Making my Girlfriend orgasm

>>17745870
To the average person, id tell them to watch porn tutorials of eating pussy (plenty of pornstars give pretty good tutorials) but you seem too innocent, so ill just link you to this great guide

http://mytinysecrets.com/how-to-eat-pussy-a-magical-guide-for-evolved-people/

>>17745887
I probably should've included this as well, she really hates oral, I'll still study the link because it could just be that I'm bad at it, in either case, thanks!

There are toys you can buy if she hates oral and are open to then. Body wands are great.

>>17745893
It could also be foreplay

Personal experience here. I could not orgasm for my entire "childhood" (aka until eighteen).

It is A LOT easier for her to make herself climax for the first time than it is for you to make her come. This has to do with several factors, among others that there's less "distraction" (feelings, stuff going on in general) from how she physically feels. So tell her to orgasm so she can grow comfortable to the sensations of building orgasms and orgasms themselves.
I don't know if she has literally my issue, but from what I gather this is semi-common, which boils down to feeling an intensity when you get close that is so new and overwhelming that your body shuts down and immediately turns itself off. I got over this my masturbating in the shower (could not bring myself to keep up masturbating at the same pace, but I could bring myself to not move the hand that held the showerhead) until I literally forced myself to orgasm (which was not a pleasant experience at all), once I got it over with the mental block was gone and I never had issues again.

It might sound weird, but if you've literally never experienced an orgasm you also don't really know what feeling to "aim" for during sex. You don't recognize the subtle signs that one is building.

If she doesn't want to orgasm that's another issue. Not enjoying it much is one thing, but if she feels real resistance this is likely a mental block (negative stigma attached to it that likely also spreads to sexuality in general) that also negatively effects her ability to enjoy herself during sex.

>>17745973
I agree with that. Had the exact same problem.

>>17745973
>if she doesn't want to orgasm
Hurr, I meant if she doesn't want to masturbate.

>>17745973
That makes sense, she doesn't ever really want to touch herself is the thing, so the problem I'm having is determining what she likes, because she can't tell me.

So, should I try and get her to give it a shot alone, perhaps in the shower like you or do you think I'm going to have be a bit of a detective?
Thanks!

>>17745917
it gets worse mang, she said she'd kill me if I got her a vibrator or anything like that.

You're seeing bit by bit why I've decided to consult with the hive mind.

I should probably cover all of this while I'm at it:
>she says she'd never try a toy
>says she'll never masturbate
>doesn't really like to change positions during sex, she likes it more vanilla style
>She's also incredibly skiddish, albeit because her parents and siblings are always around which complicates the whole scenario
>she won't try lube or that KY max stuff, i have no idea if that would help, but listing it anyway

>>17746057
>doesn't orgasm
>doesn't want to try a toy
>doesn't masturbate
>doesn't want to try new things in bed
So I guess she just doesn't want to have fun.

>>17746040
I would really encourage her to explore her sexuality herself. You can frame it as you finding it superhot and wanting to hear about her "findings" later if that makes it less loaded than flat out saying you think it'll benefit her.
You can give her cute little commands or write her some erotica about the two of you to inspire her, that doesn't matter, but you cannot do her personal development itself for her.

The issue is that her lack of comfort with her own sexuality is a problem in itself. If you find a way around that you are solving the symptoms and not the root cause. I bet that the reason she can't tell you what she likes is because she is not in touch with her sexual psychology. (Again, I wouldn't have been able to tell you either before I learned how to masturbate and I sure as fuck already had fetishes, I just didn't recognize them as such because I was oblivious to the sexual subtext and the effect it had on me.)

Just telling her to get in the shower and finger herself is entirely unsexy if she does not like masturbating and wouldn't even know what to think of. I would rather just encourage her to explore anything at all. At this point realizing that she finds something a hot fantasy all by herself would be a huge first step.

>>17746061
I think it just makes her feel like a slut, and she's got a very mature mindset which doesn't necessarily help my case. However we go hard on the Friday's when everyone decides to go out.

I will admit, she is a bit prude-ish which kills me because I have a high drive and she has a low one

>>17746072
If masturbation makes her feel like a slut, she's pretty dumb. Because masturbation is what keeps me from being a slut.

>>17746063
>she is not in touch with her sexual psychology
That's sounds pretty accurate

>Just telling her to get in the shower and finger herself is entirely unsexy
Don't worry anon, I'm not nearly that inept, I'll try and ease her into exploring herself more through encouragement and using what little bit I know she likes as a springboard

Thanks for the insightfulness!

>>17746057
>>17746072
I think you are downplaying your conclusions a bit... she doesn't sound prudish as much as she sounds repressed and like she harbors some really unhealthy ideas about sex. That is likely deeper than what you can solve by being an encouraging boyfriend.

>>17746074
She's a bit of genius unfortunately for us.

She has a small problem making friends, but I think that stems from the mature attitude honestly. Most of her fake friends from high school when we first started her friends wanted to always take her out partying, she'd rather snuggle up and watch fault in our stars.

Don't get me wrong, I love her for it, but I think that's what keeps her from making social connections

>>17746083
You're welcome! It sounds like quite the challenge but perhaps a good way to start is by doing sexy pillow talk. Start out by just reflecting on the sex you have together ("you look so hot when you're on top of me, seeing both your boobs and you looking down on me is so sexy") and move from there to things you'd like to try together and from there to general fantasies you have. Basically try to take baby steps in letting her realize that sharing in the mental aspects of sex can be a great bonding experience and warm her up to the non-physical side of experiencing it.

>>17746086
Maybe, and honestly that could be very accurate on the premise that everyone around her is getting pregnant, like her young cousin and a couple people that live near her

>>17745870
OP. Eat that bitch out. There is no way any girl can't resist being eaten out if you do it right. Giving a girl a clitoral orgasm is easy. The key is to not stop what your doing or how your doing it. If you don't you set your progress back quite a bit. That goes for eating her out and fingerings her. The thing about fingerings your girl is they could get too sensitive. That doesn't happen if you eat her out.
There are a bunch of techniques but what you generally want to do is use your fingers to push up the hood of her clit. That will make it easier for you to get good licks in. Now you want to just lick as long as you can. Your tongue might get numb just keep it up. Don't change positions or kicking patterns. You'll fuck up your progress. Good luck anon.

>>17746096
>fault in our stars
Shit taste

>>17746097
I'm going to be painfully honest here, I may have screwed myself in that department because I'm always calling her beautiful, gorgeous or complimenting her on something, because she's perfect in my eyes.

I'll break the wall a little further, her ass,10/10.

it's so round and shelf like, it could be confused with a globe

>>17746113
Hahaha, nothing wrong with being crazy about your girlfriend, it is less the giving compliments itself that matters but more specifically disclosing how you psychologically experience sex (with her). It is very intimate to share that kind of private experience with your loved one and compare how it feels on the other side so to speak. It might break her own walls down a little bit and make her reconsider the feeling/conviction she has that this stuff is [? not normal/indecent/not for her personally].

>>17746104
I'm a girl's best friend in this regard, I'd eat her out every day of the week if she'd let me, I fucking love it.

I just need to get really good at it is the problem. (along with extreme germaphobia on her part)

Fingering, I know she likes, problem is same problem as eating her out, I'm no Beethoven when it comes to fingers. I have much to learn, I know

Thanks anon!

>>17746105
wasn't a terrible movie, I actually kind of liked it

*spoiler alert: She cried

>>17746135
I just read the book because my friends kept going on and on about it. It was pretty bad.

>>17746137
The movie is supposedly better, I haven't read the book, my sister has and that's her opinion

>>17745887
>>17745973
>>17746063
>>17746097
>>17746104
In Summary of this thread:
>Learn to eat pussy at god-tier level
>Explore her body, make her feel sexy and turn her on
>Pillow talk is the gateway to heaven
>Encourage her to explore herself sexually
>Get erotic

Have missed anything anons?

Thanks for the advice so far!

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Get another gf.
>not constantly afraid of 'sining'
>has massive daddy and/or confidence issues

>>17746164
Just FYI OP, there might be nothing you can do. She is responsible for her own orgasms. My bf could eat me out all day and I'd never cum unless I made an effort (that is, fantasizing about what gets me off). I spent many years without orgasming before I learned how to have one with my partner. If she doesn't know how to get herself off the odds are high you won't be able to either, so don't let it get you down too much.

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>>17746178
I'm going to go with "no" on that one anon.

I'd be very hard-pressed to find someone nearly as good to me and wonderful as her.

Do I wish we were more sexually active? yes
Is it my only gripe with her? yes
Can I keep it in my pants just enough as to not be a psychoactive prick? yes

>>17746196
As long as I can make the best of what I can on my end, I'll be content.

If it's as half and half as you say, I better make sure my half is pretty good.

>>17746126
That's the best mind set to have too. Fingerings is easier to get her off because your fingers won't get tired. But it's easier to screw up too. To much pressure or to little. Too sensitive. Some girls can only get off to fingerings though. It's not necessarily a fail on your part if they don't get off to your dick.

Another thing about eating her out. She's prob going to want something in her pussy too. If you can manage some fingers great. But it's always been to much to do at once for me, so both suffer. Anf if you start with fingers and your tongue and can't keep it all going your going to lose a lot of progress when you stop doing one or the other. So it's best not to even start with both. What I like to do is wait till I see she is close and then use fingers in her pussy right before she orgasms to kick it up a notch. Another solution is to just get a vibrator you can put in there while your eating her out.

>>17746057
im willing to bet shes just not gonna come until yall do it outside her parents house. you're trying to raise the excitation when what really needs to happen is lowering the inhibition. read emily nagoski

>>17746072
why is it mature of her to be prudish? honestly its a little kiddish.

if you admire her prudishness as "maturity" thats not gonna help

>>17746264
She's mature in other ways, I just mean that I believe it's a contributing factor

>>17746223
That's a new idea, I'll have to get creative, thanks!

>>17746252
There's a very good chance this is entirely true, and honestly, you may be spot on. I think once we move out and have our place, the pace may start to kick up.

>>17745870
Try having her lie on her back on the edge of the bed with her legs on each side of her. This keeps them wide. You kneel in front of her. Use the instructions from the previous answer. In this position you can easily reach her clit with your tongue and use your fingers in her vagina. She will be able to concentrate completely on herself. Let her know it doesn't matter how long it takes. Say "that's it baby, there you go" other encouraging things in the beginning.

>>17746283
The Jason Bourne of Cunnilingus apparently just appeared.

Wouldn't stopping to talk ruin my progress though venerable one?

>>17746291
Not her/him but I can attest to the usefulness of sitting on the edge of the bed.

>>17746302
I'll have to try this then, thanks!

>>17746291
>Wouldn't stopping to talk ruin my progress though venerable one?
Not him but yes it will. Stopping to talk to her is only a good idea if you think her nervousness or something is preventing her from getting into it. But that has never happened to me. As long as she isn't trying to stop you she shouldn't have any control over her approaching orgasm. You could put her on the phone with her mother and the pope and if you focus on her clit and don't change styles she will orgasm.

Femanon here. I had a lot of trouble orgasming. I could never get it to happen with masturbation because masturbation just... never worked. It never felt good, and I struggled to keep my head in the game. I'd be trying for an hour or two trying to make it work and some worry or thing I forgot to do would inevitably distract me and kill the mood and I would lose it. So it never worked.

I found it much easier with a partner. It felt better, first of all. It was actually exciting and not just clinical. And having somebody there keeping me in the moment meant I could stay in the moment.

It took a lot of work to make it happen, though. I didn't know what worked, like above anons have said. It took a lot of experimentation and testing and getting close and failing and all that.

But the first is always the hardest. Once you figure it out that first time, you have a plan of attack fro the next. And it seemed to me like the more I orgasmed, the easier it became to orgasm. I started out needed something very specific, but my horizons have been opening up and more things have felt better.

For me at least, oral and fingering at the same time was the magic combination. I recommend you try it with her. Figure out why she doesn't like oral. Is she embarrassed? Self conscious? That sort of stuff can be very distracting, and distraction kills boners.

As for methods, just experiment and try everything. Try fingers, try tongue. Try hard, try soft. Try rubbing, try intermittent pressure.

I also recommend teasing the fuck out of her before you even do anything. Teasing and getting things amped up really increases sensitivity and makes it easier in the long term when you're actually trying for an orgasm.

Also, I heartily recommend lube. Especially if you know you're going to be going for a while. If she's struggling with orgasm and arousal, she will dry up. And drying up means discomfort which makes orgasm and arousal even less likely. So nip that in the bud with lube.

>>17746302
Dont eat her out if shes germaphobic you dick it will turn her off completely. Jesus she likes fingering just do that you idiot.

If she's telling you what she likes and doesnt like them go along with that, dont believe internet strangers over your gf

>>17746315
This is fabulous advice, thanks for all of that, In kind, i'll answer some of the questions in here:

>Figure out why she doesn't like oral. Is she embarrassed? Self conscious?
She's a giant germaphobe, i mean like, we go out, she comes home and washes her hands even though we only held hands and ate dinner kind. (this could be me just be disgusting, i'm not sure, had shit parents)

Now for my own personnel question, what kind of lube, as far as brand do you prefer?

Thanks a ton!

>>17746327
There's more to it than I'm letting on to, trust me, I wouldn't put her in a position that I think she wouldn't enjoy after a bit of practice or that would make here inherently uncomfortable. I'll share this bit of info as extra background:
>we've only done oral for her once, that's my entire experience
We've grown a lot since then, likes and dislikes change over time

Plus, learning some common knowledge could really only benefit me in the long run, don't you think?

Relating this
>>17746330
to
>>17746339
We tried oral over a year ago, so she may be open to the idea. I'm not going to push it obviously, but a proposal can never hurt

>>17746339
Definitely talk to her about it before you try it. I know people say thats not hot but if shes the "wash hands after any possible contamination" type then going down on her could go SUPER wrong.

If she's interested in fingering then why not focus on that? She likes that, she doesnt like head, so focus on what you know she likes so there are less obstacles.

Maybe try head again AFTER she learns how to come.

>>17746330
I don't really have a preferred brand. But my guess is you're going to want something water-based (doesn't last as long but you don't have to wipe it off later, more "invisible"), something without parabens (can cause irritation), and also probably something odorless and tasteless (again, to make it more invisible, can also make sex more pleasant)

Be careful with flavored lubes. You want absolutely no sugars of any sort around the vagina, as that encourages bacterial growth.

If she's a germophobe, maybe use mouthwash and wash your hands first? It is a safe practice to have. Most people don't do it, but it is safer.

>>17746358
*make oral sex

>>17746353
You have many points

as far as fingering goes, it usually happens before we do it, and she usually stops me after a couple of minutes and just says to get in her.

I think warming her up to the idea of lube might help in this case, she's usually somewhat dry unless she's been fantasizing all day.

in either event, we're going to talk about it, I already told her that we're going to try and figure out how to make her orgasm, she seemed to like the idea a lot (why wouldn't she?). She may be open to more ideas with that having happened

>>17746358
i usually wash my hands and brush my teeth ahead of time, i worry mouthwash might somehow irritate her, y'know because of the strong alcohol content.

Thanks again!

>>17746366
You can touch her clit while you're fucking her. The fingering can go on during the sex.

Are you touching her clit when you finger her or just in'n'outing?

>>17746375
in'n'outing

I've tried that before, but I think the lack of lube was hurting her so she was a bit irritated

I think lube will be part of the key for achieving success

>>17745870

Bro, fuck her real deep and rub her pussy hard at the same time, and you'll see her squirting all over the bed. You'll thank me later ;)

>>17746380
This isn't the hard part, it's waiting for the house to totally clear out to fuck her hard that becomes an issue.

When we can, we go hard, it's just getting her finish is where this thread begins.
Let's be honest, it's very hard to have a girl finish before you do by just fucking, I wish it were that easy

>>17746380
on a related note, do you find that going no fap makes you last longer?

we're usually going at it 6 - 7 minutes on average

>>17746379
Would she be willing to touch herself while you're fucking? I know that she doesnt like masturbating but this is kind of different bc you're there?

>>17745893
My wife of almost 6 years used to hate oral with a passion. Turns out that all of her ex-boyfriends sucked at giving head. Now she asks me to eat her out whenever she feels like cumming really hard.

As for how-to's; every girl is different. Some might have really sensitive clits, while others might like it rough. In my particular case, she likes it when I pummel the clit directly with my tongue; she's not sensitive at all, which is great because it makes my job easier.

When it comes to eating pussy -and sex in general-, it all boils down to gauging reactions. Don't de shy to look at her face to see how she's feeling with what you are currently doing. And if she's clearly into it, stick with whatever you're doing and don't stop till she cums (she might even push you away after she orgasms to revel in the sensation).

I know that talking during sex might be a bit awkward at first, but if you can slowly ease into it, it shouldn't get overly uncomfortable. So get out there, and ask if she's liking what you're doing, or if she wants you to do something in particular like trying a different position or doing something else. You won't probably do this at first, but as you both grow comfortable towards each other while being nude in bed, it will probably get easier.

Remember that, while you may know your GF outside the bedroom, intimacy is a whole different matter. In consequence, take some time to get to "know her" better, and don't rush anything; especially if she's not that comfortable in bed yet.

That's my 2 cents, take it or leave it.

>>17746401
I'll have to ask, i haven't thought of that.
Thanks!

>>17746403
it's 2 cents worth a fortune I'd say

Thanks for the advice!

>>17745870
Easiest way to make a girl cum is too fuck her on her back, so she can diddle her own clit.

Women mostly do absolutely nothing during sex besides get fucked. Make them do some of the work.

From there you can work on making her cum twice. Which is kind of hard to do.

>>17746438
Easier than you believe, my friend. If you've got the stamina, all you gotta do is keep pumping well past her initial orgasm. Said orgasm will link to another and give her quite a high.

Sex is great.

Not OP. But how do I acquire a taste for pussy? My gf thinks it's too dirty to do. She generally cums pretty easy from penetration + finger clit stimulation.

I think shes ashamed because one of the first times I did it to her I gagged a bit. (I have a strong gag reflex for strong smells and tastes). I wouldn't say her pussy tasted bad per say, but it was definitely strong and unexpected. I told her I'd continue, but she didn't want me to.

From then on I think she just felt bad for me gagging on her pussy.

Also what is pussy normally supposed to taste like? This is my first gf so I have no frame of reference.

>>17746456
I've only managed to do it twice. Both times we had been away from each other for along time and were both super horny.

First time she kinda came like a nuke, freaked out and thought she was going to pee, and ran into the bathroom so fast she busted her knee open on the door frame. I never laughed so hard with a boner.

Second time she just spasmed insanely and made me stop thrusting for a bit because it was "too much", then I flipped her over and finished inside her. Fucking aces.

I'd like to get more consistent at it, because it's very satisfying for me. Maybe I should run more to get more stamina.

>>17745870
>>17746396

Fap at least 3 times a week. If you know you're gonna have sex later in the day, fap in the morning so that way you last longer. That usually works for me and we fuck for about 25-30 min on average. She usually cums twice too. And i'm in the same situation as you, op bro. My gf and I have been together for a year and I'm her first everything. I fucked many chicks before her so I'm a little more experienced than her in sexy time. :3

Piggiebacking off of this thread:

making my gf cum once is pretty ez. does any1 have tips on how to not cum fast as a guy while pumping? I've tried to pull out to cool down a bit, but any time I do, sliding out makes me cum and the other thing is that the pussy is so good that to stop myself before I start, id have to pull out every 5-6 pumps unless im super fatigued

>>17746490
Deathgrip you dick so her pussy feels like nothing in comparison to your hand

>>17746465
Well, by stamina I actually meant endurance, as in not cumming in 10 seconds. If you can hold out until she cums, while still not near the edge yourself, then you're pretty much gold to give her multiple orgasms.

I find that it helps to think of nasty shit while I'm fucking her to get my mind off cumming. And whenever I wanna release I just look down to those glorious bouncing tits as I fuck her and let myself go. I fI just take in the sights from the get-go I wouldn't even last 5 minutes.

To each his own I guess. Good luck my friend.