How to make decent friends

>>17555376
What school?

>>17555435
sorry I dont give that private info out online. its a smaller school about 2 hours away from any city in some mountains. its a beautiful school and i prefer its small size but everyone here drinks and parties and the ones i do try and be friends with who are fine having a movie night after theyre done partying wont respect my boundaries and that im taken

>>17555443
You went to a small school in the middle of nowhere, what did you think people were going to do other than drink?

Anyway get active in clubs and talk to people from your classes who you thought said something interesting.

I am literally in the same situation as you. The best advice I can give to you is talk to your classmates (you'll get a good idea of how they are) and try to befriend the older ones, because they're usually not into that stuff anymore or just try to befriend someone you can be with during class time but make them know you're not into partying / drinking so they don't bother you at night.

>>17555467
I was hoping to find more like minded shut ins like me. Why would people go to a small school to drink and party? that makes no sense. I try and get active in club but they all seem so clique-ish

>>17555520
I dont mind if they bother me as night as long as its not to go out

>>17555561
>I try and get active in club but they all seem so clique-ish
Hate to say it but if you've tried several clubs and they were all this way then the problem is with you, not them.

>>17555582
I know, Im really shy and introverted but I mean I can't just not have even 1 close friend

>>17555589
Sorry anon but you only got a boyfriend without having to try because you got lucky and were born with a vagina. If you want more friends you have to actually put in effort, leave your room and fucking talk to people. No one wants a completely one sided "friendship" with a boring shut in who apparently hates fun.

>>17555376
most people are like that
if you want something better you should probably change the path of your life

>>17555376
I am a heavy party drinker, I smoke cigarettes when I'm trashed sometimes, tend to be loud way more often than not, I get wild, and I'm often the center of attention whether it's a good or bad thing company permitting because I have a very low filter.

One of my closest friends who I've had since high school is a shut in full time other than for work. He stays home and plays games or watches anime any time he isn't working, and when he was in college, did the same thing, and in high school, did the same thing.

He doesn't really have any other friends besides his roommate from college (he lucked out that the guy was also a shutin type of fellow) that he hangs out with. In this context, that guy would be similar to your bf in your scenario.

Up until the last year he didn't drink anything ever, he doesn't smoke, and he doesn't do drugs. No one ever pressured him to drink in "my group" that he's a part of that is now also "his group", and he only drinks maybe 1-2 drinks in an entire night if anything at all because he found some mixed drinks that someone made and tried them and decided he liked it, but he never gets drunk.

He still has a blast with us whenever we go somewhere, often times if we're being stupid he'll just relax and take pictures or videos of us and tease us or make jokes about stuff during the times we're hanging out or when we hang out later. We often switch off between doing stuff like having in-nights where we play board games at his place or mine, watch anime as a group of 5+ people that he puts up on his projector, or playing video games because he sets up 5+ scrapyard pcs from parts he had laying around that he built up.

Other times, he comes with us while we go out to do things while drinking like bowling, laser tag, movies, whatever else, and often times he'll be our DD since he doesn't often drink and never has, which means we all get to enjoy ourselves and no one has to worry about a drunk driving accident later.

cont.

Take a japanese language class. pretty much everyone there likes anime, but there are many subgroups to choose from.

>>17555376
>>17555725

Personally, I've never had any qualms with a "square" guy like him being my polar opposite and still one of my best buds, and he's actually broken out of a lot of the social anxiety he had when we were in high school because he's been around me for over a decade now.

I'm not saying that you need to go find someone with this much of an extreme to be your friend, but honestly, the way you talk makes it seem like you're looking down your nose at potential friends because they like to drink and party and you don't. There are plenty of social drinking parties and experiences that are much more toned down than the frat boy movie style parties, especially if you take the time to talk to people before attending one and gauge their character a bit. They do not need to be exactly like you, and you're never going to run into another person who IS exactly like you, because they're going to do what you do, give a half-hearted attempt at finding people to hang out with, give up immediately, and go home by themselves and hop on the internet.

This isn't meant to hurt your feelings or judge you, just to give you the insight from the other side of the "drinkers and party people".