Thread replies: 6
Thread images: 1
Thread images: 1
Anonymous
Emotional Detachment/Trust Issues 2016-10-23 21:26:02 Post No. 17697171
[Report] Image search: [Google]
Emotional Detachment/Trust Issues 2016-10-23 21:26:02 Post No. 17697171
[Report] Image search: [Google]
File: 866b9cfd9aee6962cfa36b7067ed20ff.jpg (9KB, 480x375px) Image search:
[Google]
9KB, 480x375px
Long story short, because of my terrible home life growing up, and bad experiences with close friends/relationships where everything fell apart, I don't understand what it means to feel close to someone and value. I consider all my relationships, regardless of their depth, to be extremely temporary, so I don't really become emotionally invested in having these people I care about around.
I've gotten around this by thinking "even if they're only here right now, and later they or I will change and i won't have this again, I'll always have this experience/memory" and that's gotten me out of my shell.
But it doesn't work when I meet someone I like, want to be close to, and want to have in my life. I just shut down and retreat into myself emotionally.
Anyone with similar experiences? What's the workaround?
>>
I wish I could help, brah. I've had the same shit happen to me, but I cope with hookers and vidya...
>tfw so ronery.
>>
>>17697204
Hah, I tried coping by getting a hooker.
Couldn't get past the notion I was dehumanizing her, so instead of the 35 minutes of shameful sex I paid for, I had a full-blown personal conversation about her life and dreams for 2 hours.
>>
bump because i feel this
i find dude that you need to try hard to trust people, and trust what the people who love you say to you about yourself
it takes a long time. it might help to improve some other areas of your life too. like exercising or picking up a hobby or just reading a new book or something.-- whatever will make you happy
godspeed
>>
>>17697171
i know this feel man
wish i knew how to fix it
>>
>>17697171
Let me tell you a story. Bear with me - it WILL be relevant.
Do you know how handshaking began? In the Middle Ages knights in armor would indicate their trust and friendship by taking off a metal glove, knowing that the other guy could cut off their hand at that point, but showing their willingness to take that chance, as a sign of trust. Two knights both taking that chance would take each other's exposed hand.
The moral of the story is that ANY attempt at closeness, be it friendship or love, involves the very real risk of the other person injuring you, but the only way to achieve the goal of intimacy is to take the chance.
In this life you are going to meet knights - friends or lovers - who are going to cut your hand. But you have to keep taking that chance.
Thread posts: 6
Thread images: 1
Thread images: 1