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Should i tell my girlfriend I am/was a virgin.
The situation is this, I had a religious girlfriend for many years, over 5, she wouldn't fuck before marriage, she would do everything else, foreplay etc, but not intercourse. I accepted this because we agreed and i thought for certain we would get married, i loved her, and we were planned to be married, but one month before, she left me. Left me as a virgin in my mid 20s.
But now I have a new girlfriend for about a month, and she's wonderful, lovely, kind and caring, extremely understanding and compassionate. She is extremely into me as well. We had sex last week, i was pretty terrible, i couldn't get hard most of the time from the nerves, we've tried again and i couldn't get fully hard and it went down quickly, thing is, i told her I'm not a virgin of course, i just explained it as nerves with a new girl, she is really helpful and kind about it and wants to help me through my erection problem, but i secretly know its caused by my nerves of being inexperienced whereas she thinks it might be her or i need some special turn on.
But i don't know if i can keep up this lie anymore, or if its a good idea to try keep it up to her for the rest of our relationship however long it may be. Should i just tell her that she's the first girl i've fucked and horribly inexperienced at intercourse. It would also explain why contrarily I'm so good at foreplay. If i tell her she might be understanding but I'd feel very pathetic, or she might be mad at me for lying and also think it's pathetic although i think she would understand and help.
What do?
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Don't say anything, continue fumbling during sex until you get better.
If she asks why you are so good at eating, just say you watched a lot of porn and practiced it on a mango.
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>>17604759
My boyfriend went through the same thing.
He lost his virginity to me at 25, after spending 7 years with a super christian girl.
I didn't care. Like, he doesn't lose his value in my eyes for not having had intercourse before.
Can't guarantee for your girlfriend, but if she's as good as you say, she won't care.
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>>17604775
You lied about something important, and she might be pissed off about that. But you might as well come clean. The act of continuing to hide this is clearly eating you up, and it will continue to do that until you stop hiding.
But I think you'll be all right. Truth be told, she has probably figured it out already. Apologize for lying and tell the full story. You'll be stronger for it in the end.
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>>17604766
Fumbling around isn't working, I'm not used to condoms either and they suck.
>>17604775
I guess if she is really bothered then she isn't the girl i thought she was. Did he tell you straight away or was it after you fucked?
Religious girls really take advantage of honest loyal men.
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>>17604789
Well get used to it dipshit. You want to go raw and get this broad pregnant?
>But anon she is a really great girl and I don't mind
Fuck off with this mentality. I am sick of you idiots complaining about condoms when you probably tried a couple. Try 10, 20 if you have to until you find one that works best to your liking. Pulling out is the worst option possible.
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>>17604792
What? I didn't say i wont use them, i just dont like them, feels like my dick is strangled trying to get the thing on makes my dick start going down. If things progress other forms of contraception would be nice to try, she already said she'll try female condoms.
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>>17604789
He told me after 3 months we were together, we hadn't fucked yet.
I kind of assumed he wasn't virgin. He never lied, but just went along with my assumptions. One day we were about to have sex, he got really nervous and, when I asked, he told me the truth. I just hugged him and joked about it.
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>>17604795
>female condoms
This guy.
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>>17604795
I'd suggest IUD if you're monogamous.
No way of fucking it up, lasts for 3-5-10 years and is fucking comfy.
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>>17604759
>i told her I'm not a virgin of course
now you got to stick to your story. no point in coming clean unless you want to cause unnecessary damage.
telling her would be a gamble, really. your call.
Also, don't beat yourself up and relax.
If your gf is so supportive as you said, just go with the flow. enjoy your time together and focus on the experience.
no point in being nervous, it's not a test or a performance.
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>>17604832
no, fuck it, tell her. but not bluntly, gotta be the right time.
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tell her that you are out of practice because you dated a religious girl for 5 years who wouldn't have sex.
There you go
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>>17604864
Unfortunately i already told her that i lost my virginity to my ex.
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>>17604865
Congrats on being an idiot but ok.
Just stick with the nerves thing. The next time you do the deed you'll be fine.
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>>17604759
First you are no longer a virgin and second I would not tell and you are making this way more a big deal than it is. Regardless if you fucked your ex or not you were with her for 5 fucking years and it takes a bit of time getting used to another person so you got cover.
Just curious but why did your last gf break off an engagement one month before? While it's good she did if she wasn't ready it would fuck with anyone.
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>>17604877
>Just curious but why did your last gf break off an engagement one month before? While it's good she did if she wasn't ready it would fuck with anyone.
Thats the sort of thing I'll never fully know, she went from loving me and wanting to spend her life with me and then in 2 months never wanting to see me again and hating me.
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>>17604795
I switched to Nuvaring after dating with my boyfriend for a few weeks.
Condoms are extremely offputting for me too.
>>17604805
What about the side effects?
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>>17604929
I haven't experienced any.
I have the hormonal one - My reproductive system is feeling awesome (no perforation, no ovarian cysts, no menstrual pain, I don't even have periods anymore).
It's really just thought-free sex without condoms for 3 years.
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I think I'm going to tell her, it feels wrong to lie, it feels dishonest and like something i have to continually keep up, it also feels like im trying to live up to an unreal expectation of being an experienced guy when im not, and i think this is the biggest reason im struggling to get hard, if she knows the situation for real i would feel a lot more at ease and like i dont have to live up to some high standards ive set myself to pretend to be. I dont want to pretend anymore.
Incidently, how tight are vaginas meant to be, she hasn't had sex for 2 years so she warned me it would be tight but honestly it doesn't feel very tight around me and im not a small dick guy either, but i have nothing to compare to, maybe some vaginas are like cavernous tunnels.
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>>17604951
Afaik, how tight you feel it also depends on how wet she is. She may be too wet.
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>>17604975
She's like the fucking ocean. This girl is mad for me, not sure why.
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>>17604951
>Incidently, how tight are vaginas meant to be, she hasn't had sex for 2 years so she warned me it would be tight
that's not how it works...
vaginas can accomodate the head of a baby, you think a "puny" dick can do any damage?
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