how do I find my masculinity /adv/? I don't feel very masculine,

Any anons relate? :(

>>17703058
get /fit/, lift like your life depends on it
endure hardship, struggle, and suffering without being broken by it
learn to build/fix things
engage in hand to hand combat and emerge victorious
just a few suggestions

>>17703058

i think the issue is that you equate masculinity with respect.

some of the most masculine guys you meet aren't taken seriously at all. they're considered idiots. being uneducated is considered somewhat masculine, in the redneck sense. others might find intelligence masculine, but only if its puffed up by other masculine qualities and used to do something like, running a business.

in some cultures celibacy is manly. in others its considered more masculine to ravage as many women as possible. did you know some cultures even consider beards to be girlie?

my point here is that there is no real definition of masculinity. ultimately the only thing we can all agree on is that its /not/ manly to just do what everyone else says or wants for their approval to feel ebtter about yourself. that can be almost universally agreed upon.

therefore masculinity is a personal relationship. if oyu want to look more manly, go work out. its that easy. but if that sounds 'too hard' well thats why you're not masculine. you're not wiklling to work for what you want.

>>17703252

Lifting weights makes me realize how weak I am and how small I am. It doesn't make me feel manly at all. In fact I often feel like a broken man in the gym, surrounded by these hulking beasts.

I'd like to learn and bulld and fix things but I don't live anywhere where I'd need to do that sort of thing. Nor do I have friends who engage in these pursuits. I'd be happy to work on a car or start a DIY project.

>>17703266
>my point here is that there is no real definition of masculinity.

I highly disagree. I think this is a thing feminism is trying to do away with but there are likely man traits shared in common that typical masculine men hold

>only thing we can all agree on is that its /not/ manly to just do what everyone else says or wants for their approval to feel ebtter about yourself. that can be almost universally agreed upon.

But that IS me. I am approval seeking. I do do what others tell me. I don't know what I'm doing...like..ever.

I feel like a failure of a man.

>>17703324

>i disagree

that doesn't make you any less wrong. each culture has its own concepts of masculinity, and even in your own country there are conflicting ideas of what it is. You can't please evferyone, and to try is arguably the least masculine thing you can do.

>but i am approval seeking

so stop doing that. define yourself, not your masculinity.

accomplishments

set goals, work toward reaching them, keep at it even when it seems like you're not progressing at the pace you were wanting or expecting, and see it through to the finish

you're unsure of yourself because you've not shown yourself what you can do yet

manliness has many facets. one is sureness in oneself.

>>17703321
>all these excuses
this is the root of your problems

>>17703058
You can turn into a bottom for gays. You pretty much just described how they are.

Alternatively, you can work on your self esteem and confidence. The other stuff should come naturally.

File: 1462827418231.jpg (184KB, 1118x699px) Image search: [Google]

184KB, 1118x699px

>>17703337

>>17703329
>>17703329

Do you really think masculinity is relative?

I guess I'm just not a very self assured person and it sucks :(

>>17703058
Maybe you just arent born to be so. I have seen many women act like a stone cold masculine man. I have seen many men that act like little princesses. Calm down and eat