My gf went behind my back and kissed another guy and let him

Leave her. She's gonna fuck someone else.

>>17537996
entering difficult territory desu I'd wait it out and see what happens.

>>17537996
Hard to say, man. It's your call. If you can live with the risk of it happening again, then keep it up if you can. Tell her that, basically. That she's worth another chance.

Dump her, she cheated on you. Cheaters always feel bad, it's called self-loath.

>>17537996
She's a cheating whore leave her there's no other option

Yeah man everything she says including the wanted to feel exciting shit, bs. She is a dumbass with emotions and the only reason she's making them out to u is so u stay and she doesn't hurt your feelings so she could be cool and not have a guilty conscience. She doesn't know jack shit about what she's talking about LOL. It's all bs shes making up on the spot so u don't leave. You may be like, that means she loves me right? Nah. Shes saying it so she doesn't hurt ur feelings or hers.

You wanna know why she won't eat? Lol two reasons. She feels guilt for HERSELF because she's stuck in a relationship. And two the dude probably had a nasty mouth and bacteria transfers and that shit. Trust me man. This is truth.

She'll go further next time. If u accept now your letting yourself be walked over. Plus, you'll be more willing to accept the next time too. It's human nature to allow things to keep happening.

In the move Ants, you could find the scene online. Look it up for real. The main grasshopper throws food at the dudes laughing because an ant stood up to them. He says, that's just one piece of food right? Then laughs, haha. Then the grasshopper moves the lid and out comes a shit ton of food. If you let one ant in, then they all are gonna come in. They all stopped laughing. THIS SHIT IS REAL.

You gotta put the lid on this and dip or it will effect all areas of your life bro. I had this advice but no way in hell I was gonna give up the girl I loved. A year later and it got way worse and fucked me up. I'm finally better. I wish I cut it off man. You will too. Let her out and don't look back.

>>17538006
>>17538005
>>17538000
Well shit bros. No chance of any forgiveness? From what I know he never even saw anything, which doesn't much improve the situation I know. Definitely considering just dropping her, but till now shes been fairly special. I considered her the only person I could really identify with on any level. After her I have no hope or faith in any woman. Is it really so easy to just let go?
>>17538002
>>17538003
Considered this as well. Distance emotionally until I've gathered enough information to make a sound decision, attempt to guide her until then? Or should I consider what she did as enough information and just give it up

>>17538012
Tbh she isn't trying to keep me. She doesn't want to lose me but by her words she "already has" when she fucked it up. I got her to slow it down and calm it a bit, so things are sort of in limbo as we mutually think things over.

>>17538032
Tactic to get you back. If it's not out nature as men is to accept them back. Trust me I'm gonna Jam this into your head. Dip now. My ex did the same shit. She said leave I'm no good for you. Your already gonna leave. And I was like, no. No. I won't leave I'll give you another chance. I'm the Savior. Then she got a tattoo of my LIPS as a promise to never do it again. It happened again a month later. Trust me bro. If your girls not the same, she fucking is. Trust me man.

Any loyal chick wouldn't let it go that far no matter how drunk. The drunkness would turn them off. I'm thinking about what u are right now. No man, any real loyal chick wouldn't go that far and "like" it.

Unless ur into trying to figure out if ur tasting someone's dick on her breath in a year, please continue.

>>17538041
Are there even loyal girls, anon? No matter what I've tried, who I've dated, personalities ibe tried, it's all failed. No matter how I shape them, guide them, help them, they all end up worthless sluts and whores in the end. Why? Are there just no decent people on earth? All I want is someone reliable and loyal. Those are my standards. Everyone is a miserable failure. What am I doing wrong?

>>17537996
I'd say you need a 6 month breakup to see who you are thinking about and whether she's worth the effort...

If you have any hope there is someone that would be a better match for you, I'd say you need to make yourself available, not locked with trouble.

>>17537996
The only fucking reason she'd cheat is because you treated her wrong or something like that. You're here for an answer to what question, precisely, I don't know. You want help? You need to get your dick wet every once in a while and your source is getting rekt.

Just give her her time and space and let her know that you're there for her and that she needs you to take the reigns on this and give her a sexual piledrive that rhymes with freedom which will enable her to do anything that she desired or ever will desire. Her every whim is your desire, by extension, subconsciously or otherwise. If you don't let her fuck somebody else, somebody else is going to let her fuck somebody else, and anyone who says otherwise is a fool. Your mind is a house with locks and keys like any other construct and if you can't find the keys to your girlfriend's house, someone with them is going to take them and fuck her to pieces with her complete consent. He's probably going to have a bigger dick. And more skill.

>>17538054
I've lost all hope.

>>17538057
Could you repeat this in English please holy shit

>>17538020
>Is it really so easy to just let go?
No, but if you have any respect for yourself you're going to. Trust me, she's not going to respect you anyway, and the relationship is going to get a lot worse.

>>17538060
>>17538057
Wait are you implying the solution is to give my gf total freedom to do whatever she wants with whoever she wants

>>17538052
Well bro. There are loyal girls. My first girlfriend was extremely loyal. The girl I'm seeing now, knock on wood. Loyal.

My current girl is amazing. I know she'd never hurt me right now. If I see any signs, I'm leaving. It's how it has to be. Still too soon to speak.

My first gf was loyal for 3 years. And I mean loyal we broke up and she told me she had sex with another dude. It was pure because she actually told me the truth. No bullshit feelings or bullshit. That's how I knew she loved me.

My ex was a huge shit train and I went thru so much shit. Im trying to save u from that he'll man. It's been two weeks and this new girl I'm talking to has real feelings man. She's so cute. Makes me feel loved and happy. You'll find it man, you can't trust hoes though. You gotta stick up for the generation and drop this hoe. Be the alpha bro. Do it for all the niggas who we're in that boat and wish they coulda dropped their girls.

Oh and listen to some kodak black.

>>17538057
>The only fucking reason she'd cheat is because you treated her wrong or something like that.

I want you to know that you've been detected.
You're something. What it is particularly I don't know.
But it's the type of thing that is objectively wrong. That's you.

>>17538060
There is a natural hierarchy to men and women. The smarter ones don't always seem that smart, and the dumb ones are easier to tell apart. The word is, one way or the others, "heat." We are wired to be attracted to each other for one reason or another and you should not be surprised that the answer is sometimes genetic superiority. Some species are meant to die out. Some species have fought hard and well for their survival. May they prosper.

Meow. So this girl cheated light. Light. And you're OP wondering if this is reason to... what... declare a vendetta? Declare war on her friends and family? Do you need to suddenly skip town? She cheated. Whatever your judgement is, it seems like that's not really the kind of thing that you're in for. If you are in for that kind of thing, and are okay with your chick getting shithandled by other dudes, then be my guest. Know that after a certain point, in the event that maybe this is a relationship you didn't really want, you can always trade up. It's an open option.

>>17538068
Yeah, that thing is a Meow Meow Meow Meow.

>>17538070
Your ramblings are hard to decipher my dude. Either you're suggesting I stay with her and let her fuck whoever, or you're suggesting I go nuclear and deal with her fucking other dudes.
>>17538065
Been through 4 girls now since freshman year highschool almost 9 years ago, little time spent single. All disasters.

>>17538068
(I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW I THINK THAT"S PROBABLY NOT AS COOL AS YOU THINK IT IS)

>>17538068
And...dude. I am vetted as ffffffffffffffffuck.

>>17538078
What exactly is it that you need clarification on regarding my comments?

>>17538083
You're suggesting a course of action of some form, can you tell me clearly what you would do in my situation, and/or how you would find the solution to our now slightly fucked relationship. Good luck

>>17538088
Break up with her.

>>17538092
Thank you>>17538092

>>17538065
>There are loyal girls
Dude, lie to me.

>>17538020
Here's the thing dude. You think you can't love anyone as much as you love her, but you can, there are other people out there, some who may click even more. The thing about cheating is that even if she is truly remorseful, you have no way of knowing for sure. Some people can forgive stuff like that and they end up completely okay, but I know I couldn't. I'd feel like I was telling her "I will forgive you for this in the future if you do it again." That's why it's always a one strike rule with a lot of people. And that's not even covering resentment.

So if it were me, I'd break up with her, yeah. But you and I are different, so you have a lot of thinking to do.

>>17537996
The self loathing and dispair that is making you feel sympathetic to her, is actually the biggest part of the problem. Her low self esteem is what is going to keep her seeking out other male validation, even though she has a devoted bf. She amplifies her insecurities for your sympathy, but the second you take your eyes off her, she is going to be batting her eyes at someone else.

DTMFA

>>17538111
I feel as though you are correct.

>>17538105
Maybe I could find someone to love as much as her, sure. Say I do. What do I end up with? Another lying cheater eventually?

>>17538116
Nope, you get lucky and find someone with a different value system and will be loyal, and you click with. They do exist.

You'll know what to look out for now, and also cheating doesn't make someone inherently bad. You're at an age where people are having sex a lot. One slip, although it does mean the current relationship has to end, doesn't mean that all future relationships that person has are now sabotaged.... Assuming they learned their lesson, of course. I've seen it happen.

>>17538119
These slips are hard to be okay with dude. I mean christ have you even seen the stats on the correlation of number of sexual partners and relationship happiness and marriage stability? It fucking tanks as soon as it's more than 1

>>17538119
>cheating doesn't make someone inherently bad.
"bad" can be an extreme term, but it implies a certain level of malfunction.

>>17537996
break up. stop listening to her ramblings but more important stop trying to make sense of what the did. All you are doing is trying to get your head in a place so you can live with what she did. Fact. She cheated on you. Why should you care if she is upset or listen to any lie that passes her lips. There is no such thing as mild infidelity

>>17538138
I'm just at such a loss. I could never picture this from her, not in a million years. It's truly shocking, and I'm really starting to feel that hurt

>>17538147
Because you got bamboozled. Don't be captain save-a-hoe, dump the bitch and cut all contact. You deserve better than being betrayed.

she doesnt give a damn about you
shes worried she will be labeled as a cheating/easy whore
bad reputation, need to weasel her way out of it

she doesnt need your forgiveness
what you should do is break up, and let everyone know shes a cheating whore

>>17538147
It has happened to all of us and unfortunately multiple times. The hard part is accepting the truth. If you had a loyal girl this would never have happened. None of it. Your girl is not loyal and will never be. Stop listening to the spin and stop trying to come up with an excuse for her.

>>17538158
Just wish I could find a loyal girl. Don't think I've ever had one.

>>17537996
>Doesn't regret what happened
>but hates herself deeply and feels great shame and disappointment

>noun
>noun: regret; plural noun: regrets
a feeling of sadness, repentance, or disappointment over something that has happened or been done.

She does regret it, but she wants other men. It's quite possible that she feels bad and cares about you still. She could be acting the way she is because she doesn't want to be the "bad" person in the situation, but truly wants to break up and play the field. She will continue to be an emotional wreck until she forces your hand.

Honestly, what I think will happen is a break up where she slut around for a while without any shame. Then comes back for forgiveness. It happens quite often.

TL;DR
She wants to play the field, be with other men.
She doesn't want to burn the bridge with you.
She wants to force you to do the breaking up, keeping her bridge back to you open.
She will slut around with no guilt after she forces the breakup, then try to come back after shes had her fun.

>>17538166
Maybe you are attracted to such girls, try to change direction

>>17538173
I'm thinking ill just end it with her for now since she's clearly too fucked to even think she can be loyal. If she wants to come back later it'll be a pretty thorough evaluation. She's never done drugs, only gotten drunk with me and hates alcohol, totally asocial and shut in, I'm the only guy she was ever with sexually. We can't even fuck unless we use prodigious amounts of lube and even then it's frequently too painful even after fucking many, many times. And it's not like my dick is huge. I don't know what shed even fucking manage to do. She's too terrified 8f stds for crying out loud

>>17538204
She also has no friend besides myself, she relys on me daily, hourly, every waking moment, to help guide her through simple things like what to do if someone is in her usual seat at the dining hall. How to call her doctor, when to speak to a professor. She'd be barely functional if I wasn't there to boost and encourage her. Because she's emotionally damaged.

>>17537996
Now the issue is that on one hand someone who cheats can and will likely do it again, because if they are the kind of person that can mentally justify it once they can do it again, however she seems to really be remorseful, and there is a slight chance she might change but that is very unlikely, and honestly if you respect yourself and know you can get another girl the better way is to break up.


If I was in your place I would break up with her after making sure she has a friend (preferably a responsible one that won't just make her fuck a bunch a guy to make her feel better) make sure she doesn't do anything drastic or get vengeful and do something like key your car.

So in the end my position is heavily heavily leaning towards break up because forgivness just sets yourself up for cheating again, as those who cheat and can mentally justify it (hers was basically its fun to break the rules) can and often will do it again. They actually do it so much that they almost singlehandedly drive the statistics for cheated relationships and divorces to untruthfully high levels.

Honestly its your call though man, but you are doing you and her both a favor by breaking up. Maybe the break up will make her snap out of the cheater's mindset and not be able to justify it anymore so you can spare future guys the terror caused by it.

>>17538218
I'm her only friend. She'll be alone.

This board is full of teenagers holy fuck

The fact that op is even considering staying is fucking HILARIOUS

the naivety is so cute. So young, so dumb, you will learn eventually op

>>17538226
find anybody, her family, make her have friends, etc.

you only hurt her and yourself more by not breaking up. You may find some merit in staying with her until you can get her friends and shit but honestly that just seems like a recipe for disaster where you will second guess yourself and not actually break up which is stupid.

>>17538239
2bh only OP and like one other poster honestly considered not breaking up.

>>17537996
The one good thing she has going on is that she confessed and feels like shit for her actions, her daddy must have given some sense of responsibility which is more than most women have. Problem is, she has urges inside her that tells her to play the field. You shouldn't be in a serious relationship with this girl.

>>17538248
And OP is leaning towards splitting >>17538245
I've spent years looking out for her, supporting her, helping her. If she does something like this and chooses to have a childish emotional meltdown, I'm not self sacrificing to save her from herself. Unless I feel a genuine gut feeling that she desires change, I think she's sealed her fate. Just I hope I don't see her pregnant in a trailer park

She literally told you she wants to cheat. She literally told you she think your relationship is over.

My expert opinion as an experienced armchair psychologist is that she wants to sleep with other people, but knows what a horrible thing it would be to kill your relationship for that reason. So she feels bad and sorry about herself. She is trying to force you to take responsibility for her feelings and actions and end it, but you're too beta to actually do it, further extending her suffering.

And no this does not mean that she does not love you or that she is lying about what she says. It just means she wants to fuck people that are not you.

>>17538166
Loyal girls are out there but you will never meet them while locked down with a disloyal one

File: 1470684837993.png (182KB, 570x332px) Image search: [Google]

182KB, 570x332px

>>17537996

>My gf went behind my back and kissed another guy and let him lightly touch her.
>She asked him to stop

Yeah probably the same way a girl says "don't put it in" when she's soaking wet with her legs open.

>she told me that she actually wished she could do more.

This red flag could be seen from the space station OP.

Dump her. Right now.

>>17538260
You have already decided OP it seems from this post. Go break up with her, but don't be harsh because as you said she is mentally unstable.

>>17538210
fucking stop. you are providing excuses for her. stop

>>17538264
Finding some comfort in this, can't fathom why she wants sex with others since she has a rock bottom libido, broken vag, inability to make friends and terror of stds. Whatever. I think I'll end it today.

>>17538276
ok go do it and then report back to the thread so we can make sure you don't chicken out like a little bitch and drag this out.

>>17538210
Stop trying to defend her, you fucking cuck.

>>17538264
This OP. You have to be keenly aware of the subtle hints women give off.

>>17538294
or in this case not so subtle. Most girls give you warning, some even before you get in a relationship with them but dumb ass men believe since they are fucking them it cannot be true. It is

>>17538000
This. Once a cheater, always a cheater (this coming from a cheater himself).

Also, you've been with her from hs all the way through college. That's when women usually are the most sexually active and she's been tied down to you the entire time, so she's of course gonna wanna "break the rules" again and again to see what she's been missing out on.

Dump her bro. You'll find a faithful girl in no time.

>>17537996
she wants you to dump her so she doesn't have to deal with the guilt, classic. She will cheat again no doubt.

>>17537996
Was in an identical situation as you. I forgave her and the relationship was great for almost a year. It also seemed that she genuinely regretted it since she would sometimes mention it months after and say she wished she had never done it etc.

She ended up cheating on me.

I would dump her.

OP, let me tell you two things. One I was in the exact same situation. gf told me she kissed someone else, and how she cried for hours after it happened, and that I don't deserve her, and that she's scared she's ruined things with me. I thought to myself "if she feels this bad, she'll never do this again" so I took her back.

One month later, she's dating another dude behind my back.

Your gf is playing the victim here, and really, aren't you the fucking victim? you got cheated on. She's hoping to make you feel sorry for her so she can somehow feel better for herself

You say she might be worth it...I thought my ex was worth it (hell, I even thought she was perfect for me) but is a cheater worth it?

The second thing is, here on this board, an overwhelming majority is saying dump her. One thing I learned is that if many people agree on one thing, chances are, it's the right thing to do. (obviously take this with a grain of salt, I don't want to get replies saying "oh a lot of nazi's wanted the jews dead, does that mean they were right?")

P.S. what's with her feeling sad and hating herself and all that, but saying she doesn't regret it? Who the fuck does something that makes them self loath, and say they don't regret it? Major red flag, I think. If anyone has an answer to that, I'll be happy to hear it.