ITT: Ask the Opposite Gender Anything

How can vaginas be real if tfw no gf

Is being stood up worse than being groped?

For the girls, what kind of hobbies adds value to the attractiveness of a man?

Also, what kind of hobbies would make him less attractive?

Dateless virgin here

I think I've got a date this weekend. What should I do? How will I know if it's actually a date or not? Should I pay even though she asked me out?

>>17592960
Well, sharing my hobbies makes you more attractive to me (duh).
I don't think I have a determined set of hobbies I find attractive. In general it's about doing something active - it might be something artistic or creative (writing, making music, painting - let's just hope I like your art), outdoorsy or adventurous (hiking, climbing, kayak, whatever), or anything related to DIY.

If your hobbies are listening to music, playing videogames and watching tv it gets boring. Like you don't actually DO anything.

>>17592978
Well, was the word date mentioned?

You are not obligated, no. Usually the person who asks out pays. But you would surely make a better impression if you pay.

>>17592955
>Is being stood up worse than being groped?

I'm a dude, and having experienced both...

Probably depends on the person.

Me, personally, I give close to no fucks about being groped (I've been groped by both women and men), but being stood up kind of really sucks.

I lose all respect for whoever groping me, but because I'm a dude I don't really have a sense of danger from it, even when it's another dude (I'm straight but my best friend is gay and I hang out with them at a gay bar on occasion. It happens. The first few times I was shocked, and uncomfortable, but now I'm pretty numb to it at this point.).

Were I a girl, I could see how that sense of danger would make it all much worse.

I know when my girlfriend gets groped, her first instant is to defend herself with anything available.

She once got yelled at at work (she had a fucking terrible, cunt of a boss. She basically bullied her every day until she quit, and threatened to tell HER boss exactly why she was quitting unless she wrote a good letter of rec. ) because someone grabbed her ass while she was going to drop off the mail and her first instinct was to turn around, rip the pen out of her hair, and brandish it at him.

But as a rape survivor, she's also kind of an extreme case.

We all have different circumstances that make us who we are.

>>17592978
>I think I've got a date this weekend. What should I do? How will I know if it's actually a date or not? Should I pay even though she asked me out?

Just relax and try to have fun. Don't focus on dumb shit like labels, things you should do, or random expectations.

Expect nothing.

Expectations are how you fuck yourself over.

Just pretend you're going out to do whatever the fuck you were doing by yourself, and you just happened to meet a really cool stranger there who was doing the same thing, and you're just doing what you're doing while getting to know them.

Follow the flow of things.

When it comes to the check, same thing.

Where do I find a qt3.14 Mega Man fangirl that understands me?

>>17592991
What if he has some kind of "contemplative" hobby, like being a cinephile and watching lots of films and studying about directors and stuff? Is that unattractive?

>>17592996
>was the word date mentioned?
No it wasn't, but she's picking me up and we're getting dinner. It sounds like a date to me, but that could just be wishful thinking. Either way I'm going to man up and ask her out on a(nother) date at the end of the night (or at least, that's what I'm hoping I'll do).

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>>17592991
>In general it's about doing something active
I don't really get that. Many of my hobbies are "active", but women have rarely given a fuck about them one way or another because they either have no interest in it or it takes too much investment to get started.

>>17593005
It is not necessarily unattractive. It gets unattractive to me if all your time is spent on contemplative hobbies and you don't do anything active.
Watching movies is at the same level as reading.

>>17593012
I recently went out with a girl a few times. All could be considered dates, dinner, museums, movies. I showed interest through eye contact, touching, made her laugh a lot, she wanted to do a shitton of plans with me...

Then I told her about wanting to take her to a special date and she told me about her having a boyfriend. I mean, sure I guess I should've tried to get to know that earlier, but I thought asking directly about bf is awkward. She just had fun with me as a friend.

So yeah don't instantly assume it's a date.

>>17593033
I've been friends with this girl for a while, and I know she doesn't have a boyfriend. Also I've been attempting to flirt with her lately (albeit probably poorly), so I think she's at least vaguely aware of interest from me.


Since we met I've thought that she was interested, but I've always tried to find other excuses for it, because I haven't been confident enough to believe I had a chance with her. Now I've decided I'd rather be wrong about her being interested than wrong about her being uninterested.

>>17593027
I don't necessarily want to join you in your hobbies, or be interested in it. It is a plus, obviously, but not something necessary. I guess I just don't want to see my boyfriend spending all his free time being a lazy sack of shit.

My boyfriend plays softball, and I cannot bring myself to watch a full match without wishing I was aborted. But I still find it nice that he's doing something with his friends, being physically active, enjoying himself. I ask him about it every time he comes home, and let him talk to me about it even if I don't give a shit because I am happy he's enthusiastic about it.

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>>17592991
>If your hobbies are listening to music, playing videogames and watching tv it gets boring. Like you don't actually DO anything.

>>17593033
>>17593012
>>17592996
>>17592978
Non-dateless person here,
Now, a lot of people dislike calling them dates at any point in the relationship. I don't know why. So the absense of the word isn't much of an indication of anything.

>>17592991
Is driving around to explore the area a sufficiently active hobby, or is that a bit too close to the listening to music tier hobbies?

>>17593058
I don't know - in general unless me and said guy are clearly into each other (like - we're physical) if he doesn't call it date I don't assume it is a date.
I pay my half of the bill, and just treat it as I'd treat a lunch with my sister.

>>17593062
I am not a hobby guru. That's my personal taste. I'm sure that there are people who are crazy for guys who play games and watch tv and listen to music.
I do all those things. And at the end do whatever you like, you really shouldn't be faking hobbies to get girls to fuck you.

>Is driving around to explore the area a sufficiently active hobby?
It's cool, I do the same, but I like actually going out of the car and hiking/walking around the towns I find/eating/doing shit.

>>17593058
What should I be on the lookout for to figure out if she means for this to be a date or just to be spending time with friends? How do I make it clear that I want to date her if it's necessary for me to do that?

>>17592960
Cars, building/fixing shit, video games, making music, fishing, firearms, brewing, dancing, hiking/camping/climbing, hockey, comic books, reading, and shitposting.

Crossdressing and protesting.

>>17593077
Hello. I've read your other posts. It's a date. Treat it as such. That's the mindset you go into this with.

girls:
I don't live in the West so I don't know how its done there but do girls appreciate if I meet her parents first to talk about seriously dating their daughter.

>>17593111
Is this really a question?
No, I'm not a propriety, you don't have to ask my dad the permission to take me out for dinner.
Treat me like a person and ask me.

>>17593118
yes it's a valid question because it's different in every country/culture

>>17593111
Nope, just make a good impression on her parents when you do get introduced to them. Getting their blessing before marriage is still seen as a sweet gesture for the most part. And if she's the sort who'd get bristly over that, you'll know well before you've reached the point of getting engaged.

Both genders,
How to become more romatically "threatening"? All girls i meet look to me as asexual being. Thing is that i can be smooth talker but that doesnt lead anywhere.

>>17593123
My fiancé talked to my parents before he asked me to marry him, but we already had discussed the possibility of getting married and I agreed on that before.
If you asked them about something we haven't discussed first, I'd be mildly disgusted.

>>17593129
Not quite sure what you're meaning to convey here, elaborate a bit?

>>17593136
why did you assume that I implied that it wasn't discussed between the girl before meeting the parents?

>>17593148
Because otherwise you'd know if said girl appreciated it or not, and you wouldn't need to ask it here.

>>17593138
Girls find more as a friend/brother material than boyfriend/lover one.

>>17593129
You're unattractive, for some reason. We cannot know why since we don't know you.

I'd suggest to
>Make yourself more attractive
>Ask girls out/escalate things physically quickly

>>17593170
>being physical unattractive in the only thing
When this meme will die?

>>17593174
Not just physically. Might have an unattractive personality or not be too bland and boring.
How would we know, tho, why he is unattractive?

>>17593156
Ahh ok, now I get ya. You mentioned knowing how to smooth talk them so I'll assume you know how to flirt and create sexual tension and whatnot. My advice is to mix the two. Do whatever you're doing that makes them see you as a brother/friend and add some flirting. Be sincere about it. The only real difference between smooth talking and actual flirting is whether you actually mean the shit you're saying or just trying to get laid. You follow me?

>>17593198
Flirting is something i can do it but physical contact becomes too much as i start overthinking whenever i do this or that and it comes half-assed.

>>17593129
it doesnt lead enywhere because you dont lead it anywhere

Girls:
I'm flirting with this girl I really like and she doesn't mind the physical attention but she already has a boyfriend. Should I just stop the flirting? I know since she has a boyfriend I won't get her but being able to hold her hands and brush her cheeks and hair is too hard to pass up.

>>17593212
Don't think then, just do.
Overthinking has been kicking my ass for years too. What I've found is that if I can get myself into the habit of taking action as soon as the thought enters my head, things work out better. The longer I hesitate, the more time I have to contemplate and pick it all apart and paralyze myself by inaction. Trusting my instincts to autopilot stuff is the solution.

>>17593242
Seems reasonable but how can trust instincts in situation you've never been before? Its seems like i become either too passive due to extreme overthinking or too goofy and inappropriate.

>>17593227
Lol come on you really need us to answer this for you man?

>>17593247
I know *exactly* what you mean. That's how you develop those instincts though. You just gotta power through it. It'll balance out.

I'm the guy who thought I may have done some sexual things without this English girl's consent after an engagement party

Well I apologised and she said I did nothing wrong and was very respectful

>>17593256
Gonna try to sharpen those instincts. Maybe you have to happen to run into same problem as me when you talk with girl and disassociate from the whole thing and feel like being in movie or it comes to the realization that isnt happening to you?

>>17593271
Huh. Maybe that's what it's like... Hey is that feeling when you get it a good feeling or bad? To answer your question, no, I can't recall ever feeling that way myself. It's reminded me of something I read recently about religious experiences and that a certain % of people's brains just aren't wired to be able to have them. Been meaning to ask somebody what those are like. Is that what they're like??

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Yo femanon's, my current gf dosen't have that high of a sex drive or maybe I am just shitty at sex or not romantic or whatever the fuck. I may be in the fact be the worse partner in the world and she just hasn't had the heart to tell me.

I just don't know but point is I have been kinda doing it by myself lately. and I kinda feel like she would feel kinda pissed or like disapproving/disappointed. Already have mentioned that I would like to have more fishy squishy time and she just kinda shrugged it off and started talking about where we were going to eat. Should i just like cool my jets or what? 2 times a week is pretty lame desu.

>>17593291
This is all too common. Not sure why. Does she cum easily?

girls:
Do any of you date with the intention of marraige in your early 20s. Many women decide to marry in their late 20s at the earlist. Personally hope to marry a woman in her early 20s.

>>17593298
Yeah she climaxes pretty quickly generally, twice is generally her limit and then kinda just wants to cuddle. 3 times if I am lucky.

>>17593310
Some do but I don't think it's really the norm. Can thank feminism for that one.

>>17593315
That's a good sign. Does she turn you down when you try to initiate it or does she just not initiate it herself that much?

>>17593289
Its not like religious experiences but more like short disconnect-reconnect things when you think that you isnt the real you and you merely looking through other personal perspective like in first person games. Its gets really weird because of sensation that current things doesnt happen to you but to someone else.

>>17593327
I try to initiate it when I feel like it but she often tells me she is tired or is too focused on her college homework or league of legends or something. She only initiates it when its like a special occasion or when she dosent see me for while because sometimes I go out to my old folks place to work for a few days.

this qt girl I matched with on tinder lists anime as one of her 4 interests. is it alright if I open by just asking her is she has been watching any anime lately?

If its in her interests I figure that means she likes to talk about anime, but my brain is so hardwired to thinking that opening a conversation with a girl by bringing up anime is the most autistic thing I could do

Two questions, both for anyone.

Girlfriend said that she 'felt safe' with me. What did she mean by that?

Had a dream that I was cheating on her. Does this have any greater psychological meaning?

Not for a specific gender, but I don't think it's important enough to make a thread. What's a good place to find people to talk to one on one online? I feel lonely and I'm going through some stuff I could use a distraction from lately, bu most of the people I know online all have their own things going on or are seldom available. I'm trying to make real life friends, but in the interim I really need people who I can just hang out with.

>>17593380
I would suggest chatrooms, omegle,or /soc/ but those are where many of the scum of the earth dwell. Mayhaps a MMO community?

>>17593336
Hmm. Interesting. Grounding exercises might help with that if you don't like it. Those are basically paying attention to the ground sort of. Like, if you're standing up, shift your weight from foot to foot just a tiny slight little bit or press down with your toes. If you're sitting wiggle your ass in your seat a tiny bit. The point is to make yourself aware of the space your body is currently inhabiting via deliberately processing the physical stimuli of whatever you're in contact with. Taking notice of the way the dirt crunches when you move your foot or how hard/soft the chair you're sitting in are just two simple examples, pretty much anything will work. What temperature is the air? What have you got in your hands? Is there a breeze? Are you leaned against a wall? Makes it harder to detach mentally from your physical form if you're aware of all the tangible interactions it's currently having.

>>17593375
>Girlfriend said that she 'felt safe' with me. What did she mean by that?
You make her feel secure, comfortable, and protected. Like she can let her guard down. An all around very good thing.
>Had a dream that I was cheating on her. Does this have any greater psychological meaning?
Nope. Dreams can sometimes reflect reality, but they do so in unexpected ways. If you're hearing about cheating a lot, in media, from friends who're cheating on their partners, or being cheated on, it might pop up in your dreams on. It could even pop up for betrayals or lies in general or for no reason. Try not to dwell on it overmuch, those kinds of dreams can make you feel bad but they're not a big deal at all.

>>17593342
Nothing is really jumping to mind here man, I'm sorry. There are certain questions that, though it may seem counterintuitive at first glance, you're much better off asking advice on from another dude rather than us. I'm thinking this is one of those questions.

>>17593392
An MMO probably wouldn't be a bad idea in theory, but the last time I got into one I became badly addicted and spent all my waking hours on it where I wasn't at school playing it. I really don't ever want to let myself touch an MMO again.

>>17593409
Then make sure the MMO sucks? lol

I don't know I joined a few fighting game communities and met a lot of really great people through that. Maybe through similar means you could search out a discord server?

>>17593372
Breaking out with senpai onii (onni?) chan tsundere yandere pls be my 3dpd waifu in your opening message to a romantic interest who's given no indication of being into anime would be hella autistic. That's not the case here though. I know fuckall about tinder but if you have to narrow down your interests to 4 things and anime made the cut, I think you can safely set aside the concern;)

>>17593372
>If its in her interests I figure that means she likes to talk about anime, but my brain is so hardwired to thinking that opening a conversation with a girl by bringing up anime is the most autistic thing I could do

As a male who has done online dating successfully (Currently 18 months in to a relationship that started online.)

1.) it's tinder, who gives a fuck
2.) By anime, she probably means she likes Miyazaki, Avatar (I know it's not anime), Pokemon, fruits baskets or some other shit. Not necessarily that she's up to date with the latest season of Macros Delta, ReZero Kara Hejmeru Isekai or some shit.

Those are two completely fucking different things. (If the above didn't make it obvious, my anime nerd levels are top tier. Over the last couple dacdes I'm probably hitting the thousands mark for shows seen. My girlfriend has watched anime too, but she's definitely the other kind I mentioned. She's pretty much exclusively only ever watched stuff like Miyazaki and Ouran Host Club.)

You can go ahead and ask the question if you want, it doesn't really matter to be honest, but if it's not something she's super interested in it, that's probably the end of the conversation--especially if that's a question every other anime geek instantly fires at her.

When you're doing online dating, you're better off making up unique questions that actually engage them and make them think. That way, even if they don't find you attractive, they'll be inclined to answer back, just because the conversation seem like it'd be fun.

Best of luck.

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>>17592998
>hurrd durr im niot in danger

w e w

you must be really cucked

if you are a dude, and you grope me, i'll fucking kill you. end of story. i know most other MEN that aren't cucks or numales like yourself, would say the same.

have fun falling for the feminist meme, it won't get you anywhere though

>>17593261
Wow i read her totally wrong
She wants me to be around this weekend

>>17592921
Girls,

Do you ever go on a date and order a sandwich or salad, not because you're trying to be cute and dainty but because you're worried about spending too much of his money, or being seen as high maintenence?

I went out to eat with a guy the other day and I was ready to order a T-bone, with an appetizer, etc. but then he said he would pick up the tab so I decided to go with something cheaper instead.

>>17593587
>you're worried about spending too much of his money
Nigger, split the bill with those dainty whores. Women can work and make money, this men paying for dates meme needs to end

>>17593587
Yeah, especially if he offers to pay. I think its alright to be on your best behavior on the first couple of dates, when you get to know him a little better you can come out of your shell. But if you wanna pig out then >>17593600 is right, you should try to pay your way.

how do i know if it's okay to kiss her

how do i kiss her

How likely is it a crush I've had since elementary school and haven't seen in over 10 years and have never even had a real conversation with, respond to a random message saying basically a more personalized hey i used to really like you would you like to meet up sometime and get to know each other?

>>17593608
Dude you honestly just need to put your mouth close to hers and she'll let you know if it's okay
Tbh I never really know who kisses first with girls, often seems the girl does, but it's always me who makes the move to kiss if that makes sense

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Girls, I need your advice on how I should proceed

I met a girl on facebook really randomly about 10 days ago. We started chatting about random stuff, and just really hit it off
We started staying up late every night talking to each other, and quite quickly got more and more intimate

In the last 10 days we've gone from her revealing that she was raped by her ex, which has led to her being single for a fair while now, because she finds it hard to trust
To flirting more and more with each other and making our intentions clear, to the point of sending lovey dovey poetry and songs and shit to each other
To the point where we're sexy talking each other and had a cyber sesh.
Shes said to me "Im really lucky to have you" and wished I was there with her multiple times

And theres the catch: She lives eastern europe, Im in england.
I feel like we really have a connection, and have a lot in common and theres a lot of potential for a great relationship there, but we havent met yet.

She's been extremely receptive and reciprocal with all my affection towards her. So now Im coming to the difficult part:

Do I lay my cards out on the line, and just ask her straight up if she thinks theres potential for a relationship between us? I feel like we should at least meet and see how it feels

But that would involve the commitment of myself booking a weekend away to go stay in her city. Which as a student is a fairly big commitment to make

She has plans to come over to England and live here full time in the next couple months, but nothing concrete yet

Am I wrong that I want to test the waters for potential commitment?

Ideally I wanna just go and meet her in person and get to know her physically, and we can spend the weekend doing whatever we want, going on the dates we would be going on if we were both living in the same area

Or is this just a fantasy and Im over my head here? Its so hard to judge the pace of a long distance relationship

>>17593616

Its a bit creepy and full on, if you havent talked in a while

Try just sending her more platonic friendly "heys" and attempts to catch up first before going straight in for the kill

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>>17593616

You're better off keeping it UNpersonalized. Going in to too much details about how you one-sidedly like some one is kind of pseudo stalkery.

>>17593559
>if you are a dude, and you grope me, i'll fucking kill you. end of story. i know most other MEN that aren't cucks or numales like yourself, would say the same.

ITT: Alpha-internet-tough-chad
>pic related.

>>17593644
It can work but nothing about long distance is easy. You've got to be able to communicate what you're feeling and what's on your mind effectively or you'll not stand a chance. So yeah, talk to her about it. Not gonna tell you how or what to say; that's on you. Will say however that what you're wanting and wondering about is in no way unreasonable. Good luck man, hope things work out for you two.

>t. counting down the days 'til his flight lands

>>17593649
Hey he's spot on about the feminism bit, gotta at least give him that much.

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I have been seeing this a lot, around campus. why do girls do this? I am not complaining! but, it is weird, seeing someone wearing something so blatantly sexual around a college campus.

do girls not know their shorts have ridden up? do they not care? are they intentionally flaunting their butts? or is this just some kind of style, like the way swimsuits never cover butts.

I am a lot older than most college students, so this is totally new to me

>>17593608
watch some teen romance movies. that thing where the two get really close together and start looking at each other nervously? its just like that in real life. if she is staring at you, but keeps acting nervous and smiling, its because she is considering kissing you, but wonders if she should. another clue is if she starts staring at your mouth.

and don't worry if she declines, or steps back. as long as she seriously looks uncomfortable, it might just be nervousness. let her have her space, DON'T CHASE HER, and come back to it later. she might be ready, a second time.

>start texting girl
>say some sexual things
>she goes along with it
>find out she has a boyfriend
>it's a guy I kind of know
>feel like a cunt because they've been dating for a while

>>17593587
if I offer to pay, that means I am paying. now, don't go berserk, but go ahead and enjoy yourself. and, really, what you order and how you eat it tells a lot about you, so I want to know how you react. be yourself.

wait... be a sweeter, sexier version of yourself. be you, but with cute shoes and perfume

>>17593698
They're intentionally being slutty because it's acceptable now.

>>17593156
don't be so available. I have a suspicion that female friendships are inherently terrible, so there is always this leftover need for someone to just talk to. sometimes a girl won't want to date a guy, but will keep him around like a potted plant to just talk to.

what you need to do is fabricate a little scarcity. if you are always available, then they might not value your time. try finding things to do, away from the girls. don't sit on the phone for hours, listening to her babble.

also, take control of things. ask for to go places with her. take the tv remote. bring up conversation topics you want to talk about. don't be so passive. worry less about being a jerk.

don't actively be a jerk. but don't also worry about being a jerk. most girls don't actually like to date assholes. they do prefer interesting guys over boring potted plants, though

>>17593720
I could see that, but the cheeky shorts are usually work with boring shoes (flipflops, usually) and a tee shirt. nothing about the outfit says "hey! look at me! I have a great ass, if someone wants some!"

it really looks like "whoops, my butt popped out of my shorts." except, I figure you can tell when your butt pops out of your shorts...

Turning 30 in a month. Can I still date/marry girls in their early 20s w/o being creepy?

>>17593734
You're kinda proving his point lol

>>17593736
Yes

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So I asked this question last thread, and I can't remember many of the replies and I'm seeing the boy tomorrow. Basically there's a guy in one of my classes, who I want to become friends [or more] with. He's quiet and I'm not sure as to how to start a conversation, or (didn't ask this before) how to hold the conversation, so it isn't awkward

If a girl laughs at my unfunny jokes, or laughs a lot at my only mildly funny jokes, is she just being polite or does she more likely feel affection for me?

>>17593854
Invite her on a date man

Only way to know

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>>17592921
rate me?

i'm goin for long hair, but i don't wanna look gay

>>17593887
>>>/soc//10

>>17593887
are you a man or a woman

>>17593895
MTE

>>17592921
How often do you make fun of strangers with your friends?

Do you talk about guys you rejected?

>>17593902
I never talk about men that have done nothing wrong but try, unless they borderline stalker.

Same goes for with boyfriends, it was your choice to be with them, therefore you should respect them.

Strangers, I usually don't notice or care.

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When you first meet a guy, can you tell if he's sizing you up for penile insertion? I don't want to give off that vibe.

>>17593895
Man lol

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>>17593895
>>17593942
also, how could i look more like a man then? i feel like i just look like a lesbian with short hair when i cut it short, so i'm trying to grow it long

Is taking a girl to see the northern lights too much? How wet will she get? I wanna do something that even if we dont stay together that she can't forget that one amazing thing I did.

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>>17593763
>Basically there's a guy in one of my classes, who I want to become friends [or more] with. He's quiet and I'm not sure as to how to start a conversation, or (didn't ask this before) how to hold the conversation, so it isn't awkward
Just say something. Anything. He'll either pick up the slack, or he's a shitty conversationalist too and there'll be a bunch of awkward silences between each of you struggling to think of things to say.
This isn't a problem, you can even see it as a good way to gauge chemistry. The more you have, the better it feels to just sit there silently next to each other.

And just remember to relax. It's college, not capitol hill. Nobody expects you to be as smooth as a practiced politician. He sure as hell isn't Mr Suave either.

>>17593948
Get as masculine a haircut and style as possible. For something low-maintenance, go with close-cropped back and sides and short on top, see pic related. Very hard to look feminine that way.

If you care enough, you can instead go with something short-to-medium and style it daily with product: leaving it natural with your hair will not get you a manly look, since it hangs down limply. You'll need a pomade or wax (depending on the style you want) to get it into a stiffer, rougher, more masculine shape/texture.

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>>17593972
do it fvm, i wish i could see them. One day.

>>17593972
No that's perfect date material, I'm so jealous.

>>17593736
You can but be aware that they're in a different mindset than you are. They have other priorities (school, partying, going out) and will be less mature. A lot of girls will wonder why you're not with someone your age instead.

Girls

Do you ever piss in the shower?

How do I use tinder just to get hookups? I've got no problem with getting dates on tinder, but how do I use tinder to skip the dating part and just get to sex?

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did i do anything wrong or whatever? the only thing that i cant think of is that I took a day to respond. should i just send another?

>>17594033
Tell them what you want.

>>17594043
and also it was a bit mundane but i actually know this person so i thought it was an ok response

For the girls here, I met this one girl a few more nth so ago, and we seemed to hit it off. After a few convos, I asked her if she wanted to get together for s drink. She said no, that she had boyfriend, but she was looking for a new friend. I said alright, got her number anyways. We had a few text conversations that seemed to go no where. My gut feeling tells me she doesn't have a bf, she is just trying to be nice. Wondering what you think?

>>17594043
>did i do anything wrong or whatever? the only thing that i cant think of is that I took a day to respond. should i just send another?

There's absolutely nothing in that conversation that's offensive. That "conversation" isn't even long enough to be considered a conversation.

If she was interested she would have gotten back to you. She wasn't interested (or got distracted by someone more interesting).

As this male anon >>17593473 that's just how online dating goes.

>>17594014
>>17594002
I'm gonna go for it then.

>>17594100
I know it was a mundane response, is there any way to rebound? she had been trying to get my attention weeks before we matched via other social media

pls indulge me.

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>5:1 male to female ratio for diagnosed autism spectrum disorder
>autist are aprox. 2% of the world population
>tfw you'll never have an aspie gf
>tfw male autist and refuse to date a neurotypical female
>tfw high statistical probability you'll spend the rest of your life alone

I've seen my friend/former-crush/who-the-fuck-am-i-kidding-still-crush for the past 3 fucking days straight for multiple hours one on one based on coincidence.

I don't want to let on I still have a crush since she rejected me months ago, and today she asked me how she looked, and I uh... I stumbled on my words, and I saw her smile and giggle and then I was like, "Fuck uh no you-you look great, you look just like you need to!"

How much did I fuck up and do you think she realizes I still have somewhat of a crush on her even if she's rejected me?

I don't want it to be weird, but I felt like it was.

I've so far been avoiding meeting or messaging her directly, most of our interaction since this semester started has either been from run-ins or her messaging me, it's been months since I ever messaged her first minus the other day.

So basically, what I'm asking here is, does she know I still somewhat like her based on this shit?

For clarification, I'm never going to ask her out again and I'm not expecting her to ever like me again, so I'm not asking this as in a "Maybe I have another chance!" context, I'm asking because I don't want her to start avoiding me because she might find it creepy.

>>17594142
>So basically, what I'm asking here is, does she know I still somewhat like her based on this shit?

I'm a male anon but...

Probably, but given her response, she definitely finds it more flattering and cute than creepy.

Don't mind it.

Move on. Find a new girl.

>>17594139
Fellow aspie here. It gets better anon. Good idea staying away from NT girls, they honestly seem to instinctually hate autist guys.

i went to the police dept yesterday to turn in paperwork/get fingerprinted/photo taken, for my ccw permit. this place was filled with the scum of the earth, with the exception of my fellow aspriring concealed carry weapons wielding compatriots. i wonder what sort of people these people were and what business they had there?

>>17594156
Yeah I'm definitely going to find a new girl

I mean I'm not going to say fuck her entirely and just not be friends, and it's nice to have anyone to hang out with when waiting for breaks in between classes and shit.

Plus she's hot so...

>>17594137

Then pick up your phone, call her, and ask her out on a date.

You know she's interested. Man the fuck up and make a move.

Contacts her though a dating app is the weakest, by far lowest priority, least invested method you have available to you. Doubling down on a dating app would just be weak sauce.

>>17594171
>I mean I'm not going to say fuck her entirely and just not be friends, and it's nice to have anyone to hang out with when waiting for breaks in between classes and shit.

That's about the right mentality to have. I didn't mean to imply you had to ditch her or anything, in fact if anything I would have suggested the opposite (which is exactly what you're doing)

People who tend to shut other people out, tend to do it because they can't deal and would rather run away. And by doing that, all they're really doing is taking away a chance to develop and grow, making them even MORE likely to run away from the emotions in the future in OTHER situations--often where it hurts them even more to do so. It leaves them emotionally stunted, with the emotional development of a 12 year old, and basically leaves them as giant man childs.

Good on you for not sending yourself in to that vicious loop. Sounds like you've got a good head on your shoulders. Keep failing, keep learning, keep growing. That's how you become a man in life, and that's how you live it with no regrets.

Best of luck.

>>17594190
I didn't talk to her in facebook because I thought it was too awkward. I thought tinder provided a graet icebreaker. Does it really look bad when I try to talk to her via tinder?

>>17594195
>I didn't talk to her in facebook because I thought it was too awkward. I thought tinder provided a graet icebreaker. Does it really look bad when I try to talk to her via tinder?

...

Didn't you post about this yesterday or something?

I think I'll try to reword exactly what I told you that time too...
Tindr is an app that is notoriously known for 1 night stands. Yes? This is a fact you know yes?

This girl is interested enough in you that she's tried to contact you across other mediums. This is another fact.

By doing so, it's clear to you she is interested in you, and probably wants to get to know you.

But by ignoring her everywhere else and contacting her SPECIFICALLY through TINDR--the app we already said is known primary for 1 night stands--you are now effectively signalling, "hey I want to fuck you once. Dump you. Then never talk to you again."

Contact her through more normal means -.-.
You have it available to you. Use it. At this point just flat out call her and ask her out.

>>17594202
yeah i posted but i just want some more prespective before i fuck anything up.

thanks. she's literally the only one to make me act this autistic.

>>17594139
I'm in a similar position. For some reason I really attract bipolar women, and I'm not sure why. Seems like a horrible pairing with aspergers, and personal experience seems to agree.

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Guys
if you have seen shameless do guys like lip exist ?

Do guys usually get upset if their gf has a vibrator/dildo?

>>17594033
It's all in how you communicate. Most of us like to get wined-and-dined a little before we fuck (or just chat at a Chik-Fil-A for ten minutes before banging in the back of a car, whatever) like unfortunately it's not usually gonna be as easy as much meeting up and fucking. We like to feel like we aren't sex objects so we go on "dates" and then end up fucking you by the end of the night and convince ourselves that you really liked us because we had good conversation beforehand and that we only fucked because there was chemistry.
So either deal with the dates to get to the fuck, or just tell them straight up on Tinder that you just want to fuck-- just expect the number of positive responses to go down significantly.

>>17594031
Yes almost every time I take a shower.

>>17593972
No that's amazing!!! I would never forget that, definitely go for it.

>>17593932
I mean if he's like looking at my tits all night or whatever yeah I assume it but if he's making conversation, smiling and being sweet then I'm usually pretty naive to any sexual thoughts he may be having haha.

>>17593902
I try my hardest not to "make fun" of anyone but occasionally I'll mention a situation to a friend of a guy I turned down simply because I feel bad or whatever. It's not like "haha look how pathetic this guy is wow lol" it's usually like "aww this guy was great because ___ but I had to say no because ___ :("


>>17593854
I definitely get a little giddy and laugh a little too much at silly things when I'm into a guy. I say go for it.

>>17593736
Of course :) I'm 20 now and my last bf was 32. Just keep in mind that there's nearly a decade of very important development between you so don't expect them to be on your level!

>>17593710
That isn't your fault at all, you didn't know going into it, and she shouldn't be saying that shit if she's taken. Don't feel bad. If anything, tell her boyfriend the situation.

>>17593608
She will look at your lips a lot, make eye contact, face you, try to be close to you. Just lean in and kiss. First one should always be closed-mouth, just lips on lips. Linger there, and if she kisses back, then you can move into the more intense stuff. But don't go at her with your mouth open, that shit drives me nuts.

>>17593587
It depends! If he's like a broke college kid then I'll be pretty moderate about it, but if he's older and clearly more well-off, I might get something a dollar or two higher than I usually would. But I never go beyond what I would be willing to spend myself because I don't like to assume that he's paying-- and I'm more than happy to pay, and will always offer to-- but if he does, I try to keep it on the less expensive side, yeah.

>>17593310
I personally don't believe in "casual dating". Hookups, yes, if it's explicitly agreed upon, but if I'm dating you, then you can believe that I like you enough to consider marriage. To me, the whole point of dating is to find the person you wanna spend the rest of your life with. But that doesn't mean I'm going to settle for someone who isn't right for me-- so if it takes until my late 20s to find that person, then I will wait.

>>17592960
READING. That's the biggest one. A guy who reads is infinitely more attractive. Outdoorsy stuff like biking or hiking is also nice. Fine arts hobbies like music, art, theater, or literature are attractive as well.

Unattractive hobbies would be superficial stuff like "competitive vaping" or if he lists "smoking weed" as a hobby. Like any hobby is attractive if you're intelligent and passionate about it but some hobbies just come off as dumb.

>>17594280
Depends.

>>17594274
I hope so. Watching Shameless right now, and he's a damn dreamboat.

>>17592998
The story seemed Ike it was about your friend so why did you mention yourself? Maybe you're being hacked buddy. Happened on some different service before.

Women, under what circumstances would you give a guy you just met a few days ago a blowjob.
Like what would he need to do.
>be rich
>be 6'7
>have a huge penis you are somehow aware of
>ask nicely
etc. Like what are some combinations of things hed need to do/have going for him. Minimum requirements please. Its going to be near impossible to live up to those as it is.

Girls: what would be some possible reasons a girl would be kinda flakey sometimes? Sometimes she'll text me first and we'll have a great conversation, and we've gone out to the beach together before and she'll sometimes send me selfies of her and I tell her how great she looks, but other times she'll either not reply to me, or if I invite her to something shell say she is going and then not go, or just stop replying mid-convo. Sometimes well talk every day for a few weeks straight and then she'll ignore me for a month. This has been going on for nearly a year. I'm getting real confused by these signals.

>>17594280
>Do guys usually get upset if their gf has a vibrator/dildo?
>usually

No fucking idea. I can tell you I give absolutely zero fucks about my girlfriend having a dildo. Hell, I've helped her use it.

My gut tells me the majority of people who DO care, it's probably because they're insecure as fuck and think they're being compared to dildos and they can't pleasure their partner.

But I'm completely and totally speculating there and could be full of shit. *shrug*

>>17594280
Yes. Its the same things as if your bf used a fleshlight. Kinda disgustingly desperate desu.

>>17594350
I guess it's important when sex-toys are introduced.

when the relationship has some difficulties in other areas, bringing in sex-toys will just introduce more tension.

but when everything's fine and a toy is brought in for experimentation or just trying it out, I say bring it on.

>>17594335
>6'7
Too intimidating for a lot of girls. Besides if you're rich just buy a hooker.

Theres this person I've met through friend of friend. She mentions about her bf from every encounter from day 1. I understood and respect that so I didn't make a move. Recently shes becoming more touchy and flirty with me. She still mentions about her bf.
What is she thinking?

ask her.

plus if she really got a bf (serious relationship stuff) and is still going around approaching other guys, is that the kind of woman you want to be with?

>>17593608
90% you 10% her
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSpJQlBJCzA

>>17593948
>how could i look more like a man then?
lose bodyfat/gain muscle
shorter haircut
i'd say beard but you cant grow it
stop being a teeneager

Girls, why are you sometimes a bit conservative in bed?
The other night I spent all night with a girl (first date) kissing and cuddling, and she was really affectionate. I fingered her loads and even licked her out a bit. But all i got was a weak ass handjob, and wasn't even close to cumming.

I'm not bitter or anything i'm just wondering what this means. Is it because you don't want to appear slutty or you want to take your time with things or what?

>>17594447
Its just a point to give an idea for the types of answers I was looking for. This isnt about getting a blowjob. Its about what it would take for a woman to do it under the described circumstances.

>>17592921
>females, I asked a female coleige about another female if she was available. She says she seeing some one.

Should I believe her?

>>17594541
Ps I'm a terrible speller so forgive the shit spelling

>>17594541
Are those two females friends. If yes then you should believe her. Even if she isnt she might have told her or they might have already mentioned that you were into her and crossed you off the list of potential suitors.

>>17594549
Ah thanks

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>>17593644
>, which has led to her being single for a fair while now, because she finds it hard to trust
Forget about it. Don't be the nice guy faggot, this chick has baggage.

>>17594280
Anybody who says yes is a virgin

Nobody cares

>>17594573
>Nobody cares
Blatantly false.

>>17594575
Unless what that other anon said, you're extremely insecure

>>17594540
I guess it depends on the girl. Though i'm quite sure the younger ones may fall for it quite easily.

>>17594335
Autism

>>17594588
Also blatantly false. Im >>17594353
Maybe where you are from fleshlights are normal but definitely not where I live.

>>17594623
What is
>it
exactly.

>>17594625
Isnt it assumed that people with autism cant consent to sex.

>>17594532
whether or not ur a girl u have a funny way of writing, thanks for the help

>>17594632
Rape

>>17594335
Girls dont just give blowjobs to people they just meet unless alcohol is involved

>>17594646
Youd be surprised. I just dont know what the isolated variables to it.

>>17594652
It's alcohol

>>17594659
Nah Ive heard of non alcoholic stories before

>>17594335
Be sexually attracted to him and be okay with casual sex.

Personally, I'm not fine with casual sex so even if you were absolutely perfect, I wouldn't suck your dick.

>>17594675
Are you 16?

>>17594575
>Nobody worth the oxygen they consume cares

>>17594695
Didnt hear any sex stories until I was in college

>>17594702
Are you a virgin?

>>17594701
>anyone who disagrees isnt worth anything
Im sure hitler said the same thing

>>17594500

>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.

>>17594703
Why would hearing sex stories have any bearing on being a virgin. The answers no, but the furthest Ive ever gotten to a girl I recently met if feeling up her boobs. It takes a while for them to ever even reach in your pants. I dont understand how some guys get the swift blowjobs though. So Im asking what exactly is that factor that they have that makes those girl do it.

>>17594710
Well, did you ask them? I think I understand the problem

Is the "Honesty is the best policy" true?

Should I divulge my dull hobbies, offbeat music and social views day 1 so the other party know what your deal is, or should you inhale the overpriced beer, ignore the thumpa-thumpa and pretend you give a fuck about trivial shit?

>>17594678
Im not asking about what she needs to do, Im asking about what the guy needs to do.

>>17594714
Ask the guys what the girls saw in them?

>>17594715
Its all about the presentation. If you are boring about your boring hobbies then everyone will think you are boring. If you are passionate about your hobbies people will take interest. People care more about how you feel about something than how they feel about it .

>>17594720
No. Did you ask to get bj instead of waiting

>>17594717
And I am saying that there's nothing he can do to be sure that every girl wants to give him head after the first date.
She needs to be sexually attracted to him (and there's no universal rule about it) and she needs to be fine with casual sex (and morals are different for every person).

>>17594722
What if you are emotionally stunted, do no feel strongly about much of anything and your hunt for love is a (as close to desperate as possible) attempt to feel anything?

>>17594715

Yes it is best policy because that will make stand out and when you
are not acting and overthinking you are more comfortable and that
will make you look very confident.

>>17594730
>And I am saying that there's nothing he can do to be sure that every girl wants to give him head after the first date.
Thats not what I asked either. I asked what would he have to do for the women in this thread to do it. Not some equation sheet. Please read.

>>17594536
Depends.

>>17594627
Define normal.

>>17594736
then you're wasting everybody's time, including your own.

>>17594736
Dude wtf. Heres a hint for women. Women love guys who are passionate about something. You ever wonder why there are so many gold diggers. They flock to successful men. Go out and find something you love and theres a following of women who will be all over you.

>>17594742
When people dont immediately look at you like trash

>>17594744
Some just don't have passion or drive.

>>17594749
They also dont have a gf. You chose your fate.

>>17594752
You don't choose to have passion.

You can fake it I guess.

I asked a girl to lunch and she asked "just us or with friends?" I told her just us.

Was that her way of subtley asking if it was a date.

>>17594756
You definitely do. Its a direct result of you wasting your life away. You chose to not go out, join a community and get good at something.

>>17594759
yes

>>17594759

Looks like it

>>17594759
Yeah.

>>17594748
Am I supposed to guess to which one of those three lines you replied?

Are all girls bisexual?

accidentally pooped in a girl's mouth
What do I do?

>>17594771
Not him but I assume its "define normal"

Question for girls or gays

Guy here. There's this chick in my class at uni.
She has short dark hair, with one side of her head extra short for that asymmetrical look.
Her wallpaper on her laptop is two male lions cuddling.

She's eager to be with me at uni but never makes a move. Should I just realize she's gay?

>>17594760
WelI I suppose I'm skilled at stacking shelves, taking inventory, sorting components and doing spreadsheets, and it's a good feeling when it comes together.

Where do i go to pick up women with my skills at efficiently completing mundane taskes?

>>17594780
Why don't you just ask her out?

>>17594775
No. The idea of having sex with a girl really grosses me out.

>>17594791
i dont know
Maybe I'm hesitant because we're stuck together for the next year at uni.

>>17594776
Apoolagize

Do girls like guys who follow sports?

>>17594802
YES. Please.
Mostly because I do too, so it's something cool we can do together.
And sexy time during breaks is practical.

Unless he likes cycling. Then he can fuck off.

How do i stop sending mixed signals subconsciously? I love being flirty and touchy guy without having a plan to have sex with girls but when i decide to use it consciously - i cant muster up my charm and i become frustrated with myself plus i feel like im forcing too much.

>>17594807
I follow baseball basketball and hockey and in my personal experience I found that girls do take interest in me when I say I'm into sports, I wasn't sure if that has anything to do with it tho

>>17594815
It's one of those manly-man-things that can be somewhat sexy, I think.
To me it's mostly because I like watching sports, so it's really cool if my bf does too and I don't need to get the "oh it's so pointless to watch sports on tv, let's read Nietzsche" speech by some hipstery dude.

>>17594802
I personally don't follow anu sports in the slightest; neither playing nor watching. However, if a guy I was interested in wanted to go to a hockey game or something I would. Still a good date opportunity and I would want to support what he's passionate about. Would try and follow along as well I could but there's no promises with that.

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>>17594801

Mentioned further up in this thread that I've got a date this weekend. Should I send her a text that morning to make sure it's still happening, or would that sound desperate/needy/whatever?

Hello girls, how long do you make a guy wait? (Religion is not in the picture) I am with my gf for 2 years and 3 months (we move in together for a year), I am 29 and she's 21, she's a virgin and I am not, she says she's not ready for sex even though she's not religious, is it too much to ask or I am just being strung along?

>>17594869
Personally I waited for a little under a year with the guy I lost my virginity with, and 7 months with my current boyfriend.
Have you ever had a serious talk about it? Why doesn't she want to have sex? Do you do anything together?
You cannot exactly ASK for sex, but, yeah - you should at least know why you're waiting and how long will it be.

Ladies
How often do you worry about getting pregnant if you're having sex?
I know a girl who is so scared of getting pregnant, which I can understand

>>17594869
>2 years
Cut her loose

>>17594883
I used to worry a lot. I would check that the condom wasn't broken after sex, and have pregnancy tests whenever my period was late even if I didn't have sex that month.
It was unbearable, so I went on IUD.
99.99% effective. I still do a pregnancy test if I miss a period, but it's not something I worry about all that much anymore.

>>17594883
Its quite common for her to be scared of pregnancy especially if her family is religious.

>>17594888
My fwb used to be like this, and got the IUD too, she doesn't seem to be bothered anymore though
although twice we've had to use plan B because the condom broke

>>17594873
Every time that I try to talk seriously about it, she only reply me with "I just don't feel ready, I am sorry." She never gave me any explanation or how long it will be, and I think one time she asks me "What would you say if I say I want to wait till marriage?" I am thinking there is no religion involved so she's only testing me. I do things with her and her family and I do things for her.

>>17594822
>>17594824
I get a similar reaction when I tell a girl i like fishing
Girls like when a guy is passionate about something or because its "manly"?

>>17594920
You should at least have a serious talk about this and know what's going on.
It's insane that you haven't fucked for 2 years and never discussed about it.
I am not religious but I cared about virginity back then and I still care about sex now. It matters to me to share it just with someone I care about.

>>17594926
Both, I guess. I like watching my boyfriend shaving his beard, or doing those things that my grandpa did like cleaning his dress shoes or cleaning the car. I find it kind of endearing and calming.
I cannot explain you WHY, but it is a thing for me,

>>17594926
For me it's not about being manly, it's just that if i'm with someone I care about, I want to have interest their hobbies and experience things I'm not normally used to.

>>17593932
What, you mean like holding a measuring tape to my crotch and saying "Yes, this'll fit great"?

>>17594280
I'd be surprised and slightly disappointed if she didn't have any toys.

>>17594888
Is it more that you're comfortable with the idea of children?
>>17594891
I know, but this girl is super scared of it, like she has nightmares about it even

>>17595031
>Is it more that you're comfortable with the idea of children?
I started having sex when I was 16. I'm now 23.
I still do not want to have kids soon, but of course having a child at 16 would have ruined my life, now it would just make things more complicated - I have a house, a degree, some savings, a job.
I am using a more efficient way to avoid pregnancy and I am in a better position if it actually happened. I guess that calms my paranoia a bit.

Guys

Do you expect a girl to shave her pubic hair?

>>17595057
Absolutely.

>>17595057
Do I expect it is going to be shaved with a girl i first hook up with? Yeah. Do I necessarily like shaved pubes? Then no.
All girls here in Canada seem to shave but I hooked up with an English girl on the weekend and she had a killer bush, I even told her it was top tier

>>17595057
I dont expect it
But I REALLY hope for it

>>17595057
Same as >>17595100
It would be like a happy surprise, personally because I love to go down for her.
Lets face that is something you would see most in porn than in real life

Do girls all secretly have dicks or what?

>>17595124
Yes. It's called 'clitoris'

>>17595057
>>17595072
I also expect it but don't necessarily like it. I'm in Canada also and all the chicks I've been with have been shaved, it's nice but I wouldn't mind a kept bush that was shaved below for eating purposes. Actually, that would be hot.

With that said, I wouldn't mind if it was just trimmed or something. I don't shave my pubes, I'm hairy as fuck so it would look weird. I mostly just keep them trim and go the lowest I possibly can on the balls/shaft.

Question right back for girls: What kind of expectations do you have for a guy's public hair?

>>17595057
>Do you expect a girl to shave her pubic hair?

I think this might be a generational thing...

I'm in my late 20's... Trimmed all the way.

>>17594849
>Mentioned further up in this thread that I've got a date this weekend. Should I send her a text that morning to make sure it's still happening, or would that sound desperate/needy/whatever?

Nah dude, it's just kind of common courtesy, "Hey just confirming we're still on for X o'click right? See you in a bit"

>>17594715
>Is the "Honesty is the best policy" true?
There's a different between being honest, and just umpromptedly blurting out random shit with no context.

If I randomly told you I once got so black out drunk, I woke up in a bathroom, and just laughed because I had no idea how I got there.

You're instantly going to assume I'm a degenerate alcoholic who drinks every day of his life.

But if we're telling stories about drinking and I give you the context: I don't drink except socially when I'm with my friends. That particular night, I was drinking on an empty stomach, after a 14 hour workday to celebrate my busy season being official over, and it was the first time in at least a couple of months (because work). I'd NEVER blacked out, browned out, or did anything remotely close before.

The last thing I remember was being in the parking lot, heading towards my car, and telling my friends I'd call an uber after a nap. I woke up in the bathroom (Didn't puke, I guess I just really needed to go), found they'd left me some tacos in my car, ate a bit, called an uber, Felt perfectly fine.

Context changes things quite a bit.

Present YOUR best self.

It's the same way you don't roll up to a date in the ripped jeans, tshirts with a hole it it, and unhsaved, with uncombed hair. Yeah, maybe that's how you normally roll around the house on weekends, but it also makes you look lazy as fuck and like you're not even bothering to do them the courtesy of putting in half a fucking ounce of effort

>>17595057
You fucking better.

>>17594781
You invested your skill points into the wrong tree. You gotta just grind out a new tree.

>>17595339
If I really like a man then it's going to take a lot to seriously turn me off, but I despise the look of a shaved crotch. It looks childish, stunted and really "naked" to me in a bad way. Trimmed is better but still not great. Personal preference is to just not touch it at all.

For the record though I'm a Eurofag and I feel like we're a lot more relaxed about bodies being hairy. I'd never shave my pubes off for someone (on the regular, that is) and that's a fairly common stance among my friends (all early to mid twenties).

>>17595339
>What kind of expectations do you have for a guy's public hair?
Hairy, but under control.
Don't have it so long that I can't give you head without ending up chocking on your hair.
Don't shave or trim it too short.

I keep myself shaved (I actually did laser) because it's more practical, but really on guys it looks weird.

To the anon yesterday who gave me advice regarding approaching someone that is reading a book, did not see her again but i passed another girl waiting at a bus stop with her dog, i remembered what you said about a girl's mood playing part's wether she will respong positive or not and decided to say hi while passing by regardless of the response, she very shyly nodded back, i feel so proud of myself now, thanks again, was going to talk to her opening about the dog but not sure if it was a good idea to speak to her is she was so shy.

Girls,
Why do you keep staring at your phone when you're on a date? Its so rude towards other people.

>>17595469
>Why do you keep staring at your phone when you're on a date? Its so rude towards other people.
Because you're boring.

Girls:
How seriously should i take content a girls shares on social media?
Girls who's interested in me (and i in her) shares stuff like: "take my hand, take my whole life too", "you go your way, i'll go your way too"and loads of pictures of couples hugging or laying in bed together.
We've also talked about those same subjects but haven't got serious about them.
Is she just expressing her desires or are those hints to me?

>>17595476
Alright, one look and im going away from you.

>>17595463
Happen to see this and great job man!!! I'm proud of you as well.

Now remember what I said, there are usually more subtle signs/openings that people give each other. Dogs are amazing ice breakers, by the way. But okay take the situation of today - if you don't dare to straight up ask her about the dog or anything, sit down next to her and catch the attention of the dog. For some eye contact and a smile will do, otherwise you can whistle something at the dog or click your tongue as a greeting. Typically dog will come up to you now and you can pet him.
Now pay attention to the girl. Is she making an effort to avoid eye contact, does her body language keep you at distance (head turned away, crossed legs not pointing to you), does she completely ignore that you are bonding with her dog etc? She is not interested - OR, as I said, sick, tired, painfully shy or downright anxious, whatever. You can't know that and it's not your problem, all you need to know is that she's not up for talking. Just give the dog some love and get back to what you were doing.
If she starts cooing at the dog ("look at that, you're in luck!"), smiling at you, looking at you, or even intently smiling at and looking at the dog, she's up for talking. Basically she either engages with what's going on with you, or she disengages.

You want to practice these things a lot for two reasons. The first is that the more you do this, the more sensitive you become towards the little cues that people do or do not want to talk. The second is more important to me. Once you become confident with this sort of interaction - small talk, fleeting banter or even just eye contact with flirty smiles with strangers, little gestures of friendliness - you become more confident that you are in tune with what's normal and what's socially acceptable and what not. More aware of how you come across and whether you do anything out of the ordinary.
>to be cont'd

>>17595491
The result is that once it eventually happens that someone is an asshole to you for no reason, it doesn't actually hit you that hard because you are fully aware that they are being an asshole for no reason.

All the time I see shit like
>but what if I smile at that girls and she rolls her eyes and says "look away, creep"??
on here and the thing is, that's not the shit to be afraid of. What's actually painful is seeing that someone pities you or something. What is not painful (for YOU) is someone suddenly being a rabid cunt out of nowhere. These are things that make perfect sense if you are normally confident in social interaction (including with people you don't know), but if you rarely put yourself out there (and I don't just mean romantically/sexually) every interaction gets a huge importance and perceived significance that it doesn't actually deserve. So protect yourself by becoming comfortable with reaching out to strangers in small ways, and a lot of doom scenarios won't seem that daunting anymore. Keep up the good work!

>>17595463
>>17595506
And realized I forgot to address that but no, feel good that you greeted her. It will actually help her lose some of her nerves. If all the good guys abstain from making her potentially uncomfortable by saying hi or smiling, the only guys reaching out to her are the ones who don't give two shits about her discomfort.

>>17595491
>>17595506
>>17595514

Will pass that bus stop around the same time next week if i have the time, thanks again for all the advice.

>>17595554
You're quite welcome!

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I've met a girl at college who I've fallen madly in love. I'm friends with a lot of her friends although I don't talk to her much out of a strange awkwardness between us (I don't know if this is caused by me being too nervous around her or because she's being too shy or both). Would it be creepy to text her despite not being that close to her yet? Or should I attempt to make a better impression in real life first?

>>17595630
Real life first.

I'm going to meet a girl next weekend. She contacted me over a classifieds page. My ad was for a friend to go out and have sex.
The closer our date, it feels more like a regular date, and less a meet up with no strings attached. I'm not even sure if bringing up the sex part will be proper anymore. What to do?

>>17595630
source on the pic?

>>17595729
Venezuela, 1962.

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>>17595729
The year was 1962, such a brutal yet amazing event was witnessed: a dying, wounded soldier seeks the help of a sacred man, a priest. Such is the horror of war, and sometimes we all need divine solace.

>>17595737
>>17595740
thanks men, really touching

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>>17595748
Have another. This time from Northern Ireland, 1988. A Catholic Irish priest gives the last rites to a British soldier who was just lynched by the IRA for driving into a Republican funeral.

>>17593981
Thank you for the advice about him

>>17595400
This
Pubes are nice

>>17595469
>>17595476
things like this make me think "fucking millennials" and i'm only 21

>>17595857
I am 25. I never looked at my phone during a date, not even when I'm at home eating pizza with my boyfriend.
But if I look at my phone it's because I'm so bored that I can't even bring myself to be polite.

>getting close to crush
>have to get braces at 18 now since i was a cuck and didn't want to when i was 16
>now she'll probably not like me anymore
unlucky and stupid

What looks better to a girl having your own car or your own place?

Actually I don't fucking want a car so I'm not buying one

>>17595989
Can people stop using cuck in ways that make no fucking sense? Fucking white people man

>>17595989
because of braces?
then you had no chance anyway.

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Guys:
How can I tell if a dude (non-verbally) is interested in me? I can never tell. And how the fuck do I know when someone is flirting with me?

>>17596006
t. a white person

>>17596022
You know that moment where you think "No, they can't possibly be flirting with me because I'm too ugly/fat/boring? They must be mocking me!"?

That's them flirting with you.

>>17595469
I'm guilty of doing this. Honestly I'm just used to checking up on my apps and stuff during the day, it doesn't really have to do with whether you're boring or not. I don't mind if you ask me to put it away for a while.

>>17596022
Guys who spend a lot of time with you exclusively are generally interested in more than being freindly, but they do not always say so.

>>17596044
Except when there is a bunch of girls/guys standing/sitting behind them laughting.

Then they're mocking you for real.

Used to happen to me in school.
Im a dude.

>>17596057
Protip: People laugh to embarrass and mock the person that's flirting, not the person being flirted with.

How many times have you heard the classic sing-song "X looooovvvvvvvessssss Y"?

i've been having feelings for a friend of mine the past few weeks

what's the least awkward way to act on them

and what's the best way to ensure we can still be friends if she doesn't feel the same way

>>17596061
I know this girl wasn't serious though.
In fact, not a single normal weight girl has ever showed serious interest in me.

You can tell the difference, it's not rocket science.

>>17596044
I honestly don't know because I seriously can't tell. Also, what if he's shy/quiet?

Both genders: How do I get more confidence? I used to be very confident when I was in highschool. Then my best bud killed himself, and my gf of 4 years left me, and I started browsing 4chan. Now I can't help but feel like shit because i'm only 5'8, hardly have facial hair and i'm skinny. Now I know I can change the skinny part. I'm just hoping I can get some reassurance that being 5'8 and not having facial hair is something I can overcome.

>>17596067
You've got a serious persecution complex. Get over yourself.

>>17596084
> I'm just hoping I can get some reassurance that being 5'8 and not having facial hair is something I can overcome
Stop doing this shit. You're here asking for validation, not advice. You want more confidence? Stop caring so much about the validation of others.

>>17596088
>you're here asking for validation
That's literally what this board is.

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>>17596084
Get brain surgery, it's what drastically improved my confidence 2bh

What's a good alternative to asking a girl to have coffee some time, aside from lunch?
(coffee is gross af desu)

>>17596088
>You've got a serious persecution complex.
Have you ever been bullied in school?

If you have, then you should know why i feel this way.

>>17596092
Stop confusing validating with advice, faggot.

>>17596084
Check this thread out, I think it's a better place to ask this >>17595030

>>17596088
can we really stop seeking validation though? Isn't that what we sign up for when being part of a complex social structure?

Didn't get a reply in the last thread, so here it is again:

>Okay, this a very basic one:

>How important is it to confess you're crushing on your crush, even if the odds are clearly not in your favour?

>I've developed feelings for this girl, and she seems to enjoy my company well enough, but apart from her generally open attitude towards me I don't think she sees me as potential boyfriend material.

>I still cannot rest easily. Whenever she writes me, my day gets simultaneously better and worse because I am so excited she thought about me and at the same time I scold myself because I may be reading too much into it and have my hopes up for nothing. The thought of her is always lurking in the back of my head and some things that remind me of her or the fact we may not be an item cut extremely deep and hurt.

>So should I be open, in the hope that just saying the words and officially be shut down may enable the healing or am I just bound to have that knive unnecessarily twisting and turning in the wound?

>>17596096
A walk in the park or by the water front
I'm from Toronto and I've taken girls down to the lake to watch planes take off and land on the island airport
Gets bitches wet

>>17596097
I have but then I got over because I'm not a whiny faggot.

>>17596106
well you seem to be projecting your frustration pretty hard.

>>17596103
>can we really stop seeking validation though?
Yes.

>>17595469
I don't. Maybe this is a regional thing (European here) but I only have friends who never or by rare exception look at they're phone when we're talking or going somewhere together. I still never owned a smartphone because I spend too much time online as it is and have zero desire to have that distraction around 24/7.

>>17596108
>Ask for advice
>Get told something that isn't instantly validating
>Start firing out fallacies and crying
Yeah, thanks for proving my point, faggot.

>>17596109
So maslows hierarchy of needs is completely irrelevant?

>>17596104
I think you should do it, while she's single. It's up to you though, do what you think is right

>>17596112
>they're
Jesus. Too high to bother with shameful editing.

>>17596114
>getting this defensive
You seem to be worse off than me.

>>17596119
Yes. Stop basing your life off of retarded shit you learned in Psych 101.

>>17596124
>continuing to prove my point
Your persecution complex must be crippling. Lord knows your self-awareness is non-existent.

>>17596125
>stop basing your life off of scientifically approved and universally accepted concepts.

Okay I think i'll give my life to christ as well.

>>17596130
The irony is, you're literally proving my point every reply.

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>>17596132
>maslows hierarchy of needs
>scientifically approved and universally accepted concept
No wonder you lack confidence. Look at you. You're a fucking embarrassment.

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>>17596138

>>17596134
>NO U
Kek.

Don't worry lad. I get it. You got bullied. You know your life is worth nothing. You know you're nothing. But on the internet, boy oh boy, you're practically a god. I mean, you can keep posting until the other person gets bored and leaves, and that makes you a WINNER, right buddy? You can finally feel that dopamine rush that comes from "Maybe I'm NOT a piece of unloved shit with nothing going for him".

But, in the end, you are.


>inb4 NO U again in the form of "UR PROJECTING BRO!"

PS. That's not what irony means.

>>17596142
>GB2REDDIT!
>MY SAFE SPACE IS COMPROMISED!
>I CAME HERE TO BE VALIDATED AND YOU'RE NOT DOING THAT! WAAAAAAH!
Yeah lad, I'm the one being a bitch. Kek.

>>17596145
>Don't worry lad. I get it. You got bullied. You know your life is worth nothing. You know you're nothing. But on the internet, boy oh boy, you're practically a god. I mean, you can keep posting until the other person gets bored and leaves, and that makes you a WINNER, right buddy? You can finally feel that dopamine rush that comes from "Maybe I'm NOT a piece of unloved shit with nothing going for him".
>But, in the end, you are.

Coming from personal experience. You should probably take a step back and look at yourself

>>17596022
I think I should be more specific: How can I tell if a guy who I see a lot, but only know as an aquantaince, is interested in me? Like body language

>>17596153
Hey look, it's exactly the "UR PROJECTING BRO!" response that I predicted. It's almost like your pathetic worm of a life is predictable in every way because you are the same 80% of this site. I bet you've frequented /r9k/, haven't you buddy?

>>17596158
Dude, you're arguing with a faggot
I stopped posting here >>17596097

From girl, for other girls:

What is the proper way to tell someone flirting with you to stop or go away? It is annoying when people try to make friends with you just to flirt.

And what would you do if it was a complete stranger?

>>17596104
by not "confessing". that's elementary-school-tier.

>>17596120
The single part is pretty ambiguous, as far as I'm aware.

>>17596204
So... You're saying I should just suck it up and leave well enough alone? Or are you just comparing me to a child because I used a word that you don't like?

>>17596224
i think his point is just ask her out, don't overwhelm her with all your feelings for her at once

i'm in a similar situation and i'm worried that i'm going to hurt the friendship by asking her out on one date, there's no way i'd go into a big thing about how i have feelings for her and whatever

>>17596154
Advice? Anyone?

>>17596001
>I don't fucking want a car so I'm not buying one
Same here, man. Got a nice apartment right next to campus so i don't need a car.
Never like cars. I'll get one when i have to, but not before.

>>17596022 >>17596154
It's pretty obvious for dudes, unlike girls we don't go to great lengths to hide it.
>talks to you much longer than he has to, loses track of time
>tries hard to keep the conversation going
>more eye contact than necessary
>more smiling than usual
>sitting there grinning like a dumbass for no reason
>seems happy to see you every time
>sitting too close, touching you unnecessarily, etc
Also this >>17596044.

>>17596084
No facial hair is not a problem. Being clean-shaven is never strange or wrong unless you're a biker or some shit.
About the height, I'm 5'7". My dad's 5'3", and if he couldn't get married to a beautiful woman I wouldn't even be here.

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>>17596238

There is none. What you need to do with dudes is ask them to hang out sometime and ask/give them your number. That way he knows it is on
and if he likes you will follow trough.

>>17596252
This

>>17596132 >>17596142 >>17596145 >>17596158
This is a thread for advice, not random pissing matches.
Testosterone is a hell of a drug, but you guys seriously need to grow up.
This isn't 4th grade.

>>17596252
This too.

>>17596259
>Jumping into an argument that ended almost an hour ago to tell people to stop the argument and slip a little "I'm so superior and mature" comment in
What the fuck are you doing, you absolute wally?

>>17596252

Sounds like a good idea, and do you have any advice on trying to become friends first? (To like ease into it, and see if we get along) I'm considering either one.

>>17596266
>become friends
Talk to him. He's already an acquaintance. Just talk to him and see how you get along.

>>17596229
I was thinking about simply saying "Hey, I got a bit of a crush on you. Felt you should know." because I'll meet her this saturday at a local concert.

If that's "overwhelming" then I'm pretty sure you're telling me to just shut up about it.

I've known her for about a year now and I think we're on friendly terms. She's told me some serious shit going on in her life and whenever we write, she's very communicative.

As I said, her single-status is very ambiguous. I'll definitely check that before I'll say anything, but honestly I feel if I don't do something that upsets the status-quo I'll just be stuck in a frustrating loop.

>>17596280
Gonna have to think of something to talk about then. I tried talking to him once and it was really short, since he talks to like no one in that class.

>>17596285
Anything at all you have in common. As little as getting the same train of having the same class or having a test or some shit. Anything at all to get the ball rolling and you'll be grand.

>>17596291
Ok, thank you!

>>17596293
Find something you both mutually dislike to talk about
That's always fun

>hook up with friend
>there for hours and hours
>she's so happy about it and says we need to atleast be FWB
>even makes a point about writing how she's feeling down so she remembers how much fun it was
>cut to two weeks later we haven't met again
>we texted but nothing out of the normal then all of a sudden
>she says sex makes her too depressed and we can't hook up like she said

How can I convince her to go back to how she felt? I feel like I have a right to be mad cause she got my hopes up and didn't even give it a chance. She's known I like her for almost two years.

Everyone,

I guess you could say that I am kind of a spineless man. More than spineless, I like pleasing my partner a lot and making them happy, maybe to a fault.

But apparently not even a single person likes this. Strong girls will stomp all over me and weaker ones won't respect me or think like I can protect them.

Thoughts? Why is being stronger than that so valued?

>>17596341
You're a faggot and girls like being used for sex and pleasing the guy they're with. What you're describing sounds awkward and boring as fuck

What do when you suck at everything you spend time on?

> be 24 years old male
> master student but only medicore grades
> spend time on internet/4chan but do not know anything about it
> play computer games since 10 years old, but noob at every one
> tries to get friends, no friends (at least not bullied anymore)
> no gf
> tries to become sportish, but still overweight (at least not obese anymore)
> tries to fight depression, still kinda depressed (would not mind to die)

>>17596465
Get a hobby you can't fail at

>>17596473
like what, watching paint dry!?

>>17596435
Why though? I still cannot wrap my head around it, and given the evolutionary explanation I'll just feel unfit as shit.

>>17596473
the only thing I would not fail at is binch eating crap into me and get fat again...

>>17596341
That sounds sweet, but like, I don't want to be worshipped I want to be loved. If you're just out to please someone that's not very engaging and it isn't much of a relationship.

Guys/Girls

I'm pretty attractive guy and I know that more than a handful of girls have had a crush on me. I'm pretty confident and I flirt physically with a number of attractive women in my life. I've shed my adolescent shyness and have become more confident due to the female attention I get. How come I'm still single? If I'm as desirable as people say I am why haven't I found the SO I've been hoping for ever since. I love kids and want my own but have yet to meet the mother of my children. When I was younger I thought I'd have a family by now. What am I doing wrong?

>>17596539
You haven't met the right person. A lot of girls just like flirting for the attention

>>17596508
Honestly I look for very little. I just want someone who doesn't judge me, is loyal, and loves me. I'd be happy like that.

But somehow I cannot even have this. I'm asked to be passionate but passion isn't a big thing for me; at most I get super excited about things and that's it.

>>17596539
I have a lot of girlfriends that have this problem "guys like me, why can't I get a boyfriend wahhh" and its usually because they're boring. Men are attracted to them for their looks but when they get to know them or look for personality there's nothing. If you're hot then you're nice to look at but if you're hot *and* funny(or interesting, etc.) then people will want to spend time with you. But >>17596544 is right, girls just enjoy flirting with a good-looking guy.

Girls:
How do you feel about lonely guys who keep on getting rejected? Guys who can't seem to get any breakthrough in the relationship department despite their efforts?

>>17596341
>>17596498
Yep, evolution. Simple as that.

What i always wondered though is why there isn't more tension on the female side of this, ie why submissive traits just totally shit-stomp their competitors, especially considering the massive risk that they will be passed on to both male and female offspring and not just the females, when the reverse is much less damaging, as well as the hugely benefit of passing on positive traits to both (ie taller, stronger mother > taller, stronger sons).

I suspect this can be explained by modern men being too opportunistic, ie making the conscious decision to go for what they perceive to be easier targets instead of premium ones: however, with the low female reproductive volume and high success rate, i can't see how this effect could possibly be strong enough to counteract the above over multiple generations (since its fitness effect is basically constant).

>>17596539
Besides what the others said, look at your own strategy as well. What are you looking for?
If you're looking for something rare, it's naturally going to take you a while to find it.

>>17596795
>why submissive traits just totally shit-stomp their competitors
Ask yourself what's the evolutionary advantage of submissive traits first.

>>17596815
Obviously reproductive success, ie getting impregnated early and often.
But this should stay pretty much constant over generations.
Whereas more dominance, when passed on to sons, leads to better success for them, especially with more dominant women, compounding the success over generations.
The positive effect on sons should greatly outweigh the negative effect on daughters, right?

The big risk that comes to mind is having this completely negated in the case that such traits increase the bias towards more submissive partners.
I know i've seen research linking dominance traits in women to chance of lesbianism, but i haven't run into anything on the male side.

So I'm kinda, well am a gun nut. How would I be able to meet someone who does think I'm crazy or a guy who's compensating. Any way I could introduce them into my hobby.In