Apathy

>>17772721
To continue, the only sliver of joy I've experienced recently is a short period after I buy myself something of the internet and it's delivered, but that only lasts about a few hours and is limited to direct interaction with it (books, comics and such).

Ive experienced this as well.

Through high school i lost the will to live and everything stopped being fun until i saw the most beautiful girl i had ever seen. It took 2 years before i talked to her and after we fell in love my life stopped being shit.

>>17772731
>whenever I talk to my gf I fake happiness for whatever I'm supposed to.
>my gf

you're basically telling him to break up with his gf because he doesn't have the same happiness that you have with you gf

and if it takes 1 girl in your life to make you happy then you're admittedly a simple person

His problem seems to be personal apathy, being bored with yourself and not the things around you

>the only sliver of joy I've experienced... ...only lasts about a few hours and is limited to direct interaction with it (books, comics and such)

best option for him is to try to find a skill that lets him create

he would do well teaching himself how to draw or make something from scratch

this my seem a bit presumptuous, but men in general need to work with their hands, create something, or accomplish a goal to feel satisfied

if you're not working on something, not improving, or making something then you get bored complacent and disinterested in things in general because nothing is giving you that feeling anymore

of course this is more conjecture on my part rather than an objective view on apathy

>>17772753
I just posted my experience m9

Meditation, nigger. And I don't mean just sitting for 30 min every day trying to think about nothing.

You need a break from your life. A break from technology, from your friends, from your hobbies, from your duties, from your habits. You need to remove them completely from your life for a period then replace them with something else (or nothing at all if you can stand doing nothing 24 hours a day, just thinking about stuff). There are places where people can do this. In my country it's isolated monasteries, in other countries it's buddhist temples. Or you can just go live with the amish for a couple of months. Basically you need isolation from the outside world and from technology.

But you need to have the right mentality. If you see it as a chore and you're counting the days until it's over you won't achieve much. You must see it as a break from your life, as a vacation of sorts. Live a different life, a completely new experience.

I know this is kind of thing requires quite the commitment, but you should consider it. I'm not offering any guarantees, but I know for a fact that it CAN work. I know people who did this, I did it to some extent (stayed at a monastery with not contact from the outside world, no phone, no nothing, but only for one week) and none of us regretted it. It was a very unique experience. I know some people who experience this kind of isolated life without technology chose it over their former life. You can treat it as a vacation though. But every day of this experience take your time to mediate. Just relax, do a body scan (http://www.mindful.org/the-body-scan-practice/) try to clear your mind then think about your day and your life, how your daily life was before this experience, how it is now.

And you should also read "Happiness" by Matthieu Ricard. It may actually convince you to do what I'm suggesting or it may help you find something wrong you're doing that prevents you from enjoying life.

>>17772753
OP here. I thought about starting a course in web design. Maybe that might pull me out. The initial reason was to make more money, tho, but if it goes as you suggest, then I guess I can try.

File: 087.jpg (351KB, 1450x964px) Image search: [Google]

351KB, 1450x964px

I've gone through this most of my life. I'm 30 now.
I go through waves of differing levels of apathy and depression, and even when I am at my most upbeat and positive, there is always the lingering thought at the back of my mind that I am just going through the motions of a normal persons meaningful life. But really, I know that none of this has any meaning and it is all futile.

Talking to my psychiatrist helps, and so does the fluoxetine.

>>17772769
No such thing near me, I live in Croatia. And don't have enough money to travel. Also general problem with commitments. But I read a lot so probably will read the suggested.

>>17772772
Just out of curiosity, can you predict/expect the waves of apathy/depression or are they random?

I felt like they were random, but after reading the pic from original post, I became aware of what I might be from another's perspective, and am kind of locked in what used to be a cycle for a week now.

>>17772771
It might help if my assumption is correct but I'm no licensed therapist/psychiatrist/psychologist/food handler

so take what a say with a bit of salt

>>17772721
I've been having a similar problem. I think the only thing I feel is guilt that I don't care when I know I should.

It's exhausting feigning interest or excitement. Even just faking being as happy to see someone as they are to see me. Also guilt for having these people and opportunities others would kill for and not caring about any of it.

It's like someone turned off a switch, like a light went out inside. All my passion and interest has gone. It definitely got worse as I've been in a relationship for the last 3yrs. Someone perfect for me, yet I'm still just going through the motions because logically I know I have it good but really can't find it in myself to care.

Wish I had an answer for us anon.