How do I stop obsessing about my gfs past?

>>17587411
>two relationships, ie tinder hookups
Those aren't relationships

>advantage of her for sex
But she wasn't taken advantage of, she would have consented

>I know im being a hypocrite
Good, so cut it out.

>>17587411
How do you think she feels about you bot being a Virgin? Don't go in a relationship if you can't stop being a selfish autismo

wish I knew

I dropped mine and found a traditional qt Virgin (really)

it has its downsides though. she's a fob and her English isn't perfect. but I'd rather that then multiple exs
it's just something I couldn't get over

>>17587414
>But she wasn't taken advantage of, she would have consented

Let me clarify. She dated two guys on tinder. They smooth-talked her into sex, but she wanted commitment, she eventually broke up with them.

>>17587415
She doesn't really mind. Which makes sense, men are seen as more attractive if they're sexually experienced

>>17587418
>Let me clarify. She dated two guys on tinder. They smooth-talked her into sex, but she wanted commitment, she eventually broke up with them.
She still consented to sex. If she wanted to make sure they were committed, she should have made them wait until they were committed before she had sex. She's not a victim

>>17587421
okay well great, so she had sex for the fun of sex. that makes me feel better

>>17587424
You're being irrational to begin with so...

>>17587416
Chinese exchange student?

>>17587416
>she's a fob and her English isn't perfect. but I'd rather that then multiple exs
>my insecurities are more important than a well-functioning relationship

>>17587426
Yes, that's why I wrote

>Yes I know this on a logical level

>>17587432
>language barriers = shit relationship

Nope. Qt virgin with slightly bad english or roastie stacy? I'll take the fob

>>17587437
>language barrier and fob = less than ideal relationship

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>>17587411
So, what kind of advice are you looking for, exactly?

You know that you're wrong, you know that you're being selfish, and you acknowledge that all of these are purely your fault. What exactly are you asking here? Just stop being selfish. Problem solved.

Is any man truly comfortable with knowing their woman has swallowed another mans cum?

I doubt it. Either get over it or end the relationship

>>17587411
nice dubs

if you can't handle it or get over it the relationship isn't likely to be healthy and it will eventually end.

the basis of any strong relationship is open, honest communication and trust. she can't go back on her past, but you can talk to her about it and see if that changes anything. if anything I think it would make her have ill feelings towards you, but something has to facilitate change.

Other anons are right, you should definitely move on from this, get over your little hurdle and just enjoy your relationship rather than worrying about the past which is ultimately irrelevant. And if you seriously feel like you want to be with this girl, talk to her about your feelings and get it in the open, you can't lack communication if you want a healthy long term relationship.

Talk to her
Leave her
Get cuckd

You really have to get used to it in this day and age, sentencing yourself in this day and age to a perfect virgin will make you 30 y.o. and single in most cases. I draw the line on anything above a boyfriend 1 on 1 sex. Things like group sex, ridiculous numbers of sex partners (I am 23 and would never date someone with more than five, will change with age) etc.

The way I see it as long as you fuck her better, it makes no difference.

>>17587411
you mean to tell me this girl is the only female on the planet that didn't know tinder if for hookup fucking? bullshit. you are trying your damnedest to make her into some special snowflake and she is not. get in the real world

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>>17587483
>>17587537

Oh ya retards because a girl lying is something she would never do.

Let me spin you a tail. My best friend was dating a girl. Now she was by all accounts a good girl and came off as innocent. My friend was head over heels for this chick and said she might be the one. Well we were all drinking one time and having a good time at a party when she let it out. Originally she told him she was with 1 guy but she admitted drunk that she has been with tons of guys in the past. Friend pushed for an answer and she whispered 15 to 20.

Now I am not saying don't trust any women, I am just saying take their word for it is something a fool would do. Best not to ask because you will get either lied to, then find out the truth in the future or be disgusted breaking up wit her.

>>17588129
It was b4 ur time though.
Unless she could have an STD, it does not matter.
If you're insecure then it might, but generally speaking it should bear no toll on you unless you're some moral extremist. :-)

>>17587421
This. I refuse to fuck outside a relationship. I've been on thousands of dates because it's damn near impossible to find a dude in his 20's that wants more than 30 minutes of your time. Each time they start getting heavy, I stop them and say "I'm looking for something serious."
And I never hear from them again. It's not hard.

>>17588160
Well my gf still did it, the guys were being ambiguous about it and she got fed up and left them. At least thats what she told me

>>17587411
>I wonder if sex between us is truly special?
No, it isn't. She's used goods and all you're doing is using your dick to stir another mans porridge.

>>17587411
Learn to be comfortable with yourself and you will eventually be comfortable with her past.
You sound like a dude with some insecurities just by the way you type.

>>17589362
I cant tell if youre being serious or sarcastic

>>17589368
What does me being insecure have anything to do with my gf having other mens dicks inside her

>>17587411
Get
over
yourself


Your insecurities are the only issue here. Go to the gym, eat better meals, etc because your confidence is the only issue here.

>>17589372
>What does me being insecure
>Sometimes I wonder if sex between us is truly special?

Obvious insecurity, you said it yourself mate.

>>17587418
>They smooth-talked her into sex
HA HA

Yeah, okay, dude. You believe that. Even your girl knows how idiotically insecure you are. Your relationship is doomed. Move on.

>>17589372
lol

>>17588141
>>17588129
> moral extremist.
Or religious.

Women are more likely to lie about their number because of ignorant concepts of morality like this dipshit:
>men are seen as more attractive if they're sexually experienced
because the opposite is true for women even though it is plain stupid.

Oh wait, that is op...

>>17589392
Thats what she told me. She said the guys "always knew what to say" so she kept having sex. She was the one who said it that way not me.

But anyways, why does it matter? Whether it was in a relationship or not, she had sex. She shared her first with another man, and I will never get to experience that, and that hurts me on a deep level unlike anything else.

Maybe its cause im possessive. Maybe its because if Im her first, she's truly "mine", which is what I as a man desire of a girl. I get that its wrong to think like this in our modern liberal society, but I just cant help it

Should I break it off with her? Ive come to terms with the fact that i cant love a non virgin girl. So why lead her on? Alternatively I could talk with her, but I dont want her to fee guilty because of her past actions. Or I could just suck it up and pretend it doesnt bother me, and suffer silently

>>17589441
Motherfucker how dense are you exactly

>>17589441
You can play your victim card and spin this off as an issue with "modern liberal society" or you can take responsibility for your insecurities and work on them.

It looks like you've already made your mind though, but here's some unsolicited advice anyways: Everyone has a history, and the older you get the harder it'll be to find someone who doesn't. Yourself included.

Do yourself a favor and get over this. Or suffer silently, because you'll far more likely be doing that looking for a non-virgin pure waifu than committing to a completely normal girl.

>>17588129
My fwb told me she was only ever with 2 other guys but turns out it's been like 7 or 8 including one while we were fwb
We don't always use condoms

>>17589457
Youre assuming the more confident someone is the less they will care about their partners past. Even the most confident man in the world would choke if they found out their gf did bukkakes and whatever. I dont see how "just be confident bro" is a solution to this problem

>>17589441
thing is OP you cannot give your virginity to some virgin girl. why should she if she thinks like you?

>>17589636
Because sex is different for girls
Losing your virginity as a girl is more significant than a guy

>>17587411
Fucking loser

Protip sex is never inherently special, the only worth it has is what you internally give it. Meditate, realize that fucking her is either special or isn't, and then stop worrying about it.

>>17588129

>1 time i knew a girl who lied
>never trust a girl

ok

>>17589604
Those are two different situations. If a man has a problem with his girlfriend having done bukkake then it's an issue of sexual incompatibility. A man that has a problem with his girlfriend having a past has an issue with feelings of inadequacy and being unable to deal with being compared to other men.

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>>17587411

If you can manage to make a half-ass attempt at maturing and absorbing life experience until you're about 30 years old then this little childish hiccup will take care of itself.

There's literally no point in all of us trying to explain this to you because you're a kid and, much like kids, your emotional and impulse control is shit.

You know you're being a dick. You know you're being dumb but you can't control the little baby boy inside of you who is throwing a tantrum right now.

Grow up. I don't mean that sarcastically as an insult but literally; live your life successively one day at a time and pay the fuck attention to your mistakes and what is going on around you until you have accumulated the months and years necessary for growing up.

At the end of the day..you are the one giving her pleasure..you are the one fucking her..no one else...sure she had sex in the past..it isn't something she will think about..it isn't something she will remember when she is with you! So it is as if it didn't happen?

Anyway..need some advice too please! I am 22 virgin girl..I get a lot of advances from men..but just for sex etc..my friend (female) told me men don't like women who are virgin (makes sex boring etc)...so I was thinking of losing it to a random friend instead of a serious relationship...shall I go ahead? This tread is making me think twice :/

>>17587411
I'm gonna go on a limb, and probably be swarmed by disgruntled women (and men). But I don't really give a shit.

>Man who can gain many partners = good
>Woman who can gain many partners = bad

Why? A man who can convince women to have sex with him generally has something going for him. Wealth, Resources, Charisma, Status, or A muscular appearance are some, and women desire these attributes for both obvious and evolutionary reasons. Can he protect me? looks like it. Can he supply me with a lavished life? Sure. Can he provide a stable supply of resources for our children? Check. Women couldn't care less of about a man's history, if he can take care of both a previous family and hers. Or if he has the resources to deal with the other woman and not intrude upon her standing with the man.

Men want women who are supportive, nurturing, LOYAL, and attractive. Will she give me healthy children? Yup. Will she stay loyal so I KNOW the children are mine? Good. Men want few partners because they are dependent on this woman's trust, so that they know that their kids are his too. We want are women to treasure the act of sex as both an important bond, and the implication that they may get pregnant.

Women with many partners before us don't offer that security, and as we commit time and resources we second guess how faithful they will be, and how expendable we may be. Women don't generally have much to lose (physically) in childless relationships, and we don't wanna get tossed aside like their previous partners.

That said, life is unfair for everyone in different aspects. OP get over it or dump her, and roasties realize you're roasties.

>>17589909
No
Its a myth that guys dont like virgins

Try to have sex with someone that cares about you

>>17589909
No. It did happen, she had sex with guys before OP. And at some moments (not necessarily during sex) she'll think about those times. Be it romantic or not).

And it really doesn't matter, wait or not, have sex with your friend or wait, it doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is how YOU feel about it, and the consequences that come with it.

>>17589909
Unfortunately a woman never forgets

>>17589976
I feel bad about it. What should I do

>>17589983
Just find someone who you feel comfortable with, just wait.

>>17589983
Die alone or live on the fringes of societal acceptance.

With each year your virgin pure options will get slimmer and slimmer, unless you start trying to enter relationships with younger women and teens. Each month that age gap widens.

The fact you think all men are like you and don't value the time the lost their virginity is fucking self-centered and ludicrous. Not every man is like you.

Realize this insecurity is as stupid as a fear of butterflies and get over it, or break up with her and try to Wade the Watters of a draining dating pool.

>>17590056
>With each year your virgin pure options will get slimmer and slimmer,
In the cuck USA maybe
almost any other country, no.

>>17589883
I don't necessarily care about being compared sexually. I just wish I was my gfs first, so it would be more special, ie we would discover things together

a non virgin will always be some other guys left overs

always

The fact is if you want a GF above 5/10 over the age of 16 you're going to have to accept that guys aren't likely to have left her alone for you to one day magically show up in her life.

Virginity isn't really a great measure of whether or not a girl is good relationship material anyway, or even a measure of"""purity""" at all. You could have a girl who has had sex before but is loyal and devoted to you. You could have a virgin gf who is shitty and treacherous. There's gotta be trade-offs.

Personally I think the perfect set up is a GF who has had a few past partners, but they were all lame experiences that only serve to make you look vastly better by comparison, and discourage her from ever wondering what else is out there.

btw, girls think about this sort of thing too. My GF broke down into tears when she found out my own history was a bit more detailed than she assumed. It was weird having the tables turned on me like that.

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>>17587411
>How do I stop obsessing about my gfs past?
same way you stop thinking about a green pig or stop manually breathing. you just find other shit to think about.

or just remind yourself that every time you think about her fucking someone else, you're thinking about another guy's dick. why are you thinking about other guys' dicks? are you some kind of faggot or something?

KYS