Hi /adv/ Super boring thread, slightly different from the norm

Hey, whenever I can support a thread that isn't "how 2 git layd" and "is gurl interdasted?" I will.

For me one of the hardest things when I moved out was setting a compass direction. Basically you're whole life's been plotted out step by step and holyshitballseverythingsfuckingscary.

You're in a new environment, with infinite opportunities and you have no idea which paths lead to happiness and which lead to unhappiness. I know I felt paralyzed, like I was about to venture into a minefield. My brain said, sticking with the analogy, "I know the ground I'm standing on doesn't have any mines on it, why should I risk going on the land that might have mines?

The most helpful thing I did was just moving, which way doesn't matter that much right now, just by the act of pursuing something gets you half way there. And yeah, you'll do some stuff you won't want to do again, but most of the time you can turn back and try a different way. But if you stagnate, you're still never making it out of the minefield.

Hoped this helped anon.

Since the topic of moving out is up there, my question would be how to do so without friends.

Now, when I say this, I don't mean I have no friends whatsoever. Because of recent complications throughout life, I've had to move back and forth between two states and two parents. Originally had moved in with my mother because my dad is too strict and doesn't know how to live a life outside of his imaginary rules. Now, she's dead, all of my friends are in that state, and I'm not back to living with my father and it's causing my life to stagnate. He's so negative about anything I actually do (not the idea, he promotes that. As soon as I start doing anything, he immediately jumps to shitting on it in every way possible until I quit because he honestly just wants me to be a copy of him) that I've come to a point where I don't do anything but cook or clean, and even that pisses him off.

It's starting to seem as though until he dies and my life is fucked, I'm not going to have any freedom or actual life, and if that does happen, the only freedom I'll have is to be homeless.

Halp plz? Also have a snide older sister that minions for my father in also trying to make sure I have no social life whatsoever. Literally started dating my best friend, who was known for being a lying cheater, just to ruin our friendship and social circle. How do I know it was definitely this? She has over 2000 Facebook friends, tries to talk to all of them; networking is her life. She, by definition, would have no need or purpose of putting input on my life yet still insists on doing so every waking day, even if it produces no positive results for me and every single one for her. Literal demon.

Please help.

>>17646403
>I *am* back to living with my father
Little mistake.

You should write something among the lines of "Social Life 101: How to get started for people after 25" for all those neckbearded virgins (me including) who basically can't hold a meaningful conversation for shit. Unless someone wrote this already.

If possible check the water pressure of the place when you're being showed it. Water pressure can make or break a place.

>>17646403

I am the OP and have recently moved cities myself, so can completely relate to the issue of making new friends.

I have made a lot of friends through work and have also tried to keep contact with friends from my previous city. It can help to attend local community groups, maybe develop a hobby where you'll be around like minded people. Your family don't need to know about this, you are in control of your own social circle and how you socialise with others.

Your father sounds like negative influence on your life and if I could advise you of anything, it would be to use this negativity to work on getting a job and moving out.

>>17646384
Huh.
I felt really overwhelmed when I moved out the first time. I was 18 and there was so much to do, and I barely knew how to do anything. I guess you should cover topics like
>Tips about finding a place
>Legal aspects (contracts, utilities, bills)
>Tips to live on your own (chores, food, budgeting)

I fucked up really bad because I didn't consider public transport and I ended up walking 45 minutes under snow and rain to get to university. Bad idea.
I was also really lazy about cooking and doing chores, ended up spending much more money than I should.

If you need me to be a bit more specific, I can write you something more.

>>17646719

Ha! Very good idea and probably something I could benefit from myself at times. I would love to do this from a professional point of view but it's more the practical side of renting that I'm focused on at the moment.

I am going to devote a section to socialising in the area I work in though, maybe some community groups, etc.

>>17646737
Outside of work, there are no social groups in my area. The neighborhood is called Throggsneck, you can look it up. The average age here is over 40, the only outlets are bars along the Ave (only one main street with stores for 5 miles) and I'm just outside of the projects that surround the city, so it's technically suburbs. You know what people don't do in suburbs anymore? Interact.

Not to be a negative Nancy but kids don't even play out in the street since 9/11. Everyone's so scared about who someone possibly could be that there almost isn't a point to living past 15 years old if no one is going to trust you anymore.