Lack of libido

if you dont already, smoking marijuana can be kind of a sex thing esp w your partner.

>>17663237
I went through a phase where I was getting really big boners from marijuana. But I haven't gotten those for awhile.

http://www.ohjoysextoy.com/scienceofdesire/


Other things that can be affecting you are things like depression or medications. Poor health quality is also a factor.

It's also entirely possible that your sex drive is more "responsive" than "spontaneous", meaning that you don't really get horny just on your own with no outside stimulus, and instead your sex drive is dependent on a sexual situation already happening, which your body then responds to. How often do either of you initiate sex?

Personally I also find that if i don't get sex for a while, I cool down and want it less often. But the more I get it the more I want it.

>>17663254
Depression might have something to do with it. Work has me stressed. Home life hasn't been good. (Not her, just the neighborhood)

My sex drive I'd place at a bit of both categories but I don't know. She often initiates sex, and I'm often unable to perform. We used to have sex quite often, but it's been a steady decline for the past year or so.

>>17663267
Try to handle the stress in your life, particularly the depression. I know my husband's sex drive plummets when he's depressed. Treating that brings it back up again.

I also recommend going to a doctor to rule out any physiological issues.

>>17663280
Yeah, I did see a doctor a few months ago and he did my vitals, said I was okay and that I was most likely depressed.

He gave me some pills, and I stayed on them for 3-4 months. Can't say I noticed any real improvement, but my living conditions haven't changed yet either. I'll be moving by the end of the year, and then I get to take vacation time.. So, hopefully that'll clear me all up.

>>17663300
Did your wife notice a difference? The funny thing about medication for mental health problems is that the brain likes to believe that the current state it's in is the state it has always been in and always will be in.

This means when you're depressed, you feel like you've always been depressed. When you're high, you feel like you've never been depressed. And when you take medication, you feel like it hasn't made a difference because this is how you always have been. That's why you need to talk to other people and have them tell you if they notice a difference.

And if that medication doesn't work, try another. There's so many out there, and there's going to be ones that work. You just have to find them.

>>17663352
There was a difference that I noticed for awhile while taking the medication, but life in general was good for that time anyway. We had just taken a summer vacation to Texas, and life was great (she was on her period unfortunately as far as the sex went.) But, since then, even still taking the medication for a month or two after, I was just the same depressed me I'd been.

I don't know if I want to stay on medication when I'm actually depressed, because I know it'll get better, and I'm actively doing stuff in my life to get to that point. I don't want/need medication to corrupt the way I truly feel.

>>17663366
I understand that feeling, I felt the same way. Until something in my body screwed up and I wasn't able to sleep anymore. I need medication to even have a hope of falling asleep.

If it weren't for that medication, things would be really bad. When I was insomniac it really fucked with my head. Lack of sleep really fucks with your brain, and I started feeling it hard. I'd lash out, get violent against myself and very nearly against other people. I was moody, I was emotional, it was awful. That medication saved me.

Yeah, my insomniac state might be more "natural", but I don't know if I'd consider it true. I slept just fine before, and then suddenly I couldn't. That wasn't how my body was supposed to work, but that was what it did.

It feels different because it's your brain, but the brain is a part of the body that has its flaws and quirks and weirdnesses like anything else. There's really no difference between taking medication to make your serotonin levels correct than there is to taking medication to make your hormone or insulin levels correct. It just feels different because we're afraid of our selves changing.

But our selves are at the mercy of all of the other bolidly processes already. Things like sleep and hormones and adrenaline and pain. That sleep deprivation changed my self, but for the negative. If my self is subject to things like that, I'd rather medicate it and live a better life, you know? One where I function the way I'm supposed to and don't pose a danger to myself and others because of a stupid body quirk.

But I do understand if you don't want to. I just ask you to think about it and keep your options open. There may come a time that you want or need it again.