OBJECTIVELY

>>17705234

I didn't have parents while growing up. Life is the streets was tough, but thanks to catmama, I was always clean.

The key is to make sure you put enough saliva in each lick, practise wetting your tongue nicely and then lick yourself starting from the mid of your togue, to the very tip.

Being flexible helps too!

wtf are you two talking about??

>>17705234
I like to use water...and soap.

>>17705234
1. Take off clothes.
2. Stand under shower and get wet.
3. Rub soap (or shower gel) all over.
4. Stand under shower to rinse soap off.
5. Turn off shower.
5. Dry off with towel.

>>17705234
Do your hair first, right at the start. Otherwise you'll get the dirty shampoo and rinse water all over your body which you've just cleaned.

Next do your face with a washcloth. Be sure to do in your ears, behind your ears, and all the way round your neck.

Then switch to a sponge or one of those net bag things to do your body with. The optimum order is to arms and hands - chest and stomach - back - legs - armpits - feet - dick and balls - ass. Leaving the dirtiest bits until last means you're not "cross contaminating" yourself.

Lastly is the rinse. If at all possible you want to take the shower head off of the rail and hold it in your hand. You need to make sure you get every last trace of soap off, otherwise you're not cleaning yourself, only moving the dirt around a bit.

>>17705234
I bathe from head to toe, with the exception of my genitals and butt. Those 2 are last, in that order.

>>17705234
Do a handstand.