So, /adv/ would you ever date a single mother? Why?

>>17710727
I'm attracted to a single mother, and she's younger than me (I'm 27). We have a similar sense of humour and she's real fiery, takes zero shit and is the exact same height as me, everything that I want in one package.

What I'm trying to say is that I don't care if she has a kid, I'm into her and I feel no stigma for dating a woman who has a kid with another man. However, I'm also aware that the kid will always come before me so that puts me off, which is hard because I'm really into her.

I think it depends on the person entirely. If she's someone you're really into, then what's the harm? I hear in America if you're dating a single mother it means you're a cuck, but ignore that, it doesn't make you any less of a man (and people who say that clearly don't talk to a lot of single mothers, or women at all, probably.)

So yes, I would, but it's a tough decision to make.

I dated one and eventually married her.
Been together almost 9 years now.

>>17710727
The anon above me sumed it up pretty well.

Do you REALLY like her or just like the fact that she gives you attention.
Given the fact she is kinda desperate because of her situation makes you secure.

If you like her for real give her a chance.

>>17710789
I dated a single mother for a year and it was cool at times and other times it sucked. It also ended in an absolute train wreck and I don't recommend it if you are young and can avoid it. I'll give you reasons why it's a bad idea.

1. No matter how long you are with her, how much you try to treat her kids like your won she will always put them above you. That's the way it should be really but after I while you will feel like you want to be part of the family too, but she will always put her kids first, then her friends, and you'll be sick of picking up the scraps of time she has left.

2. Baby daddy drama, alot of time the babby daddy will cause trouble for you both, and single mothers tend to never really get over their baby daddies.

3. In the event you get attached to her kids and it doesn't work out you will be extra heart-broke. I got attached to her kids and they got attached to me, then the girl left me for another guy and broke my heart and hurt her kids. I had to get over her and the fact that I would never see her kids again who I cared about alot.

4. Single moms tend to be damaged goods psychologically and they can be hard to deal with at times. They have walls built up and make you pay for the mistakes of their baby daddies and other guys. If you aren't patient and don't have a backbone they will try to run you over.

Other than that man I don't think it makes you a cuck if you date one. It does make you a cuck if you date one and let her walk all over you or put you as a last priority.

>>17710810
The part when your heart broke a little more because of the kid made me sad :(

I hope that some day you get to be a good father.

>>17710819
Thanks man I mean it's been a while and I'm over it but that is one of those things that you never really are the same after. She came home one day out of the blue and told me to move out. Completely random, never told me why, and never let me say by to the kids. I never saw them again. I'm laying out the risks, but hey it works out for some people. Look at that guy who has been with the single mom for nine years now. :)

>>17710727
Probably not but you take what you can get so who knows

>>17710810
did it too and you provide an excellent summary

Every one is relevant but guys need to really pay attention to where you land in the pecking order, LAST. So very true

I'm not trying to fuck the kid, the fuck does it have to do with anything?

>>17710727

Single mothers are almost always nothing more than pump and dumps.

You don't want the baggage involved with it and even though it goes unsaid just know that nearly everyone looks down on the poor beta whose with a single mom and her mixed kid.

>>17710727

nope.

im gay.

>>17710856
Why it got to be a mixed kid? But you are right alot of single moms do have mixed kids. The one I dated didn't though thank god.

>>17710858

>at least i wasn't an interracial cuck

seriously tho

>>17710867
Hell yeah that would have been bad lol.

Seriously tho, Single mom's are basically good for pump and dumps. Don't get committed and don't get attached.

Oh and if they play the, "He cheated on me!" or "I was being abused!" cards, ignore the shit and don't give them sympathy. If they were cheated on or abused there was likely a reason that another man got to that breaking point and if they just fall for dating scumbags then it shows they have terrible decision making skills.

Also, this is a personal observation but I've never found a single financially responsible single mom so if you get committed her debts become your problem.

I had the opportunity to date two single mothers over two years. Both older than me, the first one had two children and was a mess of lies and deceit. I didn't even know her real name until I had seen her months later after our whole shebang. Second one lead me on and then went on a date with another guy.

Most I can say from my experience is that single-mothers, young ones anyway, are extremely horny women.

The guy I'm dating's ex was a single mother. Is it really awful that I see him as less of a man for raising another mans child?

>>17711355
He's more selfless than he is logical. Whether that's a good or bad quality is for you to decide.

>>17711367
He went into debt supporting his ex and her daughter. even though he raised her from age 3 until 9 she would still always say 'you're not my real dad!' when he asked her to do anything. Her real dad didn't want to know. Now I'm having to help support him because of his financial issues caused by his ex and her kid. If I bring up that she's not his real daughter he looks pretty in pain.

>>17710727
If the relevant shit like her personality and looks are appealing, sure.

Though I doubt the personality of somebody who thought it was a good idea to have a child so early (20-28) with a shitty father at that, would appeal to me too much.

>>17711375
Well, kids at that age tend to be annoying little faggots, specially with shit parenting from the ex and the ex's ex. She'll be able to appreciate what he did when she grows up.

Besides, you're doing the same thing he did now by supporting him, so clearly have a similar mentality.

>>17711401
He doesn't really have contact with the kid any more. He did at first but his ex won't let him now. Probably out of spite because he started seeing somebody else. Not being his child, he doesn't have any legal rights to her so if the mother cuts contact, thats it.

>>17711431
Well ... that sucks.

>>17711355
You are a bitch, and a stupid one to boot!
If he loves another man's child so much, imagine how much he will love and care for your child (with him).

Dating a single mom. Love and care for her 6 yr old daughter (100% custody) like my own. My daughter is 7 (50% custody). Girls get along great. Her family loves me and I respect them. Turns out I let her walk all over me. Realize that I am her last priority within one year of relationship. She wants to go out dancing all night and wants me to babysit. Told her Imma disappoint and that we are done. If I don't respect myself, why would anyone else?
Feels good to get it off my chest

Now to OP's issue: A kid has to always come first. I told every person I have dated that they will never be number 1 in my life and that I would want them to feel the same way if they have a child. I have dated both single moms and girls with no kids. I think it is very hard for someone without kids to understand what goes on in parents' head. Proceed with caution and super extra patience. From what OP is saying, I don't think it will work out with OP and the single mom he is dating. Better not to prolong the suffering for everyone. Get out now, move on and let her love on.

>>17710727
Were I ever to date again, I would be a single (divorced) father. So, yeah. I'd get all Brady Bunch.

Parents understand the shit that parents have to do better than people who don't have kids. So I would automatically have things in common with her.

I married one, and I do not recommend it.

a lot of men use that excuse a lot, "she'll put her child first" as if it's a negative. it's interesting and odd to me because as a mother and a wife, i put my child first. a lot of other women have told me they do the same and theyre either married or have a bf.
so regardless if the kid is yours or not, your woman will never love you as much as the kid she birthed. unless she hates her kid and that type of woman who you should really watch out for.

>>17710727
nah thats a dealbreaker
i dont like dealing with kids
they generally annoy me
especially if things would get serious
i fuck single moms sometimes though

>>17710727
Of course I would, just like I would fuck any other attractive chicks I could during this relationship too, given she's probably too busy dealing with her spawn and all that.

>>17710727
I "dated" two. both were pro-life but still chose to slut around when they were teenagers and got knocked up by some deadbeats. both had terrible judgement in general and worked shitty jobs and appreciated any attention from guys who disappeared the first moment they heard about the kids. both put out and sucked and fucked like the relationship depended on it, which it did. both were dumped when it started to get serious and i slapped myself for fucking some dumb bitch with kids.

use birth control or better yet dont fuck random guys youre not in committed relationships with who wont stick around.

>>17710727
Is this a test to see how many percents of men giving advice here are cucks? that's a good plan, It's obvious that we take any advice here with a grain of salt.

File: gOsM4AV.png (1018KB, 906x679px) Image search: [Google]

1018KB, 906x679px

>>17710727
no because being a cuckhold is not my sexual reproductive strategy. guys who date single mothers could not get a normal girl of their own so they had to resort to cuckolding in order to reproduce. they usually have another kid with the single mother but they cucks for raising an offspring from a different father.

>>17710727
You'd have to be a very good father.
T. Son of a single mother

>>17712647
Oh, another REALLY important thing. Don't fall for the buzzwording /pol/ virgins who keep on ranting about how dating a single mother would make you a cuck. My stepfather has way more balls than my stupid asshole father which most of this board would define "alpha".