All guys just want to is hook up?

You're not wrong in the sense that the vast majority of people will. It's a total personality thing. Some men that's their complete goal, some it's not. You may be attracting men who think that way. But in this day yeah, I'd say 75% of men are definitely looking to hook up on the first date. Just keep going, eventually someone will not push it and will look to get to know you better, without being a beta fag and what not, knowing that it's normal to wait a couple dates for sex.

>>17521588
You're attracting that kind of men somehow. But don't let me stop you from generalizing and being taken over by stereotypes. Hey, let me do the same here. All women are whores. How is that OP?

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>>17521588
>outgoing
>been around
then how do you meet guys ? at bars, clubs ?
l m a o

I'm a pretty traditional guy, I do research in harmonic analysis at a big university, but when I go to those places with my friends it is to look for hookups only

>>17521591

> I'm just afraid that high school is my last chance for any friends at all


Woman makes observation about the interactions she's had. Stupid bitch.

Man makes observations about the interactions he's had. Great red pill warrior.

Not to sound apologetic (because why) but that's just your experience and I think is true for both genders. Also maybe you pick them that way. Inb4 blaming the woman.

>>17521590
>>17521590
I have been literally doing this all my life. Lmfao. And yeah, you worded it quite simply- it's def a personality thing. I guess everyone's personality is a bit....hypersexual? I mean l am not joking when I say literally every date I've ever been on I've been expected to 'put out.'

>>17521595
Everywhere and in between.
Uni, classes, bars, clubs, work

Same general drill.

I've had friends tell me that it's my personality that makes me look like I want to hookup. I'm quite easygoing, laugh, and smile a lot. I've literally had friends tell me to stop smiling so much bc it makes me look 'easy.' Wtf does that even mean?

Also, I do agree that it is true for both genders, especially with the stereotype of the 'millennial,' apps like Tinder, and prevalence of hookup culture in the past 5 years or so.

>>17521608
>past 5 years

Please. People have always had hookups.

>>17521608
>my personality that makes me look like I want to hookup
really doubt it
post a pic and I will tell you

>>17521588

Hi OP, I'd say that it depends really. If a guy truly wants to get to know a girl he'll not do her on the first date e.g

I suspect that you are using Tinder for dating, however Tinder caters to the ones looking for a quick way to get laid.

why do you care?
if you're not saving yourself for marriage you're already a slut and there is no difference if your number is 10 or 1000. just fuck on the first date you prude.

I'd say this is mostly true. Men are just looking to hook up, especially around your age range, because the majority of them have a myriad of shit to do in their life.

They want to hang out with their friends and do hood-rat things, they want to persue education/careers/hobbies. People at this age, just don't have time to engage in a proper relationship, unless it's with someone that is your, figurative, dream person.

I'd say agree with the majority of anons here that are saying it depends, but people that are looking to get into relationships at that stage in their lives (early twenties) don't have much going on, or they're genuinely looking for some sort of connection. Why are they looking for that connection? Who knows, I honestly think it's the whole, you don't have much shit going on.

>>17521588
Im a man and I want to hook up as much as I can but not all men are the same,
If you want someone to 'let me get to know you as a human' maybe you are searching for a friend, You can meet someone to hook up and then know better each other or vice-versa.

>>17521647
>you don't have much shit going on.
This is very true. All my friends who didn't get into decent college are in relationships by now.

>Get into good college
>lonely as fuck
Makes you really think...

>>17521608
boy guys are so stupid. Don't know about OP but when I want to hook up I don't want or need a date. I'm ready go find and win and leave and no one else knows. If I want a date I have no intention of having sex right away even if I want to sleep with the guy.

>>17521591
>girl makes a thread about how she can't find guys who don't want to fuck on the first date
>adv finds a way to call her a whore anyway in the first 2 posts

never change, retards

>>17521588
You are probably only attracted to those guys.

>>17521608

"Each generation thinks it invented sex; each generation is totally mistaken. Anything along that line today was commonplace both in Pompeii and in Victorian England; the differences lie only in the degree of coverup — if any."

Anyways, I suggest you try going out with different sorts of men.

>>17521693
>>17521720
ooh aggressive

>>17521645
You manage to call her a slut and a prude in one and the same message. I think the Madonna/whore shit has reached its final form.

I guarantee if you describe the type of guy you're attracted to, it will answer your question. Chad doesn't want to settle down in his 20s. Stop trying to date Chad.

>I've literally had friends tell me to stop smiling so much bc it makes me look 'easy.' Wtf does that even mean?
It means you tip the balance from friendly smiling to flirting smiling without realizing it and it's making you seem aggressive.

>>17521733
For reference, I am a virgin. They can call me a slut all they want.

>>17521588
Well a man has to find the right girl. I love one. Now I date her. But I had to fight 1 1/2 years for it. Never had Sex with another girl or even thoughts about it. In the moment I started to love her, I was only hers, even with one side love.

>>17521647
Would it be realistic to say that 'waiting for the right person' is just stupid? I feel like I should just stop giving a fuck about my attachment issues (I feel like I can't handle engaging on that level with people I don't know well, in that way) and learn to be more emotionally detached by ngaf and just 'hooking up?'

>>17521751
I think you might be right about that last bit.

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You meet people at clubs and bars but are surprised they just want to fuck?

>>17521756
>I am a virgin
pls

>>17521588
No
They just don;t want to commit to YOU
Other girls are good
You are shit

>>17521814
I am? Are you saying I am lying? Because I am not. >>17521805
I said I meet them in class, work, and everywhere in between.

It's like catching a fish. You need to set the hook otherwise chances are you won't land it. Sometimes there are women they won't mind you any attention if your not trying to get with them. Although those whores are trying to indulge their ego (which seems to be the norm anymore).

>>17521588
u should find depressed boys who need a girl and dont just want a girl. or find someone who is in their thirties when ur thirty who is ready to be loyal.

Do you ask these guys of their dating history before you set up these dates with them?

If the guy is just as active as you in dating, 9 times out of 10 it's because he's still in his sexual prime and are trying to maintain it. Try going for a guy who hasn't had a girlfriend in at least a year.
>Less time fucking and more time reminiscing helps to make a much more stable man,
but such a simple concept can't be said out loud. What I'm saying now is worth money, and I'd be surprised if I didn't get banned for uncovering such an obvious bit of advice.

>>17521588
could be a few reasons. you might be boring, never approach guys or only go to places like bars/clubs. i personally would prefer a relationships over hooking up but there is always unnecessary drama with women, and i often get messed about.

>>17521608
Bars and clubs are for hookups.
That's your problema. If you are there people will think you are looking for a hookup.

>>17521791
>Would it be realistic to say that 'waiting for the right person' is just stupid?
There is no right answer. But people who bang anyone are considered whores and manwhores.

You can do whatever you want, having in mind that someone in the future, even a possible partner, may not like you because of that.

>>17521588
The larger part of men at your age do what to hook up, but the minority still has millions if men.

Just don't put out. I'd also suggest avoiding dating guys from bars and clubs since those are the places to hook up.

>>17521945
Where can I meet this 'minority?'

>>17521588
>really starting to think that the whole 'men cant control themselves' and 'all they think about is hooking up' is a reality
are you retarded? of course it is, like 90% of guys are like this. You probably ignore the other 5% that would have been good and the other 5% are shit and crazy.

Women are the same fucking way, I hate them(mommy issues mostly). But I've talked to maybe 15 women in the past 2 years, 11 of them wanted to fuck in the first 24 hours of talking to them and blocked my when I said no.
It's easy to get pussy, and that's all women are worth now.

You're young, just become like the rest of the girls who tramp themselves out, you probably already are and just don't realize it because you haven't given up. Honestly, that have a long meaningful relationship sails real fucking quick and there's a reason why when you actually have the first person you fall in love with crushes you.

All you cucks can't deny it. Your first heartbreak destroys you, you never really recover from it, so many self medicate, every time is easier after the last. It's because you're dead inside.

>>17521953
libraries probably, or anywhere. im part of this minority and there isnt particular place i go, most of the time im in my room desu, and if i do out its to bars with my friends, or on walks. i rarely approach girls desu, and i imagine alot of people like myself are the same.

i think sometimes guys might try and fuck you straight away because of the ominous frienszone. i never really know how to show a girl i want to be more than friends other than flirting with her. even guy and girl friends go for meals and shit now a days.

>>17521971
you are not apart of the good minority, you're apart of the 5% freak section. because you said desu.

>>17521984
And that's how you don't find the people you want.

>>17521984
that was 4chan filler. i never actually said desu. how new are you here? lol

>>17521953
Well I've noticed that guys that lean more towards intoversion are a bit more patient (usually). Are you sure you'd even be compatible with this type of person? Not to be rude, but you seem like the typical woman who loves being in the center of attention and loud about it i.e. a basic bitch.

I guess I would suggest looking at the same places like classes and uni where introverted people have to go but initating things with them. Most of the time they'll either be at their house or at a hang out spot with their circle of friends. You need to get them while they're forced to be out.

>>17521984
if you're op, you're a real bitch and dont really deserve to meet someone who wants a relationship.

>>17521953
the gym
trust me you can find many lonely guys trying to get fit to get a gf there, they would gladly wait a few dates

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>>17521984
Oh man, you really outted yourself there.

>>17521588
post pic of yourself
you probably resemble a famous porn actress

>>17521588
Are you actually stupid? No, seriously.

Let's think about this logically.

Man is friends with you.
That means he likes you as a person.
You have a vagina. And he likes you.
What do you think he's going to want to do if given the chance?

Mystery solved.

>>17522033
>Never refused an attractive girl because she better to you as a friend
If you're going to speak on the behalf of all men could you be less of a shithead?

>>17522041
The lack of self awareness is astounding

>>17522041
>oh you're a beautiful single girl that I, a single guy, like and we get along great and I have this chance to have a relationship with you but I'm not because you're such a good friend
Said no man ever

>>17522045
Nice argument kiddo. How about next time you actually try to mention something about my post?

>>17522041
How could she be better as a friend?

>>17522053
Some women are great friends but terrible lovers. It seems like we're arguing about different things.

>>17522053
I did.
Just because you wouldn't doesn't mean everyone would.
>inb4 no true scotts

>>17522058
>having sex = lovers
Spot the virgin

>>17522062
>Acting like sex isn't more emotional for girls
>Acting like girls won't get attached and act like you guys are a thing anyway
Maybe you're better at finding these fwb than I am.

>>17522063
>Acting like sex isn't more emotional for girls
>Acting like girls won't get attached and act like you guys are a thing anyway
Holy shit I can smell the smegma from here

>>17522063
the last girl i fucked acted pretty cold to me, and didnt want to peruse a relationships even though i wanted one.

>>17522063
Ditto.

>>17522062
>>17522065
>"le spotted the virgin" meme
How about you talk like a normal person instead of responding with memes? You're a little too hard to fit in.

>>17522066
I've seen that shit happen before. Would you agree that's more the exception than the rule?

>>17522069
>I've seen that shit happen before. Would you agree that's more the exception than the rule?

yeah, i would tbf. i thought it was unusual. before we even met or anything, i remember her moaning about guys only using her for sex. and im pretty sure she mentioned us getting together.

>>17522069
Calling someone a virgin for being naive about the opposite sex is a meme? You're making it real obvious you don't speak to anyone in real life, nerd.

>>17521608
Holy shit I have a friend like you. Early 20s, 7/10, in looks, total sunshine. But thats the fucking problem. Girls usually are not super friendly and outgoing with random guys. But the way she acts implies that she is attracted to them. Every fucking week there is story about some guy making move on her even though she was just "friendly". Guys are stupid so giving them false hints (even if unintentinaly) is calling for it.

>>17521693
>>17522728
>Guys are so stupid
so true ;(

>>17521588
>am i wrong
most of the time, no
>what do i do
stand your ground if youre serious about your convictions
>input
be prepared to wait and sift through a bunch of shit people. persistence is your best bet

>>17521588
if you want to fuck someone who got to know you as a person, fuck one of your friends. Otherwise, in every relationship I've ever been in(that wasn't with one of my friends), fucking basically came first, then getting to know you was afterwards.

Like, why would you want to spend all this time getting to know someone and liking them only to find out they're gonna be bad in bed basically forever?

>>17522732
tell you how stupid. Last three guys I agreed to a date and early in the evening as they took every approach and angle almost salivating I touched my tits and pointed to my vayj and said no, won't happen and smiled. Initially they are shocked, then try to back off and swear that was not their intent and 30 minutes later or at the end of the date they are making moves again. All one date wonders. They were not deaf so maybe they are just stupid or honestly believe they are irresistible

>>17522809
You're not a woman, but that's just fucked up, leading someone on like that, then denying it.

>>17522848
that's not leading them on but telling them straight it's not happening. What's hard to describe is some of the overt sexual comments these guys put out there. I mean first there is innuendo which I ignore then they go straight to bragging about what they can do. This is on the first date. They don't know me. Short of me getting up to leave this works fine.

>>17522864
I wish you were actually a woman so I could hear what a woman experiences and thinks in these situations, but rubbing up all on your tits and pussy, but then being like "no, you're not getting this" is just, I mean fucked up. It's fucking with peoples emotions and desires. I'm not saying what the guys you've been with supposedly have done is not fucked up, sure, but that's fucked up too. You're no better.

>>17522890
I touch my tits and point to my pussy and say they are wasting their time and it's a no. It is not as you describe. It is far from a come on and I happen to agree with you if it were as you describe then that is being a tease. What I want during a date is some respect, conversation on non sexual topics, so light fun and a decent meal. What I get is bravado and someone ogling my tits.

>>17522934
>>17522934
Oh ok, when you put it that way, I get it. So, generally speaking, how long until you put out, months of dating, week?

>>17522958
depends entirely on the man but the quickest turn off is over confidence. Went out with one guy and as we got out of his car he saw one of his friends and I saw him making an obscene gesture with a quick nod towards me. The friend saw I saw but the guy didn't and I started walking and called an uber. The guy was literally begging, wanting to know what happened and I ignored him so he called me a bitch and cunt. I told him to go fuck his friend.

>>17522987
That's quite brazen of him, but all guys don't act like that, so why not try your luck with the non douchebags?

>>17522997
I know all guys don't act like him but sometimes you never know till you get out with them. Like this guy, had he not seen his friend the evening may have gone fine because in the car he seemed cool. Maybe he would have been courteous and respectful until he made a move and flipped if I didn't respond sexually. Don't know but he sure couldn't help but indicate to his buddy what he planned for me later and guess he never considered I might not go along.

I have been trying to find a girl to date for months now. I'm going to be 22 in a week now. I don't even know where to begin looking!!

>>17521588
blame the feminist for supporting the sexual liberation and ruining marriage. the good men have realize they are better off alone then losing everything in marriage. you women have created what you hated the most a whole generation of pick up artist who only want to use you for sex.

>>17521588
Every guy I've dated has done this to me too.

I am assuming guys just want to see how far they can get before stopping.

Every guy I have dated, it usually went from general attraction, to a long period of hardcore flirting, to finally having a date. And I think that the set up of this, made them think they had the green light. I'd stop any further advances, and only kiss on the first date, like if they reached for the boob or the crotch.


But when I met my current bf, there was hardcore attraction. We had sex on the first date. Wasn't forced or anything. We've been together for several years now. I don't think it mattered honestly. But like, I knew I had my bf in the bag. The other guys I've dated, not so much.

ITT basic white girl who only dates douchebags wonders why water is wet

Put yourself first. Make money, develop hobbies, build a social circle, and don't compromise. Everything worth a damn in this world takes time and effort. Once you build yourself into something worth keeping, you'll find someone who wants you all the time. The world owes you nothing, so just having a vagina doesn't get you what you want. It simply makes you appealing to people who only want that.

>>17521588
I never had this problem until I went out with a black guy. He didn't try anything on the first date and went on a second and would hang out on campus but I wasn't feeling it with him. All the black guys started asking me out along with a few white guys and all of them were sexually suggestive immediately. I mean all of them. I was the same person and had not slept with the black guy though people saw us kiss.

>>17524727
perhaps the first black guy bragged about what a slut you were to his friends.

Nature of the beast. Now you decide.

>>17524738
but we were never physical. Kissed a few times and thought he was a nice guy but just no spark. Seems though it opened a Pandoras box and guys have made unfair assumptions I am easy. Especially the black guys and I'm having a hard time when I decline since some have intimated my refusal was race related. It's that I cringe when some guy addresses me as baby gurl up front.

C A L I
A
L
I

>>17524792
That's funny. It's actually racist on their part. Think about it.

>>17524792
you're not a baby girl ??? ;(

>>17521608
I'm the same way you are, I have this nice girl facade and a nervous habit of smiling all the fucking time and it makes me super approachable.

I've had the same guy try to give me his number twice at the same place, scared the shit out of me both times because he snuck up on me.

Like, I was sitting in my work truck one time, and the other time he came around from behind my truck and scared me. Didn't even try to make small talk, just "hey I'm anon you seem like a nice person heres my number " and I'm thinking "NO YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT ME IM A BITCH AND A HANDFUL LMAO"

>>17524803
I don't understand. I thought by going out with the one black guy it proved race didn't have anything to do with it, It's just now it seems all the black guys think I'm easy, the few white guys that are coming at me too. I mean like now 5 black guys to one white guy and some of the white guys I kinda liked avoid me so maybe it's the white guys that are racist.

>>17524834
It's because only trashy white girls date black guys. They now all assume you're trash.

>>17524838
this.
im not racist, none of my friends are racists, but this is the prevailing mindset. even if he was a goofy "Carlton" or Uncle Tom, everyone will still assume you only dated them because you are sexually adventurous.

it's sad things are that way, but that's what happens when the media hypersexualizes black men 24/7 and no one sees anything wrong with it

>>17524852
He wasn't a Carlton, a ball player though and popular on campus but surprisingly not arrogant. It's not hard to notice the black guys touch themselves a lot and really makes me uncomfortable

>>17524894
>He wasn't a Carlton, a ball player though and popular on campus but surprisingly not arrogant. It's not hard to notice the black guys touch themselves a lot and really makes me uncomfortable

Jamal probably told everyone that you ganbanged him and his five friends.

Men have much lower standards for casual sex than for relationships.

All the guys who wants to be your bf doesn't exist in your mind or you compare them to much more attractive guys and then choose the more attractive one and don't realize that he's out of your league.

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>>17524838
No way

>>17521588
I have been led to believe that if a girl doesn't want to bang you right away you're fighting a losing battle for a shitty relationship.

Kinda makes sense because that whole "making him wait" thing could be just masking disinterest. I know many girls would rather hook up with a guy they like pretty quickly so when they are not enthusiastic I assume they are not interested and move on.

If you want to go the route you're going, I suggest being honest and saying "I would like to take things slow but I am still interested in you". Anything but this is too vague and sounds like a cover rejection.

>>17525018
same here.
But only with white girls.

>>17521588
First of all, what's with all the hate? I can't understand where all thsi vitriol is coming from.

Second of all... you might need to change your approach, going on dates with people you hardly know doesn't seem to be working for you, why not date friends you've known for a while? Or try developing a relationship with someone naturally, rather than rely on the artificial and contrived method of going on dates.

>>17522756
God damn you are truly a slut

>>17522756
Agreed.

>>17525584
What exactly is the problem with testing out sexual compatibility upfront if you know its important to you in a relationship?

>>17525589
>>17522756
Sex is something you can work on. People can get better in bed, and/or they can learn how to please you better. Of course, sexual compatibility is a thing, and I'm not saying it will always work out. Some people also aren't as concerned with the sex as long as its with somebody they care about it. Some people prioritize commitment, compatibility, shared values etc. I've talked to people who don't really understand the good sex vs bad sex thing, they just think sex is a thing people do in a relationship.

>>17521588
>>obvs not in an extremely literal way, but there is a very high prevalence of this 'let me fuck u' vs 'let me get to know you as a human'

around half of them want to but you mistake interest with horniness

>>17521960

Pussy

>>17521953

The question is where can we meet you. What kind of clubs/classes do you go to? Uni and work are out of the question for me. Bars are a different matter. I'm curious about
where girls want to be approached.

Describe a good dating experience. I'd be grateful.

Because you're a cum dumpster.
You don't have the confidence or the looks to get to date guys around you. Yet you want to slut it up on date "hooking up" sites and you get mad when they want to fuck you.
Stay mad pleb, reevaluate your life. Guys aren't stupid. You are.

>>17521588
People who want to wait are either beta or are betas that care about personality, which it sounds like you lack. Just find a beta

Yes, 90% of the guys approach you anywhere want to fuck you. 5% are just looking to kill some time. The remaining 5% aren't looking to fuck you and are probably just making small talk.

>>17521588
stop dating out of your league. the reason these guys are only interested in fucking you is probably because they're good looking, highly confident guys that go on dates to get laid and that's it, no interest in relationships.

if you lowered your standards a bit you'd probably find a guy who is looking for a relationship.

>>17524832
M I C H I G A N
I
C
H
I
G
A
N

>>17521588
I'm the one you describe as. Nonexistant. Let me tell you something OP, the vast majority of humanity is hyper sexual. I've yet to form a relationship with a girl because they sleep with someone else between the time span of asking them on a date and the day of the date even coming around. I've only had one instance of actually going on a couple of dates with a girl and getting a kiss. Then she stopped talking to me.

It's the same for both sides OP, men and women. We are all shitbags.

The faster someone get on your pants the more attracted to him you seem to be. If I tried for a long time to bang a girl and she didn't let me do it I would just assume she isn't that interested.

>>17521588
I call bullshit

I'm a 30 year old male, social anxiety, no self esteem or confidence and I'm a virgin.
I'm not ugly and occasionally women ask me out

They want sex just as much as men want it. They just expect from the man to make the first move. Therefore while in the first dates they act nice and pleasant when they realise that I lack the confidence to kiss them or just hug them they become distant and leave.

Don't pretend that women don't care about hooking up, or that men don't care about getting to know the woman, that's just bullshit

>>17521588
It's just the way it is. A lot of girls are whores. What are you doing to seperate yourself from the crowd?

>>17521588
'let me get to know you as a human'
this has so far never been worth it.

>>17524834
/thread
ty for wasting my time bitch