My boyfriend is always telling me I'm too emotional. I usually

>>17108899
By taking meds to fix your crazy.

>>17108899
Well how can you tell you're overreacting?

Try giving us an example and see what others think
But prepare yourself for "kill ur self" post and filter those out

Objectivity is an abstract concept. It is not a thing and humans can never hope to attain it because to observe something you have to exist and to exist you have to take up physical space which means you have a perspective.

The only way we can help you is if you tell us the specific things. Then we can give you our opinions and see if it is you who is crazy or if it is your boyfriend who is being a dick.

Your feelings are never "wrong". You have a reason to feel them! You might get emotional faster than others, but to you, it's the right pace for whatever reason. Either your bf is a real asshole (which i think is the case), or you need some professional help (which might also have a part in this). Don't bottle emotions up to "please" him!! NEVER do that. Either find a more understanding bf or find out why you are so emotional and fix THAT instead

>>17108899
Here OP I think you should watch this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Zxnw0l499g

>What if I am over reacting to everything? How can I tell if I am?
You ask some very good questions here. I think everybody should ask themselves these questions, it's a sure sign of maturity. I don't know you personally and therefore I don't know whether your boyfriend is right or not. However I can think of three signs that happen when our emotions take over in a bad way: we raise our voice, we cut other people when they talk and we stand closer to them. When we catch ourselves these things then it is best to catch some rest and think things over before continuing a conversation.

Maybe this can help.
http://www.wikihow.com/Avoid-Overreacting

My wife does the same thing an it pisses me off to no end one moment everything is good then she's silent or crying in the corner telling me I'm fine or ignoring me, I just want to slap the stupid out of you.

>>17108972
>It is not a thing and humans can never hope to attain it because to observe something you have to exist and to exist you have to take up physical space which means you have a perspective.
So I guess you've never taken a basic philosphy, critical thinking, reasoning, or math class then?

>>17108971
>>17108972

Some random examples I guess:

I want to go out to the bars with all my friends for my 21st birthday. I ask if he's going to come, he says no because he thinks going to the bars is stupid and cliché. I get sad because I want him to be there for my birthday.

or

I tell him about one of my favorite movies and how I want to watch it with him. When I tell him what it's about, he dismisses it as stupid and refuses to ever give it a chance. I get sad.

or

I'm sad because we haven't had sex in a while. It's because of his new sleeping meds that he doesn't want to, so he tells me I shouldn't be sad since it's not like he isn't attracted to me anymore or something. I'm still sad because there is still no sex happening.

am I being crazy? pls help

>>17108987
Yeah I'm thinking a therapist might be helpful. You are such a nice person, thank you!

>>17109036
oh this is cool, thanks!

>>17109062
sounds like you and your wife need some marriage counseling

anyone wanna give me feedback if i'm being too crazy?

>>17109085
>>17109699

we'd love to help but we re all robots
> we all lie to post with reCAPTCHA
so that level of feedback from your BF is normal for us.

but your not wrong for feeling sad in any of those cases, unless your bursting into tears and its ruining the rest of your night. Your BF does sound a bit douchy in those examples. hash things out, to be together require commitment on both sides.

>sleeping pills
try having sex in the morning rather than at night.

>>17108899

There's always going to be people out there who dismiss your feelings as crazy. The trick with dating is finding someone who treats your feelings as valid at least most of the time.

>Have boyfriend
>Slowly starts saying non-committal and flagrantly rude shit to me
>Calls me a 7, ditches me to hang out with his friends, tells me he can't imagine loving me forever, et fucking cetera
>Bring up how much it hurts my feelings
>Eventually dumps me for being too sensitive

>>17109699
You're not crazy. Based on your examples, your feelings are justified. I'd feel the same way.
He's being a jerk. If he really cares about you, he should not be so dismissive of your feelings.

>>17109699

Well, from the examples provided, he's an asshole that doesn't give a shit about you and doesn't know the meaning of compromise. Also he sounds like a real douche. Going to a bar for your 21st birthday isn't 'cliche'. Who would even think in those terms? Find someone better than that sad sac

>>17109742
I do try to seduce him in the morning :/
unfortunately its a kind of sleeping medication that's basically an antidepressant and it kills his sex drive throughout the whole day

>>17109760
wow that's terrible
my boyfriend is not that bad, thankfully

>>17109775
I KNOW he's so stupid uhhhggg
Probably not going to break up with him though, I'm gonna try to talk to him about it and hopefully he'll try to be nicer

Exactly what kind of things do you get emotional over?

If you want to stay with him then you should try and do what he says. Otherwise find someone else who will tolerate your shit.

>>17109813

>anti-depressant
I know what you mean, I took some for a few years, really does kill the mood, what always perked me up was my GF going at it alone, not always for the full sexual intercourse thing, but into the love-love territory.
If he just need the sleep, find other medication without that aspect.

Otherwise if he is on anti-depressants it can stifle all emotions which would make you seem more emotional in given situations.

you've had your bar and beers so remember to be adult in the handling

>>17109085
Sounds to me like he's just blaming you for his actions or shortcomings.

>>17109760
Mine did the same to me. Would intentionally do things that would make me angry. Get angry. Wow you're so emotional!!11

>>17109825
Read the thread.

>>17109844
>not always for the full sexual intercourse thing, but into the love-love territory
sorry, what do you mean?

He's taking it just for sleep, in a much lower does than what's prescribed for depression. He's already tried a lot of other sleep medications that didn't work very well.

>>17109856
Any suggestions on what I should say to him? I don't want to straight out say "I think you're blaming me for your actions or shortcomings"
But yeah I feel like he's asking me to pretend to be happy when he can't pretend to be a nicer person

>>17109085
I would react the same way you did if my boyfriend did those things to me. Yours sounds immature or just plain inconsiderate. We probably think the same way, "If he cared about me at all, why wouldn't he make the effort to be with me for my birthday, watch a movie with me, or have sex with me?" Some medications can affect libido and arousal. But the other two scenarios just take willingness.

>>17110151
dude yes that's literally exactly how i feel

>>17108899
I dunno OP, I was in a relationship with a girl who would cry at the drop of a hat, was always upset over random shit, and was just a total handful to deal with. I'm not saying either of you is in the right, but as someone who's dealt with that, it really does start to take it's toll on the significant other to the point where they just can't give a shit anymore.

You should probably listen to what's he's saying though instead of reacting. If he was being malicious it'd be more obvious. He just doesn't wanna do shit he doesn't wanna do, and he's being honest about it rather than pretending and pussyfooting. He could be gentler probably, but it's unfair to get emotional about it when he's trying to be straight with you.

Real dickery is if he's unwilling to compromise, calls you derogatory names, threatens you, etc

He sounds like a straight to the point guy who has no ill will

>>17110151
That's a super unfair thought born out of insecurity
If the dude didn't 'care enough' why would he put up with you at all or even be there for you to ask him to do stuff
I'm sure there's other stuff he would do for you

>>17110195
Yeah that's what I'm worried about :/

I really don't want to make him unhappy with our relationship, but I am finding it really hard to pretend that all the dickish stuff he does doesn't bother me

>>17110210
dammit you are very right as well
I can't help getting sad about some of these things though, like I understand why he doesn't want to come celebrate my birthday but I'm still sad that he doesn't want to

>>17109085
Reactions can mean a lot here. In these examples it's reasonable both for him to reject them and for you to be bothered by that rejection. What is done is what counts here.
Are you reduced to a blubbering mess? If so, you should probably reconsider the seriousness of the situation.
Is he offering something else you like(this is important, something YOU like) in place of the things he doesn't want to do? If not he's being very inconsiderate and maybe a little selfish.

>>17110219
It just feels unfair, since I would totally do all those things for my boyfriend and if he didn't feel the need to reciprocate I would be upset too

>>17110237
I never cry, I just get quiet and a little sullen. I try to hide it sometimes, but he's good at telling when I'm sad.
He definitely does not offer to do other stuff in place of things he doesn't want to do

>>17110259
Does he take time to understand your feelings? Does he know why you're sad that he didn't want to go to your birthday party, or that he shoots down movies you like (aka you trying to share things with him)?

What does he do that makes you feel loved? What are some affectionate things he does?

>>17110259
Yeah, not a good sign that. If he never returns a rejection with a counter offer it gives the impression he's not really thinking about you.

>But yeah I feel like he's asking me to pretend to be happy when he can't pretend to be a nicer person
If this is, in fact, the case, then there's really nothing to be done. You two are not going to work out together. At least not right now. Maybe he'll mature after a while, maybe he won't. The question is, how long are you willing to put up with it.

>CAVEAT!
However,
>anti-depressant
did he seems different after he started them? These can, ironically, actually cause depression sometimes. Brain chemistry is still practically voodoo and doctors are often just making a best guess as to dosage and chemical to use. Invariably, sometimes stuff goes wrong. If you suspect something, explain the situation try to get him to see his doctor.

>>17110247
>I would be upset too
So, pretty much, you would get upset about anything.

>>17110274
Not really. Usually he asks my why I'm sad and I'll say "You don't want to watch my favorite movie with me" and he'll laugh it off and say something like "That's a stupid reason to get sad" or "I hate those kinds of movies, you can't expect me to want to watch that"
He's better at comforting if I'm really upset, like crying level, but that doesn't happen often.
He can be cuddly, and sometimes we go to the beach together. There's not much else he does that makes me feel loved.

>>17110308
He's only been taking them for a little bit. My issues with him started before that, just the no-sex thing is a recent problem.

>>17109844
>>17110120

>love-love terrority
same guy, eurofag so i went to sleep.
I meant kisses/cuddles, making sure she got her rocks off, etc etc.
medication made it hard for me to get hard, which led to me not wanting to have sex. find something you both enjoy that could be done with you sitting on his lap, and using his hand, ease into it, seem like you've been going at it like seduction=boner=sex, it will take longer so make sure you have an evening or morning free.

>>17110880
Set-up a date night, not always a go out par-tay night, but good meal, nice atmosphere helps, get comfortable. (don't always put the burden on yourself, alternative whose turn the arrangements are, you go first and then help him with his first turn.)
Talk and plan, make him get committed, open a dialogue of the things he does that make you feel loved

If he started acting weirder around the time he started showing signs for the need of sleep-meds, could be linked?