being to harsh on my gf

>>17433114
dude.. nice guys finish last is more about younger girls chasing after the assholes until the nice guy has a good career.

i don't if you fucked up, but once u got the girl, u should've put the games aside.

faggot.

>>17433114
Nice guys finish last is about assertiveness, not being a dick for being a dicks sake

yeah no girl wants to hear that you as her boyfriend think she's fat. you're a piece of shit. you mentally broke this girl down and that's abusive behavior. she deserves better.

Or, ya know, you could tell her why you're an absolute douchebag to her instead of just saying you're sorry.

Being an asshole just to be an asshole doesn't get girls, it's just about confidence

>>17433114
No OP this is perfect. Break her down. Now she will never leave you or cheat. Plus she probably loves it. Women love being treated like garbage.

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>>17433114
this tastes suspiciously like pasta

wow you actually call her fat? honestly, best approach with a girlfriend is to not compliment very much, but dont call your girlfriend fat unless she actually is.. she still likes you so just dont be a jerk or she wont be very fun to be around since she'll have no self confidence

>>17433144
>wow you actually call her fat?

I didn't directly say that, I said things like "well, why aren't you going to the gym lately? Why are you eating all this high saturated fat for breakfast?"

>>17433154

thats even worse lol

>>17433154
>>high saturated fat for breakfast
fucking keked, thanks m8 lmao

>>17433114
>I sometimes mock her once in a while and call her fat (although she isn't), she normally doesn't say anything and goes about her way, except now.
What the fuck? I'd immediately dump you for that kind of mental abuse.

>>17433154
>"well, why aren't you going to the gym lately? Why are you eating all this high saturated fat for breakfast?"
Being a food Nazi is just as bad. Because you're still calling her fat without the balls to actually come out and say it.

No it's not that nice guys finish last. It's that you have no self confidence and think that being an asshole is being confident

>>17433114
You're playing mind games with her. Mind games breed distrust and resentment, nothing more. Stop fucking with her and her emotions if you care about her at all. Compliment her when you want to compliment her and give her constructive criticism when you genuinely think she needs it.

Nice guys don't always finish last, but confident, charismatic, and genuine guys always finish first. The two are not mutually exclusive.

>>17433135
sadly, this here is true.
she will try her best to keep looking attractive trying to meet your "standards".

>>17433377
That's not love. Love isn't about destroying another human being's self-esteem

>>17433114
You have actually make it to the next level. Now she thinks that you are out of her reach and will try to overcompensate ot through gifts,cooking or allow you to do nasty things in bed. Congratulations.

>>17433412
Some people have none, and that's the only way to work with them, you dunce.

One of my last exes did exactly this. I started off a jerk,(never called her fat, was legit one of the hottest girlfriends I had, but she was dumb and that's easy to play on) she would tell all of her friends, I would even crack on her in front of them and she would make this :O face, amazed I had the balls to say this kinda crap, and she loved it.
After a while, her "friends" started to complain about how I treated her, now even her, so I lightened up a little. Guess who got bored and cheated on me not long after? Girls are fickle, meng. Note, this is just one example in a sea of history. You never hear about some chick (excuse my /pol/) essentially cucking a guy, but as soon as she actually wants to fuck HIM, he goes, "woah, that wasn't apart of the deal".

The key is moderation.

Don't be too nice and yet don't intentionally fuck with her

>>17433444
Until another guy shows up, which WILL happen more likely than not, and decides to be a lot nicer to her and listen to her and show her she can be with someone that will treat her nice and make her feel appreciated.

Exact thing happened to me. I left a man I was with for 3 years that treated me like shit more often than not, for a man that was there for me and showed me I didn't have to be treated like garbage. I stayed with the asshole so long because I thought what he said was true, that I was too ugly to be with anyone else, that I wasnt worth anyones time and I was lucky he even gave a shit enough to let me be with him.

>>17433144
Basically this. You can be mean in a fun way but if you are throwing out compliments all the time and constantly saying I love you, they either think it's fake or it overwhelms them

>>17433114
It's more like "Unassertive, boring guys who do nothing but put their girls on a pedestal, finish last". Because no one likes to be just admired like a trophy and not actually understood.

But apparently, you've decided that it's impossible to treat your girl like an equal. You've decided "either I put her on a pedestal, or put her way below me, mentally abusing her, treating her like shit"

What do I mean by equal? Well guys certainly know how to treat their male friends, but not girls, somehow. Which is quite puzzling. So what I mean is, cracking jokes in good humor but knowing those jokes won't be taken personally (instead of making those "jokes" that you know most girls would be genuinely hurt by). Actually having a meaningful relationship with them instead of just thinking "wow u so pretty" and treating like a trophy. I'm not asking that you treat them exactly like a guy friend, but there's a lot you can learn and adapt from there.

>>17433819
you subconsciously wish you were with your more alpha former bf

don't lie

>>17433834
"equality" in relationships = getting cucked

>>17433819
Odds are she comes back to him leaving the guy or not.

>>17433843
Well I suppose that if you completely destroy a girl's psyche and trap her in a whirlwind of an abusive relationship, she won't cheat on you, so I guess you can do that if you're a sociopath

Actually read what I wrote, most people who go "well I listened to the feminists and treated her equally and then everything went to shit!" actually mean the advice that radical feminists give, in which they demand that guys worship the girls and then they call it "equality". Of course it's not. Getting told I was "pretty" and "cute" and little else besides that, with him showing little interest in what I said, beyond saying that it's nice that I'm happy- well that's not equality and it wasn't fulfilling. I rather he gave me the conversational substance that he gave his male friends

>>17433840
>>17433855

I only wanted to share to show there are women that don't want to be treated like garbage or have some balance of being treated nice then like shit. Some women will take it and some may even like it; but some will grow tired of it and leave.

>>17433114
you did good op you are not a nice guy and you still got to bang her. nice guys get screw over in the end anyways and women see kindness as weakness.

>>17433889
I know, what i mean is that being abusive is an effective way to make a someone (specially girls) stay with you.
It's bad for both parties but it works.

>>17433901
this

time to turn up the abusiveness!

>>17433114
>Did I fuck up?

Yes. Yes you did.

>>17433819
lel thanks for proving that nice guy finish last the asshole got the first pick and the nicer guy has to deal with your emotional baggage and your leftovers.

>>17433834
>What do I mean by equal? Well guys certainly know how to treat their male friends, but not girls, somehow
Every time, and I mean EVERY TIME I've treated a women like I treat my male friends; that is, expecting an adult human being with skin thicker than their make up, I get the same response: "you're too harsh".
No matter how much you want to pretend you want to be treated like every other person in our lives, it's very clear you want us to filter ourselves, specially when talking or joking about body shapes.
I remember a girl I thought was a very strong individual with a proper personality got utterly "destroyed" -according to our common friends- when I said she had a fat ass -which she fucking does- while joking.
Whenever I call my fat friends "fat and disgusting whales" they don't start crying and talking behind my backs.
Whenever someone calls me a "bitter asshole" I don't go around crying, whenever girls call me a manlet I don't start talking shit behind their backs; it's all supposed to be in good fun, and even when they are trying to do harm, it doesn't hurt me.
I'm sorry, but I won't treat a women like I treat my male friends ever again, because it's only brought me bad looks, bad words and bad situations; I will treat you girls like what you are, emotional children.

>>17433916
But the nice guy still won? Everyone has emotional baggage. Wether its from mommy not loving you enough or your ex treating you like shit.

>>17434269
He got the same girl except that she is ridden with problems now, he didn't won. Like the anon said, leftovers.

>>17434221
Or maybe you are the emotional child? It sounds like youre an attention whore, to feel the need to make crude jokes just for the attention value of "lol cant believe you said that, so true!" Then getting butt hurt because someone didn't give you the desired response and attention.

>>17434285
So getting a girl that isnt a virgin is a loss because she is leftovers.

>>17434304
No, getting an abused person is.

>>17433114
You don't be mean to a girl to keep them.

You be assertive and dominant in the dating/courting stage (this is where nice guys finish last does come into play) but once you bag them, you maintain a healthy relationship to keep them, not put them down.

>>17434297
>you are the emotional child
Nice projection, hamplanet.
I said jokes, not "crude jokes", learn how to read. And, guess what, men joke around all the time, and even the smallest jokes are offensive to women.
And no, I don't make jokes "to get attention", unlike women, I don't need attention. I make jokes to have fun, and I know fun is a weird thing for women. And, surprise, surprise, I don't go around making jokes all the time, only when the situation calls for it, but with women, a joke is NEVER called for.
I don't get butthurt when I make a joke or a comment and a bitch starts crying, I couldn't care less, hamplanet; cry all you want, I won't stop making jokes about fatties and retards, just like I won't bitch around for being the butt of the joke once in a while.
I get it you don't function properly among men, but the "desired response" to a joke is to be an adult and laugh if off if it was funny, say "it wasn't funny" if it wasn't funny or tell the other person straight up if you felt insulted.
You didn't counter argue anything that I said, you just cried like the woman you are because you know that when you are treated like men, you start bitching -like you are doing now.
Just be fucking honest with the world -and men- and tell every body you don't want to be treated like our male friends, but in a special-snowflake manner.

>>17434333
you are getting extremely offended that people get offended

ayy lmao

on top of this, you use one example of a stupid woman and generalize about 50% of humanity

>>17434378
Oh, I'm not getting offended that people get offended, I'm just telling you that you don't actually want to get treated like my male friends:
>treat me like you treat your friends
>but leave out the passionate/aggressive way of speaking
>leave out the jokes, specially the ones directed at fatties
>leave out the constructive comments about being fat
>filter your speech and follow MY ways of speaking
>but treat me like you treat your friends
The only group of people I treat like this are children, and women constantly tell me to follow this guide lines, therefore I'll treat women like children.
I'm not using "one example of stupid woman", I'm just not going to write all of my experiences, but, in summary, I've yet to find a women I could ACTUALLY treat like I treat my friends. I cannot talk loud, I cannot joke about anything, I cannot cuss or I'm deemed to be "problematic".
The day I find a women I can talk to like I talk to my friends, I'll believe I'm generalizing.

>>17433114
Nah you'll lose her like that, i took that stupid internet advice too and lost my ex from being an asshole.

The advice is simply misunderstanding women.

they do want a boyfriend who is somewhat a jerk, but not to them, just to other people, a guy who won't take shit and will put people in their place, but themselves want affection and kindness from you, however without being able to walk all over you.

>>17434333
My girlfriend can't handle any jokes about her but yes men do joke around more harshly with each other. Woman tend to be crybabies in comparison.

>>17434429
best advice in the thread

>>17434429
That's sad desu

>>17433154
>saturated fat is unhealthy

nice mem

In my opinion the games never stop. It's harsh and ridiculous. I agree. But attraction is fleeting and it can die the moment you start pouring your feelings and emotions into her. Women want the security that comes with dating a decider, someone who takes what he wants and is able to stand on his own while being strong enough to be supportive.

It's harsh but the fact that your girlfriend has that little nuance at the back of her mind of always being slim fit and attractive for you is what's making her stay with you. Once she acquires the "I'm beautiful in his eyes" security she will immediately lose attraction to you and will stop trying to "look beautiful" because she already got that from you.

Women are fickle, fleeting little emotionally driven creatures. It's just how it works. You need to be strong enough to eat up her tears like soup.

>>17434699
It's a disgusting state of affairs, we all forget at times, since we truly are such a civilized and advanced species - that we are indeed a species at all, a species of animals who follow animistic tendencies sculpted into our subconscious through evolution, the same as all other animals.

>>17433114
>Did I fuck up?
You've been fucking up the whole time. "Nice guys finish last" is just something the bitter unfuckables say to deflect responsibiliry for their own failures.

I'm sorry, OP, but really, what you need to do is leave. She will heal with time, but not as long as her abuser is present: you will only fall back into the bad old patterns. If you love her, let her go. And then learn how to treat women for the next.

You can tease girls about certain things no problem, but insulting their appearance is 100% a fastline ticket to getting cheated on. And she will rationalize it and blame you.

Yes, you're an abuser.

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>>17433121
>until the nice guy has a good career.
Right on the money anon.
Pun intended.

OP your an idiot, stop fucking listening to everyone else.

When it comes to relationships, it means "boring people who fail to assert themselves finish last."

Being a prick randomly is not the way to avoid this.

>>17434402
this is late but- do you /actually/ have /any/ jokes that are not about people being fat? Because that's how you sound like and therefore you sound unimaginative. And of course, girls tend to be more sensitive particularly about fat jokes, a fat guy is still seen as more valuable than a fat girl, so fat is a less of a deal to guys. There are topics that guys are more sensitive about. If you said that some of the things I do, make me seem or look like a guy, I wouldn't mind at all. But try telling a guy that he has a girly body, I did, as a compliment actually, but he took it so hard

>>17436064
Cause not eating like a pig is so hard.