What do I do about my dad?

>>17746756
Do your filial duty. Respond to him when he contacts you, send a communication yourself for every one he sends.

I personally talk to both my parents (they're divorced) at least one a week, each. Feels good, being virtuous and fulfilling my duty to them despite our striking differences

>>17746756

has he done anything positive for you as of late? given you good advice, bought you something that you needed, helped you work out some problem? If he has, maybe try to be a little more lenient. If he hasn't, straight up tell him him being flaky and not being a good father is not enough for you to put any effort into the relationship.

>>17746764
Why? He's just going to guilt trip me.

>>17746770
He sometimes gives me money for Christmas/birthday but other than that no. In fact, I can't really think of a single time he ever did anything like that.

He has always kind of expected me to just want a relationship with him. Even when I was a kid he would get really upset if I wouldn't call him but wouldn't return my calls.

>>17746764
You're a faggot.

OP as a grown adult, who has continuously put in good effort and faith, you do not owe your father anything. It is not your fault that he couldn't get himself together and grow up. If you are tired of his game of cat and mouse, I suggest you lay it out on the table. Give him a call, ask him to hear you out, explain how you feel, and tell him you don't want to cut contact but you're sick of it, you're 23 now, you've had enough. If he doesn't improve with time then take a break, cut contact for as long as you feel necessary, and when you're ready maybe talk to him about how he's feeling and if he thinks he can actually commit to being a father for once.

My mother's treated me like shit for a lot of my childhood, I cut contact once I turned 19 for 3 years. We have started talking again, and although things aren't perfect, they are improving and getting much better.

Sometimes people need time to think, im sure your dad's intentions are sound but his actions are not.

>>17746756
If I was in your position, I wouldn't say anything to that.

This is not a healthy relationship, it has never been a healthy relationship, and considering you seem to be doing just fine (or perhaps more accurately, better) without him, I see no reason why it needs to be made into a healthy relationship. I don't see why it needs to be made into anything; be done with him.

You don't rely on him for anything. He doesn't help you financially, you don't live in his home, you don't work for him - and perhaps most importantly he doesn't provide any emotional support. Nothing about your relationship with him is productive. You don't owe him anything just because he donated his sperm; he has no right to your life. If you don't want anything to do with him, you are under no obligation to contact him at all, and furthermore are not under any obligation to explain yourself to him.

If you want the possibility of a relationship with your father, do what this anon says: >>17746792

If you don't, then don't do anything. Let him be dust in the wind.