Girls, would it creep you out if a guy asked you out like this?

>>17513028
Sounds pretty good to me. If I liked you I'd be ecstatic and if I wasn't into it I'd at least be pretty flattered. The way you want to go about it sounds fine.

Have you actually talked to her before? Does she know you exist?

Yea I am in a similar dilemma, no reason to talk to her and can't choose to sit next to her. I wasn't planning on being that direct but definitely was thinking to go for her after class just not sure what to say, but did not wanna be that forward cus if she is not down/gotta boyfriend all that. Dont wanna be all study buddy though either.

GO FOR IT

>"Hey, this is probably a bit forward"

Drop that shit. You're not being forward, you're being a normal fucking person. Just say, "Hey, I'm anon by the way. What did you think of (topic brought up in class)"

It's not hard, kids

>>17513035
I haven't spoken a word to her, but she knows I exist. I was made an example in class this morning (Professor was joking about my last name being funny) and she was giggling and looking at me. So the girl knows who I am.

>>17513045
"What did you think of "topic brought up in class"?

That doesn't feel like the most fake conversation there is.

>>17513028
>Hey, this is probably a bit forward, but I think you're pretty cute.
Why do so many of you idiots think this is a good line?

>>17513068
What's a good line?

>>17513068
Would you like to suggest something then?

>Why do you think it's a good line?
Because it cuts the bullshit right out and gets to the point?

>>17513064

It's called an ice breaker. Adults understand that it's used to start conversation. Most people aren't actually all that interested in the weather or what you do for a living, but chances are you have experienced weather or do something for a living.

>>17513077
this

Here's how you'll know the truth: if she likes you and you give her any opportunity to respond to anything you say to her, then she will respond. If she doesn't take that opportunity, then forget it. The up side is you can come up with anything because if a girl likes you she'll give you a chance, the downside is you'll know immediately how she feels if the test fails.

>>17513079
I feel like that's the same thing as me asking "So do you eat food?"

Not trying to be a dick, I just never understood the whole "generic conversation line" bit

>>17513088

>I just never understood the whole "generic conversation line" bit

Yeah, I know, that's why you're on 4chan looking for advice on how to fucking ask a girl out. It's not rocket science.

"Hey, I'm John, we're in English 104 together. (pick 1: Are you a freshman? What's your major? Why did you pick this school? Can you help me with homework? Did you do that last paper? Do you know when x is due? Do you know when our next test is? Do you want to grab lunch?"

Walking up to a stranger and saying "hey, I think you're cute, let's grab coffee" is weird as fuck, at least get someone's fucking name first.

>>17513104
So here is my whole issue with this little bit. What to talk about is real easy and straightforward in college. What do you think about this quiz/where are you from/whats your major/bla bla bla. My problem is initiating and that there is no reason to ask the girl these questions, we dont sit next to each other and we are not at an event or function or anything. I mean she'll know you're just talking to her because you think shes cute which I dont know it just makes me way more nervous but I guess as someone said before you will know right away if she wants to give you a chance or not and that is that.

>>17513140

The reason why you would be talking to her is because you want to talk to her... You don't need another reason. It's not awkward. Women like attention. You don't need an excuse.

>>17513104
pick 1: Are you a freshman in a freshman only course? What's your major, as if that's not an odd thing to just ask a stranger? Why did you decide to go to the cheapest state college around? Can you think I'm a dipshit or just trying to play coy? Did you do that last in-class paper that everyone else had to finish before they left? Do you know when x is due after it was up on the board for the past week? Do you know when our next test is even though it's in the syllabus?

I don't see what's so wrong with just cutting the bullshit right out? If I decide to use any of those generic "ice breakers", she's going to immediately know I just want an excuse to talk to her. So why not just say something that already conveys "Hey, I think you're cute. Let's talk over coffee sometime."


tl;dr why shouldn't I just cut the bullshit right out?
>Because my social ques.

Girl here. A lot of girls will fall for the "I think you're pretty cute line" but fuck no that's sappy as fuck. Be real and drop that. Just start off by straight up asking her "Hey wanna get something to eat/coffee" "Wanna hang out sometime?"

>>17513147
So I'll just go up to her after class and be like >insert generic intro< and then thats that. It sounds so simple when you write it out like this but actually doing that is nerveracking as fuck. 100 times harder then just talking to a girl at a party.

>>17513104
you're not very nice

>>17513167

No, it's literally not hard at all, you're being dense. It's still super early in the year. Just walk up and introduce yourself as though you are someone worth knowing.

>I don't see what's so wrong with just cutting the bullshit right out? If I decide to use any of those generic "ice breakers", she's going to immediately know I just want an excuse to talk to her. So why not just say something that already conveys "Hey, I think you're cute. Let's talk over coffee sometime."

You are looking at this wrong. Generic small talk shows you are interested in learning about another human being. Wanting to "cut to the chase" and get food with someone who knows literally nothing about you is creepy.

>>17513068
give us the better line then, Hitcheinstein

>>17513179

Nice? What is nice? Doing something to make other people feel good? I do things for me, senpai. Just be glad I'm here at all.

>>17513162
So if a guy in your class that you have not spoken a word to just came up to you after class and said "Hey, you wanna get coffee with me sometime? You're not gonna think that's a bit odd?

>fuck no that's sappy as fuck
Not intending it to sweep her off her feet. I'm saying it because I'm trying to convey "I think you're cute. Because I think you're cute, I want to get to know you more. Let's get coffee."

>>17513185

"do you like hooping? I've got hula hoops. light up, neon, with the nylon hooks"

>>17513193

Jumping to what you think about someone's physical appearance is creep, plain and simple. Them being attractive is what brings you to them in the first place. The small talk you make helps you decide if you want to ask her to coffee/study/party. If she fucks up, you don't have to ask her. You're a cool, friendly, popular guy and people want to know you. She'll be more worried about seeming awkward in front of you, promise.

>>17513203
I'm pretty sure girls have such high confidence and self esteem these days that they never feel awkward or worried around a guy unless it's a total Chad or something. Considering guys simply want girls for being girls and girls are in charge of the whole situation. The market is in their favor.

>>17513211

>I'm pretty sure girls have such high confidence and self esteem these days that they never feel awkward

HAHAHA, that is hilarious. Oh, you're not joking?

A guy who acts with confidence gets what he wants. It's why con-men are a thing. You just have to act like she should be excited you're talking to her. It's the oldest trick in the book, but it still works. 90% of women (and people) in the world have self-esteem issues, you are vastly overestimating them.

>>17513220
I used to think the way you do but experience made me change my mind. But I hope you are still right and I'm wrong though.

>>17513220
I don't get how cutting the shit right out, stating what you want, and asking her if she wants the same is anything BUT a male conveying confidence.

>>17513226

You have to at least believe you are right. Sounds like you a mental block to overcome

>>17513028
I would drop the cute bit. If that's the only thing you like about me, get to know me first. And if you get to know me, and that's still the only thing you like about me, then move on. I've never had a successful relationship with a guy that came on to me in that way, so it just looks like you're trying to get into my pants (which isn't a bad thing, I just want something different). Befriend us first, especially if she's shy.

>>17513236
Yah I'm going through some self esteem problems lately but I'm sure I'll get over it.

>>17513231

"ME GEORGE. YOU CUTE. WANT FUCK. MEET DINNER?" so alpha

Confidence is not the same thing as being a fucking brute. Have manners.

You have to put yourself in this person's shoes. Random guys coming up and asking you out without even trying to talk to you first is ALWAYS creepy, unless you're an athlete coming out after a W.

>>17513243

I feel you, and putting yourself out there is a risk and can hurt. You can always practice with other randos first, and then move on to your mark later.

>>17513184
Alright lets say I am dense as fuck. I just dont get how its not creepy when you have no reason to talk to her except wanting to talk her. Just showing up to her and being like hey im such and such, what did you think about that quiz? Thats chill I guess but I feel like it'd come off lame as fuck unless you have like a really confident delivery and I know I would be nervous as fuck. Shits more intimidating then skydiving to me. At least during that I know what I need to do to make it work (most of the time lol).

>>17513253

If going up to someone you like it intimidating, then go up to some random person that looks cool. Just practice with random people. You are at a school full of people. Just go up and make conversation and move on.

Confidence is a muscle and you have to train it. Just go and do it.

>>17513253
>Just showing up to her and being like hey im such and such, what did you think about that quiz? Thats chill I guess but I feel like it'd come off lame as fuck unless you have like a really confident delivery and I know I would be nervous as fuck.
Not that anon, but I understand where you're coming from. However, she'll understand that you're trying to approach her in a respectful manner. If she likes you, and wants to get to know you more, you've made it easier for her to talk to you.

>>17513253

On a more fundamental level, the only reason you should be doing ANYTHING is because you want to.

>>17513265
I'm not that anon but I have a question: When you say practice you don't mean practice asking people out, or flirting way too hard, right?
I mean I would be worried of getting a date with someone that I'm just talking to for practice and that doesn't interest me.

>>17513269
>if she likes you
at what point do these random girls who may not even be aware of your existence until now realize they indeed like you? when you start talking to them? do you go from zero to date material just in one conversation?
(asking this because I've only asked girls out after talking to them for a few days, with varying degrees of success, mostly rejections lel)

>>17513273

No, just practice talking to people. One of the best skills in life to have is the ability to go from a stranger to a friend. People are mostly the same, want the same things, and like talking about the same things (themselves).

It's important to learn how to break the ice, how to break down the barriers that we put up. All it takes is practice, and you can live in a world that's so much more accessible. Being able to make pleasant conversation will help you find partners, make friends, get jobs, haggle for discounts, find cool local spots while traveling, pretty much anything involving other people (which is most things).

>>17513284
Oh then yes I completely agree.

>>17513269
Hope this chick is at least slightly interested otherwise looks like its gunna be rough but I mean it doesn't really work any other way. I guess the more confident the more she'll be down though probably

>>17513279

See, you're approaching the situation as though they DON'T already like you (or that you're not inherently likable).

Simply having a 5-minute conversation with you should be enough for anyone to be enamored. That's the headspace you need to be in when you make conversation.

You're so worried about whether or not the other person likes you. Them liking you is not the point. You need to find out if YOU like THEM. The best way to do that is over coffee/lunch. You can just assume that people will like you, because if you act like they should, they probably will.

>>17513292
Good luck bro

>>17513265
>>17513284

This is a good suggestion and what I think I am needing to get more comfortable and more confident and thus more likeable, but I've just got questions about the details. I mean I think I am like most guys on this board with a mind geared towards logic and straightforward thinking you know I want to be able to replicate something and all that but the trick is conversations are all dynamic and different which most of the time is fine but sometimes is tricky. However, what mainly concerns me is the intro, the icebreakers, how to turn it from oh this is awkward to alright this guy is chill/not that that creepy. Do you have any like resources or just suggestions about things to say or basically just how to start from walking down the sidewalk to in full conversation with the person you saw at the bus stop by you. Like I wanna know what I should say, how i should get there attention, etc. I am fiending for the details.

>>17513296
Thanks man

>>17513028
>If I do that, what are the chances she's gonna think I'm a fuckin psycho?

Abso-fucking-lutely not. That is so normie i dont know even you even belong on 4chan. Either scenario, her saying yes or no, you have the right idea about how to approach it barring any more casual opportunity to talk to her.

>>17513309

I get what you're saying. There is a logical flow to conversation, but it just doesn't work like an equation or a computer code. With enough time it WILL make sense to you, because you're a smart person and can figure it out. It's just one of those things you have to DO a bunch of times before you become fluent. Tying your shoes isn't hard but it probably took you a few times to figure it out. Now you don't even think about it.

As for ice breakers, the standard ones really do work: "how about this weather?"
"how about that (shared activity) we just participated in?"
"are you from around here? business or pleasure?"
"my name's anon, by the way"

The rest can be filled in with random stuff: do they like cats or do they like dogs? Do they like your favorite band? Have they heard of your favorite show?

It's ok to have a short chats, long conversations and anything in between. Just smile, ask a pertinent question, and crack a joke if you see an opening.

>>17513028
Just do it exactly as you've said it, OP. If she likes you, your chances are nearly 100% success. Straightforward is the way to go.

>>17513028

It's actually the perfect way to ask her. Good job.

>>17513340
All of these are good except the weather bit. Using the weather as an ice-breaker is cliche and it feels like an awkward ice-breaker, where ice-breakers are ideally not supposed to feel like ice-breakers.

Unless you're discussing what kind of weather you like; as in the topic comes up naturally in conversation. Just don't lead with it.

>>17513379

You're definitely wrong about that, especially with climate change going on. Where I live we've been having crazy heat and, "Oh, man, this weather's been crazy, huh?" has been a great opener since it's actually been abnormally hot. People love to rant about bad weather.

>>17513279
>at what point do these random girls who may not even be aware of your existence until now realize they indeed like you?
I mean like, as in, not dislike you. They just have to like what little they've experienced of your personality/looks/charms/whatever.

>do you go from zero to date material just in one conversation?
Depends on the person. Personally, no. I have to get to know someone first before I consider them date material.

>>17513028
You need to realize that you basically can't mess this up OP, she likes you

Go up to her and be like "Hey, I've seen you looking at me. I think someone has a crush" and make her blush and giggle

Then say "I'm just kidding around, but I think you're pretty cute too, let's go get lunch after class okay"

What's she going to say, no?

>>17513459
Ew.

>>17513408
Have you ever worked retail? Seriously the worst opener. No one is interested in having the same conversation 50+ times a day, especially not when someone is approaching to potentially ask for a date. It's completely fair and a great fall-back for any conversation that doesn't matter. But it lacks creativity for an ice-breaking conversation when such is begun with the intention to date, is all.

>>17513459
OP's version is better. Much, much better. A healthy dose of humility to balance out confidence is always a plus.

>>17513486

Retail work isn't the whole world.

You can talk about weather as a conversation starter without having to dwell on it. It's just something to say.

>>17513028
>Not sure how to go about this... Hey, this is probably a bit forward, but I think you're pretty cute. You wanna grab a coffee sometime?

Cut out the cute part:

"Hey, this is probably a bit forward, do you wanna grab a coffee sometime?"

> >Wait until class ends
>Wait till we're both out of the class in the halls

Great, so you're a stalker now.

After you see the "deer in headlights", just approach her.

>If I do that, what are the chances she's gonna think I'm a fuckin psycho?

If she says no, who the fuck cares?
Just get it done.

>>17513140
>My problem is initiating and that there is no reason to ask the girl these questions, we dont sit next to each other and we are not at an event or function or anything.

The reason to talk to her is because you think she's cute and you want to ba-ba-ba-bang her. I mean, "get coffee."

That is a valid reason.

That is a thing that people do.

No need to play games.

>>17513028
Dude, you're really over thinking it. I mean, you should probably just say SOMETHING to her... anything.

But back when I was in college I found a good way to talk to women was just sit next to them. Don't be distracting from the course/lecture, but make sure to acknowledge the woman's presence. Maybe talk to them after, maybe about the class. Or whatever.