TL;DR : Girlfriend got kissed by another girl I got pissed off

>the ride home GF and I talk
>she's telling me she never expected her to do that and that she's been trying to fight the stereotype that just because she's by she uses it to kiss the same sex whenever
>Never had really crossed my mind, but I help her calm down
>I don't blame her I blame the birthday girl completely
>sent a text to my GF's best friend telling her that the birthday girl owe's us an apology.
>Get an apology that was really half assed in my opinion.
>"I am so sorry for kissing GF. I don't remember much from last night but I was informed about that. I was drunk and stupid and I'm sorry. It will never happen again. Sorry"
>I give it a day and monday I feel like I need to make her truly understand why this can't happen again.
>"I just want to let you know what you did is unacceptable. I don't care if you're able to kiss anyone you want with your relationships but not giving consent to the person you're about to kiss that's in a relationship is gross and potentially relationship destroying. Being drunk or because it's your birthday is never a good excuse. Your friends tried to defuse the whole situation with a simple she's drunk it's fine, it's not fine and is a huge slap to the face to GF and I. You had GF and I crying for most of that night. You nearly destroyed all the trust she has earned with me in proving that just because she's bi doesn't mean she's making out with anyone from the same sex like it's a free pass. I hope the next time I see you isn't for a good while and if I do I expect you to understand that all relationships have different rules and just because your ignorant to someone else's rules doesn't make it okay to break them."
Cont...

>>17470698
>Before sending this to the girl I made sure my girlfriend was ok with it
>she tells me it's a bit harsh
>show her the message I got
>see's what i'm getting at and says that fine send it.
>I send it
>not to soon later I get a message from the girl.
>"Don't take this out on GF, she has done nothing wrong and has no reason to lose your trust. I am the one who fucked up. And being drunk or my birthday is no excuse I know. I'm sorry but if your made at anyone it's me not her. She has never cheated on your or done anything for you to question her. So if you base bisexuals off of my behavior that is your problem. I am sorry and I already apologized and talked to GF."
>"Also for a general FYI being bi doesn't give you a free pass to make out with whoever you want. Being in open relationship lets me see whoever I want so don't base what I do in on my open relationships as what everyone does."
>Don't know what the fuck she's talking about and try and typing to tell her you're missing the point
>get a message from GF telling me that her Best Friend told her to tell me to never message her again
>that the girl is about to break down crying at work
>delete the message I was about to send. and block her at my GF's wishes
>later that night talk to the GF about what happened
>she's siding with her Best friend saying I was too harsh
>wtf
>then telling me her best friend is super mad at me for what i wrote to her
>wtf
>she's taking her side saying she didn't ready the message in full and what i said was not right
>WTF
>girlfriend asks if I can give her a clarification letter so hopefully she can fix this mess.
>Write this

>>17470700
>"What I was trying to get across was after GF and I left the group GF talked to me about the perception that she felt Bisexual people get and that she hoped that she didn't lose any trust because of that night. So when I wrote that message I was trying to get across what GF told me. And to be clear I have never thought of GF as one of those people that use the term bisexual to get away with not being faithful. The overall message I wanted Girl to understand is that because she didn't give GF consent she had the chance to destroy a relationship in a second and you can't forgot about these kind of event because maybe next time this happens when you're drinking and you give a girl or guy a peck on the lips that relationship doesn't work and that relationship does crumble. I know no one would like that on their conscience."
>GF tells me that's good
>next day freaking out
>call the GF at night to see what her best friend thought about the letter
>still mad at me
>WTF
>ask my GF why?
>apparently she's had deeper issues with me and this was just the thing that broke the camel's back.
>She's trying to get her to talk to her and I last night but she had to get up early and it was midnight
>talk to GF and it sounds like it's going to be a two vs one discussion with me by myself on this one.
>if I can make it work with her best friend i basically am losing my GF in the process
>The best friend has the power to end this relationship
>Couldn't sleep last night
>been depressed all day and just posting the most depression shit on snapchat all day
>5-6 hours till this talk happens...
What the fuck do I do??!?! I don't know what I did to this girl to make her have a deep seeded hate for me or whenever but clearly she's ready to fuck up my relationship for it!
I don't know I go into this discussion without feeling like i already lost...

I stopped reading at (bi) and "open relationship"
Just abandon ship

>>17470698
In my opinion, You over-reacted. Of course, other guys is a clear no-no with a fist to the face...but girl on girlfriend kissing is cool.

Plus, bitches be drunk

>>17470703
In addition, you can't question why she has this hatred for you after you make an exceptionally big deal of two little girls kissing, one of whom is the birthday girl.

I sincerely understand that you take exclusivity very seriously. As long as your gf is on the same level (it was just an honest girly mistake. Phones mean everything to them) outside external factors shouldn't matter. Especially if it's just young girls being kissy appreciative

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>>17470727
I didn't swear at this girl or threaten this girl, I just wanted to let her know what she did was wrong. But somehow now I'm the bad guy.

>>17470737
You can't reason with girls my man. But I agree with your gf, it was a harsh. You went IN on that ass

Maybe this is just me but only a man can cuck you. Women mess around. Once a girl was trying to get with my girlfriend sexually and I didn't really care that much, but in general I'm pretty jealous like I would be uncomfortable with any man checking her out or hugging her or anything like that.

Maybe it's different if they're bisexual but only penis carriers are threats. Is this strange of me?

Fucking normies.

>>17470742
To me, it all depends on your girlfriends attitude. If she really means the exclusivity AND consistently proves it, then we're not gonna let other people, man or women, wreck what we're building.

Why the fuck get into a relationship if all you guys are gonna do in the end is cheat?

NEVER get married guys. Civil unionship at most if we have kids and can see we can tolerate each other for decades to come

>>17470740
I really didn't want her to do it again.

>>17470753
Civil dissolution is tons simpler than a divorce.

I also wouldn't say ALL women mess around. I'd like to believe 70% of men and women mess around. There are some really loyal guys out there like there are some legit Ride or Die bitches out there.

>>17470753
But honestly why do I care what another girl does to her? Women mess around with each other all the time. A man is different to me. She was kind of into the idea with this girl at first but then felt bad and called me and apologized. She had woken me up and I wasn't too bothered so she was a little bothered I didn't get jealous or mad but like I said, I would be uncomfortable if another guy even just hugged her or if she said a male celebrity was cute. I didn't even want to hear about past boyfriends but another girl? No problem.

>>17470759
The birthday girl? It was probably only just that one time. She lost her phone and your gf helped her found it. Her instincts was to kiss her out of happiness, not to seduce her and eventually lick her clit.

Again, as she, your gf, and i have said, don't punish anyone for this small instinct driven appreciation kiss from a girl. I'm afraid you've heavily spaghetti'd yourself. I somewhat cringed at the "you've made my gf and i cry last night".

Please do not take life too serious, young man.

>>17470779
that's fair, guess this was just a learning experience

OP I'm sorry to start: you're completely in the right, birthday girl was 100% out of line.

Having said that I think you went too far. I don't see your big issue with her apology. She could have said "k sorry" but this was a pretty standard awkward attempt to make amends. Yeah it could've been better but I don't think it was as big a deal as you made it out to be. As unfair as it might be, society has a huge double standard for two girls kissing and yeah, plenty of guys would actually have been fine with this scenario. That doesn't mean in any way, shape, or form that YOU should be, or that they are right somehow, but it does make it more plausible that in her drunken state she didn't process that you might just focus on the part where someone who's not you kisses your girlfriend on the mouth.

Also, I honestly think that your girlfriend should've done the messaging. This is her friend and to me it comes across as weird that you're suddenly being the spokesperson, like you called back your girl and you are more involved in the situation for being the betrayed boyfriend than she is for being the one the birthdaygirl kissed without a warning. You should've at least made sure that your girlfriend was also involved in messaging and not just silently standing by your side. Maybe that's just me but I'd be weirded out by that. How old are you?

>>17470793
I made sure to ask my girlfriend if the message I was about to send was alright by her. Later to find out that she just skimmed it. Again I realize now I was too harsh. I should have started the message out with this message was looked over by my GF. also I'm 24, she's 22.

>>17470774
I agree. Girls do love to show each others boobs and compare if they all got nice sets.

I also agree on the men part, but we can't fight that feeling. It's deeply ingrained in our evolution. Another being uncomfortably near your territory. Brings faint murderous feelings deep down in your limbic system. It's all unfortunately natural. You just gotta find how to cope with it. Knowing that we're all gonna die someday helps me realize how insignificant the issue is. But if it's an occuring with a certain person or multiple people, then its a whole 'nother story

>>17470811
>You just gotta find how to cope with it
Bro what are you talking about? I'm not going to be a cuck. Of course I realize I overreact with some innocent things and when that's the case I'll ignore those feelings but I'm also going to make clear where the limits are for someone to be with me.

>>17470820
Yeah, thats what i mean to say. If you can ignore those feelings over innocent stuff, that's actually great.

Sorry, i used poor choices of words last post

>>17470856
I forgive you anon. I'm glad there are still people that dislike being cucked. Half of /adv/ are people who were cheated on, or in open relationships.

>>17470703
Abandon ship and ignore the literal cucks in this thread saying it's ok for girls to mess around. A girl fucking with another girl is just as bad as her fucking with another guy.

This story will only get worse the longer you stay in this relationship. Jump ship. There are a billion women out there. Find another one.

P.S. A kiss on the face would not be a big deal if it was part of the culture and the other girl wasn't a lesbian/bi. None of that applies here so your reaction is justified.

prob could have had threesome, spergs out instead effectively drying both pussies.

I only got two walls of text in
But I know from that long ass tldr you sent her friend

Youre a jealous asshole. Protip from a bisexual: find a non bisexual gf. You're just hurting each other forcing her into a relationship where she can't be open about herself. You flip out over a drunken kiss on someone's 21st?
Are you even emotionally stable enough for a relationship?

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not reading all that because i can already tell you're either half-queer or just an aspie

its a girl, who gives a shit? possibility for a threesome if you weren't so beta that a fucking girl is intimidating you

lmaoing @ ur life

>>17470697
Don't listen to all of the liberal degenerates in this thread. If you're uncomfortable with it and your girlfriend isn't apologetic or doesn't care, maybe it's time to dump her.
It's not like being monogamous is much to ask.

>>17471004
>bisexual

Also known as pleasure seekers. You have no sense of loyalty and you should really only be dating other bisexuals.

OP had every right to get pissed about a lesbian kissing his girlfriend and fuck you for trying to lie to him.

You overreacted. She apologized, and you dragged it out because "it will never happen again" somehow wasn't good enough for you. The fuck do you even want her to do about it? She can't take it back. And someone else surprise-kissing your girlfriend almost destroys your trust in your girlfriend?

Find your chill, damn.

>>17470703
You should have accepted the first apology and moved on with your life. Pressing the matter just makes you look like a jealous asshole. You weren't really wrong or anything, but you could have been a little more forgiving.

>>17471080
This. You're being an asshole by dragging it on. The girl has apologized, what else did you want from her? She can't unkiss your girlfriend. It's hard to tell you what to do right now because at this point it's a clusterfuck.

If you want to keep your girlfriend you should apologize to the girl for being so harsh and to the best friend as well. And don't blame your girlfriend just because she saw the message and said it was fine: if you write it and you send it, it's your responsibility, she only advised you. Tell them the whole atmosphere of the bars you were in made you feel uncomfortable and tell them how they'd feel if a girl kissed their boyfriend like that.

If this is how you usually solve your problems I can understand how your GF's best friend has issues with you. The girl made a terrible mistake, but you're even more in the wrong by refusing to accept an apology. If you still feel like anyone "owes" you, suck it up or you'll lose your sweetheart.

>>17470703
It also sounds like the best friend is jealous of you and is using this as an excuse to steal your girlfriend. I would say cut your losses and tell them all to go fuck themselves. Take this as a lesson to never date a bisexual. The stereotype about them being promiscuous exists for a reason.

>>17470697
>gf kisses another girl
>mad
lolwut. this is a good thing.

>>17470932
>>17471052
Its not about being liberal or cucks, it's about being mature, not over reacting and being a drama queen about accidents, you literal autists. Do you guys even have girlfriends?

>>17471004
>drunken kiss
Take responsibility for your life, you piece of shit

>>17470697

This is a case where they gave you an inch (giving you the moral high-ground and admitting what they did was fucked up), then you tried to take a mile (trying to make yourself feel better and take out some rage on her by guilt tripping her in to making her feel worse about something she already apologized for), and then got seen through and had i blow up in your face.

You should have quit while you were ahead, instead you tried to browbeat and kicker her when she already down and lost, completely negated any sympathy and destroying any moral high ground you had, making you a self-righteous asshole.

And then you doubled down on that when you started bringing up HIGHLY PERSONAL, EMOTIONAL, and SENSITIVE subjects like gender identity, and how her actions are a reflection of everyone else with her same associations....

In case you're this oblivious, that's about the most high-handed, judgmental, and intolerant thing you could have done.

You effectively turned a personal issue in to an attack on a gender identity--so of course they're going to get pissed off.


Use your fucking brain next time, calm the fuck down before you speak, and think things through.


Yeah the friend fucked up, but if this results in a breakup with your girlfriend, that's totally on you and the way you conducted yourself afterward.


That being said, if your GF is really flip flopping that hard on you, maybe your'e better off without her. If you want this to work, you better get your head out of your ass, get off your high horse, and apologize for being such a social retard though.

dating a bixesual?
what a beta

you got what you signed up for nigga

>>17470697
>TL;DR : Girlfriend got kissed by another girl I got pissed off and we left.
You got pissed off? I don't know about you but that sounds fucking great my nigga

>>17472201
Not if you're looking for a long term relationship.

>>17471264
Yes I do and she would never be caught dead having a lesbian kiss her and I would be pissed as all hell if a degenerate tried to make a move on my girl in front of me too.

Queers don't get the same treatment as normal people because they don't play by the same rules to begin with.

Girl wanted to steal your GF, she played you real nice. Better apologize m8, cut your losses.

Also the whole dudes-grabbing-you situation was to put you over the edge and the phone loss was planned as well

>>17472236
This. I was with a bi girl for a while and ended up destroying the relationship because I couldnt bear a threesome (FFM; me being male) because I was truly looking for something long-term.

It really depends on your relationship goals. If you want it open to girls only because of a bi GF, then itll work, if you want the traditional relationship, then its harder to keep jealousy in.

>stick with straight girls if you want a real relationship

>stick with bi girls if you like to fuck around alot.