I have a habit, or in some manner, an addiction, to cocoa beans.

tl;dr
Have my trigeminal nerve root trapped between a blood vessel and a muscle, causes a lot of pain sometimes, causes pain all the time. Years of this have caused an anxiety response to the things that can cause pain or be functionally crippling. Cacao has been a good tool, but I can't solve my core problems, and I'm sick of a lot of its unwanted aspects.

Can't do it, not even if sober. Maybe something else might provide the means to finally understand.

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Bump.

Wait what
You can get high off cocao beans or something?
That's fuckin wack man

Also get some fucking surgery for the trapped nerve and get addiction treatment for the cacao if that's an issue as well. Don't look for a substitute for the thing you're addicted to, look for a method to cut out the addiction from your life.

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>>16997909
So.... you're a chocoholic?

Wow never knew this about cacao beans...
http://www.living-foods.com/articles/toxiccacao.html

>>16998066
Agreed

>>16998066
Nah, it's bullshit dreamed up by über-hippies trying to eat the weirdest "natural" shit they can find in some far-flung third-world shithole. Have you ever gotten high off of a Mars bar? Then attempting to eat an actual cocoa bean isn't really going to do shit. Plus, they're actually inedible until they've gone through quite a long and surprisingly process, involving fermentation and various mad-scientist-type shit.

>>16998066
>You can get high off cocao beans or something?
You can. I'd somewhat compare it with dextroamphetamine, without a lot of the "spike" part of the "up", though the comedown is very similar. It's like a mild amphetamine mixed with caffeine. There's another "feel good" insight / edge to it, that I can't really describe. You remain highly functional, but can be out of it in a way you can't always meaningfully contextualize at the time.

Surgery is very risky because it potentially involves severing the blood vessel, which can cause strokes, hearing loss, etc (imaging suggests this). At best you end up with a pad between the nerve and blood vessel.

I've tried to stop using it, I've tried to use it better, and it seems I can't make any avenue lead anywhere decent. No matter what, there is something missing or wrong. I stopped with the yerba mate / cocoa beans for a week and then ate some today, now I'm feeling addled. I suppose I'm not really willing to go too deep with a mind for change. I did a lot of that for years, and decided enough. Eventually you must put the cover back on the black box that is the mind, and try to find a way to live and actually get something done. It drives you either to madness or apathy.

>>16998125
>yerba mate
Fuck dude that is my vice right there. I've been weaning off it though.
Anyway, get some addiction help for real. Of the nerve being trapped is a legitimate health hazard, then do the surgery, fuck the risks. If the surgery isn't urgent, or can't be done at all due to risk of complications, then get some painkillers and follow a regimen to avoid abuse. Get friends and family involved if you have to. Seek treatment, for real this time, or suffer. Those are your options as I see it. I'm sorry, but I cant think of anything better to tell you.

>>16998087
>http://www.living-foods.com/articles/toxiccacao.html
Most of this article is false, or disingenuous. I actually stumbled on that the other day and wrote to the author, but they probably won't change anything. I think cacao is a drug and should be viewed as such, but it's much better to provide people with solid information to develop their own informed risk assessment than bullshitting then into "cacao is evil and toxic".

>>16998100
>Have you ever gotten high off of a Mars bar?
Mars bars contain very little of the original psychoactive components, and contain very little chocolate to begin with. Alkalizing strips flavanols, phenylethylamine, endocannabinoid reuptake inhibitors (the ones capable of crossing the intestine and blood brain barrier), etc.

>Plus, they're actually inedible until they've gone through quite a long and surprisingly process, involving fermentation and various mad-scientist-type shit.
Almost all cacao is fermented before being husked (quite a lot of research has gone into what bacterial cultures work best for which region). Sometimes they're roasted afterwards. They're largely edible beforehand though.

>>16998145
It's been around a decade, and I had other problems beforehand. I think I have a bit of a different perspective on this because I was fucked before the game even started. I have known this for a long time. I kind of knew, mechanically, what was probably causing it for a while. Only got it diagnosed a few years ago, so I suppose things are set up now so the option is easily on the table.

Thanks for the advice. I stopped using any sort of drug for around a year at one point. It was a pretty garbage year. Maybe I've just (intentionally) forgotten there might be another way to live.

>>16998152
how did you get your cocoa fix? did you eat raw cacao powder or whole cocoa beans?

>>16998152
> original psychoactive components
Oh. Just for better completeness, I forgot to mention salsolinol. It's capable of being transported across the intestinal wall, but it's unknown if it can cross the blood brain barrier or its metabolic half life. Research has been conflicting, but it's there nonetheless. Dried bananas are another common source.

>>16998195
Originally I ate unprocessed powder (cocoa solids). Now I tend to eat the whole beans or cacao nibs (crushed beans), or certain chocolate chips made with chocolate liquor (and with cocoa butter itself as the emulsifier).

The nibs and whole beans can have bacteria and mold (non-visibly) growing on them, though I've yet to have a problem. It's possible someone with digestive problems, or who's immunosuppressed, could have problems, worth mentioning. Aflatoxin levels on raw nibs and in commercially processed chocolate tend to be similar and fairly low, however.

I like the very slight alcohol taste to the nibs, and they're more cost effective.

>>16998217
Oh, a lot of nibs are actually roasted as well. Which remove the bacteria / mold, along with some of the phenylethylamine.

Anyone have a suggestion for the phenibut question?

>>16998217
interesting. i eat about 2 teaspoons of raw cacao powder per day but i've never gotten a high off it that i can tell. i just like how it tastes with fruit and pancakes. guess i'm not eating a high enough quantity.

>>16998258
I'd say it's mostly dosage vs time, and to a lesser extent individual physiology. ~2.5 oz does it for me (and might be a bit too much). Nibs that I put in boiling water for 30 seconds were more or less inert however.

Bumping one last time for a good place to buy phenibut.