Losing Best Friend?

Well it depends on what you want?

Do you want to "win" or do you want your friend back?

I want him to apologize for how he's acted towards me and find out why he would throw away our relationship like this.

And it isn't just me; he hasn't spoken to any of our mutual friends either.

In a lot of ways he seems too far gone; willing to throw away relationships for the sake of ideological/theological differences.

I would prefer to stay his friend though.

maybe the topic is just that delicat, maybe he has some hidden personal issues concerning said topic.

either way, more informations pls

I'm sorry to hear you're hurting, but I don't understand what's going on. What is this issue? What about this religious conversion makes this a touchy issue? Who converted, anyway: you or him?

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>>17514651
"You can't be my friend anymore because i've got a new imaginary friend"
This is going to sound fedora as fuck, but if someone treats you differently (and even worse) because he now believes in an invisible man in the sky, do you really want that guy to remain your friend?
I personally would fuck with his mind by asking him what kind of god would want him to abandon his friends then tell him to enjoy his new friendship and fuck off.

He never was your best friend, with best friends you should be able to say anything without them becoming butthurt over it.

Or maybe he was your best out of lack of better options.

>>17514704
>>17514692
>>17514711

As a spiritual issue, I've been strugging to understand where I want to go. I don't want to be atheist, but mainstream Christianity seems really boring to me. I've flirted with the more obscure stuff, but I know where that can lead.

We were both spiritually minded, but flirted with the concept of Christianity. He went on to convert to Orthodoxy, and has since gone full retard into it. I honestly am totally supportive of this, but since he's become extremely vindictive and self righteous. I told him I intended to convert too eventually, but that I couldn't throw away everything I've ever learned outside the lines of that theology. Apparently he did, and took offense to this. He got nasty and condescending. I told him he was acting like a zealot and to calm down. He took this as a compliment. I called him out for being a fucking dick about it, and he apologized.

Fast forward to later, I went to him and asked for advice on what to do concerning a spiritual matter, and he immediately went into asshole mode. I backed off, and that was the last time we spoke (2 months ago).

It's important to know that in the 3 years I've known him, he's NEVER acted like this to me. He's always been open, emotionally mature and respectful.

It seems he's literally willing to throw away our great relationship over a small disagreement/argument.

Do I finally message him and just confront his bitch ass over this, and potentially destroy the relationship for good?

Or do I take the high road and try to salvage it by being respectful etc?

>>17514746
That's the thing. We used to have that sort of relationship up until this point. This came so out of left field for me.

you should just tell him how you really feel, don't tiptoe around it

>>17514747
while i can not understand your points about religion stuff i think that he is acting like an ass.

at this point it's just painfull for you and you hang on more out of sentyment of how he used to be instead of what type off person he is today.

i would advice to confront him, best case he tends towards the right direction, worst case you now know it's useless with him.

i myself would propably harden my hard and let the relationship die down over time since i am sadly not a brave/comfronty person myself.

>>17514651
You don't like him when he's talking to you because he insults you,

And you don't like it when he's not talking to you because he ignores you,

So what DO you want?

>>17514921
I want to confront him about his new attitude. But I also want to keep the friendship. I probably can't have both.

>>17514672
>I want him to apologize for how he's acted towards me and find out why he would throw away our relationship like this.
You're not going to get what you want because he simply doesn't care.

>>17514998
link him this thread, like, srsly.

religions by shit some guy says and/or scripture are fucking nuts. it's not a surprise that you aren't getting alone with him anymore. don't form relationships solely on helping someone. if someone is friends with you primarily because they are dependent, that's not a fair or forgiving position, starting a friendship that is doomed to fail.

Oh, and if you are the one with the religion, I would not harass you for it. If he is coming off as harassing about your religion then maybe he is just a rude person or you are too touchy about it (or perhaps both). You gotta scrape off the people with no respect as well.

>>17515055
We've had disagreements before, but he's never been this outright disrespectful, rude and condescending to me. It's a new attitude he has picked up which I've never seen from him.

Honestly, I think I'm just going to talk to our mutual friends again to see what they think, then go from there with what to do. I'm probably going to just confront him.

>>17515091
>talk to our mutual friends
>confront him
>arguments of religion

yeah if you don't want to see this as beating a dead horse, just turn it to pulp. if you guys can't agree on religious respect or even general respect, then I don't see what the point in trying is.

The only way this could possibly work is if one or both of you comes out and says, "this is actually why I'm upset," and then stops being shitty towards one another, but I haven't seen stubborn people do that. I've seen people pretend to do that as well, and not actually do it.

I've been respectful of people in psychosis. Usually I touch some paranoid button or they talk way too long at me, but I never stop and say,"wub wub wub wub goddamn you're crazy" because that's uhhh not decent behavior

I mean everyone has their faults. I'm not damning someone for being rude, but you're talking about continued conversation with someone you aren't getting along with.

>>17515113
>>17515091
and your friends will probably give you some biased opinion, because telling a true opinion (like I am) is unattractive. they might say some shit like, "oh it's all his fault," which is just not constructive.

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You're not alone, anon. Two close online friends abandoned me over a SHIP almost 2 weeks ago. I tried to confront them through a different way with no response, and I may try again, a different way. I think you should try to get in touch with him and discuss this

I see a lot of people in this thread going full Dawkins tier athiest blah blah blah saying to end the relationship, essentially, because of his stupid imaginary religion or whatever.

And yet, these fedora fags are no better than OPs friend because the outcome is the same and they re making choices that affect their real life relationships based on their theological views.

Not only that but they fail to understand the theological underpinnings of faith and how it relates to daily life and society.

The point is, OP, >>17514875 probably has the right answer. If faith is a thing for you consider seeking advice from a clergy. Your friendship will probably never be the same tho.

As a separate issue, I'm reading between the lines and seeing maybe you're struggling with faith and this is playing a part too. Keep your search for finding the theology that fits you.

As someone who has lost a few good friends (for different reasons) it hurts and it will always have that weird break up feel, but you'll make new and maybe better friends in the future.

>>17514747
Yeesh, best you can do is give him some time to cool his jets. Maybe eventually he'll figure out how much he fucked up

>>17515127
>everyone is giving selfish atheistic advice
>promotes faith

Jesus Christ, religion, shut the fuck up. The only thing I'll go to clergy for is a hug. They can't even run food drives.

>>17515127
It was posts like this that I came for. Seriously, thank you.

There was a reason why I kept it vague as possible in the OP; I knew the atheist brigade would come out in force and basically act just like my friend, which isn't helpful.

>>17515155
>just like my friend
do you need your friend to respect your religion, or do you need him to agree with you?

>>17515168
Neither? wtf

I just want him to be my friend again, and I want him to stop being a fuckhead.

>>17515202
oh man this is productive

>>17515135
I bet you didn't know that clergy are trained in counseling and some social work functions.

>>17514747
> I don't want to be atheist, but mainstream Christianity seems really boring to me. I've flirted with the more obscure stuff
You sound like a retard. You're trying to wear religion as a fasion accessory and he finds that, like most would, to be fucking retarded. So he told you as much.

I see nothing wrong with what he said. You're taking something very near and dear to his heart and going "LOL EPIC ME TOO! MAYBE I'LL BE A ORTHODOX BUDDHIST OR SOMETHING TOO LMAO!" like a fucking teenage girl that just learned there's more out there than Christianity.

>>17515315
Where is all this anger coming from? Maybe we should have this thread about you and not me mate.

I'm just trying to figure out where I am spiritually. There's nothing wrong with that

>>17515505
as an atheist/agnostic free to define your morals and your place in this world, maybe? seriously, what the hell?

>>17515505
>umad
Stop trying to deflect from your own issues you self-involved cunt. It's clear to see with every post you make why he told you to fuck off.

>>17515315
>>17515563
>>17515652
How is trying to figure out myself spiritually and not jump into anything and commit being shallow? I personally see it as a cautious and serious way to explore religion. I don't want to commit to anything until I'm done actively searching.

How is this like wearing religion as a fashion accessary? He used to be much the same too, before he committed.

>>17515652
lel you don't really have any friends, do you? I mean I think her views on religion are pretty fucking dumb too but talking as if she should die and be buried next to hitler because of that might be going a bit too far

>>17515687
You have a fundamental misunderstanding of religion. You don't pick and choose which facets of faith appeal to you. That's why he's annoyed by you. His faith is in Christ. When he sees you look at that and go "hmmm, I don't like this one rule here, I prefer the rule they use in X, can I use that instead?", you come off as an idiot and one that's insulting his faith by pretending you might convert to something you clearly don't give a fuck about.

>>17515694
>u haf no friendzz
Come on m8. If you're going to be a whiteknight, you've got to do a better job than that.

>talking as if she should die and be buried next to hitler
I want you to take a moment to realise that you made this up. Then feel retarded.