Cheaters.

OP here btw. I am a girl and was the one cheated on. Just want to understand the mind of a cheater who regrets it.

this board isn't the place for generals like this

go to >>/soc/ for stuff like that

/adv/ is here specifically to provide advice.

never cheated on anyone but i helped other people cheat multiple times. i feel guilty and i understand that i am a piece of shit, but the idea that you're not supposed to be doing it makes it that much hotter.

that said i dont think i could do that to someone i was in a relationship with unless they really deserved it somehow.

No but I have been the one cheated on and the one that got away.

>>17442083
in writing yeah but this fits the tone of /adv/ a million times better than /soc/ if you haven't noticed

@OP

I have had urges to cheat, because I felt slighted. My girlfriend would solve upsets with me by shouting at me, or fall asleep after orgasm and leave me there. This was all about her as a person and not some intentional mistreatment of me...I mean for one it's not her fault she was so tired.

So, I would get bitter and angry this would happen, and there was nothing to do with this frustration. I couldn't will more energy or conflict resolution skills into her. She could be more selfless, but she barely took care of herself, so did I really want that?

So I was feeling frustrated, a little grumpy, mistreated and horny. I started flirting with other girls.

However, I ended up telling on myself to her before anything happened. I think that prevents a lot of stuff from going wrong. A lot of overeaters keep their overeating a secret.

I felt some kind of strong social responsibility to not cheat, and an urge to tell her about things that would potentially hurt her. I think this is what people who are socially healthier have.

>>17442111
I dumped this person btw. I think the urge to cheat is typical in a relationship that you're considering ending.

>>17442111
i mean there's better boards to vent on.

or blog post for the matter.

/soc/ is literally the center for egotists who want an audience for their blog posts; a thread like this is suited over there much better

>>17442116
I think you misread the tone

the pic says OP is sulking, and the text says she wants to discuss the psychology of cheating

if that doesn't sound /adv/ to you, you haven't been here long enough

/soc/ is for talking about superficial things and taking pictures of your dick

>>17442123
i mean you can claim all you want that the /adv/ you know revolves around discussion of superficial topics but dude let's look at it plainly

>this thread is in no way asking for advice on any certain topic

therefore a thread like this isn't suited to this board. If that's all you think /soc/ is then maybe you haven't been there long enough.

This thread is a blog post generator; take it to a board that allows blog posts and actively encourages them like /soc/

the picture means absolutely nothing; this isn't an english literature class. Regardless of what she wants to discuss she can take it to a general thread on one of the many other boards suited for the topic.

>>17442134
>reads your post
>opens first page of /soc/
nope

explain what I already know all you want, but /soc/ is a pisspot for anything but pictures of camwhores and we should take refugees I mean we're pretty shit as-is

>>17442143
i'd rather not clutter this board anymore than it already is

/adv/ is centered around robots and attention whores. OP sounds like one from /soc/ if anything

funnily enough after going and checking /soc/ i found this

>>24172311

rip

>>17442150
shit i messed up the link

either way the same thread's already in /soc/

>>17442152
I asked there because you told me that is an appropriate place. Didn't even see what gets posted there. Sorry for my mistake for posting it here. Don't usually post, just read.

>>17442159
women are such blind followers Jesus Christ

you're supposed to shout, "STOP DERAILING MY THREAD CUNTFACES" and post something really biting and snarky about how we're losers

they'll never get it

>>17442111
I understand your feels. I too have these types of issues with my girlfriend and, like you, I just told her before any serious cheating other than texts and naked pictures happened.

Twice I've felt slighted and abused (like you) to the point where I wanted to cheat. Both times I told her out of conscience. Both times she got pissed at first, but then realized I could have just fucked these women and not told her at all.

Then that lead to conversations about why I felt the need to cheat, which were valid relationshit issues. That lead to us healing, deciding we wanted to be together, and figuring out how to be together.

But make no mistake... if she doesn't make good on the promises she's made me she's getting dumped just like you did.
>>17442066
>>17442080
Why do you need him to regret it so that you can move on and come back better and stronger?

(stop)

>>17442186
>lawful neutral
yeah, edgelords make me want to put a finger down my throat

they think they can just abuse every system they're in and misuse it. they probably run a higher risk of being negative net total rather than a positive one.

that's something I am constantly working to not be. other people matter too...

File: 1469754157278.jpg (31KB, 512x384px) Image search: [Google]

31KB, 512x384px

>>17442111

>@OP

>>17442066
only one when I was 17 and so in love with a guy my chest ached. He was 18 and went away for university and we stayed together but I would get lonely when he couldn't come home on weekends. My bf didn't want me to sit at home and was ok I went out with friends and had fun but warned me about only one guy that had chased me for years. I didn't really like the guy but he kept after me and asked me out every week and I finally agreed to go out with him. I was miserable the whole time and felt guilty when I let him kiss me when he dropped me off at home. I lied to my bf about what I did that night and who I was with and for a month thought I got away with it but one of his friends heard the guy bragging about taking me out and my bf broke up with me. He told me he could have forgiven me had it not been this guy he warned me about. He wouldn't listen to my apologies. He was the man I should have married and had his children but I was stupid and selfish. I didn't even sleep with the guy I went out with.

>>17442080
they don't value you enough. Regret is just them realizing you are long term vs the short term fun they had. Don't give yourself to a disgusting cheater like that. But no, I would never cheat on someone I truly love.

>>17442544
Do you tell people you start relationships with that you've cheated in the past? Not as an ice breaker or something, but within the first few weeks?

>>17442080
hello I'm a virgin so I wouldn't know. are you a qt?

>>17442066
I have never cheated, but I have been tempted to, and at one point was even considering it.

Here's kind of how it works, at least for some people:
>Be in relationship
>Relationship gives you confidence, builds you up
>Start feeling way more confident and comfortable with yourself
>Overanalyze and put yourself down less and less
>Sexual experience makes you feel more capable as a lover
>Capability as a lover turns to pride, now you have a skill that women want
>Start getting more and more female attention because of either the confidence buildup or because I swear to god women can smell the pheromones or something emanating from a man in a relationship, and even if its a guy they would have never looked twice at, suddenly they're throwing warm glances and smiles his way whenever they meet his eyes
>Basically you feel like you're a million times "better" in every way than you were when you started the relationship
>You have enough of a conscience that you think it would be unfair to "move up" just because you feel that you can do better now
>Current relationship also acts as a kind of safety net, so that you know you have nothing to lose and can try all the high-risk-high-reward flirty things you would never do before
>Start to feel like it would be unfair to deny the world your affections, with so many more sexually appealing women you suddenly have a chance with who are also now interested in you
>Really sexy girl comes up to you while you're out somewhere
>Starts coming onto you really hard
>Can't bring yourself to turn down the kind of woman you've always dreamed of fucking
>"What would one night of sex hurt? It's not like a relationship on the side or a regular thing. I'll just fuck this one girl and no one has to know."
>The taboo of the cheat-sex, the danger, risk, and especially novelty, make it essentially some of the most psychologically-stimulating and best sex you've ever had
>Crave more
>Snowballs out of control

>>17442066
I cheated on my (now) wife for the first 6 months of our relationship. I was still fucking my ex on the regular because she was a beast in bed. No romance or anything. just fucking. My wife is no where near as good as this chick in bed. Anyway, I'd still be doing it if not for the fact my ex is with someone else now and didn't want to be a cheater. My wife does not have the slightest clue that this ever happened. I don't have a desire to pursue other women because there's no guarantee they will be the tiger in bed that my ex was, and it's not worth my time dealing with some other chick just to see if she's good in the sack. I've been with enough women to know most of them are god awful in bed. So I'm faithful now.

But if that ex ever stepped back in to my life, you can bet I'd hit it as long as I could. I get the best of both worlds. My wife is a great person, treats me incredibly, etc. But easy, amazing sex is too good to pass up. Why not have both?