my relationship with my mothers parents has always been great. as a child they took care of me often after school while my mom supported me by herself. they've played a great role in my life and i am very close with them
i'm turning 21 this year and i have moved out to a city a few hours away. i visit once or twice a month.
although recenty, they have been aging at a quick rate and have been growing more and more bitter. i can't even make a joke anymore without them turning it into some dark, existential commentary. after hanging out with them, i am always dragged down and feel awful because they are so dry.
today i am at home, and i am supposed to visit them, but its now noon and i haven't called them. i just don't fucking want to. i'd rather research music theory or read a book and not have my day sucked up by a couple of pessimists. i do love them, but it fucking sucks seeing them now.
its a bit childish to be intolerant of my family now that i am finally independant, and i do not believe that i should just ~stop~ seeing them because i absolutely love them... but how can i fix this? how can i visit them without them fucking my day up? how do i make it easier for myself to contact them to set up a hang out? i just can't fucking do it.
>>17395076
don't do it today. just visit less frequently. it is an unfortunate and natural part of life, and ur grandparents are no exception. if they are down and sad about it, visit them once a month, and only for dinner. perhaps they will change with time. perhaps they will get worse. adjust accordingly. its okay to not want to be around awful people.
my dads awful to. see him twice a year
>>17395076
Visit. Trust me, you will regret it if you don't. If it is difficult, give yourself an exit - "I can only stay an hour this time because I have to . . . ."
And phone them once a week. Again, you can control the time, and it will mean an enormous amount to them, and to you.