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Hey /adv/ I don't really post here, but I come with a question.
I've been dating a girl for 3 years in September, since I was 18, I'm now 21. We've been through a few things since. A year and a half ago I joined a Skype group and there's a bunch of guys we'd game together it was cool and stuff. Eventually a 30 year old woman who was married and had a kid joined the Skype group and we talked and it was cool. Eventually she opened up about how her husband was boarderline abusive, he's missing work, and he yells at her, and is scared for her child and shit. I listened, and I was her shoulder to cry on. She told me stuff I told her it would be okay. I will say that there were a few hearts sent on both sides, like for example she'd say things like "thanks so much <3" and such, and I'd sent hearts back like "don't even worry about it <3" a few of those. I don't remember because there may have been a joking love you from her in there and a joking love you too somewhere in there. But that being said, I had absolutely no feelings for her. She lived halfway across the continent and was 10 years older than me married with a kid. Anywho, my girlfriend goes through my Skype. She scrolls through he messages seeing a few hearts and shit. She was so upset. She said I cheated on her emotionally even though I told her many many times that I had no feelings for her. My girlfriend is a dream girl down to the name. I'd never cheat on her or play her in any way. Anyways shortly after that we broke up because she felt I cheated on her and couldn't get over it. 2 months later we got back together saying we'll never be apart ever again. That was August of last year. Now this April, things started to get weird very suddenly. Halfway through April she just stopped answering my messages, and wouldn't answer me knocking on her window, etc. It's been 3 and a half months and we've had minimal talking. She said she needs time to figure things out and get her head clear. (1/2)
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(2/2) her messages have given me the impression that she doesn't want to break up with me, but she doesn't feel it's fair to me that I have to sit here basically suffering emotionally. I don't know what to do. I never cheated on her, I never liked another female, I always loved her but I don't know what to do. She thinks I cheated on her. I swear to god I'm being truthful to you guys. Anyone have any tips?
>TL;dr girlfriend thinks I was flirting with a girl on Skype when I was just trying to help her through her husbands abuse a year and a half ago and keep her kid safe. Girlfriend says I "emotionally cheated" on her. We haven't spoken in 3 months because she's been trying to get over that event. Is this relationship salvageable?
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>>17429955
It's taken her 3 months to get her head clear, won't talk to you, and all you did was have conversations with people?
What was this Skype group? Why did she go through your messages?
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>>17429989
Yeah I really think she overreacted which scares me. 30 year old married mother who lived in the south (I'm Canadian)
It was a gaming group. A bunch of guys from the states and she joined. And she just looked when I was in the bathroom.
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>>17429989
But I swear I'm not trying to make her look bad. This is an anonymous image board so I'm not gaining anything over making her look like shit. and typing that out made me see how a little over the top she is about the whole thing. To be honest I think she skimmed over the messages for the hearts and stuff. I never meant those hearts to be like affectionate. I meant them in an I care kind of way.
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But did you ask WHY she suddenly decided to go through your private messages? Do you think it was the first time she did that?
It just feels weird that you two spend 3 years without issues, then she decides to look at your stuff and going apeshit for a few ascii hearts thrown into a seemingly innocent conversation.
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>>17430049
Sorry, I read your post again and realized the whole thing has been going on for a while.
Still, if it went like you said it seems a bit over the top.
Do you have any female friends at school or at work?
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>>17430061
Yes I have a few through work, I start my schooling in September. What's up?
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>>17430061
None that I talk to often though. We get along because I'm pretty easy to talk to but I don't text or hangout with them
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Bump, honestly I don't know what to do, if anyone here has any input on the situation I'd love to hear from you. It's tearing my apart sitting here wondering and waiting for so long.
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Again, I'm going to sleep so I just hope the thread doesn't die
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Have a frank discussion with her. she's failing to communicate clearly, leaving you in doubt and the relationship in limbo. when that happens, the other partner has to be the one to reach out and establish communication. you both abused each other's trust-if you don't work through that together, the relationship will stagnate and eventually fall apart. don't assume or presume - TALK.
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>>17429943
Your ex is acting immature. You were only helping that 30 year old mother, being her shoulder to cry and all that. Why does she feel cheated? Did she feel like you weren't there for her while she needed a shoulder to cry on or some shit like that? If not, your ex is probably a very jealous type and will get jealous at similar situation like this one. It's likely she's been with someone else and is currently just grabbing you by your nose. Move on, and find someone else. Your relationship is sure to be doomed, because your ex will get jealous at every single thing. The best thing to do is to move on. Been there done that, it's hard, but it's for the better.
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>>17431118
>>17430761
>>17430761
I've actually told her the way that she deals with things is that she bottles things you and eventually once its too much she blows up and things like this happen and that she needs to communicate her feelings to me. I've knocked on her window at night, sent many texts, called her many times, I don't know what to do. She won't answer anything. I don't want to come over during the day because I know her parents know something is up. I want to talk to her but she doesn't. She wants to "clear her mind"
>>17431118
She feels cheated because I sent hearts to her and I think there was a "love you" in the messages somewhere but I don't remember. I think she only skimmed over the messages. The thing is she's really not the jealous type I know her. She just isn't taking my word about the whole thing. I know I'm a catch but I love her, I know I could move on, but I don't want to move on, I've been with her for the past 3 years of my life
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Bump. How do I get her to talk to me if she's basically refusing?
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Please I just don't know where to turn. I love her so much. We've planned our life together, our wedding, when we were getting back together last year we sat down, said things like we're never going to break up again. It's not worth living without each over. We would see old couples walking down the street and even though we were broken up, I wanted that to be me with her some day, and she wanted that to be me with her someday. We had such a passionate kind of love. It felt like magic. For 3 years. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. Honestly I want to fucking off myself. This sadness is so crippling. I feel like a worthless bag of shit. I can't get up and do my exercises on a daily basis, I wake up late and just go to work. I literally can't do this anymore but I don't want to live without her. It doesn't seem like an option in my brain. I'd rather die than leave her. I'm such a fucking sucker. Give me a fucking gun.
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Inquisitor Pegasus (ID: !!JCwpUw8u4T9)
2016-08-06 01:57:35
Post No.17432715
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>>17432701
>tfw normalfag gets what he deserves
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L0MK7qz13bU
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>>17432715
I thought this was a board where people actually talked to you about your problems not being cunts.
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Inquisitor Pegasus (ID: !!JCwpUw8u4T9)
2016-08-06 02:03:43
Post No.17432736
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>>17432728
You're looking for therapy, not 4chan
In the meantime, lol @ ur life retard
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>>17432736
>Tripfag
>Weeb
Literally fucking cancer
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Inquisitor Pegasus (ID: !!JCwpUw8u4T9)
2016-08-06 02:08:19
Post No.17432751
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>>17432742
I am the cure
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>>17431436
How do you joke about loving someone and not remember if you wrote it or not. Doesn't add up and hearts are flirtatious too. Whether you had feelings for the other woman or not you clearly overstepped some boundary with your gf.
Thread posts: 22
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