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Anonymous
help needed, lost gay guy 2016-08-04 20:02:04 Post No. 17427929
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help needed, lost gay guy 2016-08-04 20:02:04 Post No. 17427929
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Anons, I need help.
I'm M 25 and gay. I live in a big, cool city full of gays and am told that I'm handsome and get hit on. I get told that I'm smart and great for deep conversations and have good grades. But for years now I am miserable, even though I am in therapy. I have never had a boyfriend and my sex life is so bad that I started doing escort sutff. Including BDSM in groups and it went up to 13 young guys orgies. But still, I am never capable of coming. Only when I masturbate. I am blocked, maybe it is internalized homophobia, self hate. As a teen I cut myself and still sometimes do it. I take meds, duloxetine antidepressants. I have sexual drive, they don't block it. It's in my head. I have problems trusting people and my best friends are the ones from high school I rarely see. I haven't finished my degree in years, only now it's slowly happening. I feel ridiculous, like a baby. I often spend the day sleeping, whenever I can. I have semester break and haven't left the house for 4 days after traveling and seeing my old friends and barely eat anything. I don't know what to do. I have anxieties and self-hate and meds and therapy don't help.
How does this sound? What can I do? What would you do? Any feedback?
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if thereapy doesn't work, the only suggestions are finding other therapists, are focusing on yourself.
have you considered not focusing on such extreme sexual activities? i do a lot of those things as well (Save for the escorting) but its not for everyone
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>>17427962
yes I just want normal dates, but I am too scared that I will be blocked and can't come. I just need some care, hugs and kisses for now maybe. But I can't write that in dating profiles haha
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>>17427976
you literally can. you can also just not go to the sex. ask a guy on a date, then drop him off. or if he tries to make a move say 'lets wait'.
you may feel like you're using him, but is he not using you for sex? just do what makes you happy anon, stop worrriny about 'OH I CANT WRITE THAT ON A PROFILE'
i consistently go to the gay club, pick up a guy, and then refuse to have sex with him. and i like sex. A LOT. but after a beer or two its not enjoyable for me. i even warn them that we wont be having sex but yeah.
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>>17427985
thanks, I will try this, if I just wasn't so pussy, my anxiety will keep me from acutally going out and dating the guy. let alone going to the club/bar alone. It will get better but the past days have been tough.
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>>17428006
get a piece of paper and a marker and in big letters write
'do it anyways'
tape it to your wall, your mirror, or anything you see several hundred times a day.
it encourages you to think about what you're doing.
good luck man
>tfw no kinky bf to ho around with
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>>17427929
what city do you live in?
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>>17428051
Berlin
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