Get it off your chest

>>17513598
Oh forgot last thread: >>17502888
Haven't made the OP in months. I bet half of us are still around though.

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I'm sorry, I have to get this off my chest.
I got into an affair on July 4 and got the girl pregnant at 19. >She don't want no child support
I left my job because they fail to provide pay on time. >shit pay system
I've lost my money to failed business ventures in the past year. >I learned a lot, but not enough
My bestfriend left the country for a better life in 'murica. >TFW lost with no friends to lean on
Friends that stay close can't help me. >no resources
now all I have is my GF. Says she won't leave me, and she's proven it twice already. > I love her, but sometimes I stray from the right path
Family turned their back on me, now all I have here is me. >no emotional support from them since elementary
Want to end it and be an hero, but I still have a lot to live for.
>GF
>The baby from the girl I knocked up
>plans
>hopes
>friends
Currently waiting for a call from any employer I submitted an application to.

>>17513598
I think I'll never meet that special someone i can start a family with

i'm scared that that no longer scares me and i'm slipping closer and closer to suicide

i don't want to be that guy who comes home to an empty, dark and cold house

>>17513598
i dont want to actually study business i want to study film.

>>17513658
tell the 19 year old to get an abortion for christs sake. and she doesnt want child support?!
>GF still loves you
literally what?!
your luck is fucking impeccable man. holy shit.

Couple things.

1. Hey A, stop being a pussy. You're hot, smart, and hard working. Stop wasting time with a 5'2 half asian faggot who's got severe drinking problems and a stupid addiction to video games.

2. I think I fucked up. There's this cute girl, Sam, that used to go to my highschool. We were pretty good friends up until middle school where I basically never contacted her after. I mean, I was in like 6th grade at the time, so I didn't give a fuck, she was a small friend that I basically never spoke to or saw again. I'd sometimes see her in the hallways in highschool, and I'd think she was looking at me sometimes, kinda like she sort of liked me. Wrote it off, she was very pretty in highschool though and I do remember her personality being somewhat in line with mine.

Well, before this, I never used my facebook in highschool, like ever. I hadn't used it since 8th grade. I graduated around 2 years ago at this point, and I started to use it again actively like right after I graduated and started college.

I was looking through my friend requests today and the most recent one is from Sam - I got it the summer I graduated. I'm like 99% sure that the crush I thought she had on me, she really had one.

I looked through her facebook, and I really feel like shit for her desu. She's very pretty at this point, but she moved like half the country away, goes to a local college and it looks like a family member recently died, but I got no idea.

The funny thing is, this girl told me a nursery rhyme I didn't know about when I was super young, and it's always stuck with me. She had a crush on me in like 1st or 2nd grade IIRC and she's the first (and sadly, only girl) who's ever held hands and walked with me before. Kinda makes me wish I kept in contact with her, might not feel like such a loser rn.

>>17513817
it's not luck that got me here anon...
and the 19y/o wants to keep the baby..

I'm sick of the lies and manipulation. You never had remorse for the shit you have done. Don't come talking to me like nothing ever happened...If you keep treating your other friends like that then they will leave your nasty ass. Time to burn a already broken bridge Bitch!

Im calling up the doctors today and getting put on meds. If the meds dont work, im probably just going to kill myself. I cant live with myself being a threat to people, especially those I love and care about

I gave someone $40 for a commission over a year ago, and he hasn't responded to my messages since November. Even though I have some money, I can't stop thinking about that $40 I wasted, and I'm dying to get $40 back by begging.

The theory is that if I earn $40 by working, it's money I just as easily could've gotten had I never been scammed. But if I get $40 by begging, then it's $40 I only got because I got scammed. So I have to get $40 by begging.

I am really fucking autistic about this WHY WON'T HE RESPOND TO MY MESSAGES?

And why doesn't Patreon have a feedback system so shit like this doesn't happen?

After my divorce, the intimacy I crave from another woman repulses me at the same time. I want to lose myself in another woman but at the same time never want to speak to another one again.

What the fuck. My mind involuntarily shuts down any thoughts of love or intimacy, yet I still want it.

>>17513869
I don't know what the medication is for. But medication is only half the solution with any mental illness. From depression, to anxiety, to bipolar disorder, to schizophrenia- whatever you're experiencing, they're only part of the battle. They help keep things in check, or stop them getting worse, and they help give you the ability to fight back. But you need to work on unlearning your coping mechanisms/thought patterns/habits that you've developed as a result of your mental illness. Psychiatrists and doctors help with the prescriptions. But you need to get yourself a good psychologist (ask for a referral) and put in some of your own legwork too.

Also, you need to be patient. Medication takes time to kick in, and sometimes doctors don't get it right on the first try. Doses that are too low, too high, they pick a type of medication that doesn't happen to work for you, or has very severe and debilitating side effects. If you feel it's not working well or not working at all, or if there are side effects that bother you, communicate with your doctor instead of doing something rash. Help them help you. Be prepared with a list of questions too about what to look out for in regards to side effects and anything else you feel you should know.

In the interim, this might be of use for you.
http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/index.html
There's resources for anything from anger management to depression on there. It is absolutely no substitute for professional help but it can be a useful accompaniment and short term aide. Good luck and good on you for taking the first step.

my crazy girlfriend, how dare they try and lock you up in the psych ward. i hope you're ok. last i heard you're hooking the the streets. good. atleast i don't have to get you out of the mental hospital

>>17513695
>slipping closer and closer to suicide
>because you don't have a gf
Don't worry, you'll stop being 19 eventually.

>>17513924
i wish that was the case

you're a shitty cunt for posting that though

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Going back to college after leaving two years ago because of a mental breakdown. I move in to a single this Saturday at 8AM, they've put me in as a "first year" and the single is because of the general anxiety disorder. Every one says it's a meme. Every normal person says they have social anxiety yet post to Facebook and meet up with friends on a daily basis. I'm apparently fitting criteria for paranoid schizophrenia.

Everything and anything scares me. I don't know why. There's no logical reason behind it. I constantly choke on my food and have damaged my stomach and throat as a result. I've always isolated myself, felt the need to be alone in a quiet place. Panic attacks aren't as frequent thanks to medication, but I'm going to aren't campus with over 50,000 people and in my building will be tons of 17 to 19 year old kids being as social as possible.

Not sure if I'm ready for this but I really need to go back do well in classes and plan for the future or else I'm screwed. I'm gonna try joining chess club and building a small table for my room to play chess on.

I'm just scared of another mental breakdown. Two years of being in and out of psychwards was the worst. I'm really worried about it all happening again. Fuck man.

>>17513927
Sorry, but this isn't an echo chamber, it's a board for advice. You don't want to get treated like a little bitch, then stop posting colossally stupid things.

>>17513936
My post isn't stupid, it was on topic

pull the cock out of your ass and act like a normal human being.

>>17513938
>My post isn't stupid
You want to kill yourself because you don't have a girlfriend. You're either between the ages of 16-19 or a twat.

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( continuing from last night's post. I'm this jackass: >>17510804 )

Man, the first night is fucking hard...
I was stoic all day and tried to keep my wits together. But as the sun falls and the night begins, your emotions start to fuck with you.

It feels as if, you drank way to much liquor, and you feel sick as shit. And everytime something reminds you of her, you feel like throwing up. You realize the best thing to do is sweat everything out, but you feel horrible.

I know its a weird analogy, but it makes sense to me.

It's funny, I seriously feel so alone right now, but I have people checking up on me.

I don't know, I just wish this could all end and I can continue with my life.


I wonder if regrets how she acted?
Nah probably not. She's fucking selfish.

I hate that I didn't have any experience with relationships throughout my teens and twenties, because now I'm far too old to not know what the fuck I'm doing. Why did she agree to go out with me? Why does she want to go out with me again? There's gotta be something wrong with her if she wants to go out with me. Maybe she doesn't actually like me in that way and just wants to be friends.

Maybe she wants to date me out of revenge? Or maybe it's insecurity again. Maybe she'll just leave me when she doesn't feel like she "has to" be with a guy like, like last time.

Why did she keep playing with her hair? The internet told me that's a sign she's interested, but she played with it a lot, so maybe she was just bored. Why did she keep doing that thing with her shoulders? There's nothing on the internet about someone doing that thing with their shoulders.

Hey, I have to look up what signals to look out for that she's interested on the internet, because I have no experience or frame of reference. That makes me feel great about myself.

I hate my job. I'm a teacher, and I feel like I'm being targeted by quite a number of my coworkers because I slighted one very influential one in a very mild way - told him that 10 pm is not an appropriate time to be bothering me about work, and that he should respect the boundaries between work and the rest of my life. Apparently this means I'm unreceptive to criticism, and I've felt like the administration has put a rather large target on my back since.

Hell, I had another coworker confront me in a hallway full of parents and teachers, puff up his chest, stick his finger in my face, and call me a jackass. He wanted to fight me, and he's more than 30 years my senior. I told him I have too much self respect, walked away, and reported the incident. I was told there's nothing the administration can do.

So yeah, I'm fucking done with it all. I'm waking up in the middle of the night pissed as all fuck because I don't have an appropriate outlet. To make matters worse, I moved across the country and don't really have any support network to speak of. I can't keep venting to the same three coworkers. It's not fair to them, even if they say they are all right with it.

I think I'm going to quit and move back home. I don't see myself having any other option at this point.

>>17513598
I fucked up on LSD at a festival and when round screaming is was god.

>>17513966
This is the point where you figure out who your school board member is. That goes by the district you live in, and then you send them a nice detailed email describing every incident that has occurred along with any documentation if you have it. If said board member does not address this with the superintendent to have a chit chat with the administration and get your problems resolved, then request to speak at the next board meeting where the minutes are recorded and open for the public to review.

>Trust me they will not want this to discussed publicly. Also, you are a taxpayer so contact your board member. Keep in mind board members love having happy teachers in their districts when it comes time for re-election.

>>17513966
Also, you should mention to the board member that you are considering contacting a lawyer, or just contact one before. The consultation is free usually and he or she will take your case without getting any payment until you get a settlement or win.

What you are experiencing is called workplace bullying, possibly harassment in terms of the law, and a hostile work environment. You need to stand up to them Op so they do not get away with doing this to other individuals. This is not acceptable or okay. They are educators that are supposed to be leading as an example for the students that will be entering college and the work force. If they cannot play the same rules in society then how in the fuck do they expect the students to do so? No, you have to stand up not just for yourself, and other faculty that has or will experience this bs, but for the sake of the students.

>http://www.lni.wa.gov/safety/research/files/bullying.pdf

>>17513598
I'm sick of working in this factory. Sometimes I just want to give up on society and turn to crime. Nothing violent but selling drugs would be a fucking cake walk. Either that or I'll just kill myself. Its not like I have any friends.

No se qué hacer con mi vida, si fuera por mi no saldría de mi casa. No tengo metas, si conozco a alguien interesante me asusto y soy condescendiente. No tengo idea de qué hago acá respondiendo en español porque nadie va a entenderme.

>>17513992
Boomtown? Shot in the dark but I was there recently and 80% of people were on something. MD, K and LSD seemed to be the most popular drugs.

I've been ghosted by the person I love and I can't stop thinking about about what I've must have done wrong. I want to die.

>>17514124
Oxytocin is just a molecule. The feelings you are experiencing are purely chemical. Once that fades you'll be able to see things clearly again and will no doubt come to the realization that there is always someone else out there ready to love you and hopefully by then, you'll be ready to love them too.

>>17514130
>Oxytocin is just a molecule
And is the hormone used to induce labor, and so has absolutely fuck all to do with what that guy's talking about.

>>17514136
Its also linked to trust, sexual drive, bonding. Its pretty much what your body uses to tell you you give a fuck about someone. Nobody has been able to fully explain what love is but this is pretty close. I guess if you wanted to argue semantics you could. I was just trying to explain that all feeling is purely chemical.

I still love you, Monica. I really do, with all my heart. Hope you can bring yourself to forgive me some day and we can go out and have a cup of tea. I don't really like tea.

Time to go

We begin with trust
And that means being trustworthy
We have the foundations of a beautiful, lasting relationship

You'll fuck me but you won't go out with me? I mean what the fuck, woman? Jesus. I don't understand. Its been 30 mins since you left. I still can't understand.

Yesterday all i wanted was to die, today i'm just unhappy; the rest of my life will be like this and it's despairing.

Stu Beggs died.

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You mother fuckers think think you can get catch me?

I've covered my tracks too well and about to go to ground.

As for the other cunt: You think you can outsmart me? Jokes, on you; from here on out I'm squeaky clean.

Even if you know I'm up to all kinds of shit, you'll never be able to prove it and I know that pisses you off to no end.

I just gotta wait until you're replaced.

>>17513905
Not that anon, but thanks for the link.

Fuck you Bart! I love you

I think my cousin wants my dick, what do i do /adv/? She's ugly and annoying af and I just want her to leave me alone.

I had a dream about you a little while ago. For some reason I was watching a weird body horror movie within the dream, but eventually it shifted to us sitting next to each other in my room and then sitting next to each other in a park. I had a blanket wrapped around myself and since it was cold, you snuggled up to me and I opened up the blanket to let you have some of it. I asked you if you had been sleeping okay this semester, and you said yes and leaned in even closer to me. I didn't know what to do and your cheek was right there, so I kissed it. You didn't really react to it, but you didn't pull away either.

Then you made a joke, a pun that somehow involved Will Smith and tacos. I can't remember what it was, but it made both of us start cracking up, just laughing our asses off. Then partway through it, while we were still laughing so hard, you just blurted out "I love you so much, Anon." And then we just started making out with the pent-up energy of people who have wanted to do this for years but haven't been able to. When it was over I started blabbering about how I never thought you had feelings for me that way and how this was like a dream come true. You looked at me with this knowing smile.

We started making plans to hang out, at your house or mine or going on a hiking trail together. That's when I realized I was dreaming, and I woke up. And now I'm here, feeling like shit because none of it was real. I guess I should have figured it out earlier from the way things keep repeating themselves, which always happens in my dreams, or how my dorm room transformed into a chilly park, or how your hair was cut way shorter than you actually wear it.

I want to be with you so badly it hurts. This dream was legitimately the happiest memory I have, even if it wasn't real.

Two hours ago I paid 70€ at a brothel to have sex with the hottest woman I've ever seen. But I came too fast while she sucked my cock durine 69. She told me she won two "trophies for oral sex" but I think she just said that so I wouldn't feel embarrassed about cumming too fast. I only blame myself, though. I should have gone to the cheaper brothel and paid 20€. Live and learn.

We are abroad again after a couples of months being back in our home country during summer holidays.

Boyfriend is sad and cries because he misses his mother. I feel distant about this and quite apathetic, I cut everything with my parents after the last and final episode of abuse occurred 3 months ago.
I feel disdain towards his feelings and cannot do much and pretend anything other than comforting him or telling him he can go home and stay with his mother.

>>17514322
She didn't even need the money

Idiot

>>17514359
Yeah I know, I fucked up. The worst part is that would have been 50 for a blow and sex but I wanted to 69 so I paid an extra 20. 70 euros to suck on her tits that were too hard and to 69. Bitch was built perfect, though. Would totally go back and put my dong in her puss for less money. For now, I'll stick to the semi-semi-illegal brothels for 20€ so I don't feel cheated.

>>17514382
I'm a woman, and I really need the money in this economy, and there's a man thinks I'm hot, but I won't even charge!

>>17514429
No woman thinks he is hot!

>>17514433
I didn't say I was talking about him

>>17514437
What were you talking about?

>>17514439
That he could get it free! And better quality

>>17514443
Oh you are a whore.
Who cares about what you think anyway...

>>17514077
lol existen personas aquí que hablan español. Buena suerte, anon. Recomiendo que empieces con algunas metas pequeñas, solo completando algunas cosas simple puede ayudarte a sentirse mejor de si mismo. El ejercicio me ayuda cuando estoy triste. No te rindas!

>>17514453
I'm not. That's the point *sigh*

PART 1:My gf of 5 months left me now exactly a month ago. (We talked flirted fucked hanged out for several more months before hand) She was obsessed with me wanted to get married run awayand everything. Bought me a very expensive and cheesy as shit thing out first anniversary. Showed so many signs she was madly in love with me etc... I was her first boyfriend. I didnt really feel it at first because there were some other girls in my life but i came to fall in love with her and only her. Theres been times where girls wanted me to cheat and I immediately refused because I never wanted to hurt her, it made my love feel strong as shit, we were incredibly close talking and seeing eachother at pretty unhealthy amounts i would imagine compared to the norm... She would blow my phone up if i didnt text her back every second but it wasnt really forcing i just got busy and what not. I still loved her obviously very much Ive been with many girls but she felt like the one.. But Once we started dating she became very controlling and obsessive making me send her pictures of where im at and constantly picking fights and arguments over insecurities until I started acting like a dick sometimes because it was so fucking much. She found out I was hanging out with a friend (female:() and smoking weed (literally thats it)and just lost her mind forsure calling me a liar and everything in the book. The night she broke up with me she said a lot of hurtful shit like purposefully abusive. Part of the hate being that she agrees with her family that she shouldnt be with me at all (we are different races and were definetely very different backgrounds.).I didnt beg or plead for more than like 20 minutes but I did go to her house the day after and left roses on her door. This made her mad as fuck and she blew up my phone over it saying hurtful shit so i just said fuck you stop talking too me out of my anger.

>>17514532
PART 2: then She got with another guy like a week after but now theyre broke up and it hasnt even been 3 weeks? She also messages that same girl asking about me but im blocked on everything and she never directly contacted me. I also never saw the message the girl just mentioned that she was asking about me but Its been at least 4 or 5 weeks without talking to me? I feel like i dont believe it im so paranoid at this point maybe my friend sees how much it hurts me even though i never mentioned it and thought it would make me feel better? i say this because she asks me about her a lot for some reason its like she senses i still think about her but idk how.. I love her more than anything and even though other girls like me and want to hang out etc I literally cannot find it in myself to do it. Its so hard to move on harder than ever before... I wake up before school every morning and cry my eyes out because i miss her so fucking much. Anons is there any chance of her coming back? Im not talking like even about dating, i just mean do you think she will contact me? or she hates me too much? :( Should i give more details? Im not a very open person and I just want some closure from you guys because im confused and hurt.

I hope someone responds ty for listening to my retarded rant

>>17514528
If i ever kill myself it will be your fault.
You are as confusing as the messages the aliens give me...

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>>17513598
I'd love to kill the boyfriend of the girl I'm in love with

Just stab him several times, like in horror movies.

Of course I won't do it because I'm not nuts, but I'd love to.


He's a motherfucking retard, he has the brain of a 12 years old, and he's a total misfit. The kind of retarded faggot that has problems because his parents have too much money and didn't want him.

But she loves him because she's young and she doesn't know shit, he's incredibly good looking, has a big penis, and he's rich as fuck.

Life is unfair and the world is shit. If only I met her before she met him I bet I would be in his place.

Fuck everything

>>17514532
>>17514539
If anyone wants a more condensed/concise version of this post in order to have an easier time responding just let me know because i know its kind of long. I just want the most accurate answer because I have no idea whats going to happen... I assume the worst :(

>>17514600
"Bitch is crazy" and "get away from her" is all you have to listen to.

>>17514608
I knew she was but ive never seen her act like this before. Its like she finally has some self control and can maintain the distance. It scares the fuck out of me because i cant imagine us being apart forever like this... I mean I can see youre looking out for me but I honestly just want to know if she'll come back. :(

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(I posted this in the last thread)
A and R,

Why the hell did you guys legit fucking ditch me? Did I do something? Everything seemed totally fine and then you guys suddenly delete me. This situation is torturing me and I just want things to go back to normal. Big bros, please come back. I love you guys, no matter what.

Your Lil Sis,
M

>>17514630
>:(
You are still immature, don't go back.
>>17514634
You sound sketchy desu

>>17514644
I wish i had the chance to go back.. Thank you for your time though

>>17514644

Sketchy?

>>17514655
Of course you do, if you thought things through, were mature or had more self-respect you wouldn't be in this situation.
That's how abusive relationships start: one side doesn't have self-love and accept anything just to be with the idea of a girl this person doesn't even love but thinks it's love.

>>17514676
Yeah, it looks like you did something for them to abandon you but can't accept it in your head.
Idk just a gut feeling.

>>17514683
There were no fights or anything before this, as I said, everything seemed normal then this happened

>>17514687
Seems weird for 2 close friends abandon the 3rd without notice, obviously something happened.

>>17514678
Ive thought about it a lot. I feel like I can deal with her I can handle her I can make it work. Shes crazy but its not the extreme crazy. Shes not crazy enough to where I can sit there and say shes not worth it. Trust me when I say I love myself very much. Im pretty successful in almost everything i do (although clearly not here) and Ive never had depression issues or anything, if thats what you mean. Ive been with many girls but I actually see something with her like legitimate reasons for why we are pretty perfect for one another... so i think, so she thought... I could go on further but I feel like its unnecessary. Honestly i completely understand that it would be an unhealthy decision to let her continue to act the same way with us dating, I just want to know if it seems realistic for her to come back at all... Im constantly paranoid about it. I distract myself with my work but fuck sometimes Its very hard to not just sit there and wonder if she'll come back...

YOU NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT!!!

Every morning I wake up for my fucking 8am class, and am greeted by the sight of you, sprawled out atop your blankets, legs wide in the air, scratching at the vile chub-rub rash between your legs. It makes me nauseous. I've lost 8 lbs in 2 weeks since moving in with you because your eating habits and appearance cause me to lose my appetite. You are the filthiest, fattest, most disgusting roommate I could have asked for.

I wish you would just die so I could stop having to deal with being around you. If I ever said any of this to your face I'd get kicked out of university for hate speech. Fuck you.

>>17514696

I think they may have abandoned me over an OTP that they hated, as in they once said that they would ditch anyone who liked it. The last message I got from one of them was them asking me how I felt about that ship. I think they misread it because I said I didn't like it. As you can see, this whole situation is fucking retarded, and has left me extremely confused

The social media backlash surrounding DOAX3 VR is a depressing reminder that the whole point of 'social justice' on the internet is to give privileged white women and the guys trying to sleep with them a direct channel to haze awkward nerds.

>>17514703
If this is true you have to have better people in your life.
>>17514700
More than half of what you said doesn't have anything to do with it.
You have a lot to grow but i won't try to force it to you.

>>17514716
Yeah I really dont understand it I guess. I constantly play le macho man role so i never really figure much out about conventional relationship wisdom via talking with others.

I found your Chaturbate account. I'm so disgusted. Paying these fat whores money just to see a boob flash or a crotch shot, did you have no self control? These fatass girls who think they look so cute with their rolls and smelly ass fupas. Did you not have standards? I want to vomit, fuck.

>>17513598
I know this probably means nothing to you, but to me I feel the happiest I've been a while. You asked me to go do something with you. Me? I feel really giddy.

>>17514716

They're good guys, sometimes they do retarded things, but they've been there for me when I needed them and I did my best to do the same for them. I tried to contact one of them a different way and got no response, there is one other way I could possibly do it. Idk, it's hanging over my head and I've been searching across boards for ways of venting and coping

>>17514808
Idk this is very weird, good luck.

>>17514838
Yeah it's quite a strange situation, thank you.

>>17513598
I fucked up.

I was looking at porn of pregnant women, and among some of the searches were some really fucked up pictures of pregnant children. I was expanding my Bing search on pregnant women, and, for what reason, I don't fucking know, I accidentally typed in "kid" instead of "woman." Must have been something subconscious when I saw some of those horrible thumbnails, I don't even look for shit like that, ever.

Jesus Christ, that gave me a scare. I clicked out immediately (thankfully, no pictures seemed to turn up on that one specific search) but shit, man. If my history is searched, I hope they see I was searching for older women a few pages before I typed that.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

>>17514864
How long were you on the page where you typed kids?

>>17514874
Could not have been more than five-ten seconds before I reread my own text and clicked out. There are at least five pages where I searched for Bing images of older women.

Didn't click on any of the fucked up images or any single thing on the wrong-type page, either.

>>17514882

Calm down, shit like that happens sometimes. Like one time I did an image search from a funny pic on here and the search bar said "Loli" and I exited out as fast as I could. you were only on there a few seconds, so you're fine. If you were ever searched I think they would be able to determine that. Don't worry, and be careful next time, ok?

>>17514864
I like my porn like I like my history.

disabled

>>17514894
That's a relief. I don't even report CP links anymore because I'm so scared of being involved in the eyes of the law.

Thank you.

>>17514895
You're a funny one.

>>17514908

I'm glad I could help, anon

For that insult, of all insults possible, I promise I will return it

I'm incredibly depressed right now.

I feel so terribly alone. The people that I've met that actually do care about me live halfway across the country away from me and even now it is starting to feel like they really only care because they feel responsible for me because we're in the same fraternity (which makes things worse desu).

I don't have a gf right now, even though I've been out on a couple of dates with some people, and I'm just starting to feel like everything that I do isn't worth it anymore. It feels like what little efforts I put into improving my life have increasingly diminishing returns and that makes it harder to function.

I'm currently in my bed, haven't really gotten out of it at all, and just hoping that something good will happen right now. I don't really have the energy to make something good happen, which speaks to how my depression is affecting me.

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>>17514936

I know how it feels to be insecure about friends, I'm sorry you feel like that. But for good things to happen, you gotta get out of bed, and use your energy to go through the day. You have to do something in order for good things to come. You could get a hobby to make you happy also. For right now, please get out of that bed, and maybe go for a walk.

>>17514950
I'll give that a try, will update when I get back

>>17514956
Ok, I'll be here

I fucking hate this life. I never had any family or friends. Never talk to anyone. Nobody. I am fucking alone. all I do is work in a job I hate and the only enjoyment I get from this hell is either food or shitposting. My only joy comes from this retarded weeaboo image board, food and masturbating. I will die a kissless virgin who never ever loved anything nor was ever loved. I have brain problems im sure. I'm fucking tired, when will this change?

So... Im really disgusted by dicks. Can't give a proper blowjob without feeling like throwing up, which sucks considering that I have a bf whom I like.
Vaginas on the other hand do look tasty, so I think I might have a thing for girls? But I thought you knew whether you were gay or straight .. And I always assumed I was straight. I just put it of as "slightly interested" but now I can't even satisfy my bf even though he goes down on me.
Even when browsing through /soc/ and looking at dickpics i feel disturbed how ugly dicks look. They look like a worm coming out of the tomb, sometimes with veins and by the mere picture I can imagine the disgusting smell that comes of it.... So.... I guess I might have a problem.

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>>17515012

I can somewhat relate. The idea of giving a blowjob is very unpleasant to me. I wouldn't want my mouth near that. But if a guy wanted to go down on me, I would tell him I don't do that, so he doesn't feel let down. I'm straight, but I think I would rather eat a pussy than suck a dick

Is it possible to come to terms with a lot of horrible shit I did in my past?

>>17513598
Cest la vie nigger

>>17515083

Yeah, sometimes talking about it helps, because you're confronting it

I thought it was my fault the relationship ended but it wasn't. I tried more than I should have. He didn't try at all.

>>17515096
Some of the shit is so horrible that I could never imagine saying it to another person.

I wouldn't even know where to start. I just can't take this constant regret playing on an endless loop in my head.

>>17515129
You got me skeptic, tell me one horrible thing you done.

>>17515129

You could start with the biggest regret and go down the line, or star with the smallest

>>17515140
>>17515144

I've beat a couple women and generally treated them very poorly.

Killed a couple animals or abused them.

Those are my biggest ones. I'm not gonna make any excuses.

Ladies, men are fucking pigs... cheat first before they cheat on you, then you can always have the upper hand when he feels so "guilty" (yeah right) he has to confess.

>>17515177
Do the opposite of what you did. Treat the women you love with respect and patience. Give an animal a loving home, and care for it. You're in a good direction right now, because you realize what you did was wrong.

i just realized today when talking with a friend i cannot imagine things in my head. i did some more research and i found out this is called aphantasia.
i had a small mental breakdown when i realized most people can mentally visualize shit, i always thought it was a metaphor.

>>17515234

What do you mean? You can't picture things? Like, if I said "Imagine a street vendor selling dildoes" you can't see the picture in your head?

>>17515184
2/10 bait, made me respond

>>17515239
cant see it
when my mom told me i should "count sheep" when trying to fall asleep as a kid, i didnt understand what she was talking about

>>17515243
>when my mom told me i should "count sheep" when trying to fall asleep as a kid, i didnt understand what she was talking about

Well that's just autism anon. Am impressed you can't see dildoes though

>>17515246
no man, i literally cannot picture anything in my head. i can only think with words

>>17515193
Is there anything I can do to make it right? I think that's the only way this will stop.

>>17515257

I don't think you can make it right with those specific animals and people, they most likely have moved on, and it wouldn't be a good idea to contact those women.

>>17514966
Just got back from a nap and a walk. Afraid it didn't really help as it started to rain while I was walking, but I guess that's the way of things.

I am indeed feeling a little better though, so I do appreciate the suggestion. Now I just need a way to fix this crushing loneliness that I'm experiencing.

I just got my job review results and I got average and below average scores. I didn't completely bomb, which I'm glad, but I still feel really disappointed in my self because I made some stupid mistakes. I'm very hard on myself, so if I don't get all above average, I feel that sinking stomach feeling.

This job is really important to me, so I'm worried about next month. I'm trying to be positive, some people did worse than me, so I can only improve from here (I hope).

>>17515276

Don't worry man. Most people are average at their job, that's what makes it the average. I wouldn't worry too much but just try harder in all things. The only thing you can do is try your best.

>>17514702
Can't you get a new roommate or something or move out

>>17515270
I guess the only way to even start is by being a better human. Thank you for not being judgemental.

>>17515305
we're all gonna make it anon

>>17513598
I want a life that is 180* opposite of where I am now.

I attract negativity into my life. I do as I want and it causes issues with people whom I then push away for attempting to change how I live.

Pretty much I wish I could do what I want if it improves myself. I want to be autonomous and independent but dont have the resources to do so. I can only imagine how great it would be. my family loves me but I need to escape them.

Also I dont want to be addicted but I also dont want to feel depressed all the time. And I know what happens when I get sober even for years. I turn to suicide when all the medicines and doctors fail and then get back on substances and herbs and feel better again but am chastised for it.

I moved from the midwest to the east coast for 7 months to distance myself from a girl. I had just turned 18, graduated from high school early, and decided I'd take a chance and be with some friends who moved here.

I ended up developing some serious feelings for this one art hoe piece of shit slut who expressed interest but bailed a week ago or so.

and now i'm moving back again Monday because my mom's supposed to die in three weeks and I'm scared about what to do for college or who to live with or what I'm doing for a job in the meantime. I've made some great memories up here. I'm scared to move back, I don't want to end up regretting it.

>>17515234
>>17515250
This is very interesting, since it seems to be the opposite of the tendency towards more abstract and visual thought (and corresponding deficit in verbal processing) that comes with the genes that also increase schizophrenia-spectrum disorder risk.

If you go get a genetic report (eg 23andMe and plug that into promethease) you may find that you're carrying a lot of the opposite genes, that are tagged as "protective" against such disorders.

Obviously there's much more literature out there on the former group, since the schizo disorders are such a big public health burden, but i'd be very interested to see what happens to the people on the extreme end of the opposite side. Is this a case where that predisposes you to other disorders or problems, meaning moderation is best, or where the "ideal healthiest human" is as far on that side as possible?

>>17515184
They are
Or people are pigs. May as well soften the iron grip a bit. Go poly.

>>17515369

How can anyone truly love multiple people, if they have this much trouble with just one?

Now you're home, please don't go down there
please stay with me
I can't deal with the complete heartbreak every day. And I'm trapped here without you if you're gone
I have my hobbies and anyway, you're still my whole world

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i'm in a crappy place right now because the man i am in love with just moved to another country. we've been FWB for years, he's made it pretty clear that he doesn't harbor romantic feelings for me and that it's just a sex thing, but sometimes he'll act differently (take me out to movie, hanging out without banging, etc.).

i'm not looking for solutions, just complaining. sucks to catch the feels for someone unattainable, both emotionally and physically.

I cut myself last night. I couldn't even tell you why. I was a few drinks deep and pining over lost loves and regrets etc., etc., and noticed my glass had a crack in it. It was easy enough to snap a piece off, and easier to drag it across my arm.

There was no moment of "the pain made me feel something even if it hurt" moment. In fact it didn't feel like anything (thanks, whiskey) but I kept doing it and watching the blood form into dark beads.

I'm not even anywhere close to the demographic that you normally hear about doing this sort of stuff. I've dealt with my temporary waves of depression in the past, but never like this. At least I have a physical job so I can attribute the marks to general scrapes I get on a daily basis. But I keep looking at them and thinking "what now?"

>>17513892
I'm kind of feeling the same way. I want to fall in love again, and I want to be made love to and all those great other things, but the fact that it'll be with another guy and not my ex disgusts and saddens me. Still being in love with your ex sucks, especially when you know you want to move on.

>>17514751
>they think they look so cute

Obviously if your man is enjoying looking at these fat whores, then they are.

You gotta remember that difference is what lures the man to cheat. This is why chads occasionally slide down to do some whaling.

Fuck me, now I'm hungry for some pork.

>>17513598
as many here I lost the woman I love
we were suppose to get married
it all went to shit
its been half a year and I am still not over it. I was doing really well but then spiraled out of control over the last 3 months. all confidence and alpha male in me gone. I have a fucking amazing life just have to live it without the woman I love. the person I called home. the person who I never had to pretend or be someone I am not.

I don't feel well. I haven't felt well for days.

I need you in my bed soon
Did you return my love?

>>17515443
tell me about it. what kind of wellness? Emotional, physical, mental?

Gonna chug my pills tonight, purposefully going to the whole bottle and embrace death's sweet embrace.

>>17515495
Please don't

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I'm 30. My longest relationship lasted 6 months. I was very in love with her and she threw me away like garbage because I'm insecure and immature. My social skills are horribly lacking, i usually get two or three dates before a woman realizes I'm basically retarded. It feels like my life will be empty and cold, just like how its been up until now. Can't bring myself to suicide because I would hurt the ones who love me. Ive thought about suicide almost every day for over a decade.

>>17515503
Sorry, this is happening. I'm just exhausted and honestly it's not worth putting up with stuff anymore. Thanks for your concern though.

>>17515495
Pills are not very effective. Try pills plus jumping from a bridge so drowning may not hurt much.

>>17515516
That'd require effort, I'm good with two bottles.

>>17515512
Please try. Seek happiness from doing what you care about

>>17515520
Don't really care about doing anything. I've felt numb, nothing for months now.

I guess these looks he's been giving me don't mean a thing and he's probably got other options in mind, I think he's single but I don't know! I just want to know if he's genuinely interested in a relationship, I don't have time for games and being misleaded..

>>17515519
Good luck then, because if you survive it will hurt a lot.

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>>17515534

>>17515531
Depression, for which help is available. You're not alone, and you can get better

>>17515539
I don't want to get better, I just want it over.

>>17515545
It being over, is getting better. Please don't take your life. Change your life

>>17515548
I've made peace with it, it's fine really.

I'm never playing with you again.
You fucking act like you know everything with your +3000h of playtime and yet most of the time you play way worse than me and I don't have a third of that time!
Also, if you wanna know shit about me, ask me! Don't go fucking asking other people.
Also judging by the way you talked to me when I was being polite, it's no wonder that at the age of 42 you still haven't found anyone and have to lie and say you're in your 30s.

>>17515689
What game?

She never cared about me. She just felt sorry for me. I don't know why I still keep thinking about her every day.

>I used to jerk off to CP and animal abuse
>I abused all kinds of drugs because I wanted to escape life
>I never had any sort of romantic relationship in my life even though I'm good at making friends
>I want to commit suicide but know not existing is worse
>had IQ of 128, went to shit because of said drug abuse
>just want a special someone

Can't you hear me calling for you? ?
You keep your commodity next to me
I know you're the one
You make me feel safe and happy
all I need

I am useless. I am trying to get myself into a routine of doing something, anything productive every day. I wasted away 3 years of my college time in a long distance relationship that I didn't know how to balance. Even without the relationship I probably wouldn't have known how to balance everything anyway. This last year I envisioned should have been me finally going out and making friends and learning practical shit so I'm not fucked career wise (I'm Computer Science/Engineering). Not that I didn't make friends--none of them feel very fulfilling and it seems like most people have already settled into their circles of friendship. That's okay, maybe just haven't found the people yet. So I more or less set myself up for disappointment--that's on me so whatever.

I've started lifting weights and going to the gym the past month and a half in an actual concentrated effort to get /fit/. The sense off accomplishment from that now being part of the routine has pretty much worn off. It's an improvement, but I still spend the rest of the day in bed seemingly unable to do anything.

I don't feel joy from playing video games very much any more. Common thing that happens to people, so that's okay; it just sucks. I guess I'm bitter from having sunk 1.5k+ hours into Dota across those first 3 years of college anyway. Even now I'm trying to learn to cook well enough so that I can sustain being /fit/. I can't even get myself to try making anything, let alone learn enough so that I won't just stop eating for several days on end--lord knows I've done that enough times already, even in the past year.

I initially blamed all this on depression: the failed relationship, the withdrawing from school after a near-suicide attempt, the lack of social fulfillment. After the medication, the therapy, the partial hospitalization, I hate the thought of just brushing this off as "I'm depressed." It's a cop out. It's not me.

I just never learned to balance things. I never grew up.

This guy surprised me by coming onto me hard, and I didn't expect it somehow
I've really fallen for him, and not sure how to cope

>>17515273
I'm glad I could help. Also, pets can help with lonelyness

How long does fast food stay good if it's left out?

>>17514597
Wait, hold up, you are saying if you were in his place you would magically have a lot of money and grow a penis? Let that shit go man, because I bet she would have dumped you for him anyways.

>>17515767
What did he do?

I'm addicted to Adderall, and it's the only thing that keeps me going in my life right now.

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PG13 first world problem but need an outlet so fuck it.<br>
I&apos;m 28, probably 6/10, happily married for two years, been together for seven. <br>
Visit family for sisters bday alone while wife stays home. Sister&apos;s 9/10 friend comes to visit and we end up hitting the town just the three of us. I buy drinks all night and me and sisters friend really hit it off, she&apos;s all over me by the end of the night (even turning down several better looking alphas). Luckily sisters friend goes home with sister and i go back to parents house as we all knew we would&apos;ve done something stupid if we were on our own. I grew up with zero gf&apos;s in my teens (family actually thought i was gay until I met wife) so this was the the first time I&apos;d really connected with (and pulled) not just a girl but an absolute worlder so ego and self esteem are at an all time high. Couple of days pass and I head back home to wife but sisters friend is on my mind 100% of the time. I text her a couple of times just to check she had a good night and swap a bit of banter and she immediately texts back asking when I&apos;m next visiting and if I&nbsp; want to go out again. I left it at that but i still can&apos;t stop thinking about her. Obviously I don&apos;t want to do anything stupid like cheat on my wife but I&apos;m aware how easily a bit of innocent flirting can quickly escalate if I see her again and get slightly too drunk around her. What&apos;s a husband to do /adv/?

I'm 29 and in a relationship that is going nowhere. He doesn't want to have a family with me and won't break up with me and we have been in this relationship for the last 12 years. I feel like it is too late to start a good relationship and have a family with someone else...did I fail? should I stay with him and never have a family?

>>17513831
Are you seriously pining after a girl you haven't talked to/had little contact with for 6+ years? She probs doesn't remember you. It was middle school man get over it.

>>17515875
You can still start a new relationship and get married. You're not that old. A lot of women are waiting to have children mid 30s, and you can always adopt. Not wanting to have a family is a dealbreaker for a lot of people. Don't let him hold you back from starting a family, you will grow to really resent him

I'm starting to hate my job a bit.
I go to work early, I work my 40 hours a week, I sometimes stay late or go in on my day off if I have to, and all around I've been told that I'm doing a good job and I'm helping out my employers.
But for some reason, I just feel like if I wasn't there things would be about the same.
It's probably really retarded for me to take my job seriously because I work in fast food only as a bottom tier worker but on the other hand because I do work in fast food as a low rank chump I can easily be replaced the day after I leave or something.
I guess I just want to feel needed or something and I'm not having much luck with that in regards to my home life or with my friends so I just need some sort of purpose.
I guess I can't really find that feeling of self-worth at a fast food joint, can I?

>>17515871
You move the fuck on. This isn't hard, you get over it. Spice up your sex life, get in shape with your wife. Or you get a divorce and try the "greener" side that is actually probably brown. Grow up.

>>17515029
Well.. He did say by himself that he loves to give oral and doesnt particullary like to recieve (without me mentioning that I don't want to)
I hope he meant it as he said, because apart from that our sex is well matched in terms of our preferences
I still feel sort of guilty though that I'm disgusted by the mere thought of going down on him... This just doesn't feel normal .. It's not his fault, even a Christiano Ronaldo dick would disgust the hell out of me.. Would totally love to like the smell and feel at least sexually attracted to that piece of meat - I just can't.. I don't mind being fucked vaginally or anal - heck I even like it .. Just oral...

You make me feel amazing, as if I won a love lottery I don't even play. Please be true

I texted you over 4 hours ago. What the fuck is your fucking problem? Why do you flipflop between being so nice to me and then pulling this shit?

please can i just die now. i fucking hate this life. im not getting anywhere and i have no way to get anywhere. infact im just living to work and die. there is nothing for me here

I regret not having the talent to sing opera. I really would love to be able to do that.

>>17515918

Maybe you two should talk about it, it may be awkward but you're voicing what you think.

i havent technically broken up with my gf, but i feel like its coming. it started off with her saying she wants to "talk less" because she doesnt have much to talk about, but all i can think is that she has plenty to talk about, just with someone else....
i cant help it, this summer has been perfect for me i cant see where it went wrong. i mean sure there are some weeks where we dont talk much but after this short period things go back to normal. the past 2 weeks we had very little communication, either texts me once a day, or none at all. why would she tell me not to worry/overthink it if its this bad? she even said she wanted to watch a movie sometime last week but with very little texting going on it was hard to talk to her about it. almost as if shes avoiding it, who would do such a thing? its one thing to break up with someone, but its even worse if you lead them to believe things are fine.

i gotta stop before i ramble non stop... i just dont know what to do, if this keeps going on i have to confront her, but even that might not do anything

i can literally write an essay on this shit, infact id share the notepad file of the things i write down but its way too autistic and incoherent, i also repeat myself alot in it

thought i was going to ask my crush out today

but then we got lunch and it turns out we have absolutely no chemistry, and if it weren't for our mutual friends, we almost certainly wouldn't be friends at all

we couldn't even talk for 15 minutes without lots of awkward pauses

I'm so frustrated with my life. There's no point in asking for advice, because nothing ever helps and I know what I'm supposed to do already, because I've read thousands of articles, books and comments telling this and that. The thing is other people can't do things for me, I have to make the change myself. But I don't know how to just DO IT. My mind is like stuck in a loop of doom.

I want to connect with someone, but I feel so alone in this world. People either just ignore me or don't really understand or care enough. Being ignored is the worst. I feel like I might just as well be alone in an empty room shouting at walls.

>>17513598
After having so long without a relationship and starting to lose trust in people i meet someone i actually enjoy being with and i decide to start something, eventually i guess i wasnt good enough and she broke up with my in the excuse that its because of problems within her family and that we should be friends, i believed her because im an idiot with no experience in women and decide to continue being her friend, and she keeps treating worse and worse little by little. Emotionally manipulating me even if im the person that has cared the most about her today she blocked me randomly and keeps treating me indifferently when i see her at work. Im done, im not that much of an idiot. im cutting all contacts with her, im not a toxic person and i have treated her incredibly well inspite of all the shit she has done, if she wants to manipulate someone else then fine but it had gotten to a point where i was cosidering suicide but thankfully i had a really good friend help me.

I dont need specific advice, i just wanted to vent and im sorry if i sound like an autistic beta sperg

I love you so much please let's not fight anymore.

>>17515954
Hey dude i know exactly how you feel and my best and honest advice is wherever you go the most search for someone of your same sex and talk to them, see if you enjoy their company and if you do then become friends without any romantic implications and after a while of building trust you will have a friend to voice your problems and to chill with.

Kek, I just made a fucking tinder. What a weird thing.

Man if only you guys knew how small your problems actually are, the only guy who could save humanity is someone I wouldn't even trust with my nail clippings and I actually feel like he might just let it all burn

>>17516015
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7Bd3iJSFyE

>>17515929
Stop being so clingy, maybe they're busy or whatever. The world does not revolve around you.

I WANT CASUAL SEX DAMNIT

I'M NOT READY FOR A RELATIONSHIP I JUST WANNA GET MY FUCKING DICK WET

GODDAMNIT

>>17516031
I don't see the appeal in casual sex

I feel like I'm good with girls, seeing as I got 3 numbers in the past month, and that I'm at least mildly attractive, but I feel like I just can't connect with them at all. I feel like most of them just like the complete opposite of what I like, don't share the same aspirations, etc. I just don't feel like I can connect with them and I feel like if I commit to them I'm just going to be sad or ruin the relationship.

Am I just looking for girls in all the wrong places?

Basically, I just broke up with my long distance gf about a week or so ago because she hadn't messaged me in about 3 weeks, among other things. Recently, I met this amazing girl, looks really cute, meets and exceeds all of my standards, etc. Basically the perfect girl for me. The only problem is that she has a boyfriend. She said that if and when they break up she'll go out with me. And this boyfriend is a bit of a shithead. They've been dating for 2 months, and within a few weeks of then dating, he cheated on her. Of course, she forgave him and they moved on. As it happens, he's going into the military soon, and he'll be pretty far away for 5 years. She tells me she wants to break up with him because of long distance and military stress, but she still "loves him". How do I convince her to break up with him without seeming like I'm trying to break them up? Should I do that? Or should I just wait it out and let it run its course? I don't know what to do, guys, I'm so lonely. I haven't had a proper girlfriend in years. I haven't even hooked up with anyone. I'm still a virginfag, and this is quite possibly a way to not end up a wizard

I hate being lonely but at the same time i like it.
i feel like im destined to suffer and be depressed as fuck . since i dont know what to do with my fucking life i feel like im going to die in a year or so i cant take this bullshit anymore

>>17516045
You don't break them up and realize what she's doing to him is what she will do to you. Who knows, maybe being a shithead might work for you

>>17516045
You're just s much of a shithead as he is. You're asking for advice on how to break up a couple, regardless of what he did, knowing she still loves him. You aren't asking for her sake, you're just asking because you want a girlfriend and to lose your virginity. You're fucking selfish

>>17516039
It's really just about getting your rocks off and someone finding you attractive enough to let you plow them like a fresh fucking field despite having no real relationship. Sex just beats the ever loving shit out of masturbating three times a day. My libido is so high it's a fucking curse.


Best case scenario would be FWB because then there's a friendship on top of that and FWB friendships (outside of the sex) are the most fun, you have great chemistry and get along great, just in a different way than an actual relationship, and neither of you are actually tied down and can keep pursuing your own interests but they're always there when you feel like getting hammered and rutting like animals in the back seat in a parking lot

>>17516060
I don't deny that. I'm a selfish dick, and I accept that. I didn't ask you to point out the obvious, anon. I never said I wasn't a shithead.
>>17516057
Yeah, I don't really want to break them up so much as make her realize that he's probably just going to cheat on her again, and that he's just a giant asshole.

>>17516072
I mean, he's already cheated on her once, and he's going to the bay area of California. Lots of cute women to fuck, and it would be so easy, she wouldn't even know!

>>17516045
How would you feel if you finally got said chick and after a while she's talking behind your back, telling other guys that she'd be with them if she wasn't with you?
What goes around comes around.

>>17516081
Good point. I'm just too lonely to care, though. My crippling depression and anxiety get in the way of most relationships, and she really seems to care a lot about me

>>17516026
I don't think I'm in the wrong for being upset about cutting off a conversation and then disappearing for 5 hours without taking one minute to give so much of a "hey I can't talk for the rest of the night" or something

>>17516112
Hey, I can't talk for the rest of the night

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>>17516089
I would wait it out then, even though it'll probably kill you. I wouldn't push her to break up but give her the vibes that "if it feels right, then do it"

>>17516117
Fuck off, you're not the person I want to hear that from.

>>17516126
It's time to just accept what you're given

>>17516122
That's what I've been doing, and will continue to do. Thank you for the advice.

>>17516132
What I'm given is a situation I don't know how to handle, a girl I don't know how to make progress with, and constant invasive thoughts that I should just give up now.

I can't hold on to a job. I graduated High School awhile ago but I don't want to touch college with a 10 foot pole, hearing all the debt horror stories. I have a deep interest in Architecture and would like to pursue it, but I know I can't. Can't drive, grades are poor, and it's, from what I hear, a very competitive environment in which my low self-esteem will murder me.

I'm not comfortable with trades either. The fact that I can't drive is still a problem, and I am also a weak person who cannot labor for more than 3 hours before giving out. I work too slow and I'm too clumsy otherwise.

My parents keep getting angry at me for sitting at home, indecisive. Putting pressure on me to make a choice even though I can't even formulate a good decision. They're aware that I don't plan on moving out in years - renting is a waste of money and I'm nowhere near being able to afford to buy property.

I've been cursed with Autism - I feel like my natural sperginess will shit on my attempts to move forward. I'm too much of a coward to commit suicide either.

I literally have no idea what to do but sit and wait, and everyone around me just gets angrier and angrier with me over it.

I slept with my best friend's wife's best friend. She's in a shit marriage, her hubby is a narcissist asshole (I met him once, he was an asshole on his best behaviour) who has cheated on her many times. My wife has cheated on me at least once.
I don't love my lover (other than as a human), and I hated hearing about her relationshit. It started as hugs, went to some light kissing, touching, and then we both kinda just said fuck it.

>>17515880
Lol no, its an off your chest thread. I saw her on fb and went, "fuck she prob liked me".

I shaved today and I keep not recognizing myself in the mirror.
Who is this child?
Oh it's me.

I'm almost 30 and I look so adolescent.

The other day I started thinking of a girl I went to school with but never really spoke to. She has been working overseas this last year. I Really wanted to speak to her, but thought it would be too weird to just message her. So tonight I go to a bar and chances has it that she got back yesterday, recognised me and we had a good first conversation. I Don't believe in fate, but this is pretty weird.

I'm too much of a pussy to ask a girl out and idk what to do. I hate myself. I really do.

>>17514634

Guys I'm thinking of trying to contact one of them again, I want to fix whatever the issue is, as in I want everything to go back to the way it was. I don't know if it's a good idea, but I feel like it's the right thing to do.

wow, flirting is fun, I didn't realize it was that easy. but now I'm getting too horny at work, I hope the girl that keeps giving me the fuck eyes actually wants to fuck

>>17516056
how many people have you cut out of your life now anon?

I've been searching over a few boards for help with my situation, sorry if anyone is annoyed with it. I just feel really alone and I'm having trouble accepting it

I want to talk with a Christian.
A true believer.

I keep seeing Christianity in my studies.
I mean shit, you can't study Euro history without being immersed it.
But I've never talked to a Christian. A real one.

I was raised "atheist". Well, not really, but my parents told me to choose when I was an adult. So naturally I "chose" atheism.

I want to talk to a proper Christian. A real devout one.
Not to attack them or anything.
I love the messages the religion extols.
Christ is a beautiful figure.

I'm attracted to it and want to talk about it.

>>17516595
Go to a church and ask a minister about their faith, I'm sure they'd be more than happy to talk extensively about it.

They might try to get you to convert though so be prepared to deflect that.

t. raised Christian became atheist

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I think there's something alive in my lower stomach. It's been 7 months since this shit started and I don't know what to do. I thought I could handle it, and it spiraled out of control. I don't mean to sound like a whiny bitch, but why am I having so many problems at once? FUCK.

>Captcha: Signs, that say X-ray and Ultrasound

>>17516612
>hey doc i came for a consult

>>17516595

Just go, I think hinduism is pretty cool, but eating only fish and rice is a deal breaker for me, and the whole poo in loo thing.

but khsrna is fucking badass

>>17516630
Aloo and chicken is delicious though

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>>17516628

I had to go to a, I guess, mini hospital about 2 weeks ago, they didn't notice anything abnormal while the doctor felt my stomach (checking appendix)

>>17515869
Lower dosages?

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I'm outgrowing 4chan, but everyplace else on the internet is boring as fuck. don't really care for reddit - I'll read a thread there if it shows up as a search result and looks relevant, but that's about it. the blogosphere has been a wasteland for years. tried reading news but it's just a bunch of depressing shit that I can't do anything about. nothing on the internet is interesting anymore, but I don't really want to leave the internet. not sure what to do. it's not healthy but I keep coming back to 4chan and feeling more and more out of place as I get older and the userbase gets younger.

i've had such a shitty time of it lately. i don't know what to do with myself lately. i'm lonely all the fucking time. my dog died today and i don't know how to deal with it proper. i knew all day and i thought about it and i was painfully aware but it didn't hit me until i saw her grave.
it's been 265 days since she talked to me and even though i've had people since then she still left the longest lasting impression because she was fucking perfection and i squandered it away
i don't even know how many times i've posted in these fucking threads and nobody probably reads my posts anyway
my friends left me because i don't smoke or drink, they weren't my friends anyway i guess but i have nobody to talk to
i'm so alone, and i'm trying to improve it, i'm trying to get out and talk to people and make friends and have conversations and have company and give back what i take, but goddamn if it isn't giving me a hard time.
i'm ugly as sin and that definitely doesn't help my case, /fa/ be damned
i may be a little bitter

Just in a rut of despair, self-loathing and loneliness. I want to either figure it out or die.
I hate feeling this way. I hate coming back to this every couple weeks. What haven't I figured out, what have I done wrong, how do I fix this, I just want to stop feeling this way.

>>17516654
I would insist on it desu

have to take speed, because shitty health care system doesn't recognize ADD and have no CNS stimuli as medication. Everyone is using speed to party like wild animals, I use it to study a.k.a. function like a normal human being with the attention span longer than 2 seconds. I don't understand how nobody gave a shit when I was struggling so hard at school, I was always "the lazy underachiever" and when I did work, "I obviously didn't work enough because I'm a dissapointment of a son, a lazy piece of shit". It's funny when parents raise a kid with their stupid beliefs so that the kid feels fucking terrible and is convinced everything is his fault when there is actually something wrong with the synapses. I will no longer blame myself. I forgive myself. I am ready to let go. Both me and my parents want my success and I will give it to us, at the cost of my health

>>17516143
Update: Jokingly called her out for it when I saw her earlier, she got offended because she was apparently working nonstop for the entire time.

I suppose I deserve to feel like an asshole for this.

... Maybe she'll like that I stood up for myself and acted alpha? Maybe?

>>17516728
So I'm thinking back to that day, and I remember after the doctor checked my stomach, I think either after that for a little later on, he asked if I was sexually active and I said no. But later on, they had me do a urine pregnancy test. I wonder now if my stomach felt abnormally hard?

>>17516743
I don't think your stomach gets before late pregnancy but the fuck do i know?

My ex-step brother who I have nothing in common with, my ex-step sister who I have nothing in common with and her somewhat qt friend who I've never met, plus my annoying as fuck overly extroverted wannabe hippie ex-step-mom literally JUST barged into my place 20 minutes ago without warning when it's a mess and tried to take me to go hang out with them, haven't even seen them in like half a year or more.

My step brother and mother were extremely pushy and even had these smiles on as if they were being cute and endearing when they were literally pissing me off by simply being here without even calling first

I denied them every time they asked me to come and finally they gave up, I had to say I'd hang out with my step-brother sometime before he leaves town though.

I don't want to hang out with them at all, but regardless of the activity it's annoying as fuck when you aren't given any warning before you're asked to make a decision. When people do this it automatically sets my brain to "fuck no" mode, like I can't help but feel that the only existing option is to deny them unless it's a friend I would actually enjoy hanging out with. But even then I'd be annoyed that they showed up without saying shit first and it'd probably kill my mood for a while. Why do normies do this? And they never have the decency to give up quickly. I've suffered unannounced riajuu invasions my entire life and it hasn't completely stopped even after my dad and step-mom broke up. I feel so autistic for refusing them so hard (in terms of how persistent I was with rejecting them, not how I did it) but I can't deny that it felt like the right thing to do. They know I barely clean too, but they still brought a total stranger (whose opinion I would stress over as she was a qt) over without warning.

I've never even posted in these threads before but I got so annoyed after they left I felt like I had to type this out. Glad I did though because I feel better now.

Autism is a terrible affliction

>>17516755
Hey, anything may help. I've gone on this bored and others searching for advice about this, and people usually don't know what it is. I can tell you my symptoms if you want

So lately I've been getting this idea into my head to see the world. Of course, this takes lots of planning and sustaining myself abroad somehow. Maybe joining and working for the Red Cross, their international organization might be the answer. I could see the sights (as horrible and destroyed as they might be) and also help people at the same time.

Is it weird that I pull out my eyebrow hairs sometimes?

I know there's that thing where people pull their hair out but I only do it with my eyebrows and never to the point where there's bald spaces.

>>17516761
Now you see why people post in these threads, for many people it feels good to talk about the problems we have

>>17516788

I did that when I was little, then it moved onto eyelashes and then to the hair on my head. I had to go to therapy for it. I haven't been diagnosed with this, but it is apparently called Trichotillmania. You may want to check this out, familia

>>17516803
I thought that it might have been an anxiety or boredom or coping thing. I bite my lip, nails, the skin around my nails, and also pick at my ears and scabs. I don't do it anymore but as a kid I used to chew on my hair. I started using Qtips a couple years ago after going my whole life without them and now every time my ears feel even the slightest bit waxy I have to use them. I'm just a picker.

>Trichotillmania
>A sense of pleasure or relief after the hair is pulled
It is kind of nice
>Playing with pulled-out hair or rubbing it across your lips or face
I like to roll it between my fingers

This is a little concerning. I don't think I'm at that point yet though.

>>17516776
You can tell me but i'm going to sleep so i probably won't be able to answer; if anything someone else can answer you. It's free to try.

I feeling really lost right now even though I have set goals and I'm going to school. It feels good to have my academic career in check but my stomach is constantly in knots.
I don't know if I'm homesick or if it's just irrational fear but I wish I could just feel comfortable with being happy

>>17516739
You're an idiot.

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>>17516903
Ok, and if you don't respond, I hope you have a good night. So for the past 7 months I've had
>Nausea
>Vomiting (rare but happens in late morning)
>Fatigue
>Bloating of lower abdomen (like a bump, but entirely of my lower abdomen)
>Feeling of movement in lower abdomen

Senpai it's like if I put my hand on there, it feels like something moves against it

>>17516901

Yeah I think the reason why I haven't been specifically diagnosed with it is because they connect it to anxiety. Maybe subconsciously it is, but it sometimes happens when I'm not doing anything. I had to take matters into my own hands and demonstrate self control over it

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why is my girlfriend so stupid sometimes?

like she just does shit every once and a while that makes me question her mind.

>>17516953
like?

>>17516935
It's scary how it can escalate like that. I can't even imagine pulling out my eyelashes. Way to close to my eyeballs.

My brow is a little sore now.

>>17516953
Women don't have the same type of logic you do.
They think primarily about how people feel about the answer to question.

Some men think that way, some women think logically, but stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason

>>17516981
Unrelated to anyone you're replying to, but I have contacts.
Hearing people say they're squeamish about stuff near their eyes entertains me.

Shit, I can finger fuck my eyeballs now.
You get used to it

>>17516981

It was over a span of a few years, with on/off periods. When you notice your hands going to pull, try to put your hand between your legs or make a fist, after a while it will be less persistent

I'm the anon that the person you responded to, responded to. Yeah that was before I got contacts kek

>>17516988
>You get used to it
I guess it would be. Right now even eye drops are a no no for me. God help me if I ever get some sort of infection or something like on Monsters Inside Me.

>>17516991
I'll try to catch myself doing it.

The same with the nail biting. I've avoiding nail biting on and off for years but I always fall back into it. Polish doesn't work because I like to peel it off when it's half dry and rubbery. When they do grow out I like to pick the dirt out of them with toothpicks or thumbtacks. I can't stand how dirty they can look even after I stand there and persistently scrub them with soap. It's also more satisfying to bite them off after they've grown out a bit.

>>17517027

I understand how you feel, anon. There's points in time where I just feel the hair, instead of pulling and I try to stop myself from doing that.

>>17517035
I do that too

So, i used to move around a lot. Currently I'm 23 and Im living at my 12th appartement. Due to all the moving I never had long lasting friends... At some part of my life I even had none at all because I stopped bothering about assimilating.... It was hell. Never felt so fcking lonely throughout my life. The few I had managed to get betrayed me, lied, and I caught them talking shit about me.. Caused me to have some trust issues.
Now I moved out of my parents home and my only wish is to finally stay at one place for a longer time .. Connect with people ... Have friends.
I got myself a long distance bf through gaming. We started as fuckbuddies and switched after he confessed, would have been more romantic if I hadn't been so damn drunk but oh well. Anyway.. He introduced me to friends and family and I'm realizing wtf I missed throughout all these years. Was so awkward when he said something like "and they would enjoy being your friend too"
I cried like a bitch although I didn't want to.. Problem is of course that this is a long distance relationship. So I would have to move.. Again... And for the time being I'm bound job-wise to this location.

I've been plotting to talk to my girlfriend's best friend, but I don't have her number and I can't just message her on Facebook. I do have her Kik username though. If I look her up and hit "start chatting" does it show any indication that I looked her up or does it just say "we've found your contact on Kik"? I know she wants to talk to me, and I feel I can work out some mutual affair with her.

>>17517047
It's hard but after demonstrating self control it helps

>be me
>youngest out of 3 boys
>one older brother would physically abuse me while the other mentally
>"you're gonna be an older brother, anon"
>longest 9 months i've ever waited
>tie shoe laces, get ready to go to hospital
>i remember it like yesterday, we get there and literally every room leading up to my mom's was empty
>gut feeling that tells you the worst is happening
>dad tells me to make sure my laces are tied and to do so in the cafeteria
>find out my mom had twins
>had

i miss you, it's all my fault. i dont get why im here, i dont get anything.

>>17517060
Don't go after your best friend's girl. It's one of the cruelest things to do

>>17517051
I'm a lot like you.
I grew up moving a lot.

I'm almost 30 now and I still don't have any sense of what "home" feels like.
Aren't you jealous about people saying what their home is?

Anyways, don't do long distance.
Try wherever you are.
I dated a girl like 4 years back when I first moved to city.
It didn't work out.

But then I met her ex.
Then I met her ex's friends, and now they're my friends.

You just need to meet people, however you can

>>17517063

Who passed away? Your mother, or your younger twin siblings? I am a bit confused. Either way, I'm very sorry for your loss

>>17517065
It's not my best friend's girl, it's my girlfriend's friend/cousin

>>17517075
Fuck, I'm blind. Still, that's not cool dude

>>17517069
I wouldnt say jealous.. I yearn for it, but I don't wish them anything I'll just because they had luck with their upbringing.

But don't to long distance .. It has gotten difficult for me to get to know people. I have started to build up some friends at work but none of them want anything else to do apart from our job.
The one who does can't always go out and has no friends at all but me, although she has been here al her life. She's Muslima though and her family doesn't approve of her going out a lot, or at all during night times.
So when we don't do anything I play games and got to know him. For the time being it doesn't feel like wasting time.. And considering that my only friend here will move away at the same time as I would be able to move out of here of my own will, this feels like a nice way to get through this Time.

HEY ADV I MADE A TINDER TODAY AND I STARTED TO TALK TO THIS REALLY NICE LAD AND HE'S NICE.
>caps lock is cruise control for cool

>>17517103
I feel you.
As you get older, the harder it is to make friends.
The older you are, the more catastrophic it is to move around.

If you live a city, there are clubs full of awkward people like you. Sometimes you meet someone who feels the same

(BTW in English we maintain the same pronoun between sentences. And we call "Muslims" Muslims regardless of sex)

I can't go on like this, each day same nothing unfulfilled crap. I'm unemployed but wake up 7 in the morning to watch my nephew,.so kind of a job but I hate it and his father owes me 7 months of pay at this point. I've got no Vitality/energy from my.chronic depression that I've had for 12 years.

The only reason I go in is I've failed a good few times to kill myself. While I don't believe in god of any of the religions per say I feel must be some purpose as to why I'm still here.

I knew if things were different what I'd want to do with my life but here I am turning 26 and I've not been able to move on it. Sometimes I wonder if what I truly want and deep down I say yes but I doubt myself because I can't dive into the aspect of learning how to do it.

>>17517138
Find a job.
Look for one most importantly.
I'm in a similar position. I'm figuring around a job in the Arctic circle. How I find that? I just looked.

And living with your nephew should something you thank god every day for.

I have a nephew. Haven't seen him for a year. I want nothing else than to tell him that I love him and that I have things to teach him.

Bottom line: You hate what you have.

>>17517160

I'm not the anon you're responding to, but you talking about having a nephew and wanting to teach him things reminded me of my friend, or rather, what he said two weeks ago...

>>17517160
Yeah, I just hate children. Always have. I know I hate what I have, been a bitter son of a bitch most of my life but trying to be better. On the outside I'm nice to everyone at least but I need to find energy to do what I want with my life and overcome my mental illness.

>>17517177
You're me, nigga.
I hate children, but I love my nephew.
I love him so much,

It's hard to say until you really think about it.
I hate existing. I don't like talking to people and every day is just a bore until I get to sleep.
But I think about my family and I begin to feel some kind of something.

Exist. Keep existing.
I'm trying to reach my sister now so I can help her with her son.
Life is hard. Life is always hard, but being together we can make it worth while. Misery loves company, remember?

>>17517175
What did he say 2 weeks ago?

I'm listening to Cat's in the Cradle and I'm fucking crying.
I'm 27 years old.
Why does this affect me?

I just hope that soon all of us find some clarity in our life.

Also I really wish she didn't have a boyfriend.

>>17517190
I apologize for the late response. It's gonna sound super out of context, but he said "Dude, you're definitely pregnant" and "I wanna teach my nephew a ton of stuff". He basically said he hopes for a nephew, if I am. I'm also the one that posted these >>17514634
>>17516612
>>17516929
>>17516743

>>17513598
I hate my personality. It pushes people away. I only have one friend, nobody else will spend time with me. I don't even know what it is about me. I've never been told I'm rude, weak, mean, anything. People just become sour towards me and give me these awful looks. I don't understand. All I want to do is understand damnit. DAMNIT!

I wish I was strong enough to end myself.

I don't wanna be annoying, we both agreed we weren't into the feelings part of relationships. But you give me mixed signals, and I know it's easy for me to have feelings for you. So I feel stuck between constantly wanting to talk to you, and not wanting to seem like I'm crazy and stalker like.

>>17517121
Thanks for the kind words anon.

Sadly I live on the countryside, people here are mostly keeping their distance from strangers, though it isn't only their fault. I do so too, after all.

The next city is an hour away. Strange enough that I found a fitness club around my corner- people there only mind their own business though and starting a conversation there seems mostly strange. Might just be because I am still trying to loose some weight and most of them are pretty fit.

Well. I'll manage, some way or another. At least I can proudly say that suicide never crossed my mind, no matter how few friends I had or "friends" who betrayed me.

(And yes, I'm still improving my English. So I guess I appreciate the other /adv/ too ;) ! )

>>17517223
Are you pregnant?

That's what all your posts seem to say without saying it. You're afraid of it at least.

Are you or aren't you?
It doesn't matter the sex of the child.
Are you going to be a mother?

Me and my boyfriend have only been together about 9 months, and I'm now 5 months pregnant.
>controls everything I do
>not allowed to have any friends
>tells me what to do with my money (he has a lot of debt so it literally goes to all his bills)
>makes fun of the fact that I work at walmart
>randomly brings up the ONE other guy I've been with, months before I met him, and screams at me for it
does shit like:
>my phone was on silent and I didn't answer, must be cheating
>was asleep when he got home omg I didn't greet him boo fucking hoo
>calls me stupid, a whore, slut, idiot, bitch, etc, a lot of times under his breath
>still talks about his exes (used to still text them but I actually managed to stop that bullshit) meanwhile if HE THINKS of my ONE "ex", I get screamed at and called a whore
>gets mad when I cry, never hugs me or makes me feel better, usually storms out instead
>CONSTANTLY threatening to kill himself
>calls my problems stupid, only his are significant
>ignores the fact that because I'm pregnant I'm absolutely exhausted, sore (especially since I am a grocery stocker and am on my feet 8 hours a day running around sweating my ass off), don't eat enough because I'm too fucking tired, over emotional because of hormones, still get nauseous, etc, and any time I mention one of these things, he either says I'm making excuses or, "me too" and starts talking about his own problems
>never asks me how I'm feeling, does anything for me, etc
I could go on for fucking hours. How did I get myself into this situation? I'm too weak and fucking drained of energy to stand up for myself or do anything but literally sit there and take every single thing he throws at me. I know it's my fault, I could tell him to go fuck himself at any time, but I'm depressed and I don't care enough to do anything about it. I do know that if he treats my son the same way, I'll kick him in the fucking balls for sure, though. I want to run away from this whole thing.

>>17517190
I'll keep going, I can't quit on my family yet. I saw what my older sisters suicide did to my family and I know mine be just as bad. Sadly wish I could say I feel more for my family than I to but at least I feel enough to not take my life yet.

>>17517278

Unless I was drugged and raped, then no. I didn't have sex, but as I said, for 7 months I've had these weird symptoms that are all too similar to that. My friends seemed convinced of it though. I do love babies and little kids, they're funny and adorable

>>17517292
Take yourself and your unborn baby, and find some family members to stay with. That guy is only going to get worse, I think you should get away from him

>>17517246
The worst part is, it's only when I leak a little of how I really feel about a situation or person that people immidiately drop me like a fucking rock. It used to be just girls, but now even friends just lock me out now.
It's always the same shit too "oh sorry, I've been busy lately. Another time for sure" Another time isn't gonna ever fucking come is it Mack!? It's been 2 damned months! We hung out for years, why do you act like this now!?

Lisa, why do you look at me with such disgust? I don't even fucking approach you, I see male co-workers harass you sexually, yet you look at ME like that? Fuck you you bitch, I've done nothing yet you direct it at me. I'm tired of trying to be nice. Fuck all of this. Being nice gets nothing but scorn. People think I'm some calculated manipulative fuck or a complete dunce to what your implying. I know all too well, but I can't lash out for you being a bitch can I? Then I'm the villain!

>>17517271
The English in this post is immaculate.
That's something you should be proud of.

I forget what the original post was on about, but a fitness club is a good thing. I started to go the gym around 8 months ago. The biggest guys seemed the most polite. I like doing squats each time I go. Maybe you can do the same? I had a friend to go with me the first time.

Anyways, are you Eastern Euro? Fucking great food there.

Hearing the water pour brought me back, to lying on your bed, to watching you, waiting for you to come back so we could drift off for the night. Still, nearly a year later, I see that, feel that bed, feel you, so close.

Why can't I just move on already? You're no longer that person after all...

>>17517316
The world can be fucked up at times. Do you feel any better after venting out?

>>17517316
It's all so safe. It's like a fucking footsie match in fighting games. Everyone is trying to make the safe moves only and if you over extend you lose. It's so frustrating. I can't be honest with anyone, or they'll leave me too. . .

It's so hard, it's like having to lock yourself in a box all the time. You want to love yourself, be yourself, and be free. You can't. Not without losing the only connections you have left. So you stay in the cold dark box, lonely inside and out.

>>17517328
It's not the person, it's what you want.

They made you feel wanted and comfortable.
Anyone can do that, but it takes time.

Let that person go. There will be more

>>17517296
>>17517278
Adding onto what I said, I have been worried that I somehow could be, or if it's something even scarier

>>17517332
A little, it lets me actually feel some emotion again, anger and rage are better than the depression and emptiness I've felt for these past weeks. It isn't a solution.

>>17517347
You can miss periods all the time and also feel hungry for weird shit.

You're not pregnant.
If you go like 3 months without bleedin', then maybe, but you sound just paranoid about it.

You worried about having a babe?
How's your sister?
How's your fucking mum?
Connect, yo

>>17517352
I probably am being paranoid, and in no way would I be ready for a child of my own. But the feeling of something practically moving in my lower abdomen is what really sets it off

>>17517348

It's time to start telling people "Fuck off", if someone takes advantage of your kindness. It's time to stop the cycle

>>17517366
>But the feeling of something practically moving in my lower abdomen is what really sets it off
Probably farts.
You got a fart baby

Or just have to shit.

You crazy woman.

>>17517373
It doesn't feel like a "I gotta take a massive shit" feel, and is it possible to have gas that long?

>>17517378
You worry too much.
Jack off and eat good food.
Shit when you need to shit.

That's' it. That's life.

>>17517392
Senpai it's been 7 fucking months, this is like Mr bone's wild ride.

This is a little bit of drama that doesn't matter much, but basically I think I'm 'friends' with a sociopath.
Here's the people involved in this story, all of whom are friends with each other (fake, but similar names):
1. Mark - the aforementioned possible sociopath
2. Kevin - Claire's boyfriend
3. Claire - Kevin's girlfriend, Sarah's best friend
4. Sarah - Claire's best friend
5. Louis - Kevin's best friend
6. Me - Friends with all of the above, have a mutual romantic interest in Sarah

So the story basically starts last week, with Mark asking Sarah out on a date. They've been friends for two years, but she wasn't really interested in him romantically so she rejected him. So Mark is fucking furious, and talks to Louis about how he doesn't even like Kevin and was just pretending to so he could get closer to Sarah and that Claire (Kevin's girlfriend) is his "backup" plan. Obviously, this is a pants-on-head retarded thing to do since Louis is Kevin's best friend. So word about all this gets around to everyone (except Sarah) and I'm just kind of in the middle of it, except Sarah and I have a mutual romantic interest. So everyone who knows Mark except Sarah is mad at him now (without him knowing).
So basically:
1. How long should I wait to ask Sarah out after she just rejected a guy? I don't really want to start any shit between me and Mark if I don't have to.
2. Should I tell Sarah about the shit that Mark said?
3. Should I tell Mark that no one likes him anymore, or just kind of leave him ignorant?
Even if no one responds, it was pretty helpful to just write all this out and consider my options.

>>17517401
Maybe you got like gluten allergies or shit.

If you got gut problems for 7 months either you pregnant or you eating shit that you shouldn't be eating.

Still masturbate a lot though. That's a tried and true stress reliever.

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I wish I didn't have problems with premature ejaculation. I didn't used to. Then about three years ago it became a problem and nothing seems to fix it. It's shattered my self confidence and ruined my dating/love life. The depression and social anxiety I suffered from (and still suffer from) only makes it worse.

Almost makes me wish I was a woman, desu.

>>17517409
I know I don't have a gluten allergy
>Still masturbate a lot though. That's a tried and true stress reliever
Preach

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what was the point of putting myself trought the pain of eye surgery, getting new clothes , taking care of myself as much as i can, and constantky watching videos on how to be social if in the end im still not good enough for any girl, and im losing again to a guy that doesn't have any passion or path on their lives

now im everyone's friend in class i go out and have fun with everyone except for the only person i really want to go out with, no matter how much i impress the class with my work, how many friends i get or what i say to ask her out she just says that she has something else to do and leaves, meanwhile she seems to be more friendly to that guy who smokes weed and can't even hold a tought for more than 2 seconds he is not even interested in her, that guy is always sad about a girl that he could never get, so i guess in that way we are similar

i try to look on the bright side, this girl hasnever actually said no to me, she just says that she is busy and she never hangs out with the rest of the class

but i don't like seeing her talking with this guy,i feel like this is going to end up like the last 2 times i felft something for a girl, and i'll just see her falling for a loser that has that special thing i'll never have no matter how much effort i put

>>17517415

Hey, no matter how early you cum, at least you're not Flash, eh?
I don't know how to help you, but I would at least like to make you smile

>>17517425
That sucks bro.
Not going to tell you in some way that it was really for your wholesome good.

But I can tell you that people can tell whether you do something for yourself or for them.

You know what I mean? It's like a used car salesman speech when you are doing it for yourself.

>broke up with girlfriend of 3.5 years.
>been six months.
>literally just go on dates, drink too much and work.
>not really motivated to do shit; feel like goals are gone because not planning 'happy family' any more.
>not sure I even want that.

wtf is wrong with me.

I'm really very depressed right now.

I'm torn between this girl that I used to love, and the rest of the world.

I know that this particular girl and I will no longer be a thing, that was already established by her a couple of weeks ago and honestly it was for the best.

But I still miss the shit out of her. I've been on a couple of dates, and have some more scheduled, but even then, I'm still just not as happy as I used to be. It's harder to do much of anything honestly, and it gets harder with each day.

Suicide is definitely an option because almost everything that I try to do has ended up in failure as of late, and I'm tired of trying to fight it.

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>>17517409
Well, I need some sleep. I've been stressed out for over a week over those two issues, and it's 2:24 am. I'm still not over my friends issue, so if you see a thread (like letter or a venting issues thread) with a post like that, that's me, familia. Thank you for listening to my issues. You have a good night, familia

I've found my reason to live.

I'm going to dedicate these next few months to the purpose of getting with and banging my qt white coworker as a way to redeem us marginalized fucks that this western society that I oh so long to adhere to rejects.

It will be redemption for not just me, but for plenty of others like me. Its channeling a greater cause into a small case, but fuck every hit against this uphill battle is one worth striving for.

>>17517446
You too, familia. Same time zone.
Try to be relaxed and happy.

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>>17517433
I appreciate the attempt, anon. Thank goodness I'm good at eating pussy at least, or I'd never EVER get laid. I don't know why it only started over the past 3 years. I've been sexually active since I was 16, and now I'm 25. It feels like the end of my sex life and I'm only 1/4 of the way through life. Please kill me.

>>17516015

Idk, then fucking talk to me about it. I may be more capable of doing what's asked of me if you gave a shit when I tried to talk to you about it. Instead you completely ignore me. Thanks. I don't even want to be the hope for humanity, if no one cares enough to give me direction or help when I need it.

If you gave a shit, you might, idk, tell me directly.

I keep getting told it gets better. When?

>>17517533
You need to learn to fill your own gas tank padawan

>>17517544

I appreciate the reply. I'm seeing a therapist and stuff. I used to be so motivated and I'm not anymore. Should I pursue music and build around it, or suck it up and get a regular job? Am I schizophrenic or exactly what I'm supposed to be? When does it get better?

>>17517554
It gets better after you get moving. Being crazy can be genetic, so accept that there's a chance that there is nothing that you can do about the fact that you don't like people looking at you when you go places.

As far as pursuing your passions and/or getting a real job, I would say you should strike down the middle and try to do both as much as you can.

I hear that cocaine does wonders if you're interested in a brief and imperfect shortcut.

>>17517556

It's not even really the crazy. Crazy I can deal with. The crippling depression is more difficult. I've worked jobs before, but the task seems harder now. Maybe I should join a commune. Make enough money through shows to enjoy vagrancy.

>>17517402
so lame
watching you guys slobber over one girl in the group
b-b-but women only message and give chads the time of day!
lmao
i fucking hate men

>>17516068
Fwb is a relationship. Except there is no specification to be faithful. If I wasn't single, I would rather have an exclusive relationship

>>17516982
What you've just displayed is the man's increased tendency towards cognitive bias. Overly relying on heuristics rather than assessing something based on multiple sources of information.

http://www.hookingupsmart.com/2014/04/01/politics-and-feminism/men-exhibit-more-confirmation-bias-than-women/

It's okay, I'm sure with enough assertiveness you can convince me that you're not a flaming fucking idiot.

Dude has got to stop reading more into mere conversations than he should. I am not seeking a relationship, the person I talk to does not seek a relationship with me, we hardly know each other and merely share common ground. If I could tell him this, I would, only because he's going to cause a misunderstanding that hurts the other person way more than he could ever hurt me. Unfortunately I can't, and said guy doesn't even know me, he's just reading more into it than is healthy. Not to mention, the misunderstanding can and will negatively impact a developing crush they have on someone else.

I reported a friend to the DEA (hes a big drug dealer here) because he got a girlfriend after fucking me up for a year. If I get kidnapped, raped, and killed, it'd be worth it as long as he cant be with her in prison.

>post a thing
>nobody reads it or cares or is listening

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>>17513949
So today marks night 3, and honestly, it isn't that bad.

The pain is still there, and I try to stay off Facebook and all that shit. But I think I'm gonna be okay.

I realize the only way I can get over her, is it need to get stronger. Whether it's physical, mental or social. I must expand outside my comfort zone and become the man I've always wanted to be.

I'm gonna be the best damn me ever. Or at least try till the fire in my heart burns out...

Don't get me wrong, I miss the fuck out of her, and I'm having to rebuild myself. But I can see myself returning back to my old strong roots.

Keep being awesome /adv/.

I may have seriously fucked my liver, or my other organs, but I'm more worried about this blood test in itself rather than the results.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

>>17517326

Why, thank you. I appreciate your compliments :)

I'm mostly running the mill. It's a pretty small gym so I know a few faces already. Can't put any names to it though. Felt a bit awkward to talk to them when they are listening to music with earplugs.

And no, I'm from Germany, though I'm spanish. At least my passport is- I'm horrible at speaking it.

Fuck I am so tired of living each day in misery. It's not as easy as "Just cheer up" , "Don't let yourself think like that"
I've done so much work on myself, and now I'm at a standstill.
I used to want to die, for years! And I "opened the door" to the possibility that one day I will be content.
But the negative thoughts and feelings, they just won't leave.
I don't need money. I'm fine being without love, one day I'll find it and I'm not in a rush.
"Get a hobby" They say, well I've got the guitar, I've got my camera, I've got my videogames, I've got my books. I work my fulltime job.

What the fuck? Why can't I just live without being miserable? Not even HAPPY all the time, but just NORMAL at least....

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I'm still playing LoL and smoking weed.
Shoot me.