broke and she pays for everything?

Or just sex? 'Cuz if it is either, just move on.

>>17813665
To chat a little bit mostly. I still like him, maybe he knows.

>>17813685
I wouldn't use the word clingy, maybe desperate? Why not just talk to all the other attractive, decent men that are available to you now?

>>17813685

It is a little bit clingy - is he seeing someone else/looking for a new partner? If so, you're kind of prolonging the inevitable. I would advise you to cut contact to allow you to get over it.

>>17812359
I was in a similar situation a while ago, though a few years older. I grew up conservative and even though I'm not the religious type like the rest of my family it left an impression because I've never been interested in casual sex. I've had a few relationships that started off promising but fell apart for one reason or another.

Then I met a girl at work and we started hanging out, just as friends at first. It escalated from there and now several months later we're moving in together. Thing is, while I went into this a virgin she's had several partners. Just no actual relationships since high school. I found out when I first met her that she'd given up on dating altogether and figured there was just something wrong with her since she couldn't ever get a relationship past hookups or casual sex.

So I have no sexual experience and she frankly has a lot. It was (and still is occasionally) intimidating and caused (and still does occasionally) me some performance anxiety but she's sweet and patient and has been understanding every step of the way.

So yes it's possible to form a real relationship even if you missed the boat for when you're supposed to lose your virginity by years. But it's not a guaranteed thing either.

I'm thinking about getting one of those little finger vibrators and surprising my girlfriend next time we get frisky. Like total surprise, not even let her know I have it until I'm already touching her.

Obviously everyone's different and blah blah blah but overall, good plan or bad?