ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

Dear womens,
Eat shit and get rekt

>>17416136
you sound booty blasted, did your girlfriend dump you?

>>17416160
No, your mom "forgot" to take her pill again

>Close friends with this chick
>Becoming a bit frustrated with her, and want to set up some distance so I can focus on my own stuff
>My mother however adores her
>Cannot attend family functions without her being invited
Send help

Guys: Say if you were German, and a girl approached you out of the blue asking if you speak German at a uni you were studying abroad in, would you assume that she was flirting with you or looking for German conversation partners?

>>17416197
Conversation partner.
I speak Deutsch as a second language.

>>17416197
I would be convinced she wanted my dick if she was hot. Why? Hot girls don't have to ask for help

>>17416173
kill someone.
Anyone involved, you, her, your mom, doesnt matter, issue will be solved 100%

>>17416197
>Say if you were German, and a girl approached you out of the blue asking if you speak German at a uni you were studying abroad in, would you assume that she was flirting with you or looking for German conversation partners?

It would depend entirely on what colour German I am, in this hypothetical scenario...
White German, I'd just assume you're using me and hate me.
"tanned" German, I'd assume you want the Big Tanned German Cock and act accordingly, as "tanned" German people do.

GIRLS

Is it autistic / creepy if I visit the linkedin profile of a girl who works in the same office complex as me?

She will get a notification to say I have visited her profile if I do.

I don't have any other social media but she seemed to want to get to know me last year (I know, a long time ago) and I acted cold and indifferent and now I don't see her any more. I thought this may be (an admittedly retarded) way of letting her know I notice her and that I'm curious if she's left her company.

Please respond.

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QUICK QUESTION

I went on a date with a grill the other day, we made out and we kissed before I went back home, and I'm going to see her tomorrow again, should I greet her with a kiss on the lips or how?

Also how do I eat pussy properly?

>>17416334
See >>17415193

>>17416350

Well that's definitely TLDR but I want to read it just to get a boner

>lonely as fuck
>start talking to a girl online
>she's very friendly
>take the friendliness as romantic desire
>know I shouldn't
>keep doing it

this probably doesn't belong here but I just want some fucking help

to women:

how young can a guy be before its creepy?
(say you're 35-40 and the guy is 20)

is it creepy even if the guy looks young? but is late twentys?

>>17416329

Move on bro. Connections should be spontaneous, mutual and a product of good times

There are literally millions of other women out there

>have sex with gf
>dont usually come during sex because of years of furious death-grip fapping
>she does that thing i like
>lose it
>shoot my load deep inside her
>she immedeatly gets up and tries to wash it all out
>ask her if shes okay, she says yes, it only burns a little
>is visibly wincing and cringing every time she moves around

Is my cum made of acid? What did i do wrong here?

>>17416536
Idk that sounds weird, I'm not a biologist or a girl but it sounds like maybe part of her vagina dried out so it lacks protective shit

>>17416536

its fucking gross if you're not used to it

eg most guys would need to be paid a lot of money to taste their own cum

>>17416545
I tasted mine, it wasnt so bad. Not even that salty. Of course, that was years ago and afaik cum changes a lot from day to day.

>>17416545
Jokes on you it's my fetish

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GIRLS,

why do we need to manipulate you to get some casual sex? I don't expect to approach most girls like, "Hey, I'm X, you're hot as hell, wanna fuck?" and get an honest answer but if I do the
>ask them to get a coffee
>go to a place being all "hahaha" to prove i'ts fun to be with me
>casually talk about shiny things I have, how important/cool my job is and mention money is not a problem. Basically I'm alpha
>"let's go and do this shit but have you tasted this and this?! Yeah, this is my favorite wine, you like it too?" Just to get you horny
>go back to my place to get some se-I mean coffee
TL;DR Why do we have to trick you to bed when we want some one night fun, why can't we be honest, fuck and resume our lives?

>>17416559
*If we do all that, we'll score most of the time because of "feeling" just to run away as soon as we finish cumming

>>17416559
I'm a guy but my guess is that the slutty people who actually do that want to give off at least an illusion of not being a whore because promiscuity can be very unattractive

>>17416559
Because if she just put out on the spot, you'd be back here tomorrow shitposting about what a slut she is and what whores women are for fucking randos.

By rolling it into a "date," it doesn't seem as loose.

Say what you want about it, that's 100% true. And it's because of the way guys treat women who just want casual sex.

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>>17416160
Its best not to feed the trolls lol. They'll get bored and go away if you just ignore them.

>>17416545
>implying

>>17416545
Looks like you have to pay me millions because I guzzle my own cum hourly

>>17416329
If you havent had any meaningful contact irl in a long time, yeah I'd find it a little weird that this dude was creepin my social media.
If you work together or close together, why don't you just approach her irl?
>inb4 too scared
>>17416334
Hmm, not sure. I mean, I met up with a dude who's dick I sucked for a second time and felt a little weird about kissing him as a greeting personally.
To me a kiss greeting is usually for people who are super close. A kiss greeting is different from a kiss leading to something heavier, you know? But maybe that's just me and I have fucked up priorities.
And for the pussy eating I'd def recommend reading what the other anon posted. Shit gets me hot just reading it and imagining it happening to me.
>>17416436
Probably not directed at me since I'm in my early 20's myself, but my rule of thumb is (provided they're legal of course) no more than 5 older, 3 younger. But it's not that it's "creepy" to me, just that I'm not attracted to young guys, as for young looking, if you're a baby face that aint my game either. But I can't imagine being in my 30s and finding someone who looks like they're in their 20's unattractive. After all, 20's are the prime of your life. You'll never look as good as you were when you were around 23-25.
>>17416396
idk what kind of help you want man. You just have to work with yourself and force yourself to change this thought. Start by asking yourself why you feel this way, why do you think all friendly gestures=romantic? The answer is not "idk" dig deep there's something. Work from there.

>>17416536
Might just not be used to it, I mean have you ever done an enema for any reason? If you're not used to having that much liquid in a place it's gonna feel a little weird. Might be wincing because it feels gross, idk what she means by burning though. I'd get checked for an infection or something maybe if she still feels any kind of burning sensation later or if it happens again.
Also maybe when you came you thrusted a little too deep and hit the cervix or something and that was why she was wincing.
>>17416559
Kind of what everyone else said. Like it or not, believe it or not, there's still a bit of a stigma placed on casual sex. Even if you want it, you still have to pretend you don't in order to save face. I think it's dumb too, but hell, even I wouldn't openly admit to having casual flings or publicize my wants for sex if not purely because of my job.
Nobody wants to find out their kids 1st grade teacher's on tinder prowling for non committal dick.
That and what you're describing to me isn't "tricking" me into bed. It's me getting to know you in the slightest bit so I can know you're not the next Ted Bundy. Like, even if I'm just going to bang you for a night and never look, meet, talk to think about you ever again, I still want at least one coffee date to ensure you're not psychotic. And if you think that's too many loops to jump through for sex, you're probably better off buying a streetwalker who don't give a shit.
>>17416571
Well, it's not just guys. Women are jealous and catty little bitches too. They hear another girl got laid and they didn't? Oh hell no, she's just a slut so I can feel better about the fact I ain't getting any. You know? Hell, I'm actually more worried about women knowing I have casual sex than men. I've never once heard a man irl call a girl a slut, I have however found whole groups of women who will tag team on a member of their own group to ostracize for getting some.

After how long does it start becoming weird that someone is still single?

>>17416611
I too want to get some coffee/go to the movies/see a concert/go to a bar to dance/sing in a karaoke with someone fun, all while getting a little tipsy so I have more fun. I guess I get tired of leading.

Most girls go to a date to be amazed and get carried by the guy's plan, if they like it they'll fall on all the BS the guy can get them into.

And on the psycho part, if you bust one it's because the guy is still learning, he's not a psycho and he's just weird or he's just a creep. Otherwise, you just won't see it coming. A psycho doesn't care a bout anything, so manipulating/lying is natural as fuck and he will get you if he wants you...

>>17416634
Age wise, as in you never dated before? Post college, so like 25.
Time wise, as in you broke up and it took a long time to find someone new? Idk, I don't really find any gap that long to be weird. If anything it just makes you look like you had a rough break up and are actually putting effort into finding the next person you want to date and not just rebounding for the sake of rebounding.
But I could just be biased since I'm on a 5 year dry spell with no end in sight.

>>17416641
>all it's needed is to date once and it doesn't matter anymore
Fuck

>>17416570
>>17416571
As years go, I have and less energy to be fun/entertainer I have to in order to get some and as years pass girls seem to be getting tired of nth douchebag trying to impress me to drop my pants.
Both sides are getting tired of the other's BS, that's all I was trying to say.

Anyway, thanks all for the input

>>17416641
>Age wise, as in you never dated before?
More so gap. 24, been single since 19. Have a few things I want to finish before I really want to put that much effort into dating. So maybe another year on top of that.

>>17416639
I feel ya, socially dudes are expected to lead and I can see how it gets tiring.Random people I'm hooking up with though I find I'm just too shy to try to lead with.Random people I'm hooking up with though I find I'm just too shy to try to lead with. And I personally like to be led, sure, but I will take the lead whenever I'm comfortable with someone. I had an ex though once where I had to plan every single date, down to the last detail, and make sure it happened because I knew otherwise he wasn't going to. It was exhausting, and it always made me feel like he didn't even actually care if he saw me or not, so I understand your frustration. Maybe you have a type? If not try gunning for more confident looking/acting women. They might be more willing to at least share the burden of making the date happen.

Lol true, Bundy wasn't a great example since he was actually kind of brilliant and most of his vics would have never guessed what was coming to them. But that's what I meant by that, meeting to see if there are any red flags before I put myself in a vulnerable position.

>>17416643
It doesn't mean its hopeless, but yes, after a certain age if you've never even gone on a date before or had anything serious, it does raise questions.
Are they incredibly autistic? Are they super moral/religious? Do they not see the point in ever settling down with one person and only plan to have short flings all their life? Or is it just that they felt the need to focus on themselves, establish themselves as a person with their own independent interests and hobbies, work on their career, and are just now feeling stable and established enough to start dating?
Because if it's the last one then I'd say you're in the green. However given this is 4chan it's most likely the 1st one.

>>17416651
Then that's fine in my book. It's actually very admirable to want to work on yourself before trying to add another person to the mix.
I myself decided after my last break up I wanted to work on my plummeting body image before I tried dating again. After losing 60lbs I feel much better about my prospects. I'm still about 20lbs from where I want to be, but I feel more comfortable about putting myself out there now while I work off the rest.

>>17416660
I don't even care if i get a gf or have sex; i just want to stop lying or evading questions/hints about relationships and sex.

I'm 18, and my ex fiancee was 20. We still hang out and do a lot of relationship stuff.

But the other day she was in a bad mood and she was just being abrasive at me all the time. And she told me she wished I was about 10 years older, and that all of the guys she's gone out with since me have been older.

It's really making me feel insecure, because I can't help that I'm young and don't have much experience with relationships. And she said maybe the reason I was single was because I'm too quiet and I never talk. And if it bothers her so much, why does she still want to work things out? It felt like she was just trying to make me feel bad because she was upset with me.

Am I blowing things out of proportion or do I have reason to feel hurt by this?

>>17416679
Then don't evade, just be honest. Start the revolution and take the games outta dating; I'd back you on it. If you don't actually care about getting a gf or sex then you have nothing to lose really, if they ask just tell them you've never had a relationship before for X reason. If they think that's weird then who cares, you don't need them in your life anyways. If they're cool with that then great, you have a friend now.

>>17416697
>18
>ex fiance
Kek, gee I wonder why that feel apart.
Friend, you have many years to go out and find the right woman. If she's saying these things to you, whether it's to help you or hurt you, she's not the right one.
It's possible she feels guilty she could move on and you couldn't and feels the need to help you get back out there. Maybe shes frustrated because she actually likes you and the other dudes she's been dating haven't lived up to the relationship she had with you but feels like the both of you are just too young to be this committed. Who knows, like the faq says we can't read her mind.
If she's dating/fucking around though I'd say move on yourself. Either get back together or don't, don't hang around in limbo land. Chances are she's just using you as a back up, and wants to "work things out" only while she's inbetween guys so she doesn't feel lonely. That's the impression I get from the information given at least.

>>17416713
Part of the reason she ended the engagement was she was still seeing her ex and she knew it wouldn't stop and didn't want to hurt me.

We still both really want to have a family together and love each other. I let her keep the ring and she even wears it sometimes. She says I'm the love of her life and she's glad she's marrying me. But she just doesn't seem to think she's ready for the commitment, and I'm probably not either.

>>17416703
I'm talking about people in general not girls.
I don't look autistic enough to be expected to be a virgin if/when people know they judge you for it.

>>17416737
Not girls specifically*

I've got a girl I've been pretty affectionate with but not officially dating. I'll see her in person again in a few weeks and when I do, I want to change that. I know she's comfortable being touched by me, and since we're adults I don't want to pussyfoot around, so I figure I'll just put an arm around her and say "Hey, you know I like you, and I want to date you. Wanna do it?" Is there any reason NOT to do this?

I'd probably just fuckin' DO it, but since I have to wait for the chance I'm overthinking things on 4chan like a turd.

Girls

Say that you and a guy friend have had some attraction toward each other in the past. But over time things changed just cause of work/life and not being able to talk as much as you used to. But nothing bad happened or anything. Anyways, let's say you all meet up again and feel really comfortable around each other, looking at each other, laughing, and smiling. And you feel relaxed enough around him that you hook your arm through his while you hang out. Let's say you're both sitting down on a bench looking out at a river or something, would it be inappropriate for him to lean over and kiss you on the cheek as a test to see how you'd react ? Under these circumstances?

>>17416730
>18 & 20
>love
Dude. You haven't even begun to experience life yet man, you don't even know what love is you're both still basically children. Go sow your wild oats, get established in the world on your own, I mean you're either still in high school or only just graduated. Do you even live together? Or do you still live with your parents? Go to school, get a stable job that pays decently, buy a house, then start thinking about marriage, family, and "forever".
Also
>she was still seeing her ex and she knew it wouldn't stop
what the fuck does this mean. You mean she was cheating on you and openly admitted she wasn't going to stop? She doesn't love you then mate. Holy fuck don't get cucked at 18 man, you're far too young.

>>17416737
>>17416739
Either way my point still stands, don't lie to anyone, you certainly don't have to. I mean everyone's choices in life are to either conform or stop giving a fuck about other people's opinions. That's the only 2 choices you got, and if you can't do one then you have to do the other. Bitching about it isn't a choice.
>>17416772
Shia Labeouf it man. She'll more than likely be stoked to finally get out of the more than friends less than lovers purgatory.
>>17416789
The above applies to you too. Just do it already man.

>>17416559

Gotta do something to whittle down the amount of guy's who are willing to fuck any given girl.

But mostly it's establishing trust, and building an actual attraction. Men are generally more visual that women, so you charming them with your achievements is basically the equivalent of having big beautiful tits.

>>17416791
We were planning on living together after next year. We both live alone. I've been out of high school for a year.

Still. I know I should probably do what you're saying. And I shouldn't let it bother me so much. But I don't want to. Talking to other girls feels like a chore. And I don't want to cut her out totally either, because I still care a lot about her.

>>17416798
Not lying has no benefits, the truth is the worst thing to say 99.9999% of the times. That said i hate lying and most of the times i make some funny witty comment that takes the attention away from me.

>>17416834
Well then my advice to you is keep her around as a friend if you like her, but if she's fucking around she clearly is not that into you. You don't have to date anyone else if you don't want to, but I would advise against moving in with her if she is going to be sleeping/dating around. It will be very awkward for you, I promise. Establish your own lives independently of one another, actually experience the world as a single person, then when you're older if you want to come back around to one another, go for it.
There is absolutely no ungodly reason anyone should get married before 25. Statistically you're only setting yourself up for failure, and its even worse trying to get back into the dating world at 25 and explaining how this would be your second marriage.

>>17416835
If you really believe that then there's the reason you're miserable. It's the opposite m8, telling the truth is the right thing to say 99% of the time. The last 1% is usually dedicated to things like "Does this make me look fat?" and other unimportant bullshit that just saves your breath.

>>17416559

Imagine if most everything that came up to fuck you was very capable of (and statistically, overwhelmingly more likely to) killing you.

You'd have something approaching a screening process too.

>>17416843
Thanks for the advice man. I'll try to do that.

My biggest concern is we have a bad track record of being able to stay away from each other. And getting too close in a situation like this just makes things weird.

>>17416850
i doubt they would kill you if they could fuck you though

>>17416859
Again, you don't have to cut one another out all together, but again I would not live with someone you still have feelings for when they've moved on. Believe me, I lived in a fucking tv drama for a year when my two roomies broke up. She broke up with him, he still loved her, she was bringing back guys to fuck and he had to watch them leave her bedroom in the morning. Fucked him up real good.

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>>17416864

>>17416847
Who said anything about being miserable?
My whole life i always believed saying the truth is the right thing to do and i did that and never got anything good out of it; yge few times i lied that got me benefits.
I hate lying though so i avoid truth and lies.

Those unimportant things are huge part of daily comunication. You probably just don't realize that you are not being fully sincere most of the times.

>>17416772

Yo dude we have the same thing going on. That's crazy. I'm the poster below you

>>17416875
You sound pretty unhappy to me t b h. You feel like you've been cheated so you have to do something you don't like doing to function in life?
>You probably just don't realize that you are not being fully sincere most of the times
Honestly I feel there's a difference between lying and not bringing up certain things. While I'll agree the mundane things are the focal point in daily conversation, however even if you get caught up in too many white lies it'll kick your social life to the curb.
I honestly cannot think of a single thing I lie about on a daily basis, even the little shit. What do you lie about every day?
And when it comes to dating and sex, fuck no lying does not get you anywhere in the long run because that is not a mundane little thing.

>>17416876
Yeah, but mine's more ambiguous. We never were quite as overt as sitting with arms linked, but our interactions were blatant touchy flirting in every other way. In retrospect it was rather adorable. But I can't actually see her for a few weeks, and last we saw each other last under hard circumstances (mild injuries, which quickly killed the mood.) There was one particular night near the end where she made a cutsey face at me while I stroked her hair and rubbed her shoulder and I wish I had just grabbed her right then, but we were't alone so I pussed out. I'm kicking myself for this, but she's not stupid, and she won't have forgotten those moments.

Let's both just do the fucking thing.

>you have a better butt and flatter stomach than I do
What did she mean by this?

this is a serious question

>>17416895
No, i can function but my life would be much better if i lied more.
I hate lying, role playing, acting, anything that is not true; i don't know why but it is what it is.

I don't lie everyday, only when it's something that would really fuck me up.

But dating is when people lie more, specially when they want sex; that's why, i think, so many relationships fail, because when you are comfortable with the other person you begin to show who you really are and see who the other person is and you realize you don't like the other person or even hate the other person.

>>17416937
And you really don't think that problem would be rectified by being yourself from the beginning? How does that make lying not an issue/make it easier or better? You're precisely saying lying is what ruins people's relationships, not telling the truth lol. Its the other way around m8, if you were honest from the start you'd never have that issue to begin with.
Idk man, I disagree with you fundamentally. Lying only puts you in a shit spot, you gotta put out so much more effort when you lie when there's an easier way yo.

>>17416936
That you have a better butt and flater stomach than her. What the fuck else does it sound like?

>>17416913
> I stroked her hair and rubbed her shoulder
I'm surprised she didn't pounce you man.

>>17416965
I'm sure things would have gone that way if there weren't another person in the room and the fact that we didn't have much time, but fuck if I don't regret that I didn't just throw caution to the wind at that moment. I could have, but I didn't want to overdo it so I kept (too) composed.

But I take comfort in the likelihood that if she was into it then, a few weeks apart won't change it. But I intend to act fast.

>>17416947
That's what i'm saying, i lost way more by being myself than pretending to be something else but hindsight is 20/20 so it doesn't matter.
So i wouldn't feel cringy when doing it and i would do it more.

Yeah, but it gets them one. I said it to ilustrate how common it is, people do it even on a situation where they should know each other because truth would bring rejection.

It's my experience, when i look back and see the things i lost or could've gained. More work, more rewards.

Saying this makes it look like it is a big deal for me and i never thought of it this way but i'm thinking it is, actually.

Girls:
If you're interested in someone but you're the one to always initiate a conversation via text or chat is that a clear sign that she's not interested in me? Should I stop?

How do I concentrate on studying. Currently in library right now but I can't seem to concentrate at all? I used to be an extraordinarily good student in my undergrad. But right now I can't even mug up two definitions. I keep staring at the book and my mind keeps drifting off. Anyone in a similar position

>>17416436
For me it completely depends. If it's purely sexual I think as long as the guy's out of his formative years more or less, it's fine. Say 25 and up fucking someone as old as 55 wouldn't really strike me as creepy... although it also depends on how hard the woman pursued him, who had the initiative.

For a relationship it's different. For that, what you suggested is absolutely creepy and too big a gap for me. If the guy is late twenties I think thirty five is fine. As for finding the woman creepy - if she usually dates men of varying ages and ends up with someone seven years younger (but not -that- young), fine. If she always has very young guys as boyfriends? That's off. It implies that she either picks her preferred aesthetic (boyish and youthful) over life experience and maturity, or that in fact the lack of experience is part of what draws her in. The first would just be off putting to me, the second creepy.

>>17416536
Just throwing it out there, but it is possible to be allergic to semen.

>>17416559
Because women have more to lose and less to gain when having casual sex.

For a guy, even if it's bad sex you have at least had an additional sex partner. Which means some extra experience, an extra story to tell friends (especially if it was hilariously bad), the ego stroke of having gotten a random woman to let you fuck her.
For a woman, if the sex was bad you upped your number for nothing. Yes, women slutshame more actively than men, but they would not do that if men didn't care at all. It is a female system of competition and shaming, but it is built around the knowledge that at the end of the day, men care. (Even if they don't care AS much.) Just like guys are way more obsessed with penis length among one another than women (who can't even judge that shit), but if women universally stopped giving any fucks tomorrow, that would soon collapse. If you ask random guys whether they wants their dream girl to come with a bodycount of five men or ten men, it'll be a rare man who picks ten and women know this. So then on top of having had bad sex, they have made their past just a bit more colorful.

And to add to that, one night stands typically are not satisfying sexual experiences for women. The man already put in all the work to get her in bed, it is not the norm to then go down on the girl or even dwell on foreplay. The typical experience is some groping, the woman goes down on the man, he jackhammers her until he climaxes, then rolls over and falls asleep.

So it is in women's benefit to try to pick quality over quantity.

>>17416789
Nope, take the leap.

>>17416936
She meant it as a compliment, a dig at her body/display of insecurity, or most likely: a mix of both.

>>17417098
Even if she is interested, if this has gone on for some time it's not worth it to me. What are you trying to achieve, get into a relationship with her that feels one-sided?

>>17417102
My issuses are more with procrastination than being able to concentrate, but based on what you say I would find a way to study that forces you to focus. Making summaries for example, or studying alone and making a recap every so often out loud like you are explaining the material to someone else. Also just something like using a marker to highlight important parts makes it easier to stick to the task at hand because you are more actively involved.

>>17417150
>relationship that feels one-sided

Obviously not, maybe she's just being polite when she answers but I thought that if a female didn't like you they'll let you know immediately. I also thought that females usually take long to answer back. She's probably not interested.

>>17417158
Don't get me wrong, I don't think it's either one or the other, but it does happen that people get together and one partner still behaves very passively. If she was sincerely into you it wouldn't always need to start with you - at least in by far most cases, pathological shyness is always an option, but it will be a minority issue if after having plenty of conversations she's still not confident enough to hit you up first. And she'd need to be in too deep to realize how uninterested that comes across as well.

Women don't have one universal code for how they deal with guys. She might not realize that you're romantically interested. She might realize it and like the attention. She might realize it and feel too awkward to address it first.
Try to focus more on how you feel about their behavior than whatever goes on in their head. That's their responsibility, how they act towards you is what they give you to work with.

And no, again, it's an individual matter. What would be a sign is if she'd take a long time to answer most people, but not with you. But without any frame of reference, her responding quickly could mean that she's glued to her phone all the time as well as it could mean that she enjoys your conversations a lot.

Femanon here, a question for all guys here
I have this one friend i have romantic feelings for. However our friends often joke about us being a pair and he gets upset everytime(he kinda tends to be immature, but thats not the point). Am i getting friendzoned here?

>>17417165
Thank you for responding. I occasionally throw in some hints that I like her and then pretend that I didn't mean it that way and she always responds with "Mmhmm" so I don't know what that means. She told me that no one texts her and I find that hard to believe because she occasionally goes out to bars and whatnot with her friends. She also told me that even though she's outgoing, in reality shes an introvert and a hermit and that she would rather be at home with her cats. I also find that hard to believe because she's currently traveling around Europe. There are times where she responds quickly but I think she's just being nice. I know the best answer is, "just tell her" but I feel like it's going to ruin our friendship. I just don't want it to seem like I'm only interested in sex or what because I genuine like her as a person, but I'm kind of scared because she told me that she knew a lot of guys who were only interested in sex.

>>17417177
that or he's annoyed that they're bringing it up because he has feelings for you

How do I initiate sex? I know she wants it and I'm bored of the jokes and hints.

Should I be straight forward or is it better to have fun with the situation?

>>17417186
Or he is simply annoyed.

>>17417177
hes probably embarrassed because he does want you. but now you should ask yourself, are you still attracted to a man that is ashamed of his feelings, or that is too sheepish to act on them?

>>17417204
Da fug

Girl question,
If a very close girl friend of yours bought you a sex toy, since you had been complaining about not having had any decent sex in a while and whatnot, how'd you react? Weirded out, shocked, grateful? What would be appropriate?

>>17417177
He might be tired of the jokes. Talk to him about it.

My friends were lightly joking about me and my crush being a pair. Then they began doing it in front of her and yelling sexual jokes over me every time I began to talk.

occasionally she would join in with them and made it worse for when she's not around. I don't know how to act on these situations so I look like a tongue tied child doing his best.

The first few days were fine and I kinda felt like I deserved it because I'm a shy PoS but months of the shit is tiring and annoying and I fucking hate being rudely interrupted over a joke about my dick. I'm never rude or annoying to those stupid fucking faggots.

>>17417221
She's tired of you bitching

find someone to fuck or take the hint and do it yourself.

I almost bought my m8 a flashlight because he bickered for a year EVERY DAMN DAY about not having a girlfriend to fuck.

>>17417239
Actually the other way around, I have a friend complaining and I feel like helping her out but without being a total weirdo about it.

>>17417186
Can i possibly tell which one is the actual reason? Is there a difference?
>>17417204
Yeah, he's quite emotionally withdawn but i don't really mind it.
>>17417237
Will try to ask him then

>>17417221
I'd probably laugh at the gift, and end up using it at some point anyway.

>>17417244
>I'd probably laugh at the gift, and end up using it at some point anyway.
Well that's pretty much all I'm hoping for, I don't expect her to hug me half to death out of gratitude, as long as she gives it a try and finds some fun in it.

>>17417248
I mean this might be unappropriate if she's a virgin. But aside from this, if she has some sense of humor and is an easygoing person, you should be okay.

>>17417252
She's not, she's not super experienced but she had a (rather shitty) boyfriend for a couple of months until recently, who was an all-around ass unfortunately, and sexually demanding without ever being giving from what I've heard, which is the reason why I wanted to help her to some enjoyment, without giving off any weird vibes.
We're pretty close friends since forever and she's easy going I'd say.

Are there women out there who want to move to a backwater rural area? How do you find them?

How tight are vaginas really? Tighter than my grip?

>>17417259
Much looser. Especially when you factor in that they are very slippery. It's a very different feeling to jacking off.

>>17417267
So when people say a vagina was tight, it is still not as tight as fapping? What would be the point of sex if my hand feels better?

>>17417269
It's almost like sex isn't all about benis in vagoo, anon
But you're right, that's what it is nowadays

How do you tell if a bartender is into your or if she's just doing it for the tips? Shit's weirding me out.

>>17417259
Depends on the girl too but vaginas are slippery and very stretchy - babies go through there. Won't be as tight as your hand.

>>17417290
She's doing it for the tips.

>>17417302
Bummer.

>>17417290
The answer is probably neither. It's probably a fun and nice girl who isn't doing it for the tip and isn't into you either. The people who manage to stay nice, from my experience, aren't doing it for any such benefit.

>>17417310
She laughs at the awkward shit I say, and says awkward shit herself, she keeps randomly touching my arm or brushing unto me when she walks by... Were being nice to clients not a part of her job description it'd be a pretty clear case, but now it's just confusing.

>>17417290

maybe she';s just a nice person in general.

There are such people.

>>17417330
>touching
Okay, she might be a little bit interested

>>17417330
Girls do this shit. The answer is still probably neither. We have this girl at work who does this same thing just because she likes the attention. You'll need something more to go on.

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Girls, have you been in a similar situation?

Quick backstory: my hair is a bit longer than shoulder length, always up in a bun atm because everything is weird with gross ends, with a dull dark brown color. basically gave it some resting time over the summer.

Showed my best friend pic related, told her I considered getting my hair done like that. Her response was "hmmmmmm I like you exactly the way you are now"

This confused the shit out of me, because we've known each other for almost 10 years, and usually encourage one another to do what we want.

And no, I don't need her approval to do what I want, but it's always nice when your friends agree. I guess I'm just confused about why she would want me to keep this current disaster on my head.

What should I think of a girl who is receptive and flirty in real life but passive and lukewarm over text?

She was never much for that sort of thing, and after getting closer to her that didn't really change, so maybe it means nothing and that's just not a method of communication she cares much about.

How do yall deal with romantic loneliness?

At this point, dating sites are no go's with all the bots that are getting to me. Plus, I doubt I'd find people as kinky as I am.

>>17417290
Guy here I had this situation happen to me.
I asked for her number and got it.
We texted a bit and she seemed nice and enthusiastic but we never went out because she stopped responding.
A short time after that I noticed she got a new BF.

I don't know if my experience helps at all but I thought it would help knowing I got the number and she seemed genuine for a bit.

>>17417098
idk, the fact she responds at all is usually the green light man. She might not be sure you're interested and is afraid to initiate. Won't hurt to make a move though.
>>17417102
If your working out of a book, I find that if I either do not even bring any electronics or at least keep them off and out of reach I work better. Internet is my biggest distraction.
Take it in smaller chunks, after every paragraph rewrite what you read in your own words, thats how I keep myself in it and stop my mind from drifting frequently. Sometimes if it's bad enough, I have to do it sentence by sentence rather than by paragraph. Other times I can do it by page if it's not that bad too.
I have the same issue about the drifting away, but I also have ADD, so my lack of attention span is a little different from the usual. But I also find if I absolutely have the luxury to do so, if I give studying a go and I just ain't havin it I just give it up for a few hours and try again later. There are some times I just cannot focus no matter what I do at that given point in time, so I fuck off and do something else for a bit, and when I come back to it I'm actually able to get something done. But sometimes I just gotta power through it because I'm on a deadline you know?
Regardless, take frequent short breaks, like 5 minutes every 30, or just when you start to feel worn down.

>>17417221
>>17417242
Could go either way, she could take it the way >>17417239 did, and think you're being a shit about it and this is a crude way of telling her you're sick of hearing about it,
Or she could think it's funny, and possibly helpful.
My friends bought me a vibrator for my 21st as a gag gift, but jokes on them because I use it all the time lol.
>>17417259
Every vag is different. Mine is practically (or possibly literally) impenetrable.
>>17417290
I'd be willing to bet money on tips. Think about it, she probably gets 50 drunk fucks a night trying to hit on her.
>>17417444
I think you answered your own question there.
>>17417472
I find 99.9% of the time after I masturbate suddenly I feel a billion times better.

>>17417506
I masturbate usually 5 times a day..starting to feel bad.

>>17417436

There's no accounting for taste. If you have it in a bun all the time, maybe she hasn't seen how bad it supposedly is. Or is just so used to looking at you that she doesn't see it.
Or she thinks that's a bad choice and doesn't know how to say so. Or she's going to steal it for herself and doesn't want you to be stuck looking the same.
Or she's deep in lesbians with you and loves you unconditionally.

Girls. Just how creepy is it to creep on the Facebook profile of a girl that you are interested in?

>>17417568
>when girls do it = normal
>when guys do it = restraining order

Should I shave my shaft? I don't mind girls not going down on me.

How to mentally withdrawn guys behave around the girls they like? I feel like i'm misreading everything he does and i can't really tell if i have green light here.

>>17417916
How do you know they like the girl if you're having trouble reading him

>>17417920
I am the girl and i am interested in him but i have no idea if i should go for it or no because in terms of emotions he's horribly confusing.

Girls and guys

I hate this shit. I hate how friendships and relationships just die for no reason. How nothing could go wrong, but just as humans. People lose interest in each other and forget about the others. Even if you had been really close friends.

It really hurts to be honest. Nothing wrong happened. This girl was so sweet to me, and told me some very kind and caring things, and now she doesn't hardly talk to any more just a month later... It really hurts

>>17417929
This freaks me out. The girl I intend to ask out properly is out of the country for a month. I'm afraid the closeness we developed will dissolve somehow. There was a previous shorter gap and things only improved after that one, so I hope she stays consistent.

>>17417925
Give us an example

>>17417968

I was very close to this girl. We've been friends for a while. And I've always been there when she's needed help and support. Always, well all of a sudden we she slowly stopped talking to me. Nothing bad happened between us at all. But just, our talks have been fading. I don't know why, I really don't understand. And it's really hard for me, because I'm not doing well these days, and she's not here to support me. I don't know why. It's really depressing when someone who you've developed closeness and trust with doesn't talk to you much anymore.

:(

>>17417925
are you attractive? how long have you known him?

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>>17417986
>It's really depressing when someone who you've developed closeness and trust with doesn't talk to you much anymore.
Iktfb

The whole indiference is the opposite of love thing is a painful truth

Gf said it felt like she had to pee when we fucked last night, in missionary and doggy. She went and tried to pee but didnt have to. I was either hitting her bladder (dont think so cause both positions and havent had this before). And shes never had a penetration orgasm and most girls say it feels like the urge to pee before hand? Any insight on this?

Is it normal that I've been missing my ex lately, after almost 3 months. We broke up end of May, and the first few days were very tough, well maybe not the first one because I got proper drunk so the hangover kinda blocked a day. Then a week or two like usual after a breakup then almost nothing. But now this past week she was in my dreams twice, and worse of all I thought about her when I got drunk on a festival while trying to hook up with a girl and basically sabotaged myself. Any other guys end up missing their ex after a few months? Pretty dumb question I know.

>>17417998
You just made me realize how close the bladder is close to the vagina

>>17418026
yeah its right there

>>17417996
>The whole indiference is the opposite of love thing is a painful truth

What does this mean?

Should I take physical closeness and willingness to touch form a girl, relative to how she acts with other men, a positive sign, and should I stop analyzing this and just trust my instinct instead of overthinking things like a faggot?

>>17417983
What kind of example?
>>17417994
I know him for three years. I think i'm like 6/10.

>>17418045
>What kind of example?
How does he act that makes you confused?

This is going to sound mean, but I'm not getting any answers in the qtddtot thread. Guys: How can I adjust my body language or whatever signals I give out so that men leave me alone? Are there any signs you look for to decide if a woman is single and/or receptive?

>>17417269
Prolactin

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/16095799/

>>17418055
When there's a conversation, and i somehow become the topic he gets kinda agressive. He often gets upset over my behavior, though he often doesn't mind the same kbehavior from others. I have no idea whether it means he likes me, or wants me to gtfo. I doubt it's the other one because i'm quite close to him, but this might as well be the reason, so....

>>17418034
>The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference.
Google it because youtube can explain it better than me.
>>17418028
This elevates piss fetish to a whole new level.
>>17418062
The way you wrote there made more sense.

>>17418070
Sorry, I was trying to be more direct and simple in my question. Any advice on getting men to leave me alone without hurting their feelings, though?

>>17418065
>they invited people to fuck or masturbate in their labs
Fucking science.

>>17418078
The only thing i can think of is the way you looked at them changed but that's a weak hypothesis.

>>17418069
Yeah that is confusing. Obviously he cares for you, though whether this is as a friend or a romantic partner I really can't say without seeing more.
Just go for it, guys do it all the time.

>>17418089
Yeah, I'm a little socially stupid, so I try to avoid looking at people unless I have to.

>>17418104
Another hypothesis is that you were oblivious to them before.

>>17418108
Possible. Is there a way to get them to stop?

>>17418101
I can try to give you more examples if you tell me more precisely what info do you need to tell more accurately.

>>17418125
How often does he look at you, do you ever catch his eye

>>17418117
People are shit at dealing with rejection but straight up saying you're not interested is the best option.
Never had to deal with this so i might be wrong.

>>17418134
It feels more like he's doing his best to ignore me. You can tell when someone's doing this intentionally.
Though it happens we catch an eye, but he just seems to ignore it.

>>17418162
Maybe he's trying to hide his feelings by going to the other end of the spectrum.
Signs point to yes he might like you, but on the other hand he might not be faking.

When do people usually have the 'Define the Relationship' talk?

>>17418194
If he's not faking asking him out would be awkward as fuck. Though there is no way i can tell whether he's faking or not, huh?

>>17418062

I'm a girl, but I find when I carry myself in a more masculine way, make eye-contact impossible, and overall act much less engaged in my surroundings (eg using peripheral vision rather than turning my head to look at things, staying focused on getting where I need to go like no one can slow me down, etc) I get way less attention.

Can't help you much though as far as direct social situations, where you kinda have to either engage or just be a rude fuck.

Are girls people?

>>17417177
I had this happen with a coworker once. At a company party some douchebag kept joking about us being a couple and it bugged its both.

Wouldn't bother me now, but back then it did. We never became a couple.

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>>17418394
No, we're actually Reptilians trying to take over the the human race
But I'm defecting from the homeworld, so I'm willing to come clean about this fact. Take this news to your people human male, I fear my kind will come to end me soon.

>>17418062

Have your hair tied back tightly. As tight as possible.
Never smile.
Wear too much mascara.
No lipstick.
Don't make eye contact.
Keep your head high to sow that you're not shy.

Each of these all add +1 to the Bitchface stat, the stat that deters men from ever going anywhere near you.
In fact, they may actually cross the street just to avoid looking like they are following you, if you walk in front of them.

The alternative is to look up "this is what a feminist looks like" and dye your hair and eat until you are feminist sized.

>>17418430
You look like the average metal baby

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>>17418062

>>17418436
Some women have the bitch face maxed out, too. they're the ones you see in customer service that look easy to complain to the manager at the drop of a hat. Some women let the bitch face affect their whole, lousy,bitchy personality.

Can't wait to find a new job.

>>17418436
Wait, are you serious? Besides the mascara thing, you just described me, and I've had a hard time getting people to talk to me.

>>17418457

I feel for you bro.

As bad as my job is (and it truly is awful), customer service would probably drive me to suicide.

I get what you mean about maxed out bitchface though. Some women really have perfected it.

Honestly, I'm impressed they've made themselves so unnapproachable without reaching feminist levels of "nope, not bothering that thing".
Perfecting the "bitch-face" is kind of a work of art.

Guys:
I'm sending a rose to my boyfriend today.
How would the men of /adv/ feel if they got a flower from their S.O, even though its not typically a guy thing?

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Girlfriend is moving to New Zealand for work to advance her career. We've only been together for two months.

She's leaving in January shortly after new years. My problem is that I love her and while I want her to go and follow her dreams I can't stand the thought of losing her.

Come January is it over, or do you think we could make it work?

>>17418487

I think it is charming and romantic, I would welcome such a gift from my girlfriend.

>>17418470
Serious.

Honestly, the mascara thing is one of the worst ones. Loads of muscles around the eyes, and looking at the eyes makes up for 90% of non-verbal communication.
You go around covering them up, and you make yourself harder to read.

Hair tight back - makes you look uptight.
Never smile - look hostile.
Lipstick is generally an indicator that you want someone to look at your lips, and people associate lips with kissing, so not wearing lipstick = you not trying to attract anyone.
Lack of eye contact = she's not interested or she's shy.
Lack of eye contact, but keeps her head up = not shy - so not interested.

There's alot of really cool little psychological tricks there warning men not to go near you.

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>>17418436
>The alternative is to look up "this is what a feminist looks like" and dye your hair and eat until you are feminist sized.
Laughing because it's true.

>>17418470
Really bad: mascara and never smiling
Bad: no eye contact
Don't care: the rest
>>17418487
Weird but cool? Idk

>>17418487
I guess it depends on the person. If you are the kind of person who just naturally does thoughtful things and gets gifts it would be nice. If you only get gifts as an apology, it would seem suspicious.

I doubt you fall into the second category, and you are probably overvaluing its significance.

>>17418491

Anyone?

>>17418491
Sounds like a Shakespearian tragedy you have on your hands

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>>17418430

>>17418491
Don't worry, bro. I'll take care of her

>>17418494
I had no idea. Anon, thank you so much. This might actually be the thing that has been standing in my way the whole time.

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>>17418535
Fight me home world I am ready.

>>17418494
>>17418436
>tfw can't wear mascara and smile reflexively out of nervousness

I can walk with my head held high, at least. I already usually wear my hair back in a ponytail, I can tighten it. Thanks.

>>17418365
Also thanks for this.

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>>17418524
>>17418536

Is it wrong if I ask her to remain in a relationship with me when the time comes? I'd only be able to visit her probably once every 3-4 months and she'll be there for 2-3 years.

The way I see it I either propose to her or allow the relationship to end. I feel like she would deny a proposal. But I have to do something lads, I've never felt such a way about a girl.

>>17418494
>>17418501

Different anon, but the mascara thing comes as a complete surprise to me. All the hot and mingley girls I know wear shit tons, it's just the fashion I guess. Never in a million years would have considered it could be an unapproachable trait in the right context, but it makes sense when you point it out.

>>17418024
I felt a lot better after 6 months and ready to begin my life anew at a year out.

>>17417998
Whenever I masturbate or have sex, the relaxedness makes me think I have to pee. I always make a point to go to the bathroom before either of these, so that I can tell myself "It's just the arousal, don't hold back"
And I masturbate clitorially. It's not from hitting the bladder. It's an arousal thing. She's normal.

>>17417929
You're almost there! The stage before this one is the desperate "what did I do???" bullshit.
You need some serenity to accept the things you cannot change.

Protip: If your social net is so devastated by losing one person, you need to fortify the people around you. Get more friends. It is very stressful for the others if you are relying on them completely. It is really uncomfortable to be someone's only friend.

>>17417916
Just ask him out.

>>17417568
I expect it. I don't have anything on my profile that I wouldn't want anyone to see. I'm friends with bosses, exbosses, and my father's pastor, for fuck's sake.

>>17417657
It is considered a treat if a man trims his pubic hair. I generally don't expect men to do anything that I don't specifically ask for.
I like trimmed or shaved, personally. Trimmed is the best balance between the hairy/shaved preferences. Make it short enough that it can't make a full U curl.
Those curls gets stuck in our teeth, son.

>>17417472
I go on /soc/ and omegle and fantasize about actually meeting any of these fuckers.

>>17417436
Maybe she isn't a fan of balayage. Btw, I don't care what google told you, that is NOT an ombre. That's a balayage.
You are overthinking the fuck out of this. Don't taint your guys' relationship like this. If you didn't want her opinion, why did you ask for one?

>>17418555

If you don't ask, you're sort of making the decision for her. There's not much at risk by asking, worst case scenario she says no and you never have to face her again.

>>17417221
I've had a friend buy me a dildo before. It wasn't weird, and I use it like any other toy. She's probably just trying to give you a way to relieve your sexual frustration. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth, anon.

>>17417290
I'll tell you that I don't recommend basing it off of how she treats other patrons. After working in customer service, I always got favorites that I would treat more warmly than others. I'd often blatantly flirt with them. The girls and I would discuss how awesome our favorites are and giggle about the handsome guys.
That's not to say that I would date any of them.
They are just the not-assholes who make my day nicer.

>>17417259
Vaginas are a muscle. Put your finger in your mouth. Lightly put your lips around your finger. Now tense your lips up like you just had something sour.
That's not too different from the kegel muscles. Though an oversimplification.
But you can't say it's tight/loose, since it differs.

>>17417221
Is this a girl giving me, a girl, a sex toy?
One, I would be ecstatic, because I hate spending money on sex toys.
Two, I would wonder if she was hitting on me, since I am openly bi. If you are blatantly straight, I wouldn't worry about this point.
Some girls are very private about their sexuality towards their friends. I'm the type who likes to take friends to my favorite sex shop and show them all my favorite vibrators.
YMMV

>>17417102
I use adderall! :) Google the symptoms of ADD and tell your doctor that you have them!
Be sure not to put 5/5 severity on each question for the questionnaire they give you, or they'll think you're a drug seeker. Which you are, in this situation! But be sneakier about it.
Be sure to talk about how it gets in the way of things like work and school, but particularly on focusing on personal hygiene and getting to bed on time! Make a case for how ADD is a detriment to your life.
Start on lower doses. Don't ask for high ones. Pretend you've never tried it before.

>>17416789
I reconnected with a guy who I had a crush on in highschool. We sat down and watched a movie together. He put his hand on my thigh, rubbing lazy circles with this thumb. He crept his hand up higher, and I leaned into his touch. We made eye contact and saw each other breathing heavily. I put my hand on his thigh and bit my lip. Next thing I know, we're fucking! :D
You can do it, Anon!

>>17416772
I kinda suggest not making that sentence by putting an arm around her. Put an arm around her, yes, but do that earlier in the day.
Even when I'm expecting a guy telling me he likes me, when he does, my intsta reaction is always panic. I would feel like a trapped animal if he did it with his arm around me. Even though I'm a touchy feely person.
But I also have mental problems, so maybe getting nice and cozy would be best for your girl.

>>17416697
What the fuck, why are you still hanging around your ex fiance? You jumped into things too young with her. She has an age gap fetish, yeah, but she shouldn't take it out on you.
But you also should learn to move on, because the more time you spend with her, the less able you are able to disconnect yourself from that chapter of your life.

>>17416634
Ten years? Fifteen? Depends on how he feels about it. If he acts like it's no big deal, I won't think it is.

>>17416559
Because we need an escape route. If we realize at some point during the night that you're a crazy lunatic who we shouldn't let you get into position to murderrape us, we need the opportunity to say, "WELL THANKS FOR THE COFFEE, BUT I GOTTA GO"
Even with guys that I have been actively sexual with, I don't agree to any sexing until I know that I'm actually in the right mind to have sex. Sometimes my Mental Problems(tm) act up, and I get freaky and don't want to have sex. I don't want to run into that after agreeing to sex six hours prior, and then have to deal with a disappointed horny guy.

>>17416436
I'm 21, so I can't exactly speak for what I'll be okay with when I'm older. I wouldn't want to go younger than 19, MAAAYBE 18 if he looks and acts mature. I have an age gap and D/s fetish, so that plays along with this preference.

>>17416334
Did you make out in public? Where are you meeting her?
I'm always into the hug greeting. You can make it particularly warm, close, and long if you want. I don't like kiss greetings.

>>17416173
Tell your mother that you want a little space from the chick. YMMV depending on how fucking crazy your ma is.

>>17416136
Ya

>>17418487
I'd appreciate candy or like a note or something more 2bh

Flower is fine but idk it's kind of weird too

>>17418491
>Known each other for two months
>It's troo love
Sorry m8
Long distance fucking sucks. Let her go.

>>17418202
When the relationship needs defining, sempai.

It's usually when one party wants to clarify the level of commitment expected: to make the couple exclusive or to ensure it's just a fuckbuddies relationship.

>>17418572
>for the questionnaire they give you
Lol they make you fill out a questionnaire normally? I was kind of a weird case, my doc was telling me for years I had ADD, since I was 10, but I was a stubborn brat and felt like ADD made me "retarded" so I didnt want to admit to it and kept refusing her.
Finally when I was 16 I was complaining to a friend about my lack of focus for finals and she asked if I wanted one of her little bro's adderall she often swiped kek. Tried it for the lulz and because I was desperate and realized how I actually felt like a normal human being for the first time in my life, and not the jittery high like all my friends were describing. Then I went back to my doctor and told her I was willing to try ADD meds to see if they'll help my schooling, even though I knew they already would lmao. She just gave it to me no questions asked.
Shit changed my life though man. It even fixed my depression because before I couldn't focus on anything for longer than 30 seconds and just felt like a drone going through the days without ever being productive. Shit's been so liberating to actually be able to function in life. Within a month I went from a D student to a B student. Now I'm mostly A's with the occasional B.

>>17418597
My doc already agreed before the questionnaire. We were discussing it, and she kind of offhandedly said, "Do you want to take the questionnaire?" I said it sounded fun. There were a couple I didn't relate to (I have inattentive subtype, not hyperactive) and we blatantly discussed how putting a maximum on all of them would look like drug seeking.
Plus it's good to get written "proof" on your record.

What do women think about neoclassical architecture?

What do women think about the Ford Focus?

What do women think about cold smoking?

>>17418615
hmm interesting. I'm actually a little concerned, because I plan to work overseas after graduation and the place I'd be going to doesn't really recognize ADD as a real thing, and basically all meds for it are highly illegal there. I'd have to go off my meds if I got the job, like I said I've been on them for 5 years now I've almost forgotten how shitty it was before. I kind of hope that maybe with age I've gotten a little better, but I was always concerned that if I went off it for this job, but decided I couldn't handle it and had to quit and come home how willing a doctor would be to put me back on it after I quit on my own accord at my own request you know?
If I'd look like I was drug seeking or only taking it when it's convenient for me. I mean I'd really like to see if I can manage my life without it, relying on a drug like that for my whole life does sound kinda pathetic to me still, but if I'm really not up to snuff without it I'd rather get back on it than be a zombie again.

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38KB, 500x375px

>>17418635
>neoclassical
>not mudéjar

What do women think about the reconquista?

Has anyone ever moved far away for love? Or, just in general.

For me, I was moving away anyways but I ended up meeting a girl from the place I was going to on a dating site and things kind of hit off between us. This just increases my desire to move to said place, but, it's a huge decision and I'll be starting a new life and leaving my family and friends behind. I honestly do not want to live in the city I currently do forever though.

Am I wrong to feel guilty for wanting to escape from this? I feel really dragged down here but I also feel bad for leaving because my mother opposes it greatly.

>>17418641
5 years? Damn, what kind of dosage are you on? XR or IR?
I'm on IR and I have to cycle it with periods of not taking it, or else my tolerance gets to the point where it's mostly useless.
I don't really do that part with the guidance of a doctor, though. I see my doctor fairly infrequently. I've been taking this on and off for 3 years now, I'd say.

Your excuse seems fine for coming back to the states. All you need to do is talk about how horrible it was to be off of it, and that it was only because it was illegal. You're appealing to humanity, really. It's all about the connection you have with your doctor.

Girls
I have 4 highschool friends(all girls), once at a party 3 of them and some other friends were pressuring me to pick up some chick (i fucking suck at it) i was drunk and eventually made out with one of my friends
The thing is, my pickup line was "yo everyone is being a pain in the ass telling me to get some girl, are you in for it?"
And a couple months after i found out that she got offended, how do i fix this? Should i just ignore or should i, in another party, say that im sorry and even try something with her again?

>>17418683
Since you were drunk, you could probably say, "Jeez, I was so drunk. I'm kind of embarrassed. Did I say anything assholish?"

if I can't make friends or be involved with anyone romantically, how do I keep from feeling lonely?

>>17418688
I was thinking about " since that day i feel bad for being a douche, can you forgive me, we could try again, but this time ill admit that because you are hot and it was good"

Is this autistic?

>>17418704
>can you forgive me
No motherfucker no

>>17418683

Wait, she was offended but made out with you anyway?
Fuck her, the right to be butthurt has expired.

>>17418682
Its not that high I think, 20mg XR. I only upped the dose once, they started me at 15 but I was only at that level for maybe 6 months. I felt better, but not like it was doing that much of a difference so they increased it to 20 and I've been pretty stable on it ever since. There are some days I feel like I could use more (on one occasion I popped my usual 20 and then took one of the left over 15's I had from years back to get through a particularly tough paper) but for the most part I think I'm good where I'm at.
I was actually really bad about remembering to take it in high school, to the point my doctor scolded me. I used to not want to take it on weekends, but now I just take it steadily every day.
True, I mean I figure I'd probably have to have a real dick doctor to not put me back. I was just prescribed it by my pediatrician, but when I switched over to an adult doctor when I turned 20 she never even really questioned me about it. She just continued to fill the scripts. I assume its probably because there was some note of some sort in my medical records about my experience with it. But idk, if I go overseas and then come back to a whole new doctor idk how they'll react.

I'm also a tad concerned about the process of going off it. I don't think I'll finish college without it, so I'd like to stay with it up till graduation, but like, the timeline for this job is as so.
Application in the november before I graduate, so November of 2017, I get told if I'm even accepted or not in May of 2018 which is also when I graduate, and then I'll be shipped out in July of 2018 I think. So I have that window between May and July to get off it. idk if that's enough time or how long this sort of thing usually takes. I've never come off a medication I'd been taking long term like this.

Is it better to settle or be alone?

>>17418728
>come back to a whole new doctor idk how they'll react.
Well be sure to get your medical records forwarded.

>I'm also a tad concerned about the process of going off it.
Do it with the help of your doctor! Tell them what's going on and they can figure out the best way to help you. Maybe they even know of some prescriptions that'll take the edge of, but are legal in that country. Or figure out a way for you to get it in the first place.

Don't do this alone!

>>17418732
Only you can answer that m8.
Me personally, I'd rather "settle" I guess. Though my feelings would phrase it more as compromising than settling. Nobody's perfect you know, you're never going to find the absolute perfect match you'll never have any hardship with whatsoever. They're going to have some sort of trait you don't like, they're going to get on your nerves at some point, and they're going to have the exact same experience with you as well. The question being are their good traits enough to compensate for the bad. I think a lot of people confuse "settling" with "compromising". Settling is when you stay miserable with someone with traits you absolutely cannot get around.
With this many people on the planet, I actually think it'd be a lot harder to ever feel the need to "settle". Usually means your standards are sky high, that you actually won't stand for anything less than perfection, in which case I'd say it's better to be alone since you'll never be happy with anyone anyways. Most people can sit back and categorize things from their "ideal mate" and check off what is absolutely mandatory, and what can be overlooked in favor of X trait. For example, it is absolutely mandatory that they guy I'm with doesn't smoke. I will not budge on that one, I'd rather be alone than with a smoker. Now, while I prefer a guy who's an indoorsy type, that likes to stay in rather than go out, I can date a busybody if they have the proper positive traits for me to compensate. You feel me?

On the scale of touch flirting, if I've hit the point of shoulder rubs and hair touching, what is the next step? Do I have license to go for a kiss?

>>17418766
Would you call that cuddling?
I've always felt cuddling leads to the kiss.

Okay, I know for sure this girl likes me(I know for sure because of being in person with her and our mutual friend telling me) but every time I text or snapchat her and I drop flirty stuff there and there she seems kind of cold to it. I don't know why.

>>17418722
I dont know lighter words in english
Im not American but you get he idea

>>17418732
Varies from person to person

In my case, I'm someone that's never satisfied with what they got so for me, it's better to be alone since it would be unfair to the other person

>>17418766
face touch first

>>17418780
Maybe, but not quite. Probably depends more on what the mood seems to be like than whatever particular categorization of intensity a specific act of affection might be considered, anyway.

Girl here. Friend of mine me how she plays tennis and how she has to find people to play tennis with her online as very few of her friends like tennis. The tennis players she met online are male. Is she doing this to try to meet guys?
A while ago, I was in a group activity with people who I didn't know beforehand. This guy (I overheard that he's single) plays tennis professionally. I mentioned him go my friend (without mentioning his relationship status) and she said she is fine with me introducing her to him. When I asked him if he wants to play tennis with my friend, he asked if my friend is male or female. Does he think that I am introducing him to a girl for dating?

>>17418882
He probably doesn't want to waste time playing against some limp wrist girl that can barely volley

For women:

I'm not really too curious, but the thought just came to mind. What do you think of men that wear the same ~2-2.5 sets of clothes, always? Or wear the thing for a long period of time, then switch to something else, and repeat. Any small change becoming the default.

>>17419001
Don't really care, but if we were dating, I'd get you to buy new clothes.

How do you not get bored, btw?

>>17419015
Never really thought about it. I just don't.

Any clothing I wear is comfortable and or serves the functions I want it to. It doesn't connect to much of anything else, and repetition (consistency) doesn't otherwise bore me.

If I tell my friends/acquaitances that I attend meetup.com events, will they think that I am attending them to meet guys? My uni doesn't organize any language exchange activities for the language I am interested in

>>17416047
this if for both genders but I'm a [spoiler]guy[/spoiler] so if there's a big age-gap does it turn off your ability to spend time together with your partner when you get odd stares & the occasional scoff

how do you deal with other people's impression when the gap is something like 29-46 or say even 25-37

should a coffee shop or bar be the go-to location for talking?

>>17419044
I probably wouldn't date someone with a large age gap in the first place.

Girls, if you knew a guy who was attractive in almost every other way, (physically, good personality) but had a few fucked up teeth, would you still date him? I dont mean super fucked up but like one or two teeth out of place.

>>17419044
Boyfriend is 11 years older than me. He also looks older, I look younger.
I guess 60% of the time people assume I'm his daughter.
I just don't give a fuck. I am happy with him. Everything else isn't all that important. I let people watch and do my thing.

>>17419089
>attractive in almost every other way
That's a big claim to make

>>17419089
It's hypothetical if anything.I'm just looking for opinions on the matter. Teeth, or dental hygiene in general is a very touchy subject for most people I suppose.

>>17419089
Not female, but no one can answer this question. There's a lot of ways for teeth to be out of place, and they might give even people who would broadly answer that they don't care about teeth, subconscious pause.

I've had bruxism and tapped and ground my teeth together all night every night for the last decade. They're all worn down, right canine is a plateau of sorts, left looks like it's chipped (really just worn down). No one has ever mentioned it.

>>17419126
Most of my teeth are pretty ok, it's just one of them hasn't grown in since I was a kid, and it sits far back in my mouth. It bothers the fuck out of me and noone has ever said anything about it to me but I don't know if they don't want to be rude or what.

I'm a shy guy, but as far as I know I'm not unattractive.

I'm terrible at flirting and just talking in general, so often I kind of just sneak looks at pretty women... but 9 (ok 7) times out of 10, I look back up and see them smiling at me.

Am I accidentally flirting with these women? Most of them I considered definitely out of my league. Maybe they're just being nice

Lately, I started thinking about my exgf of one year again and about our breakup
Is it a good idea to ask her my questions ? We stayed friends until a month ago, when we stopped talking

Is it possible for a man in his 40s to become friends with a female coworker who is college aged? And I am talking about them being friends not "friends"

>>17419089
>>17419149

Guy here.

Dude, that sounds almost unnoticeable.
One of my front teeth is chipped (faceplanted the ground during a particularly icy winter) and most women don't seem to care.

Then again, I've been told I pull off the bad-boy look and can look quite intimidating.

I mean, I could've just went to the dentist, had it filled in, but I don't know... I like who I am, I don't cover up my scars, my chipped tooth or shit like that. It's my goddamn body, and I like it so fuck whatever anyone else thinks.

My point is, you're insecure over a non-issue, most girls probably won't notice it, and believe me, personality can actually make up for alot of shit.

>>17419295
Women enjoy being looked at, especially if they have the healthy self esteem to not think it's because there's something off about them. What they don't like is being stared at, leered at or having their body visually eaten while completely ignoring their face.
That is an entirely different realm from an appreciative glance.

>>17419410
Depends... think about what you hope to gain here. Are these constructive questions that will help you understand what happened, or are you likely to stir things up and become entangled in old feelings again? (Like probing what she was thinking during a specific fight.)

If you sincerely feel like you are simply trying to understand yourself or the relationship better in order to move on better, ask her. Start with asking if she's okay with talking about it, though, don't fire away. Worst case scenario is that she says no.

>>17419492
Yeah. Not every girl will be interested in this, but it is possible. Realize that a friendship like this comes with a different dynamic, though, and that she as the younger one will likely be more aware of the age gap than you are.

>>17419512
>Realize that a friendship like this comes with a different dynamic
As in how?

>>17419513
Don't try to be something you're not. One of the bonus points of a friendship like this is that it is very easy to get through to the core - it can be very easy and natural for her to ask you about growing older, having been married, having children, having a long term career, whichever one applies. It can be easy for you to relate to her youth and the issues at play then like figuring out your identity, leaving the role you had at home with your parents/siblings, figuring relationships out for the first time. That's a great bonus and there tends to be less cautious small talk with people who differ so much in age, because you have the humanity in common more than the more superficial life stage and experiences.

There are also downsides, though. She will never be able to see you in the proper "context" as much as an age peer and vice versa. To name a simple example, if she does something "young folks do" it can be hard for you to judge how much of that is an individual choice/expression and how much of it is the cultural influence that she is currently in as a twentysomething girl. You have not lived through her circumstances, and she hasn't lived through yours, she won't understand some things about you the way someone of your age could. You have to respect that and keep it in mind, that those blind spots exist. Also that for you to call her out on something or criticize her could have more impact than if someone her age were to do so, because she is more impressed with your life experience than you are, and perhaps to some extent you are a father figure to her. Also a flirtation that could be harmless and innocuous from a guy her age, could be a bit intimidating coming from you.
Obviously what exactly is relevant to what extent also depends on the two individuals involved, but it is something to keep in mind.

And for the record, I'm twenty three and have been friends with men as old as forty five, so this is talking from experience.

>>17419512
>Depends... think about what you hope to gain here. Are these constructive questions that will help you understand what happened, or are you likely to stir things up and become entangled in old feelings again?
Both
I want to know her actual reasons for breaking up
And if she regretted it afterwards, if I could/should have make a move

>>17419521
>actual reasons
What did she tell you at the time?

>>17419520
Are you girl?

>>17419534
Yeah, this is ask the opposite sex...

>>17419537
You mentioned something about flirting. I am not trying to flirt with the girl

>>17419541
It was just an illustration, even in platonic friendships it is not uninmaginable that there's some flirty teasing at some point as a passing moment. My main message was to realize that that (like some other things) could come across differently and more loaded from someone who is in some ways simply ahead of her in life.

It is less about the specific examples and more the message in it that a big age difference is an extra element of influence on your dynamic.

>>17419527
We were in a LDR, but getting near the time we could live together
She started a really hard college year in our school system, the kind that stop you from having a life in order to succeed
After a few months, she said our relationship was boring her and that we had too different life goals
From some of her comments, I think that the actual reason was to focus fully on her studies (we were talking everyday even if I told her many times that we could/should only speak on weekends

A few months ago, when I learned that she failed, it felt like a second breakup for me

>>17419565
Honestly, I don't want to discourage you but it would have been a lot easier for her to tell you that she wanted to focus on her studies more than to tell you that the relationship bored her. Given that the point where you'd be able to see each other more often was nearing, that would also be a natural turning point not just if she wanted more time for her studies but also if she was having doubts about the relationship itself.

If you are hoping that her decision was "just" pragmatic and you can get together again... I think you have to let go of that idea. Wouldn't she have been more eager to reconnect in that case, especially if she knew you to be single and still on speaking terms with her?

I don't think that given these circumstances, it's "wrong" to ask her if the study was a more important factor than she made it out to be. But I also think that in general, how easy you find it to accept a break up has less to do with the reasons or lack of reasons, and more with whether you have succeeded in moving on and coming to terms with what happened. Be prepared to hear an answer that will still leave you unsatisfied in that regard.

To woman:
How much changes your feeling dependent on the position when having sex? Can on be 'boring' and not giving feelings at all but another position awesome?

>>17419565
(cont.)
From my point of view, the reasons she gave me were relatively easy to change

>>17419579
It absolutely matters, you can for example feel disconnected from your partner in a position without eye contact (like doggy), but very close in something like missionary. Or missionary feels proper and boring to you, but doggy feels raunchy and naughty and fun. Some women can only climax when they ride on top and control the depth of penetration and can grind the dick into the right spots.

However if you are wondering whether if a woman dislikes having sex with a man, it is probably a matter of the wrong position - no. That alone isn't enough to make a day and night difference, there's a lot of elements to sex.

>>17419579
Yes. I hate lying on my side during sex, it feels like half as good as any ither position. Doggy style or missionary gives the good angles. Doggy can be absolutely mindblowing for me.

>>17419573
>Wouldn't she have been more eager to reconnect in that case, especially if she knew you to be single and still on speaking terms with her?
While we were friends, we never talked about our past, present and future relationships

>But I also think that in general, how easy you find it to accept a break up has less to do with the reasons or lack of reasons, and more with whether you have succeeded in moving on and coming to terms with what happened.
I understand that, but one of the reasons I can't move on is because the reasons of the breakup still feel wrong/fake/stupid to me
I didn't want to confront her about it because I didn't want to lose what we still had, but now that we have nothing, I'm thinking about it

>>17419548
Well ok. Do you really think I will be seen as a father figure by a girl this age? It's not like I was her teacher

>>17419599
>but one of the reasons I can't move on is because the reasons of the breakup still feel wrong/fake/stupid to me
This happens all the time. It's not the norm that someone breaks up with an unwilling partner and they go "huh, that makes sense I guess". Perhaps after a few years. This takes many shapes. Hearing that for your partner the connection was gone, the romance was dead, you couldn't communicate things well, they had developed a crush on someone else, you didn't have enough priority for them... are all things typically met with a variation of not agreeing or feeling like it could've been resolved together. I think the breaking point in a relationship is often not whether or not something -is- solvable, but whether or not both people involved still -want- to solve it.

You have to accept that apparently your ex either did not think that you could work it out, or simply was not interested anymore in trying. I don't think she will answer you anything that will give you peace of mind.

>>17419601
Not necessarily but possibly. And it's not black and white, it doesn't have to be that either you are her make believe daddy or she doesn't look at you remotely like that. Likely it is somewhere in between. Or she feels like you are her peer in some regards and her superior in others.

>>17419611
Thanks
I think I'll just try to move on and finally forget her

>>17419634
Good luck man, it's never easy.

anyone:

Im 19, my gf is 17. Yesterday we tried having sex for the first time. It was in a bathroom so it was pretty cramped. I asked her but i believe she wasnt super aroused. It was hard to get my penis in but when it got in, she said it felt like she was being stabbed. She's worried thinking theres something wrong with her. I think she wasnt aroused enough and there wasnt enough lube. Help?

>>17419677
if you cant assume, she was a virgin

>>17419677
Definitely not aroused enough and probably not spread enough either. Why would you try doing it in a bathroom?

Even when aroused, I can barely stick two fingers up there, it must've absolutely killed her!

>>17419677
Short rule of thumb:

If she has no issues with fingering herself (actually putting a finger up there) and/or inserting tampons, it was probably a combination of not being aroused enough and not being relaxed enough. If she usually has issues with insertion, look up vaginismus.

Let's be honest, if you wanna get with a girl you gotta be somewhat fit, dress somewhat well, and be somewhat fun to hang out with

No use in getting all heady about it

>>17419680
Also Jesus man, you don't have to be the most gallant romantic guy ever but really, you want to take her virginity while awkwardly cramped in a fucking bathroom? Really?

>>17419618
Well it makes sense now. Would you say you are close to your older friends?

>>17416047
Girls: Do you think that those commercials on TV about skin care and beauty products for women make women seem stupid?
And what do you think about how cleaning products commercials always show women doing the cleaning?
Of course this may change based on your country.

>>17419687
>>17419681
I would have prefered somewhere else alot more. But at the time our options were limited and she really wanted it. I didn't want to hurt her or for it to be uncomfortable as well.

>>17419699
No, but it depends on how you define that. I feel close to them in the sense that I feel safe and open discussing how I look at things and what is happening in my life. Not in the sense that I see them a lot or that they experience a lot of my day to day routine. I don't rule out ever having a significantly older friend that is really he kind of friend I'd do stuff with all the time, but I have never been in a position where that would not seem weird. I value these relationships because they provide me with a different perspective and a different dynamic, but I see no reason to try to model them to the friendships I have with my peers I naturally interact with during lectures and all.

And I don't know how relevant it is to you, but I am friendly with some older women as well and it is very much the same situation (in terms of how often I see them etc). And it is as much about being in a different stage of life as it is about age - I am also friendly with a thirty year old guy in my university year, but he lives a very comparable life to me and I don't really register him as older that much.

>>17419713
Yes. Or not so much stupid, but absolutely vapid. When I look around me I see girls my age struggling to figure out how to be a good friend and a good partner, preparing to find a job and ways to make themselves attractive to an employer, doing volunteer work, making art, emotionally and financially supporting their parents. Switch on the tv and you'd think that women are consumed by the desire to outshine their friends with their ~tee-fucking-hee amazing mascara.
But then again commercials are pretty much always stupid to me. I also loathe the "loveable doofus" trope of the man (or men) who cannot do anything right, with a woman shaking her head in the background. Or the constantly recurring theme that men are bad caretakers and half assing fathers. Both utterly condescending.

>tl;dr yeah, but it doesn't bother me that much because I think commercials overall are insulting and selling mankind short

>>17419735
See, that's why i love infomercials.

Everybody is equaly retarded and nothing else.

>>17419735
>>17419758
That's weird, in my country I swear women are made to look stupid in commercials while men are always either partying and "getting all the girls" or being the typical "good father" in a loving happy family.

>>17419719
Well I see. I just want to befriend her as someone I can chat with every now and then

>>17416197
Looking for conversation partners.

>>17419782
I don't watch TV normaly but from what i've seen the stereotypes are fading, they are focusing more on the strengths their target audience wants for themselves.

Ladies

Something really, really weird just happened. Through a mutual friend of ours, I heard that my ex is now in the hospital on the other side of the world in Vietnam that her vertebrae is collapsed due to a jump from a high level, or so I assume.

I am really confused and shocked. She broke up with me 5 months ago but this news still hits me. Googling the symptoms and all, I am thinking how the recovery process is going and all, and what this will mean for her and her life.

I sent her a text asking how she is and whishing her well and all. What should I do? Do I sent her a card back homwishing her well (this is what I would do for a good friend), what can I do?

>>17419820
If you wish. A card is not going to change anything for her.
Ask her through text how she's doing every few days, ask her if there's something you can do for her, but mostly mind your own business.

>>17419820
Wish her well and check up on her every now and then, just like you would for a friend. It shows that you truly care, rather than just going through the motions, if you regularly ask her how she is recovering.

Girls

Why would a girl not tell you, or ignore questions about her seeing someone? What I mean is, so I have this female friend, we used to have some energy between us. And I asked her last month (cause we haven't talked in an long time) if she met anyone new. she said she met a guy, they weren't "dating" but were hanging out. I told her that's great and I hope things workout for them. I meant that too, I want her to be happy. Well she never ever ever talks about him. Ever. I've asked her recently just as a simple question if things are going well. But she didn't answer that question. She's done this before with another guy too. Like when we first started talking, I didn't even know she had a boyfriend and we had been talking for a few weeks. At the time tho, we were just platonic friends. But still! I was surprised she never mentioned him.

What is this all about?

>>17419834
Some people don't like talking about their private life. I personally don't.
I never mention my boyfriend, most people think I am single. My best friend didn't know about him till 6 months into dating.

>>17419840

It just seems like simple things tho. I mean, I'm not asking about her sex life or anything. Just the casual "hey how's things going?" No different than if someone said to a family man "how's the family?"

>>17417102
Study with timers. Put a timer for 30 minutes first and go through your materials. People usually underestimate the time they have wasted by just day dreaming. Study in short bursts of 30 minutes to 1 hour so you won't feel satisfied if you've just studied for 5 minutes and made some good progress. The ticking clock will keep your mind from drifting off

>>17419830
>>17419832
Your suggestions of checking up on her every now and then is a good one, I will do that.

I sent her another text wishing her a lot of 'get well soon' and a lot of strength. Thanks.

>>17419851
I don't see why I should talk about it.
My private life isn't exactly an interesting topic of conversation.
If things are going well, I'd feel like I'm bragging and no one really cares about it. Like, what should I say? "OMG MY BOYFRIEND IS SO AWESOME". Who gives a shit.
If things are going bad, I'd feel like I'm complaining instead of solving shit.
I mentioned him to my best friend because we went on a trip together.

Girls,
I'm having the same problem that >>17417098 is having. We've gone out twice and things have gotten a bit physical but she doesn't ever initiate the conversation. She still replies promptly whenever I text her but it still messes with me that in 3 weeks she hasn't been the first to text even once

>>17419863
Sometimes I get self conscious that I'm being too clingy or eager if I initiate the convo, so I almost always wait for him to text.

>>17419860

Honestly, you of sound like a austistic bitch. Or you just have no sense of normal social conversation.

There is nothing abnormal about someone asking how you're doing. Especially if you're known this person over a year.

If someone asks how you're doing, and you say "hey! Things are going great with us, thanks for asking!" That's not bragging. Why would you see that as bragging? That's just a positive answer.

>>17419893
Why would she say "us"?
She has a bf not a symbiont attached to her.

>>17419898

Ok, "we are doing great!"?

>>17419900
Why? The same thing i said applies.
She was asked about her not them.

>>17419907

Ugghh ok if the question is "hey, how's things been going with you and that guy?"... I figured that was implied in the other post..

Men: I like to cut up stuffed animals and sew them together into franken-toys. I also like to cut up oversized ones and turn them into costumes/articles of clothing. I find it relaxing.

Is that a huge red flag, or a tolerable quirk?

>>17419920

Post a picture of one of your creations.. Please.

Male asking for females opinion on this.

I'm an avid video game player, I have been for all of my life from the Super Nintendo to the Xbox One, I've always been playing video games for every period of my life. I even did PC gaming while I was a teenager and competed in tournaments and I feel like if I truly committed myself I would've been professional.

I love video games, from Final Fantasy to Counter-Strike. My girlfriend hates it when I play video games. When I was growing up, I had a sister and a mother and it wasn't a big deal. I'd get home from school, and I'd go hide in my bedroom and play video games.

Then, as an adult I'd get home from work, and I'd sit in my living room and play video games.

Now as an adult, with a girlfriend I'm not able to do that simple thing anymore. We have to watch TV, or movies, or anything not video games. Why is it unacceptable for me to play video games in my home when I get off work?

I'm the type of guy that would just like to do what I do, and then when it's time for bed, or if I want to go out to eat, or yaddayaddayadda, we go and do that together.

All I want to do is play video games in my home when I get off work whether my GF is home, or if she's not. Is that a big problem for other women, or just my girlfriend?

With this e-sports craze the past couple years, and tournaments being so easily accessible nearly every week my games are offering tournaments to compete in.. And, I don't ever have the time to commit to be able to play on that level anymore. She's holding me back from my dreams! I want to be a professional e-sports contender.

>>17419893
I am pretty outgoing and people generally like me.
"How is university going? Everything fine at home? Plans for the summer?" - is just banter to fill the silence with acquaintances. I honestly don't want to get close with people who aren't able to have a deep/interesting conversation. And I don't want people I don't give a shit about to know details about my personal life.
If someone asks, I reply. I don't enjoy talking about it and I don't spontaneously mention it.

>>17419929

>I honestly don't want to get close with people who aren't able to have a deep/interesting conversation

Maybe I should have clarified. I'm close or at least used to be very close to this girl. We used to talk about everything, we would talk nonstop, about everything and anything. She's tell me all about her job, her friends, her dog. Just everything. But I was so surprised she never even told me she had a boyfriend at the time. Like, I'm surprised she didn't just mention something about him so I knew he existed. That was when we first met. They broke up a long time ago. But I'm just not getting why she just wouldn't mention it. I'm not at all expecting to have a deep conversation about it. But I'd like to know if a guy exists in her life, because I kind of want to ask her out.

I am a 174cm man am i too short?

>>17419922
I'm not at home right now, but past projects include a leopard/giraffe, a husky/bunny, and I have a black dog right now that I'm thinking should be combined with a raccoon, if I can find one. I'm also currently working on a costume that involves using a panda's head as a mask, the body as a backpack, and I'm going to make a "SLOW: CHILDREN AT PLAY" sign to carry around.

Other plans include using large dog plushes to make a hat, bandeau top, and shorts.

>>17419928
You make me ashamed I play video games. If bait 10/10 but if not, the point of a relationship outside of love and trust is to be together.

Video games is an anti social hobby by nature and adds no real skill for professional progress. Drop that dumb dream you wont achieve or drop your girlfirend. Grow up and get a more productive hobby.

>>17419941
No you are not. Not a girl but 162cm man here, you are within average height.

Should a guy always go in for a kiss on the first date?

Last time, I didn't feel completely comfortable and went for a hug instead. Afterwards, she said she only saw me as a friend and I wonder if it was because I appeared unconfident

>>17419943
We're more together in our relationship than those smart phone staring couples.

We have plenty of trust and love but our hobbies don't match, and I don't see a problem with that. She can do her thing, I can do my thing, and we meet in the middle.

>>17419888
So how far along should the relationship be for me to expect her to text first?

does girls only fall for attractive man they consider only the looks or the personality? i am quite good looking but i have a gloomy personality i never start a conversation i am not even trying to get a gf would it be possible to get a gf that way i am not talkative and i don't want to chase girls

>>17419834
She probably feels you're unrelated to the drama and doesn't want to suck you into it. I do the same thing because I feel theres no point in airing my dirty laundry to people who aren't involved with it anyways and possibly bothering them with it. Like we all have the friend that whines too much about shit none of us can even do anything about. I'm ok with letting a friend vent when they need it, and I vent to my friends sometimes if it's bad enough, but if I'm having a little fight with my bf I'll usually just keep it to myself. Especially if I feel like it will resolve itself easy. She may just not want you to have a bad impression of her bf by venting about a small argument or something that they'll kiss and make up over by the end of the day anyways.
>>17419820
I don't see the harm in sending your condolences, she was someone who was once close to you after all. All you really can do is what you're doing, and mentioning if there's anything you can do to help you're willing. Maybe her parents need someone to watch the house or pets or something while they're over there with her, maybe they even need financial help getting her home and paying hospital bills. You can offer even something as small as $20 or start a gofundme type donation pool among her friends if they need it or would accept it. A friend of my group of friends from high school died recently, even though I didn't know this girl in question very well but I helped my other friends set up the gofundme page because her parents couldn't afford the funeral expenses and we knew they were grieving enough and this would just be one less thing they had to think about in their time of need.
Basically anything like that. Just be helpful, even if it's just lending a listening ear and sending good vibes.

>>17419953
Then make a compromise. If she wants to be with you that is great! I know people need their spare time but do note you are an adult now and sone hobbies, like video games, need to take a back seat.

Its a simple case of you not wanting to grow up. Worst case just play sungle player games, otherwise sort it out.

>smart phone staring couples

Those arent couples. Those are eejits. Its not an achievement to compare yoursrlf to those.

>>17419968
>not wanting to grow up
It's not that, it's wanting to live comfortably.

I work hard, pay all my bills and take care of myself and if I want to come home and play competitive online games until it's bed time, or until we're going to go on a date or something of the like I should be able to do that for at least 3-4 days of the week.

I got enough other responsibilities in life to not be allowed comfort and true relaxation when I'm at home.

>>17419978
It really is. Its a crap hobby and while I know and said that people need their spare time, video games is not one or should be. Or at least comp multiplayer.

In principal what you want is fine: time for yourself. But how you want it is not. Though really if you feel this strongly about it, talk to her.

>>17419978

If you like video games, play video games. She probably has hobbies that she does that you don't stop her from doing.

DO YOU

cool

>>17419940
To me it seems like you overestimated your relationship with her. You talked about very superficial things, and not about private and meaningful stuff. It's the kind of "friendship" that lasts till you run out of things to talk about - not really a deep, meaningful connection.

I honestly don't mention him because I don't see it as something interesting for others - while he's my absolute priority and the most beautiful person I've ever met, I don't think people want to know about how much I love it. No one cares. We don't do anything amazing together, so I don't have fun stories to tell, and we have literally no issues, so I don't feel the need to ask for advice or vent. I didn't avoid talking about him, but it's not like I stressed too much about telling people I'm with him, especially at the beginning.

>>17419983
That's the thing. She doesn't have hobbies! She says she loves to read, she says she'll read a book.

When I go to her place, all her books are in the same position, none are sitting on a night stand, I've never seen her read in 3+ years in the relationship, and all her sitcom dvd's are scattered all over the place.

All she wants to do is soak up my time watching shitty sitcoms. Which is fine and dandy once in awhile, but it's been like, 3-4 shows now and I still haven't even reach 200 hours in the game I'm trying to play at the moment that's been out since November

>>17419963
For me attraction is 30% physical, 70% personality. If there's zero physical attraction, I just can't cope with that, but even if the dude isn't all that hot, he can usually compensate with good traits. Now that being said, since my ratio is skewed the way it is, I'll have a harder time overlooking negative personality traits in favor of good looks, since personality is more important to me. Good looks only carry you so far with I'd say most people.
After all, looks fade, who you are as a person is generally much more stable. It sounds to me like you want to work on yourself, which is a great first step mate. Too many people think all their problems will be solved by finding a gf/bf, when the reality of it is what's best for them (and everyone else) is for them to be single and work on liking themselves first. You should try building up your confidence, practice talking to people, and creating a positive outlook. It's easier said than done I know, but do that and your gloomy personality will soon fade, and people will enjoy being around you in return.
>>17419951
It aint about time really, as it is about comfort level, so no a guy shouldn't ALWAYS go for the kiss on the first date.
I'd say likely if you didn't feel comfortable, she likely didn't either and that's probably why she said that. You just didn't click, it's cool, it happens to everyone. Not everyone is compatible you know? Even if you did go in for the kiss, the outcome probably wouldn't have changed and it would have just been even more awkward.

>>17419920
There is probably something wrong with you. How much i don't know.
>>17419928
She is a cunt if she forbids you to do something.
>>17419968
>giving up hobbies because it's "the grown up thing to do"
Jesus, do what you love, don't hold yourself back because of something as stupid as this.

>>17419985

We have had many deep conversation. She's been through hard times, and I've helped her through it. I've done a lot to support her. She had a terrible panic attack one time, and out of everyone she could have went to for help. She called me at 11pm. And I sat on the phone with her and just talked to her and helped her breathe for 30-40min to calm her down. And the talked with her for a long time. She trusts me.

>>17419986
Talk to her about it. More you post the worse you sound. Plus it sounds like your relationship has a few underlying problems. Get your ass off the comp and talk to her.

>>17419986

Why can't she sit next to you and read a book while you play video games...?

>>17419996
I don't know, it just doesn't work. 'Cause that's my go to solution. I've invested in every hobby she's ever spouted interest in, and none of them stick. I'd do anything just to get her doing something on her own.

I'd have better luck hanging out with my friends at a bar than I would staying in and playing video games.

>>17419941
>>17419941
That's like what, 5'8 for us dumb shit amerifats with our retarded measuring system?
Idk which country you're from, but here in America the average is about 5'9, which is like 175-176ish cm I think. So yeah you might be just slightly under the average, but not enough for anyone to actually notice or care. I find most women, myself included, only care about our dude being taller than us. And since the average for us is about 5'3, or ~160cm, you're going to be fine.
>>17419928
She sounds like maybe she feels a little neglected. I understand completely wanting to unwind after work with your hobbies, but she wants to spend time with you too. Think about it from her perspective, whats the point in dating someone who never has or wants to make time for you? Why are you even together?
If she isn't into vidya and won't play with you, you've got 2 options. You can dump her in favor of your hobby/dreams if you really feel she's taking up too much of your free time, and maybe find yourself a gamer gf who will be ok with you playing video games all the time and could even join you, or you can decide you love your gf and want to split your free time between "me time" and spending time with her in ways you can both enjoy.
Either way, with the rate you're going she's going to leave you anyways. Nothing feels worse than being in a relationship where the other party could care less if you do anything together.

>>17419683
Well yeah, sans the "somewhat fit" part, that just depends on people's individual preference/fetishes in body type (chubby chasers exist in female form too, though rare I'll give.)
What about this is so hard to believe, this is universal between men and women too. No guy wants a whale that never takes care of herself, dresses like a slob, and is boring either.
I think we all strive for someone that actually cares about life.

>>17420003
We do plenty together. I don't do anything alone.

The problem isn't us together, it's me getting time to myself.

We do stuff together, we talk all day while we're at work, we make plans to hang out after work sometimes, not always just coming over to eachothers place, but when she does come over 6/7 daysof the week, I can't play video games. That's where the problem is.

Ladies

Why are girls into celebrities and pop culture? My sister's and female friends are always in the know on retarded celebrity gossip
Same with sick TV shoes like the Bachelor and other shit reality TV

Explain yourselves ladies. Why are women enthralled by popular culture trash?

>>17419677
Basically this >>17419682
My first attempt was similar to your experience. I was scared shitless, we were in a rush before his parents came home, and I was just overall too young and not ready. The tip of his dick hit the entrance and my whole body shut down.
But I also came to learn I have vaginismus as well so that didn't help the experience.
To me though, I feel she just wasn't into it. and for fucks sake man, no girl deserves to lose her virginity in a fucking bathroom. Idk if you have to shill out and rent a hotel for a night, give her a fucking memorable experience you fuck idc how much she thinks she wants it.
I'll tell you this though for virgins, limited time and options are the 2 biggest ingredients for an awful fucking time that will shape her ideas about sex for a long time, if not forever. Even if just on a subconscious level. Next time, make the time for it since she's now expressed that she's emotionally ready for it. Seriously, give her a really romantic night. First time sex isn't really great, fun, or pleasurable no matter what, but you can at least make it somewhat you know?

>>17420016
First, not ALL girls are. Most girls I know actually aren't.
Some girls like gossip for the same reason why some guys like sports. It is somewhat entertaining and all people they hang out with are into it. If everyone you know talks about something, you inevitably get interested in it to be involved in conversation.

>>17420016
Is your sister 16? That might explain it.

I have no clue how to answer this otherwise. I could care less about celebrity gossip, my idea of reality tv is Pitbulls and Parolees, and the only pop culture I'm interested in is usually in the form of video games and internet shit.
>>17420007
Then talk to her about it. Say you need more time for yourself, that you're willing to spend time with her but you need "me time" too. If she can't understand that then she's too clingy.
Only other thing I have to say is
>we talk all day while we're at work
You can't count that as time spent with her. There's a stark difference between "work time" and "personal couple time", because when you're at work your priority always has to be your job and not one another. Even if you have meaningful conversations or whatever at work, only count time spent with her as time where she's the priority.

>me and boyfriend having a good time
>then out of nowhere he starts doing [activity I hate doing and he knows I hate doing it]
>I'm just standing there watching him because I don't want to do it
>He does it for an hour while I tell him I want to leave/do something else/I'm bored
>Gets angry at me because I killed his fun by wanting to leave/do something else/telling him I'm bored doing nothing

Why does he do this? Often times it'll be an activity where I legitimately can't participate in (ex: he'll play vidya). He'll get mad at me for being disinterested at standing there watching him do whatever and say I'm being a selfish bitch because I ruined [activity he knows I want no part in he randomly started doing for an hour while we were doing something else] that made him happy.

>>17420040
give him more alone time so he doesn't have to try and squeeze it in when you're forcing yourself in his presence.

>>17420040
Ask him to do those activities when he's alone (and actually leave him alone).
Or just fucking do something else while he's busy - read a book, surf the internet, watch a tv show or youtube videos.

He's rude and you're being a bitch.

>>17420034
Because sports are like modern day gladiators
We don't talk about Miguel Cabrera's personal life, we talk about his OPS

>>17420048
He's the one inviting me out!

>>17420051

I've asked him but he doesn't stop.

And how am I a bitch?

>he invites me out for a walk and restaurant
>we walk past Mexican place playing Mexican music
>he dances to it for an hour despite me telling him I'm bored and starving constantly

How does that make me a bitch? I don't want to put up with my boyfriend having no regard for me?

>>17420064
People watch sports because it is entertaining and it is a decent conversation topic. It doesn't really have any value and doesn't improve your life.
I love watching soccer and I regularly watch races, swimming and diving competitions. It's not like it makes my life any better, but I enjoy doing it and I like commenting with my boyfriend or my friends.

For some girls, reading about celebrities or watching realities is entertaining in the same way.

>>17420079
I guess that makes sense
The concept of the Bachelor is still sick though

>>17420085
I don't honestly know what the bachelor is.
So... maybe?

>>17420068
>can i come over?
>uhh, yeah, i guess i was just going to play video games though
>UGH WHY'D I BOTHER COMING OVER IF YOU'RE JUST GOING TO PLAY VIDEO GAMES

>>17419920

>Franken-toys.

That's pretty fucking cool.
And my dog would love you, he'd chew up all the scrap toys and shit.

You need to get a transformers plushie and a stuffed shark to make a stuffed mecha-shark.

You make that for a guy, and he's all yours, you adorable, awesome freak (in a good way).

>>17420089
Its a reality show where a single dude has like 5 or 6 single women he goes on dates with and at the end of each show he boots one girl off the island so to speak. By the end of the season he's picked his "dream girl" out of the batch. Like most reality shows, its heavily staged and the pair most likely never speak to one another again/don't actually become a couple.

>>17420100
Nah, that's life. Sometimes you gotta cut out people if they're risking your life/wellbeing or if you just cease to have anything in common with anymore. I had a friend in high school who I had known all my life. He mother died of cancer around our junior year, I tried to help her though it the best I could, but she started doing hard drugs and I couldn't do anything to stop her. Even though I felt bad about abandoning her when she was struggling so much, I had to cut her off or else I was going to get in legal trouble or seriously injured/killed myself.
Another group of friends I had in high school just kinda became deadbeats, all they do now is casual drugs (weed and shrooms), drink, party and all that noise. They have no ambition to improve their lives or be anything but the stoner living at their parents house so I found I didn't have much in common with them anymore. I still hang out with them from time to time, but not frequently.
Basically if it's not that they're dangerous to be around, you don't have to dump them completely. But even still, theres no point in hanging around people you have nothing in common with anymore, so it's completely fine and natural to move on with your new life and friends. If possible though, if you haven't already, I'd just slowly distance yourself from them and keep the doors cracked you know? Who knows, they may change a few years down the road and have more in common with you now and you can reconnect. But all in all I just always find it more beneficial to be on good terms with someone than bad, even if I don't ever see them again.

>>17419920
A bit out of the ordinary, but sounds like a fun and creative hobby.

>>17420016
>Why are girls into celebrities and pop culture?

This isn't a girl thing, dude. This is just an American thing.

>>17419920
It's a little strange, but in a good way. I wouldn't open with that on the first date, though.

Do women in the modern context expect to be together with somebody forever?

I just broke things off with my girlfriend of 1.5 years and she told me many times when things were great that we would be married, and together forever.

Is it just melodrama? Or do some girls actually mean it?

I just ask because that is what I want is to be together with 1 person until I die but idk if women are like that.

>>17420602
Yes, it's a dream of mine to have that kind of close connection with someone that we would both want to be together forever,
but I also recognize this is a very VERY rare concept that actually happens. More people are divorcing these days, and of the ones that arent, are only together because of moral/religious/tax reasons.
It's kind of a dying practice as people are realizing how impossible it is. That being said, I'd like to be the one in a million that pulls it off, but I'd never even bring up marriage until I had been dating someone for much longer than 1 and half years. Try 5 years minimum. Some girls (and a handful of guys too) are very dramatic about it. They "fall in love" fast and hard without actually realizing they don't really know that much about their partner, and then are surprised when it fizzles out just as quickly.

>>17420602
>>17420627
Also the younger and more immature you are, the more common the "omg im so in lurrrvv with my bf we're gonna be married even though I've only known him for 2 months!!11" types are. Once you're older you don't find that as often.