you know what this thread is for.

I want to fuck pewdiepie

I'm keeping my guard up, I'm doing my best not to get attached again. I've also got my eye on a guy that may start shit

I don't have time for people stealing corporate documents to check up on me. between running the current project that's over deadline thanks to others hired on the project and not subcontracted under me, growing a client list, starting a second business and the R&D involved, and coming up on tax prep season, I really don't have the patience for this bullshit or any of the other bullshit that keeps coming this way. act on it or don't, either way you should know there is zero tolerance or attachment, I'll send family to jail and not lose any sleep over it.

get out of my way.

My homesituation kills me and i'm too depressed to talk about it

>>17696995
I want to buy a Samsung SSD but not sure if I should wait until the holiday season to see if it might drop a little.

I want to draw a comic, read a book and eat a pussy!

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This girl named Vivian has made me feel so many thing and I don't even think she know who I am, how do I even begin to talk to her?

>>17697033
I would wait till the holiday sales if you don't need it right away

>>17697017
not to mention, my personal tax info was backed up to that drive. you just landed yourself in a few felonies. it's alright, I learned to be cold and manage attachments from the best and it means that any move you make, if it even has the slightest hint of intent to negatively affect me, is going to be met with whatever it takes to take you and anyone associated down.

don't mistake things and think I won't take care of this with extreme prejudice.

I fucking hate PMS cause I'm always calm and try not to get upset and then PMS happens and I turn into a raging bitch and honestly I just want to shoot everyone

>>17697099
I highly doubt I'm the girl you're talking about (I'm a neet shut-in) but it's weird to open a thread and see some talking about my name (which isn't a common one)

Went to the badminton club to see if i wanted to join but it just was not for me, trying to find a more social hobby but i just cant find anything that suits me.

>>17697028
Likewise.

I've had a job for over a year. I told myself that I would be disciplined and save enough to move out. I should have been able to but I wasted money on shit for the sake of temporary happiness. I know saving enough to move out would have made me thousands of times happier but I just lack motivation. Intellectually I know it would be better but I've gotten so used to constant misery I'm almost dead to it.

That feel when can't even read posts over 5 sentences long anymore.
Damn I'm turning into a lazy ass. Help me /adv/

Get over it!
You havent given up because this isnt for you! If it was, you would have said fuck it and gone to bed already, like the concert, or the sf trip.
I cant even be a bloody adult even when so much is at stake!
Why the fuck am I like this?

You are blind because you are sensitive.

So what if that makes you a cry baby? You see things others dont and miss things everyone sees.

Hopefully, I havent completely fucked things up.

>>17697177
You live in Michigan?

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I am 23 years old, extremely lonely, kiss-less, handholdless virgin.
All my peers have relationships, majority of my cousins have families of their own already (and were in a stable relationship at my age). My god damn younger sister is in a stable relationship, and on a fast track to getting engaged. She and her boyfriend have a friggin dog and live together for crying out loud.

I have come to accept that I will never be able to achieve any of the above.
I am socially inept, ugly, fat and insecure, struggle with depression, have no clue what I want out of life, and at this point, I cannot even fanthom myself having a significant other.

It is painful however, as I would like to have a family of my own at some point, as I like children, and find their company enjoyable, but alas, it is not to be.
I wish I could just die, but I don't want my family to be tormented if I offed myself.

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Things went well with P today, man it feels good to finally talk with someone as crazy as me, i think i can make this happen, i just wish we could go to the same school, so far she seems single, i hope that's the case and i can make a move at the halloween party

>>17697099
>>17697177
>>17697263
awww, things are getting exciting... possibly a meet-cute

>>17697281
First of all you need to gain your self confidence back, get a journal and write all the positive things (can be anything,even if its something as simple as a 20 minute walk) you did through the day in it and read them before you go to sleep, the reason you have low self confidence is because you mind focuses only on the things you do which you percieve as bad even if they are not, the journal will train your subconcious to focus on the positive.

>>17697309
Easier said than done. There ain't many positive aspects in my life, and I don't really have the energy to start keeping a journal. It would become yet another obligation to me, and drag me down even more.

>>17697399
If you want something in life you have to either work for it or you can feel sorry for yourself there is no third option, MAYBE therapy could help just maybe.

>>17697420
I am going to therapy already.

>>17697263
Maine ;-;

>>17697306
I have dishonored you anon

i have a gf and im so ashamed that i want to fuck dogs

My mother abused me repeatedly as a child and I can't heal- it impacts with every single aspect of my life.

>>17697440
You dont live in Aroostook do you?

>>17697440
No dishonor- with you on the hormones btw. They make me think I'm bipolar sometimes

I only attract men, specifically bottoms, and I have no idea why. I am not bi or gay, I tried it and I did NOT get into it. This is a vexing thing.

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>>17697440
Damn vivian im trying to get looks kinda like pic and is kinda how you discribed yourself ahh, one day

I finally dropped out of the Computer Science class and the major, which is awesome. Still not sure what I'm going to do for a major since everything is either too difficult or too risky in terms of jobs. I think the friendlessness is really starting to get to me after all this time. It's just impossible. I see all my relatives/family friends and people around college laughing and enjoying each others company, and I just want to jump out a window. I really can't imagine having friends, let alone having a girlfriend. I've just been rejected so many times over the course of my life, eventually I have to accept that it's me not them. My therapist wants me to try talking to people or to go back to the literature club, but I just don't know if I can do it. I don't even have any online friends. I just want at least one person I can talk to or just play video games with every now and again or something. I just don't know anymore.

I had an amazing ex boyfriend who I cheated on once with my ex and twice with my dad's roommate. I told him about it a year after we broke up. I didn't even realize how awful it was until I told him and said it out loud.
I'm an awful person. I hope by being aware that I can change.

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I just... I want to meet a QT white girl, but they are so hostile towards us Indian gentlemen :(

[email protected]

been dropping this in a few threads, just want to talk to people feeling the same way.

I'm not feeling so good lately. i've inadvertently turned myself into a solitary man

i had a chance with a girl, or maybe i imagined it and she wasn't serious, but i may have had a chance and i turned it down because i don't smoke or drink or party

I'm failing college and I have no idea what to do now. No other college will accept me and I don't know if I should start over.

What's worse is that I'm afraid to tell my parents for fear of them getting angry and really nailing the final nail in the coffin that is my life. Thinking of dropping out and just holing myself up somewhere and just die out.
Just feel like shit right now as reality sets in that I'm a failure.

The older I get, the more depressed I become.

I am starting to lose my ambition and strong work ethic.

I now realize that I lack talents which I once thought I had.

I am becoming a more petty and materialistic person.

I am starting to care too much about looks/aesthetics/fashion, but I am dirt poor and can only shop at thrift shops.

I have never made a strong connection with anyone and have never been in a serious relationship. I have also never been in any sexual relations my whole life.

The girls I love is dating another man.


I am too content to change anything about myself or my situation.

My life is pretty empty right now. I'm In a fair amount of debt, cc and student loans, I'm failing my classes I took for prep for grad school. I'm struggling trying to forget a girl, and I've pushed all my friends away cause they bore me. And I live at home with my mom. It all got to me and i tried to kill myself and am back on meds and therapy, something I haven't had for a while.

I'm losing all motivation to keep trying. No matter what I do I still feel empty and eventually fuck it up. Currently I'm pursuing a job that will get me out of home for a few months and get me some decent money which I'm hoping to pay off some of my debts and use the rest to move somewhere far away from my current life and start over. It's just I have to get the job, and have to wait for it to start. The more time goes on I'm doubting I can do it. I'm doubting everything and I'm not sure I can survive anymore if this plan falls apart. Each day goes by and I'm losing motivation more and more. I just want to start over and all my past mistakes make it hard, when I know if I could get out of my shitty town it would help me mentally so much.

>>17697577
Has anyone emailed you?

>>17697612
one person who hasn't said anything to my reply

>>17697529
no, formerly Cumberland, now Lincoln ;-; 0/2

>>17697497
Ah yea I'm swinging between crying and wanting to punch things in angry and I'm begging it to stop haha and it's ONLY DAY 2 HAHA

>>17697486
Wut

ah HATES niggers

I've been relying on whiskey to help me sleep since my dog died about a month ago.

I've told no one I'm drinking, and only family knows about the dog. Kept that from friends and colleagues.

Every-time my family tries to make me talk about it, I break down. I lost my best friend, my intentionally disobedient, friendly, loving dog that wound me up just as much as I wound it up. It breaks my heart each morning when I wake up and can actually move my feet because he isn't lying against them.
Every-time a neighbour dog barks I suddenly get my hopes up just to remember he isn't here anymore.

It's been over a month and I'm still in tears each night when I'm finally alone. I'm fucking struggling. Truth be told, he was the only one in the family that made me feel welcome, or a part of the family.

I'm tired, and part of me is screaming at the rest of me; there is an easy solution, either your pain will go, or you'll be reunited.
I'm not going to it it, but the thought is there.

people are mean. they're out to get you. they'll always have something negativity to say. but why? just to make me feel bad? for them to feel superior? i cant change the past, so why do they have to berate me about decisions ive made. and im not even ashamed of said decisions, but for some reason they really like to dig at them and bring them up at any chance possible. i feel like i need to explain my self, but that shouldnt have to be the case.

>>17697539
Just curious, why drop out of computer science?

Lets see what happens tomorrow. I mean I think about you alot "boo" but I don't know if you feel the same....(yeah you said you cared about me but) would you actually be in a relationship with me? or is my age that much of a factor to you?


until tomorrow

>tfw I'm going to college for probably an engineering degree, since my parents will pay for it
>i'm thinking that this is the practical thing to do but at the same time i sort of just want a minimalist lifestyle

To the cunt who flips me off when I drive past you while you're walking your dogs, go fuck yourself. I have places to be and if you want me to slow down to an unreasonably slow speed then maybe you should stop walking when I fucking drive by or at the very least waear some noticeable color so I can see you and slow down before passing. I shouldn't even care but somehow it bothers me that I can't just immediately ignore and forget about it. Also, everyone else I drive by doesn't give a shit except you, and you never walked around before, so go back to where ever piece of shit place you came from, cunt. I have enough on my plate.

I've already determined that I can't go through life by myself, but the woman I love parted ways with me.

I've tried dating other people, I have a girlfriend currently and I still feel empty as fuck and think about this other girl all the time.

We've texted and chatted casually within the past few months, but I don't think she still feels the same way as she once did. Too scared to find out.

Do I let her get away with someone else? Do I focus on my current girlfriend? Fuck why do I have to be unhappy?

I'm not sure how much more of this I can take. Dark thoughts I believed wouldn't run through my head again, they're back and stronger than ever. I might just give up against them. Every day's my worst day yet, and every morning I wonder if it might be my last. I'm not sure how much longer I can hold on. Please hurry, I'm trying to survive this wait, but my grip's getting loose and I'm afraid of falling down the chasm soon.

>>17697766
Last time you caught me at the last moment, just as I surrendered. Please hurry. I know Sysiphus should smile, but it's hard to when he can't find his boulder.

>>17697766
What are your beliefs?

>>17697777
nice get

Maybe I sold do more awkward online social media blunders so I can whatsapp you in apology again and temporarily forget that we aren't talking.

>>17697802
Please do

I am so tired of having anxiety and not knowing how to deal with it. I'm tired of people not taking me seriously because I don't have the "obvious" symptoms of anxiety like very public panic attacks. Or being told that I'll get over it or fix myself if I really want to. Or being told that I don't have anxiety because somebody else has something worse. I hate the fact that people will tell me to just "stop" and being normal. Like I could turn these irrational fears off.

I'd love nothing more than to go out and be able to meet and trust people. I can't even take out my garbage without breaking out in a sweat anymore. My life is going nowhere but downhill and it feels like it won't get any better. Ending it all just sounds a bit more nicer these days.

>>17696995
I really wish my dad was there for me when I was a kid, and in the moment, I really wish he wasn't because that's what helped me become this version of myself. But really, he isn't a good person either. Never was. He told my mom once he'd put her in the hospital if she brought up pensions and shit during hard times. He needs shot in both kneecaps because of all the sick and terrible things he's done and said imo. Nothing physically abusive, just day to day mind games, emotional/mental abuse to me and my siblings and mom, and to me, a bit sexual predatory actions that fucked me up sexually and now I can't talk to other guys lol. Thanks dad for being there. Have a nice life being away from me and my siblings, I hope guilt eats you alive.

>>17697820

I know that feel. My doctors don't take how serious I am about my issues. They just brush it off and say oh get a job, go out meet people. They ignore the fact that I cannot hold a job to save my life, nor the fact that I get so much anxiety doing social stuff that it's crippling.

>>17696995
>23
>Apparently attractive as fuck.
>Go to Halloween party.
>Grab a lot of attention.
>Decide to go for a highschool classmate's 19 year old sister.
>Realize this bitch is way more experienced than me in everything.
>I wanna fuck, but my car broke.
>Can't do shit so I decide to just have fun with her.
>End up making out with her in the dance floor.
>Tell her I suck at kissing but am loads better south of the border.
>She reminds me I have no car.
>Retreat to sofas in club.
>Make out with her as best as possible.
>"You're not the 'worst' I've ever had."
>Eventually she has to leave 'cause curfew.
>(Fuck, I haven't had someone leave due to curfew since I was 19. Oh, wait).
>Spaghettily help her find her male friends I whisked her away from 3 hours before.
>Fist bump her good night.

How bad did I fuck up? We danced for hours and generally had fun, but I'm such a fucking pussy. I'm a god damn nerd in a potentially Chad body. What do?

I don't think you understand exactly just how much damage you've done and continue doing to me. You don't really understand how much was on the line for me, emotionally and paychologically speaking. "I didn't mean to hurt you, sorry for making you waste a year" isn't even remotely in the correct order of magnitude. Please stop hurting me while my wounds can still be healed. Hurry.

>>17697820
Man fuck um all tell yourself you love yourself and you will be ok

>>17697867
>Fist bump her good night.
femanon here and holy cow that's friendzone and a half.

>tfw depression cured my anxiety because I just don't give a shit anymore.
Ha. Ahaha.

>>17697843
Therapists are garbage. Mine would keep telling me to do things until I feel better. ...In other words keep having mortifying social situations until they're not. I wish people would understand that anxiety is not the same as shyness that goes away with experience.

>>17697885
I can't love myself because I'm fucked up.

I noticed last night that I have to sleep with my hips like this: \ because if I don't, I feel nauseous and like something heavy in my lower belly

I think I'm relapsing back into severe depression because I've been greatly considering suicide for the past few days. I'll probably flood my system with carbon monoxide or something of the sort.
But the problem is I have no idea why everything has become so vapid and inane again out of nowhere. Am I just repressing or denying some recent negative incident perhaps??
I can't concentrate or think properly about anything.

>>17697872
Initials?

My grandmother molested me when I was about 8.

>>17697872
Communicate.

>>17697907
I mean, what was I supposed to do?

I JUST made out with her for the first time.

If we had been alone, then fine. Maybe. But in front of her friends?

An hour ago I found out my mom might have brain cancer, cause she went from a mom that had lung problems to a person that can't talk, blind in one eye, is cross eyed, can't walk without help. Now I'm sitting here crying a few states away cause my brothers just text me a picture of her in a shitty helpless state which is something I never seen. Now everybody is texting me to come home soon.

What do I do now? Go home and chill out with my mom and watch movies and not try to cry when I see her and keep her company for a few days?

She's supposed to see a brain specialist soon.

Person noted how i'm so bright and funny, "like the sun" today but the compliment shattered me completely for reasons I'm not sure.

I've always been the class-clown, I'm so insecure about not having anything to offer people except for laughs and I'm impossibly anxious and shy if I cant which makes me come across pretty goofy I feel.

I'm basically dead-weight personality and achievement wise, I just game as a hobby and I'm actually quite shallow I don't think I've genuinely taken an interest in someone and what the think or feel, Its just something I have to listen to before I can say something which I have to say even though I consider everything I say to be complete crap.

I have low self-esteem but people are just potential fucks that I dress up in faux-romance. I don't really care about them, I don't think I care about anyone truly except for my family and I'm far too comfortable being alone, and yet the loneliness is suffocating at the same time.

t. edgy 23 virgin

I just hope I don't get FZ'd by her. I really enjoy working with her and I enjoyed the little amount of time we've spent out of work.
I just hope she feels for me, what i feel for her.
And it seems like that. Unless she's just a very touchy, flirty person by accident.

>>17697872
You're lucky you got that much from the person who hurt you. But I can feel your pain though and I'm sorry you've been hurt that badly.

My best advice would be to cut contact and heal your own wounds. It will be initially more painful but you will get through it. Learn from this and move on with your life. You will be wiser and you'll know the warning signs before you invest your heart in the wrong place again.

Good luck anon.

>>17698167
Better to see her while you still can, mate. Get some closure. Talk about the good times.
If not that, start writing letters.

>many problems to take care of
>think of what to do about all of them
>do nothing about any of them whatsoever
>shit gets exponentially more fucked up as I fail to do something
>still do nothing about it

mioancjiaswmwkjglaunpicojasifoaehfnaojfdahnslckjfahwnkgegba0oswpcilajmwscjefffffNLINGuyfiohasfnALJWhanupjnçgpuhjBNAIjwnguieipej829-3yuh6u3-9ifrm23irw3jt43oi´2u438j924hnu2w34rhuNB#&Q(@Y*_Q(#@T¨JNUEFCHaenFPUAEWHNAUewfHIEWR&#U

>>17698167
God anon, brain cancer is horrible. If it has got to that point where it's affecting her that badly she doesn't have much time left. You will regret not going to see her even though it will be painful for you. I have witnessed the deterioration of a loved one from cancer and I will tell you that it will scar you for life. I'm only telling you to go to her because I know you will beat yourself for eternity if you don't go and she ends up passing away before you can communicate with her again.

If you have to leave to get away for a bit while you're there then do it, there's no shame in it. You have to protect your psyche at a time like this, you don't need yourself falling apart as well.

I wish you the best anon, try to stay strong in these coming months.

i fingered my cats nose on accident for about 3 minutes

I don't trust you. The other guy still says things too relevant to dismiss and you're keeping secrets.

>>17698052
You probably have a medical condition make an appointment with a doctor.

>>17697246
Fuck off L

I fucking hate my ex L. Really loathe her inside and out as a person. Disgusting whore. But, if I knew others were berating and treating her like shit I'd flip out. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's more of a selfish thing and I feel like I'm the only one whose allowed to treat her like shit. Or maybe I still care about her somewhat. Oh well

I see folks of all sorts, mostly black and Mexican people, talking about a sense of community, and I've never had that. It's always just been me, my friends, and my family since no one in my neighborhood talks to each other, and I'm wondering if I've been missing out or if my emotional growth is stunted because of it.

I also believe, despite my good qualities, that I don't deserve romantic love because of the shit that I've done in the past, regardless of how noble my intentions and goals are moving forward. It tears me up inside and I want it to stop, but it never really does.

I'm spiraling down fast. I'm becoming suicidal again ever since they started pushing pills on me again. I'm realizing that I'm a worthless person and the only reason I haven't killed myself is cause it would hurt my mom. But I'm so fucking miserable. I just wish some freak accident would happen and put me out of my misery.

My ex is taking me for an emotional train ride by saying she thinks we may have to get married and I don't know If she's just saying that to get me to stop talking to this girl I'm involved with or if she's serious. I fucking hate her, but love her

>>17698698
>she thinks we may have to get married
Could you elaborate on that? Doesn't make any fucking sense in my mind right now.

Probably gonna kill myself because I can't keep up with my college classes and I can't bear to admit to my parents that I'm not as smart as they hoped I was.

>>17698704
Said she had an epiphany where she always feels this eager feeling and comfort when she thinks about this person she has to text; like she is "really her" and she realized that that person is me. Her words, then she says "we may have to get married"

>>17698718
Okay so I was on Instagram and I was like scrolling through my timeline and then I remembered I was supposed to text someone but I forgot who and so like I was sitting there thinking of who tf I was supposed to text and so like the way I remember things is by how I feel in that moment, like what feeling or comfort or anything I'm feeling and so in the moment I was thinking of who to text I remembered being so excited and eager to text them. Like I got a feeling of complete comfort, like I was totally me. It was the most welcoming feeling and then it hit me and I remembered who I was supposed to text and it was you

Her exact words, desperately need help

For the past 4 days, what I did to you were always mistakes. I still cannot believe that I did something resulting that "scene" 4 days ago and everything was just snowballing from there. I still cannot believe and accepting the fact that how easy were you from loving me to just plain hating me and just shoot me down.

You were right, the whole thing was doomed from the start. The reality was I just not good enough or the right person for you back then. We lived in the fantasy where everything were right, and you able to accepted me. But I triggered that "scene" and you came back to the reality, and brought me with you. I kept fucked up when talking to you, because I couldn't accepted the fact that it was never right from the beginning.

I'm sorry. The best decision I made was to broke up with you, because I love you and you deserved better. It was me that was hurt the most, because goddamn I'm a pussy. I wished I did better back then, but I didn't. I always love you, and wish us the best, C.

>>17698718
>>17698722
Crazy shit my nigga,
got nothing to say but
godspeed, and be it as it may,
shall you not stick your
dick in crazy ever again.

You're like a tornado and I'm a home without a foundation.

I can't figure out what's wrong with me. I have a pretty optimistic attitude, I have some pretty good things going for me, but I'm just... sad. I was depressed in highschool, and I know what that feels like. This feels different. Some days I'll just wake up sad. It's not like I want to cry. It's something deeper. It's like an intense dissatisfaction with something. Myself? My life? Nothing seems to really go right for me. It just seems like failure after disappointment after regret, never stopping.

My past makes me hurt. I think about all the people and things I've cared so much about, put some much effort into, but today it means nothing. They're all gone, all that energy expended for nothing. Just a big middle finger. How am I supposed to move forward when the things from before haunt me? Would I have been better off if I didn't care? Things are dying all around me. People, places, memories and relationships.

Death. Death is on my mind every day. I think about how I would die. Where, when, why? I think about those few I still care about being taken from me too. It's a reality I'll have to face one day. Who will I leave behind? Who will leave me? Will I still have the energy to shed tears? What kind of man will I be when I fade into the abyss? Will I feel fulfilled, or will it be terrifyingly quick, not even giving me a moment to consider that this is the end. Or worst of all, will I have all the time to regret what a horrible person I've become?

I'm sad. I don't want to cry. I just want it to stop.

I'm a loser. I want to die. I'm holding on for now, trying to get /fit/ and be less shitty at s school for this final fifth year of college. Too bad I fucked up making friends. Fucked up the relationship I had by relying to heavily on its comfort to carry me through depression.

I have to keep going, and I will. Maybe I'll have better luck with friends after school when I get a job and move out.

Doesn't change that I despise myself

I just can't wait for the day when that's no longer the case--when I'm satisfied with how I've improved myself

I want to die

I think it's great that we recognize that we're both depressed people and that we need to be happy on our own terms. I want us to be able to continue loving each other without feeling a sense of co-dependence, which is hard, because it's so easy to get lost in being with you.

You're really great and I wasn't expecting you to come into my life at all. I know there's something seriously chemically wrong with me that I'm not able to appreciate that fully. I'm trying though. I know you're a good thing and I trust you more than the last girl.

I want to take our time and eventually move to a state where we can both medicate legally and be away from this awful redneck culture. It's becoming more and more obvious to me how well we match together and how broken I think I am that I still question the amazing thing we have together.

>>17698823
Initial?

i would have became an hero if i wasn't too scared to do it. maybe it was a good thing.

>>17698832
That is an awfully specific post for you to have any doubt, I guess.

I've accepted that all the functional life skills in the world won't make me a happy person. Just an unhappy one with somewhere safe to sleep.

That's okay. I think I'm more driven, more creative, and, sorry, "better" this way. 99% of happy people don't have a reason to do anything of substance because they're already satisfied.

But being unhappy is still painful.

I can't "grow up" any more than I have: I have a responsibly-sized mortgage, some investments, a healthy marriage, two kids, dozens of patents, and tenure.

I can't tell if I hate happy neighbors for the intellectual reason I state (they are not part of any solution whatsoever) or if I'm just madly jealous. Both, but mostly the latter, probably.

>>17698832

K is current girl, L is last girl

>>17698843

is right, K is probably asleep and if not, we should text because I'm all gay and emotional right now, sorry.

>>17698857

kinda curious about your situation if it's so similar that it could be mistaken for mine.

Well hey, you may have killed yourself without consideration for how I would feel, and without consideration for any ideal or greater thing than your own monolithic misery.

But at least being forced to go back to work 5 minutes after I heard that the man I love was dead planted the angry seeds of socialism in my bleeding heart.

So thanks, I guess.

Also, your cat is still alive.

>>17698087
Put your hand lightly on her lip, lean in and tell her you need to see her again.

Instead... I shudder to think, lol. What looks did you get, after that?

Work on your technique. If you're a good kisser, women always push for more, and they won't care where you are.

>>17698887
*hip, bah.

Hey Sunshine,

Could we please try having a relationship? I miss you and even with two jobs I feel like knowing I could count on you to be there would makes my life bearable, if only for those moments in between screaming residents, babbling breathers, and idiot dicers. Oh, and we could spend every night together getting lit as the daylight itself streaming from the skies...

... so stop choosing to do worse when I know you can do better.

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i just want to say i feel smug as fuck right now, long story short

>go to college
>meet girl that reminds me of an old crush from 3 years ago
>i ask her out 3 times , she rejects me
>Then i confess my feelings because why not and i still get rejected
>months later she starts dating chad looking guy with a cool apartment
>i get a bit depressed,i do cardio lose weight and start lifting
>find out old crush lives here
>i text her, she says she wants to go out with me
>went out with old crush today
>she looks at least 10 times better than the other girl in every way
>post selfie of us together
>everyone loses their shit
>later i stop by at chad's appartment because school stuff
>the girl is basically chad's housewife, now
>but she isn't good at cooking so chad cooks me free food
>talk with chad about halloween party we've been planning at his appartment
>tell him old crush accepted my invitation
>suddenly girl doesn't want any kind of party in the appartment
>leave chad's appartment with a full stomach and a big smug smile in my face

>>17698961
bless you, boy

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The internet's gotten really boring to me. I feel like the only thing interesting to me now is books, but it feels uncomfortable to read all the time.

Anyone else?

I fucking hate uni right now.

I've done everything I can for this fucking essay and what do I get back?

A "you tried" sticker and a tap on the ass for what I've done.

Seriously fucking done with it, can't be fucked going, would rather pay of the debt now and move to somewhere else.

Are there any Romanian anons on here? How's it over there?

I want to be a xenomorph

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>>17698961

I fear that my other personality will take control of me and force me to kill people.

>>17698995
Yea but I personally read news articles in between to keep things somewhat fresh

All of my dreams involve her to some degree... Don't know why

I was ghosted by a girl recently

Basically I met her online, and we hit it off quite nicely, spoke for hours every night for 3ish weeks. Then she stopped responding, but I she would still read what ever I sent.

One thing that sticks out is when she said "I am really glad that I met you."

She also told me about some shit that she has gone through in life. Quite personal stuff.
What could have led to the ghosting?

(she did live one the other side of an ocean for what ever it's worth)

>>17699150
Do male ones exist?

My GF is a bitch that doesn't deserve me but oh lord is she hot as fuck.

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I don't like that we don't talk anymore. I really don't like that all we do is make awkward eye contact when we see each other. I miss listening to you talk. I know you can do a lot better than me. I miss your smile.

I don't know what to do.

I was thinking about finally telling my parents about my rape, but we got into a discussion about rape in general a few weeks ago and they said they don't believe it's rape when a woman does it. Women can't be rapists to them.
I guess I'll just sit on this forever.

I completely hate the way things ended between us. Why did you say those things that caused all of this shit to happen? Why couldn't you just keep it to yourself? You can hate me all you want, I don't care, but you should have known better than to threaten someone's life. Now we can't even speak to each other anymore and I hate you more than I ever thought I could. We used to be so close. You were my best friend. Now you're the biggest regret I have.

>>17699695
My GF laughed at me and said "How can that even happen! haha"

Apparently people don't know that drugs exist.

Going to push that one way way deep.

>>17699707
Damn, they threaten to kill you or somethin anon?

>>17699711
Yup. shit sucks. I wish if I were going to be raped I would have been raped by a man. At least you actually get support and help, and people will take you seriously.
I was coping through repression for so long, broke that wall though and now I don't know what to do.

i have a crush on this one chick in class but she is always with her friends so its impossible for me to strike up a conversation with her

she is moving to the capital next month so i dont have much time to make a move

>>17699716
Yeah, went on and on about it. Now we have a three year restraining order.

I quit smoking 10 years ago and just started again for no other reason that I'm bored with my life. I've been hiding it from my wife and feel guilty but also enjoy the rush of hiding it from her. She caught me smoking at a party and I swore it was my first in years and that I'd stop but I haven't

>>17699723
I don't even remember losing my virginity... I took my medication (that this girl knew about) that makes me very out of it, black outs, ect.

College freshman. Was with a couple friends, the other friend left to go see a movie. I laid in bed because drugged the fuck up. After that it becomes hazy. She climbed on me, I remember saying "what ya doin?'" and that was the last thing I remember. Woke up next day and was told I wasn't a virgin anymore! Yay!

>>17699695
>>17699711
The majority of Feminists I deal with also understand the general shit men gotta deal with.

Such as the law essentially leaving Woman with free reign to do shit like that

I went to college to get a job. Got one in my field right after graduation. Didnt pan out after the owner got arrested for illegal business practice. Spent the next 6 years trying to find something else. All jobs in my field are many miles in every other direction from my location. No one ever hires me. I just work the same shitty part time job this whole time. No bonus or medical or benefits. a dead end job honestly.

I finally move near my brother. I feel happy for once. I still have the same shitty job but I dont mind anymore. I get lucky and someone actually needs my college education and I get hired for their company. I dont get much work however and its not too reliable at the moment.

My brother mentions how he can get me a new job out near places that might actually hire me. How I can finally follow my dreams.

And now I dont want to.
Im finding out im actually really happy and content with finally seeing my family again. Im finding almost all my motivation for years was just because I wanted money so I could afford a nice place and have nice things to attract a partner just so I wouldnt feel so alone. But I dont feel alone anymore. Im afraid to tkae the job now because I dont want to leave again. im afraid to tell my brother this because he sees so much potential for me.

>>17698820
Same

One time in college this dude sat down at a table next to mine in the food court with his friends and then stood up, looked at me, and declared that there were too many ugly chicks around and that they should move to the "hottie" zone.
I learned today that he was murdered a while back.

Hehehehe what a tool

I forgive ya. RIP

I am just about to give up trying to get my General Associates degree, and continue my education. This math class is a bit to new and difficult to me, and I may loose my FASFA if I fail. I am trying my best at learning the material, but nothing is sticking. Plus I am really tired of continuing at it since I am already 27. I keep thinking to myself if I fail I am just going to go back to trade school to finish to pick up a job skill.

>>17699963

I won't lose your FAFSA if you fail, only if you drop because FAFSA are based on units taken. Stop making excuses for yourself. Everyone fails a class.

>>17699742
>>17699746
I'm even a woman too. Girl on girl rape is just never fucking acknowledged or talked about. It's awful. I've talked about it anon online before and I usually get something like "Oh it was just some experimenting chill out". I wasn't experimenting though, I was being blackmailed and held down.

Am I reading too much into eveything you do? I see meaning in every little detail, and even though I know it's probably just my mind being irrationally hopeful, I can't help but repeat your words over and over in my mind. Your stories are not about me, but there's some of me in them. What you're doing nowadays isn't about me, but there's something of me in them. The songs, the texts, everything tells a whole, consistent story but I refuse to let myself believe it, since it's probably just what I want to believe since I don't want to set myself up for disappointment yet again. Please hurry.

>>17700155
I know

Anyone can rape anyone.

Guy on Guy
Girl on Girl
Girl on Guy
Guy on Girl

But the majority of the discussion is Guy on Girl. Thats basically it.

>>17696995
i regret my entire life
committing suicide soon for real this time
gonna buy cheap gun

brain is now damaged beyond repair, can hardly string together a thought, might have hiv, dropped out of college, living with family, 25 yo,

>>17700250
bro, world war 3 is coming, wait until after nov 8th at least, then everyone will have fucked up lives. Get that hiv thing looked at though

I'm sorry, I wish I could have turned out normal.

It's okay to ask your partner to not do something which would make you uncomfortable, right? Even if it's something minor.

I wasn't too satisfied with the way the responded... They agreed so I guess I should be happy enough with just thay. I wonder if I was being unreasonable. But not wanting to be uncomfortable around your lover is okay, isn't it?

>>17700389
Well, I believe your lover is one of those people you should be the most comfortable with, so disregarding your opinions or belittling you for them seems slightly alarming.

I'm in the same boat though, and I've been told that basically it's my fault for being too sensitive towards negativity.

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She messed me up good. It's been 6 months and I still think of her every single minute of every day. Fuck.

I dont know how to progress in life, I dont know what I to do.
I overanalyze every social situation and dwell on everything too long.
Im a little pussy that cries way too easily. I cant control it.
Im physically small because of that dont feel like a true man.
I want to be a true man but Im not.
I have no identity, am I the same as my immigrant parents or am I now a native of my present homeland?
I speak my parents language horribly but ill never be a true native. Ive grown up here but ill never belong here.
I dont belong in my parents country of origin either.
I vomit every second day due to stress and anxiety attacks and am plagued by stomach aches daily.
My insomnia lets me not get enough sleep.

I really hope that I will get the medication for my ADD, otherwise I don't know how I'll make it...

>>17700565
Im weak and have complexes about it.
I have no fun in life, I emulate laughter when it is expected of me.
Im short and cant stop thinking about it.
Ill never make my father proud and make him see me as a true man.
My sister is a insane sociopath hellbent on destroying me.
My mother is probably bipolar and shows it.
My father is a good guy but hes always disappointed in me, in my strength, in my knowledge of our language, in me not being a true man.

>>17700564
Initials?

Dear brother,
Do you know I still have nightmares? Yet you want to get to know me again, after all these years. Now that I'm whole again. I always wanted a brother, after mom sent you away. I would be a fool to believe anything you say, you were evil. But yet, could you have changed? Is it possible to trust you? God, I want to be able to trust you. We shall see I guess.
C

>>17700565
>>17700589

So how old are you and are you school?

My sexuality is shaky now and I hate myself for it. I legitimately look down on homosexual behavior and yet because I was so stressed, I cracked and had sex with another male teen in the university apartments via Craigslist. He kept his face hidden the whole time, and his penis was always away from me. I tried the doorknob to find it was already open, stepped inside the room and the first thing I see was him already naked on the bed. I closed the door, dropped my pants, lubed his ass, slipped on a condom and fucked him doggy style. It was a mechanical procedure and I wasn't even thinking. Then, I flipped him over to fuck him missionary and took off the condom so he could suck me to completion. He swallowed my load, licked me clean, and I put my pants back on and walked right out.

Yeah, I enjoyed it. I wasn't going to do anything I wouldn't already do with a girl. I was sexually frustrated and I couldn't help it.

The knowledge I did this is eating away at me. So is the fact that it took me too long to reach climax so I ended up pounding him for almost ten minutes. We only exchanged pictures of our bodies so at least I'm content knowing this will stay discrete. I can never let anyone know. The guilt is what's killing me and so is the confirmation that if I can't get a girlfriend I would resort to relieving myself as a top for a faggot.

Guess I'm the faggot now...

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>>17700615

Blames having sex with a guy on being stressed. You faggots never cease to amaze me and how the fuck do you fuck a male missionary style?

It all hurts so much inside and there's no escape regardless of what way I look.

>>17700674

Byeeee

>>17700674
Dude fuck off.

>>17700691
>>17700689
What was that all about? I missed it

>>17700712

He said he was either 16, 17 or 18 but was in school. Dumb fuck exposed himself as being an underaged little twit.

>>17700722
oh, okay. thanks

I miss the time before cellphones and constant texting. It's too dehumanizing.

>>17696995
We made each other cum and none of you know. On the living room couch. If any of you guys had woken up even minutes earlier, things would have gotten weird.

She said my cum tasted good, too.

I made a really tasteless joke to a girl at my gym and I realized after the fact she is very likely a porn star I like. I don't know if I should apologize the next time I see her or avoid her like the plague.

just realized the only reason i still have feelings for my friend is because i'm trying too hard to not have feelings for her

like, if i could just completely accept that i can find her attractive without wanting to date her, i don't think i would care nearly as much when i find her attractive

thanks for ignoring me again

I felt like I was gonna puke this morning and that a 10 pound bowling ball is in me. This has been happening for months, sometimes it gets better and sometimes it gets worse. What the fuck has been going on with my body?

being ignored by friends boyfriend co workers boss family. oo yeah its awesome. atleast they arnt talking shit anymore tho.

>>17701382
I know what it's like to get ignored by people, it fucking sucks

>>17701387
right, id rather them tell me to fuck off.

>>17701392
Fuck those people, man, find good people who have mutual respect for you

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Nothing is going well
I still love her, my band can't find a place to play, the political events in my country are making it extremely hard to ingress in a university and i have depression.
Shit...

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>>17696995
I can't FUCKING focus on my schoolwork or do anything AT ALL because all I can think about is HIM. Dear god, I can't remember the last time I had such a hopeless crush as this, but I know this is the first time I've ever thought about relationships and intimacy and actually imagining myself sharing my life with a real breathing human being.

>>17701364
preggas

I'm sorry for the all wrongs I've done.
I should apologize to people's faces but I'm afraid that it would mean validating the wrongs they did to me first, and their continual personal attacks.

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>I will never be able to fall in love with a beautiful short haired girl with a cute nose and speech impediment that makes her not be able to pronounce her r's right but it's OK because it's really cute. I will never fall in love with a girl that loves indie rock even though she's unique in every other way. I will never fall in love with a girl with four pets that almost obsessively loves them to death. I will never fall in love with a girl that likes to cook because it's fun, a girl who lives with her grandma because her parents were drug addicts and she had enough. I will never fall in love with a girl with the same sense of humor as me and even though I know she's doing it because she pities me, she still thinks I look good even though I know I don't. All because i live 1,584 miles away from her.
Why live.

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>>17701714
>Mfw this began in late January
>Mfw it's been about 8 months now
Jesus take the wheel

I love my girlfriend but I really want to get with the girl who I loved before and that loves me back.

I don't remember my dreams very often, but last night I had an extremely vivid dream where I was on a date with a girl. I wasn't even extra suave or having perfect conversation, I was acting pretty much as I would expect I'd act in a real situation, stutters here and there, but I really enjoyed myself. I nearly woke up crying when I snapped back to reality and realized the time I had having dinner with a cute girl with coffee at a cafe afterwards was both the most fun I'd had in a long time and also not real. If I was guaranteed to go back to that place with her I would kill myself in a heartbeat.

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Spent the weekend at a girl's. First date in three years. Was the happiest I'd been in seven years.
She's my girlfriend now.

I'm just happy. All of those manipulative, emotionally damaged people I've been with, and then her...comes from a loving family, is kind, understanding, and head over heals for me.

Thank you, you crazy, beautiful lady.

I really want my ex back. She treated me like shit and I was nothing but nice to her. She treated me heartlessly, never gave me an inch and I never want to go through that again but I want her in my life again. I want her to talk to me again. I want her to miss me.

You're just so fucking beautiful.

>>17701722
if you are preggas, name the kid something awesome for me, like aragon or hercules.
though seriously you should probably see a doctor

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I wish tomorrow was December 7th so I could finally graduate, I'm tired of this shit and I feel like I need vacations.

But then I worry about having too much free time, having to look up for a new job and continue being an adult in general.

>>17701715
People don't attack without reason, unless they're certifiably insane. They're probably still pissed because you're callous and indifferent to the damage you've inflicted upon them.

Andy
you make my tight pussy so wet I just want to pull you over me and let you fuck me hard and rough for as long as you like i cant even contain myself when i look at you and i cant even not write a runon sentence while hearing your sexy voice too bad youre so unattainable like i can hardly breathe

I'm afraid of you falling in love with another asshole.
I need you. I love you.
We can make things right again.

>>17700187
iktfb

There's nothing I want to get off my chest. Life is boring.

Saw this super thick girl today a year younger than me though. She has the same name as my mother, unfortunately.

>>17697577
>because i don't smoke or drink or party
as someone that violated his values both for friends and pussy, it's not worth it. things may or may not get better but definitely won't if you forsake your values that you feel are a curse at this moment.

>>17696995
I feel like shit, moodswings from high to low.
Tomorrow it is your birthday.
I think i'll pass and get drunk instead.
Maybe i'll quit my job too.
FUCKIT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xGuGSDsDrM

you know they played this for me after you did what you did? they laughed in my face but with where I was and where I came from I didn't have anyone else to have around at that time. I subconsciously knew but refused to believe that shit happened. I refused to believe that everyone closest to me hid that, enabled that, and betrayed me like that.

and yet I'm still so conflicted about you. I still only wish you the best because I know you're better than that and i saw that you did actually feel terrible about it even if you never had the decency to talk to me about everything.

this popped into my head on the worst day I've had in awhile and it's really not helping that you still haunt the back of my mind, both in good and bad ways. on the one hand, I hope that you feel the distinct lack of closure that I feel and on the other I wish we could talk and finally bury all this and get to know who each other is today. guess if it's the former or the latter that really gnaws at me.

I really don't have time to spend thinking about this as I'm juggling about 10 spinning plates right now and the distraction is making the balance of at least 3 falter. but you're on my mind and there's never been anything I can do about that when it happens.

cool, take a shot of whiskey and now I feel like I need a long drive to think.

I wonder why it is that I can never think clearly at home, wherever it is. I already know the answer, and now it's adding fuel to the fire that is my already pissed off mood.

fuck today, fuck tonight.

I'm in hell. I must have killed myself with my gun a long time ago. When I put the gun to my head and pulled the trigger it jammed. I don't think it jammed. Ever since then my life has been miserable. I've lost interest in everything. Meds don't work. Therapists just repeat the same stuff over and over again. I tried getting a job and failed at it. Now I'm working an internship that bores me to death and I want to quit. I've reconnected with friends yet still feel so empty. I went to the gym, that didn't help. I'm taking classes and I'm too stupid to do well in them. I got attached to a girl who I thought was my friend but ended up lying to me. I can't even kill myself properly. I've hurt my family because I've become cranky and bitter. Doesn't matter tho it's falling apart cause of stupid reasons. I'm stuck at home despite wanting to be independent, and my future plans to get myself out of my past troubles keep failing. My hopes of grad school are dying cause My financial aid has something going on with it. I truly think I'm in hell and I feel that I'll never escape

>>17702077
>I truly think I'm in hell and I feel that I'll never escape
not with that attitude.

>>17702077
>>17702081
get pissed. and if you can't move toward your goals for yourself because you can't find the worth in yourself, do it out of spite for all the bullshit.

get the fuck up.

>>17702081
>>17702084

How can I find worth in myself if everything I've ever done ends up in a failure. And yes I did fucking try.

>>17702077
if you were in hell, no one would say that >>17702081
>>17702084
to you would they?

someday, you'll look back and almost be grateful for the crucible you're in now because most never go through anything and never gain the perspective that you will.

again, get the fuck up. one foot in front of the other.

>>17702094
because success or failure doesn't make the man/woman. anyone that thinks so is a fool. do you want to be a fool? the answer is no, no one wants to be a fool.

so get the fuck up and move even its only out of spite for the world until you realize you're capable of walking on your own.

>>17702101

Ok so what makes a man then?

Phew okay. I really think im starting to annoy you, probably because im to pushy? ah who knows, I really don't know if you even want to talk to me anymore...but I guess you have your reasons. Maybe when your alone I can finally ask you the question I've been meaning to ask. This is all really confusing for me and I hate that I like you so much

Oh well, we will see what happens. The year is still young

I'm still messed up by a girl I dated 1.5 years ago.

Nothing else to say. I made a mistake and we stopped dating.

I think I'll regret that mistake until I die.
My current life trajectory doesn't have me dating many women
She was perfect. I don't mean she was faultless but she was faulted in the way that I was. I could have loved her and I'm hung up about how true that is

>>17702114

Holy fucking shit you retard. I wish my problems were as easy as yours. Just go exercise and meet new people. And think before you post, some people out there actually have real problems beyond dumb shit like a broken heart.

>>17702116
I'm the same way.
I don't like human contact.

I wasn't abused so I can't relate to you there. I can hear you scoffing at this post already, but there are enough similarities that we can relate.

My mum used to say that she must have hurt me when I was young, because how else could she excuse my behaviour.

It's just how it is.
But you can get used to it

>>17702104
force of will.

>>17702119
Did that.
I'm twice as muscular.

But still, there aren't very many people like me

>>17702110
>The year is still young
wut? it's mid october.

>>17702125

Fair enough

you know what the fucked up part is? you wouldn't be such a distraction if it weren't for the absence. I don't mean that in a mean way, I mean that in a "I wouldn't have to think about it if i could talk about it" way.

I'm not gonna say I need someone.

this is a problem and I know it, but I'm not saying it.

>>17702132
Ha I meant the whole school year. There is still time for me...i hope

I'm feeling deatached. I feel like the only thing sustaining my relationships with most of the people that are close to me is a sense of duty.

My family is broken. My SO is broken. Most of my friends are broken. I dread meeting them sometimes because I know, it's gonna be one of those days and I'll end up trying to solve someone else problems. Trying being the keyword most of the time.

I don't know what I want by this point. If you offered me a one way ticked to anywhere I might leave everything behind and take it.

And more and more lately, I've just been thinking about how I don't really care about what happens as long as I'm not responsible for it. And I feel like shit everytime the thought crosses my mind, because that's no good. I should care for people, but more and more, everyday that passes I feel like I have literally ran out of fucks to give.

And I feel like I love this people, but can't be bothered to care anymore sometimes. And that makes me anxious. Because I know that's no good and I should be being good and shit, but the thought of going into the usual rutine again also makes me anxious and fuck, I feel like there's no way out.

I haven't given a shit about relationships for my entire life, but now that I'm an unemployed college student taking online classes, I have a sudden urge to find a girlfriend and it is making me depressed.

If you ever try to get ahold of me...

I'll tell you to kill yourself.

I love physical contact with anyone and everyone in the world. Like, if some random stranger came up and hugged me, I would hug them back until they'd had enough, and I would feel happier for it.
Fuck, I sometimes brush up against people walking by me on 'accident' because it makes me feel so happy.

You're a fucking pussy.

Why is it so that I feel as if my relationship is formed of one problem/obstacle after another? I mean, relationships are suposed to provide the feeling of comfort and security right? whereas I feel that I'm always the one responsible for ensuring wellbeing. And the thing is, my partner says that he's constantly supporting me, while I don't really *feel* the support. WHy is that?

FUCK YOU
You should be mine
You should be FUCKING mine

>>17702215
me too, i'm an affectionate person

What's the best time of day to floss your teeth?

Maybe it'd be better if I just die so I can stop from this seemingly endless suffering.

It was all an illusion this whole time. I didn't realize how much I did wrong. Nothing to do now but put on rose colored glasses and wait for the outcome. Hopefully by then I'll be on meds and reality won't hurt so much. I fucked up my own life for no reason because I freaked out. I'm the idiot. 4chan adv was the one place I could vent. I felt semi normal behind an anon tag. Rant over

I've been having really disturbing dreams lately and am about to go to sleep. Wish me luck.

>>17702647
Goid luck anon, hope you get a good rest

>>17698714
>>17700250
>>17702583

And all the other people on here who have expressed suicidal tendencies - dang, I'm worried about y'all. Stay strong, you guys. Bad situations DO get better, and you need to be around to see it. When your life is good, you'll be glad you didn't miss out.

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What happened? Are you dead? Alive? Are you ok? You left me with such a open ended message... Idk what to think I hope that you were joking all those times when you said you was going to kill yourself. I hope you're in the hospital like you said you were because your phone goes straight to voice mail ever sense you texted me. Please be ok. If you killed yourself I will die inside knowing I could have stopped it...

>>17702210
Wow that'll show em :0

Kill yourself my dude because we're never gonna go there again. You fucked up.

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>>17696995
>Be me
>In living room with dad, both of us on computers.
>Dad gets phone call, it's a survey about the Presidential Election; hangs up after a while.
>Sits back down, asks if I know who I'm going to vote for.
>Tell him I don't know, that I'm even considering not voting [spoiler]Deciding between Stein and Sanders, didn't want to mention it.[/spoiler]
>Says to me "but you HAVE to vote against Trump!"
>Tell him I don't care for Trump, but that I also have the right to choose who I vote for.

Why does this bug me? In the past, I've voted for candidates who my dad either doesn't like or didn't pick, and when I tell him in passing, he says "you wasted your vote."

Maybe I should fill the circle for the Trumpster just to spite all the whiny liberals whose brains are still in college.

I am so inexperienced and I know nothing

Men who say their wives are fucking annoying but then rely on them to do everything deserve to go to hell.

I dont know how you do it mom

>>17698632
That is not L.

Didn't we play enough games the first time around? Just man up. You can either have everything or nothing, there's no middle ground; all it'd take is three words. I know everything is confusing and almost seems unreal. I know how guilty and unworthy you feel. I know how you're craving for significance, how you want to want to live, but can't really see it. How meaningless everything is. I always meant every word, especially when I told you I know what it's like, even if I can't understand you. I really won't be around that much longer, y'know, so please hurry. Please rely on me.

I used to be free, smart, fun. I met someone a few years ago and slowly, over time he's sucked all my self value. It started as a fun D/s BDSM type kink relationship. It started online and has ended up in person. It's escalated. It is highly emotionally abusive. Constant gaslighting. He tells me I am unattractive and he wants to fuck other people--I still beg to stay with him. I left about a week ago, not by my own will. He completely objectifies me. Told me he misses my pussy, mostly, my mouth, and my cooking. It feels awful...and I still beg to come home. He's always asking my what my purpose in life is. What was I born for? "To serve you, Sir," is the right answer. I feel like I have two choices now. He doesn't want me. So what do I do?
1. Struggle to live a life where I don't get to fulfill my purpose? Or 2. Suicide --I plan to see doctors shortly for help, but I highly doubt they can help me right now. Even if he lets me go home, it's not out of love. It's for my use. I don't feel like I'll ever be loved. If he felt I was worth keeping, he'd still have me.

>>17703344
I'm not a kinky lifestyle person (even though some porn of it is awesome) but a relationship with bdsm should be safe and loving. Please don't go back to that monster, you can find something to live for. He's a piece of shit who deserves his own medicine and you deserve better.

>>17703344
Get away from him and find someone who appreciates you for who you are. If that sounds difficult, it's because it is, but it's the wiser choice.

I stay away from everyone because of what I heard. I've known for awhile I don't have any real friends left. We were pretty much just doing favors (rides to work/ Vidya games) for each other except for like one which I let go of anyway. Along with everything else I just figured it was best to just stay away. I knew I hadn't done anything but it bothered me seeing other people act like that for no reason. It happened so much I figured if I just stayed away it would get better. I'd rather be lonely than be around people who have a second agenda

>>17703356
>>17703360
As recently as last night he asked me what my purpose is. In the same sentence, he'll tell me he enjoyed having me live with him, but only wants to use me. He's currently debating if he wants me home and last night had me beg. I beg every day and I can't stop and I don't know why. I've offered to go as far as surgery to change my body to make him happy. I'm hurting so badly and I wish I had any sense of self but the only voice in my head anymore is his. I know he's a monster, but I can't get away. I need to, for my survival. I've been close to killing myself 3 of the last 4 days. I keep getting drunk and trying to convince myself to OD.

http://www.m.webmd.com/women/tc/polycystic-ovary-syndrome-pcos-topic-overview
This is what's wrong with me, not serious but I couldn't reproduce if I wanted to lol I'm just fat.

>>17703382
People with this can still conceive. You can treat it with birth control, weight loss, etc. I KNOW people with PCOS that have kids.

>>17703381
Human contact not even once

Shit is like meth

I feel empty. Maybe a bit sad but not sure.
Mainly when I'm alone and not doing shit like at the moment.
So I'm wondering if I'm feeling empty just because I'm not doing shit?
Also autumn doesn't make it any better.

>>17703381
You need to see a professional about it.
Also, you *need* to get away from him if you have any dignity and self-respect. This is not what BDSM is.

>>17703526
I don't have dignity or self respect anymore. That's the problem. It's gone. There are people who love me and want me to be healthy, but for some reason nothing else matters to me. I need more than professional help.

>>17696995
I think too much about everything, about all my problems and all the stressfull things, I'm always fucking thinking, constantly, I can't stand it, there is no rest, I'd like to have my mind right and stop overthinking but living and enjoying the present just like all of these people
Fuck I'm so sad and stressed out plus I'm tired of looking for love

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>>17703559
I hope you get better.

I hope all of you guys will feel better and find happiness

I have been doing nothing but what I've wanted to do the last few months and it has been great

I think about you all the time, each day I fall more in love with you again. Now you're home, would you come home to me? You light up the under world that I find inside the shadows

>>17702210
Likewise.

26 m
I feel like I can never get ahead.
I feel like I will always be busting my ass for money.
Im in a relationship that cant go any further unless i decide i want kids.
My whole family has moved away and want me to come live with them, constantly reminded.
I recently switched jobs and every day is filled with anxiety.
I cant decide what i want to do with my life.
Ive been stuck at that point since highschool.
Every little hindrance in my life is so stressful and i cant even help it.

Im afraid my long time relationship is coming to an end because my gf is becoming the typical stupit bitch like every other dumb bitch in the world

It was a stupid idea to take part in that reunion. I fucking knew it was a bad idea but I chose to come, just so I could see you, perhaps for one last time.
I haven't felt such intense emotions since the last time I saw you. I know you're not interested in me, but you are still as beautiful as you were the first time I took notice of you. You still make me feel like a punk whenever I am around you, but I know it's too late.
I wish I was more sober and a bit more welcoming and coherent that day but I couldn't handle it, I already knew the truth yet I took the decision to come and it's my own fault. You make me feel like I could love again.
I hope you enjoyed that night better than I did.

The problem with liking someone you live with who has a boyfriend is that you see them everyday.

Some days she acts like what I do is the high points of her day and she says it makes her happy, and she goes out of her way to try and make my day great. Other days, it seems the only thing she can talk about is her boyfriend. Like fuck, man.

I'm just waiting for Christmas break. I don't have to see her for a month, and I hope I can move on during that.

>>17697309
This is a good idea. I can testify that going on walks is really helpful, as it gives me time to reflect on my day and situation in the nice cool air and quiet surroundings. It makes me motivated to get myself together and make changes usually, and I suspect if I continue on long enough there will finally be enough motivation within me to do something great. Getting off of 4chan for a while right now actually to go for a walk, and I've told friends about my walks and they have joined in and do the same, often with us in groups now. Good luck anons!

This is it. I'm quitting weed. That shit has no business feeling that good for something that has stolen so many hours of my life.

That's the problem. The old addict's addage is true. You can't be a casual user any more if you've been a fucking addict. I've quit it before, and then let myself be seduced by the idea of smoking up again JUST THIS ONE NIGHT. And then you smoke up the next day, and the day after that, until you're a few weeks down the line and you realize you're back to habitual use, despite telling yourself "just once". The addict's motto. Weed, hamburgers, beer, disgusting porn, whatever it is you KNOW you're consuming too much, the old "just once" will fuck you over every day. Until you have to lose it all, because "just once" always becomes "every day". Fuck bad habits, man. Once you have 'em, there's no getting rid of them.

And all because of a lack of discipline. All because I was too ready to just give in to self-pity and smoke myself into oblivion. And now self-pity is all I have left.

i tried so hard & got so far but in the end it doesnt even matter

Re-downloading tinder.

The last time I was on my period, my boyfriend and I were having sex with me on top. His dick slipped out, and a LOT of blood was splattered all the way up his torso almost to his clavicles. He gets sick at the sight of blood, so I quickly moved to try to cover it while he averted his gaze, and we kept going until he finished, with my hands trying to hide the blood. We switched positions a couple times, which meant I put my bloody hands on his arms and some blood got on my body, too, and it was just a mess by the time we were done, and he had to hurry off to the bathroom to clean up as quickly as possible.

My little confession is that I kind of liked it. I'm into pain and have always been curious about bloodplay, but my boyfriend is fairly vanilla and doesn't like going much past a little choking/hair pulling/slapping/pinching type stuff and would, for reasons that should be obvious, never want to try bloodplay at all. But just the sight of it and the feeling of it on my fingers and the way we both looked afterward was sort of thrilling. I feel so gross saying that, especially because it was period blood, but it is what it is. I've thought about it on and off ever since.

My period has started again, and I'm definitely not going to try to make something like that happen a second time because I know how ill it makes my boyfriend feel to see blood, but I can't wait to have sex with him just to see the little bit that will inevitably get on his dick and my thighs.

I feel like there's something really wrong with me that I find the sight of blood so arousing.

I wanna fuckin die

>>17704348
whyboner.jpg

Even though a part of me wants to live, I've been thinking about suicide a lot and been cutting again. I want to tell someone but dont want to worry or come off as emo and think less of me

Any L's here I wanna fuck your ass

>>17704357
>>17704391
Please take care of yourselves. Get help. I'm speaking as someone who was suicidal for almost three years until I started seeing someone for my depression again. Things can get better. And you'd be surprised how accepting and kind people can be about mental health issues. I recently told a lot of people about my problems, and almost every single one of them told me how brave I was for getting help and how happy they are that I'm still here. It's easy to tell yourself people will look down on you, but chances are they really won't. Talk to someone. Find help. Find a way to make it better. Take care.

>>17702917
I feel you.

>be on voicechat with a friend
>don't know how, but conversation turns political
>am already known as pretty right wing
>"you're not voting for [local far right party] are you?"
>I fucking hate this viewpoint
>"what would be the problem with that?"
>friend launches into big tirade about said party

I couldn't even get a word in edgewise. Loads of people have such a fucking hateboner for this party that they can't even talk about it rationally. Dude was just shouting a bunch of poorly made half-points at me. Never even asked me what I was going to vote, after that. I think he might have taken my scepticism for confirmation. But that would just illustrate exactly my fucking problem.

>>17702210
oooooo, aren't you just so big.

>>17702257
well you are what you eat.

you thought I was fucking your girl so you did a whole bunch of fucked up bullshit and *tried* to ruin my life. fact of the matter is, I saw you as a brother and have more respect for other people than you could understand, so I was never going to do that... as much as I wanted to destroy her and as much as she wanted it.

you doing some fucked up shit doesn't mean I'm weak, it means you are. it doesn't mean that I fucked up, it means you did. btw, she was fucking someone close to you, but it wasn't me. I just didn't have proof so I didn't bring it to you. you fucking weak cuck.

I keep giving in and cheating on him. He doesn't deserve this but I need sex and he needs porn, such a sexual mismatch yet amazing every other way.

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I suffer from borderline personality disorder (BPD) and I don't want a future child to go through what I have gone through, and that is why I'm going through with my decision to vasectomize myself. I have been doing some reading on the causes of BPD, and the key points of these articles are always genetics and poor parenting. I was a victim of both, since my father suffers from BPD, walked in and out multiple times, and had an emotionally and physically abusive mother. My condition is stable, for the most part, I do not partake in suicidal behaviour, reckless behaviour, and don't abuse substances (to the extreme anyways), but in social situations, I am simply inept. I don't have any control of my emotions, and have had multiple altercations in the past because of this, for fucks sake, I'll kick the dog if he barks at the door and scares me. I can only imagine how detrimental my condition would be to my parenting, and given the line of mental illness in my family, the chances of my child developing a mental illness are substantially high, and I do not want that, I refuse to bring a child into this world that has to be in a constant war with themselves, struggling to find a stable sense of identity and in near-constant suffering. Considering how promiscuous I am, a pregnancy in a partner is likely to occur sooner or later, hell, when I was 17 my girlfriend at the time had 2 abortions done for the sake of not fucking up our lives and the child's. I'm going to stop this cycle now, and hope that I am the last one in my bloodline to have to suffer like this.

too real for you? not my problem.

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I bet you 10 bucks our relationship doesnt end until one of us dies

>>17696995
I'm sick of my girlfriend, I just want to hook up with chicks, I hate my life, I hate my boss who keeps me from moving up in my job, I'm completely unhappy with how my life has turned out, my love life has always been a fucking mess, I've grown to be cynical and developed so much hatred for people in general, I never get to see the few friends I have, I've wasted so many opportunities to do great things that now I just want to do nothing but drink, get high and eat shitty food. All my hard work to make my life good has all been in vain.

>>17704534
big show of confidence there.

>>17704546
well I don't want to bet too much, otherwise she may choose the money over me
Also if I'm right she'll never have to pay up so why would I bet more
fucking stupid idiot

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I am having a tough time with my job, and my life in general. These "problems" aren't going to sound tough to most people, but I'm a lowly prick like that.

I'm having trouble disengaging. I'm not doing a very good job at work, and I know it. I'm just lousy at doing things. It's a small business, with a VERY do-it-yourself atmosphere. I am very dependent, in all areas of my life. I'm super timid and cowardly.

So, I spend extra hours at work trying to catch up. I take care of more things than I need to because I feel bad about what I did so far. 10-12 hour days, 6 days minimum a week are the norm. I don't ask for more pay; I'd feel even worse if I received more. And I am not being forced or even asked to do these things. I don't even let my coworkers know that I'm working overtime half the time.

But I've been doing it for a while now. About a year and a half like this. At this point, I feel guilty when I stop working around 8pm. It's hard to concentrate on weekends. I can't get a grip and relax. Shit's ruining my life.

I don't really need advice. I know what the solution is: to just stop, obviously, and maybe find another job. But I wanted to get it off my chest.

I'm tired.

I have a sex drive to the point where I am considering chemical castration. I masturbate 10 to 15 times a day and can't fall asleep unless I jerk off twice. When I was younger, there were days when I would orgasm 20 times. It was so intense when I was younger that I am honestly lucky that I didn't rape a girl. That's how much it ruled my life... I was and am a slave to it.

I have picked my line of work specifically so I can jerk off, as well as my major. It's..a..fucking..nightmare. Does anyone else have any idea of what I can do? Doctors have recommended I see a therapist but I know it won't do shit.

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Oh boy, coming home from wagecuckery and finding your home exactly the way you left it and no one to talk about your day and share a moment of closeness. Particularly awful when you work near beautiful women all day.

I wish the fucking niggers would stop nigging so I can go back to thinking of them as humans

>>17704755
American ones I mean

>>17703609
Thank you. Me too.

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God damn it Abigail I miss you too much! I wish i could just hold you in my arms right now and never let go of you. Why was god so cruel as to separate us? You were my everything;we were wonderful. Why did the greatest thing that ever happened to either of us have to end?

So my therapist and my doctor both want me to drop out of college and quit my job because it's causing me too much stress. I admit my struggling and I regret starting school again. I was somewhat ok working full time, like my therapist had pushed my after being a neet for 3 years and stuck in therapy. I don't know how to feel. It's like they want me to to regress into my old self again. And if I ever go back to being a neet I'd probably off myself. I hated that time of my life and regret all the time wasted

A lot of my friends have informed me that they can't stand my mate, and only hang out with him because they wanna hang out with me. On the one hand, I feel bad because my friends shouldn't have to deal with him if they don't like his abrasive temperament. On the other hand, I'm kinda pissed off at them, because they could just tell HIM they're uncomfortable around him, and not put me in the middle at all.
Fuck.
Should I tell my mate what they've told me?
Should I tell them to straighten their own shit out?
Or do I stay quiet about it so as to avoid drama even though it's bugging ME?

I'm done. I already tried to be nice and fun but apparently no one has ever take me seriously. I don't fucking care about this """second family""" anymore. Go on and make fun of me you bitch.

woke up tired
went to school tired
left school tired
got home tired
stayed up tired
fell asleep tired
repeat

>>17698640
Story?

>>17704397
Derp

>>17704946
maybe tell him and make plans to hang out with him separately. and if you guys hang out online play games together then maybe make 2 voice chats so that only you can hear him but you can hear your other friends as well.

I treated my ex gf absolutely horribly. And she still loves me. She is a saint. She recently decided to break up with me for a time to get her feelings in order. I fucking hate myself for what I did. I hate that I am so weak. I hate that I am not as strong as her. I hate that I am not as good a person as her. I fucking hate myself. I fucking hate everything. I'm so lonely. FUCK.

I keep telling everyone I'm losing weight for my own self-improvement but I'm really doing it just so I can leave behind a nice corpse when I kill myself.

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>>17705176
What did ya do?

>>17696995
I Wana die but I haven't decided how

>>17705274
Broke up with her but kept her hopes alive by staying friends. Had sex with her and told her I loved her even though the feelings weren't 100% there. Eventually got back together until three weeks ago but holy shit I just feel so fucking awful about taking advantage of her like that.

>>17697193
Get fat and die.

>>17705282
Probably a dumb problem but I value honesty and sincerity quite a bit.

>>17697432
Then do the first thing anon said.

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Does anyone ever feel like their mom is really clingy?

My mom makes me text her every night that I"m safe in my apartment at college. And she just called me right now because she wanted to hear my voice. I'm just really disgusted by the clingyness but I love my mom too. It's just I feel really smothered right now to the point I want to avoid her calls.

I'm really uncomfortable by the clingyness. She once cried to me about her problems and that was so fucking uncomfortable, but I wanted her to not feel so sad.

>>17697570
Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha
They just hostile nigguh

>>17697686
The system encourages people to be animalistic. Watch Zeitgeist on Netflix

Okay so she says "i never bother her, don't ever think that I do" well thats great! I used to think I annoyed her, but now not at all. Still though I think I should be a little careful when im around her

Lets see what happens this week "boo"

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>>17705302
She's probably just lonely.

My dad's put me in a slightly similar situation. He's had depression for years thanks to my mum constantly cheating on him since I was about 5 years old. He has absolutely no friends so every day without fail, he'll vent all his feelings to me. My mum used to make me sleep on the cold floor during the winter so her boytoys could sleep in my bed while my dad, being too much of a pussy to do anything about it, slept on the couch. He's told me repeatedly he no longer loves her and hasn't divorced her "because of the kids" which is just a bullshit excuse because I know his lazy NEET ass is too scared to find love again.

Every fucking day he'll mention how he's constantly tried to kill himself, how he intentionally forgot his meds to hurt himself, how much she hurts him. I've told him I don't feel comfortable talking about this on multiple occasions but he doesn't take me seriously at all. I'm worried that if we completey stop talking about it, he will genuinely kill himself. I love the guy but he's a selfish coward. Any time I feel even a tiny bit of happiness, it gets taken away from me the minute he opens his mouth. My younger brothers are the only fucking thing in this world keeping me going. It's just eating me up inside, man.

I'm having a great/terrible night.

I was out with friends including one that I hadn't seen for ages.
We were always good friends but tonight really reminded be how great we got a long
She and I just have an understanding. Like, we both like the same things and we don't need to disguise our interests in anything. It's just like "Yeah that's cool". You know what I mean? About like everything too.

When I was leaving, we got to talking about communication and how neither us really think that anyone can truly understand each other and that how life is a fundamentally lonely affair.

But like, by talking about how everyone is ultimately alone, I really felt a connection.
Maybe the most important type of connection.

I'm still drunk, but I'm feeling emotions and shit about her. Like she's the type of person you meet only a few times in a lifetime.
I don't think I'll see her again for years.
And that's making me feel really fucking sad.

These emotions are making me confront parts of myself that were safely locked away.

>>17697782
I believe in death

>>17705337

Shit dude, you've got it worse than me. I'm sorry your mom is doing that to your dad and I"m sorry about your dad. I bet you feel some guilt that you don't want to listen to your dad anymore, the same guilt I feel about not wanting to listen to my mom being lonely.

I just wish I had the strength to care about what she says, but I"m just annoyed having to text her every night to tell her i'm okay. I need to communicate better but I feel so grossed out by all this and what she's doing, even though she's a really nice lady and she's done nothing wrong except be by herself.

>>17705302
Just be nice to her anon. One day she will die, and you will miss that clingyness to some degree.

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I played a large part in ruining my last relationship. Also I acted like a real bitch. Boy did I fuck up.

Bazinga!!

>>17705353

That's what is tearing me up inside. I can't help but dislike the clingyness but at the same time I know she won't be around forever. I am so conflicted, these emotions of mine are contradictary.

>>17705371
Yep. That's life.

Try to help her when you can and stealthily avoid when he can also

There's a saying that really helped me put things in perspective.

You're not required to light yourself on fire to keep others warm

I had a hiking date this morning with a former coworker, and another date on Friday with this girl I've known for a bit from tinder.

However, I have feelings for a current coworker, but she's focused on her studies, among other things, to care about a relationship right now.

I know I'm entitled to go out with other girls in this case, but I feel I can't commit yet, and feel bad that I might be leading these girls on if I have more dates in the near future.

>>17705375
Dates aren't commitment.
Go for it

>>17705343
Part of being a man is being able to let things go. Trust me when I say that if you relate feelings of love/joy/happiness with people and material things you will always remain unfulfilled. Instead focus on being happy on your own and keep it that. Think of being with her as a supplement to your already happy life

>>17705480
Oh yeah, I've let people go before.
I've let go of everything.
So many things.

It's just with her, for the first time in ages, I felt a connection and I know I'm going to leave it behind. It's just hurts me that it does and I want to externalize this pain.

I talked to her about being existentially alone and the difficulties (or even impossibility) of communication.

I felt less alone with her. On a fundamental level you know?
Like someone who lived in the dark and saw a candle in the distance.

I'm emotional now because I'm still drunk. I don't allow this type of lapse of control otherwise.
But I felt less alone.
And I don't know when that's ever going to happen again. So I'm mourning that feeling now while I can

I have to pee really badly, but I'm almost 100% sure the person in the other room is jerking it and I would have to walk past them to get to the bathroom. I don't have anything I can pee into to avoid them.

I want to admit myself into the local psychiatric hospital but I'm afraid they won't admit me or people like my dad will be mad at me.

>>17705497
That's deep thought there, brother. Being drunk is certainly playing a role in the way you're acting now. When you're sober I'm sure you'll overcome this candle in the dark feeling and realize soon enough that you aren't alone. It's like a black hole sinking your soul into an abyss devoid of positivity and that feeling sinks in further and further the more you dwell on it. I like to think the further you go down this abyss, made just for you, the stronger you become once you dismiss it. You'll be fine young man. Drink some water before bed and think about the universe while you fall asleep

we have a dead sex life anymore. I feel like we have become just good friends who kiss that's it. In my lowest points I think maybe we would both be happier with someone else instead of this delusion of a normal relationship. I feel I'm more scared of losing you as a friend than as a lover that's why i stay...............

>>17705510
I've had that feeling before when I was in high school. Looking back now if I did put myself in one, my life would have been one huge introspective ride. I'm happy I didn't cause I found out I can still have that introspective ride and learn about more things to ponder at night. Control it and your life will be as wonderful as you want it to be

>>17705525
>realize soon enough that you aren't alone
Nah, you got it the wrong way.
I'll feel better when sober not because I'll see the causes of my current ailment to be not as strong, but I'll be strong enough that my ailment (i.e. extreme loneliness) doesn't pressure my mind too much.

But being able to feel these thoughts are why I drink in the first place.
I'll finish my drink, have some more water (always drink equal amounts of water to volume of alcoholic drink) then sleep until I'm more concerned about my hangover than whatever the fuck I'm feeling now

>>17705540
Well, I'm not thinking long term, just a few weeks maybe in order to get to a point were suicide seems like the inevitable end of the path I'm on. I really just don't know what the right thing to do is.

I don't know if I'm pooping correctly and I don't know who can teach me.

>>17705554
Eat mo fibre and put your feet up

>>17705371
Definitely do what other anon suggests. Love your mom keep a healthy distance.

>>17705374
Nice I needed that one

>>17705389
This

>>17705235
>lose weight
>get skin folds so that you look like a walking mud man
>double the bacteria to feast on your corpse
>double the stink

sounds like a good plan to me, fuck everyone

>>17705557
Thanks!

Best way for a 25 yo male with job and car to hook up with nice lady renting a room at his grandfather's, go?

>>17705577
I forgot: Try to poop at the same time every day.
That really does help.
Even if you don't feel like it at the moment, try and you'll be surprised.

It's not called "regularity" for no reason

Good poops are one of those small things that can make everything better

>>17705549
If you do it even for a few weeks it will come out on your medical record and it WILL come back to haunt you. Just deal with your problem head on. It will become easier the more fortified you are spiritually

>>17705543
Yeah. You drink to feel this way then overcome it. Either to forget it/become stronger/let it move on. Or all of the above. Am I projecting or am I right?

I bore those around me.

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eugenia cooney has aspergers and is anorexic. Never seen someone in such denial.

When I go back to my hometown in a year for that event I need to attend, I'm gonna fuck my ex coworker whether he's married or not. He sent me a dick pic and I'm on a hop on that. I'll be a slut

>>17705808
You're being a bad person not a slut, maybe also an animal that cannot control her urges too but you are not exchanging sexual favors to better your material or social state

I refuse to let you treat me like this, and no matter how much I love you, this will change. If you can't do that for me, then I will.

Well... That is kinda annoying.

It's nearing the 4 year anniversary of Sandy, and as such, it's sub section of my local news site is linked from the front page. So I click on it, and one of the first pictures I see is a family photo with the Girl I'm interested.

For some reason I just can't escape her. If it's not randomly seeing her there, it would be friends or family mentioning her. And if its not that, then it would be seeing her FB pop up on my recommended friends

>>17705808
don't you have a bf?

>>17705539
You're obviously young. This is obviously the first long term relationship you've ever had.

Guess what, the guy you start fucking next it will eventually be the exact same way. You can keep doing this for the next 15 years of your life until you're too old and fat for anyone to want. Then you'll desperately cling on to whatever man is free and not married. Your sex life will still be completely dead and you'll be with someone you don't even love because you value sex over everything else.

You sound like all my ex girlfriends. They all bitched because they wanted sex to a retarded degree. We had sex 3-4 times a week after being together for over 4 years and that still wasn't enough for them so they ended up cheating on me.

Every single one of them want me back and are obsessed with me. Their social media is nothing but "Remember that time we sat in the cold watching fireworks? I miss you..."

>>17704486
initials?

>Don't have a job anymore
>Have to go and have brain surgery in January
>Just lost $5000 because gambling is my only escape from my reality
>The only reason I don't an hero is because it'd hurt to many people in my life

I'm seriously over life, I'm laying here upside down in bed wondering is it ever going to get better... I spend majority of the day in my room playing vidya and drinking redbull because it's the only thing that keeps me awake with the shit medications I'm on because of my epilepsy... I don't cry because I don't want to bring people down with me but seriously, is this the way life is suppose to be lived?

>>17705923
don't project your asshurt, loser
a woman is fully capable of getting a man in her late 20's if she keeps herself in good form
NOBODY SANE, that is fucking nobody, settles down early. Just because YOU HAVE TO CLING early doesn't mean everyone else has to. Get a fucking life.

>>17706487
You sound like a catch.

Thank you for proving my point.

>>17706487
Don't generalise like that.

Some people settle early some settle later and some don't settle at all and all of it is fine.

It's nobody else's business what you are doing in terms of relationships and sex life unless you're pedo, rapist or similar.

>>17706490
What, for appreciating a woman's... a human being's freedom?
If you settle down early it's going to go down the drain with regrets. I did it. And it was nothing but 8 years of us sticking together. I lost half of my youth with that person. You're supposed to go out and get to know people, know who you're compatible with, and make an educated decision on whom to spend your life with. You don't fucking settle down with your highschool sweetheart that's fucking naive and stupid.
I'm sorry you got dumped but you can't come in here and throw around your loser rhetoric which I wish could say was some exercise in moral purity, but has probably more to do with your fucking insecurity. The same with all of these hyper-conservative alt right red pill assholes. They want to chain women to themselves because they don't have what it takes to enjoy their own bachelorhood.

>>17706487
Oh he got you to a tee didn't he? Lol ur ass hurt

>>17706497
Then he shouldn't be in here, GENERALIZING about the previous poster. Telling her she's going to ride some cock carousel until she's old and dumpy. Give me a fucking break.

>>17706508
Minorly irritated, a far cry from the widespread asshurt from loser white boys who spend their lives playing fucking video games and then cry when women don't wanna stick around. Then come in here like a pack of fat bitches to gang up on me. Thanks, loser.

>>17706510
He's an alt right troll.
He's not to be taken seriously or replied to, you are not an alt right troll so I replied to you.

Maybe you should calm down if you're getting this mad off of Internet words.

>>17706517
No, these faggots need to be stopped. I am tired of smelling and hearing and reading these retards who've bathed in nothing but their own self-piteous tears.
You better believe it's not a troll. This is real, they're ruining men as much as turbowhores are ruining women. I swear this culture is going down the shitter.

>>17706512
im not even fully white lmao go get laid ur pussy has sand in it

>>17706521
People can't be ruined they aren't sandwiches
If guys buy into it they were too far gone anyway, you seem kinda stupid as well desu so I'm going to stop replying

I woried about: my act score , going to college, my grades ,and asking her out

I got a girl pregnant. She's a fucking lunatic and besides I am not in a position to take care of a kid. If I can't find a way out I am likely going to kill myself.