ITT: Overthinking

>>17631117
>I've had sex before, my numbers aint high but I know I could do it. I am attracted to her. I might not be the most confident in my abilities(foreplay) but I get worried and actually convince myself that not trying is the better option than just trying at all. Just that my mind always thinks I'm gonna fuck up or I start worrying about one mistake and never recover from it.

tell her this and fuck her afterwards

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>>17631130
The funny thing is I did. She liked that I was honest with her and open about what I felt. She said she still likes me and wants to do this.

I'm lucky she still does but is there anyway I can prevent this type of behavior on my half? I don't want to keep doing this to chicks. My mind always gets the best of me and I just think too much.

I can elaborate more in what I overthink about if anyone is actually interested, but the jist is me thinking I'm gonna not know what I'm doing or that I'll do something stupid cause I lack some knowledge involving sexual experience.

Bumping because I want to learn how to stop overthinking too

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Posting in a sub-par overthinking thread that is actually a sex advice thread in disguise.

I myself actually overthink the living fuck out of everything and end up not doing shit with my life. Just turned 19 last september and i am still awake instead of asleep for my first day of security training for the sole reason that i can not stop stressing and thinking about what will go wrong or what it will be like in the end or if it is even worth it. I could go on saying what i think about what is going to happen but in general i know i will probably come up with some bullshit excuse to not go and take getting fired before i even start due to the pressure of not wanting to do something anymore for the sole purpose of anxiety and overthinking and knowing that i would be half-asleep by the time i even get there at this point.

I don't think you know what real overthinking is until you've met me, OP.

I am just fucked.

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I feel as though overthinking evolves into suicidal thoughts a lot of the time, i have to put it out there that this is a real problem some people have and i hope someone comes in with a half-way decent idea to change a person's perspective completely. It would have been easier to change your heart as a child but becoming an adult and still having this problem feels extremely overwhelming. Please someone i actually beg you to give me something i haven't tried.

I started over thinking everything when I was 14. I hated it at first but I ended up having a lot of common sense. After I got used to it, it wasn't a problem. I actually rely on it to guide me through daily life. But it's not over thinking. It's having a second opinion.

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I just want to enlist. I dont want to do college or life really. I want to go overseas and kill people who hate my way of life. Im no good academically and I cant imagine what the fuck I will do to get into a decent college at this point.

Well to the anons whos entire life is undetermined, sorry but I cant give you any worthy advice. To the people who have most of their stuff together, but just let small things get to them, I do have a possible solution. Stop drinking coffee or any other psychoactive drugs that you take but might overlook.

You see the thing is, its very hard to see where some emotions come from and it can be very frustrating to deal with shit that you cant even identify within yourself. I was overthinking some stupid shit about a girl, and one day I got very very upset. I thought about blocking her and never see her again. I was also pretty upset at the fact that how much effect all that small, stupid bs has on me.

I used to drink like 5 cups of coffee every day, because I love it so much. I never really thought about the effects of caffeine. I just thought that since I was drinking too much my body is used to it by now and it doesnt really have an effect on me. The thought popped into my head that anxiety is a side effect of caffeine, and I decided to do a little experiment. I didnt drink any coffee for a couple of days and I shit you not any overthinking or anxiety or whatever was gone. I saw things as they are, nothing more, nothing less.

Now, I understand this is a specific situation involving an external parameter, but I hope this helps someone in some way. I believe our brain activity is what makes us "us" so anything that goes on in there affect you and who you are. Dont take this for granted. Somethings, especially of chemical nature, may have a bigger effect on you than you might realize. Try to identify what emotion is coming from where. I know its hard but even trying to look at this from another perspective might help you.

>>17631642
See i have all my stuff together, pretty well off for a 23 y/o.

I over analyze and over think everything. I don't drink coffee, i don't drink alcohol, smoke, do drugs. I do drink soda but that is kept to a minimum now days.

>>17631117

Calm down and accept that sex isn't just automatically and instantly great. Your girl will have to deal with a few more sucky intercourse sessions before you start finding your stride.

>>17631532

Go for it. Going to college without any plan on how to use it is a waste of time and money. And after a four year enlistment, you can use education benefits to waste the government's money on it instead.

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>>17631469
The sex thing was my most recent event with overthinking. Guess this is a sex advice thread now if anyone wants to share info on that too

but like what >>17632326 said, I guess sex can't be instantly amazing(to be honest I think there's ways of being suave like that, i just dont have it fully figured out yet) I know I'm not the best, but the fact I know its not going to be great because of MY faults gets to me mentally rather than accepting the fact that I'm not as experienced as I want to be and biting the bullet by diving into foreplay with the risk of not being good at it.

How do I accept that? Do I embrace it and act confident with these faults? Do I just never tell her and let her notice "wow this muh fucka has no idea how to eat out or finger a chick"

I know it's a mind over matter type of thing, but I can't see things clearly and keep making second opinions like >>17631505 & >>17631642 said

The sex thing is just a example I can think of that is greatly effected by my overthinking. I feel if I figured out the problem for overthinking while being intimate, it would be a good basis for going about how to approach the other issues effected by overthinking. Other aspects of my life are effected by a little less or just as much (socializing, school, etc)

Is there a way to turn this into something useful? Is having this second opinion a good alternative perspective?


Stats of myself if it helps put it in a better perspective
- 22yo male
-4 chicks slept with (yea i know)
-used to be skinny but people said I always had a nice voice and was really handsome so I kind of grew into myself now after some maturing and lifting
-Can make people laugh and socialize but when people think of me in regards to sex they think I'm some sort of pussy master by the way I carry myself and look but in reality I feel that they are probably more knowledgeable then me at this point in our age.