advice

Do what countless other women have done for centuries and make yourself less attractive so that type won't be an issue.

>>17800486
you can't say you're attractive and not post pics. tits or gtfo.

>>17800495
lol thank u. i really have tho....i stopped wearing make up and i mean i still dress nice because it makes me happy but like what am i supposed to do look like a wreck?

>>17800486
If you seem overtly sexual or dress pretty sexually, tone it down. Ease into it in relationships and be a little hard to get in that kind of way and some others. If you put up a little resistance at the beginning of the relationship despite them knowing you like them, they'll assume that it would be even harder for another guy to come around or for you to even consider another guy if it's taken so long for you to really warm up to them.

I'm sure I explained that pretty shittily though.

>>17800503
u post urs or gtfo lmao. dont even right now im sad fr.....

>>17800507
no i get it....nothing starts like that...it always starts as friends...and they are usually shocked i like them as more (i really care less about looks, although i like taking care of myself) they assume that im just going to run off on them so distance themselves or try to keep me captive its weird but i have literally seen the same exact situation so many times

>>17800513
That's pretty strange. How are you socially then? Are you really confident and out going or pretty reserved and quiet?

>>17800517
im in between....im like friendly but def not full extrovert. ppl assume i am just stuck up tho. once i feel comfy with someone i talk a ton, everyone comments on my personality once they know me (which again i hate saying lol- like how are u so cool and pretty, ill never meet a girl like u again etc) like i feel like a fucking asshole being like hey im too perfect to be with anyone lol. but its literally what is going on. anyone i like assumes im just going to leave them for something better so they leave before "i would" or try to isolate me

>>17800526
Well I don't know what could help. It sounds like you've made a good effort to shake that image but it seems you've met a lot of insecure guys and a lot of assholes. Really the best I can say is that you will meet someone who is neither eventually. Maybe try and find someone outside of your usual circles? Like through hobbies and such. I met an ex at a music store since she liked a lot of what I liked, so something like that could be ideal.

Also one extra piece is don't always hang out around your guy friends a lot, insecure or not some guys can be a little uncomfortable with it. Do you have a lot of female friends?

>>17800486
Sounds like you're young, and that has a bigger effect on relationshits than being attractive.

Just chillax, do your own thing and worry about this shit later.

>>17800532
thanks. honestly i dont have a lot of either. i have a few guy friends that are just friends (like wouldnt fuck me if i wanted to friends lol) i know guys dont like this in general and they do too so they vanish when im talking to someone.
idk where to meet someone i havent everyone always assumes they cant compete with someone else no matter what i say.....like even if i say i dont like anyone but you i know they dont believe it.....i hate how all this sounds too. thanks for ur help

>>17800538
im not?? im 27 people tell me i look way younger but like i want to find someone i can be with and (maybe) have kids before my time is up lmao

>>17800552
How long do your relationships usually last before they get weird and run?

>>17800565
3-6 months but abusive ones always trying to contact me (i ignore and dont bring up to anyone tho)

>>17800599
Hmm. I guess one way is saying you don't date much and it's been a while since the last one. Making someone feel wanted and irreplaceable is what you need to do, which I don't doubt you try, but unfortunately you might need to lie a little and imply you don't feel a lot of self worth. It's a real bummer I know but it might be what you have to do to at least keep a guy around, at least in the beginning anyway.

Around the one year mark I'd be genuinely surprised if a guy still pulled the "you're too good for me" shit. I'm frankly surprised it's happened so much to you despite all your best efforts.

>>17800608
ughhh thanks this is it because i hate to lie. like i dont know what else to do tho...im gonna have to come off way insecure i guess...idk i hate this because i dont want to play games but like everyone assumes im going to hurt them or that im already playing games.

>>17800552
>have a few guy friends that are just friends (like wouldnt fuck me if i wanted to friends lol)

lmao good one

fuck off you stupid whore

>>17800653
I know it sucks but all the honest routes have failed. It's technically not a lie since you do have a fear of them leaving for some silly reason. It's not a major lie either, it's just on to help things along.

I hope it works out for you anon. I've been in the same situations before and it sucks.

>>17800662
thank u ...really....sorry to hear same. cuz no one gets it. ur right tho.....like i just felt like i had no options....idk in a way i feel like this will attract more guys who want to take advantage but there r like no other options i guess i can figure it out. ty

>>17800673
Well since you are usually friends with them first, I think you'd be able to figure out what kind of guy they are and if they'd be the sort to take advantage. If they are the sort to take advantage, you can leave them anytime. You don't have to stick around and take that.

>>17800679
>>
thats kind of my past tho....lately its been nice guys who leave before they get hurt even tho i wouldnt, like......idk they act like i dont have feelings and only they do. i keep trying to be like fuck guys n focus on me but i know thats not how i am or wanna be. idk how to convince anyone i just care about them.

>>17800683
I suppose the best way is to be as intimate and cuddly as possible, not over the top and in a claustrophobic way but enough to really show you care. Do some romantic things and do nice date nights, surprise him with stuff on occasion and that kind of thing.

Also sex can be a part too. Slow and sensual is what I'd regard more as making love than sex since it's a lot more intimate, my gf absolutely loves it like that. I don't mean do it like that all the time but just some times, slow and sensual really will give you both a feeling of connection.

>>17800691
thanks. at this point im in a weird mode, ill remember it for future though. i dont feel like theres no point to try with anyone and its sad lol. ty for ur help tho i wish u and ur gf the best

>>17800700
Thanks anon, I hope things work out for you too.

>>17800704
thank u

I say don't change how you behave, it seems like you've just fallen out of luck with the kinds of people you met, be thankful that atleast you have relationships some people on this site reach their 30's without touching a boob, in the end someone compatible will come but I don't think you're the problem so don't change..

if there doesn't seem to be anything in between abandoned and over possessive, its more likely something about your personality at work.

especially if the time window of your relationships can be clocked in weeks.

so lets get some common understanding. A guy will leave a relationship with what they consider a hot girl for these reasons: 1, they actually lost interest. 2, they are like you said low self esteem and figure they should get out before they get hurt. but the reasons for 2 can vary: they doubt your feelings are genuine or feel like they're being toyed with, they suspect you of cheating, they heard a rumor about you but are too afraid to confront you about it. and 3, they found someone else.

Sounds like you're way too needy and smothery and theyre telling you in a nice way.

>>17800486
Op i have a question for you since im here...
why do attractive girls hate well balanced but socially awkward men.

>>17800506
Yes.
Push the insecure ones a little, maybe one day you'll catch a winner like myself.
I tease. Take my advice. Don't settle for some prick.

>>17800486
As a fellow woman, I can say this problem is not because of your looks. Maybe the way you meet men (online dating?) or where you meet them attracts the type of men which have been disappointing you all your adult life. Shake it up. Meet guys through your non single friends and co-workers.

>>17800785
>well balanced but socially awkward
Not her but how does this even work? Sounds like bullshit in the line of "intelligent but lazy" or "I am not racist but I wouldn't want to work with a black guy"

>>17800826
You can be a well balanced person on the inside and not have the greatest social skills without falling into the spectrum of autism lol.

>>17800838
lol idk i tried dating all kinds of guys. most think i want to use them, hurt them, take advantage. i met guys all kinds of ways but like they always assume me to be wayyyyy more superficial then i am

File: 1471664880772.gif (859KB, 400x225px) Image search: [Google]

859KB, 400x225px

>>17800486
Maybe tell the guy your with to you know, not be so insecure? The insecure guy route seems better than being abused.

Really communication with men is key, if the guy is just a useless pussy then he's a useless pussy and there's nothing to be done about it, but if he's morally strong enough to respect that you want someone confident he'll rise to the challenge.

Men are unconsciously obsessed with bettering themselves, as well as taking on aspirations from their counterparts. This is men ideally though, not all of them, but a good amount do this.

In all honesty. Find men who have lots of friends, have lots of hobbies and interests, and have ambitions in life outside of work and relationships, and settle for nothing else. Those are usually a benchmark of quality people to love.

>>17800927
>In all honesty. Find men who have lots of friends, have lots of hobbies and interests, and have ambitions in life outside of work and relationships, and settle for nothing else. Those are usually a benchmark of quality people to love.
You also have to be good enough to get these men, remember that.

>>17800486
There is a middleground between insecure and abusive. It sucks that you haven't found it yet, but they're out there. I've had you're problem, but I found a guy who is just laid back and comfortable with himself and now we're expecting our first child.

It probably sounds cliche, but try not to get duscouraged and keep looking.

Maybe step out of your usual dating circles? Where do you normally meet these guys?

>>17800486
If shit like that happens all the time, it's related to your personality and choice of guys, not being attractive. Or you're stunningly unlucky, which is very, very unlikely.

What do you do with your life? Where do you meet guys? How many did you actually date? Where from?