Is a long distance relationship ever a good idea?

For your situation probably not
I think LDR only work if you both we already dating before it went long distance and there's a plan to be together again

>>17407644
Relationships already fail when people see each other every day. Go for it, who cares.

I'm in a long distance relationship with a backpacker who's 10hrs away picking fruit to stay in the country another year.

If you clicked and then why not try?

>>17407644
The only way a long distance relationship would work is if both parties know that they will be together in a close to medium future, if not its doomed, things get to cool down a lot faster than "close" relantionships and of course, you meet a lot of people, so that even makes it cool down faster, like a fuck ton faster.

But sure, go for it, have fun both of ya, and maybe, only maybe it will work

I'm not OP but is my gf being away for 4 weeks exclusively with family a LDR? I am not sure of what counts and what doesn't.

I was basically on your position, minus the positive encounter (I was essentially a kissless virgin that had never even been on a date.)

I ended up in an LDR (met online) and I fell in love with her. I made it clear how I felt, we made it a relationship, and within 2 years I had moved to her and we are now living together, nearing our 9 year anniversary.

So yes, it can be a good idea. The catch? You both have to be equally and heavily committed and with a clear plan in place to be together.

>>17408022
A month is long, but I don't think that counts. I would say anything over 3 months apart is a true LDR, anything else is just a normal relationship in a shitty situation (because it sucks to be apart.)

Thar said, it is better to treat it like an LDR - lots of contact, be faithful, and try to stay close.

Get a Norwegian gf

>>17408053
I'd love to but how to get one and eventually bring her here in Quebec or move out there. Here people are extremely extroverted and I can't quite fit in. That's why I'm looking for a quieter or more conservative gf

>>17407644

>Is a long distance relationship ever a good idea?

Typically, no.

>I live in Canada and I can't get any girl that shares my values

Irrelevent. Your inability to make a connection with a girl in close proximity is not an issue with your geography and it most certainly isn't going to be solved by attempting to make a connection with someone you never see or touch. Its a cop out.

A real relationship requires proximity, compromise and close communication. The fact is that this is impossible through a computer screen. In long distance relationships you aren't really dating that person, you're just dating who you want them to be. You're dating the honeymoon phase of a relationship without ever having to sit in those awkward moments of a relationship where you and your girlfriend are in the same room together, pissed off at each other and forced to work through it.

The fabric of a relationship can't be strong at all if the solution to turmoil is to click the exit button on your Skype and go about your day.

>It has come to a point that my friends avoid me because I am perceived of lower value that I can't get any girlfriend/female friend

Your friends don't like you because you can't get a girlfriend? That makes no sense to me.

*shrug*

That's like a 3 hour one way drive on the weekends.

200km isn't THAT far apart if you're both willing/able to travel to see one another and stay in contact through other means (Skype/facetime/whatever).

It is however, going to be SIGNIFICANTLY harder than if meeting each other was something you could do at the drop of a hat, especially when something serious happens in either of eachothers lives and logistics is the reason you can't be there for eachother.

>>17408066
>Norwegian girl
>conservative
lol, who do you think we are?
And why the fuck would a Norwegian girl be moving to a French-speaking part of an even colder part of the world?

Why not move to Norway? If you're already used to the climate, it's a pretty based.

Anyway, I got a lot of experience with LDRs. There's no right answer. It's been a fucking hard struggle, but as far as long term is concerned, I've been on-again-off-again with my main woman for six years. We've been LDR, living together, fwb, had different lovers both of us, thought we were never going to see each other again, and a week ago she told me I'm her soul mate and we'll always be in each other's lifes, yet we both know we don't know what the future holds. I love her timelessly, but I'm too old to let that getting in the way of fucking and even developing romantic relations with other girls. Like haven't seen her since beginning of February, and we might not see each other before next summer, but the love is real. Whether it's going to be a sweet success story is to early to tell, but I don't regret anything, even though it's driven me to the edge and back. She's my constant.

But I would never consider a LDR with anyone else. I've wasted too many years if my life growing strong already. Contradictory, I know, but true. I gave up my dream of being a dad by now over her. And I'm glad I did, and it breaks my heart.

>>17408077
I'm seen as a social reject. I have many friends from my job, most of them younger and they can't take me seriously or respect me because of my inability to have a gf ( think social status). Now that I am talking about it, I don't even think they respect me and just take advantage of me.

>>17408111
Why not? And here being colder is a meme. There's like 2weeks of intense cold then the rest is warm enough. I just don't know, northern europeens seem more introverted/reserved to me. I just can't adapt here. Moving to Norway would be pretty hard for me.

>>17407644
I'm in a situation close to your scenario #2. I live in an extremely liberal area full of disgusting degenerates, and I'm extremely conservative and old-fashioned, so I have no choice but to do LDR. Shit sucks, man.

>>17408200
Like the other guy said, this is irrelevant.

You want to change everything by getting a girlfriend, when the truth is you you won't get a girlfriend until you change everything.

It really doesn't matter whether some folks are respecting you or not. For all you know, they might have a great amount of respect for you, but you're too occupied with your self-pity to notice. Solution? Act as if you got all the respect in the world. Expect to still be experiencing loneliness, but you will unavoidably affect people you interact with.

Do yourself the curtesy of acknowledging that you don't deserve a girlfriend until you understand what it takes to be a good boyfriend. Moving won't change anything - do you really thing Norwegian girls aren't picky and high maintenance? Just work on yourself dude

You'll be a better fucken

>>17408221
But tell me, what should I do? It's been 2 years since I did a complete 180 with my life. I am a 23y/o kv, living on my own in a okay appartment with a cool job, nice car, full of hobbies, got a great physique (not jacked but athletic)... I never talk about girls with my friends, I did go a few times full /pol/ and redpill but I am respectful with everyone. I am not a full blown nice guy but the way I was raised, I just can't be alpha/dominant. It's against my nature, even if I tried to change a lot.

I am truly lost

>>17408228
So what do you think is the problem? If you are truly this fine specimen, are you hypothesizing that the approximately 500,000 Quebecois ladies close to you in age just can't see it? Do you really think that all 500,000 of those girls want an "alpha" male? Or, is it more likely an issue with you and/or how you are going about this?

If your personality is totally perfect, it could be that you aren't meeting enough people. You say you don't talk to your friends about girls. Do you think they know you don't want to be single? Have you tried online dating? Are your hobbies social ones, or ones that you can translate to social situations to meet girls?

If you are meeting lots of girls and not clicking with any of them, again the problem is likely you. It is very difficult to recognize our own flaws without assistance, so you could either talk to your friends, particularly female friends, family, or a therapist.

>>17408228
>lost
Tbqh you are what ever you say you are.

I'm not here to tell you not to be a nice guy. I usually treat women good as well. I'm pretty sure it's part of the reason women fall in live with me (not that there's been that many,) but anyways...

I am 32. I haven't lived in a proper apartment for 3 1/2 years. I got what NOK 300.000 in PRIVATE dept - that's in addition to NOK 400.000 in student loan, for a degree that is worth basically nothing. Alright, I take cafe of my looks to some degree, but atm I got a fucking Taliban-tier beard (I'm quadroon, so people already mistake me for being Egyptian or whatever (I'm mix of Northern European and Equatorial Atlantic) and I'm only just below 5'10", and always been skinny (borderline underweight most of my life, gain some in last year.) Basically, you won't have any difficulties finding better boyfriend material in Norway.

I can't even provide for myself. I'm basically a hobo.

None of the above is working against me getting laid. I fucked I girl for three hours less then a week ago. I've (unwillingly) made a solid 8/10 Amazonian built fucking restaurant manager a fucking lovesick wreck not five months ago. I've dated a Top Model contestant, I've dated a Cartoon Network executive, I've dated single moms, I've had women run back to me after divorcing their husbands, etc.

Did I use to be a neet loser weeb meme? Yes, somewhat. Are anyone ever actually hopeless? Not unless you admit to the fact and let the idea run your life.

Get better ideas.

>>17408240
I don't beg for my friends that I want a gf because that is weak and pathetic but I always hint like "Yeah I'd like one, someday I will find a good one" but they are pretty much indifferent and they bring girls to other single guy in our group but never to me. I tried dating websites for months. I tried all of them. Had a dozen of matches in total, rarely a reply. Hobbies are track and field, kayaking, cycling, some rock climbing, guns and maybe photography pretty soon.

>pic related, have a very similar face to him

File: tyler-hansbrough-raptors.png (100KB, 350x254px) Image search: [Google]

100KB, 350x254px

>>17408276
Oops forgot pic

>>17408276
Don't even bother with pic related. Like most other guys your age you're hung up on exterior reasons why women should fuck you.

Protip: learn how to build attraction. I'm not even asking you to change whatever you meant by >>17408228
>I just can't be alpha/dominant. It's against my nature, even if I tried to change a lot.
I don't trust that you understand what alpha or dominant entails. You need to be assertive and confident - not because you need to, but because women need you to in order to feel alright about whatever they're going along with. I promise, it's a good thing, and also the more you practice the easier it gets.

I'm pretty sure we won't get very far in this thread, but you should definitely just go out any talk to women. Don't set it as a goal that you should meet someone for anything serious, but just to get used to talking to them. You'll be surprised.

Just to give you some concrete advice, listen to these three talks. For inspiration at least.

http://youtu.be/b-a1jXgAsQI

http://youtu.be/qigOUdAOyRs

http://youtu.be/-juyEIgwhGQ

Not OP, but have a related question
>met this guy online
>know him for like 3 years now
>recently had to drop contact for few months
>during that time realized I'm actually in love with him
>we never met irl
>i never told him how i feel
He lives like 6h away from me, and we're both in college right now, so no way we could live together until in +2 years
Go for it or nah?

>>17408340
Go for it AND nah