ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

Gay guys: it seems like the vast majority of you are against the idea of relationships and just want to hook up with as many men as possible. What's up with that?

>>17601053
It's so easy since guys aren't frigid about sex and want to just go with different people.

Ladies,

If your man were to get a chronic, debilitating disease like schizophrenia would you stay with him? Not full blown needs to be institutionalized but bad enough that working a job get's difficult.

How hard is it to find girls who don't like casual dating and prefer to get to know guys as friends first?

>>17601116
If it was something just physical, yes. Being a mental illness, I don't honestly know. Maybe, but I don't know.

>>17601116
Depends on how well he managed his mental illness, but I'm not sure if I'd stay if it was so debilitating that he couldn't get a job (because that's a fundamental part of living life, not because hurr durr gold digger)

>>17601121
About as hard as finding your hand in front of your face in broad daylight.

>>17601129
>About as hard as finding your hand in front of your face in broad daylight.

Really? I might just be ugly or overly picky then. I've tried this 3 or 4 times and been rejected so I'm 21 and never had a girlfriend but it was only in this most recent case where she was actually a strong friend to begin with. So I guess I just have an extremely puny sample size and don't know what I'm talking about, maybe I should try to work on patience.

>>17601155
Just because a girl is willing to be friends, doesn't mean she has any romantic interest in you.

>>17600966
Guys and girls.

Have any of you had experience trying to find a partner in a specific group.

Both of my parents are deeply religious while I'm a more moderate believer and I still want to be on good terms with them since they've told me I can only marry a girl who's of the same religion.

How can I put up with this disadvantage to find a girlfriend with the same moderate religious views as mine that will satisfy my parents?

>>17601158
I've never assumed that, and I've had other friends who are girls who I didn't even consider that with. Nor do I usually make friends with girls with that intention. I might recognize someone as physically attractive early on, but to have any interest in a relationship I'd have to know someone for months.

I was more trying to get at the fact that I'm 21 and probably not hideous so I feel like something should have worked out at some point but it still hasn't.

>>17601171
What does that have to do with your original question? If you had a different question entirely, why wouldn't you have just asked that?

>>17601166
>since they've told me I can only marry a girl who's of the same religion.
so what?

>How can I put up with this disadvantage to find a girlfriend with the same moderate religious views as mine that will satisfy my parents?
If they're die-hard-fundis, you won't.

Don't focus on what THEY want, focus on what you want.

With whoever you're hanging out or have a relationship is none of your parents' business. It's your life, and yours alone.

Girls: Thought on a guy spitting in your mouth during sex?

The thought of doing it turns me on. I've kissed the girl I'm sleeping with with lots of saliva and she doesn't seem to mind. I assume most would think actually spitting is disgusting though.

>>17601218
My gf has flat out said that's the one thing I could do that would make her break up with me instantly.

>>17601218
Fucking disgusting. There may be a minority of girls who are alright with it, but that's definitely the sort of thing you ask about beforehand

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Anyone really idk:

Last night went out to ice cream with girl I went to Highschool with. During the drive her and I joked around and shit and had some fun, whatever. But after I got home she texted me saying she had fun and would like to do dinner sometime.... Is she into me?

>>17601329
You really have to ask?

>>17601337
Take that as a yes

Reasking something from last thread.

First date later today, what to wear? It's a casual lunch date.

I was thinking of a fine chambray shirt with dark jeans and chukkas. Alternatively, I can swap the shirt to a blue or white oxford shirt or a plaid shirt.

>>17601384
Where is the date?
I think the outfit looks well. Guys with shirts are 10x hotter.
Go with something more casual like the chambray shirt if it's a more relaxed place, or with a white shirt if it's something more formal and fancy.

>>17601393
It's a pretty casual asian restaurant that she suggested. Look more like a tiny hole in the wall place.

Thank you for the advice.

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Girls - i had a sex dry spell of 6 years, i was at a nightclub the other night and this cute blonde literally came sat on my lap (which is the strangest thing ever), she was laying down, grabbed my hand and put it on her to touch her all over her, she wanted me badly, we were kissing for ages.

Went home, as I was nervous about my performance I performed oral sex and just got her off, I finally had sex with her buy the end, but came pretty quick and was rusty.

The next day she was really distant, havent spoken in a week and now wont return my texts.

Was it me or likely that she was so horny it was meant to be just a one night stand but i have caught feelings?

>>17601422
from the OP:

>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.

I got rejected by a classmate-friend I asked on a date who was nice about it, and i'm over it , but still really embarassed about it. But I dont know what to do when I see them in class? I'm planning on avoiding them for a bit, but hey.

>>17600966
For women, how does attraction work for you?

I heard that women are only actually attracted to the most handsome men and everyone else is just considered average or below, is that really true?

I honestly think most girls I see are pretty and the idea that no one would ever actually find me genuinely attractive because I'm not incredible looking is scary

>>17601503
Avoid chatting and spending time with them for a bit, just smile and say hello. When they're comfortable, start talking to them again.

How do I ask my friend to set me up with her friend? We just met a few days ago, and I thought she was really cute and we clicked really well, but I didn't ask for her number.

>>17601508
I actually don't really want to talk to them again, they did a lot of things that would make most people think they were interested in me, then said if they werent going for someone else theyd say yes, like I'm not a backip option...I'm over having a crush on them but I am just kind of mad and slightly betrayed at them for doing that to me. I will take your advice and just say hi before leaving.whew just needed to vent it

girls, would you go out on a date with someone you know basically nothing about?

we've just been eyeing each other in class, and did some school work together but that's it.

>>17601507
I speak for myself, not for "women".
To me finding someone good looking and finding someone sexually attractive is a completely different business.
I find good looking maybe 30% of men. I have a set of characteristics I find attractive. Sexual attraction, on the other hand, is something much more inexplicable - it's mostly about the feelings I get from being around you, your charisma, the way you flirt, etc.
For example I don't think my boyfriend is amazingly looking (he's average), but I can't be in the same room with him without wanting to fuck him.

>>17601517
not a girl but isn't the point of dating to get to know each other better? go for it, man

>>17601517
Yes. Something casual, to chat and get to know each other a bit.
Like - something like a coffee. Not something like dinner.

>>17601507
All the guys I've dated (2) and liked (4 in total) I met online, and I liked them before seeing their pictures.
And I've noticed that the more I like someone's personality, the more I like their looks.

>>17601512
"Hey friend, can you give me *cute girls* phone number? I met her the other night, we had fun. I'd like to get to know her better"

>>17601517
Depends, if it's a complete stranger (say, someone who just saw me on the street) no.
If it's someone I know from school, work or some other thing, maybe. (Depends on other things like if I like someone at the moment and if I feel like getting to know more people or not).

>>17601520
so I should avoid telling her I'm really into her for now?

last week she said some weird shit on her twitter about exchanging glances, and made her twitter private a couple hours later. also she had a bf but maybe not anymore since he deleted all his social media.

man being a NEET was so much easier.

>>17601533
Absolutely not.
Do not confess to people. It is ALWAYS cringey.
Ask her out. Stop stalking her.

>>17601166
You're the one marrying someone, they aren't. They should be happy to see you happy, be it with a religious girl or a convinced atheist.

>>17601535
I just googled her name. :^(

>>17601518
>>17601521
Is that really true? I find it hard to believe that you aren't just being nice and trying to me feel better

Posted this on the relationship advice thread but that seems a bit dead right now so here goes nothing.

I was dating this girl for a couple of months and it was going pretty well. She was going to have this surgery and we met a day before that and we said that we won't see each other for some time and it was all nice. I sent flowers to her house and she was really happy to get them. We kept texting regularly and everything seemed fine. But a few days ago she suddenly said that she wants to stop dating because she'll take a long time to recover and she wants to comprehend some stuff.
Can you tell me what happened? Why would she suddenly break up? I don't think that there was some other guy so I just want to know what would compel her to do this

ps. During the time we were together, she was never the first to text me. But she always replied promptly whenever I texted her. Can this mean something?

>>17601559
Different femanon here: what they're saying is 100% correct.
If you don't believe us just look around. Plenty of average looking slubs, even ugly fuckers have girlfriends. Objective physical attractiveness is only a very small part of the equation.

>>17601530
Should I ask her if her friend is single, or save that to ask her friend?

>>17601559
In my case that's how it is. I can't speak for all the universe but yeah, in my case that's correct.

>>17601574
Ask your friend to be safe.

>>17601570
Well thank you all, I've been feeling awful recently, I think I should maybe see a therapist or something because I'm horribly insecure, the other night a girl told me I was pretty and I can't understand anyone being attracted to me, I thought she must have just been lying so got upset and left, but if what you're all saying is true hopefully I can try not worry about it so much

>>17601567
We clearly cannot read into her head and tell you what happened.
Ask her to explain to you further, if you wish.

>>17601533
>so I should avoid telling her I'm really into her for now?
Asking her out pretty much implies that, no point in explicitly saying it.

>>17601584
I >>17601521 used to be very insecure too (and still am to some extent). What helped me with that was realising that I liked someone and I didn't care about his looks at all, and the thought of him being insecure or feeling bad thinking he wasn't attractive to me was CRAZY, so I started thinking that maybe some people can feel that way about me too.

>>17601588
Has anything like this ever happened to you? What causes a person to break up just like that?
I did ask her and she said the same thing

Girls:
How often a girl want just to hook up? What kind of girls like this most than a serious relationship?
Asking because dont want something serious, im not against that just want to have fun and most of my friends even guys are much more into the idea of a relationship than hooking up

Also, not much girls ask here, that means girls are less insecure than guys or more afraid to ask?

>>17601610
There are probably more guys than girls on 4chan.

>>17601610
It isn't really something that we can reply to.
In my experience, friends who had casual sex are those who go to clubs and stuff like that.
But it's not something scientific.

>not much girls ask here, that means girls are less insecure than guys or more afraid to ask?
It means that there are less girls than guys on 4chan. It's not 50/50.

>>17601053

A good majority of gay guys actually do want a long-term bf, but since guys generally have a higher libido and are more open to casual sex, it's pretty prevalent. See >>17601058

Combine that with the dating pool being dramatically smaller (3 potential partners for every 100 straight people), and you get a lot of pent up sexual frustration.

(I mean, think about gloryholes, they're literally just a warm hole to stick your dick in. That's pretty much what guys want when they are just horny)

M here, Girls, (or guys too)
How do you flirt? I genuinely have no idea and it never seems like I do even if I consciously or unconsciously make the effort.

Also on the side, I dont feel this is worth making a thread over, but a week ago I got pretty wasted at a party and dont remember anything but as I was leaving a girl id talked to a bit that night and who Id seen before at a previous party a while back pulled me aside and told me to add her on facebook. I did this a few hours later and it was accepted pretty much instantly but im not quite sure how to start or initiate a conversation with her as I was too smashed to remember if it seemed like she liked me or not. Whats the least cringe way? Im pretty terrible at conversing online, as in dont know how to keep a conversation going through text because I have difficulty interpreting emotion/vibes.

>>17601671
bloke here I read an answer on 4chan once that went a bit like this;

"It's not a secret code language that you have to turn on and off - it's basically just you being you, showing a girl that you're interested in her."

i followed that and all of a sudden flirting seems a lot easier. it's a way of showing interest without making things really awkward or too direct. so you build up tension by flirting. hope that helps

>>17601219
So you brought it up with her at some point?

>>17601224
Not sure how I would even bring this up? I might just go for it.

I got one match with a man on on real-life tinder (I'm not on tinder). We're completely perfect for each other, going in the same direction, within reach. Now what? How do I know if he's looking for a relationship?

>>17601580
Incredibly beta question here, but would it be better to just add my friend's friend on facebook and talk to her directly? I've talked to her for about two hours total, which I don't know if it's enough time or not.

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Ladies:
I'm about to cuddle a girl for the first time today. How weird would it be if I got a boner?

>>17601689
I am aware theres no secret code, it just never feels like im flirting with anyone but I suppose its a good thing if it I cant tell if I am or not

>>17601737
If we're cuddling and you don't get hard, I'd be genuinely disappointed.

>>17601600
I had no idea women worked that way, I really just thought women weren't attracted to most men and settled with people they weren't very keen on, but that makes sense, thank you for helping me, that's comforted me a lot.

My friends wouldn't have let me go home with the first girl I was with, but I was absolutely enamored with her, and she thought she was gross but I just wanted to cuddle and stare at her all day.

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>>17601721

Girls:
To those of you still dating the person who took your virginity, do you have any plans of marrying them?

>hooked up with friend
>she says we def have to make this a consistent thing
>changes her mind 2 weeks later says the idea makes her really anxious(we haven't hooked up more than that one time yet)

Do I have a right to be mad? She knows I've liked her for about a year. How can I convince her to give it a shot? She was insanely into me when we were doing it but she said afterwards she got depressed/anxious and that it's a normal thing for hrs after sex.

>>17601773
Yes.
Not in any near future, because we're both still studying and shit, but I want to grow old with him.

>>17601778
Cool. How do you feel about people saying you need more notches on the bed post to know who you are compatible with?

>>17601785
They really don't know what they're talking about.
I don't think sex is the most important thing in a relationship.
We are great together and very happy. He's my best friend and the coolest guy on earth, and together we are pretty amazing. I wouldn't trade that to "know who I am compatible with sexually".
I also have a quite satisfying sex life - we have sex every day, I come pretty much every time. Most of my friends, even those with the highest partner count, cannot say the same.

Girls; in a drunken hookup situation do you usually just blame yourself, or the guy if it was a bad time?

Girls:
What are some things that are frightening about another person to you on an instinctual level? I ask because in quite a few social situations, i tend to make 1 or 2 women jump or yell something like "jesus" or "oh shit!" Whenever i enter a room. I used to think that maybe i just walk quietly and dont realize it but i notice it happen when im the 4th or 5th person to enter the room so i shouldnt be suprising anyone in that situation. My wardrobe isnt anything out of the ordinary and im not deformed or anything. I've even asked a few that i've gotten to know a little bit what was so scary but they just tell me i just made them jump a little. No straight answers there. So how do i go about fixing a problem that i cannot recognize? Need somewhere to start. Will be hard trying to get a GF if i make every girl within a 20 foot radius of me shit themselves.

>>17601801
You are obviously autistic so start with that.

>>17601813
Just noticing peoples reactions to me is autistic? Good to know i guess.

>>17601796
Would you mind saying how hold were you when you made love with him the first time and how long were you dating before doing it? I kind of envy you.

>>17601839
It was 2 days after my 16th birthday, I had been with him for a little under year.
I am now 23, he's almost 25.

>>17601723
I don't think that there's "enough" time to add someone on facebook. Do what you're more comfortable with.
I'd go through my friend.

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Help me /adv/

I'm having sex for the first time next weekend. I'm 27, she's 24 and very experienced. I thought I'd make up for lack of experience by going to town orally, but she's told me she dislikes receiving oral. How do I fake skills without fucking up

>>17601851
You dont. Try a few hookers to get the basics down. Just dont get caught

>>17601840
Shit I wish I had something like that when I was your age. Im 29 turning 30 and I feel I'm long overdue.

>>17601851
Why don't you simply mention that you're a bit inexperienced and let her take the lead?
Unless it's a very random hookup, you can be open to her. Being virgin is not the end of the world.

>>17601857
>a bit

>>17601848
Where do you live and where can I meet women like you?

>>17601864
Well, better than saying "I don't know what the fuck I am doing, I'd probably try to stick my dick in your urethra if you let me take the lead".

>>17601567
help?

>>17601851
Sex is a really weird thing. It comes naturally to us when it happens. Just try to relax. The easiest position for you would probably be missionary with her legs pushed back and a pillow under her bum. I think this would be a more natural position for guys, easier for thrusting inside as the vagina is lifted and the lips spread open for easiest access. Its also very deep for her and will feel really good for both of you. Does she know youre inexperienced? Make sure you communicate so you can ask her what feels good and what doesnt. But most of all try to relax and have fun with it. Be able to laugh a little if your willy slips out by accident. Enjoy her body with your mouth and hands. Chances are that even if you are bad youll be able to learn something from it and use it for other times you have sex.

>>17601851
>but she's told me she dislikes receiving oral.
then you still got those two tubes of flesh each with five smaller tubes of flesh attached at the end coming out of your sholders as tools.
use those. And lips can be used on other parts of the body, too.

Petting ain't the worst foreplay.

>>17601875
you got an answer already.
we can guess all day, but if you want to KNOW, you have to ask her.

>>17601898
I did ask her. She literally said that she has to comprehend a lot of stuff. WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN??

>>17601904
Who the fuck knows?
The only person who knows why she broke up with you is her. Just let her be and move on, or insist to have a talk.

>>17601869
Except he really doesnt know what the fuck hes doing. Saying "a bit" just tells her he may not be familiar with some of the more advanced shit but has the basics down. Its just too much of a lie to get by with.

If you had a fwb would you expect them to be monogamous or tell you if they slept with someone else while you're still fucking?

Girls, how much of a red flag is that I'm not on any social media?

>>17602005
>Girls, how much of a red flag is that I'm not on any social media?
Not at all. I prefer guys who aren't.

>>17601507
Obviously this is just one person's perspective but here you go: my belief is that women don't care less about attraction and being with an attractive partner, but they do care less about looks.

It is in my experience also true that girls do not find regular guys instantly attractive based on appearance like is common the other way around. Part of this is that men do not have the same "hotspots", at least culturally: for men it is obvious to check out women's breasts and asses. Many women do not have a comparable fixation on a part of the male body (though some love ass) or just on the dick, which is hardly useful if you are only seeing someone clothed. Not to mention your average young guy dresses in baggy clothes that make him more a floating head than someone with a body you can easily imagine.
At the same time, that doesn't mean that women don't get turned on by average men, just not by their looks alone. They start seeing a guy as more attractive if they flirt with her, are kind to her, impress her with their personality/interests/intelligence/success. I'd wager that most women have soft spots for stereotypically masculine behavior like being physically restless, whistling, drumming their fingers on stuff, having their hands draped around their crotch...

And speaking for just myself, if you show me pictures of one hundred men, I might find a handful of them really pleasing to look at just from a visual, aesthetic point of view. In real life however, with smells, mannerisms, a way of moving, eye contact, exchanging smiles - I enjoy the thought of being intimate with by far most (I'd wager 80-90%) of the men I come across, and that is not excluding any race, age or weight class. I simply don't find looks that thrilling, let alone sexually exciting.

>>17601774
You have every right to be mad and disappointed, but you can't take it out on her. You cannot make hard promises about how your feelings will or won't develop. It is like people divorcing - factually they broke their vows, but what point is there in yelling in their face that they didn't keep their word? Their feelings changed, they had some but not final control over that, and it's done and happened.

Do not convince her to give it another shot. Do you really think that a healthy, joyful relationship will suddenly sprout from a beginning like this? Obviously she does not return (the extent of) your feelings. Spare yourself.

>>17601797
Would completely depend on what actually happened. If he couldn't be fucked with foreplay, ignored requests or boundaries, touched me roughly and without consideration etc... that's him being a bad lover. If I'm too fucked up to be present and active that's on me. Then there's the no one's fault category of awkwardness that naturally arises, like having incompatible preferences for how you have sex, not liking each other's style of kissing, not enjoying each other's scent or amount of noise etc.

>>17601974
It is common courtesy to inform a FWB that you are fucking someone else, unless you agreed upon a don't ask don't tell policy. Some people feel fine having a exclusive fling, but feel sleazy about having sex with someone that's dipping in another pussy depending on the night of the week. That's their prerogative.

More importantly, though, is to mention when you are having unprotected sex with someone else. Although even if you do use condoms, the STD risk of course is higher with more different partners. This affects all of your sexual partners and not telling your FWB that you're fucking around leaves them unable to look out for their health in the way they want to.

I mean, it's an everyday kind of sin, but it's scummy not to say anything.

>>17601974
I wouldn't expect it. You should set the boundaries beforehand.

I went on a date with a girl, she seemed interested in me. We had plans to meet up again but they fell through. She knows I like her. I asked her when shes free again. That was at 8pm, no response.
Im thinking, if she doesnt respond by tomorrow Im just going to flat out tell her that I want to take her on a second date.
Good idea or no?

This isnt the first time she didnt respond when I asked when she was free. We had made plans for our first date but she couldnt make it. She said she'd get back to me but didnt make plans until I texted her.

What do?

What do lonely girls fantasize about being in a relationship?

I can tell you what men fantasize about it.

>>17602078
>being brought to their childhood home for the first time, meeting their mother
>whispered declarations of love and a future together late at night
>waking him up with kisses and oral sex
>surprising him with the news that I am pregnant of his child (this one I fantasize about most)
>regular cutesy stuff like taking the train to another place together, falling asleep on his shoulder, holding hands, having little inside jokes that no one else finds funny
>cooking his favorite food and spoiling him, showering together with me washing his whole body, shaving his face while he is teasing me and trying to turn it into foreplay

I've lurked r9k for years so I have an idea, but sure, bring it.

>>17601974
You really should. It puts the person you're fucking at a new STD risk. I'm not just vulnerable if that new guy has an STD currently, but if any of the other women he's fucking have one too.

Even if I was somehow able to disassociate my feelings from sex and could engage in it casually, I'd still take a firm stance on that.

How do I make her laugh

I really wish I had a significant other.

>>17602088
fuck, i wish my gf was this cutesy, she hates this kind of stuff

Girls and guys

Is it ok to be a loner, and go your entire life sexless and loveless. that is acceptable right?

>>17602088
You're adorable.
God, you made me nearly cry.
I'll go and do something nice for my boyfriend.

I have a bad habit of over-romancing stuff in my head which in turn causes me to think about one person all the time, is it because of inexperience?

>>17602029
Are you really telling the truth? It's really difficult for me to believe that you'd enjoy being intimate with 80% of men, I always thought women found most men gross

Girls and Guys.

I just quit playing video games a week ago. It was a major outlet for my add. Now people are calling me annoying because I'm just bombarding them with messages.

How do I fix this? Get a new hobby?

>>17602153
I am. If I wanted to lie anonymously I might as well have said that most men look like Greek gods to me. They don't. Doesn't mean I don't want them. Maybe I am especially non-picky sexually, I don't know about that, but this is how I honestly feel.

Girl invites me out all the time, best friends on snap chat, likes everything I post on facebook, and just texted me asking why
I left early from some event.

But when I try to talk to her in person she just says one word to me and walks away.

>>17602146
Please do!! Bask in and reciprocate that love.

>>17602163
>Get a new hobby?
Get a new hobby.

Bonus points for a "social one" where you meet people.

>>17602047
I've had a fwb for like 3 years, and she and I are pretty close but a few months ago she refused to put a label on us and I got kind of frustrated with her. We have since drifted a bit apart but still fuck every few weeks. Last night I got head from my sister's friend staying in our house and she said we could fuck tonight.
One part of me wants to do it because I've only ever been with my fwb (I'm 25yo) and another part of me doesn't want to do it because I'll feel guilty. My fwb also admitted to me she fucked another guy once

>>17602188
Did your FWB tell you that she wanted to fuck someone else before it happened? If not, was she at least guilty/ashamed when she told you?
If she wasn't, that seems enough evidence to me that she doesn't expect the two of you to keep to each other...

Just make sure to wear a condom regardless of whether she's on hormonal BC.

>>17602163
trust me, get a new hobby. I used to be a betafaggot and kind of a loser and I gamed a lot.
I've picked up watching sports (hockey, baseball and basketball) which is great because it's always something to talk about with new people you meet, I also picked up gardening and fishing. Also great because they make you seem interesting and skilled.
I've noticed my confidence has improved since picking up these hobbies because it's something knowledgeable I can talk about with people, and girls seem to like that too.
Get a new hobby. Watch sports instead of time you'd play video games
>>>/sp/
go to game threads so you get a general idea of what's going on. Sports are great man, people love talking about sports.

>>17602199
Yeah, I use condoms all the time anyway. And no my fwb when she admitted it she kind of smirked about it and I got upset because I felt embarassed. After that we didn't talk for a couple weeks but then things got going again and we'd still fuck every couple weeks.
I've just noticed my confidence has improved a lot. So before I was really into my fwb because I was actually having sex, but now that I've realised I can pull in girls, I don't need to rely on her for frequent sex.

>>17602201
>go to game threads so you get a general idea of what's going on. Sports are great man, people love talking about sports.
this desu
Sports like baseball and basketball which are heavily statistic related (especially baseball) is a good outlet for your ADD, although the game is kind of slow so maybe it would be hard to get into?

>>17602166
Well honestly then, thank you, I've been feeling awful recently and you've given me some comfort

>>17602211
>>17602186
>>17602201

I could get into sports. Especially since I live in New York. Hockey and Baseball are big up here. I'll try listening to it in the background like I used to do with Esports(like League). Thanks.

Also, considering picking up Baseball just to fuck around with my dad since he's a Yankees fan.

>>17600966
Don't care who answers, boy, girl, he/she, plant monster, etc. But where do i meet people? Graduated 3 years ago, and its just work then home for me, where do people go? Like, how is everyone finding someone?

>>17602239
My dad got me into sports and it's fun to talk with him about it too. Also fuck the Yankees go Jays.

>>17602088
Some of mine:
>cuddling on the couch watching a movie
>driving around talking about whatever
>eating dinner with her parents for the first time, father looking at me with harsh judgement
>telling her good luck on a test, job interview, etc.
>asking how her day was over dinner
>going to the grocery store and helping each other pick out what we want
>unawkwardly sitting around together in complete silence
>spooning her
>sex

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>>17602253
Join some type of local club or group like an adult softball league, or volunteer at a garden centre

>>17602265
Thanks, plant monster, I'll think it over, I'll at least go to the bar for today, im sad and need to be outside

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Girls, don't you feel embarassed when someone tries to hit on you on public (e.g. On the bus stop)? I've heard (once even seen) people who managed to do that. Does it depend on the girl? In general, what are the best circumstances of approaching?

I've started trying to be more social this semester. So now I'm actually making the first move to hang out with friends. My question is how do I start hanging out with female friends off campus without them thinking I'd like to date them? I don't feel awkward about getting lunch together, but the idea of the two of us doing something not on-campus still doesn't feel quite natural to me.

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>>17602270
Gardening is a great hobby. I have tons of these plant monster macros from /out/. Growing pumpkins inside is apparently hazardous, so in out homegrowmen threads it's a winter challenge to get a pumpkin plant to flower indoors.
We all have friends though.

>>17602272
I never get embarrassed. I was walking down the street at night and a guy said I was beautiful and I smiled, and said thank you and kept walking and then he asked me if he would see me at a popular night club and I said no, sorry and continued on my way. It's not a big deal. As long as you're somewhat socially calibrated and don't grab her (light arm touching is fine), you'll be fine.

>>17602173
ask her out
"you wanna grab lunch some time"
Shes probably just nervous or trying to act cool

Guys, what's up you enjoying women's underwear? As in to smell/taste/hoard not wear.

>>17602302
This is a particular fetish weirdos have. I like women's underwear on women, and I like pulling it off of them. I don't do anything with it after I toss it on the floor.

This is a question for dudes

If you had someone you viewed like a little sister, would there be any chance that you may also be a bit attracted to them? I have someone who thinks of me like that, and I have a feeling that he may also be somewhat attracted to me

>>17602320
>>17602302
Bullshit. It's not for everyone but I don't think there's anything weird about finding it hot to fondle a pretty and sexually charged piece of clothing that was lodged between her ass and up against her pussy all day. It smells like her juices, and even if it also grosses the guy out a bit that can make the overall experience more intense if the rest is positive. Good sexual things aren't commonly and lovingly referred to as "dirty" for nothing. It can feel great to enjoy something when horny that you would not conceive enjoying while in a sober frame of mind.

For the record, personal experience is my ex lover, who was by no means some niche fetishist but loved to lick my panties on occasion. I found it hot as fuck.

>>17602327
Incredibly turned on

>>17602329
Doesn't really answer my question but alright

>>17602327
in a weird way yes and no. I'd be more protective of her than attracted to her.

>>17602320
>>17602302
What this guy said. I don't care about it at all.

>>17602327
He might not feel he can have you for whatever reason, so maybe he has put you in that kind of role to make his attraction easier to deal with and surpress

>>17602335
Yeah like he's protective over me, but there's sometimes moments where I feel like what he says is more than ya know

>>17602340
How old are you how old is he?

>>17602343
I'm 20, he just turned 25

>>17602346
yeah he definitely wants to fuck you.

>>17602350
https://youtu.be/rQ28FcRePAo
No turning back now

I'm going to ask my friend if she could try to set me up with her cute roommate. Should I wait until I hang out with my friend again to do this, or is it okay to ask her over text message?

>>17602362
just fuck your friend

I'm gonna fuck my fwb for the first time soon, is there any easy way to get her to shower first? Not that I think she's dirty but I wanna be sure before I stick my face in her pussy

>>17602374
>I'm gonna fuck my fwb for the first time soon,
How did you arrange this? This is like, exactly how my fwb started. We decided one day yeah let's be fwb, but we can fuck the first time next week.

Also, ask to shower with her, or text her like I'll be over soon I'm just going to hop in the shower to give her the hint? Or you could ask if she wants to shower with you?

Earlier this week I was so drunk at a party I don't remember anything, a girl found me stumbling home and took me back to hers and I went down on her and we cuddled and kissed. In the morning she had to go to school but made me give her my phone number and rang me quickly so I'd have hers too, and kept saying she would really like to have dinner with me. I liked her a lot so I asked her to dinner, we arranged it but she cancelled an hour before saying she had a headache, so I suppose she wasn't interested anymore?

I'm wondering if it's worth texting her again at all, because I'm really interested in her. I don't know if it means anything, but objectively I'm better looking, she's pretty fat and everyone says I look almost exactly like this certain cute singer. I hope that doesn't sound rude, but maybe it would help my chances? I'm really interested in her and stupidly attracted to her.

>>17602388
>I'm wondering if it's worth texting her again at all, because I'm really interested in her.
You are only interested in sex. Dude, a fat girl took advantage of you when you were drunk.

>>17602367
I was originally going to try to go out with her, but we got dinner together recently and she invited her roommate. Don't think she's interested in dating me at all.

>>17602385
Well we met on okcupid believe it or not and talked for a few weeks, met up and smoked and played Nintendo 64 and eventually we started making out and what not. She said she wouldn't mind casually having sex with me cause I made her feel some type of way and she was pretty horny, we haven't had sex yet but are supposed to tonight. I've always wanted a fwb but never really though too much about the actual etiquette of having one so now I'm freaking out.

>>17602327
There's a chance.

>>17602390
I'm honestly not, I didn't even have sex with her and don't care doing her. I genuinely like her a lot. I was out with two cute girls the other night and they came back to my flat but I just asked them to leave because I still felt sad she cancelled on me.

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Question to both guys and girls: Do you open your eyes when kissing somebody?

>>17602710
I always kiss with eyes open like a sperg.

>>17602710
As the rule I keep my eyes closed, I find it distracting to keep my eyes open and want to focus on the feeling of their lips and smell. But I glimpse every now and then because I love to see their face so close with their own eyes shut like they're sleeping.

>>17602710
open the eyes for what?

>>17602710
sometimes yeah

>>17602397
just dont make out with her dude. Just go in there for the sex. Also don't cum in her mouth and use condoms.

>>17602784
Not sure what your experiences are, but few people want to have sex with someone who won't kiss them. That it's not within a relationship doesn't mean you want to feel like a breathing fleshlight for someone who wants to stick it in but is repulsed by kissing your face.

>>17602790
my fwb and I don't make out much desu. Sometimes we'll lock lips for a few seconds but not making out tier.

>>17602793
Eh, I think there's a difference between not making a habit of it and making it off limits at all.

Having said that no sleeping over and no cuddling that does not lead to sex are very standard boundaries to keep a FWB non-sentimental.

>>17602710
I close them to cut off my vision so if feels better

>>17602078
>I can tell you what men fantasize about it.
Please do

>>17602005
It's not a red flag. I only have an instagram account to follow people, I don't use any social media to share my life.

Is being virgin when you're 24 y.o. guy is that much of a dealbreaker? I've never had a kiss or hold hands with other girls.

>>17602798
I sometimes sleep over but we never really cuddle
She swallows my cum though

>>17602923
Not a dealbreaker but a serious red flag. Depends on the reason, none of them are particularly good but some are better than others. A dude who has the mentality of "waiting till marriage" or "till I meet the right one" is better than the one who's too autistic to even look a girl in the eye. Neither are pluses in my book, but as I said, one's better than the other.
>>17602710
Not really. Sometimes I did peek out of curiosity when kissing my past boyfriends, cuz I was wondering what it looked like lol. But never like full blown eyes wide open the whole kiss or anything.
>>17602388
Headache is a lame excuse, so I'd say she likely just bailed. Unless she's got those crippling migraines or something. You can always send one more text and see if she responds. If nothing, take your hint and move on.
>>17602275
Always make it a group thing, invite other people or have her invite other people, never go one on one until you're well versed with one another and they know you're not interested in them that way. If you think they're taking it the wrong way, best way a dude somewhat subtly dropped hints he wasnt interested in me was by talking about his past romances and his type of woman (which was the exact opposite of me) and even sometimes flirting with other women in front of me. The last bit was kinda overkill if you ask me, but I definitely got the hint. We were just friends.
>>17602272
Pfft, if it happened. I've been "cat called" once before, I take it as a compliment honestly. I'll never understand people who hate being acknowledged as good looking.
>what are the best circumstances of approaching
Safest way is to be sure you're in a social setting. IE a bar, or a coffee shop, or a party of some sort. It's socially acceptable to approach someone and chat them up.
Secondly, do not be blatantly sexual. You cross the creep line pretty quickly if you're too graphic. You can say she's pretty or whatever, but not hot or sexy, you feel?

>>17602142
If you consider that a happy and fulfilling life then yes by all means. But usually if you have to ask that means you don't actually find that to be a good life.
>>17602078
Sleeping together (in the literal sense not the figurative), those sleepy good morning kisses, knowing I always have someone to lean on, watching him succeed and be happy. Even just that "being alone but together" thing where you don't even have to be interacting with one another, but you're in the same room. That shits nice.
>>17602005
Depends. If I met you irl, not that big a deal. If you're using online dating, huge red flag. I will likely not meet with you IRL because I have nothing else to go off of to prove you're not a psycho murderer.
>>17601974
Me personally, I would only do a monogamous fwb just purely for safety (STDs and whatnot). I would tell him he's free to break off our arrangement at any time and bang whoever he wants with no hard feelings, but yeah I would expect him to at least tell me before we fuck again if he fucked someone else who was potentially riddled with AIDS. I have to assess risk too.
>>17601774
Not really. Fucking move on to the next girl, she doesn't owe you sex mate. Sounds to me like you'd be doing yourself a favor, because the types that are this wishy washy and feel guilty after sex usually have huge issues you don't want to get wrapped up in. If you "really liked her" and didn't just want a warm hole to fuck then why don't you ask to be serious with her? And then maybe she'll feel better about sex because she'll know she's having sex with someone who actually likes /HER/ and not her body.

I don't really care but I noticed someone I went to school with deleted me off fb. They are still friends with everyone else but not me. I never post statuses or anything. I wasn't ever really good friends with this person, but they still have kept people they never spoke to. As I said I don't care too much but why did I get randomly deleted?

Hey guys. There's this guy that I have a crush on. He doesn't seem interested in me. We used to work together and I only bump into him when I go out at bars. We only have small useless conversations; nothing meaningful. I wonder if he likes me or rather how do I make him like me for him to start a conversation on fb chat with me. I'm scared. He's older , might not see me that way. Really unsure help...

>>17603172
> I never post statuses or anything.
If I had to guess it was this. I delete "inactive" facebooks because whats the point? If you don't use it I don't need a dead facebook on my friends list.

>>17603187
It is active, I meant by that as in I don't post constant status/sharing stuff that may annoy people

Why the fuck do these tinder bitches agree to go out with me and then disappear off the face of the earth when I ask for their number?

>>17603190
Eh then who knows. If you really didn't care then just forget about it.
>>17603194
Cold feet. Chicks get nervous when it sets in that they're going to meet a person they've never met with the intention of getting fucked and then never spoken to again. Sometimes chicks get desperate, and then chicken out.

Are there any date ideas which have zero possibility of indication of sex? I had a one night stand with this girl and she wanted to see me again, but I'm cautious she sees herself as "easy" because we slept together immediately after meeting, and don't want her to feel like she's set a precedent and that I'm going to be expecting sex after we see each other, because I feel like dinner could mean dinner and then back to my place or something, I just want something completely 100% innocent so she knows I'm interested in her as a person and she doesn't feel uncomfortable about how we met

>>17603236
Walk down to the lake and watch airplanes takeoff from the island airport with your legs dangling off a peer.
At least that's what I did in Toronto with a girl last week.

>>17603236
> I'm interested in her as a person
Frankly, just tell her that. She'll probably appreciate it if she's feeling guilty about jumping into sex too soon.
And if you want to imply no sex, just make no plans to ever go back to anyones place alone. Stay out in public, and don't get too handsy.

>>17603249
It seems like it'd be really weird and off putting to just say all that out of the blue

>>17603253
Don't have plans to go back to either one's place. That way nowhere to have sex.

>>17603255
Do you mean, like say, hi do you want to have dinner and then each of us go back to our own places?

That seems like it's be weird

Girls and guys

Is it ok to be a loner, and go your entire life sexless and loveless. that is acceptable right?

>>17603253
I mean, did she directly tell you she sees herself as easy, or did you just make that observation yourself?
Because in the case of the former, it wouldn't be weird at all. You can just say "Hey, it's been bothering me that you think you're easy for sleeping with me. I just wanted you to know I don't see it that way, and I want to continue getting to know you."
In the case of the latter, then assume you're just imagining that and she either just wants you as a fuck buddy or isn't thinking anything at all about sleeping with you first and establishing a relationship later.
>>17603273
Don't repost your questions in the same thread dude.

>>17603273
Do you want that though?

>>17603261
You just don't go back to your place, you don't have to say shit. Actions speak louder than words anyway. Or if you really gotta say it just make up some shit of "I gotta do something tomorrow that I gotta get some sleep for, but lets get dinner."

>>17603173
Advice pls?

>>17603280

I'm sorry, just nobody replied

>>17603282

Yes, just it's hard because people try to pressure me to do other things. It confuses me because it makes me feel as if im doing something wrong.

Anyone,
In your opinion, is it possible to recover from "No initial/immediate chemistry/attraction"?

>>17603296
People just want the best for you, they think you want what they want, so when they're pressuring you, they're trying to help you. It's hard for anyone to understand why someone would want to be loveless, reading it I genuinely don't believe you're telling the truth. But, if you are, understand they don't understand what you want, they only understand what they want and are trying to make you happier by giving you it.

>>17603308

>genuinely I don't believe you are telling the truth

Why do you think I'm lying?

>>17603312
Someone else, but the reason I think you're lying to yourself is if you truly felt that way you wouldn't give a shit about what other people thought. You'd be content with just being happy as you are, and if you really were happy, others would see that.

Think real deep, I suspect theres underlying reasons you reject affection and partnership that you may have just plain repressed. Perhaps its a deep feeling of inadequacy, or fear of being hurt/rejected, something.
Like I said, otherwise you'd just be fine being happy as you are. If other people don't like it, then you don't need them in your life. If you're truly happy as is, prove it to them then. Make them see it.

>>17603312
Because I want to love and be loved, it's something I want more than anything and something I think of and fantasize about. When it's happened and you hold each other as close as you can possibly physically be and still want to be closer, when you lie there in the morning and you kiss them and feel them kiss back and look them in the eye and have them tell you how they feel about you, it's the best thing ever. That's how my mind works, for your mind to work so different is honestly incomprehensible, do you understand? If it's the truth, it's just a truth that I can't wrap my head around.

>>17603327

it's just that people always come to me with this shit. It gets so old. I just got back from vacation, I've already been asked at least 8-10 times today how the girls were. I hear this shit so much. Not just from friends, but from co-workers too. I'd rather just be left alone about the whole topic. But I can't say that, because if I did, it would come off as really weak, since men's masculinity is all based off all this bullshit. I hate it

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How... how do I approach a QT White girl? They seem... overly hostile to us Indian guys.

>>17603343
Not even white, but that's because you guys are creepy.

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>>17603349

Wow... why the hostility bro? And, if I may ask, what is your ethnicity/race? JW

>>17603356
I'm Indian myself, actually.

>>17603304
yes, if you make a very noticeable change.

I've seen girls go from invisible to the center of attention just by changing their hairstyle.

>>17603173
Trying again, pls advice ...

>>17603336

>That's how my mind works, for your mind to work so different is honestly incomprehensible

It's easy when that's something you've never experienced before.

>>17602710
my eyes are naturally open by default

I also like to have sex with the lights on

my favorite thing to do with a new girl is have her lay on her side and I spread her ass cheeks, and take a good look at her pussy and asshole from behind

I think it's embarrassing or something for them

>>17603363

No, you aren't. Nice try though. Indian women aren't self-hating like that.

>>17603342
Again, stop caring. Who gives a shit about your "masculinity" especially if you're not using it to pull girls. Just tell them to fuck off with that talk.

Like for someone who doesn't care about being a "loner" you sure care about people not wanting to be around you.

>>17603365
Make an effort yourself, you start a facebook conversation. He has no idea you like him you doofus.

>>17603374
Don't believe me if you don't want to. Indian guys are creepy as fuck, and then they get hostile if you're not responsive to them. Like you're beginning to get now.

I like this guy, we went out once and really had a good time, but now he's being flaky and acting a little different than before.

On the one hand, i want to give him the benefit of the doubt and cut him a break. On the other, I've just realized I need a breather from everything and may need to take a break from anything serious or casual or in between.

Should i try to make plans or just say "hey, i dig you, but i really need to take it easy with this stuff for a while " the next time i see him? Leaning toward the latter

>>17603367
What's something who's never experienced before

>>17603356
serious question right now though, is it a cultural thing to not wash your armpits and use deodorant? or does eating curry every day really just have lasting effects on you?

here are the facts: indians have a reputation for smelling terrible, being unclean, and having tiny penises

couple that with big lumpy noses, sunken orbitals with dark rings under the eyes, and some of the silliest accents in existence you can understand why you are undesirable to white women

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>>17603343
>us Indian guys
Either you're ugly or doing something wrong. I have no problem getting with white chicks, but then again, I'm pretty light skinned and look somewhat more middle eastern than Indian.

>>17603378
I feel like if I do and he's not interested he's going to see me a different way and I don't want that to happen...

>>17603343
Its the stereotype to the culture. I'll admit, whenever I see a middle eastern/indian guy my inital thought is "Is he gonna be one of those sexist 'women better know their place and be my subservient wife' types, or is he going to be more on par with my culture?"
I remind myself it's not fair to make that judgement, I'll admit it's kinda racist of me, but it's still my initial thought. Despite me growing up with middle eastern neighbors who have been nothing but great people and showed me all the good things with the culture.
But then again, I wouldn't say I'm immediately hostile to them either. But I don't express interest because frankly I don't have any interest in indian dudes. Just not my type.
Also, same thing I say to everyone looking to date interracially, it's very rare. Hardly anyone dates outside their own race, so you're going to have a harder time finding someone than if you were to settle for someone of your own race
>T. A white girl with a thing for East Asians.

>>17603364
I should have specified I was the one on the "not feeling it" side lol. Didn't know how likely it'd be for me to start feeling it later.

>>17603396
I don't understand what you mean? If he's not interested he'll see you in what way?

>>17603382
You didn't fuck him on the first date, and that's all he was after anyway. So if you tell him you wanna wait, you're just gonna get ghosted. He's probably already found another chick who will put out, so dont worry about it.

>>17603403
Negatively, he might just stop talking to me when we bump into each other or try to dodge me whenever I am there or something.

>>17603073
Most of my female friends are classmates, so we don't have a group to hang out in.

>>17603416
You're using plural forms here,
>Friends
>S
Meaning you have more than one, so invite them all out. To girl A "me and some friends are trying to do X, wanna come?", send the same message to girls B and C as well.
You have no friends at all? Not a single guy friend or anything? In which case you may want to make some of those too, especially if you don't wanna fuck these girls. I mean idk why you're looking to be friends with girls exclusively if you at least didn't want to fuck them at some point.

>>17603408
Why? Because you spoke to him on facebook? You're thinking negatively for no reason, stop focusing on what could go wrong and think about what could go right. Why would he think badly of you for striking up a conversation with him? Honestly if he didn't like you he would already be dodging you and he isn't.

I can tell you last night a girl who was in the same situation as you started messaging me on facebook out of the blue, I'd seen her around but never considered anything, she was pretty forward with me and it turns out we have stuff in common and now I'm interested in seeing her. Stop being silly, promise you will at least send him a facebook message?

>>17603401
the longer you spend with someone the more you start considering them as a potential partner. so if you see that person every day you might start "feeling it" sooner or later.

google the term "office hot" for reference.

>>17603427
Thank you for the advice

>>17603440
You're welcome, I'm wishing you the best

>>17603432
>office hot
Oh my god I relate to that term so much. I kinda want to force myself to like this dude because lord knows I'll never have another dude show interest in me ever again for the rest of my life. I have zero dating options.

>>17603173
>how do i make him do X
this question gets asked way too much, you can't really control people
you can only control your own actions
so cowgirl up and go take some actions

>>17603398
>more on par with my culture
Yeah, the culture of women like the anon above, who think men should be dominant and women should assume the passive role in a relationship?
It's the same culture at the end of the day, the only difference is that white women like to pretend otherwise while indian women usually don't.

If you're talking to a guy and he says he is autistic, what goes through your head?

>>17603573
Stop talking to him

Guys two questions:

1. Would you go through some lengths to keep a girlfriend happy? For instance would you skip going to the gym to let HER go to the gym

2.When was the last time you got laid

Those who have bums and like anal:
>bottoms: how do you keep it free of blockage? I check in the shower the last few weeks and it's hit and miss if I hit anything.

>tops: what's your reaction/what do you do if you hit something up there?

>>17603577
Would you ever keep talking to him out of pity? I think this girl does and I don't really know whether to cut contact with her so it's better for the both of us.

>>17603583
I would because i wouldn't want him to become depressed but i dont think i could develop sexual attraction to him

>>17603579
>1. Would you go through some lengths to keep a girlfriend happy? For instance would you skip going to the gym to let HER go to the gym
Uh maybe, i don't really follow the question

>2.When was the last time you got laid
August 10, possibly thought

>>17603594
Possibly tonight

>>17603526
Theres a difference between wanting my dude to toss me around in bed and him telling me I'm not allowed to leave the house without him or another man at my side and that I'm not allowed to show my ankles lol. If you can't see that difference then best of luck to ya man.

Liking a dude who takes initiative and is actually capable of making moves and taking the lead from time to time =/= controlling every aspect of my life and telling me I'm inferior to him in every way.

>>17603407
ordinarily, i'd think that was it. he was the one who wanted to wait on that. so i mean, it's cool if that's it, but my gut's telling me that's not what it is.

I mean, I'm just gonna assume he's lost interest and play it real cool, but here's the thing, almost all of the last times we've texted, he's initiated, so I dunno.

>>17601689
>how do you flirt?
>just be yourself and show her you're interested in her by flirting
gee whiz

>>17603579
>For instance would you skip going to the gym to let HER go to the gym
I mean every relationship has some give and take, I'd go through some lengths to keep her happy but she has to be giving something back too.

>When was the last time you got laid
Years

>>17601857
>Being virgin is not the end of the world.
You're right, it's not. But being a virgin is the end of a relationship.

>>17603343
Think about what the cultural stereotypes are for other races. Now think of yours.

Indians are mostly famous for raping women to death with metal pipes, basically.

>>17603573
how the fuck do i deal with this and is it worth it and how high on the spectrum is he
>>17603343
carefully. like idk, I'm nice to people by default, so when a girl's nice, you gotta read it well. like, is she being nice in a friendly way? or is it more flirty?
good luck
>>17603304
it can be, you just gotta ride it out, see if you can develop it over time or if not, see if you can make a subtle change to make it work for ya

Met a girl in class a few weeks ago, and got her number to "study together" (after about 5 minutes of studying, we just started talking to each other about our lives). Would it be to soon to text her and ask tomorrow if she wanted to go to a nearby park?

Also I feel like I messed up by telling her about social anxiety I used to have, though she told me about similar problems she had, so maybe I didn't mess up too badly?

>>17603606
>not allowed to leave the house without him or another man at my side and that I'm not allowed to show my ankles
That's muslims, most indians aren't muslim. Sikhs aren't even particularly conservative afaik.

From what i've seen there's not nearly that big of a difference between urban (upper-class) indian and american values in regards to women's rights/responsibilities. It's just that in the US we pay a lot of lip service to feminist values, while this is rare in India outside of election season. In practice, we're not nearly as liberal as we look sometimes. Cultural expectations are still that men should take the fundamentally active and dominant role in the relationship, while women should be passive and submissive. Even if we don't say this out loud, we support it through our actions.

>>17603628
This. The bus story and others have gotten a shit-ton of worldwide press.

>>17603638
yeah, it might, but you could try it. i mean, how often do you see each other in person? personally i prefer asking those things in person, but I'm weird i guess. and i don't think you really messed up by telling her that.

>>17603615
Then he probably just found someone hotter than you to fuck, so now he doesn't need you as backup.

Why am I able to get cute girls in real life by approaching them. But on tinder I get fatties and just generally unpleasant looking girls? Not complaining, I just wont use tinder doesn't really effect anything, just curious.

>>17603652
oh okay
i'll hold onto that and it'll make everything okay

>>17603645
>how often do you see each other in person?
Every other weekday
But "studying" is the only time we've ever talked to each other for more than five minutes at once. Should I do lunch or something like that without pretending we're studying before asking her if she wants to go to the park, then?

>>17603643
So is that why Indians still like, marry off your daughters like you're selling cattle? lol. Indians treat women like garbage man. It's more than just "Oh women are supposed to be feminine, but still have equal footing" like it is in the states. Women are still treated more like people than objects (despite what the whiney 3rd wave feminists will say).

Also there's plenty of muslims in India lol. Something like over 100 million. May not be the majority but there's still quite a few. Sikhs are actually one of the smallest groups lol. There are LOTS of issues being a woman in India, it's rated in the top 20 worst places to be a woman in lol. They are truely second class people. That is not the case in America, hell I'd argue women are given more power than men these days. I'm really glad to be a woman in america, I get everything handed to me and all the protection in the world.

Also I'd love to actually see these "dominant men" in action lmao. I've never even SEEN a dude actually make an approach irl these days. They all hide behind their computer screens to make a move so that they don't have to face real rejection.

>>17603660
honest, different anon here. I've done this with ugly/fat girls I was foolish enough to lead on and had no idea how to let down nicely.

Maybe you're ugly/fat or weird.

>>17603657
Because online dating is reserved for bottom of the barrel people anyways, you wont find anyone good on there because there aren't anyone good on there. Why the fuck are you using it if you really can pull irl like you say

>>17603663
yeah, i'd do something like that. godspeed

>>17603683
i'm not ugly or fat, i'm working my way back down to a size I wanna be, I'm a little weird, but not in a bad way, or so i thought. idk i'll just let it go, even if it's weird that he'd keep texting me instead of just straight up ghosting me.

to be fair he has some serious shit going on right now and he did tell me to be patient, but i'm just jaded on this shit. rather be alone, you dig? so i'm not trying to excuse this. sorry i'm rambling, i'm tired.

>>17603686
Got really sick with pneumonia and was bed ridden so decided to give it a try for shitis n gigs while I laid there dying. It was pretty shit desu

Girls
I lost some weight recently, and consequentially girls are flirting with me a lot more. I don't know how to deal with flirting, and I wind up shutting down. Am I making girls angry or dissapointed by not reacting to flirting?

seriously are there any girls who haven't at the very least had an intimate physical encounter with another girl?

my girlfriend confessed to me "This will come as a surprise, but I've dated girls before"
"ok? why is that surprising exactly?"

>>17603693
obviously you wouldn't rather be alone or you wouldn't have this on your mind.

"i'd rather be alone, I need to be single for a while" is either A: Bitter single person trying to justify their singledom. Or B: a bullshit lie you tell your partner when you're dumping them.


Be honest with yourself at the very least

>>17603696
>am I making girls angry or disappointed
yes because you're such a catch, they'll toss and turn every night well into their 40's because of that one mr right who got away.

>>17603699
yeah, actually, am being honest with myself. this is bothering me because i thought he liked me.
but i do need to work on myself right now because i just uncovered some more shit from my past that is really, really, really fucking with me hard. so on the one hand, i like this guy and wanna be with him, but on the other, i really just want to be alone to sort this shit out and try to forgive myself and others involved in the shit I haven't gotten past yet.

but i appreciate your input. thanks. it actually hasn't bothered me as much since i dug up my past, but hey, it's still there a little bit.

>>17603707
>need to be alone to work on myself
This is a weird millennial meme that needs to stop. You can work on yourself while in a relationship, just because you're in a relationship doesn't mean you all of a sudden fuse into one being. You're still singular you. Your relationship should have NOTHING to do with how you're able to treat and work on yourself.

>>17603693
>i'm not ugly or fat, i'm working my way back down to a size I wanna be,
Coming as a fatty, you gotta stop deluding yourself. To guys, theres only fat and not fat. If you weren't fat, you wouldn't need to be "working down" Just accept you're still fat and keep working on it. But know you wont get anyone whos willing to be seen with you until you're skinny. I'm in the same boat, until I hit that respectable look I can't expect anyone to show actual interest in me. But I'm not going to pretend im not fat either. Youre either fat or youre skinny. There is no inbetween like people wanna pretend there is to save face.

>>17603726
This is an anon I like. YOU are going to make it anon.

>>17603712
well, yeah, i realize this.
but please understand this, I do not want to drag someone else into this mess right now. I have the power to change it, and if I can fix it and tell the story later, that's what I prefer. I know I can fix it whether I'm alone or with someone, but I'd rather do this while I'm still single.

besides, from what y'all are telling me, he's a lost cause anyway and I'm not going to end up with him, so what's the point?

>>17603679
>Also I'd love to actually see these "dominant men" in action lmao. I've never even SEEN a dude actually make an approach irl these days.
Are you serious? It happens all the time. Online dating is becoming more of a thing but it's still a distinct minority. You also seem to be misplacing a lot of the appeal of online dating, in many cases it's worse if you're trying to avoid rejection. The way it manages to destroy your self esteem is a common point of discussion with the topic, you're going to be ignored 95% of the time. You can usually score a date at least a quarter of the time irl on the flipside.

>>17603730
The point is to not close your self off to a potential Mr. Right.

That dude is done, get him out of your mind. Hit the gym, confront your demons and be open to people.

>>17603696
Disappointed maybe, but no more so than you would feel disappointed not getting any reaction out of a girl you thought was cute.
>>17603697
Do forced encounters count? Because I was raped by a girl as a child, and therefore now I want nothing to do with them sexually. Triggers me bad.
So if you don't count the time I was held down and fingered and my head forced into her pussy as an 8 year old, I've never had a sexual encounter with another girl and I never will.

>>17603729
I find the first step is admitting you have a problem. Did my time wallowing in self pity, pretending like I wasn't a rolling blob of disgust and was "perfectly healthy and normal" for too many years. Then I realized that was getting me nowhere and if I ever wanted to actually be someone's qt3.14 wifu one day, and not the girl you sneak out the back after fucking once so your friends don't find out you fucked someone that disgusting for the lulz, I gotta lose the weight.
20lbs to go to my goal. I'll be a 100lb respectable girlfriend even if it kills me.

>>17603726
actually, i'm skinny, appreciate the input, again, but really, i just have a bit of beer paunch. other than that, i'm skinny. and actually, skinny people do work down, to get to a healthier state, more muscle, etc. I'm working for tone and muscle, because I feel weak as hell.

but yeah guess I'm fat because of the little gut I've always had. thanks much

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>>17603734
Never seen it ever. I sit around in bars every other weekend, I watch all the usual social venues. Never once been approached, never once seen another woman be approached lol. Dudes are too scared these days.

>>17603747
Fuck yeah slut YOU CAN DOO IT

>>17603750
Stomach fat is the worst fat to have. If you have even the slightest pouch, you're fat. Chubby at best. It may not be the medically correct thing, but socially it is. You have fat outside your ass/tits, you're fat. Thats the way the beauty norm goes.
Skinny is the goal, if you're at the goal you only need to maintain. Theres no more working down needed.

You're welcome, lose the stomach fat and you'll have a better chance at getting a guy.

>>17603736
you know, I don't have to be at my peak fitness for someone to fall in love with me, okay? jesus, it's the same damn thing with the whole "oh you can work on yourself and be in a relationship"

I'm not going to work on myself just so I can find "mr right" and I'm not closing myself off to anyone. I'm working on myself so that I can be happy with myself. I can be happy all on my own, I don't need anyone for that.

but thanks, this really helped me open my own damn eyes

>>17603769
okay first of all that's ridiculous
second of all, my boobs go out farther than my stomach
third, i just don't give a fuck. i'm not fucking losing weight just so I can attract a partner. i'm losing it so i can live a longer life tormenting the people who piss me off. jesus christ. skinny isn't the goal. muscle and toning is. thanks.

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>>17603766
Oh anon, I know I can do it when you believe in me.

>>17603750
Gut is fine for me personally. If it's a bump then no problem. I get turned off when it radiates to the arms, legs, etc. Chubby is pure shit, a bit of a bump or "gut" is 100% acceptable in my case kind of encouraged.

>>17603778
Go be one of the evil women the bitter betas on this board resent. AND NEVER LOOK BACK

>>17603779
my arms and calves are pretty tiny lol. but i have stupidly muscular thighs. i've been doing 100+ squats a day to keep 'em in line though.

>>17603759
Then the issue sounds to be more with you. Maybe you just have resting bitch face, because I'm sure as fuck not going to be approaching a woman with closed off body language. A lot of women seem to be ignorant of that actually, if you don't seem to be interested in my company why would I want to stick around or take the initiative?

My friends have been approached, and sometimes the guys are persistent to the point it becomes a reason they avoid going to certain types of events.

>>17603777
Whatever you say man, doesn't matter if your tits stick out more. If theres a gut, socially you're fat. Want proof, go post a pic on soc and ask if youre chubby or average lol.
> i'm not fucking losing weight just so I can attract a partner
> skinny isn't the goal
lol enjoy being single. I've been playing the fat girls game for years now, I've been rejected by hundreds of guys for being too fat. You gotta be skinny to get a date with anyone who's not a fat neckbeard themselves, or the rare dude that's actually good looking but for some reason has such garbage self esteem he feels like he has to settle and date way below his league. In which case that's a relationship thats dead in the water because he will realize he can do better and dump you for a hotter chick eventually. Those are the cards you have to have to win the dating game.
>>17603782
kek they hate me because I actually had the drive to fix myself and get a bf.

>>17601857
Letting the girl take the lead in anything is the worst advice you could give a man. Especially when it comes to sex.

>>17603792
Ahem,
> never once seen another woman be approached lol.
It's not just me dude. I've seen real 10/10s sit around laying the batting eyelashes on thick, just silently screaming for a dude to come talk to her. She always has to give up and go to them lol

Maybe its an area thing idk, where I've ever lived though, no dude has ever made the initiative that I've seen personally lol. And not with lack of trying.

>>17603793
>soc
been there, done that, never got called fat on soc.
lol being single is great. i'm super independent and hate almost everyone anyway. I just happened to genuinely get along with him which sucks, but also doesn't because now I know people like him exist.
but it's cool, you can keep trying to force your skinny beliefs on me. looks fade, anyway.

>>17603793
>kek they hate me because I actually had the drive to fix myself and get a bf.

And it's the greatest feeling in the world, I was always a skinny mother fucker (and really it never bothered me I always got girls) Untill one day I was told it should bother me, and as much as I tried to fight it, it just seaped into my psyche and BAM I had no game anymore, and no self confidence. Instead of crying I started working out and before I even got an ounce of muscle my confidence came back and I was back talking to cuties and dating women.

>>17603797
One of the biggest things I've seen repeated in modern dating culture is to "date within your league". If you consider yourself a 6 and believe in that line, why would you go after a 10 if you're fairly confident you'd get shut down, and could just go for someone a few points lower but with a good success rate?

Dating is in large part about hedging your bets.

>>17603793
>I've been rejected by hundreds of guys for being too fat. You gotta be skinny to get a date with anyone who's not a fat neckbeard themselves
I guess I'm lost here, do you think it should work otherwise? You're less than thrilled at the prospect of dating a fat neckbeard, so why would a guy want to date the female equivalent?

>>17603811
>date within your league
You mean, date within what you determine your league is. I live in Victoria BC. The ratio of women to men is way out of whack there's an insane amount more girls than there are guys, so that means that every guy gets a confidence boost and labels his looks way higher than it actually is.

If you're average looking, but you carry yourself like bradd pitt you're going to score the 9/10s

>>17603804
Again, just trying to help you in the long run. If you're genuinely ok with being single then what's the problem. Just be single lol
>Looks fade
Yeah thats why guys dump chicks and trade in for a hotter model every couple years. Women age like milk, you gotta get it while you can because he'll continue to pull younger, more attractive women far past your capabilities to pull younger men. Why waste your small window of attractiveness, you wont get another opportunity when you're dating in your 30's fighting for the rejects with the rest of womankind.
>>17603808
Ah, I'm still waiting for that day. Still have so much fat to lose. I'll make it there. I'll be hot enough to fuck without a bag one day. Hopefully I'll still have time to get out there though, my clocks ticking, I'll be too old to date in about a decade.

if a girl here could try to help me understand my gf id appreciate it

>yesterday morning, made gf some tea and breaky
>says shes really sleepy and a bit sick but still randy
>we get in bed and get naked
>she gets in the way she does when shes gonna blow me
>eventually does even though something seems of
>find her crying afterwards in the bathroom
>has barely spoken to me since then

like in 2 od years nothing like this has happened and i asked her to tell me whats up but i got nothing

>>17603811
Still, there should be 6 girls getting hit on by 6 dudes right? There have been plenty of people I've seen in the same league. None of those dudes ever approached a woman.

>>17603825
>my clocks ticking
This is all too true, for me my prime will be in a decade, and in a decade for you, well lets just say men have it better in the dating scene in theiri 30's. Just keep it up.

>>17603818
That was exactly my point dingis, if you want an attractive mate, you need to be attractive yourself. Nobody wants to date fatty magee, only ones who do are shit people anyways. If you're content being the "better than nothing" option I guess you can continue to be fat and date fatty too.
>>17603829
can do

>>17603827
1.She cheated on you
2.She's on her period
3.Your dick had dick cheese
4.She remembered the season finale of the walking dead and how bad it was and the new season isn't going to make up for it, and even the graphic novels suck now.
5.She found lipstick around your dick

>>17603834
>That was exactly my point dingis
Misread you then. I just know this one chick that's like 5 foot and 250 lb, who wants the stereotypical jacked guy and whines about it. Always annoyed me with her double standards and I tend to have my perspective tainted by that.

>>17603840
>always annoyed me with her double standards
yeah well the jacked guys are annoyed with her double chin

>>17603840
Yeah Like I said in an earlier post, I did my time wallowing in self pity, expecting guys to "Like me for who I ammmmmm" *barf* Then logic set in when I realized I didn't want a fat guy so why should a skinny guy like me?

No girl should be above 115, unless they're amazon women. Theres no excuse for it, losing weight is not hard.

>>17603828
>Still, there should be 6 girls getting hit on by 6 dudes right?
And I see that all the time. But to reiterate, a lot of women are absolutely shit with body language. There's a lot of overlap between that and the women I know that can't score a date.

When I go to the bar, most of the women I see have a bit of a surely look going on, often have their arms closed and generally seem to want to be left alone. Why would a guy approach that? The girl that's smiling and dancing tends to get approached a lot on the flipside. A friend of mine is a pretty bubbly person and people conflate that with interest all the time.

>>17603837

she is on her period, but even then, would having your period illicit that kind of response?

she wouldnt cheat and nor would i, i know her well enough

>>17603852
>she wouldnt cheat and nor would i, i know her well enough
I'm not saying she's cheating but damn. That statement, is so absurdly ignorant it hurts.

>>17603849
>Then logic set in when I realized I didn't want a fat guy so why should a skinny guy like me?
She rationalizes it with beauty standards being subjective or something. We were both working on our weight issues but she gave up like 10 pounds in, but wanted me to still be down to date when I hit my goal weight despite that. Fuck I'm still annoyed by that.

>>17603850
Well my point being, statistically I should have witnessed SOMETHING even remotely dominant if there were actually as many dominant men as you say. But I haven't. Shit body language aside, truly dominant men would make the attempt anyway because they wouldn't actually care if it didn't work.

So I have to conclude there aren't nearly as many dominant men as you think there are. Most of them are pussy shits afraid of something, rejection, or false rape accusation mostly. Latters kinda justifiable I'll give. But it all still equates to a lack of dudes making the first move.

>>17603855

and for most people i would have to agree with you, but my gf is pretty far from most people, hell when i told her i lost my v card to a girl i wasnt going out with she was almost shocked by the notion

>>17603863
I mean, idk why you're associating with a blimp anyways. I guess since you're fat yourself it make sense, but still. If she annoys you then roll her back into the ocean already.
>She rationalizes it with beauty standards being subjective or something
Kek classic fatty excuses, "I don't have to put effort into being a real human being, but I expect total hotties to want to not vomit on my rolls."

since we are all discussing weight, my gf used to be skinny because of her lifestyle, but as she got older she kind of stopped doing things and started eating more, so my question is have any dudes her been in the same spot and managed to work with their gf in getting her to lose weight?

When is it okay to slip girls the tongue? I've made out with her once before and probably will again soon, I didn't the first time because it was fairly quick - how long should we be making out before i do it?

>>17603865
>I should have witnessed SOMETHING even remotely dominant if there were actually as many dominant men as you say.
Anecdotal evidence is shit for many reasons. One of them is people tend to only notice what matches up with what they believe.

>Most of them are pussy shits afraid of something, rejection, or false rape accusation mostly
Yeah, it's a real mystery why you're not being approached.

Just got head from an older girl 2bh
She wouldn't have sex with me because she only does relationship sex and was sexually assaulted by her ex boyfriend when she was blackout drunk 2 years ago

Do girls really dwell on past sexual experiences with new partners?

>>17603877
Easy.

Get j00cy yourself, and talk to very attractive women ENTIRELY PLATONICALLY. I repeat make NO advances, do not "flirt" talk to them like human beings. Naturally your gf will realize she has to work on herself to maintain a relationship with a good lookin' stud like yourself.


Lead the charge

>>17603877
Dumping them usually helps lol. She's gotten too comfortable, she will continue to inflate until you threaten to leave her. She needs to remember you can get much hotter women than her, and that if she wants to keep you around she's gotta keep up with the hotter younger women

>>17603874
>I mean, idk why you're associating with a blimp anyways.
Because I was a blimp myself and once upon a time I was laboring under the impression that she was interested on working on our weight loss together. Then I guess she decided weight loss was hard and started feeding me all of that bullshit.

I'm still kind of interested in dating a chubster that also wants to do something like that but it's looking like I'll just reach my goal weight solo and then try to date around.

>>17603899
Never, I repeat NEVER. Make plans to lose weight with someone.

It's all solo baby

>>17603881
kek Well back atcha. You only see what you wanna see I guess. Just sayin, there are billions of people who believe in god even though they've never seen him. I just can't put blind faith in shit. Seeings believing, I aint seen shit.
>Yeah, it's a real mystery why you're not being approached.
kek, you just don't seem to like the fact I've never witnessed this magical phenomena of dominant men. Again, I've got nothing to do with it. Even if they aren't coming to me, theres no reason they shouldnt be going to other women then. Besides, they'll never know my personality if they don't approach. The approach is 100% based on looks dumdum. You approach someone you find physically appealing, and then decide if you're still interested after getting to know them. Thats the way it's worked since the beginning of time
The answer to the mystery on why I personally don't get approached, is simply because I'm no 10. There are better looking women, so I get overlooked. You can see the attraction guys have for these women, but they never make the move.

>>17603899
lol never settle for fat. Like I said theres only fat and skinny, fuck off with the sugar coating "chubby" line. If you're fat, you can only date fat. If youre skinny, you date skinny. Fatties have no business dating anyway, they should be putting their focus into becoming desirable. They can date all they want when they become skinny. So just git gud, get skinny, and then enjoy the good life. Fatties only weigh you down

>>17603926
>lol never settle for fat.
Well the idea was to wait until we were not fat. But yeah.

>>17603926
are you the recovering fatty? What's your weight/height now?

>>17603954
5'3 120. These final 20 are just stubborn, and I've gotten weak and stopped fasting. Need to get my willpower back.

>>17603911
>kek, you just don't seem to like the fact I've never witnessed this magical phenomena of dominant men.
I just think it's stupid. It's equivalent to a guy bitching about how women are heartless harpies. He'd probably claim he'd never seen a kind woman, and I'd also call him an idiot.

>>17603966
good shit, got kik? I'll be your weight lost confidant and jerk off to your progress pics

>>17603969
Eh, like I said, if I would just see one I could believe.

>>17603971
kek, I'm not all that comfortable sharing pics. Too disgusting to be fapable.
>Inb4 "ill be the judge of that"
But seriously, I'm still far too fat to fuck, or be fuckable. Even in cyber form.

>>17603984
you underestimate me woman

>>17603985
Although, I do have a kink for watching dudes jerk off. If you wouldn't expect me to contribute, I'd happily watch sometime.

>>17603994
flattering, heres my throwaway skype: jayocaine1

>>17604001
kek, I'll add you tomorrow after I figure out what my throwaway was again. I gotta get to bed now though. This thread will likely be dead by morning lol

>>17604009
k

>>17601116
>schizophrenia
This is the mental equivalent of AIDS, what a fucking awful disease.

>>17603883
>Do girls really dwell on past sexual experiences with new partners?
Not really, but in your situation she does because it involves trauma and abuse. A healthy, well-adjusted girl won't (and shouldn't) have a lot of hang-ups about that sort of thing. I hope you can work something out if you decide to hook up with her again.

What are some signs that a girl is only interested in me because she's lonely and thus only wants me to be around for her. Like, she doesn't see herself going out with me.

What are the differences in signs between her genuinely showing interest vs. her just being lonely and her showing interest is only temporary?

>>17603173
I remember a Dead Kennedys song that goes like "Why don't you take your social regulations and shove em up your ass?". What does that have to do with the advice? Guess what, it's not like HE has to start the conversation. YOU are the one interested? YOU start the flirting, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it. Also, i guarantee you most guys would love being approached by a girl instead of the contrary.

Girls,

I have a decent relationship with my parents but they constantly bicker with each other and despise interacting with others. My dad in particular is an undiagnosed narcissist that likes taking full control of a get together and having everything done his way. They are the number one reason I'm single.

How would you take it if I introduced you to other friends and family first? By keeping them out of the picture (at first) I think it will help them realize they are a huge problem. It also allows you to see that I have some sane and laid back people in my family.

I have tried talking to them in the past and they are the type of people that don't consider anything in life to be their fault.

>>17604162
She described it as she was really drunk and he wasnt then she passed out and he kept going
I guess that could be sexual assault