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I found a newborn, blind kitten on the 22 of April, and since then I've been taking care of it.
I've been nursing it, feeding it, keeping it warm, playing with it since it's first days here until today. It had no one but me.
It started to walk, play, eat on it's own, it grew fond of me - always went whereever I went around the house, it even started to sleep on my clothes and in my bed.
The problem is that it didn't want to use it's litter box, even though I trained it, and it made a mess around the house, which I always had to clean.
This morning it pooped behind the couch, I said that I've had enough, I kicked it a few times, then took it and placed it in a nearby yard where there are lots of cats. It's been more than a month now, should be OK outside on it's own, I figured. Besides, the people around here always feed street cats.
I went to check on it after 30 or 40 minutes, it hadn't moved an inch and was just about to start crying for help. So I took it and brought it back home, despite the beating I gave it earlier.
The kitten was cold, so I started to warm it up with clothes and botteles full of hot water. This went on for a few hours.
It tried to walk but couldn't, had trouble breathing and couldn't keep his head up. I examined it, but there were no broken bones or any trauma that I could find.
I took the kitten in my arms, it was suffering, couldn't move much, struggled to breathe, I started to cry and apologize, then I pinched it's little nose in after a few seconds it stopped breathing. His heart stopped a few minutes after that. I performed CRP, but it died.
So I cried, and apologized, and prayed that, wheever it has gone now, I hope that she finds someone better than me. I burried in in a forest, under a tree.
I have always thought to be a lover of children and animals, and what I did proves to contrary. People like me should be chemically castrated and not allowed anywhere near children or animals.
I
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Try asking her out.
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What the fuck did I just read. Post this on /an/ and watch the shitfest start. Tons of crazy cat ladies over there, all infected with toxoplasmosis.
You didn't have to beat the cat. Just pick it up by the scruff and throw it outside for a few minutes. Good job. Now you fucking killed it
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I saved this little kitten only to kill it a month after. I killed my little friend, who was so kind and good, who loved me and when I wasn't around it went to look for my clothes or pillow.
I killed this kitty, that was my gratitute for all the affection it had for me.
I killed my little friend, it was so small and warm, so good.
It was here, and then it was not here, the little playful kitten, who didn't want much, just love, and I couldn't even give it that.
I am a horrible human being and I believe I should kill myself. Maybe then I'll meet the kitty again and undo this great sin.
I named her Pufinka, she was a girl.
I am so sorry, little love. 22.04.2016 - 29.05.2016
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>>17195485
Just out of idle curiosity, why have you chosen to tell us thuis story?
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>>17195510
She's in a better place now. I know this hard for you OP but I'm sure shes happy now. Don't take yourself down with her.
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Opie I can't provide much sympathy. I hate cats but I don't want to kill a kitten. Kittens are much better than cats since they're not total assholes yet. What you did was wrong
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I understand being frustrated with training being unsuccessful, but that is no excuse.
poor thing was BLIND and probably just needed more time to adjust to the litter box. kicked it a few times, really? midway through the first kick you should've felt immense guilt
"attempting" to help it after you had abused and abandoned it doesn't make up for a single thing. if you wanted to help you could have gone to a vet and said you found a stray in the street. they'd probably operate and give it some anesthesia so at the very least it wouldn't have to die suffering.
fuck chemical castration, people you deserve surgical with a rusty dull blade. fuck you.
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>>17195566
but I don't want to be too harsh since it's clear you feel terrible
make amends by helping other little friends in need
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Is this a meme or something? Why the fuck would you post this here
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>>17195566
>>17195581
She was blind when I found her.
After a week or so she could fully see, then she started to walk, and after that she started to run around the house and climp on the furniture, and play with everything.
She refused to adjust to the litter box, I trained her for at least two weeks. I had enough of cleaning poop and piss all the time, today I decided to discipline her, but I went too far.
Perhaps she stayed outside more that it should have - it's at least 18 C in the morning, but it was just 1 month and a week old. Perhaps I hit her too hard - either way it is my fault.
That's not an excuse for what I did, I shoud've been better, I shoud've been more patient.
This is not the way to treat a little thing that loves you. A one time mistake which was fatal for her.
Some day I will pay.
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>>17195510
bro its a cat lul who the fuck cares indians die like erryday n shit lmfao
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>>17195613
Cats are better than you'll ever be.
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>>17195485
What the fuck was going through your mind when you started CPR after a poor attempt at mercifully ending its life?
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>>17195485
>beating a fucking kitten
What the fuck is wrong with you? Do you have autism?
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>>17195616
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>>17195500
God damn. These little keks are why I come to 4chan,
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>>17195504
Not OP, but a good idea is a good idea.
>>>/an/2133144
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>>17195613
Saved.
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>>17195613
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I'm sorry to hear that you're hurting. What you did was wrong, but it's good that you realized the error of your ways.
See a therapist, though. Seriously. Aside from helping you work through your anger issues, it may also help this new bout of what may otherwise blossom into depression.
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>>17195882
This. It's important that you get help.
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