Ask the opposite gender thread

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Guys

Would you choose a cute/innocent girl or a hot/sexy chick?

>>17781919
i would choose the one that had the better personality honestly, with a lean towards the hot/sexy one

not because of being hot/sexy, but because it's NOT cute/innocent. cute/innocent is cute and nice and all but it gets annoying when you have to teach them everything

>>17781925
Pretty much exactly this.

>>17781919
Choose for what? I think most men will agree that there's different girls for different things, just like women want different men for different things.

In most situations I will choose a cute/sexy chick, which is hot, by the way. "Innocent" chicks most of the time are innocent only as a facade and I dislike dishonest people.

Females

Is it a weird request for me to ask my female friends for help when looking for a girlfriend? My female friends are totally not collaborative at all and one of them even told me something like "find one yourself". Is it not normal amongst females to help each other to find a couple or do I just have shitty friends?

>>17781940
It takes a lot of fucking time and effort to do this. Plus, it's a reflection on them if you fuck up.

>>17781919
>Guys
>
>Would you prefer a physically attractive girl with a major positive trait
>or
>a very attractive girl with no positive traits

assuming no shenanigans

you tell me

>>17781948
>It takes a lot of fucking time and effort to do this.

Is it? How much effort do you need for doing the introductions if one of their friends, workmates, etc. is single and looking for a date? Men do it all the fucking time for their mates, we just know less girls so it's harder.

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Femanons, what's your nationality and is it seen as normal in your culture to date someone you have met at a bar. Had a discussion with a foreign (female) friend who said bars are only for ONS. I disagreed because in my country (Netherlands) it's very common to actually get in a serious relationship with someone you have met at a bar.

>>17781940
>Is it not normal amongst females to help each other to find a couple
it's not normal for SINGLE females to find their other single female friends a date before finding their own first

girls (but maybe guys can comment too)
Is true for you too that guys want a lot of sex only until they find a girl that wants a lot of sex?
and no, im not a slut. i only enjoy sex with the person i love. but sometimes he makes me feel like i am too sexual. it happens to someone else too?

>>17781919
Always go cute/ innocent in this. Might as well ask, "would you rather trust your partner or not"?

>>17781968
girls may have different tastes and helo each other without competition

>>17781919
cute/innocent all day, which for me is kid of a kink so it is hot/sexy too. I just can't stand the heavy makeup party piercing and tatoo girls. In my experience almost all of them are extremely boring and so reliant on good looks that they don't know how to be an interesting/fun person in a normal situation. What use is them "looking good" in the eyes of many people if I fall asleep just listening to them.

so I've been talking to this girl in the gym for about a month now, shes new there and we have similar goals in our training so we end up chatting a bunch. we had one instance where I found her to be really flirty, but also a few times where she was(admittedly) tired and rekt from work and I got nothing out of her

im completely smitten by her personality and intellect, and obviously attracted to her aswell

so she stumbled into me massaging a knot from my friends back in the gym and expressed interest in being part of that, so later after talking a little I ended up massaging her back for a while. her moans made me hngnggggggggggg badly

after I was done massaging her she said she can try massaging me some time too but doesnt know if shes strong enough(im big etc)

what do?
is she into me, given this information?

I get if this is a bit autistic. I am bad with women and very bad at subtle signals and shit like that

>>17781967
im italian and of course its normal!!

>>17781967
Italian. Met boyfriend at a bar, have been together for 4 years.

>>17781940
i think you have shitty friends!

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Everyone

>Text classmate it would be nice if she had some time for me meeting sometime for a beer or a coffee since she doesnt come with the group of class (she is kinda busy because sports and plays normally on friday which is the day we go out)
>She replies only to why she cant come with us and bla bla
>Totally ignores my meeting proposal

Do i pursue this girl or do i kill myself?

>>17781973
>DECENT girls have different tastes and help each other without competition

ftfy

>>17781967
What was the nationality of your friend?

>>17781979
Hah. Ciao!

>>17781994
Turkish

>>17781956
I'd go for the girl with the major positive trait. Unless it would clearly be a short term thing.

>>17781997
eheheh ciao e buonanotte!

>>17781968
They're all engaged except for one who is a bit autistic and imho seems to be asexual or something (but I didn't expect her to be the one helping to be honest. One is in an "open relationship", but she's not the one who made it open to be able to fuck around, so she's not looking for mates. All in all, I don't think any of them see me as a potential partner and vice versa, that's why we're friends to begin with.

>>17781985
Don't get it wrong, they're great at everything else, this is why it was so astounding for me to get those reactions.

May the fact that they think me as a promiscuous men (which is totally unjustified btw) be a factor?

>>17781972
This person is absolutely right!

Guys, I'm really confused.

I like this man quite a lot, and I've grown really comfortable with him over the time spent knowing him. We both have the same sense of humor and everything

But I'm really confused.

He really loves making innuendos, one even involving me, and I think it's really hilarious. We both laugh.

But, when /I/ make innuendos with him, there seems to be a 50/50 percent chance of him laughing really hard or getting uncomfortable.

What's the deal with that? I don't go too far with innuendos like he does sometimes (making a joke about spitting/swallowing and rough sex). The worst one I did was about porn and whiskey dick and he was weirded out.

He's so fuckin confusing.

>>17781999
Believe it or not, turkey is a way more prudish nation than any western european country. Even in cities like Istanbul. Of course she would be inclined to say she wouldn't date a dude she has just met in a pub.

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Do girls really like guys who play guitar??

>>17781977
>>17781977
girls pls ;-;

How do I approach a white girl...?

>>17781977
>subtle

>>17782020
I think you're right. However, then it surprises me that she says bars are for one night stands...

>>17781979
>>17781980
Good to hear you both have the same views. Such agreement may be the reason Dutch people like Italy :)

^^ Hurr Hurr.

>>17782021
i like them. but dont generalize

>>17782030
Prudish enough for not wanting to be couple with a dude who met in a pub, non-prudish enough to know that a bit of fun isn't bad.

Turkey is not Saudi Arabia and, if she talks with foreigners regularly, she's probably open minded. This near eastern urban open minded young adults are often weird because they act like a western person but still have token scruples that seem arbitrary for us.

Turks are the less weird of them all, really, consider yourself lucky.

>>17782017
i am a girl, but i also met a guy that used to do that. in your situation i would try to understand if he does it because of some hidden shyness or simply because he's a bit closeminded about girls wanting sex.

>>17782021
It's just a positive way to attract attention. Yes girls like that. It shows you have a passion and a skill, and with the guitar you can actually show it easily instad of just saying it.

It's a bit cliche so it won't work for girls who actively dislike cliches.

>>17782036
c'mon who wouldnt like italy. and italian girls.

>>17782046
She lives here though. But you're making a clear point. I honestly still find Turks weird haha.

>>17782017
I think you're hiting a nerve in some of those innuendos. It probably isn't about going too far (we dudes often like their girls doing that, shows you're comfortable so it's an ego boost). I think you're hiting on some of his insecurities about himself or about you and this ruins your jokes for him.

>>17782028
well i figured it wasnt that obvious since she has had some problems with her back that needed some work

I did tell her I have no massaging experience or education whatsoever though

>>17782061
Perhaps. I can see that being a possibility. He's veeeery insecure.

>>17782059
When you said foreigner, I took for granted she was born and raised in Turkey or at least his parents were.

Middle easteners who travel to the west don't really change their mindset that much. The young ones get drunk and laid more, but they will do that at home if they could. Young people love to get drunk and laid everywhere.

>>17782056
People who've been there usually speak about how good the ice cream is, or how crazy traffic is. I've only been to a more remote city on the east coast myself. Not a wealthy place but enjoyed my stay. Also know some Italians who studied here by using Erasmus.

>>17782070
Your assumption was correct. She was born and raised there. She was also almost offended when I say people judge by means of first impression (including looks) and when they rate that as a 'pass' (subconciously) they will go to the next step: personality. She immediately started out like "I do not rate the looks of my friends". Crazy... Cultural differences I guess.

>>17782072
about food: italians do it better!
about wealthy: depends on the city you're visiting. north and south are very different, too
about erasmus: i was an erasmus myself.

>>17782021
Doing something because you think it'll make girls like you is not going to be as attractive as doing something because you want to do that thing, even if that thing isn't traditionally 'cool'.

Its easy to spot someone who's just doing something to get attention. Mainly because they're mediocre at whatever it is they're trying to do.

What's a good idea for a date where beforehand you guys were already good friends and know eachother pretty well?

This is just the first time that we are dating. Dinner is not an option, neither is going out for drinks. (She doesn't want to do either).

I don't know what else that really leaves except for something such as the movie theatres (which I'm not a fan of) and just hanging out at each others places and watching movies (my place isn't an option (crazy family)), and I'm not entirely sure if she'd want me at hers.

Maybe that leaves something such as coffee? Though she said she would prefer to do something else, but when I asked what, she said she wants me to decide.

I don't know what to do

>>17781919
Obviously hot/sexy. Cute/innocent tend to be underage, at least mentally.

Also in your pic the left is the hot one while the right is the ... plastic one or something.

>>17781940
How do you even expect it to work? At best they can hook you up with some chicks they know but it's unlikely that one of them will be right for you and even more unlikely that she'll be into you.

>>17781969
Many guys who say that they want a lot sex barely had any, hence have no idea what a lot sex is, hence get overwhelmed once they get it.

>>17781989
Neither. Move the fuck on.

>>17782026
Grab them by the pussy.

>>17782095
Is there some activity she enjoys like ice skating, visiting a museum or whatever? Everything that she could do alone or with a group of friends works, really.

>>17782111
>How do you even expect it to work? At best they can hook you up with some chicks they know but it's unlikely that one of them will be right for you and even more unlikely that she'll be into you.

Then they could just say that? "I don't know any single girl" instead of "find one yourself"? Which is something they know I can do and I'm already doing so it's basically a "I won't help you"?

Also people gets hooked up and has dates that don't work all the time, there's no point on skipping the step when it could actually work. How are we supposed to know if we're into each other if we never meet because nobody does the introductions?

>>17782140
>"find one yourself"
Improves the chances that you find the right one, instead of getting some random sent your way.

Just picture how pathetic it'd sound for the girl they find "I couldn't get a gf, so I asked my friends to hook me up with some random girl and I got you"

>so it's basically a "I won't help you"
It's basically "there is no reasonable way for me to help you with a personal issue like that"

Ok girls i need some help. So this girl I got to knew this summer a lot more, was trying to become closer with me. We had a thing during this summer (cuddles sleep togeter making out this kind of shit) but then she acted like a bitch and we both decided to not talk to each other anymore. One month ago she tried to get closer but I was having some issues with my depression so I didn't bother to answer her messages or act like I did before. Also I had not yet forgot about the bitch move she did to me during the summer. 2 weeks ago I went to a party and we met there. We had lot of fun just like good old times. Ahe contacted me the eay later all happy asking how I was and shit. I had still problems with depression so I answered "good thx" and then didn't write anything else. Now 3 days ago I kind of solved those problems I had and I comtacted her but she seems mad and doesn't write like before anymore. So girls wtf is she thinking? Do I have a chance to still be friend with her like good old times? She is prob mad but will it pass? I really don't know how to act I have contacted her almost everyday like she did when I had this depression problem and I don't know wtf to do. Should I like go talk to her in person and solve everything or just understand wtf is going on?

>>17782150
What the fuck dude, it's perfectly normal for people to ask his friends this. Like, it happens all the time. You have several single friends of different gender and you introduce them to each other. How is it pathethic for the girl if she's literally in the same situation I am?

Is this a culture crash or something?

>>17782158
>You have several single friends of different gender and you introduce them to each other.
Because YOU think that it could work. Not because one of them begged you for a bf/gf.

>Is this a culture crash or something?
Yuropoor here, who knows.

Girls

What are some signals that you are not interested that guys may not realise?

>>17782174
Not a girl but a lot of my friends complain/laugh about when it comes to texting and the guy doesn't get a hint when they do the passivity routine of never asking questions and initiating conversations.

Guys: i fucked up and got really drunk at a party and made out with another dude and I'm 90% sure the guy I liked, Aaron, saw that. Aaron also knew I was really drunk. I'm just friends with aaron at this point, i think he might like me. nothing has happened yet but how badly did I fuck up and can I salvage this? I'm going to cut down on my drinking

>>17782166
>Because YOU think that it could work. Not because one of them begged you for a bf/gf.

You're supposed to know what of your friends may have something in common and which ones won't. If they both are your friends they probably have way more in common with each other than they have with random pub people anyways. You're making no sense in trying to make an absolutely reasonable request into some kind of weird begging.

Been spending a lot of time with a girl from college, she's in an online relationship with a guy she's never met.

She hasn't really mentioned that guy for a solid month, her and I keep getting closer. I feel like a dick for getting so close to a girl in a 'relationship'

I can't really see why I should feel guilty about splitting them up, when this guy hasn't even made the effort to come see her the entire time they've been dating.

>>17782226
Aaron is going to continue being friends with you, but probably won't date you anytime soon

This is because:
1. He'll assume you like this other guy anyway
2. He knows that if you drink, you're going to be prone to making out with dudes that's not him

If you wait like another couple months before you make your move, he might forget about it.

>>17782226
If you liked Aaron so much and he was there, why didn't you kiss some random dude instead of him?

This is something I'm asking you, but that's probably what Aaron will think too if he ever asks himself if you like him.

>>17782231
>You're supposed to know what of your friends may have something in common and which ones won't.
That was my point. If they didn't suggest anyone specific, the right person just doesn't exist in their friends cycle. Or they totally hate you (which is unlikely)

>If they both are your friends they probably have way more in common with each other than they have with random pub people anyways.
Not necessary. I have many different friends who wouldn't survive longer than one day together.

>>17782240
I was drunk and I just recently became friends with aaron (like this month, and we're coworkers on campus) so it's still new friendship territory and he was off talking to some other people. I was bored and horny I guess and the guy just came up to me, and I don't think I like drinking anymore. It makes me do self destructive things because I secretly don't believe that someone can actually like me i guess.

Girls,

How do you go about trying to get to know a shy/reserved/hard to read girl?

All genders.

What are your five best and five worst traits. Extra points for age.

>>17781919
Innocence is in the personality.

>>17782282
20, male.
Best.
1. Intelligence.
2. Compassion.
3. Charm.
4. Wits.
5. Willpower.

Worst:
1. I like being mean and being an asshole.
2. Quick temper.
3. Impatient.
4. Slightly narcissistic
5. Emotional problems.

Girls

If a girl is generally very shallow and sort of gold-diggery is it naive to think she will ever change?

>>17782349
Lol why would you need to be a girl to answer this. Fucking obviously yes its naive.

>>17782282
Male, 24

Best:
>Passionate about interests
>Funny
>Warm hearted
>Communicative
>Tomboyish

Worst:
>Petty
>Impatient
>Unaffectionate
>SJW
>Complex sexual hangups

Maybe got a bit too specific there, I've just come out of a relationship.

>>17782362
Could be there are girls who were very much like that before seeing the light as they got older. Personal experiences.

>been dating girl, im her first bf
>at the point where we make out but she doesn't really get handsy
>want to take it further

should I just text her "I want our relationship to be more intimate"

Alright so guys,

What would you consider a pretty nice christmas present from your girlfriend? I don't think he would appreciate any small personal/joke gifts, or well, he probably would but since he is planning to spend like 4000-5000 sek (roughly 430-540 USD) on my gifts, I feel like I kind of have to at least buy ONE nice gift.

His interests are gaming, working out, and other generic stuff, but I asked him and he doesn't want any things related to those interests since he has said he doesn't really need anything. Just FYI he has a pretty alright job so he has already bought everything he deemed necessary.

Sooo, any suggestions welcome

>>17782395
>I just text her

Is talking to people so hard in this day and age? Or you are going for sexting instead of actually touching each other?

>>17782399
Bone him

>>17782400
Yes, people have no social prowess of important conversations nowadays. All girls I've been with have always discussed their feelings via text before anything else. I prefer in person so I have actual cues to work off of and I don't need to guess.

Also not the guy you're responding to btw.

>>17782395
>"I want our relationship to be more intimate"

lol dude, no. Aside from that being one of the worst ways of putting it.. I know this sounds kind of cheesy but honestly, let it happen naturally. If she's shy/insecure, you're probably only gonna highlight those flaws in her mind by putting it into text, which minimizes your chance of getting sex pretty dramatically.

As a girl who was fairly nervous when it came to that kind of shit; don't expect her to make the first move, because she's not going to. Don't text her/talk about it. Show it. Of course, not in a rapey way, don't whip your dick out and expect her to jump on it, but like try it in baby steps, see if she responds positively to your advances. Hand under shirt, then move to pants etc.

I don't know if she's a virgin or not, and there's a myriad of reasons to refuse, like maybe she doesn't want to have sex without protection, maybe because she is religious and is waiting for marriage, I don't know her so I don't know. Either way, your intentions are out there, and if that's the outcomeyou can take the conversation from there.

>>17782446

He wants her to touch him more, though. How will she do that if they can't even talk about it?

Girls

Is a guy who is very musically involved seem less attractive/interesting or more attractive/interesting?

Girls, how does a guy possibly be friendly and imply he wants to be friends with a girl without seeming flirtatious?

>>17782441
Yes?
>>17782399
>and other generic stuff
Elaborate

>>17782457

I'm a guy but do you realize that question doesn't make any sense? Could you answer it the other way:

Is a GIRL who is very musically involved seem less attractive/interesting or more attractive/interesting?

See? It's stupid. People have personal opinions and different ways of showing their hobbies. A rock guitarist is not the same as a dancing fatso playing the Pan Flute during LARP sessions.

>>17782282
26, Male

Best
1.Patient
2.Autodidact
3.Sincere
4.Fair Judgement
5.Intelligence

Worst:
1.Unsympathetic
2.Overweight
3.Appearance
4.Weeb
5.Virgin

Guys,
Should I give up looking for a guy that doesn't watch/idolize pornography?

I have only ever been lied to about porn habits and have strong personal convictions that I lay out early on, but always stumble over racy picture messages, exes, porn tabs and lube that's never been for our personal playtime. I'd DO just about anything they'd watch, which is my personal reason for not 'indulging'/watching.

Why should I stop believing that it is objectification, and demoralizing?
Are there guys with morals enough to want to provide mutual security in a relationship? I probably could be convinced to understand or even watch, someday, but nobody has taken the time or been straight enough with me... Now I'm just super hateful and regretful of porn in general, and can't help but scorn sexed up women.
Help :(

>>17782399
Each man is a world.

That said, since he can buy anything and spent a shit ton of money on gifts, it seems the only thing he seems to need that you can give him is yourself. If he's into that you could plan something sexy/romantic for you both and spend the money on that. Like buy a stay on some place he would enjoy or something with wild sex night included. Maybe think about something special for that night (can't get into details since I don't know any of you two).

>>17782480
There's only one piece of cliche advice available to you and it's to look better. You're probably going to have to settle for a little less attractive than your current standards.

>>17782480
>watch/idolize

Those two are not the same thing. If you are so black and white about it, where watching is the same as idolizing, then you are always gonna be disappointed with guys.

>Are there guys with morals enough to want to provide mutual security in a relationship?

Again, watching porn is not such a huge character flaw as you re making it out to be. I mean, sure, you may not like it, but that doesn't mean anyone who watches porn is automatically incapable of of providing "security", whatever the hell you mean with that.

Get off your high horse.

>>17782480

i find porn pretty fucking shit but i also jerk off to it because i am a lonely faggot. we're out here it's just we're fuckin losers.

>>17782282
23, male.

>Best
Patient
Flexible to situation and context
Honest
Will give everything when it comes to do something
Funny

>Worst
Curious, not in a control-maniac way, just I like to know "why" of almsot everything.
Very direct. I don't like to go by the side.
Insecure.
Not empath with surround.
Very lazy sometimes.

Maybe you searched something short, but I think that are mine. I can explain further if you like it.

Also, I only see males replying lol

>>17781916
Why do you like trapping men in the friendzone?I hate you btw.

>>17782480
>Should I give up looking for a guy that doesn't idolize pornography?
No.

>Should I give up looking for a guy that doesn't watch pornography?
Probably.

By the way, on the subject of hating porn, it may be of your interest that amateur and even educational porn also exists. This, specially the second one, can hardly be objectification and demoralizing. There's also "porn for women" which is destined to adress your complains, which are not unique to you.

By the way, if you don't like men idealizing porn it's not a good idea to do anything they watch. The point is that porn isn't real life, right?

>>17782282
25

Best
1. Committed to learning, understanding and growing as a person.
2. I can art.
3. I can appreciate the qualities of most anything.
4. Very loyal.
5. Above average penis size.

Worst
1. A lot of unresolved issues to do with my father, race, class, empathy and general insecurities.
2. Work a pretty shitty job and I'm complacent in finding something better.
3. Suffer from intermittent depression and anxiety.
4. Pretty skinny with next to no interest in working out.
5. Easily agitated.

>>17782486
Look better, as in, focus on my appearance, or look better as in, choose a more reliable /trustworthy guy? The guys I typically go out with are honestly around 7/10 on the attractive scales, but I don't value people like that, I'm more interested in the whole character thing. Just, porn is always a huge conflict and I get pretty scorned/beat down about what I think.

>>17782480
>Should I give up looking for a guy that doesn't watch porn?
This day and age, I'll have to say yes. Porn is just too prevalent on the internet, and guys get introduced to it very early most times. But idolize? I find that one hard to believe. Porn is a fantasy, and having the real thing doesn't mean the fantasy just goes away forever. I would love to get my girlfriend to deep throat me for an hour and a half, but that's not going to happen in real life. That's what porn is for.
>Should I stop believing it's objectifying and demoralizing?
Yes. It just isn't that big of a deal. You're not a 24/7 cum receptacle, and we know that. You're taking it way more seriously than you should.
>no one has taken the time or been straight with me
It isn't something dudes go gabbing about at the drop of a hat, you know. They told you no because that's what they think they're supposed to say.

>>17782505
Choose a more reliable/trustworthy guy. You can tell a lot about them from their interests, from taste in music to their attitude towards things. Introverted guys will probably still watch porn but I doubt they care as much about sex than other types but everyone's different. Just saying you will NOT (I repeat) NOT find a guy that does not watch porn.

>>17782496
Because they just want to be friends?

>>17782505
Look for hippies, hipsters, etc. who are into deconstructing, progresiveness and shit. They will still like porn, but they will be against the objectification of women and say stuff like "I can't get horny with commercial porn, only amateur works for me".

t. Two of my best friends are active in a leftist political party and I hang around quite a lot with this kind of people

>>17782436
>implying I don't do that at least once a day

also inb4
>bone him in sexy lingerie

Already did that for his birthday, and continued to do so, so that wow-factor is kind of gone.

>>17782467
Yeah, I don't know. He's a pretty generic person interest-wise. He likes to draw, but it's pretty basic and he doesn't need any fancy stuff like expensive oil-paint or actual canvas. Just a regular pen and some paper. As far as music goes he's all over the place, and we live far away from the big concert venues in our country so that's out of my price range. He has a good PC, mostly all the games he wants to play, etc. He has pretty much every material thing related to his hobby.

>>17782484
His job isn't really that well-paying, he is an electrician, but since we live in a pretty spread-out area he has to work away from our home town, being away for 4 days and three nights out of the week, and as things are looking at the moment he probably will until christmas. I think the urge to spend so much money stems mostly from that he feels guilty about that. Nonetheless, good advice, thanks!

whats the chances of a relationship with a divorced guy working out?

>>17782524
is there anything special you want to do with him? Gifts don't always have to be bought, and it's obvious that you can't buy anything spectacular anyways since he's one of THOSE people. Something romantic? A short trip, a candlelight dinner, a stay in a ritzy hotel? Hard to think of without knowing you personally. Just fuck his brains out and you'll be fine, I don't think he'll expect anything big from you anyways.

>>17782524
>but since we live in a pretty spread-out area he has to work away from our home town, being away for 4 days and three nights out of the week, and as things are looking at the moment he probably will until christmas. I think the urge to spend so much money stems mostly from that he feels guilty about that

Then I think that my suggestion is even more valid. I've been on his place and when I have time for my girl I try to make it special. I would've loved if she was the one preparing a special thing, since women rarely do that due to the "men must take the lead" meme.

Give him the weekend in couple (long weekend if possible) of his life.

Is wishing an ex gf a merry Christmas a stupid idea or a nice gesture?

We broke up in July, ended on bad terms and only talked briefly once because we bumped into eachother on a dating site and it was kinda awkward/funny

I would love to be on speaking terms with her eventually but maybe it's just weak to use a holiday as an excuse. But maybe it's just nice. I'm not even sure I'll be able to stop myself doing it.

>>17782559
Are you single right now?

If you are, don't. She will think you're desperate and everything will be worst. I you're with another girl, go ahead. She may hate that too but then it's her problem.

>>17782533
We need more details about the divorce and the age of both of you.

In my experience divorced people gets along better with other divorced people, but they're able to build solid relationships.

>>17782376
Always thought tomboyish requires being female. Also how is SJW a negative trait unless you constantly bring the stuff up.

>>17782493
Somewhat more detailed is even better, just didn't expect too many people replying if the question was more complex. The gender distribution is not that surprising, there are simply more males in these threads.

>>17782502
How does #1 from positives and #4 from negatives work together? If you consider it a negative, one could expect that you'd work out and grow as a person.

If I tell a girl that I need to get to bed because I didn't get a lot of sleep and she texts me back "Good night ;)" shes probably trying to be flirty right?

>>17782579
>Always thought tomboyish requires being female
It does. He probably means he's a twink.

>>17782480
>Why should I stop believing that it is objectification, and demoralizing?
Because it's no more objectification than any other form of media. Would you complain about erotic fic? A basic book with formulaic characters?

>can't help but scorn sexed up women.
So you're basically jelly?

Though why you clearly got your own issues, it's understandable that you dislike guys lying to you ... which was a blessing in disguise that helps you to filter liars. Realistically you'd still need to differentiate from guys who watch porn and guys who objectify bitches, almost all do the former.

>>17782579
Yeah I meant that I'm male. Oops?
I kinda meant SJW to distinguish from just feminist. Like Gigi Engle or something. Somebody I couldn't debate with because they'd box me into a corner for being a man.

Girls and guys

Have you ever been so in love with someone, that when things ended, even tho you fully accept that you'll never be with them again and that things are over, you can not open up emotionally with anybody else?

I recently met a girl, I like her, and she's super into me. But I just can't feel emotional feelings toward her. Which is crazy because this girl is awesome, and we fit so well things should be perfect. Even my friends say we are meant for each other. But, I feel like my last girlfriend completely drained me of all emotion. I can't feel the feelings I used to experience with her with this new girl. when I think about my ex, I feel warm in my heart. But I 100% know things are over. 100%. We haven't even talked in 3 years.

What am I suppose to do?

How can I get laid nonstop with different women?

>>17782282
24, Male
Best traits;
-Inventive
-Budgetary necromancer
-Technically inclined
-Mechanically competent
-Punctual

Worst traits;
-Highly irritable
-Obnoxious procrastination
-Sedentary
-Solitary
-Unambitious

>>17782609

Be Chad

>>17782533
Met online. Didn't pry about the divorce. Seems really nice and super sweet. My guy friend says he's a bitch though and I don't see it because I haven't dated in a couple years. He never sugar coats his opinions of people either so now I'm weary. I'm 30 and guy is 33

>>17782575
See
>>17782624

>>17782615
chiseld abs with cash n big car?

I can't tell if I'm on the wrong track or if I'm just impatient. I've got my hobbies, my finances are in check and I'm saving, I'm where I want to be career wise and on track for the promotion I'll need in a couple years, I live in a nice place with good roommates and my life as a whole is starting to come together. Should I be doing more to meet people, or should I continue doing what I need to be doing and let what happens happen? I don't actually get out much but I save money this way.

24 male btw.

>>17782572
I'm single. Still trying to get myself to a point where I want to date again. Going back to online dating was a start but desu I'm not really ready to start anything new and I'm happy trying to improve myself. We just had a lot to talk about is all, similar interests and shit, and I miss it even if I do think we were incompatible.

Wouldn't that just look like I was deliberately getting in touch to flaunt my new girl? Her ex before me did exactly that and she didn't fall for that shit then.

My new girlfriend is chubby but she eats very little when we go on dates. When we went to dinner today she only ordered a small bowl of soup and some tea. I'm the first boyfriend she's had and we've been dating for a month now.

What I'm wondering is if she's eating less on dates because she's trying to lose weight now that she has a boyfriend, or if she's just trying to appear that way in front of me and goes back to bad eating habits afterwards. Which do you think is more likely? I want to know because her weight is the only barrier holding me back from enjoying the relationship fully.

>>17782698
cook something together instead of tossin money eating out

Me having a girlfriend feels wrong

>>17782698
Also she's self conscious eating in front of you so you don't think anything less of her lest she orders a full entree and inhales it. Probably eats shitty when alone and or at work. Whether it's binge eating, legit poor diet, depressed eating or a combo of all of the above. If you see yourself dating her a few months from now, start doing walks and physical activities together as you might be the confidence she needs to start working on herself

>>17782282
I was thinking about asking this in the car the other day. Ha. Good job, OP.

23.

Best
1. Curious
2. Resilient
3. Caring
4. Witty
5. Domestic

Worst
1. Arrogant
2. Never asks for help
3. Purposely annoying
4. Gets bored easily
5. Clumsy

Guy who got dumped three days after being made official here.

She asked if we could still be friends because she enjoyed our friendship. I said yes. I was sad and finally called her after a week. Called her what happened and she gave me a pretty reasonable answer. I said, why not give give this another try, but slower and without labels and that it was worth exploring. She said she'd think about it. An hour later, she calls me to tell me that she can't. I say that's fine. And then she says, one more thing you should know... I developed feelings for someone else. At this point, I'm not sad anymore. Or angry. I just go "Yeah, I'm not comfortable being friends with you" She sounded so disappointed. That felt fucking great, even though she lied to me the entire fucking time.

Is this what normal people do? I was talking to a friend about it and he said I dodged a massive fucking bullet.

Girls, would you leave somebody you have a strong emotional connection with because he let his body go? (became fat or really skinny or whatever)

>>17782841
If we are talking so skinny/fat that I couldn't be attracted to him anymore and he wouldn't do anything to fix it, then yeah, eventually, yeah.

Girls, do you like calling your partner "daddy"? Why?
Fellow guys, am I the only one who gets turned off by this?

>>17782887
I get way turned off by this as a guy.

>>17782887
No. Because I actually call my dad "daddy" and it makes me feel weird to think of my dad when someone is fucking me.

>>17782887
As a guy I find it pretty disgusting too.

>>17782836
Wish I followed through and not give it a second chance when she thought she could come back. Be cordial if she makes contact but ghost her otherwise

>>17782887

My girl does it, I don't mind. It doesnt particularly turn me on but it doesnt turn me off either.

>>17782887
As a male I get turned off because its disgusting

Ok, I'm drunk, so forgive me if this is discombobulated.
But I need to ask someone.

There's a woman I know.
I can't really describe this without sounding like a total beta bitch.
But anyways, we like have a total connection.
She has a boyfriend.
My friend actually.
I met her through him. He's great.
But he has his flaws.

Anyways, I'm rambling, but the last time we saw each other we got drunk and talked about some real shit.
Shit that I've always wanted to connect to with another person
When she saw me the first time this visit, she said that she didn't need to pretend around me.
Shit like that.

What am I getting at?
Anyways, should I tell her?
People are always saying that people should be expressive about their emotions.
I want to tell her that she's someone special for me and that we see the world so similarly that it may be the same.

I doubt it, of course.
I should just keep it all inside.
But fuck, I just want to express myself about how she's someone very special in my life.

I want to delete all this. Luckily I'm drunk enough to submit it.

>>17782920
Don't ruin a friendship for some pussy anon. I did that once and lost a good friend, a more loyal friend then she turned to be.

>>17782934
It's not about pussy, mate.

Like, more than with my friend, I felt like she understood what I am about
If she were a man, I'd want to be closer too

File: Girls Are Confusing.jpg (33KB, 500x200px)

33KB, 500x200px

Female friend of mine has been doing a lot of work for all of her classes lately and has been really stressed out and irritable. We were getting along quite fine up until about 2 weeks ago. Now she just brushes me off, says little, and is generally bitchy and gives me the cold shoulder. I know she's working hard and I know she's under pressure, but I'm just trying to be supportive and get her to lighten up. We both go to the same university and are in the same major, so I know how hard it can be. But I still make time for the people I care about.

I'm just trying to get her to lighten up and open up a little so she doesn't die young from stress, but she's just not having any of it. What do I do?

>Had to add the img for just a little humor.

>>17782896
Thanks man, that's what I'm planning on. I know she had no intention of contacting me again after me agreeing with being friends with her initially. So I doubt she will contact me again ever.

>>17782920
Was in this exact situation, we were friends for months. I had never had a gf prior btw..

Anyway, she would sometimes complain about her bf, who I was acquaintances before and I was in the friend group, but I grew to resent him over time not only because he was with this girl but because was a memespouting fuck.

Anyway, eventually I confessed and she had feelings too and we dated until I couldn't handle how obsessed she was with me and I had to break it off. Not to mention her rampant chronic anxiety took a toll on me

Also I have discovered that maybe I have major ADHD and I got bored very quickly.

So there, take your chance if you think it's worth it.

File: 1391403602399.jpg (51KB, 450x420px) Image search: [Google]

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What are some good places to go and meet women? I'm looking for a relationship, not hookups.

Ladies, what have you done to move a hookup to a relationship?

FEMALES

Do you find creative guys attractive (Musicians, painters, writers, etc) or is it just a stereotype?

>>17782983
Nothing of value lost

>>17783027
NO
The only men who attractive are those who can at least bench press their own weight

>Girls dont like dating co-workers
>Cashiers don't like being asked out
>Girls don't want to date people they're volunteering with
>Girls who join clubs just want to do club stuff and not get hit on
>online dating isn't very good

That's basically what i've gathered from the internet, so where CAN I meet girls, if I don't like the bar

>>17783027
some do some don't. What a dumb question. What were you expecting, YES ALL GIRLS UNANIMOUSLY LOVE X or Y

>>17782282
20, male
Best
1. Caring
2. Kind
3. Intelligent
4. Compassionate
5. Giving

Worst
1. Self-doubting
2. Depressive tendencies
3. Prone to overworking myself/expecting too much
4. Daydreamer
5. Conflict-avoidant

females,

why are you so hypergamous? why do you all have to go for chad irrespective of your own looks. I see chad with ugly girls all the time, i rarely see ugly guys with hot girls. I also see rage-inducing sights like a hot girl with a nigger on a daily basis, why do you hate nice guys so much

>>17782282
Interesting. I'll bite.

24
Best:
1) compassionate
2) thoughtful
3) polite
4) truthful
5) smart enough to go to college

Worst
1) Intense fear of failure
2) self-esteem lower than dirt
3) annoying, unattractive voice
4) inability to take any risks, socially or otherwise
5) inability to accept any compliments without somehow feeling like I'm being lied to

What I want more than anything is to list "hardworking/successful" in my "best" category, but I'd feel like that's a lie. Until I fix my rotten outlook on life and learn to enjoy making mistakes, I'll never get there.

>>17783108
Because nice guys aren't nice.

They're selfish losers who use the term nigger, they feel sorry for themselves, they whine they cry and they feel like the world owes them something. They have a pathetic victim complex that would turn ANYONE off. They're the type of guy to threaten suicide if you leave them, the type of guy to stalk you, the type of guy to want to marry you after the first date, the type of guy who's literally 0 fun and will agree with everything you say and change his opinion to match yours.

Sincerely, an ex NiceGuy

>>17783116
i meant nice guys as a joke, i actually mean sub 6 white males

your average 5/10 white female would fuck a dog before she would fuck a 5/10 white male

>>17783116
>>17783108
One last thing to add, a nice guy is the type of guy who will instead of changing whats wrong with him and working on himself he'll go and cry on a mongolian basket weaving forum

>>17782579
Then a few details I guess

>Flexible to situation and context
I discovered over the few relationship I had I can adapt and evolve quick, at least in a short-mid-term time to be by the side of the person I love, and I think it is very important matter since you always should be able to do little changes to be with that person in a best way possible.

>Will give everything when it comes to do something
This doesn't mean I'm a cuck (although I don't hate them lol) It is just I just can't "love a little" I either love at 120% or I don't "love" you (that means only friends). Which it is one of my best traits but also something that can develop on an issue in some kind of contexts.

>Curious, not in a control-maniac way, just I like to know "why" of almsot everything.
Pretty much which I said. I won't control you. I won't tell you "do this do that". But, for example, I only had long distance relationships, and I don't like to bother the other person, so I would like to know what are you doing. That means I would be glad to know "I'm studying" "I'm working" "I'm eating" but I'm okay with "I'm just busy" since I feel like if I try to reach you when you're doing that kind of things might be annoying for you. It is on "worst" since I found almost nobody understanding this in a positive way.

>Very direct. I don't like to go by the side
I don't like "not telling" something. We put, for example, you look bad with some shirt you choose. You can go "You could choose better shirt" "You look really bad on that" or "Mate you're shit dressed like that". 1st one is going by the side for me and 2nd one will be my choose 99% of time. Yet looks like nowadays nobody want to listen that kind of opinion EVEN if they asked for it. Then again, like previous point I put it on worst although I think is one of my best.

>Cont next post

>>17783123
Are you the same guy from a previous thread? The "average attractiveness males are truly suffering thing" sounds real familiar. We fuck what we're sexually attracted to, if you can't build sexual attraction through your looks alone you have to have a nice personality too. No one inherently deserves to get laid.

>>17782579
>>17783133

>Not empath with surround
I don't know where I have to stop some kind of jokes or shit like that. I don't know yet I don't want to be aware of that kind of context. Not in a teen way, of course, it has to be more on sincerity these days and people trying to give hints or innuendos about stopping or shit like that, instead of going "yo bro, maybe you should stop". So is 60-40 about not knowing not wanting to know.

On a side note about this, and for fun I guess, I only put two "rules" on my relationships:

>I don't get innuendos/hints, so I won't reply to them (last point)
>Everything will have to be talk if possible

I mean, you can even dump me if you want, just tell me why and we probably end soon in a good way. I tend to trust in the other person and I expect just that from the other one. I think I'm not being selfish or something "imposing" that kind of rule. I'm open to almost everything and I don't usually judge.

>>17781919
Girl answering, but let me just say that girls who go for the "hot sexy bad bitch" look are usually awful friends, if that tells you anything.

>>17781940
They may just think it's odd that you're actively searching for a girlfriend, I do. I've never looked for someone to be interested in, and don't know anyone who has.

>>17781967
American, and yes it's common but never a good relationship. They are definitely mostly for ONS. (shudder)

>>17781969
I've usually had a higher sex drive than my bfs. I think it's more that men are more comfortable looking for sex from girls they aren't dating, which makes them seem hornier, but myself and most women I know are just more modest and private about it.

>>17782021
Girls are attracted to any guys with an interesting skill. Musicians are attractive because they provide a good atmosphere, are usually intelligent and open, and are great performers and often very ambitious.

>>17783138
sluts have a moral obligation to pityfuck average/slightly below looking males, not solely chads. Girls have literally denied me a happy life, they're evil

>>17781919
whoever has the best personality
>>17782282
>passion for my hobbies, decent friend, funny, intelligent, good listener
>overweight, awkward to a point of quasi-autism, terrible at non-professional contact with women, too prideful to ask for help, lazy
>>17782480
there's such a small crossroad of guys that don't watch porn and guys that are "normal" where your search is setting you up for failure. it's great that you're willing to try a bunch of stuff with your partner, but there will be that day where you don't want to fuck: if porn's taboo, that puts you in a manipulative position
>>17782608
you can't force something that isn't happening. if you've certainly decided to never get with your ex, take some time to find "you" again and you'll have better luck making a connection with someone

Girls: What birth control do you use and how have you been finding it? Has it been 100% effective?

Gf is thinking of starting one but no idea which yet.

>>17783175
Nuvaring, it has been effective and I haven't noticed any side effects
I am considering switching to a longer lasting method though

Can I invite a female friend over for food without it being weird?

>>17783198
Did you really need to shove up to your cervix?
Because that scares me

>>17783205
You have to introduce it in the vagina, it's not harder than using a tampon
Take into account it has to stay there so you can take it out

>>17781967
As a brit who lives out here, that is mainly because you guys don't really do hookup culture.

When I came out here I found it insane that when it was time to take a girl home from a night club she would instead give her number and talk about going for a drink/date.

In the UK and a lot of other places, the only thing you would do with a girl you met in a club is have sex. And you never want to see her ever again afterwards.

>>17782887
Turns me of as a guy.
But if a spanish girl screams 'ai papi!' I lose my shit

>>17783204
I mean yes.
I have girls from college over all the time. It usually starts with a fight about who cooks better, or a decent sharing of recipes. Than i call them over to try a new one. Usually something sweet.

If however you want to invite a girl to your house and order food thats not the same thing. If you plan this just go out and eat.

>>17782698
>What I'm wondering is if she's eating less on dates because she's trying to lose weight now that she has a boyfriend, or if she's just trying to appear that way in front of me and goes back to bad eating habits afterwards.
Maybe a bit of both? I'm a guy but I'm trying to lose weight. While I generally make sure to consume less than my TDEE, I'll go an extra mile if I'm in a situation where I feel self conscious. It's kind of hard to say until you've seen her in her own environment.

>>17782480
What's so wrong about objectification? Women do the same thing when they look at a celebrity and gush about how hot he is. It's only a problem if you're just reducing someone to a sexual object when they want to be treated as a person. e.g. catcalling.

The fact is at some point you won't want to have sex but the guy will. So what options are there? Unenthusiastic sex, blue balls, or porn. I'd rather have nothing rather than the first one, and I'd rather get off when I want to do so. It's not about security to me but more to do with insecurity, as long as porn doesn't have an impact elsewhere.

>>17783239
No, I'm a decent cook as long as it's French or Italian.

Is it weird that a ridiculously good looking guy has no friend or gf at 26? I totally swooned when I saw him and he glanced at me, so I tried to get to know him, it seems he's doing math research in some prestigious institute and is giving talk in our uni, and apparently his cellphone has like 5 contacts, his mom, his dad, two names probably colleagues and me (saw his contact list when he added my number). He is almost always alone, even though a lot of girls in our uni look at him like they want to eat him up. He has no social media, I did some light stalking and the only thing I could find on him was his research papers and CV with one profile picture.

>>17783298
>>17783298
stick to your league you hypergamous slut, hope you get cancer

Girls: What is it you actually find attractive about the male body? I just don't understand how anyone can like anything about it.

As a side question, is it also true that women often like gay male porn?

Guys (or everyone, really) :
My bf won't have sex with me anymore because we both lack of natural lube and it hurts him too much when he try to penetrate me. His ex were always very wet and mine had precum so it was new for us. The "fake" lube won't work either, sex is always a chore even with it.

I often give him blowjobs and handjobs because I honestly love it and it aroused me, but it won't go down on me (I don't like it and he don't like to do it either).
I understand perfectly the matter but I have sexual needs too, I tried to repress them at first but it's here and I suffer from it. What do I do ?

How long does it normally take to fuck someone for the first time in a serious relationship? For those who've been in a relationship with someone for years, how long did it take you to bang?

>>17783348
arouse* me, he* won't go down on me

Sorry

>>17783348
Precum really does very little for lubricating anyway. Have you seen a doctor about your inability to get wet? What kinds of lube have you tried?

>>17783298
As a guy who is kind of like that i'd say: sort of. I am personally like that because I have the atypical closed off 4chan hobbies of anime and vidya which kind of wreck the need of social pressure to actually contact with people. His situation might be different though.

Be careful with the poor fuck though and don't break his heart like the bitch who had the gall to come on to me then break up with me once I had started opening up to her under the excuse that she wasn't into me anymore.

>>17783175
IUD, have been on it for 5 years.
No side effect beside not having my period (which anyway made me considerably happier).
100% effective this far.

>>17783353
No, but I'll go to one I think. Always had this problem but until then precum+saliva always did the trick for me. Guys could penetrate me without problem, even though it was hurting me a bit but the pain goes away with the pleasure.
All sort of lube but he don't like it since it's not natural and he don't like the sensation on his dick, and it seems that even with it the bottom of my vagina stay dry.
Honestly he kind of gave up.

>>17783364
I think it's best to go to a doctor or just keep using lube. Ultimately lube will probably be the end outcome whether he likes it or not.

What about masturbation? Do you have difficulty with that? Do you get wet for that or do you never get wet ever?

>>17783349
7 months with my first (we were very young and both virgins tho), and 4 months with my current boyfriend.
Have been with one for 6 years and with the other for 4.

>>17783364
>Guys could penetrate me without problem, even though it was hurting me a bit but the pain goes away with the pleasure.
Yeah gonna echo what the other guy is saying. See a doctor. Your bf being selfish is definitely a problem, but this is pretty significant too.

>>17783348
>>17783364
>he doesnt want sex because it hurts him
>he doesnt like going down on you which can help
>he doesnt like lube which can help
>he's completely given up
your bf sounds really fucking selfish about it all

>>17783370
I'll try to convince him, then (and go to a doctor ofc). I don't trust doctors too much cause I had a problem with my first bf, couldn't do it for 1 year, every time we tried I fainted or cried because of the pain and they said there was no problem with me... the fuck.
I'll find another one I think haha

I don't masturbate, my clit is very sensitive and don't give me much pleasure (compared to my boobs or ears for exemple). Never have an orgasm. Maybe I do it wrong. I do love when he masturbate me for a bit though, but it's rare when that happens.
The thing is he find me very attractive, get hard often and such, but we don't even try anymore. ends with a bj/hj every time

>>17783298
Leave him alone

>>17783358
>Be careful with the poor fuck

why is he a poor fuck

>>17783383
Definitely find a different doctor.

Maybe try doing it in the shower or even a bath?

>>17783381
I can understand, when every time you try to penetrate your SO it's dry and narrow and un-welcoming and it hurts.
I don't want him to feel guilty about that (he do already) since I honestly have a lot of pleasure/satisfaction letting him cum in my mouth and such. I tell him it's alright and I'm not frustrated and he always mean it, but sometimes I realize I lie to myself.
I don't want him to feel forced to do anything, that'd be horrible.

>>17783381
This and

> I do love when he masturbate me for a bit though, but it's rare when that happens.
>we don't even try anymore. ends with a bj/hj every time

Really sounds like he's really selfish.

>>17783395
and I always mean it* damn
Sorry for my poor english

>>17783394
Hmm why not. Don't have a bath and the shower is a bit narrow but it's worth a shot I guess. Whe have trouble doing it standing up though, seems like the "angle" is not good

>>17783395
Maybe try some things. Watch a little porn, get a toy or something and work on masturbating. It could be all about your technique possibly since you mention going for the clit a lot and over sensitivity is never a good thing.

>>17783397
Everyone has trouble doing it standing up, believe me. I think a bath is worth trying at least since it might make things a little easier while you wait to go to the doctor.

I also don't know why, but I get the feeling you're either from Germany or a Latin country? No idea why but I sense it from the writing style.

>>17783401
I usually avoid porn because it ends up being frustrating to me. Also I'm not sure I like the porn my body like if it makes sense. Hardcore stuff. I do get wet more than ever, but doing things like this with my bf is out of the question.
Maybe I'll try again though. If I focus on the technique it may be less frustrating.
I'm from france, actually!

>>17781919
I'd approach the sexy chick first. If she's a psycho or boring, I'd drop it no matter how hot she is.

If I approach the innocent one, I expect her to bloom/open up fast enough to make it worth the time we spend.

>>17783405
>Hardcore stuff. I do get wet more than ever, but doing things like this with my bf is out of the question.
What specifically? It might be worth considering if it works for you. My gf is into quite a few things and I've been fine with indulging her.

>If I focus on the technique it may be less frustrating.
I think it will help quite a bit. Maybe watch a few videos of a woman solo and see how she does it. It sounds weird I know, but it's a way of learning.

>france
I was pretty far off then but that's pretty great.

>>17783412
BDSM stuff, humiliating, rough sex. I'm not even sure I would like it IRL, I always feel of mix of anger, sadness and excitement for these kind of things.
My bf is very vanilla, which is fine I like it this way too, but I'd feel judged if I told him about that. He was uncomfortable with the bj for a long time, thought it was humiliating and such.

Thanks for taking your time to respond to me btw !

>>17783424
>BDSM stuff, humiliating, rough sex. I'm not even sure I would like it IRL, I always feel of mix of anger, sadness and excitement for these kind of things.
You're pretty similar to my gf, she's into all that kind of thing and more. I was admittedly reluctant to try anything like it but she eased me into it slowly, so maybe you can try the same? There's no harm in trying and obviously you both should only go as far with things as you're comfortable with.

Don't worry about judgement, in a relationship people are a lot more accepting of things, especially if it's just about sex and what you're into. Try not to be too nervous, I'ms ure he's probably into some things he's never talked about too.

>Thanks for taking your time to respond to me btw
No problem anon. Everyone always helps me out and I enjoy giving a little back, especially when it's something I can relate to and can help with.

>>17782480
You need to learn a lot about life.

>Why should I stop believing that it is objectification, and demoralizing?
>but nobody has taken the time or been straight enough with me
This shoudn't be too difficult to figure out.

I'll try a different approach than most answers. Forget about porn for now.
Educate yourself about ethics. You talk about "morals", but given your post, you probably don't know what that truly is.

Try to become a person who knows her/his ethics. Then think about porn consumption again.

>>17783435
I know him very well, and I'm sure he wouldn't like it at all. I'm scared of him judging me. He already despise certain aspects of me and I wouldn't want him to find another.
Also I'm not sure I would want HIM to do this sort of stuff with ME. It would be... wrong? Weird, I guess ? I just want to feel him in me, give him pleasure and love, even the most boring vanilla stuff would be wonderful.
Er, I'm aware I'm depicting him as an asshole right now, but he's really not, actually he's amazing and the person I can trust the most and who understand me the best.
Well, except of that, but I guess it's a compromise I have to make.

I realize now that there's no real solution to this since he gave up already, but I guess I wanted to get if off my chest.

>>17783453
I guess the last thing to try is the doctor I guess, it all depends on that now. Hopefully they can help you out and you can start enjoying sex with him.

>>17783391

My personal bitterness coming through over that last part. Going through that really burned me up and depressed the shit out of me.

>>17783465
Yep. I just hope I'll find a better doctor this time.
The thing is we have been in this situation in so long I'm afraid I have now a mental block when we try, sometimes when I give him a bj I get wet because it arouse me and I know we won't try anything else, but as soon as we "get ready" I stressed out.
If it's now psychological the doc will not be much help.
I have so much wet dreams these days, it's painful. I'm afraid sometimes I won't have proper sex for the rest of my life. And I'm in my early twenties.
Oh well. I'll see, I guess.

>>17782970
take a risk. confront her with her attitude and your intention to help her. but please, stay cool no matter what. the moment you show any kind of whining, anger or any other unhelpful emotional state, you lose the interaction and will get bitched at.

you need to become a fucking huge rock that radiates an aura of calmness. take her aside, somewhere that's out of her usual travel pattern. obviously, a place that isn't stressful is ideal. make her focus on you. if you see her drifting off, get her attention back. tell her how stressed out she is right now and how you want her to be okay again.

what you try to do is make her snap back into a different gear.

>>17783482
That sounds really rough, I really hope it hasn't become a mental block. I think if the bj does get you pretty wet, try to not over think it and attempt sex.

Either way, it's good news that you're able to get wet instead of being totally incapable of it at all so there's hope! In the future try a lot of foreplay too, that always helps.

>>17782887
nope, but if she were doing it I'd interpret it not as being her daddy, but as her desire to make me a daddy. instant boner.

I failed one unit in the last semester of my bachelors. My parents are counting on me to move back in with them to and get a full time job (they live in a big city) in order to help pay off heir mortgage. How can I tell them the bad news?

>>17782970
Send her a text explaining you're hoping everything goes well for her, you're a bit worried for her, that you know she works hard but if she want to lighten up/talk about it you're here, this kind of stuff. Don't ask for a reponse.
Then you leave her be. If you insist that's she's working too hard for her sake it's patronizing and it'll get her mad, trust me. Maybe she doesn't need you atm.
Of course it doesn't mean you have to accept her attitude. If she's this bitchy you can always tell her that and that you won't talk to her until she calmed down.

>>17783494
Yeah, sometimes we try in the middle of a bj because of that but it don't always work.
Foreplay, yeah I that would be nice but he get bored easily so... he does apologize a lot about that, and maybe it's my fault, I always reassure him a lot, telling him it's not a big deal and such. What can I do ? I don't want him to feel forced. It should be natural..

>>17783509
Hmm, it sounds like he's just really not into anything and gives up pretty fast.

Try sexy clothing and teasing and that kind of thing. One thing my gf does is wear thigh high stockings, a dress and no panties and teases me to oblivion. I doubt he'd be able to resist and all his lust and desire will probably make you pretty wet, at least that kind of thing works REALLY well for my gf anyway.

So if you've got some really nice lingerie, get it out and show it off.

>>17782282
Male
Good
>somewhat educated
>apparently good sense of humour
>calm, hard to provoke
>interested in many things
>good manners

Bad
>often depressed
>constantly underestimating myself
>easily discouraged
>sudden change to smug once superior to somebody else
>passive

>>17783512
He doesn't like lingerie at all, or make-up, this sort of thing, he actually prefers when I'm natural and show his desire to me all the time, we make out and cuddle a lot. When I go out for a couple days we're both really horny at my return and try to do it (or end up with hj/bj) several times a day for a week or so, so it's not really a problem. It makes it worse actually, it's hard and frustrating when you're so horny and you met with pain and dryness for no reason. With time he became more and more discouraged and now he won't try for more than 2mn or so before giving up

>>17783522
>He doesn't like lingerie at all, or make-up, this sort of thing, he actually prefers when I'm natural and show his desire to me all the time
this guy could make vanilla fucking blush
are you fine with your sex life? because its not going to get better with this guy
its going to be this way forever

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>>17783522
>He doesn't like lingerie at all, or make-up, this sort of thing
This is making me feel bad for you. It sounds like you're really trying hard and really know how to turn a guy on, but your bf... well I don't know what to say.

>>17783529
I convinced myself for a long time that it was totally fine this way, because I tought it would change. Now I'm not so sure and I feel like I'm missing a lot. I always had a fun sex like, I liked to experiment and try new things. But I truly love him with all my heart and I honestly need him in my life, so I guess it's a concession I have to make.
I have still hope, ofc, but it get thinnier and thinnier with time.
Sometimes I ask myself if I can keep it up with him because of that and I feel like a petty whore for thinking like that.

>>17783532
Actually it's pretty cool that he can desire me and find me beautiful all the time. I'm this way too when I love someone.
If we hadn't this technical problem I'm sure we would fuck like rabbits. And yeah, it is sad.

>>17783538
>I convinced myself for a long time that it was totally fine this way, because I tought it would change
It probably won't change unfortunately. I understand that you love him deeply but your sexual incompatibility is a really big issue, you're practically opposites. You're not a petty whore for having needs at all, everyone has needs and the truth is that yours aren't being met at all. I hope it can improve but I think you really need to ask yourself honestly if you can continue on like this.

As for the mental health aspect, you might start to resent sex due to being unable to have it or enjoy it and you might some day completely hate anything sexual altogether. It's happened to people I know for from relationships like yours and it's truly a shame.

>>17783542
Yeah... well if I see the doc, maybe... I'm on the pill since my fourteen and I've heard that it can affect libido and wetness, so since I've never had sex without its influence I'll try and change it for something else.
Honestly if this doesn't work I doubt anything else would. And then maybe I'll start asking myself what to do. Actually he wanted our relationship to be open, we tried it a bit and him seeing another girl tore my heart appart. It was awful and we don't bring it up anymore. Sometimes I wonder if it could be a solution, but... I'm not sure I could do it.

I like to get Christmas cards for my family, and I was thinking about getting one for the girl I like as well. We talked a bit but we aren't too close. Would it be too weird? I'd probably just write have a nice Christmas and see you next semester or some bullshit like that.
We're both college kids.

>>17783563
It would be weird in my opinion if you aren't very close.

What's stopping you from just asking her out? You've at least already spoken to her.

>>17783573
Figured.
I prefer to wait till we are already pretty close to ask someone out, as I tend to be a nervous wreck hanging around people I don't know for too long,

>>17783410
I chose the hot sexy, ended up being crazy

Should've gone with the innocent but she got snatched up

Oh well

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how do i discern actual attraction from a girl messing with me for laughs, or rather, how do i talk to her about this?

t. guy who has been shown unwarranted attention by several girls he only knows through common friends

>>17783349
Me and my wife of 8 years were fucking within 2 hours after we first met

>>17783675

Ignore them or answer in short sentences (only one word if possible). Don't initiate contact yourself. They should get bored eventually.

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>>17783069
Im done

>>17783679
fair enough, that's what i'm pretty much doing already, just wondering if anyone had similar experiences

Is there anything a bf can be or do in bed that a woman won't gossip to every friend or acquaintance she has? It's irritating.

>>17783690
I never said a word about the things my bf and I do in bed to my friends.
Do not blame all women for the things that your girlfriend does.

>>17782282
Male
24

Good
>Inteligent/cultured
>Loyal (to couples, friends, etc.)
>Often calmed and chill
>Great empathy
>Humble

Bad
>Lazy and unambitious
>Anger issues
>Probably depressive
>Probably paranoid
>Awful at reading body language

>>17783690

Do you want advice or do you want to rant and bitch?

Have a problem with your girl, work it out with her.

>>17782624
He seems nice enough, give him a chance. Try to discover why he got divorced though.

Also ask your guy friend what he means about being a bitch. I'm sure he has a good reason. But it could be either that he genuinely dislikes the guy or that he's jealous.

>>17782887
I hate it but I've growed to tolerate it after a lot of contact with hispanic women. Papi here, papi there, papi everywhere.

>>17783704
Ok, I'm sorry. I'm probably doing the same as she going here anyway.

Guys, if a girl you're in a relationship with suggested pegging how would you react?

>>17783724
Entirely depends on how sexually open she is.

If she lets me do her in the ass, jizz on her face, force her to dress up like a schoolgirl with pigtails. Why shouldn't I let her live out her small fantasy.

>>17783147
>may just think it's odd that you're actively searching for a girlfriend, I do. I've never looked for someone to be interested in, and don't know anyone who has

Now that makes some sense considering their personalities. Still a bit strange thing to find odd imho, considering date apps exist and are growing.

>>17783298
>he's doing math

You awnsweres yourself. Yes it's normal.

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Girls

What do you think of a guy if you found out that he has no close friends and spend most of his free time alone?

>>17783754
I wouldn't mind

>>17783690
Two options:
>get a girl who isn't an untrustworthy whore
>do things that are too intimate/humiliating for her to tell

I'll suggest the first.

>>17783724
I would accept to give it a try, but only if she has the same attitude towards my own sugestions.

Also I would make it clear that I find this humiliating and I'll probably won't like it, so this is probably the first and last time we're doing it. And more important, she better not tell this to anyone or it's over.

Girls

Why do you hate other women?

Never I've seen so much tantrum and verbal poison for petty issues than when my girlfriends or female friends talked about other women. Specially those they perceived as more attractive (often mistakenly). Like this friend of mine who hates redheads and can't stop spouting poison when she meets one (never face to face of course). She has a fetish for rockers and, under her perception, rockers like goth-like redheads, so redheads are equal to Satan now. I've never seen a man doing anything similar, even bitter nerds on 4chan seem to hate society in general rather than other specific males. And those are social pariahs, the women I'm talking about are almost all socially capable and physically attractive. Is it jealousy? Why be jelly over random people?

I know you probably have a fistful of good friends you obviously don't hate, those don't count.

>>17783797
>I've never seen a man doing anything similar, even bitter nerds on 4chan seem to hate society in general rather than other specific males.
r9k had a mini celebration on the anniversary of Elliot Rodgers rampage because he killed the ~evil normalfags~.

People get stupid when they think another party (e.g. chad thundercock) is stealing "their" stuff (your friend with rockers)

Can I win her back if she sais she has moved on and when I propose we meet and talk she sais" there is nothing to talk about, we ve said everything"? No new boyfriend, 100% certain. I am the one who f*cked up when we broke up. No cheatin n shiet.

>>17783797
I don't know if this is true, but once I heard in a podcast how women tend to compete and hate each other because there is only *one* alpha man and we all want him.
I personally do not hate women all that much.
My boyfriend says I'm misogynist as fuck tho. But my boyfriend is a politically correct asshole.

>>17783797

I work in education and in our workplace there are a few of these witches, but generally speaking women stick together and are sympathetic and supportive towards each other. Most of women I've met throughout my life are like that, genuinely nice. Too bad that those few awful ones tend to ruin the athmosphere for all. Only immature and petty women do this. I have no idea why it happens, but if I hazard a guess I'd say women with poor self-esteem gain some confidence and feeling of power by putting others down.

>>17783712
He said the guy had that newness facade and I'm wanting to settle for whatever. He may be a blunt prick yes but his advice has always been trustworthy and he's kinda right about me. I had a crush on him for a while it's just that he started dating one of our mutual friends before getting to know me, then he broke up and I started this, so our timing was off or maybe it's just lustful thinking

>>17783801
R9k was happy for the death of both genders. In fact they probably were happier about the death of "sluts" than any "Chad" dying.

>>17783806
I think most woman are mysoginit too, and I openly support Trump.

Can I win her back if she sais she has moved on and when I propose we meet and talk she sais" there is nothing to talk about, we ve said everything"? No new boyfriend, 100% certain. I am the one who f*cked up when we broke up. No cheatin n shiet.

I posted it some mins ag but noone bothered. Pls Im desperate.

>>17783834
She's dead, Jim. And so is her love for you.

>>17783824
My opinion is that your friend's opinion is probably honest, but he also probably sees you as something more than a friend. Not necessarily he wants to knock you instead of this guy (although is possible), he may just see you kinda like a sister and wants to protect you. Anyways honesty is not reason, and it should be yourself judging what you want.

That said, you should work on the "would settle for anything" thing. He probably won't say it because of a single dude, so it's probably a real problem of yours you have to work on. This doesn't necessarily mean you liked Divorced Guy due to this problem, though.

>>17783834
Looks like you can't. You shouldn't see her being single as a good thing for you, since it probably means you fucked up so hard she doesn't want to hear about dudes/relationships. And women often stay in this mood for longer than men (even if they manage to become happy again).

I'm a straight guy with a girlfriend, but she doesn't like to give blowjobs and I'd never make her. Since I have a slim figure, I tried putting on her clothes out of curiosity while she was gone. It turned out better than I expected, so I put up a craigslist ad with a pic and got tons of replies from men. Now I get some of the best blowjobs in my life from gay men while my girlfriend is gone and it feels great if I simply close my eyes and imagine it's a woman.

Does this make me gay?

>>17783833
Why do you think so? I honestly do not feel particularly misogynist. Like, yes, not a big fan of tumblr feminists, but who is?

>>17783857
You're certainly not straight.

You're also cheating her and that's bad.

>>17783724
ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING!

>>17783861
How is it bad if there are no feelings involved, if my feelings for her don't change, if I don't see any of those guys ever again and if she will never find out anything about it?

>>17783859
Tumblr aside, mysoginism just means hating women and, like I said, my experiences tell me that a gigantic amount of women hate women.

Now, I'm in my early-mid twenties and so are most of the people I talk with. Maybe the anon who said it's just immature women who do that is on the right.

>>17782887
I do. I blame it on an early exposure to BDSM and incest porn. It also stems from being over eager to please and putting a lot of importance on praise. "That's my good girl. You make Daddy feel so good." drives me crazy.
I have a good relationship with my real dad, but it's mostly intellectual. He's not super warm. Could go both ways here- some daddy-issues attempt to recreate what I wanted. OR the sex dynamic is so far removed from my actual relationship with my real dad that I don't associate the two. Therefore I can enjoy it without grossness.

My boyfriend says that he's happy to go through with whatever gets me off, but I do worry that he doesn't like it.

>>17783868
Well, it seems that infidelity is not bad for you as long as it's secret (ie almost always). So from your point of view it's normal that it won't be bad.

Kinda fucked up of a point of view though. For starters "my feelings for her don't change" is contradictory with wielding "she will never find out" as a positive thing. You don't lie to people you love.

>>17783878
My view on it is this: Love and sex are completely different things. I can have sex with someone and not be attracted to them, especially if it's just receiving a blowjob from a person of the opposite gender I don't even find attractive. The reason I don't want her to find out is because she obviously doesn't share my mindset and she might be hurt. If she had the same mindset, I'd tell her.

For me, it's basically the same thing as secretly fapping to porn when I could be having sex with my girlfriend.

>>17783884
It is not.
If you are in a committed relationship you make a promise to your partner to stay faithful to them sexually and emotionally.
You aren't being faithful if you get your dick sucked by some dude off craiglist.

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>>17783857
>>17783868
is this real? if so you are an ultra faggot

>>17783884
Congratulations! Your values don't fit those of the society you're living in, as you already acknowledge! While this isn't exactly a bad thing, you need to learn that you need to be adaptative. Specially when you're in a contract shaped by those values, not yours. Because that's what social and specially romantic relationships are, social spoken contracts.

Tl;dr Your girlfriend doesn't separate love and sex since she's a normal person, so your opinion is worth nothing. Find a girl who shares your point of view.

Girl this is usually my outfit:

>T-shirt
>Chino pants
>hoddie or plain sweater

Anything wrong with this?

>>17783884
And, by the way, you're an absolute cunt by dehumanizing people having intercourse with you comparing them to porn videos. Not nice. They may be homo weirdos, but they're humans and your sexual partners.

>>17783919
Not really.

>>17783890
Yeah, you're right. And I'm aware of that. I'll put an end to it soon enough. It's interesting how everyone's latching onto the cheating topic when my question was if it makes me gay. Okay, except this guy >>17783895

>>17783908
She shares my point of view in the things that actually matter and I'm not planning on getting my dick sucked by people on craigslist for long anyway.

>>17783923
Wait, are you saying they see me as something more than the dick they can suck off when they feel like sucking a dick? Seriously?

>>17783929
>I'm not planning on getting my dick sucked by people on craigslist for long anyway.
What's the deadline?

>>17783945
Until I get tired of it and I'm already a bit tired of it. I know how a good blowjob feels now, I got what I was missing out on and I can move on with my normal life.

When I start to get serious with a girl, I'll often get her a plant, wether it's an orchid or some other low maintenance something. All that needs to be done is to leave it by the window and water it once a week. I think of it as a test to how much she take me and the future relationship seriously. Most of the time they fucking kill it with neglect and say something like oops I don't have a green thumb lol. Then the relationship soon follows because of other things.

Am I nuts or what?

>>17783797
Women are highly competitive. Deep down, we hate seeing one another succeed, even sometimes if we are succeeding ourselves. Idk why, some biological thing probably.
My best guess is, especially since women are most competitive when it comes to finding a mate, is because we know biologically we only have so many chances to reproduce. We want the best partners for our offspring, and typically don't like other women snatching up all our good options.

And I think this is all on a subconscious level more than anything in this day and age. I mean fuck, I'm disgusted by the idea of pregnancy and/or having kids and never intend to have any, but I still get salty when I see other women getting men. I don't say anything or act upon it, but I do think to myself "fuck that bitch, how'd she win at the game of life like that?"
Doesnt help that typically women are pretty vicious about "showing off" their boyfriend. They'll take a million cutesy pics to put up online, so that they can scream "LOOK I GOT ONE HAHA!", hell I even have good friends who will low key show off despite knowing I hate it. Like my BFF completely turns into a new person as soon as her bf walks in and suddenly has to "mark her territory" or whatever. Gotta sit in his lap, kiss him every 5 minutes on the dot, giggle at every dumb thing he says. They know what they're doing, just can't stop themselves I guess.

>>17783949
This seems studio.

But I'm gonna try it.

>>17783959
I dated a woman like you. Snatched me up before her friend could. Didn't want kids until I said that I did and we should probably end it, then all of a sudden she's like maybe kids aren't all that bad? Whenever I had to work on a weekend and one of her girlfriends had a get together that I couldn't attend, she'd get pissy because all the other boyfriend were going to be there. I'd just tell her to relish the fact that these guys always try to bro out with me like I'm their leader, while wearing a smirk.

Ok so ill start-- Im 18, a junior in hs, and im so additcted to companionship with a female. The problem is I'm hated by literally everyone, my friend even told me he asked people if they hated me, and they all said yes, but they said they didnt know why? Im afraid that being hated by almost everyone, abd being unpopular will ruin my chances od a relationship in my school. Is this a possibility, and should i wait until i reach college in 2 years?

>>17783973
Eh, I wouldn't say I'm like that though. Like I said, I think those things, but don't act upon it. Too lazy I guess, not worth the energy to actually bitch about it.
And given the fact I'd rather be dead than pregnant, nobody will change my mind on that. Yeah, I want a relationship with the possibility of forever, but not that badly. I'd rather be a bitter, salty old hag the rest of my miserable existence than destroy my body and then be left undesirable forever when the dude leaves me precisely because my body is destroyed and unfuckable. (And nobody likes single moms.)

In the dating game, my bod is my prime asset. Not gonna do anything to jeopardize it any further than my shit genetics already did for me. I know damn well that there really is no such thing as forever in this day and age, therefore I have to maintain it for life. Never know when I'll get dumped, because dudes can always upgrade to younger women. Women are used up by the time they hit 30 really.

is it wrong of me to flirt with platonic friends if we both know there's nothing more to it? in the moment, i think it's fun to do, but afterwards i start to worry about if it's okay for me to do it or not

Girls, is a guy liking to crossdress a deal breaker for you? This is assuming he is straight and just occasionally likes to dress differently, and wearing his clothes not yours.

>>17784031
>Girls, is a guy liking to crossdress a deal breaker for you?
Yes. I find it really off-putting.

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Girls

So let's be honest and just say I was a gigantic beta coward during my teenager years, and my insecurities merged with the typical unability of teenager guys to pick girl's hints. There's this girl I liked when I was around 18 but never dared to find out if it was mutual, despite my friends guaranteeing it was, because I was sure she wanted me only as a friend. Later we spent years without seeing each other at all (shit happens), but apparently we frequent some common places and we interchanged some small chat the other day. All is fine, not the same as it was but that's normal, we both have growed up. The next time I see her I will probably suggest to meet for a coffee in order to catch up and maybe retake contact.

Would it be odd if I tell her how I felt about her and if it was a mistake to not ask her out? Notice that I don't feel anything for her right now and, in fact, i'm going out with another girl since I pretty much solved all the autism problems of my teenager years. I just would like to know if it could've been different had I been a better person. But I'm scared he believes I'm some weirdo or that I'm declaring some feelings I don't have anymore.

>>17784035
traps and faggots BTFO

>>17784008
It's all fun and jokes until one of the two starts seeing it as not platonic. Which almost always ends up happening.

I'll say that, rather than wrong, it's dangerous.

>>17784000
I also dated a 30yr old. After a few months I'd see those personality flaws come out. Could sense the fear of abandonment, would think something's wrong with her, would get bitchy even after I just spent my free time helping her out. Little things building up that made me question if she's a decent human or it's gonna get worse long term.

>>17783949
Even something as simple as a plant is extra responsibility and having to keep more routines in your head, unless you already have plants. It's one of the more annoying gifts if you don't know the person.

Also after what period do you do this generally?

>>17784008
If both of you are absolutely clear and open about it. Just because you think there's nothing more to it, doesn't guarantee that the other persons sees it the same.

>Off and on relationship with a girl
>When I'm with her, I really never want to do anything with her. Talking to her is a chore, and I don't really care about any of her problems. I pretend to, but I really don't
>When I'm not with her, I get depressed and want her back and jealous of other dudes she might be talking to
The fuck is wrong with me?

>>17784068
Sounds like being typical immature and jelly fag. Partly out of ignorance, partly out of low confidence.

You'll grow out of it.

>>17784031
Hmm, that's something I wouldn't know unless I was put in that situation.
I'm pretty open minded, but I tend to like my men very heterosexual and masculine. I definitely would not be participating in anything physical/sexual while you're dressed up at the very least.

>>17784008
>is it wrong of me to flirt with platonic friends if we both know there's nothing more to it?

>if we both know there's nothing more to it
That's kind of the crux of the matter.

>>17783949
>I think of it as a test to how much she take me and the future relationship serious

I'm a dude... but... yes... you're being kind of crazy there... The fact that you feel you have to "test" people is already kind of...questionable... but to choose something so particularly arbitrary on top of it... You're reading in to things that have nothing to do with one anther. You may as well be read horoscopes and tea leaves for all the good your "test" will do you.

>>17783724
>Guys, if a girl you're in a relationship with suggested pegging how would you react?

My girlfriends hinted/asked if i'd be in to it before.
My response: "Not really".
Then we moved on.

>>17783348
>My bf won't have sex with me anymore because we both lack of natural lube and it hurts him too much when he try to penetrate me. What do i do?

No offence.... but like other anon said, if your boyfriend really isn't willing to use lube/oral/whatever because it makes him uncomfortable, he kinda sounds like a selfish/whiny bitch.

This is further reinforced by the fact that apparently he compared you to his last girlfriend? (or else I have no idea why you know she was always wet)

Your two options:
Dump him
Go see a doctor.

>>17783204
>Can I invite a female friend over for food without it being weird?

Can you? Because that's entirely up to you. Don't be an awkward weirdo/try to beta orbit it in to a relationship and it won't be weird .

>>17781919
Cute. For me the cute girls are the most attractive anyway..all that bad bitch make up is fake and unappealing to me. But beyond that, cute girls tend to be more sincere empathetic sweet and considerate, the qualities I like in a partner. Its a generalization obviously, but it plays out in my experience.

>>17784031
I'd find it fun and would want to help! I'm mostly submissive but I'd be willing to do sex stuff with it. If it gets him off, that turns me on.

>>17784040
Help please, I don't want to make her uncomfortable or regretful that we've met again. But at the same time it would be good for my own self-growing to know if I was "right" or just a coward making excuses.

I've been at the same crappy job for four years now (I'm 25) and recently they had a talk with me about what exactly my plan is. They've always wanted to promote me and move me up, but I've always fought it because I really don't want to work here forever. Problem is I really don't know what else to do. Everyone in my life tells me to go back to school, but even then I don't know what I'd go for, I'd just be wasting my time. Any idea what to do? How does one figure out what the hell they want to do with their life?

>>17784068
You're more interested in the idea of a relationship than specifically her

>>17783688 #
How do you start over again for the 2nd or 3rd go? Like letting go of all the past shit?

The girlfriends friend split us up with her misery loves company/stay single bullshit. I wasn't too enthused that the gf was so easily influenced. Says she's sorry, I'm the best guy she's dated, and that we started new again. Every time I see this friend, I'm like whoa hold on buddy, don't care as much and you won't get hurt again

>>17784131
Why not accept the promotions though? Even if you don't stay there forever, it will mean more cash so at least the time you spend there will be more worthy.

Nobody can really help you to find the passion of your life, but while looking for it yourself you may as well make more cash.

>>17784128
>>17784040
I'd probably be uncomfortable. I'd bring that up if you wanted to spark something. Particularly if she still likes you, that will make her frustrated and regretful that she didn't do anything about it.
You're doing this for your own sake. What does he get out of it?

>>17784031
>Girls, is a guy liking to crossdress a deal breaker for you?
Yes, very offputting like someone else said

>>17783884
Then find someone who shares your views.
Give her the chance to decide for herself.
>>17783834
Probably not. It reminds me of a similar situation I went through, and no, I really meant it when I said I wasn't interested, and any attempt of anything would have bothered me a lot.

>>17784138
That's a good question and, since we didn't keep contact, I can't awnser to it. Last time we interchanged more than a couple of sentences i was a teenager with no experience of life, and my distorted memories are not enough to determine if she would've accepted or not to have a date.

>that will make her frustrated and regretful that she didn't do anything about it
Let's be honest here, if she was attracted to me she probably did "everything" that a teenager girl can do about it. I learned the hard way that almost no girl will go beyond "subtle" hints if you don't make the move, and that I was unable to see those hints for most of my life.

>What does she get out of it?
Well, in case she liked me she gets the same I do, although it's less important for her since she didn't have my teenager problems.

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Girls

Have you ever experienced boob envy?

#1

>>17781967
RO here, been in serious relationships with people i met at a bar. ONS are a thing here in bars but way more rarely.

>>17781977
why not just ask her to go out sometime and see for yourself?

>>17781989
tell her 'so, don't wanna meet up then?'

>>17782021
i'm attracted to anybody who shows passion in a subject. guitar is pretty basic desu, i'd rather he was into something more original just because it shows that he really likes it for himself. but if he really likes it and isn't doing it for the pussy (which is gonna fail on every decent girl) then sure, i'll like watching him play. but i don't go crazy over it. no girl does.

>>17782095
go for a walk in the park if it's not too cold. focus on activities that allow you two to talk, not theaters or movies or shit like that which require focus. you could also try some good old bowling or shit like that, games in general always make for good dates.
>>17782121
also this!

>>17782157
you rejected her you waste of air, wtf? ofc she's mad at you. you showed no interest in having anything to do with her again 'like the good old times', dismissed her totally when she tried to talk to you and catch up. and NOW because you're feeling better you want to be 'friends again'? lol leave her alone. you already basically told her to fuck off indirectly.

>>17782174
passive texts
generally being nonresponsive / giving no feedback in convos. e.g. you make a joke and i answer 'idk' or 'hah' or 'lol' repeatedly, as in multiple times. that's basically it, idk how guys could miss when a chick's not interested. it's always obvious. the hard part is to tell when she is, lol.

>>17782265
i honestly don't know. i don't really have patience with 'shy' people.

cont in post #2

>>17784158
>Let's be honest here, if she was attracted to me she probably did "everything" that a teenager girl can do about it.
I'll still make a face, since I've always pursued the guys I wanted. But I certainly had friends who didn't do that. I was always annoyed with them.

>Well, in case she liked me she gets the same I do
But you have a girlfriend who you like, and you are no longer interested in this girl. What if she still pines over you and doesn't have someone to go home to?

post #2 >>17784170


>>17782282
20 female
best: 1. intelligent. 2. i never lie 3. genuinely care about whomever deserves it 4. funny 5. interesting to most people
worst: 1. i come across as narcissistic to some people because of what i like to think is objectively judging myself 2. people think i'm very mean but in reality i'm just always honest. i don't insult when uncalled for though. 3. i spend a lot of time on /b/ and /r9k/ 4. i don't like the act of sex 5. i get frustrated easily when someone doesn't understand something after having said that they did or liars.

>>17782349
i've seen girls change but never ever wait or hope for one to change. don't waste time on that bullshit, ever. if anything, YOU won't be the thing that changes her.

>>17782457
any hobby or passion a guy has will interest me. makes for a more palpable personality, makes the guy more 'real'.

>>17782465
simply don't flirt. she'll figure it out. if she goes overboard, tell her off nicely.

>>17782559
go for it. who cares what she thinks of it on the spot? just tell her merry christmas if you wanna tell her merry christmas ffs. she'll make of it whatever she wants to make of it.

>>17782581
i don't know. i wouldn't take it too seriously or as too much of a sign. maybe though.

>>17782608
i have been exactly where you are standing, man. EXACTLY there. guy was perfect, i knew we were amazing together and he was amazing but it just didn't feel as intense at it should have felt, even though i was over my ex. my best advice is to stop fretting about it. don't stress yourself out. enjoy the nice moments you get with this person and don't think so much about 'does this feel exactly right?' and so on. just let things flow. if it starts getting stressful how wrong it feels though, i'm afraid you'll have to end it at some point because it will probably always be in the back of your mind. anyway, for now, just let things go their own way, take their own course and see where it goes. :)

cont in post #3

>>17782608
I worry that this is my boyfriend. But he doesn't use 4chan.
I agree with this anon >>17784174
>enjoy the nice moments you get with this person and don't think so much about 'does this feel exactly right?'
Give yourself some time to open up to this girl. You're comparing how you felt over three years to the very recent amount of time you've known this new girl. Have you even hit the three month mark yet?

post #3 >>17784174


>>17782646
let things happen, but if you feel like meeting new people sure, just go out and meet new people! :) do what you feel like doing anon

>>17782698
she's feeling self conscious, probably. why don't you try to talk to her about it? ask her what's up, why she eats so little and if she feels insecure about her weight. then, maybe you can do something about it together like someone else suggested.

>>17782836
nah it's ok, let her be with that guy :).

>>17782841
no, but i would talk to him about it.

>>17782887
i am turned off by this horribly as a female. i hate that shit. would never do it.

>>17782920
sure, tell her

>>17782970
>>17783503 this. tell her what's up.

>>17783007
places where you go meet people with which you have things in common. e.g. if you both like metal, at a metal bar. if you like guitar, at a guitar shop or whatever. you get it. look for similar people rather than objectively 'nice' or 'cool' people.

>>17783027
i personally like any passionate guy. he can be passionate about making furniture, writing songs or euthanizing cats.

>>17783108
nice guys aren't nice at all. see >>17783116
i also don't go for chads. i like guys that are similar to me. my type of person is me. i don't have very high standards and i'm usually the 'hot girl with ugly guy' thing you see on the streets.

>>17783204
yea, just don't be awkward.

>>17783339
i've met chicks who liked gay male porn. i don't. i guess i see it kinda like why guys like lesbian porn. cause chicks find guys attractive. idk. i don't like porn personally.
also, it depends on the chick. chicks like a lot of different body parts about the guys. i like hands and legs, for example. others like backs, others like muscles. i don't like muscly guys. it really really depends on the girl.

cont in post #4

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>strung along and eventually rejected by oneitis
>deny it for like a year, prolonging misery
>finally work up the guts to unfriend and block her on Facebook
>mfw now I just feel even worse

>>17784000
I want a girl like you. Would you be my wife? Where are you from?

post #4 >>17784195

>>17783563
i think it's cute. go for it. :)

>>17783754
don't mind. i do too.

>>17783797
i'm not like that at all. i'm kinda misogynistic, as in i assume when i first meet a woman that she won't surprise me with her intellect, but that's about it. i never really feel a need to hate on other women because they're also women or because they're 'better' than me. i never really compare myself to other women, i guess actually i feel a bit detached from the idea that i'm in a group with them.

>>17783805
depends on situation. just be honest and direct. tell her everything you think and feel just as you would to a stranger on the internet, basically. that is if you really feel like you have something to add of value to the convo. seems like she thinks there's nothing to talk about anymore.

>>17783857
it doesn't matter if feelings are not involved. you are betraying her and lying to her. you're a piece of shit and yes, it is cheating. idk if it's gay but it's cheating and you suck.

>>17783919
no, it's ok.

>>17783949
ew gross how you feel a need to 'test' chicks by pseudo-intellectual shit like that. anyway, giving a plant to a girl is nice but only if you ask her beforehand if they would consider taking care of one. it's still a responsibility. maybe they just don't care for plants. i personally like the idea because it gives me something to take care of while associating it with taking care of something from that special someone. only do it after a longer period of being together though and not for any stupid pseudo reason.

>>17784031
i'd laugh with him but if it's a serious thing for him or he wants anything physical while dressed like that, i would totally say no.

>>17783999
being unpopular won't matter to the person who is right for you. if it matters, then fuck her.

>>17784040
sure, tell her, but just like you told us. tell her everything that it's about, the reason behind it and so on. don't play stupid social games about it. just tell her.

>>17784068
>>17784132
THIS, exactly.

>>17784159
nope, i'm a C cup and i consider my boobs 10/10.

>>17784170
>>17784174
>>17784195
>>17784226
Hey just wanted to point out that I appreciate your work here.
I don't agree with everything you say, but it's really nice to have another girl in here with a different perspective.

>>17784298
thanks a lot! nice to know i wasn't wasting words :) if you care to elaborate on what we disagree, i'd love to talk more.

>>17784173
>But you have a girlfriend who you like, and you are no longer interested in this girl. What if she still pines over you and doesn't have someone to go home to?

That's a fair point. Let's say we talk a bit about her life and apparently she has a boyfriend too or at least something similar. Which is posible and even likely, it's been a lot of years. Would she still be hurt?

To be honest I didn't expect the fact that this situation could hurt her, although that's because her having feelings for me in this day and date was totally out of the equation in my mind.

>>17784226
Thanks for the direct and honest awnser. Is okay something like:

>You'll probably laugh at this, but you know? I liked her a lot when we were teens and never got the guts to tell you. I was quite stupid, X and Y said you would've have agreed if I have asked you out/kissed you at that party.

Although a bit more natural since it will be in our native language and not english.

>>17784343
The last thing was supposed to be a question, I fucked up.

>>17784159
Girls are more likely to have boob envy if they perceive that a person they like feels attracted towards someone with bigger boobs. They don't care when this isn't the case or are secure enough about themselves to believe they can compete with the big tits girl with other qualities.

So it's not really boob envy but just envy in general and frustration (because boob size is not something they can control).

>>17784343
yeah it would be okay. :)

>>17784349
>(because boob size is not something they can control)
Yes, it is.

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>>17784356

>>17784356
A lot of men, me included, dislike fake boobs or at least consider them to be 2nd tier. Not to mention the money.

I know well I would take a slightly smaller pair of tits than two big plastic balloons. I don't like women with no breasts, but a women without them has more chances with me as she is before the boobjob.

>>17784370
I'm a big tits enthusiast. I don't care if it is fake or real.

>>17784159
E cup here.. Yeah, I want smaller tits. B or C cup maybe.. But I wouldn't even mind being completely flat, those deep v-necked dresses are perfect for flatchested girls. I could never ever wear one without looking like a hooker, and that I envy that flatchested girls can rock that look with no problems. Most types of clothing looks better on flatchested girls desu.