I don't know what information I should retain and focus on when compared to other people. I'm 20 and I never had close friends to text or trust. I only trust myself. I've met people, but I don't understand trust levels. I'm constantly on edge, but I try to keep it under control. People say they notice that I need to calm down, but the truth is I can't. I always expect something bad to happen. I can fake my behavior and facial expressions to fool people. I've met people that trust me right off the bat some how. I don't understand exactly how my age group thinks because I spent my early years playing computer games with like 30+ year olds. I feel god awfully alone and can't connect with people personally. I never share how I really think so I sort of have to play along with the other peoples personalities.
>>17392421
> I feel god awfully alone and can't connect with people personally
Maybe that is your problem? You're trying to connect to everyone at a personal level when you shouldn't. You should only connect people at a personal level if you feel as if they are deep friends. Otherwise just associate with people as you would anyone else and don't feel pressure to do anything differently.
Don't try to "match" their personality, instead, just be yourself.