First Abortion

>>17329148
Also, should I tell the sperm giver what I've done to 'our' child bc he doesn't know I had become pregnant, just that I was worried about if I had my period late/not at all. It was a one night thing but I'm not sure if he's above the idea of contacting me for a booty call. I feel like he should know, but at the same time, I don't want him to possibly get mad and tell everyone how much of a bitch and slut I am. Which I guess desu I do deserve happen to me.

>>17329309
*guess to be honest

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don't beat yourself up over this. yes, you fucked up by having an ons. yes, you fucked up by not being more carefull with bc. but remember that a lot of girls do that and just get fucking lucky to never get any consequences from it.
it will hurt. but you'll get over it. it's like having really bad period cramps. how far along are you?
also, i wouldn't tell the guy. you already made your choice and it's not as if he can give you any emotional support since he's just a random dude you had sex with.
i also strongly doubt that he would want you to keep it.
how well do you cope with the fact that you are getting an abortion so far?

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It happens. You're not a bad person, don't dwell on it like I did when the girl I was seeing got pregnant. Move on as best you can.

Had the guy been your bf I would say to tell him for sure. In this case I'll tell you to keep it to yourself.

It's not going to be that bad. It won't exactly be pleasant but don't expect anything unbearable. Grit your teeth and all that and it'll be over before you know it, k?

For what it's worth, you seem to be having a healthy attitude about this. You know you were careless, you know you fucked up, you feel guilty about being irresponsible this time, and you're determined not to get into this situation again. That's very very good. (I realize it may sound weird to say it's good that you're feeling bad about your actions, but that's what keeps us from repeating them.)

I'm sure some of the hardcore anti-abortion types will be along shortly to tell you what a horrible person you are and that you'll regret this forever and all the other shaming tactics that they try to employ. If you were the sort who relies on abortion as birth control and has no qualms about getting one as often as needed, then those people might have some room to talk but that doesn't apply here so don't take such comments to heart. You're not a horrible person, you're a person who's made a mistake and is now taking measures to deal with that mistake in the best way possible given the circumstances.

Dunno the exact stats off the top of my head but of the women who got an abortion early on, those who went on later to have children at a time when their lives were more in order and could provide a healthy environment and home and whatnot are not a small number. There of course are women who regret it forever and get so traumatised that they don't ever have kids later on, but they're the ones who let the pro-lifers shame them into being unable to think straight. The decision you make is the right decision for you, end of story.